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  • File :1245004797.jpg-(110 KB, 703x909, fatal..jpg)
    110 KB FATAL Dm-anything 06/14/09(Sun)14:39 No.4878401  
    Ok, Basically I have a deal with my players.

    If they buy the books for me, every few months I will run ANY System they want with a tailored campaign.

    Ive done old dusty D6 based games, to the wildest D20 B.S.

    Near the end of this month a new book will be arriving... FATAL. Ive only heard a little bit about it, and Ive done a bit of research on it.

    What I want to know from /tg/ is this...

    Have any here even actually played it, and if so, what are its true pros and cons?

    I don't expect to run the game for more then 2 or 3 weeks, but Id still like to be as prepared as I can be, and while net reviews are ok, Id rather hear first hand from people who have played a system before.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)14:41 No.4878417
    Just don't do it.. Forget going insane or all of that. It is just horrible and you must really want to waste your time if you are going to read it..

    Reading is fundamental but reading bad books is just wasting your eyesight.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)14:42 No.4878425
    Sage for shitty trollan.
    >> Dm-anything 06/14/09(Sun)14:42 No.4878426
    >>4878417

    Have you read it before or played in it?
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)14:43 No.4878441
    Its going to require a HUGE investment in time to actually learn the rules. The damn thing is 900 pages long. Also I didn't think there are any paper copies of FATAL, only PDF, are you perhaps a troll like some other anons seem to believe? I don't really see how this would piss people off honestly....at least anymore than anything else.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)14:44 No.4878450
    >>4878401

    The site appears to be down, so I had to use the Internet Archive... but here is the most famous review of FATAL.

    http://web.archive.org/web/20080112095246/atrocities.primaryerror.net/fatal.html

    Roll for anal circumference.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)14:44 No.4878454
    your players are all males ?

    16-18 virgins ?

    prepare to get raped
    >> Dm-anything 06/14/09(Sun)14:44 No.4878455
    >>4878425

    Im honestly not... Its a real deal with my Player group, its gotten me a lot of good gamebooks in the past. Im just trying to get a heads up, an honest one, of what Im getting in to here.
    >> Six of Spades ♠ !!laKnRUJ70gO 06/14/09(Sun)14:44 No.4878456
    >>4878401
    Put simply, the mechanics are overly complicated (take the Vehicle design mathematics from GURPS, but apply it to all aspects of the creation and combat system); and the sentiment of the setting and flavouring reeks of assorted racism/sexism/homophobia.

    Bits are funny, but not the good kind of funny. Laugh as your soul shrivels and dies.
    >> Dm-anything 06/14/09(Sun)14:45 No.4878467
    >>4878456

    Sweet God, am I going to need to pull out my old Ti-85?
    >> Ru 06/14/09(Sun)14:48 No.4878489
    Y'know, a group of players actually once tried to talk me into running Fatal for them once. I didn't know them that well, just met them through an ad at my local gaming store. So this guy Dave (names changed to protect the guilty) was apparently their spokesperson and I asked him about the kind of characters they wanted to play.

    Whoo boy.

    Dave himself played an elven warrior with a 15" wide anus (apparently he rolled for this). He had a fat whale of a girlfriend called Mary who had another elf, except some sort of thief-type, whose vagina could only hold 4 inches worth of penetration. I shit you not, they made a point of telling me this. Apparently she had also rolled for all sorts of other bizarre details, like nipples a full inch long and two inches wide, on breasts that were only A cup. I tried to explain this sort of stuff could be left up to the player, as she obviously disliked this character's appearance, but she wouldn't have any of it.

    Anyway, there was also Chris and Stephen. Chris and motherfucking Stephen. They had both rolled "Anakim", some sort of half-demon race like tieflings. The players themselves were a little too young and horny (especially when around eachother), but they made great effort to impress upon me their characters' special gifts. Chris' little monster made babies scream, and when he touched them they had to shit, piss, and vomit all at once. I think he liked to fuck them afterwards. Stephen's sorry excuse for a tiefling had a penis over five feet long. I checked the book, I swear it's possible. It could've been longer even. Oh, and his character with the giant penis? She was called Anastyasa Darkmoon.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)14:48 No.4878490
    >>4878467
    Yes
    >> Ru 06/14/09(Sun)14:48 No.4878503
    When I asked them about what sort of adventures they'd like to do, they basically began to describe raping Mary. Not the character per se, just Mary. And take a dump on her chest and god knows what else. The poor girl must've been brainwashed or just starved for human contact, because she seemed to put up with it rather than kicking their asses.

    Chris was just about to ask me if I minded to roleplay scenes where he'd fuck vomitting babies, when I just couldn't take anymore and shouted, "Who the fuck are you people?!"

    And they exclaimed: "We're The Aristocrats!"
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)14:51 No.4878520
         File :1245005461.jpg-(80 KB, 640x448, san loss nina einstein.jpg)
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    >>4878503
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)14:53 No.4878539
         File :1245005603.jpg-(21 KB, 347x393, I lol'd.jpg)
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    >>4878503

    Pic relevant
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)14:54 No.4878545
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    >>4878503

    10/10
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)14:54 No.4878551
         File :1245005672.jpg-(150 KB, 249x737, i-lold.jpg)
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    >>4878503

    See pic
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:03 No.4878633
         File :1245006194.jpg-(29 KB, 640x480, borntosee.jpg)
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    >>4878503

    God Damn it!

    Perfect Troll is Perfect -_-
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:12 No.4878727
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    10/10 +10
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:19 No.4878796
    would someone tell me why this is funny? i understand the whole "bel air" kind of thing but i dont get the refrence
    >> The Laughing Man !AWEsomEEEE!!CwndNHTjLMy 06/14/09(Sun)15:20 No.4878814
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    >>4878503
    You, sir, just won all my internets.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:22 No.4878828
    >>4878796

    L2comedyhistory
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:22 No.4878832
         File :1245007374.gif-(1.3 MB, 300x239, 1208158525939.gif)
    1.3 MB
    >>4878489
    >>4878503
    100/10
    your technique is flawless
    >> The Laughing Man !AWEsomEEEE!!CwndNHTjLMy 06/14/09(Sun)15:23 No.4878834
    >>4878796
    The Aristocrats joke.

    Google it.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:23 No.4878835
         File :1245007389.jpg-(127 KB, 800x569, mootcouch.jpg)
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    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Aristocrats_(joke)

    The Aristocrats (also known as The Debonaires or The Sophisticates in some tellings) is an exceptionally transgressive dirty joke that has been told by numerous stand-up comedians since the vaudeville era. Steven Wright has likened it to a secret handshake among comedians, and it is seen as something of a game in which those who tell it try to top each other in terms of shock value. It is rarely told the same way twice, often improvised, and was the subject of a 2005 documentary film of the same name. It is thought of as a badge of honor among expert comedians and is notoriously hard to perform successfully. Throughout its long history, it has evolved from a clichéd staple of vaudevillian humor into a postmodern anti-joke.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:24 No.4878855
         File :1245007481.jpg-(68 KB, 600x750, awesome2.jpg)
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    >>4878503
    Well played!

    over 9000/10
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:28 No.4878888
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    >>4878503

    God damn. 10/10
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:28 No.4878894
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    >>4878503
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:30 No.4878914
         File :1245007838.gif-(787 KB, 480x360, 9613.gif)
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    >>4878503

    Well done good Sir.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:30 No.4878918
    >>4878503
    Holy shit.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:31 No.4878926
         File :1245007880.jpg-(40 KB, 665x500, orly.jpg)
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    >>4878503
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:31 No.4878927
         File :1245007880.jpg-(211 KB, 848x1199, 1203_de7f0520a4deb5f99dc12ae2c(...).jpg)
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    >>4878503
    Congratulations, here's your thread-related prize!
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:34 No.4878956
    >>4878503

    Is the aristocrats joke supposed to be funny? Americans really are retarded...
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:35 No.4878966
    >>4878956

    yeah, this joke is like saying: PENIS and then, while the audience is shocked: LOL I TROLL UUU
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:35 No.4878967
    >>4878956
    >Unsuccessful trollan
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:36 No.4878975
         File :1245008168.png-(716 KB, 872x4850, 6-14-2009 2-34-05 PM.png)
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    i wanted to be able to prove i was here for this.

    pic related.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:36 No.4878980
    >>4878967

    no, im really serious, its not funny. i'm sure you giggle when someone say vagina, ass or dick
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:37 No.4878986
    I don't understand what is funny about this either, but I suppose it's just my lack of humor.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:37 No.4878990
    >>4878503
    This is the best variant of "the aristocrats" ever (also, the only one that has managed to cause me to react in something other than disgust). It is a magnificent blend of creativity, parody, and association.
    Outside of this thread, it would probably only be half as funny. Outside of /tg/, it would only possess a quarter of the hilarity. To someone who doesn't know about FATAL, it wouldn't be funny at all. You, sir, rolled a natural 20.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:37 No.4878991
    >>4878956
    >>4878966

    that's the brilliance of it. it's the ultimate troll. the original troll. the alpha troll. the fucking vaudevillian troll. that shit is old school and you'd do well to remember that.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:37 No.4878992
    >>4878966
    >>4878956
    The joke is to horrify the audience, ending in "The Aristocrats!" is a way to say "Just kidding"
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:39 No.4879003
    >>4878990

    >You, sir, rolled a natural 20.

    no, he rolled a natural 20 on a d12.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:39 No.4879013
    >>4878980
    You must really be an idiot, then. The joke is not funny because it is shocking, it's funny because it's funny. It's referential meta-humor.

    The point of the joke is that it's hard to pull off in a humorous fashion without looking lame.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:40 No.4879021
    >>4878991

    old school doesnt mean good school, lil guy
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:42 No.4879036
    >>4879021
    You still don't understand. Lemme break it down for you:

    The funny part is that you don't find it funny.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:42 No.4879048
         File :1245008571.jpg-(276 KB, 720x1080, 1242779128448.jpg)
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    >>4878503
    Good show. The aristocrats perfectly describes FATAL adventuring.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:45 No.4879083
    It's a metajoke.

    The funny part is that it isn't funny.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:46 No.4879084
         File :1245008775.jpg-(77 KB, 700x482, 1244118766385.jpg)
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    >>4878489
    >>4878503

    YEEAARRRGGGHHHH
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:49 No.4879108
         File :1245008985.jpg-(175 KB, 872x850, FATALaristocrats.jpg)
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    >>4878975
    Here is a condensed version. It took over 2 minutes in paint.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:51 No.4879114
    >>4879083
    well i don't meta find it meta funny
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:51 No.4879116
    >>4878956

    It's a European joke from the vaudeville era.

    Yes, I am ashamed too.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:53 No.4879126
    Please tell me he's joking. Humanity can't have fallen this far.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:53 No.4879135
    The Aristocrats is an antijoke. The punchline makes no sense, and the entire thing is a shaggy dog story of the most vile and disgusting kind.
    The general set up is a family performing act going to a talent agency, and showing their set up. The set up is whatever horrible thing the teller can think up and involves scatological, sexual, incestual, and outright WRONG acts of perversity and filth.
    It ends with the talent agent, stunned throughout the performance of the depraved family, asking what they call the act.

    They respond with "the Aristocrats!". It started as a general mockery of the upper class, and has evolved into the watermark of great comedy. It's vile and disgusting and can't be told in mixed company, or even company. It can only be gotten away with in the seediest of clubs and never being told on stage, but if you can make the audience laugh through it all, you've passed the test. It's a masterwork piece for any stand up comedian.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:54 No.4879142
    >>4878956
    >>4878980
    >>4879021

    Sorry but it clearly went over your head. No one should have to witness such a moment and not get something out of it. Best to keep thinking Americans are retarded and just move on.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:56 No.4879159
    >>4879126
    This joke is older than everyone you've ever known and everyone they've ever known. In fact, it's probably older than everyone THEY'VE ever known.
    This joke is so old that it was old when your greatgrandpappy was new.

    Humanity has not 'fallen' anywhere. And considering that humanity used to sacrifice each other's hearts on stone altars, I think we've done a lot more rising than falling.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)15:58 No.4879181
    Can you rape cats in this game?
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)16:00 No.4879198
    >>4879135
    Bob Motherfucking Saget
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)16:02 No.4879233
    >>4879198
    Bob Saget is a filthy disgusting bastard who hides behind a facade of being a respectable family man and a white collar white male. Everything that comes out of his mouth is perverse and disgusting.

    The perfect comedian, basically.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)16:20 No.4879407
    Archived for posterity.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)16:49 No.4879711
    >>4879233
    its true
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)16:51 No.4879723
    >>4879233
    Reminds me of that Nostalgia Critic episode about Full House...
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)18:24 No.4880464
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    Best Troll in a long long time.

    Bringing back the class to /tg

    Thank you
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)18:29 No.4880488
    >>4879233

    http://www.dandwiki.com/wiki/Bob_Saget_(3.5e_Creature)
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)19:01 No.4880740
    >>4878401


    Bit late, but that review made my eyes bleed. Tell them no.

    That book should be banned by international treaty, and its author thrown into a pack of rabid killer communist penguins.

    And cacti.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)19:08 No.4880822
    >>4879198
    Gilbert Gottfried did the joke perfectly, too.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)19:09 No.4880836
    >>4879198

    WHO RAPED AND KILLED A GIRL IN 1990
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)19:16 No.4880878
    No matter what the arrangement is with your players, you must not play FATAL.

    Simply making up characters will take several agonising hours of painfully unfunny character creation. Soon you'll be "playing" a game involving the kind of low-brow humour and utter faggotry that would make a /b/tard weep.

    Its truly awful, the roleplaying equivalent of the Holocaust.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)19:19 No.4880907
    Bob Saget - The Aristocrats (complete): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0HW4mPZmKPM
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)19:22 No.4880929
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    >>4878503
    God Among Men
    10/10
    >> SageHoge !!mp3WVEd4fDm 06/14/09(Sun)19:48 No.4881096
    >>4878489
    >>4878503
    god fucking damn it.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)20:13 No.4881266
    >>4878503

    A bit late perhaps, but it is honestly the best version of The Aristocrats i have seen.

    Perfect delivery.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)21:18 No.4881694
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    Posting in a God-tier thread.

    Well played.
    >> Neco !!2xEIaE6zQtD 06/14/09(Sun)21:31 No.4881804
    I guess this has already been suptg'd, right?
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)21:34 No.4881834
    >>4881804
    See
    >>4879407
    I believe it has.
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)21:50 No.4881989
    >>4880907

    Fucking brilliant.
    Also: Sarah Silverman remembers growing up as part of the Aristocrats act.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F3GnuJPy9QA
    >> Anonymous 06/14/09(Sun)21:52 No.4882008
    oh god what is this

    my eyes bleed from looking at the FILE ICON
    >> Ghost !4u16FlNpwo 06/14/09(Sun)22:27 No.4882305
         File :1245032830.png-(78 KB, 477x355, awesome.png)
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    >>4878503
    AWESOME



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