>>796304
I like to pretend My car is a landspeeder, and and I charge all the neighborhood kids screaming "FOR THE EMPEROR"

I pretend I kill people. Yes, pretend.

I like wearing my punch gloves/coat because I can pretend I'm a combine soldier.

CAN. PICK IT UP.

I do cocaine and ride my bicycle and pretend im doomrider. And i constantly scream " LET US RACE!!!"

Lulz ensue.

I like the summer because when I wear hot pants it feels like I'm wearing nothing at all

You're all faggots.

I like my job making pizzas because I have a metal peel (one of those things that gets the pizza in/out of the oven) that makes me feel like a sturdy dwarven warrior.

>>796321

>>796324
>feels like I'm wearing nothing at all

>nothing at all

>nothing at all

Stupid sexy fa/tg/uy!

I ride my motorcycle around warzones and strapped huge fucking guns to it. When people say it's a stupid idea, I reply "stupid for only another 38,000 years."

Then I charge into assault with them.

>>796328
verily.

Sometimes, I poop when I masterbate, then I lick the poop and smear it on my dick to use as lube.

Every time I get into a ski race, I pretend THAT FUCKING YETI IS AFTER ME AAAAGGGHHHH

I usually win the race, except for that one I tried to light the tree on fire.

I like winter because I feel like a Commissar when I wear my long black overcoat.

I like /tg/ because it's like /b/ with 40k

I pretend to be like a necron, and sleep for the longest possible time, wake up, and have people complain how powerful I am. And I have the nerve to revover from many NERRRRRRD RAGEEEEE's. Then mystically I phase out, Bawwww about the few units I can field, then continue to sleep for the longest possible time. TL'DR

>>796327

We're going to have a dwarf-owned pizzeria/tavern now.

>11/12/07(Mon)15:20
3:20 already? High Schools should go for longer.

I like winter because when I'm in the outskirts of town I can pretend there's a nuclear winter.

Without the mushroom clouds and fallout.

I like wearing a hoodie and yelling at people that go into my secret grove because then I can feel like a druid.

>>796304

You bastard. That made me laugh and thus spit coffee all over my keyboard.

I like summer because when its hot out my taint sweats constantly.

I like being fat cause then I can pretend I'm president of the swarm of cats that live in my house.

I like to pretend I'm the little girl.

>>796390
I like to pretend you're a little girl too...

*fapfapfapfapfap*

Whenever I get in my suit for my job, I pretend I'm actually a government agent, preparing for another harrowing day of staring stone faced at incomprehensible horrors from beyond and putting .40 S&W bullets in them.

Instead, I stare at screaming accountants, look unpleasant, and inform them I'm going to audit them, not like it'll actually do anything.

This thread makes me lol, mostly because I relate to OP

I like to pretend I'm a general of a great army fighting an epic battle when I sit on the toilet.

I like winter because I have snowpants that go SCHWOOF SCHWOOF SCHWOOF when I walk. And because the sound of inner tubes flying across tighly-packed snow sounds like something out of Star Wars.

I have a morning ritual that I need to share. I call it 'the terminator'. First I crouch down in the shower in the classic 'naked terminator traveling through time' pose. With my eyes closed I crouch there for a minute, visualizing either Arnold or the guy from the second movie (not the chick in the third one because that one sucked) and I start to hum the terminator theme. Then I slowly rise to a standing position and open my eyes. It helps me to proceed through my day as an emotionless, cyborg badass. The only problem is if the shower curtain sticks to my terminator leg. It ruins the fantasy.

>>796459

Probably one of the best plates of pasta 4chan's responsible for.

>>796448
FUCK OFF MEDIC

I go into the middle of the woods, get a bit lost, wandering around with my massive two handed, one sided battle ax, and sit, crosslegged in the woods, chanting various war chants until my heart beats till it feel like it will burst, and then get up in a rush, and start attacking illusionary warriors in my minds eyes with the large ax.

It's good exercise, and helps me stay sane for another day.

>>796502
I pray for no one to go near you

>>796507

I doubt anyone within ear shot would even think I was human from the sounds I make.

Although I am sure one of these days I am going to see red and blue lights flickering in the distance.

>>796502
ever try hitchhiking with a large weapon like an axe?

lulz ensue. also police are usually called.

>>796526

I hitch hiked in full viking garb to a SCA event. I was wearing a bear skin cloak, a large ram horn helmet, and had my ax strapped to my back.

Lucky for me, person who picked me up was heading right there, so all I got was a nice travel buddy who liked my helmet.

Although I do want to wander around Seattle in full garb.

>>796538

Tell people you work for Capital One.

>>796563

I lol'd.

>>796563

It could just work....

>>796563
And ask people what's in their wallets?

Either you've just executed one of the more interesting muggings, you have injected humor into some poor fellow's life.

>>796563
This thread is the winningest thread ive seen in a while

Sometimes when I´m running on the treadmill, I pretend I´m viking charging at the enemy.

I liek 4chan because it feels like i have friends who get me.

>>797286

I concur. I LOVE YOU GUYS.

>>797216
You have low standards.

I like war because it feels like I'm wearing a coat when I wear my power armor.

I like my power armor because the padded armor that holds the interface connections for my subdermal neral nodes is soft and spongey and keeps me warm on those near sub-zero ice worlds

I like power armor because it feels like a heavy coat when I wear winter.

I like wrapping myself in a blanket, turning off all the lights, and pretending that its the apocalypse and I'm holed up inside frightened for my life.

Then my boyfriend comes downstairs and is all like "What are you doing" and he turns on the lights and I scream "NOOOOO! THE ALIENS WILL SEE US!"

And then we have kinky end of the world sex.

>>797216

I don't believe you have thread. Enjoy your standards.

>>797347

I don't believe you have vagina. Enjoy your homosexuality.

>>797350
He never said he had a vagina.

>>797350
>>797351
correct. I am in fact male.

>>797351

Oh well played Anon

>>797359
Fag

>>797368
Correct. Tripfag in both parts of the word. Nice to meet you.

>>797368
pot, kettle, etc.

>>797368

ba-dum chh