That's terrifying, my Lich's phylactery is an enchanted cistern.

If that seems useless or nearly useless to you then you've obviously never traveled.

The BBEG locks himself in his bathroom. PC unlocks it with key.

The Wand of Self-Disintegration.

eggs of self-flipping.

The Die of Misunderstood Large Numbers : After 999 rolls, rolling this die again will have the effect of obtaining a 3.5 result.

The Socks of Never Mismatch: This pair of socks is enchanted: after you put one on, the sock you put on your other foot becomes of the exact fabric, quality and color of the enchanted one, until it is removed.

The Swiss Magic Halberd: This magic device will allow you to conjure a stainless steel halberd 10cm long.

>>4657088
INFINITE TINY HALBERDS

Metamagic Rod of Minimize Spell
All random numerical effects of a spell modified with this rod are reduced to their minimum possible result.

Returning grenades +5

>>4657064
>The Wand of Self-Disintegration.

My DM got one of my party members to trade a salesman this ancient orb for a Wand of Disintegration, that when used, disintegrated itself.

>The Wand of Self-Disintegration.

So much potential...

>>4657095

No, just one, in place of the enchanted item. I thought that the pun on the "Swiss army knife" was quite obvious.

Ring of Polydwarf Self
on activation, transforms the user into a number of dwarven duplicates of equal mass. For a human, this comes out as one dwarf or so. A great wyrm, several dozen dwarves. For a halfling, a third of a dwarf.

The Eybrows Growth Potion: Driking this potion will lengthen your eyebrows. Useful for alchemists.

>>4657047
That would be an incredibly useful item in FATAL, as long as you could hold onto the thing without dropping it and an eyeball falling out. Of your ear.

>>4657111
But that's an AWESOME item.

>>4657133
Awesome, but useless, as /tg/'s belief in their awesome is the only good thing about dwarves.

Ring of invisibility, you put it on and the ring goes invisible.

>>4657047
>>4657064

I'm using this. Introducing the key as early and mudanely as possible like a side quest.
What they don't know is the BBEG has IBS and halfway through the final battle he runs off to the toilet, the doors are reinforced and the lock is magical.
If they discarded or kept it it would be an awesome ending.

Immovable Rod.

When activated it stops moving. Entirely.

>>4657161
So, to us, it would go flying off somewhere.

>>4657161
Oh god let's not get into this argument again.

>>4657161
Congratulations, you've found Absolute Zero.

>>4657140
Still seems pretty damn useful to me.

>>4657133
for those who have more mass than the average adult dwarf, it's not that bad.

Imagine putting on a magic item and finding you suddenly have a beard, but no feet.

>>4657161

The Movable Rod.

When activated, it moves.

Exalted has tone of items like this. A pen that never runs out of ink, a tube that turns into a variety of mundane but useful tools, a collar that keeps you clean and presentable.

More, though? Hmm.

A toothbrush that cleans perfectly, even restoring the minor damage of scratches and chipping. And it works on things that aren't teeth... though it is still just a toothbrush, with normal scrubbing action required.

A shield that only blocks projectile weapons.

An arrow that will fly straight and true to the closest ass that isn't the user's.

Bread knife: A knife made from bread. Inflicts massive damage on food golems, but is otherwise useless except as a snack.

Seal Clubbing Club

This club is perfect for clubbing powerful seals.

Unfortunately, this plane's seals are lovable furry mammals who mainly stay in the water.

CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? CLANG! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!?

Wand of Self-Recall

When used will teleport the user to the user's place.

>>4657161
*CLANG*

What the fuck was THAT?

>>4657047

USELESS?

Dude, when every other loo is a goddamn 3rd world shithole and the only clean one is a LOCKED executive restroom, that key is a fucking godsend.

>>4657213
Or would teletransport the wand. Just the wand.

Inverted immovable rod. When activated, it stops the movement of everything in the universe except itself.

Ring of Foreign Currency: This ring transforms all currency you have into useless foreign currency.

>>4657250
OH SHI-

If it doesn't give combat bonuses, its a useless magic item. You wanna spent 50,000gp for a fucking bathroom break? You knock yourself out, faggot.

A goblet that will cause any liquid put in it to heat to boiling, or freeze solid. There is no way to tell which it will do at any given moment. Has no effect on solids.

>>4657262
shut up 4thed we dont like you anymore

>>4657262
>I hate people having fun doing anything other than KILL MAIM BURN hurf durf

>>4657262
That assumes you paid for it. You could've found it, or "found it".

>>4657270
4th ed? Fuck you faggot, I'm a threeaboo. Magic items are fucking expensive, and why the fuck should I spent XP and fucktons of gold when I could just cast fucking KNOCK

Pepper Mace: A cumbersome and heavy steel mace, that on hit with an enemy dissolves in a spray of pepper dust, only to be returned whole at the end of the round.

>>4657295
oh so your just a powergaming fag who is in the system where he can do the most damage.

good luck anon

Lute of infinite Ice Cream.
When you play it you get ice cream.

>>4657335
Well that was another, sticky situation

Wand of Create self.

When used this wand will create another of it's kind in the same exact condition as it was during use with as many charges it had before being used, then it will disintegrate in the user's hand.

Charges: 1

(If this wand is broken an endless cycle of wands breaking themselves over and over, potentially draining all the magic out of the world)

>>4657295
You're just not thinking hard enough.

For example, if you come up to a mansion's warded door that is resistant to magical and nonmagical entry, simply throw a toilet through the window.
Bam, it's a bathroom.

>>4657335
An infinite amount of ice-cream?

I think I've found my next campaign.

ARE YOU A BAD ENOUGH DUDE TO SAVE THE WORLD FROM ICE-CREAM?

>>4657312

Cook here, you have no idea how useful that would be.

>>4657338
YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

Accidentally A Hole
A portable hole. Roll 1d20 every round. On a 1 it opens and eats a verb.

The Lute of Lewding: When you play it, you look like a pervy old man.

>>4657345
That wouldn't fly for me. The presence of an unattached toilet does not a bathroom make.

For me, you'd have to use a bath so that it is technically, a bath room.

>>4657345
It says on the label it only works on bathrooms with functional plumbing.

>>4657356
i think this should be built as a new /tg/ wordfilter

>>4657371
I see. Then you could just throw the bathtub in there. That would work. Go inside any door, anywhere! Teleport a bathtub into a room, gain entry.

A small glass pitcher that will burst a large hole in any masonry wall close to it.

It will do this whether you want it to or not.

>>4657131
Psh, in FATAL you don't use bathrooms. You gotta save that shit up to pee 15 meters at the BBEG. Who is a rapist. Your rival rapist, everyone is a rapist.

>>4657395
Why would you even expose your penis to the BBEG in FATAL? He will crawl up your urethra, bite down and make your intestines fall out of the resulting wound.

>>4657356

From dialogue or would it actually affect your action? Like, if you wanted to go down a road, look around and then draw your sword, it would eat one of those verbs and thus change how you act?

>>4657404
Oh god that is a terrible image. But I think you are underestimating the amount of pee here. Its a god damn firehose, hes not gonna be able to move.

>>4657345
Or you climb through the hole you made by throwing the toilet inside

>>4657047
Hm. Would the cursed version automatically unlock the bathroom you're trying to use at the moment?

>>4657295
Fine, don't spend money on magic items or waste xp. No ones telling you to. But we are telling you to fuck off cause you're an immense cock faggot.

>>4657465
I think the cursed version would prevent access to every bathroom you encountered and since it's cursed, you can't remove it from your person.

>>4657472
I'm not sure what you're saying here.

Is he a faggot for cocks or a cock who is a faggot?

>>4657395
I lol'd.

>>4657482
It's whatever you want it to be, I left it open for interpretation depending on what you think is funnier.

Amulet of Practical immortality.

When worn, this Amulet kills off the user 20 seconds upon putting it on, and then resurrects them 20 seconds later. the user will lose all his memories prior to the amulet when the user is resurrected. If the user dies whilst alive, he will simply return to the world of the living 20 seconds later. This item cannot be thieved conventionally as it injects a barb into the victim and releasing the barb at any time will kill off the victim. if the Amulet breaks, it will simply repair itself.

>>4657493
So this is like a Choose Your Own Adventure book?

I place my finger here and flick to both answers.

Scrying Sphere of Incorrect Gossip: This sphere allows the caster to scry at a location, but most of the sound is unintelligible, and the image is seen as from a great distance. In addition, it works only as long it involves a famous bard, a royal family member, a prostitute or a drug dealer.

>>4657510
Exactly.

An incredibly horny magic sword that is a pacifist.

Spaghetti Guitar +3

A seemingly great looking mandolin, but once a successful perform check is rolled, the strings slowly turn into spaghetti, and let out a horrible screeching noise as they are played. The noise will not stop, even after the player has finished playing.

The only way to stop the screaming guitar is to shout out "OH NOOOO SPAGHETTI GUITAAAR!"

A torch that never runs out when exposed to natural light.

Infinite sandwhich: A sandwich that never goes away, no matter how much you eat. It still goes bad with time, though.

>>4657678
Also, the sandwhich never quite satisfies hunger, at first you think it's filling you up but in a few minutes your hungry again.

Toilet paper of death - a roll of toilet paper with very sharp edges, and the Rune of Slaying on it.

Arrows of returning - arrows that return, immediately when fired.

Staff of lightning - a staff made from 6 feet of lightning.

>>4657657

Solar powered torch?

The cursed ring, this ring is a tiny bit too small for your finger, once you manage to squeeze it on, it will never come off.

Potion of Greater Lesbianism

>>4657678

But what if you eat the sandwich.... whole?

>>4657810
I'm putting this in my next campaign.

>>4657810
I call BS on that being useless.

In every campaign, I always hide a single corpal spork. No one has ever found it in any of my games though. My PCs are usually too buay falling into obvious traps or killing friendly NPCs

>>4657871

vorpal spork*

>>4657657
You could cook above it...

>>4657810
psh that will likely result in unshaved pits, man hating, bad poetry, and way too much flannel

I'd rather invest in potions of lipstick quasi bisexual lesbianism, pour them into some sort of supersoaker type mechanism and go to town.

Arrows of returning, or Boomerang Arrows

>>4657512
Very useful. Want to weed out who is selling all the kids meth?

Start scrying all the rooms in the town. When it finally works, break down the door and arrest everyone.

Warning: Will not work if the royal family is in on it.

Indestructible Permanent Locking Casket of Eternal Life

>>4658065
using magic to stop meth dealers doesn't make sense.

but on meth it does

Inverse mood ring.

Your mood doesn't change the color of the ring, the ring's color determine's yours, pretty much at random.

Magical Ring of Doubt, when you put it on it feels like an ordinary mundane ring.

The effect is subtle

>>4658121

>>4658119

That could actually help me IRL. Hard-counter to split personality.

>>4657345
I would prefer it if the key was like the one in the lost room. Whichever door you open with it is the bathroom.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Lost_Room

Knife of Selective Existence
A knife that can only touch something that's thinking about it. Inanimate objects or sneak attack victims, it passes right through.

>>4658201
>inanimate objects
>armor

>>4658201

Oh god that guy has a knife and definitely wants to kill me!!!! Good thing I am behind this BLAHGRAGSDED.......

>>4658201
THIS is the single most fucking useful thing my halfling assassin would ever need.

Armour, not a problem.
The only glitch is they have to think about it but then, you coul always let the pray get a brief glimpse of the blade before it passes through their unthinking armour and clothing to sever the spinal cord.

>>4658227
HAI LOOK I HAVE A KNIFE
Enemy: Haha, your knife is no match for my powerarmoHNGGGHH

>>4658151
Honestly, my group is doing a full database of what items from the room could do and we are running a D20 Modern SPC style game centered around The Lost Room.

gloves of water walking. you have to walk on your hands.

>>4657505
Wait a minute...is that the Crucible-parasite from Hyperion?

>>4657934
>psh that will likely result in unshaved pits, man hating, bad poetry, and way too much flannel

No no no. That's a potion of Mundane Lesbianism. A potion of GREATER Lesbianism turns women into hot busty versions of themselves who don't mind making out in front of people.

Makes for an incredibly good distraction.

Maybe TOO good.

The cloak of invisibility: the cloak that makes you invisible when nobody is looking.

Ring of Reverse Telepathy.
Once you put it on you cannot take it off. It screams out your every thought. Really, really loud.

>>4658366
Somehow I get the feeling this thing is listed somewhere in FATAL's item lists.

>>4658366
ok, then i load that into a supersoaker instead

>>4657775
sneak the TP into BBEG's toilet and wait.
For the knife thingy: backstab, the knife would pass right through, the guy will now see a knife sticking out of him, turn the knife the other way and pull.

>>4657064
hey the wand of self-disintegration is a kickass trap item.

BBEG: GIVE ME THE KEY TO THE FORGOTTEN PALACE
PC: Okay god just don't kill me, here (gives wand)
BBEG: BWAHAHA (kills self)

Wand with 1 charge of Dirk's Impressive Tool

>>4658488
wand doesn't disintigrate user, it disintigrates itself

>>4657047
Could you just declare a room a bathroom?
"Man I really have to go #2. Too bad the only suitable room is that locked one over there. Oh, hai, I have this key! And because I will poo there, it is a bathroom!"

>>4658488

I believe the Wand of Self-Disintegration just disintegrates itself.

>>4658552
That's up to the DM and how much $$ you pass him under the table.

>>4658552
Makes sense to me.

>>4658390
>The cloak of invisibility: the cloak that makes you invisible when nobody is looking.

Since no one can look at you when you're invisible, I don't see the problem here. You just have to be out-of-sight when you put it on.

>>4658712
looking =/= can't see

I can look at a Magic Eye picture, but that doesn't mean I'll be able to see that damn thing everyone talks about.

Furry Suit of Rage.
Wear suit. Become center of rage.

Wand of Disintegration. When activated, it turns itself to ash. It has 99 charges, but does not reform itself after use.

>>4658739

"And brother, when it disintegrates, it DISINTEGRATES."

"Oh. What'ya know. It...disintegrated."

>>4658552

Or, the key can be paired with a wand of summon toilet. The end of the want is very thin, allowing it to be slid in a keyhole.

>>4657047

we talk again when you are have your most terrible diarrhea and the janitor locked the bathroom due to "continous shitting in the urinals".

The Box of Liquid Destruction.

Anything placed within the box has all the liquid it contains destroyed.

A pair of gloves that conjures a perfect sheet of white paper every time you clap your hands.

Actually, that sounds awesome.

>>4658151
I wish that had done well enough to warrant a full series. Now we have to deal with more GIANT ANIMAL movies from Sci-fi (or is it SyFy now?).

I can find uses for a lot of these items.
>>4657111
Instant disguise. For larger creatures, there's a lot you can do with a whole lot of bodies in your control.
>>4657213
Can be used as a signal, message carrier, etc. If it teleports the user, too, then battles will never again be dangerous. Don't like where it's headed? Don't be there.
>>4657257
Turn 10 of my coppers into 10000 Schmeks? Sure! Fuck yeah, huge source of metal or pile of coins for INSTASTAIRS.
>>4657267
You can use this to crack things wide open through use of thermal expansion/contraction. Also, boil your soup. Even if it becomes ice, you can keep trying (even with the same batch of soup if you thaw it first.)
>>4657335
Seriously, man. Infinite amounts of anything will break a game in two.
>>4657312
Distractions, magic tricks, etc. What happens when some of the pepper gets in an enemy nose? Logically, one of two things [1] the pepper teleports out to reform (Try some detect magic on invisible enemies!) or [2] suddenly, maceface.

Plus, scattered pepper acts like any other scattered powder. It helps with detecting invisible or hiding enemies. Pepper can also be used to wake up comrades quickly or can be thrown in enemy faces to make them pretty dang useless.
>>4657505
I completely fail to see how this is useless.

>>4659003
>cont'd
>>4657512
Pretty good for finding those subsets of people. Want to know where the secret bard festival is? The royal caravan? Perhaps the prostitution hideout? Wow! It's even a distance view so you can spot landmarks!
>>4657583
My bard could start a whole fad with this thing.
>>4658066
[1] Enchant a magic item so powerful that its destruction would cause utter ruin for a large group of people. For example, create a medallion that projects an epic-level Sanctuary or anything that deals massive damage to evil creatures or something.
[2] Put it on a dying man who won't know the difference, or someone chosen to be the Keeper, or a powerful mage that can function inside a locked box anyway.
[3] Close the person with the object in the casket. Congrats, you now have an invulnerable item of untold power forevermore.
>>4658201
Completely insane assassin item. Slip it in, bump them with the handguard, and reveal yourself with "there's a knife in your spine."
>>4657678
Feast in your hand.
>>4657966
Perfect sabotage or trap item.
>>4658736
Perfect distraction item.

>>4658977
Make a papermancer. Enjoy having unlimited knives.

>>4658966
Dehydrated food lasts a fucklong time and weighs far less.
>>4658977
Paper is hard to come by. Pure white paper is really hard to come by. Hello, fortune.

>>4657267

Step 1: Pour water in until it starts boiling.
Step 2: Put some meat cutlets, vegetables, and a pinch of salt in boiling mixture
Step 3: Pour soup into bowl
Step 4: ???
Step 5: OH GOD TROLLS SMELLED THE FOOD

All of you are babbies. Useless magic items? BAH!

>>4658966
That would solve a lot of the bathroom issues floating through this thread.

>>4659075
DIARRHEA POOPS? HA!
SHIT-IN-A-BOX
YOU SHIT IN THE BOX
NO SPLATTER
DUMP OUT THE LUMPS
DUMP THOSE LUMPS!

IT'S SHIT-IN-A-BOX!

rolled 622553127 = 622553127

>>4659105
I just imagined this with an asian saying all that. Super hilarious!

Nearly useless magical items are the best!

Coming up with all kinds of surprising uses for them is awesome.

Ring of Lesser Disguises
Have you ever wanted to walk into a Opium Den undetected? How about NOT sullying your reputation when purchasing lewd statues? Then this ring is not for you.

When worn the Ring of Lesser Disguises will (through the Mann Co's patented use of Magic, Technology, and PURE TESTOSTERONE) polymorph your hands into the hands of someone else AT RANDOM! This effect lasts until 1d37 years from the point the ring is removed, putting on the ring a second time does nothing.

rolled 742996692 = 742996692

>>4659144
If your finger prints are already on file....

>>4659156
This is true. All near-useless items should have a potential to be (lightly) broken.

>>4658966
Can't you put that on someones head to kill them?

Pendulum of infinite motion.

A device of 100% energy efficiency; it never slows down or speeds up. Breaking the outer plastic seal breaks the device.

The Crossbow of Planet Slaying.

This crossbow will automatically direct its bolts to the nearest planet-sized object, and it always hits causing critical damage.

Does not come with supporting Planet Slaying Bolts.

Deck of Very Few Things
A deck of cards that, when touched, produces a mundane magic at random. Potential magics include:
conjuration of flowers, birds, rabbits, or small bursts of fire.
Single moment of telepathy between user and single target... only if user has asked target to thing of a particular type of thought. (Mother's maiden name, type of animal)
Other parlor tricks.

>>4659194
I like this. I'm not even going to try to break it through perpetual motion machines, it's just going to power my Grandfather Clock of Perfected Timekeeping.

>>4659183
The entire object must be in the box. Since the head is still attached...

>>4657583
>>4657161
>>4657226
>>4657352


I love this thread so hard.

>>4659221
>Does not come with supporting Planet Slaying Bolts.
>Ranged weapons do not enchant their ammunition
wat

>>4659050
HOW IS BABBY FORMED?

HOW GIRL GET PRAGNANT?

>>4659306
>Ranged weapon not enchanting ammunition.
Maybe it's enchanted to use any crossbow bolt? And it has lore referencing planet slaying crossbow bolts.

>>4659306
>>4659330
Just because the crossbow is making it so the bolts always hit a planet for critical damage doesn't mean the damage exceeds the planet's hardness. Planet Slaying Bolts on the other hand...

Sash of civilizations: A multicolored sash

>>4659355
>Multicolor sash?
Pic related?

>>4659383
No.

>>4659194
>it never slows down or speeds up
So if I put my hand in front of it, it would stay at the exact same speed? Doesn't that mean it would need infinite mass/density? That seems bad.

A friend of mine once gave one of his PCs a sword that, when waved, conjured cupcakes out of midair. He couldn't eat them, though. To anyone else, they were delicious. To him, they were poisonous.

I remember in one of these threads, someone wrote about a cursed book.

It's a normal looking book, but with seemingly infinite blank pages. Once the PC picks it up, he will have to start making will saves every now and then (usually during any type of event, aka almost always). If the PC fails said save, he will be forced to write down what is happening/has happened into the book. This repeats and the PC gets attached to the book, not wanting to part from it.

>>4659409

And my pally just solved world hunger

>>4659409
Give cupcake to BBEG, tell him sword conjures them, sell sword to BBEG.

A pair of boots, once you wear them a great force repels one of your feet, now you can't have both feet in the ground at the same time (two surfaces must have at least 90º angle)

>>4659518
sounds like you could invent some X-sport out of using those boots

Archive'd
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/4657047/

>>4657111
>third of a dwarf

So, just a beard then?

>>4659518
sounds good for sneaking around the top of rooms

>>4659607
They don't provide adhesive abilities.

Staff Of Miniaturization

When used, the staff greats a 1:24 scale miniature of the user and the target, dice and a sheet of statistics and rules for each of them. The staff stops the full scale versions from attacking each other and they must use the miniatures to resolve the combat.

>>4659682
>a great force repels one of your feet, now you can't have both feet in the ground at the same time (two surfaces must have at least 90º angle)
curved wall/ceiling combos

>>4659687

>>4657775

>Staff of lightning - a staff made from 6 feet of lightning. Equip it and show everyone what a livewire you are!

>>4659718
...That does not say anything about sticking to walls. Seriously, are you retarded?

>>4659687
That sounds ridiculously awesome, actually. Have some huge fucking enemy you don't want to be attacked by? Use that wand and worry about the other monsters.

>>4659736
FINE LOOKS LIKE YOU WON THE THREAD WELL DONE YOU MADE THE USELESSEST MAGIC ITEM

>>4659874
I didn't make it. I'm just arguing that you are, in fact, retarded.

It's probably an excellent trainer for balance, or to use one leg as an unmoveable table.

The Chair of Sitting

This magically enchanted item compels the character to sit on it only if the character is exhausted and fails will save(DC ?).

Bottles of Beer

The PCs will mostly likely find these magic items in a crate that's been propped against a wall. The bottles themselves appear to have some kind of gravity defect, causing them to "fall" to the nearest flat, vertical surface.

The crate contains ninety-nine of these unusual items.

A two-dimensional hero.

He sticks to flat surfaces and, while he claims to be an able warrior, he is seemingly incapable of using his limbs in the third dimension.

>>4660109
When all but one have fallen, they reset

>>4659345
Exactly. As it is, it's just a crossbow that shoots bolts straight into the ground (or random directions in weird places like demiplanes and whatnot)

>>4660169

It's funny, because that also applies to >>4660148.

>>4660394

HEY, FUCK YOU, AT LEAST I FIGHT LIKE A MAN

>>4659976
More amusing in game:
>The Chair of Sitting: This magically enchanted item compels the all characters in sight to sit on it and will compel them to to fight for it.

Also this

Deathblow: A powerful hammer that deals massive nonleathal damage.

>>4660641
How is that useless? Insta-knockout is the best.

The Feeblemind Ring of Permanency Mirror Image
The ring creates decoy diplicates of you (1d4+8),
who are permanent as long you wear the ring.
The mirror images copy the ringbearer identical,
but they cast (separately, every hour as long the bearer is not affected)
feeblemind on the bearer. With Int 1 he's not able to detect the source
of his stupidity, overall he doesn't even know he's enchanted with "feeblemind".

Recharging Ring of Daylight
Magic ring casts Daylight, but only when the sun is shining on the ring.

Tenser's Floating Codpiece.

A stylish codpeice that imparts a +1 armor bonus. Occasionally it will just start floating, dragging the wearer along by his crotch.

>>4661064

>>4661172
Can also be used to pretend you're a paladin of pelor.

Ring of Waterbreathing:
While wearing this ring, you can breathe water, but you can no longer breathe air.

Gloves of compression:
Whilst wearing both enchanted gloves the wearer is able to squeeze any item and have it compress slightly (Akin to a stiff sponge) in his grasp, irrespective of the items hardness. As he releases his grip the item returns to it's former shape and state.

Coin of Zero Resolution.

When flipped, the coin always lands on its side.

>>4661571
you could make tons of cashing gambling.

>>4661583
But you have to be slick about it, or you could EASILY be caught.

>>4657047
Overpowered

Our DM give us a whitle to call a Therabitian army

A thing.
When activated it does something(maybe).

Gloves of dove conjuration: as a free action, and at will, the one who wears these gloves can summon a harmless flock of doves to momentarely distract (the time of a free action) everyone.

>>4658966
Make a save against the dehumidifier or die.

Glove of Spaghetti

While worn, gives the user the at-will ability to emanate spaghetti as a projectile with a range of 1-15 feet. Good for feeding the poor and humiliating your rivals, and that's about it.

>>4657104
That's not a pun.

The Sword of the Stoned.

The single most powerful blade in ALL of existence. However... as soon as you pick it up, you become blitzed out of your skull, and lose all motivation to do anything other than find the nearest couch to chill on. Also afflicts you with random bursts of hunger, and makes everything funny.

Coathanger of Cleanliness. When held, the user and all of their possessions become instantly clean and cannot be dirtied.

The DM gave it to us as a joke, then later on we used it to cross a room of green slime.