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  • File :1243146688.png-(64 KB, 600x400, 22.png)
    64 KB Dorf Quest IL Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)02:31 No.4644798  
    Previous Thread: >>4643050

    Musclebeard's weapons are destroyed in the madcap assault.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:32 No.4644808
    KEEP GOING!

    DEFOREST HIS DIVINE ESSENCE AND HAVE IT FOR YOURSELF!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:32 No.4644812
    Posting from previous thread.

    If Musclebeard is defeated....this song is now playing in your head.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7BMP-H2ydJk
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:33 No.4644822
    Did we do any actual damage to him?
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)02:33 No.4644823
         File :1243146834.png-(30 KB, 600x400, 23.png)
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    ...The lack of blood is disconcerting.
    >> Guardsman Ted 05/24/09(Sun)02:34 No.4644825
    Tear the floor up and through it at plotbeard.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:35 No.4644834
    >>4644823
    We got his beard! Hah! Now use your breath to set it on fire!
    >> Teacup the Terrific 05/24/09(Sun)02:35 No.4644841
    >>4644823
    One eye seems like a popular fashion accessory.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:36 No.4644844
    >>4644823
    Well fuck
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:36 No.4644847
    >>4644823
    He's either not a dorf, or his Toughness is so high that his skin doesn't break under the assault of Beardbeard.

    We should try to find out if Moradin is really behind this. Because if so, PANSY! Don't send your servants to do your bidding, come and get some yourself, Beardbeard will be happy to oblige!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:36 No.4644850
    >>4644841
    We didn't really lose ours for the sake of fashion. I doubt Musclebeard did either.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:37 No.4644861
    >>4644823

    ...Well, shit. Looks like we just pissed him off.

    ...Unless this is one of those scenes where the attack seems to do nothing, until blood starts gushing out of the guy and/or he collapses to the ground.
    >> Teacup the Terrific 05/24/09(Sun)02:37 No.4644862
    >>4644850
    Are you suggesting that he is about to LASER us?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:37 No.4644863
         File :1243147073.png-(18 KB, 180x120, Musclebeard.png)
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    >>4644847
    Well, there's this if it means anything.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:38 No.4644866
    >>4644847
    Musclebeard IS Moradin. BEARDBEARD might not know that, but WE do,
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:38 No.4644867
    >>4644823
    OH SHIT THE EYEPATCH IS OFF.
    If this remotely follows standard conventions of eyewear being removed from opponents, we are fucked.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:38 No.4644871
    >>4644823
    Internal injuries!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:39 No.4644874
    >>4644867

    ....Oh sweet mother of fuck.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:39 No.4644876
    >>4644847
    Musclebeared = Moradin not Moradin lackey
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:39 No.4644878
         File :1243147191.png-(46 KB, 600x400, Musclebeard CC.png)
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    >>4644863
    Here's one where you can actually see something.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:39 No.4644880
    Attempt to be a barber, shave MuscleBeard's beard. He'll lose half of his power
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)02:40 No.4644890
         File :1243147243.png-(55 KB, 600x400, 24.png)
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    >>4644834
    You follow up immediately with your next best attack. Your wintry breath, "BEARD!" is countered by his shout of "STONE!"
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:41 No.4644895
    Clearly Musclebeard's beard is the source of his power.

    USE ANTIMAGIC BIRD CAGE on MUSCLEBEARD'S HEAD/BEARD.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:41 No.4644897
    >>4644880
    Shave a Dorf's beard? That sounds like some faggoty elf tactic. Are you some kind of pansy ass elf?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:41 No.4644898
    >>4644890
    DISENGAGE QUICK
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:42 No.4644908
    >>4644890

    Oh fuck.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:42 No.4644912
    >>4644890
    Clearly he's getting weaker.

    Don't hesitate. Keep on going. We can do this!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:42 No.4644916
    I'm surprised that all of Buzzardloved isn't leveled by now.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:42 No.4644919
    >>4644890
    Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:43 No.4644928
    >>4644916
    Might very well have been. It's just not showing.
    >> The Scribbler 05/24/09(Sun)02:44 No.4644942
         File :1243147484.jpg-(16 KB, 246x253, Michael Wilson.jpg)
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    BEARDBEARD! MAKE YOUR OWN JUSTICE!
    >> The Scribbler 05/24/09(Sun)02:47 No.4644958
         File :1243147653.jpg-(12 KB, 300x300, Michael.jpg)
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    >>4644942
    SMASH HIM FASTER THEN A FLORIDA RECOUNT
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)02:48 No.4644965
         File :1243147707.png-(71 KB, 600x400, 25.png)
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    "AXE!" "CRAFT!"

    With a swipe of his hand, your axefoot is destroyed.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:49 No.4644976
    Lets hold an election to elect a new beard god. According to sections BEER AND ALE of the Dwarf Constitution, no Dwarf God may hold office sober and I don't smell ale on his breath.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:50 No.4644980
    >>4644965
    Did his beard just come back?

    Make a surprise move and stop using your special ability right in the middle of it: Trap his beard inside your antimagic field cage.
    >> Teacup the Terrific 05/24/09(Sun)02:50 No.4644983
         File :1243147836.jpg-(61 KB, 240x272, 1235307654840.jpg)
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    Well, it was nice knowing you, Beardbeard.

    Maybe you won't be a god, but there is no way you'll ever be forgotten. No amount of "the winners write history" will work. You are more than a man. You are more than a dwarf. You are a living natural disaster. A power that cannot be denied. A great hurricane that you must wait to blow itself out.. and hope there is something left to go to.

    You've achieved immortality, my friend.

    But.. as your vision grows dark.. ask yourself..
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:51 No.4644988
    >>4644965
    FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU... we have Ale, he'll probably top that but... Pride is our ace in the hole. He can't beat us there.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:51 No.4644989
    Hm. Are we beaten? We may be beaten.

    Maybe we should just apologize?
    >> Teacup the Terrific 05/24/09(Sun)02:51 No.4644991
         File :1243147892.jpg-(56 KB, 698x680, freakout.jpg)
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    >>4644983
    ..IS THAT REALLY ENOUGH FOR YOU?!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:52 No.4644994
    >>4644980
    This. Continue with Ale and Pride immediately afterwards: Without his beard, he's got nuthin' on us.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:52 No.4644995
    >>4644965
    Wait, are we about to get an AXE ALE BEARD PRIDE simultaneous with Musclebeard's ultimate?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:52 No.4644998
    >>4644965
    Oh shit, he's countering with the parts of dorfliness we suck at! first there's STONE CRAFT, what other thing made out of two words could he use that we suck at and how would we counter?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:52 No.4644999
    0 Logic or not, it is pretty obvious we are going to get our ass kicked if we don't stop this soon.

    What is Xom doing during this little exchange, anyhow?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:52 No.4645000
    >>4644991
    IT FUCKING HELL IS NOT!

    Open your eyes. OPEN THEM, YOU LAZY BUM!

    "...I didn't hear the bell."
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:53 No.4645001
    >>4644965
    OH SHIT! We were HORRIBLE at crafting.
    Wait... wait a tic..
    Oh my god, WE ARE MORODIN! Think about it, BOTH of these two Dorfs are the ULTIMATE DORF!
    MuscleBeard focuses on the shaping and creating aspects of Dorfhood, and we focus on the destruction aspects!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:54 No.4645010
    Counter with TOUGH.
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)02:54 No.4645013
         File :1243148059.png-(50 KB, 600x400, 26.png)
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    "RAGE." Musclebeard shouts. His double back hand sends you flying - like being hit with a boulder.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:54 No.4645015
    >>4644983
    My beard... my axe... MY BEARD AND MY AXE! THEY'RE MY SOUL! MY SOUL IS THE CORE OF ME AND MY BEARD AND AXE ARE ONE!"
    Pull out Axe of the Pit from within beard and attack Morabeard.
    "JUST WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM!?"
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:54 No.4645016
    >>4645013
    HE USES STONE.
    DESTROY THE FUCKING MOUNTAIN.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:55 No.4645020
    >>4645013
    Boulder?! WE ARE BEARDBEARD, WE TURN BOULDERS TO DUST!

    COUNTERATTACK: ALE!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:55 No.4645024
    >>4645013

    RAGE? That's it? WE'RE THE MOTHERFUCKIN' MASTERS OF RAGE, SHOW THAT COCK SUCKING GOD HOW IT'S DONEAADFLJ;AKFJA;SLFS
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:55 No.4645025
    >>4645001
    We can't destroy anything he hasn't created yet! But if we let him create stuff first, we can follow up by destroying it immediately afterwards!

    We can win this thing!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:55 No.4645026
    >>4645013
    We still have Pride, we have more pride then anything!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:56 No.4645029
    Stonecraft Rage?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:56 No.4645034
    We tie our Axe into our beard and began to wildly swing our beardaxe wildly
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:57 No.4645035
    >>4645001
    Two sides to the same coin... that makes TOO MUCH sense.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:59 No.4645046
    >>4645034
    Screw that, we tie our axe beard to his beard and then wildly swing him at himself
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)02:59 No.4645048
    We have tornout eyes on opposite sides too.
    >> Vector !NEy29ODpvs 05/24/09(Sun)02:59 No.4645049
    >>4644998
    I think the next one is fire, which we have partial(as in not our beard) immunity to.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:01 No.4645059
    If the next bit is RAGE ---- and is something that Beardbeard sucks at then the next part will be CONTROL
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:02 No.4645065
    >>4645048
    Holy fuck... if they combine into some sort of ULTRADORF god...
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)03:02 No.4645066
         File :1243148542.png-(65 KB, 600x400, 27.png)
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    You barely hear him proclaim "Honor" proudly.
    >> an elf 05/24/09(Sun)03:02 No.4645068
    KILLED BY YOUR OWN KIND? IM NOT SURPRISED! HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!
    >> Teacup the Terrific 05/24/09(Sun)03:03 No.4645078
         File :1243148613.gif-(1.04 MB, 150x150, 1229964659090.gif)
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    >>4645000
    >IT FUCKING HELL IS NOT!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:04 No.4645083
         File :1243148647.jpg-(18 KB, 244x320, manly tears.jpg)
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    >>4645066
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:04 No.4645084
    >>4645066
    Fuck... fuck, now what do we do?
    >>4645068
    Are you Garrelf by any chance? It's not your turn, go away.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:04 No.4645086
    >>4645066
    ... Xom.
    Xom, you there?
    We need to go One Winged Angel here.
    Give us healing. Cultist-style. As much as you've got.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:04 No.4645087
    It's probably time to think about our dorfiness and reflect a bit.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:04 No.4645089
    >>4645066
    PRIDE! GET BACK UP YOU SON OF A BITCH! GET BACK UP! You're too proud to die!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:04 No.4645095
    >>4645066
    Yeah, honor's good.

    BUT IT'S NOTHING WITHOUT PRIDE!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:05 No.4645099
    >>4645066
    Shit, if we are still coherent enough to speak, we should concede. Truly, we have been outDorfed by a master.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:05 No.4645100
    >>4645086
    >>4645086
    >>4645086
    >>4645086
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:05 No.4645101
    >>4645089
    >>4644983
    >>4644991

    Beardbeard.....heed these!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:05 No.4645102
    ...Well fuck.

    We could really use a One Winged Angel or something here. Didn't Xom say earlier he'd've preferred us to rule instead of Musclebeard?
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)03:05 No.4645109
         File :1243148746.png-(68 KB, 600x400, 27.png)
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    ...This can't be the end.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:06 No.4645117
    >>4645102
    >>4645086
    These these these! Every BBEG has a final form!
    >> Vector !NEy29ODpvs 05/24/09(Sun)03:06 No.4645120
    >>4645066
    He turns around to discover that the entire room has twisted around them because of Xom blood.
    >> Guardsman Ted 05/24/09(Sun)03:06 No.4645121
    >>4645109
    Xom is amused.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:07 No.4645130
    >>4645066
    Come on Beardbeard... this is the voices... pride...Pride...PRIDE!

    ARE YOU GOING TO LET THIS PUSSY TELL YOU WHAT IT MEANS TO BE A DORF? THINK US SUNSON, OF SUNBEARD! HE TALKS OF HONOR BUT WOULD LEAVE THEM UNAVENGED! YOU SHALL NOT LET HIS LIES AND SLANDER GO UNPUNISHED! PSYCHOPATHIC YOU MAY BE BUT YOU. ARE. A. DORF.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:07 No.4645140
    >>4645109
    Xom really enjoys his stretchy arms. I'm guessing Xom doesn't find Beardbeard's near death hilarious.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:08 No.4645149
    >>4645109
    Will his shoulder mutate too?
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)03:08 No.4645151
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    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:09 No.4645156
    >>4645151
    Hilarious.

    No really, I thought that was pretty funny.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:09 No.4645157
    Fuck these motivational speeches! This guy is a self-righteous jerk! It's like Pelor except with a beard. Fuck him! Get up and kick his ass you useless pile of guts and beard!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:09 No.4645163
    >>4645130
    THIS!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:10 No.4645175
    FUCK THIS SHIT.

    WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME ANYTHING FUCKING ENDED?

    KNOW WHAT THAT PAIN IS? WEAKNESS LEAVING THE BODY.

    SO WE'RE BASICALLY FUCKING PERFECTION RIGHT NOW.

    BESIDES, THE GM ISN'T A RAILROADING DICK. SO YOU'RE GOING TO BE GETTING UP REGARDLESS, MIGHT AS WELL DO IT NOW YOU PIECE OF SHIT BEFORE PEOPLE REALIZE THAT YOU GOT SURVIVED BY A FUCKING ELF.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:10 No.4645178
    >>4645163
    >>4645130

    This.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:11 No.4645184
    GET UP YOU BUM. DID YOU HEAR ANY FREAKIN' BELLS? NO? THEN GET THE FUCK UP, AND SHOW HIM YOUR PRIDE!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:11 No.4645186
    >>4645151
    Dohohoho. K, Beardbeard, get off your lazy dead ass, it's not your time to die yet.
    >> The Scribbler 05/24/09(Sun)03:13 No.4645215
         File :1243149202.jpg-(9 KB, 182x137, Michael wilson metal wolf.jpg)
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    BEARDBEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:13 No.4645217
    Now get the fuck up, Beardbeard. Or are you some kind of elven pussy who lets a dude with mousse in his beard kick his ass?
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)03:13 No.4645219
         File :1243149216.png-(37 KB, 600x400, 28.png)
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    "Get back down, you can barely stand."

    "P-pride."
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:13 No.4645220
    >>4645175
    >THE GM ISN'T A RAILROADING DICK

    While this is 100% true Gnome did say a few DorfQuests ago that he was trying to find a place to wrap things up. I'd like to be optimistic but it is theoretically possible that that place may be soon.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:14 No.4645233
    >>4645219
    Recall what we said when we rose from the dead the first time: "A good dorf never rests."
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:14 No.4645235
    >>4645220
    Yes he did say something about wrapping things up...FOR ALDWIN'S SIDE OF THE STORY! Mostly because it started having less and less to do with Beardbeard or Garrelf.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:14 No.4645236
    >>4645219
    YEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
    The grim reaper is too AFRAID to take you Beardbeard. Show him the DESTRUCTIVE qualities of DORF!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:15 No.4645237
    >>4644812
    I beg to differ

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdCrZfTkG1c&feature=related
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:15 No.4645246
    >>4645219
    There we go.
    >>4645220
    I think he just meant for Aldwin's stuff, but meh.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:15 No.4645251
    >>4645219

    WHAT'S THAT? I CAN'T HEAR YOU!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:15 No.4645252
    >>4645219
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YQ7xtdoxWJo
    BEAAARDDBEAAARD...
    >> The Scribbler 05/24/09(Sun)03:16 No.4645254
    >>4645219
    XOM WE NEED SOME ALE!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:16 No.4645260
    >>4645219
    For Sunson! For the memory of Sunbeard! For our Dorfiness! CHAAAAARGE!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:16 No.4645261
    >>4645219

    PRIDE
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:17 No.4645267
    No rest for the wicked, Beardbeard.

    Show this beard-groomer how wicked you really are.
    >> Vector !NEy29ODpvs 05/24/09(Sun)03:17 No.4645273
    LOOT EVERYTHING!!!!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:19 No.4645290
    FOR SUNBEARD
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)03:19 No.4645294
         File :1243149561.png-(69 KB, 600x400, 29.png)
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    "Will you just give up already?"

    "PRIDE! PRIDE! PRIDE!"
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:19 No.4645295
    Beardbeard might not be asking for help, but I will!

    HAAAAAALLLLPPPPP!!
    OUUEEEENNNNDDAAAANNNN!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:19 No.4645297
    >>4645294
    NEVER!
    >> Vector !NEy29ODpvs 05/24/09(Sun)03:19 No.4645299
    >>4645273
    Wait, I just realize that this might be a bade idea because Xom is still in the room.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:20 No.4645301
    FOR THAT MAGNIFICENT BUST
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:21 No.4645314
    >>4645301
    It seems Moradin doesn't understand the concept of pride. Maybe you could show him?
    >> The Scribbler 05/24/09(Sun)03:22 No.4645318
    We need some more Xom ale

    Heavy on the mutation
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:22 No.4645320
    UNFLINCHING.

    UNMOVING.

    DWARVEN STEADFASTNESS.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:23 No.4645333
    Bravery.
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)03:24 No.4645336
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    >> Teacup the Terrific 05/24/09(Sun)03:24 No.4645343
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    >>4645294
    >IS THAT REALLY ENOUGH FOR YOU?!
    >PRIDE!
    >IS THAT REALLY ENOUGH FOR YOU?
    >PRIDE!

    THATS WHAT I FUCKING THOUGHT.

    WIN OR LOSE. IT DOESN'T MATTER.

    IF NOTHING ELSE WE'LL LEAVE A SCAR SO DEEP THAT HE'LL REMEMBER WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE PRIDE!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:25 No.4645347
    >>4645336
    NOW STRIKE!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:25 No.4645348
    >>4645336
    BROFIST

    RIGHT FUCKING NOW!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:26 No.4645354
    >>4645336
    This is probably the longest cut scene you did so far.
    >> Vector !NEy29ODpvs 05/24/09(Sun)03:26 No.4645360
    >>4645336
    Musclebeard strikes you in the upper body!
    It Collapses into gore!
    Beardbeard's right lung is badly bruised!
    You are propelled by the force of the blow!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:26 No.4645361
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    >>4645336
    PRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
    IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
    DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
    EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:26 No.4645362
    >>4645314

    Moradin can't very well understand pride, until he's tasted of its reciprocal.

    Teach him shame, Beardbeard.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:26 No.4645364
    >>4645336

    PRIDEFIST AT HIS FIST
    >> Guardsman Ted 05/24/09(Sun)03:27 No.4645369
    No more talking. Break the walls.
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)03:27 No.4645373
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    >>4645348
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:27 No.4645374
    You hit the Dwarfgod with your fists
    He is moderately wounded
    You hit the Dwarfgod with your fists
    He is moderately wounded
    The Dwarfgod hits you with his beard
    You die...
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:28 No.4645381
    >>4645348
    YES! BROFIST WITH HIM WITH EVERYTHING WE'VE GOT.

    GIVE HIM A BROFIST THAT COULD LEVEL MOUNTAINS!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:28 No.4645385
    >>4645369
    Break the walls, break the mountains, break the world, the sky, and its surly bonds.

    Break everything upon the cliffs of your pride, Beardbeard.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:28 No.4645387
    >>4645373
    Well this is a weird twist.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:29 No.4645389
    >>4645373
    Most powerful brofist ever.
    Just watch his arm disintegrate into a fine pink mist.
    Do it.
    >> Vector !NEy29ODpvs 05/24/09(Sun)03:29 No.4645399
    Combine with Musclebeard, then kill and combine with Xom, then go kill satan and combine with him too.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:30 No.4645401
    >>4645373
    Make your mutated hand eat him! Become the new dwarf god!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:31 No.4645407
    >>4645373
    Don't Brofist too hard or you'll level Buzzardloved.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:31 No.4645410
    We need nothing but the brofist!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:31 No.4645413
    >go kill satan
    Erm ya about him....
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:32 No.4645415
    >>4645373
    THIS IS THE GREATEST MOMENT IN MY ENTIRE LIFE
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)03:32 No.4645418
         File :1243150363.png-(59 KB, 600x400, 31.png)
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    >> The Scribbler 05/24/09(Sun)03:33 No.4645421
         File :1243150392.jpg-(189 KB, 550x412, metal wolf.jpg)
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    >>4645418
    HOW DO YOU LIKE ME NOW!?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:33 No.4645430
    >>4645418

    ROW ROW, FIGHT 'DA DORFGOD
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:33 No.4645432
    >>4645418
    TAKE HIS EYE. USE IT TO REPLACE YOUR EYE.
    IT IS NOW YOUR EYE.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:34 No.4645433
    >>4645418
    FUCK YES! RIP HIM A NEW ONE!

    Once you realize he's a god, take his divine essence for yourself.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:34 No.4645434
    >>4645418
    A sucker punch? Dick move, Beardbeard.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:34 No.4645435
    Pride is the root of all.
    There is no Craft without Pride, only making stuff.
    There is no honor without Pride, only rules.
    There is no ale without pride, only alcohol.
    There is no beard without Pride, only facial hair.

    Without Pride you are not a Dorf. With Pride... you can do anything.
    >> The Scribbler 05/24/09(Sun)03:37 No.4645459
         File :1243150675.gif-(105 KB, 300x225, applause.gif)
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    >>4645435
    >> Teacup the Terrific 05/24/09(Sun)03:38 No.4645473
         File :1243150732.png-(68 KB, 269x250, ale and whores.png)
    68 KB
    After we attain godhood, we shall...
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)03:39 No.4645476
         File :1243150743.png-(45 KB, 600x400, 32.png)
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    "YOU ASSHOLE! BASTARD! I WILL TEAR YOU LIMB FROM LIMB!"

    Beardbeard cleverly dodges by collapsing to the floor unconscious.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:39 No.4645477
         File :1243150744.gif-(32 KB, 160x120, th_Clapping-MontyPythonApplaus(...).gif)
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    >>4645435
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:39 No.4645483
    >>4645476
    Well, I guess we better hope we did enough.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:40 No.4645490
    >>4645476
    Wait, What?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:40 No.4645492
    >>4645476
    Yeah, good luck doing that while being blind as a bat ol' boy.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:40 No.4645501
    >>4645476
    He can't start tearing us limb from limb while we're unconscious. That'd be dishonourable.

    That said, STAND UP FUCKER!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:41 No.4645504
    >>4645476
    >Beardbeard cleverly dodges by collapsing to the floor unconscious.

    Heh, good show Beardbeard. Hopefully he'll just flail around blindly until you wake up.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:41 No.4645505
    >>4645476
    Well shit. Xom is amused?
    >> Vector !NEy29ODpvs 05/24/09(Sun)03:42 No.4645517
    So we have two incapacitated dorfs who are both as strong as gods in the same room with Xom. Good job guys.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:43 No.4645527
    >>4645517
    COMBINE THEM! They will be UNSTOPPABLE!
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)03:45 No.4645542
         File :1243151133.png-(30 KB, 600x400, 33.png)
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    Xom finds this hilarious!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:45 No.4645545
    Can we use our session power while unconscious?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:46 No.4645552
    We have humiliated Musclebeard and shown him our pride.

    This is satisfactory.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:46 No.4645562
    >>4645542
    So do I.

    >>4645545
    Can't see why not.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:47 No.4645564
    >>4645545
    We already have except for LOOT EVERYTHING
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:47 No.4645567
    >>4645542
    I'm at a loss of what else we can do now. Anyone have ideas?
    >> Vector !NEy29ODpvs 05/24/09(Sun)03:47 No.4645568
    >>4645542
    I don't see darkness, therefore we must be in control of Xom currently. Combine them with your awesome chaos powers, or maybe turn one of them into a choko.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:47 No.4645569
    >>4645542
    Yeah, I'll bet.
    >> Guardsman Ted 05/24/09(Sun)03:48 No.4645575
    >>4645552
    Shown?
    DO YOU THINK THIS WAS JUST A SHOW?
    FUCK NO.
    WE JUST TOOK HIS SIGHT. FOREVER.
    THE LAST THING HE EVER SAW WAS OUR PRIDE.
    BEARDBEARD FUCK YEAH.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:48 No.4645577
    Xom has transformed your beard into a dragon!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:48 No.4645580
    >>4645568
    We're the mind of Xom?

    Oh god I fear for my sanity.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:49 No.4645583
    >>4645562
    We've already used Deforestation and Beard/Ale/Axe/Pride, all we have left is Loot Everything. Can we Loot Consciousness and Vitality?
    >> Vector !NEy29ODpvs 05/24/09(Sun)03:49 No.4645588
    >>4645575
    Actually, musclebeard could get his eye healed back. The only reason we can't get our eye back is because it is a xom mutation and cannot be undone by not xom.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:49 No.4645589
    >>4645575
    With a sucker punch, man. Attacking someone during a brofist is serious violation of the brocode.
    >> Guardsman Ted 05/24/09(Sun)03:50 No.4645593
    >>4645588
    Magic shenanaigans aside.
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)03:52 No.4645605
         File :1243151534.png-(37 KB, 600x400, pause.png)
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    PAUSE SCREEN
    BEARDBEARD GODSLAYER, Dorfen Berserker
    Current Quest(s): Conquer Region

    ALCOHOLISM: almost sober
    GOLD: 19,725

    STATUS: BBEG

    MUTATIONS:
    Vestigial Wings
    No Left Eye
    3rd eye on back
    What Hands?
    One Breath
    Poison Immunity
    Scales
    Twoface

    INVENTORY:
    Iron Axe
    +8/+10 Two Handed Axe of the Pit
    1 Torch
    Overworld Map
    Hydra Armor
    Stone of Ionus
    Wooden Leg
    Map to Beardbeard's Kingdom
    Golden Sceptre
    Antimagic Bird Cage
    Dragon Armor
    Axfoot
    Silk Cape

    Party:
    >> Vector !NEy29ODpvs 05/24/09(Sun)03:53 No.4645613
    >>4645589
    A follower of Xom, especially a chaotic EVIL one against a clearly stronger enemy, should not be expected to fight fairly.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:53 No.4645620
    >>4645605
    Wait didn't Musclebeard destroy the axefoot?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:53 No.4645622
    >Twoface

    >What Hands?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:53 No.4645623
    >>4645589

    Not if the Fistee had previously committed an egregious party-foul.

    Cockblocking your kingdom is about the most egregious party-foul I can conceive, so the brofist was not governed under Brocode until the comittee performed, or had performed upon him, appropriate atonement.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:54 No.4645625
    Well....we might not have killed him, but we certainly pulled a "Did you just punch out Cthulu?" there.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:54 No.4645630
    >>4645605
    No longer have Stone of Ionus OR axefoot.
    >> Vector !NEy29ODpvs 05/24/09(Sun)03:54 No.4645631
    >>4645605
    What about Musclebeard's eye? Also, when did we use the two breathe I forgot.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:54 No.4645633
    >>4645620
    Beardbeard still has part of his axefoot left, it just kindof useless.
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)03:54 No.4645634
         File :1243151688.png-(72 KB, 600x400, notpride.png)
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    and now for Super Happy Fun Doodle Time.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:55 No.4645641
    >>4645605
    I think you could have waited for a couple moments more. At least until we've regained our kingdom or something.

    But eh. Good session this was.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:55 No.4645645
    Didn't he lose the Stone of Ionus?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:56 No.4645646
    >>4645634
    I want to see some more Pride stuff. Few posts that were quite epic use one of them. I can't write that sort of stuff.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:56 No.4645653
    >>4645623
    Beardbeard wasn't being a bro to his fellow dwarfs man.

    The brofist was probably perceived as an act of redemption and reconcilliation between two MANLY dwarfs. In the time Moradin thought that everything would work out fine he GOT HIS EYE RIPPED OUT.

    Beardbeard's always been extremely upfront with his violence. This is the first time he has done something like this.
    >> Vector !NEy29ODpvs 05/24/09(Sun)03:57 No.4645657
    Where did the apple that killed tree dorf land?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)03:57 No.4645660
    >>4645645

    Disarmed. It's somewhere.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:00 No.4645680
    >>4645660

    In a mountain? It's probably been carving a path straight down from where it fell, and is halfway to the molten center of the world.
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)04:01 No.4645690
         File :1243152062.png-(79 KB, 600x1200, He did it.png)
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    >>4645630
    Forgot to drop the stone of Ionus, thanks.

    >>4645657
    It didn't. It shot in a perfectly straight trajectory, left the atmosphere, and is just now passing Jupiter.

    >>4645653
    >This is the first time he has done something like this.

    You sir, are made of LIES.
    >> Vector !NEy29ODpvs 05/24/09(Sun)04:03 No.4645710
    >>4645690
    >It shot in a perfectly straight trajectory, left the atmosphere, and is just now passing Jupiter.
    I wonder what will happen to it if it keeps goi-
    *CLANG*
    WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:03 No.4645715
    I suggest... Goldmoon getting a massage or something to make her relax. Maybe from Coco.
    >> LD !1BMAxzsKgU 05/24/09(Sun)04:04 No.4645717
         File :1243152248.png-(54 KB, 381x460, MsgPlus_Img2303.png)
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    Totally Garrelf and Xom.
    >> Vector !NEy29ODpvs 05/24/09(Sun)04:05 No.4645724
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    What was Coco working on?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:05 No.4645725
    >>4645690
    We didn't break their guard at all.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:05 No.4645727
    Was this whole session just a metaphor to explain the inner workings of Beardbeard? How he had to choose between KAY-OS and DORF?

    WAS IT?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:05 No.4645730
    >>4645717
    What is this I don't even
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:06 No.4645732
    >>4645690
    Woah, the art sure was bad back then.
    >> Teacup the Terrific 05/24/09(Sun)04:08 No.4645753
         File :1243152533.jpg-(28 KB, 418x396, 1238502869369.jpg)
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    Honestly.

    All this OH NOES THE BROCODE is fucking hilarious.

    It isn't that big of a deal. Either it was a dirty trick(and beardbeard has done that countless times), or it was not an actual bro fist. It looked more like a fist GRAB to me to disable one of the god's hands and catch him by surprise.

    Even if it was dirty, I don't give a damn. OH NO YOU CAN'T DO THAT IN A LIFE OR DEATH BATTLE. Why the fuck not? You can't afford to pull punches when your life is on the line. Hell, worse. Beardbeard's pride was on the line. He might as well be dead if he lost that. He'd be a broken dwarf. An irreparable collection of mutation and uselessness.

    Honestly. Sounds like samurai wank honor code level stuff to me. "Don't actually use any techniques I'm not good enough to defeat or you are dishonorable scum!"

    Please.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:09 No.4645758
    We tried to rely on Xom.

    Xom failed us, but we managed to blind a god with dwarven pride.

    That shows exactly where Beardbeard's true colors lie.
    >> Teacup the Terrific 05/24/09(Sun)04:12 No.4645774
    >>4645717
    Female Garrelf..?

    Saved..
    >> Vector !NEy29ODpvs 05/24/09(Sun)04:12 No.4645776
    Autosaging
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)04:12 No.4645777
         File :1243152747.png-(32 KB, 600x400, transformer.png)
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    >>4645724
    He was making this. By pulling the string on the tree, it flipped inside out into a Dorf. The world's first Transformer, if you will.

    Getting it to turn back into a tree is a very difficult process, however.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:13 No.4645782
    >>4645777
    Wow, Coco sure is a skilled craftsman...craftsthing.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:13 No.4645783
    >>4645758
    you kiddin' me? Xom helped. he gave us axes. he distracted the god while we get up.

    That's all a god really does for its worshippers- helps here and there, provides a little bit of serendipity.
    >> Teacup the Terrific 05/24/09(Sun)04:14 No.4645792
    >>4645758
    >That shows exactly where Beardbeard's true colors lie.

    For all his psychopathic stunts, you have to admire him.

    At the core he is a good guy. He'll move heaven and earth to fulfill a promise. He'll fuck the world to save you if he calls you friend(then go on another epic quest to unfuck the world). He may go off to do stupid shit, but he isn't the kind of guy that'll let you down. Ever.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:17 No.4645805
    >>4645792

    So.... Beardbeard is lawfulchaotic?

    He cares little for this good and evil thing. He balances himself between a fine line of deeply ingrained personal code, and a personality which is best described as "Spin the wheel of chaos, see if you butcher the child or give her a gold coin"
    >> Vector !NEy29ODpvs 05/24/09(Sun)04:18 No.4645814
    >>4645805
    >Spin the wheel of chaos, see if you butcher the child or give her a gold coin
    He does both.
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)04:19 No.4645827
         File :1243153196.png-(28 KB, 600x400, Coco massage.png)
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    >>4645715
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:20 No.4645831
    >>4645805
    Technically, he wouldn't butcher the child regardless...unless she kicked the wheel and laughed at him.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:20 No.4645834
    >>4645827
    Paralyzing touch is a bitch.
    >> Vector !NEy29ODpvs 05/24/09(Sun)04:20 No.4645835
    >>4645827
    Don't Liches have the touch of death?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:21 No.4645845
    >>4645831
    Or if it was an Elf
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:22 No.4645846
    For fun imagetime, I suggest checking up on Satan-djinn.
    >> Teacup the Terrific 05/24/09(Sun)04:23 No.4645854
    >>4645805
    NO IDEA.

    DnD Gods of /tg/: What alignment would you be if you did whatever the fuck you wanted.. the ONLY exception being never letting your friends down?

    Beardbeard is a lot of things, but he isn't going to dick over a pal.
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)04:25 No.4645867
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    >> Teacup the Terrific 05/24/09(Sun)04:26 No.4645878
    >>4645867
    PRAISE THE LOYAL BARD.

    Friendship is rewarded with friendship. Beardbeard at least knows this much. It pays to have someone you can count on.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:27 No.4645882
    >>4645867
    Thank god for Presley. We'll need him for the montage so we can extract revenge.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:30 No.4645903
    >>4645867
    Presley is such a cool guy. I always thought that all Shadar-Kai were assholes like Garrelf.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:31 No.4645908
    >>4645903
    Only most of them.
    >> Vector !NEy29ODpvs 05/24/09(Sun)04:31 No.4645909
    >>4645903
    Garrelf was originally an elf though.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:31 No.4645912
    >>4645867
    Fuck this.

    Beardbeard is monotheistic.

    And since he is NEVER wrong, our quest is now to kill every other god out there. Except maybe Satan. But he's no longer cool with us.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:32 No.4645918
    >>4645912
    Uh i think you mean ESPECIALLY Satan, since the fucker caused the death of Sunbeard in the first place (which meant we had to go and bring him back, which lead to Musclebeard assuming command over out kingdom and this very fight)
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)04:32 No.4645920
         File :1243153970.png-(114 KB, 600x400, ves mos sinta res.png)
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    >>IRC
    >One Winged Angel Beardbeard
    >> Teacup the Terrific 05/24/09(Sun)04:38 No.4645951
    >>4645920
    ...It is made of nightmares.

    Nightmares and Pride.
    >> Gnome !94Ud9yTfxQ 05/24/09(Sun)04:43 No.4645986
         File :1243154613.png-(139 KB, 600x400, speech therapy.png)
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    >>4645846
    >Satan/Djinn
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:46 No.4646006
    You know, at this rate, if Xom keeps helping us Beardbeard is going to end like a mutated, amorphous blob.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)04:56 No.4646046
    >>4646006
    Ever played ADOM? That's how it always ends.
    >> Teacup the Terrific 05/24/09(Sun)05:00 No.4646074
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    >>4646006
    >> Anonymous 05/24/09(Sun)05:01 No.4646083
         File :1243155715.jpg-(115 KB, 500x343, 2475927505_24846c41a7.jpg)
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    >>4646074



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