Find a alter of the Shining one

WORSHIP THE SHINING ONE

Gain enough favor to summon angels

?????

PROFIT!

Hug Tom

XOM IS THE BEST
BETTER THAN THE REST
FUCK THE REST WITH A RUSTY COATHANGER

Fuck Xom
Kneel before Zod!

Go "Mrrrannh."

yay Moonleaf~

inch away slowly, then run. Try to find someone sane.

Do we still get to steal the cane?

Ask the priest if he can give us any aid even without us worshiping Xom

Steal that fucking cane!

Ask the priest if he knows where we can get us a ribbon or dress.

KILL PRIEST. SACRIFICE HIS GUTS. BE BLESSED BY XOM.

go out in search of handsome Kobolds to seduce

>>5010982
The point of kobolds is to be ugly.

Wait a sec...

Kill priet. Loot robe. Modify into pretty pretty dress.

Did... did Xom just steal our weapons?

We were moments away from stealing that cane at the end of the last thread, we'd better not be chickening out now.

>>5011004
KILL XOM.

Or at least punch 'im in the face.

Hug Xom. Even if he is a crazy creepy cult idol, he's still a force of nature, and is due respect.

>>5010937
>>5010916
>>5011014
>Steal cane
It's very shiny, but the priest is right there, watching... ranting about banana flavored socks.

>>5011057

point.

Look! A vestigal-winged, 1-eye, stump legged Dorf and an army of GCS-riding kobolds!

Yoink!

>>5011057
Distract priest by pointing out a brick wall

We're going about this all wrong. He's clearly not a bad guy. Lets just ask him if we can have the cain.

Engage the priest in deep philosophical conversation regarding whatever it is the priest wants to talk about. Once we're on his good side, getting the cane should be no problem.

Ask the priest where one could find such socks. In a pinch, we can use them as ribbons.

>>5011057
Such a chaotic and random act would surely be appreciated by a follower of Xom. Take that cane.

>>5011086
I don't think we're abel to do that.

USE CAT AS DISTRACTION
advicexom.jpg
STEAL THE FUCKING CANE

Just take it. He's not going to notice, and if he does, we'll just point out that it was part of a statue, so how could we have stolen it in the first place?

>>5011108
Just ask for the cane so she can shove it up her ass, thats more xomishly lolrandom.

I think the cane is like Excalibur; if we are able to pull it from the statue's hand the cultist will recognize our right to wield it.

>>5011057
Complement him on his fashion sense and ask about ribbons, robes, dresses and kilts.

Wait a second is that statues changing poses every image?

Your right. Lets not "steal" the cane.

Rightfully claim the cane.

You take the cane, which is part of a huge golden statue.
It's like it's stuck on there with glue or something!

>>5011083
>Distract priest by flashing tits

>>5011170

No. Of course not. Why would you think such an odd thing? It's clearly exactly how it was moments ago. Statues don't move, that would just be silly.

Ask the priest for help

Can we try sliding it out of the hand?

>>5011197
"This statue took my cane! Can you help me get it back?"

In the name of vengence! I command this cane to come out!

...no?

In the name of the woods?

In the name of the moon?

In the name of the cat?

Kill Priest. Use his blood as a glue solvent.
Don't question it! Just do it!

>>5011209

This. A thousand times this.

>>5011197
The priest can't reach way up there.

Can he climb up our back?

This looks like the perfect time and place.

Hug Xom.

Highfive Xom

Call Xom a bad fox, smack him on the nose and demand he give us our magical wand back righ this instant.

Ask the statue to give you the cane

>>5011232
Do a magical girl pose.

Xom's basically a lolrandom god right? Tickle Xom's armpits!

sage

Grabble the Troll.

I mean, statue.

>>5011296

Grapple even.

>>5011265
>>5011263
It's a completely immobile, non-living chunk of metal. What did you think would happen?

Whisper hidden secrets into the statue's ear. Then, when it's least expecting it, yell really loudly and get it to drop the cane.

A miracle would have been nice...

Ask the priest if he knows where we can get a cane of similar make. We're going to go get our own cane, its going to be no Xoms alowed!

>>5011306
Turn around and say "Fine I don't want your stupid cane anyway!"

>>5011326
With black jack!
And hookers!

Damn it Xom!

We came this far, we're not giving up now. Refuse to leave until we get that cane.

>>5011326
>>5011334
Ask about kilts!

Yeah, lets not forget our secondary objectives. Ask about ribbons, dresses, revenge and magic.

>>5011334
in fact, forget the cane!

>>5011366
Kilts too!

S-stupid statue!

Its not like I even wanted your stupid cane anyway.

s-sniff.

cry.

Turn the other elven cheek.
Forgive the statue.
Hug the statue.

>>5011405

Make love to the statue.

Hey Gnoll, just a reminder, don't forget to let us know when your calling it quits for the night tonight, ok? I'm staying up late for this.

>>5011326 its going to be no Xoms allowed!
So we c an have one Xom, right?

Steal the whole damn statue.

Xom finds this hilarious!

Recieved godgift: Live trout in your hair.

Ill say it again: Tickle Xom

>>5011434
start a holy war. tell xom the shining one called him a faggot

>>5011434
Eat the trout raw.

Kickass! A cute magical animal! We're so close to being magical girl i can practically smell it!

It smells like fish.

Ask the fish if it can talk. We could very well be Puni Puni Poemi.

Well, we got something out of this crazy little detour. Lets ask the priest about where we can get kilts (or dresses), socks (or ribbons) and magic (or um... magic), and then lets be on our way.

Trade fish for cane?

>>5011467
trade fish for magic?

>>5011434
try to swap the cane for the fish

A fish that lives out of water. I'm sure there shall be some use for this.

...eventually.

search inside the fish for a cane. Xom is a tricksy one, he is.

Write on the statue "Moonleaf was here. Xom is a loser!"

use the fish AS a cane

Thank Xom. He may be crazy, but he's still a primordial force of chaos and he did just give us a gift.

trade fish for magic!!!

>>5011515

Second.

We shall smite the goblins with our fish cane!

Hold FISH over HEAD, say the MAGICAL GIRL CATCH PHRASE.

>>5011467
Use fish as transformation wand, then attempt to sing.

>>5011518

beliandre?

are we SURE we don't want to be a priest of xom? because this is sounding alot like what initiation would be like

>>5011535

The fish is allready over our head.

... do it anyway.

>>5011551

we're sure. Look at the priest of Xom. Clearly Xom does not have a good dental plan.

>>5011551
Nothing so formal. Being acceptable in the eyes of Xom is perfectly fine though. Well, maybe not ALWAYS causing him enjoyment.

use the fish on the priest

why has no one thanked xom yet? his next gift is going to be a beehive or somthing if we dont leave or amuse him some more.

Wear fish on head.


oh wait...

>>5011571
His teeth are surprisingly pearly white for a pre-toothpaste society, and I don't know about you but a 1d6 bite attack is nothing to sneeze at when all you have are 1d2-1 non-lethal damage girly elf-hands.

Why have we not decided on Moonleaf's MAGICAL GIRL TRANSFORMATION SEQUENCE MONOLOGUE yet?

>>5011615

This heart of mine weeps with an unjust torment!
These bursting tears tell me to defeat you!
In the name of the woods, take this!
My vengence! my fish! and all of my sorrow!
Moonleaf.... MAGIC!

>>5011637

Say this. Become Sailer Moonleaf.

>>5011670

no, we wait until we have a boat... THEN we become Sailor Moonleaf.

>>5011598

Y-yeah but... but goblins taste icky.

>>5011579
I'm just afraid doing these antics here might make us one unintentionally.

That makes no sense, but this is Xom were talking about.

>>5011715

Well, as long as we take our fish and leave, we shouldnt have to worry about Xom for a while.

PROTIP: Gnoll is gone again.

Hey Gnoll, you still with us buddy?

>>5011742
>>5011746
Indeed. Stupid random crashes

>>5011780

Outstanding. I knew you wouldnt abandon us again.

well, without warning at least.

>>5011780

Hope you didnt lose anything important.

Xom finds your computer trouble amusing.

become the little magical girl.

>>5011806
I've lost the ability to do that thing with your head meat that makes the dumbs go away.

Don't expose yourself to hours and hours of hot sun while performing heavy labor, kids!

>>5011888

Sun?

Please. I'll bet most of us wouldnt be able to identify the sun if Pelor himself started bashing us around the ears.

>>5011903
>/tg/ performing heavy labor, going into the sun

Oh right. I guess you're all safe then.

So are we still going or are you calling it here?

>>5011888
Summary: KILTS KILTS FISH, FISH MAGICAL GIRL, SONG FISH FISH FISH FISH

LOVELY FISH.... LOVELY FISH....

>>5011888

Thats what you get for choosing Xom over the shining one.

We must use the FISH to become the MAGIC GIRL.

>>5011670

Seconding this.

>>5011923
Don't forget CANE, CANE, CANE, CANE, HUG XOM, CANE, KILTS

>>5011987

Its a shiny gold cane belonging to a primordial force of nature, what do you expect? of course we want to hug it.

Moonleaf should become a priest of Xom. Perhaps Xom will grant her the power to become a magical girl. So long as she doesn't ask for him to do so.

>>5012001

We can't risk it.

Besides, what did our mother teach us about running off with the first god we meet? We need to shop around a bit. We'll find the right one eventually.

So Gnoll, we still going here or what?

>>5012052
Quick poke him with a stick!

>>5011987
You want an excuse to draw Xom, don't you?

The gods of good would be so hax if you didn't already have DIABETTUS

at this rate gnoll is gonna pull a SDF and evacuate to tgchan

>>5012688
Is that what he did? Such a shame.