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  • File :1196143536.jpg-(9 KB, 357x296, waaagh..jpg)
    9 KB Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)01:05 No.842350  
    'UMIE BREAD, SQUISHY BREAD, SPIKEY BREAD, 'RE REAL, BUT ORKY BREAD, WAAAAGHLOAF, DON' EXIST. SO, WE'S GOTZ TA MAKE IT. DIS 'ERE'S DA STORY 'A THA GROT WHAT HAS A DOUGHY POWERKLAW, SQUIGSTICK KRUSTKRUNCHER, WOT'LL MAKE TASTY GOBFODDER ALL ORKY, SO'S ALL DA CLANZ CAN EAT RIGHT TASTY LUMPS!
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)01:12 No.842385
    What the hell?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)01:14 No.842390
    >>842350
    Waaaghloaf is made using rocks, mud, dakka, and stompy.
    >> Nasty Sunny Beam 11/27/07(Tue)01:15 No.842393
    This would be pretty embarrassing for even /a/ I think.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)01:15 No.842395
    >>842390
    Also, it is red.
    Grab some early... it always goes fast.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)01:18 No.842400
    >>842395
    That is... INCREDIBLY corny.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)01:21 No.842414
    >>842395
    da red is 'umie bludd an' sumfink fruity
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)01:24 No.842423
    >>842400
    sum co'n be innit too. co'n is righ' dakka if ya ask da likes o' me.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)01:25 No.842432
    >>842350
    Hai there guvna-san. Wouldst this be that new spinoff show of Wallhamer?
    Kawaii desu pip pip
    >> Bread Cultist L'Pain 11/27/07(Tue)01:26 No.842433
    GUH!

    THE ORKS ARE PRODUCING SOME SORT OF NEW BREAD, BRETHREN!

    WE MUST CLAIM IT FOR THE BREAD GOD!
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)01:29 No.842440
    >>842432
    Goddamn britaboos
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)01:29 No.842442
    lulzy.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)01:34 No.842456
         File :1196145266.png-(227 KB, 766x917, 1188711697613.png)
    227 KB
    SCONES FOR THE SCONE THRONE!
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)01:35 No.842459
         File :1196145325.jpg-(17 KB, 300x390, Pierrot_Bonnaz_Yakitate_Japan_(...).jpg)
    17 KB
    The Eldar Harlequins will be the judge of the quality of this "Waaaghloaf."
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:07 No.842547
    >>842433
    +1
    >> Paorou-sama !jXvdPmWDes 11/27/07(Tue)02:17 No.842593
    >>842547
    ORKY BREAD GET

    EAT ORKY BREAD!? Y/N
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:22 No.842609
    >>842593
    Y

    You feel strong after eating the bread and run your cattle through a strong river. 2 cattle die and a wheel is broken. You have no replacements.

    You and your family starve on your way to Oregon.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:22 No.842613
    >>842609
    Loot Oregon
    >> Paorou-sama !jXvdPmWDes 11/27/07(Tue)02:25 No.842623
    >>842613
    Command not recognized.

    You need at least 50 humanoid cohorts to succesfully perform this action.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:25 No.842624
    >>842613
    2 gold pieces and a cloak of fire protection
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:26 No.842629
    >>842613
    Loot oregon for 3 gold pieces.
    An old miner begs for some money for food.
    DENY FOOD Y/N
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:27 No.842633
    >>842629
    Eat old miner.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:29 No.842645
    >>842633
    You attempt to eat old miner.
    Filthy denim gets caught in your teeth.
    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:30 No.842648
    Loot Grue
    >> \ 11/27/07(Tue)02:31 No.842656
    >>842645
    OOH OOH OOH THIS IS THE SECRET EVERYONE'S BEEN TALKING ABOUT IN THIS GAME! DIG A HOLE NOW!
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:33 No.842662
    >>842648
    Grue remains unlootable.

    >>842656
    You dig a hole.
    Underneath you is a yo-yo, some KY jelly, and an old floppy of Space Simulator.
    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:33 No.842663
    >>842656
    You dug a hole, you lost THE GAME.

    Restart Y/N?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:35 No.842672
    >>842663
    THE GAME
    I LOST IT
    >> Paorou-sama !jXvdPmWDes 11/27/07(Tue)02:36 No.842675
    >>842672
    You forgot to take the miner out then spit him into the hole.

    DUH.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:37 No.842677
    >>842675
    SPIT MINER INTO HOLE
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:41 No.842688
    >>842677
    Bloody, mangled, chewed corpse of old miner is now in the hole.

    Underneath you is a yo-yo, some KY jelly, and an old floppy of Space Simulator. They are covered by the remains of OLD MINER.

    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:42 No.842693
    >>842688
    Examine miner
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:43 No.842694
    >>842693
    His dick is sticking out from his pants.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:43 No.842696
    Dance
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:44 No.842699
    >>842694
    take KY jelly
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:44 No.842702
    >>842699
    You pick up KY jelly. It's warm.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:45 No.842706
    >>842702
    use KY jelly on dick
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:45 No.842707
    >>842696

    Dancing apparently does nothing.

    >>842699
    You took the KY Jelly from under the OLD MINER's remains.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:48 No.842717
    >>842706
    Your dick implodes. You are now a woman.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:49 No.842724
    >>842719
    Take dick and shove it in >>842717's ass.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:49 No.842725
    >>842717
    >>842719
    This is going places. Lets go to other places than that.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:53 No.842736
    >>842706
    the miner's dick transforms into a unicorn's horn.

    IS THIS AWESOME Y/N
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:55 No.842742
    >>842736
    Y

    Examine Space Simulator
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:57 No.842744
    >>842742
    You pick up Space Simulator. It is still warm.

    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)02:57 No.842745
    >>842744
    use KY jelly on Space Simulator
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:00 No.842756
    >>842745
    you liberally apply KY jelly on the floppy disk.
    The disky becomes covered in KY jelly.
    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:01 No.842757
    >>842756
    put Space Simulator in miner's ass
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:03 No.842769
    >>842757
    You jam the Space Simulator floppy disk into the dead miner's rectum.
    The casing of the floppy disk shatters.
    The dead miner's rectum is torn and shards of a floppy disk are layed about you.
    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:04 No.842771
    >>842769
    north
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:04 No.842772
    <3 /tg/
    >> Paorou-sama !jXvdPmWDes 11/27/07(Tue)03:05 No.842774
    >>842771
    ARE YOU SURE YOU DON'T WANT TO ROLL FOR ANAL CIRCUMFERENCE?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:05 No.842775
    >>842771
    you walk north, covered in floppy disk and KY jelly.
    You come to a kite-eating tree.
    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:06 No.842778
    >>842775
    Ask kite why it's eating the tree
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:07 No.842782
    >>842778
    The kite turns to you and asks why you're covered in floppy disk and KY Jelly.
    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:09 No.842785
    >>842772
    yes
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:09 No.842786
    >>842782
    give kite KY jelly
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:09 No.842787
         File :1196150994.jpg-(144 KB, 377x538, tophat.jpg)
    144 KB
    pip pip
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:12 No.842792
    >>842786
    Kite takes KY Jelly and ingests it.
    Kite turns into a bad-enough dude.
    Bad enough dude requests to join party to Oregon.
    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:14 No.842794
    no
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:15 No.842797
    >>842794
    You NO.
    Bad-enough dude walks away, sobbing.
    The old miner and yo-yo still remain in the ditch south of you.
    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:17 No.842800
    >>842797
    take yo-yo
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:18 No.842802
    >>842800
    BRIDGET appears
    He asks if you will give him the yo-yo.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:18 No.842803
    >>842800
    You take the yo-yo.
    It is made of wood and has a pentagram carved into the underside.
    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:19 No.842805
    >>842800
    MAGICAL BLACKSMITH APPEARS
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:20 No.842808
    we need RP hreads like this more often
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:21 No.842812
    >>842800
    *Ahem* The yoyo is wooden, has a pentagram underneath, and is slippery with leftover KY jelly.

    Bridget and a magical Blacksmith apopear.

    Bridget wants the yoyo. Magical blacksmith seems to be mulling about.

    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:21 No.842814
    >>842803
    touch the pentagram and your penis
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:23 No.842819
    >>842814
    MAGICAL BLACKSMITH IS FURIOUS AND HIS MUSTACHE BECOMES A SPHINX THAT SHOOTS LASERS OUT OF HIS EYES

    IT THEN RAPES BRIDGET
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:23 No.842822
    >>842814
    Your penis begins to erect.
    The pentagram causes Bridget to explode and the Magical Blacksmith to mull about at a faster pace.
    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:24 No.842825
    >>842822
    raff or ruse
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:25 No.842828
    >>842825
    You decide to Raff or Ruse.
    The Magical Blacksmith looks at you with LAZER EYES LAZER EYES LOOK INTO MY LAZER EYES.
    You wet yourself.
    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:27 No.842835
    stare back
    then taste your pee
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:28 No.842836
    I kick off my urine-soaked trousers and hurl them into the Magical Blacksmith's eyes.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:30 No.842840
    >>842835
    You stare intently at the Magical Blacksmith as he stares into you with his piercing red eyes.
    Then you pucker your mouth as you find the urine tastes salty.

    >>842836
    The trousers you toss lands in the Magical Blacksmith's red eyes.
    He begins to run around in circles, shouting and screaming profanities.
    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:32 No.842842
    see what kind of underwear you are wearing
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:33 No.842844
    >>842840
    eat blacksmith
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:33 No.842845
    >>842836
    >>842835
    Hey guys, can I join ur party?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:33 No.842846
    >>842842
    You look down and find you are wearing Large, bright orange Fruit-Of-The-Loom boxers.
    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:34 No.842847
    >>842846
    blind blacksmith with garishly bright boxers
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:34 No.842849
    >>842844
    You attempt to eat the blacksmith.
    His face tastes salty, but the est of him is too large to fit in your mouth.
    You begin to choke on his beard.
    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:35 No.842852
    >>842849
    spit out beard
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:35 No.842853
    >>842847
    Magical Blacksmith is already blinded.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 3 11/27/07(Tue)03:36 No.842858
    >>842849
    I slice the rest of his body parts with my fork and knife
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:36 No.842860
    >>842852
    You spit out the beard.
    From the beard comes a One Fish.
    He requests you find the legendary Two Fish, the Mystical Red Fish, and the amazing Blue Fish for a signle fish wish.
    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:37 No.842861
    >>842860
    eat fish
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:37 No.842864
    >>842858
    You attempt to cut up Magical Blacksmith.
    His skin is made of Dragonforce, and breaks your fork and knife.
    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:38 No.842865
    >>842861
    You eat the One Fish.
    It tasted fishy.
    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:38 No.842868
    >>842864
    eat dragonforce
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:38 No.842869
    >>842864
    Use Children of Bodom on Blacksmith
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:39 No.842872
    >>842865
    belch
    >> Player 3 11/27/07(Tue)03:39 No.842873
    >>842864
    I decide to look for something else to eat.

    Goad Player 1 (Person who ate fish) into joining me.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:40 No.842875
    >>842868
    You attempt to eat the Dragonforce.
    It does not suit your metallic tastes, as it tastes of tapping and fail.

    >>842869
    Children of Bodom stuns Blacksmith.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)03:40 No.842876
    >>842873
    eat Player 3
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:41 No.842879
    >>842875
    Use yo-yo on blacksmith.
    >> Player 3 11/27/07(Tue)03:41 No.842882
    >>842876
    OH NO YOU DIDN'T

    I roll for Devour Resistance!
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)03:42 No.842885
    >>842882
    I roll for maw circumference
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:42 No.842886
    >>842872
    You belch loudly.
    It tastes fishy.

    >>842873
    You attempt to get Player One into looking for some more food.
    Player One has just belched.
    You are KO'd.

    >>842876
    Player One eats Player Three.
    Player Three was infected with the Syphilis Virus.
    You have Syphilis.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)03:43 No.842892
    >>842886
    throw up player 3
    >> Player 3 11/27/07(Tue)03:43 No.842893
    >>842886
    FUCK THIS GAME SUCKS

    I QUIT GOD DAMN IT
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:44 No.842897
    >>842879
    The yo-yo bounces harmlessly off of the Blacksmith's Dragonforce.
    He looks slightly aroused.

    >>842882
    You roll a 20.
    Too bad this isn't a dice game.

    >>842885
    Your maw is 13 inches wide.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)03:44 No.842901
    >>842897
    My mouth is HUEG!
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:45 No.842903
    >>842892
    Player Three is barfed up.
    He smeels lightly of Stomach Acids.

    >>842893
    Player Three quits.
    The corpse falls on the ground with a thud.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)03:46 No.842905
    >>842903
    find cure for syphilis.
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:46 No.842906
    i am loling lots
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:47 No.842908
    >>842905
    You ask Blacksmith how to cure syphilis.
    He asks you throw the yo-yo at him again.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)03:48 No.842910
    >>842908
    use penis on blacksmith
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:49 No.842912
    >>842910
    You begin to slap the blacksmith's left arm with your penis, now sticking out of your orange boxers.
    He appears displeased.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)03:49 No.842914
    >>842912
    use penis on corpse
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)03:50 No.842917
    >>842914
    You begin to slap Player Three's corpse with your penis.
    Player Three's corpse is still warm to the touch.
    COMMAND?
    >> Paorou-sama !jXvdPmWDes 11/27/07(Tue)03:51 No.842920
    As the official Backseat driver of this game, we will have a listing of the PCs:

    Player 1 : Specialty is Devouring; has a 13-inch mouth.

    Player 2 : Amalgam of anonymous doing whatever. Lack specialization, so is outshined by player 1.

    Player 3 : Some newfag who obviously does not know the game system. Quit shortly after joining.
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)03:52 No.842924
    >>842920
    I was the anonymous who sodomized the farmer's corpse
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)03:52 No.842926
    >>842920
    And the DM.

    DM appears unenthused.
    CONTINUE PLAYING Y/N
    >> Paorou-sama !jXvdPmWDes 11/27/07(Tue)03:53 No.842931
    >>842924
    Hmmn, but you succeeded by eating stuff, so far.

    Your class would still be DEVOURER.
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)03:53 No.842932
    >>842917
    stick yo-yo in corpse's ass.
    give corpse to blacksmith
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)03:53 No.842935
    >>842926
    J
    >> Player 2 11/27/07(Tue)03:55 No.842943
    >>842935
    Hope you saved your game.
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)03:56 No.842944
    >>842943
    I lol
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)03:56 No.842945
    >>842932
    You attempt to jam the yo-yo into Player Three's rectum.
    The yo-yo fits snugly.
    You hand over the corpse to the Magical Blacksmith.
    The Blacksmith appears giddy, and shouts with glee.
    The Blacksmith takes out a rusty pipe from inside his vest.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)03:56 No.842946
    >>842945
    take pipe
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)03:57 No.842950
    >>842943
    Player Two becomes a full-fledged character.
    Player Two is a sexually inept wizard.
    IS THIS AWESOME Y/N
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)03:58 No.842953
    >>842950
    he's a 4channer with magic?
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)03:59 No.842956
    >>842946
    You take the pipe.
    It is lightweight and weak.
    The Blacksmith runs away with Player Three's Corpse and yo-yo.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 2 11/27/07(Tue)03:59 No.842957
    >>842950
    Y
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)03:59 No.842958
    >>842956
    I wanted to shove the pipe in his ass.
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:00 No.842960
    >>842953
    Yes.
    Player Two also has a mild case of ED.
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:00 No.842962
    >>842956
    use penis on Player 2
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:01 No.842964
    >>842958
    You cannot find Blacksmith again.
    You jam the pipe up Player Two's ass instead.
    Player two stands perfectly still and alert.
    COMMAND?
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:01 No.842970
    >>842962
    You wave your penis in front of Player Two.
    Player Two still stands alert, with a rusty pipe sticking out of his rectum.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:02 No.842971
    >>842970
    Is player 2 standing erect
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:03 No.842975
    >>842971
    Player Two's member is half-erect.
    COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)04:04 No.842977
    oh god... my sides hurt.
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:05 No.842982
    >>842975
    put >>842977's sides in Player 2's ass.
    >> Player 4 11/27/07(Tue)04:05 No.842983
    Hay guiz, wats goin-OH JESUS CHRIST, WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT? WITH THE YO-YO, AND THE GUY, OH LORD
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:07 No.842989
    >>842982
    You jam NPC's sides into Player Two's rectum.
    Player Two clenches, but still stands firsm and still.
    COMMAND?

    >>842983
    Player Four has become a full-fledged character.
    Player Four is a slutty man-ninja.
    IS THIS AWESOME Y/N
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:08 No.842990
    >>842989
    Is player 2 erect
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:09 No.842992
    >>842990
    Player Two is fully erect and dribbling pre-ejaculate.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:10 No.842994
    >>842992
    How many point's do I get for curing player 2 ED?
    >> Player 4 11/27/07(Tue)04:12 No.842999
    I quickly disappear and begin to fap at the sight of the blacksmith, throwing darts randomly at Player 1
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:13 No.843002
    >>842999
    eat darts
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:13 No.843004
    >>842994
    You gain 7 EXP for curing Player Two's ED.
    However, Player Two's ED will return if items in rectum are removed, or remain in rectum too long.
    Anal Circumference deteriorates to larger size and must be replentished to a larger size every 3 days for 12 days by fitting in more items.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:14 No.843007
    north
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:15 No.843009
    >>842999
    Player Four orgasms loudly and manages to hit Player one in the eye with a dart.

    >>843002
    Player One attempts to eat the dart, but it is lodged too far back into his eye socket to reach with his lips.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 4 11/27/07(Tue)04:15 No.843011
    >>843002
    Coat darts in super glue
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:16 No.843012
    >>843007
    Player One walks North a pace.
    He falls into a hole full of dead Old Miner.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:16 No.843014
    >>843009
    throw player 2 at player 4
    >> Player 4 11/27/07(Tue)04:17 No.843017
    >>843009
    Artificially insemenate blacksmith
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:17 No.843021
    >>843017
    he left
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:18 No.843023
    >>843011
    Player four coats the dark in Player One's eye socket with superglue.
    Player One tears up quietly.

    >>843014
    Player One gets up from ditch, with dart in eye, and tosses the still alert Player Two at Player Four.
    Player Four loses three toes on his left foot and a pocketwatch.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:19 No.843025
    >>843023
    put hand up corpses ass and use it as a puppet
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:19 No.843026
    >>843017
    Blacksmith is nowhere to be seen.
    Semen litters the forest floor.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 4 11/27/07(Tue)04:19 No.843028
    Pickup pocketwatch and inspect miner corpse
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:21 No.843034
    >>843025
    Player one jams his hand up the Old Miner's corpses' rectum and attempts to pupeteer.
    He is adept at corpse pupeteering. +5 PUPETEERING SKILL.

    >>843028
    Pocketwatch picked up.
    It says 4:20. It is 1:20.
    Player Four inspects dead old miner corpse puppet.
    It appears to be a normal dead old miner corpse puppet.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:22 No.843038
    >>843034
    >It appears to be a normal dead old miner corpse puppet with player 1's hand up its ass.
    fixed
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:23 No.843040
    >>843034
    use puppet to communicate with Player 4.
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:23 No.843042
    >>843038
    Player One notices something within the dead old miner's corpse's bowels. It appears to have a light suction effect upon his fingers.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:24 No.843044
    >>843039
    >OHSHIT! Thats not a minor!
    I hope not, my hand is up his ass.
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:24 No.843045
    >>843040
    You turn the puppet to Player Four and make it mouth the words "OLIVE JUICE."
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 4 11/27/07(Tue)04:25 No.843048
    >>843034
    Adjust pocketwatch to read 6:06:06.00
    Begin summoning a Greater Daemon
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:26 No.843050
    >>843048
    eat demon
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:27 No.843051
    >>843048
    You adjust the pocketwatch to read 6.06.06.00.
    Nothing happens.
    You attempt to summon Greater Daemon.
    You divide by zero.
    A black hole appears in the space where you divided by zero and begins to swallow up the world, beginning with Player Two.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 4 11/27/07(Tue)04:27 No.843052
    >>843050
    Ninjastun Player One before daemon is devoured
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:27 No.843053
    >>843051
    eat black hole
    >> Player 4 11/27/07(Tue)04:28 No.843055
    >>843051
    Throw things into the void to see what happens, beginning with Player One's left peg leg
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:29 No.843057
    >>843050
    Player One attempts ot eat nonexistant demon.
    You begin to gnaw at the air, saying "OM NOM NOM."

    >>843052
    You ninjastun Player One.
    Player One releases his bowels onto the floor.
    The black hole becomes larger, and sucks up the dead old miner's corpse's puppet.
    COMMAND?
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:31 No.843060
    >>843053
    Player One attempts to eat black hole.
    Player one loses his face.
    Player one stares calmly at Player Four.

    >>843055
    Player Four throws Player One's peg leg into the black hole.
    The black hole swallows the peg leg.
    Player One falls over, crippled.
    The Black Hole becomes alrger and sucks up Player One's other leg.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 4 11/27/07(Tue)04:31 No.843063
    >>843057
    Find one of my severed toes and write I LOVE HORSE COCK on Player One's forehead with his feces and my toe blood
    >> Anonymous 11/27/07(Tue)04:31 No.843064
    oh christ... this is good. needs to be archived :'(
    >> Player 2 11/27/07(Tue)04:32 No.843065
    I forcefully remove things from my ass and use my ED to cause a time paradox.
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:32 No.843067
    >>843060
    I use the inverse property of division.
    multiply by zero.
    >> Player 4 11/27/07(Tue)04:32 No.843068
    >>843060
    Divide by zero again to open another Black Hole to devour the first one
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:34 No.843073
    >>843063
    Player Four finds a severed pinky toe.
    Player Four dips it in Player One's feces.
    Player Four writes "I LOVE HORSE COCK" on Player One's forehead.

    >>843065
    Player Two removes the object from his ass and gains ED status.
    Time Paradox: Another black hole is made.
    The black holes suck each other up and create a Pime Taradox. A larger black hole is formed.
    Player one loses his middle torso and upper arms.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:35 No.843075
    >>843073
    I use the inverse property of division. multiplying my the same value will cancel the same divisions.
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:36 No.843077
    >>843075
    *by
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:36 No.843078
    >>843067
    Player One multiplies by 0. Black Hole remains.

    >>843068
    Player Four divides by 0 again. A third black hole is formed and is promptly swallowed up by the large black hole.
    The black hole becomes larger.
    Player One's bust remains.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:37 No.843079
    >>843078
    open portal and go through it
    >> Player 2 11/27/07(Tue)04:38 No.843081
    Find Physicist who can solve this quandary.
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:38 No.843082
    >>843081
    you can try using your penis on the black hole.
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:39 No.843083
    >>843079
    Player One is thinking with portals.
    Player One escapes the black holes.
    GLaDOS is not amused.

    PLAYER ONE 1ST PLACE.

    TWO PLACES REMAIN.

    Black hole become larger. 3 turns before it devours the world.
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:39 No.843084
    >>843083
    grow body
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:40 No.843086
    >>843083
    how many points do I get?
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:40 No.843088
    >>843081
    Player Four attempts to use skill: Physicist.
    World Effect: Religious Fanatacism cancels skill: Physicist.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 4 11/27/07(Tue)04:41 No.843089
    Stick penis in Player Two's eye socket
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:41 No.843090
    >>843088
    That's player 2
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:43 No.843093
    >>843084
    Player One regenerates body back, but much diminished in size.
    Maw size reduced to 7 inches.

    >>843086
    Player One gains 23 EXP. Player One levels up!
    CONGRATULATIONS.
    Gained Item: Tubgirl Shield.
    Gained Skill: Nerd Rage.
    >> Player 4 11/27/07(Tue)04:43 No.843095
    >>843083
    Meganinjastun black holes
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:44 No.843097
    >>843095
    take a four-dimensional piss on Player 4.
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:44 No.843098
    >>843090
    *Player Two's skill canceled.

    >>843089
    Player Four jams his penis into Player Four's eye socket.
    Player Two's eye stings slightly.
    Player Four gains 6 EXP.
    >> Player 4 11/27/07(Tue)04:45 No.843099
    >>843097
    Ninjadodge piss
    >> Player 2 11/27/07(Tue)04:45 No.843101
    >>843088

    RELIGIOUS FANATICISM ALLOWS ME TO SOLVE THIS WITH PRAYER!

    ATTEMPT PRAYER!

    (To bread god)
    >> Player 4 11/27/07(Tue)04:45 No.843102
    >>843098
    Repeat with Player One's eye that doesn't have a dart in it
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:46 No.843105
    >>843095
    Player Four attempts to meganinjastun Black Hole.
    Black hole increases in mass slightly.

    >>843097
    Player One pisses out of nowhere onto Player Four's head.
    Player Four feels refreshed.
    Black Hole increases in size.
    COMMAND?
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:46 No.843106
    grow one of my eyes on Player 4's forehead.
    >> Player 4 11/27/07(Tue)04:48 No.843109
    Portal Player One into Black Hole
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:50 No.843112
    >>843105
    I feed the black hole F.A.T.A.L.
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:50 No.843113
    >>843102
    >>843099
    Player Four ninjadodges Player One's piss.
    Player Four no longer frefreshed.

    >>843101
    Prayer fails, God doesn't take heed.

    >>843102
    Player Four attempts so jam penis into Player One's eyesocket, but misses.
    Player Four stubles into portal.
    PLAYER FOUR TAKES 2ND PLACE.

    CONGRATULATIONS.

    ONE PLACE LEFT.

    Player Four gains 15 EXP.
    Player Four levels up!
    Player Four gains item: Anonymity mask.
    Player Four gains skill: Technical Mumbo-Jumbo.

    >>843106
    Player One attempts to grow an eye onto Player Fours head.
    Player One critically misses.
    >> Player 666 11/27/07(Tue)04:51 No.843117
    Can I play?
    >> Player 2 11/27/07(Tue)04:52 No.843119
    >>843113
    Cast Awesome.
    >> Player 4 11/27/07(Tue)04:52 No.843121
    >>843113
    Don mask to disguise myself then use Technical Mumbo-Jumno to confuse Player Two
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:52 No.843122
    put hand up Player 4's ass and use him as a puppet.
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:52 No.843123
    >>843109
    Player Four portals Player One into black hole.
    Player One dies.

    >>843112
    Player One's F.A.T.A.L. leaks from his pocket into the black hole.
    Black Hole explodes.
    Black hole kills Player Two, Player Four.

    ALL CHARACTERS DEAD.
    END GAME Y/Y?

    RETRY GAME TOMORROW Y/Y?
    >> Player 4 11/27/07(Tue)04:52 No.843125
    In my eyes
    Indisposed
    In disguise
    As no one knows
    Hides the face
    Lies the snake
    The sun
    In my disgrace
    Boiling heat
    Summer stench
    neath the black
    The sky looks dead
    Call my name
    Through the cream
    And Ill hear you
    Scream again

    Black hole sun
    Wont you come
    And wash away the rain
    Black hole sun
    Wont you come
    Wont you come
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:53 No.843126
    >>843123
    Y

    Y
    >> Player 2 11/27/07(Tue)04:53 No.843129
    Good Game Everyone.

    I knew sexually-inept magician would be fuckhard to use.
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:54 No.843131
    >>843117
    Satan Joins Game.

    >>843119
    Player Two casts awesome from the grave.
    Player Two is now awesome.

    >>843121
    Player Four dons ghost mask and uses Techno Mumbo-Jumbo to confuse Player Two.
    Player Two confused, but still awesome.

    >>843122
    Player One shoves Player Four's dead rectum into his dead hand.
    Inside is cold.
    Player Four gains dead puppet status.

    THE END.
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:56 No.843134
    OK guys, I got nachos and gatorade tomorrow.
    You can all reroll when I return tomorrow night.
    >> Player 666 11/27/07(Tue)04:56 No.843136
    Aww! I didn't even get rape anyone!
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)04:57 No.843139
    >>843136
    Satan Rapes Players One, Two, Three, Four, Old Miner, Bridget, and Magical Blacksmith.
    IS THIS AWESOME Y/N
    >> Player 666 11/27/07(Tue)04:58 No.843146
    >>843139
    Y!
    >> Player 1 11/27/07(Tue)04:59 No.843148
    >>843139
    Shove other hand up Player 666's ass
    >> Player 666 11/27/07(Tue)05:00 No.843152
    moan and begin to masturbate
    >> Player 4 11/27/07(Tue)05:02 No.843154
    Ninjastun everyone, take their loot, run away to new guild, laughing about the whole thing
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)05:02 No.843155
    >>843148
    Player one uses Satan as ass-puppet.
    Satan gains puppet status.
    Player One feels thick, viscous liquid course down his leg.

    >>843152
    Satan begins to masturbate furiously, but has no demonseed left to expel.

    OK, goodnight Players. We return tomorrow night.
    LIVE LONG AND PROSPER? PERHAPS. LIVE FAT AND NECKBEARD? ASSURED.
    >> DM 11/27/07(Tue)05:03 No.843164
    >>843154
    Also, Player Four does this thing too.

    Night.
    >> Paorou-sama !jXvdPmWDes 11/27/07(Tue)05:06 No.843170
    FUKKEN SAVED


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