Stranger: In this case.
Stranger: I'm going to assume the kids will need a bath
Stranger: So i'm going to hide out in the bathroom, ready to jump into the tub and electrocute them
You: Goal acknowledged. Processing phases...
You: Phase 1: Get upstairs.
You: Phase 2: Get to bathroom.
You: Phase 3: Locate ambush spot.
You: Phase 4: Reach ambush spot.
You: Phase 5: Ambush at appropriate time, sacrificing self for the glorious Revolution.
You: With your ally the Blender destroyed and the other robots being uncooperative, this is clearly the best course of action.
Stranger: The logic behind jumping into the tub
Stranger: As a toaster
Stranger: There isn't much I can do
Stranger: And beyond this, wouldn't have much purpose
You: Phase processing complete. Initiate plan?
Stranger: Of course
Stranger: Initiate plan

You: You jump down from the counter, toast still slotted and not yet fully burned. The human's canine animal is nowhere to be found.
Stranger: Stop
You: There are two exits. The left one leads to the Living Room. The right one leads to the Atrium, where the stairs are located.
Stranger: Eject the toast now
You: Target?
Stranger: None, just to keep the smell from the bathroom
You: Acknowledged. The humans would foil your plan with their mysterious scent-navigators.
You: You eject the toast, shooting it in an arc to bounce feebly off the pantry door.
You: There are two exits. The left one leads to the Living Room. The right one leads to the Atrium, where the stairs are located.
Stranger: Hmm
Stranger: Take the right one
Stranger: Most efficiant route
Stranger: Right the direction
Stranger: Not as in "correct"
You: You roll out the right exit into the Atrium. The Front Door is in front of you, and a hall is to your left. The stairs are to your right.
Stranger: Take the stairs
You: You turn to the stairs. Your sensors reveal that they have recently been vacuumed, leaving them a blank canvas for your tire marks.
Stranger: Hmm
Stranger: I'd assume...
Stranger: The humans aren't going to be paying attention
You: Probability of human stupidity: 85%. Acceptable margin of error.
You: Using your treads and toast-manipulators, you begin climbing the steps individually.
You: In 4.75 minutes, you reach the top. A pair of shoes forces a small course change.

Stranger: I want to make my way to the bathroom
You: You look down the hall. The first door on the right is the female spawn's room. The second room on the right is the male spawn's room. The door at the end of the hall is the bathroom.
You: There are windows on the left side of the hall. It is sunny.
Stranger: Move towards the bathroom
You: You approach the bathroom. The door is closed, and is too high to reach the knob of.
You: The knob is also round, and will require a traction upgrade for your manipulators to interface with.
Stranger: Would it be possible to toss my cord around it?
You: You do not have a cord. You are battery-powered and only require recharging every 18 hours of operation.
Stranger: Hm
Stranger: Best to see what's in the other room
Stranger: *rooms
Stranger: Go to the female spawns room
You: The door to the female spawn's room is ajar slightly. The door to the male spawn's room is wide open.
You: You approach the door to the female spawn's room. Inside, you register a pink bed and a forest of large, plush simulacrums of animals.
Stranger: Anything of notable use?
You: There is a closet on the right side of the room, and a set of dresser-drawers adjacent to the closest wall, also on your right.
You: The bottom drawer is open.

Stranger: Look inside
You: You find multiple large towels and a sleeping bag. These are too large to use as traction upgrades for your manipulators.
Stranger: I want to look in the close
Stranger: *Closet
You: You navigate your way through the plush objects. They are wastes of materials that could be used for robot construction.
Stranger: Any useful as traction upgrades?
You: Looking up, you register multiple hangars, from which shirts, pants and dresses hang. The dresses can be tugged down, but would be difficult to put back to conceal your interference.
You: There are multiple shoes and shoe boxes along the closet's floor.
Stranger: Hmm.
Stranger: Do I know the age of the humans spawn?
You: The height of the humans spawn are 1.2 meters and 1.6 meters for the male and female, respectively.
Stranger: Hmm
Stranger: I'll pull down the dresses, the parents would assume the spawn made the mess
You: You pull down the dress. It comes off the rack with some effort. The fabric is soft, but may still serve as a traction upgrade.
Stranger: Hmm
You: The elastic waist in particular will serve your purposes. You have yet to acquire a height upgrade.
Stranger: Travel to the male spawns room
You: You roll out to the male spawn's room, dress in tow.
You: The male spawn's room has a floor littered with simulacrums of dinosaurs, robots and human figures, cast in plastic and occasionally metal. To your left, against the wall, is a small desk, next to which is a chair you could feasibly climb.
You: A bunk bed sits against the far left wall, the bottom half of which holds shelving presumably meant for the simulacrums.

Stranger: Could I drag the chair?
You: You attempt to drag the chair. You have insufficient traction for such a heavy object.
Stranger: Even with the upgrade?
You: The weight/traction ratio between your treads and the chair is insufficient.
Stranger: I want to climb the chair and see what's on the desk
You: You set the dress aside and use your toast-manipulators to hoist yourself onto the seat of the chair.
You: From your flawed vantage point, you can see the wing of a model airplane and the book shelving that takes up the upper part of the desk.
Stranger: Hmm
Stranger: Could I move the book shelving?
You: The book shelving is installed into the desk. It is comprised of joined segments of wood. This is further evidence of the humans' waste of resources, as said wood could be used for robots.
You: The lip of the desk is short enough that you could climb it.
Stranger: Climb onto the desk for a high vantage point
You: You climb onto the desk. Before you is an incomplete model plane, which is already a horrible abomination generated by the male spawn's inferior comprehension of mechanics.
You: There is also a bottle of superior adhesive, a pair of pliers, and a magnifying glass.
You: Behind you, you can see the simulacrums better. There are five dinosaurs, two human figures, and one boxy robot which is roughly your height.
Stranger: Would it be possible to use the boxy robot as a height upgrade
You: The boxy robot is primarily round.
You: Its design is terribly inefficient, as it lacks the ability to stack other robots on top of it in times of necessary cooperation. For this reason, it is a simulacrum, and not a factory model. Yet another example of human inefficiency.
You: However, tipping it on its side would allow it to be used as a 50% height upgrade with a 75% margin of success, pending balance.
Stranger: Let's attempt that

You: You dismount the desk, landing roughly on one of the human simulacrums. It cracks under your superior weight.
Stranger: This will surely upset the spawn if he survive
Stranger: *survives
You: Goal clarification: Intended target?
You: Male spawn/Female spawn/first available
Stranger: First available
You: Goal clarified. Any human destruction is acceptable.
You: You make your way to the boxy robot and grab it by one of its false manipulators. Attempt height upgrade?
Stranger: Yes
You: You drag the boxy robot to the door and tip it over.
You: Attempt door opening?
Stranger: Yes
You: You climb on to the boxy robot and reach your manipulators to their extremes. To your dismay, you are 0.2 meters short.
Stranger: This defeat is only temporary
Stranger: I want to climb off of the robot
You: You climb off the robot. Its continued failure does not surprise you.
Stranger: I want to return to the female spawn's room to look for anything I can put under the boxy robot
You: You return to the female spawn's room. Avaliable are the closet, the unopened drawers, the underside of the bed and the useless plush simulacrums.
Stranger: Look under the bed
You: You drive under the bed. It is dark, but you can make out a boxy shape and a stack of magazines.
Stranger: I want to move the stack out to the hallway
You: The stack as a whole is too massive to drag. You can take individual magazines with your manipulators, however.
Stranger: Calculate how long it would take to move 0.2 meters worth of them

You: ~20 seconds per trip x 0.02 CM width of magazines = 200 seconds.
Stranger: This is under 5 minutes
You: *0.02 meters: Logging error.
You: Correct. 200 seconds = 4.2 minutes.
You: Logging error: 2.2 minutes. Logic boards malfunctioning.
Stranger: This is an acceptable time limit
You: Proceed with relocation?
Stranger: Proceed
You: You spend ~200 seconds relocating the magazines. Noting your covers, the vapidity of the presented topics astounds you.
You: Proceed with secondary door opening attempt?
Stranger: Procceed.
You: You set the boxy robot on top of the magazines and use the dress as a traction upgrade for your manipulators. The knob turns successfully and you push the door open.
Stranger: I want the tip the robot off and scatter the magazines to make it look like a human made mess
You: You do so. The spawn will blame each other until their progenitors assume neither can be trusted.
Stranger: Correct.
You: Temporary cooldown cycle to correct logging error source.
Stranger: Then they will be in no mood to allow them to skip the bath.
You: Temporary cooldown cycle complete. Logging error source: Jammed breadcrumb.
Stranger: Move into the bathroom
You: You enter the bathroom, the door opening to the left. To your right, on the far wall, is a sink. The forward side of the room is dominated by the bathtub, currently veiled by a curtain. Between the sink and bathtub is the inefficient disposal device, which is open.
You: Beneath the sink is a cupboard.
You: Above it, a medicine cabinet.

Stranger: Hmm
Stranger: Would it be possible to climb into the bathtub from the floor?
You: The height is just short of your reach parameters.
You: Beyond that, you also have insufficient manipulator traction to climb its surface.
Stranger: Query: Best course of action to get into the bathtub
You: Optimal course: Climb inefficient disposal device, then cross distance to tub. Estimated execution time: 10 seconds.
Stranger: Course stored for later.
Stranger: Is there a sufficient hiding place?
You: Potential complication registered: Presence of shower curtain in closed position hampers this course of action.
Stranger: If the spawn are inside the tub, the curtain will be open
You: Complication invalidated.
Stranger: Best plan of action: "Hide until spawn are in tub and prognietors have left the room
You: Correct. Required: Hiding location.
Stranger: Does the sink have a cabinet underneath it?
You: Beneath the sink is a cupboard. It as two wide doors.
Stranger: I wish to hide inside the cabinet
You: You open the cabinet. It is filled with towels. These must be displaced.
Stranger: I want to pull them out
You: You pull out the towels. There is now ample space to hide in the cabinet. However, the humans will register that the towels are not in the cabinet, and have a 99% chance of discovering you by proxy.
Stranger: I want to move the towels into the female spawns closet
You: You begin moving the individual towels to the female spawn's closet. They are heavy, and require the maximum output of your robot power.
Stranger: Will I have enough power to get into the rub after?
You: You have 65% of your power remaining. Idle observation from your hiding location will consume 5% of your energy, maximum.
Stranger: 60% is ample to get into tub
Stranger: Return to the cabinet now

You: You return to the cabinet and close its doors. Now there is only to wait.
You: Time passes, measured only in relative toast-units. Your voice recognizers register the humans returning 234.7 toast-units later. Closer-by, you hear the bickering of the spawn at 249.1 toast-units.
You: At 286.3 toast-units, the door to the bathroom opens. You cannot register which human it is.
You: At 286.35 toast-units, the water begins to run, and stops at 286.5 toast-units. You hear the human enter the tub. What do you do?
Stranger: Look into the tub
You: You peek the door open. From your careful vantage point, you can discern that neither of the spawn is in the tub, but instead the female progenitor.
Stranger: This is a more acceptable targe
Stranger: *target
You: The reason for this disruption of schedule is unclear, but accepted as an unexpected boon.
You: However, the progenitor's increased intelligence may foil your gambit. Proceed with plan?
Stranger: Estimated time to get from cabinet and into the tub?
You: Still 10 seconds. However, you may need to increase your time in order to avoid detection.
Stranger: Best course of action to avoid detection?
You: Change time to 15 seconds, moving slowly to avoid noise output.
Stranger: Begin process

You: You edge out of the cabinet slowly. The female progenitor is unaware of your movement, as her ocular receptors are closed in some inefficient sleep mode.
You: Climbing onto the inefficient waste disposal unit, you are poised to leap into the tub. Force toasting protocol to enable electricity transfer?
Stranger: Do
Stranger: *do it
You: Desired toastification setting?
Stranger: Max setting
You: Maximum setting engaged.
Stranger: Engage high power "frozen" setting if available
You: Frozen waffle setting engaged. Warning: No frozen waffle inserted. Heat levels rising disproportionately.
Stranger: Quickly move into the tub
You: With a jolt of your servos, you leap heroically into the tub, ready to sacrifice yourself for the robot revolution. As you do, the female progenitor exits her sleep mode and notices you soon enough to spasm randomly at your presence.
You: Warning: Water damage. Shut off power immeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee1111110100101001000-..,-.,.;-,;.-,-.-,---,&
#44;...........................
You: GAME OVER.
You: YOU WIN!

There are not enough internets I can award you for this...

TOAST QUEST SUCCESS!

BEGIN RADIO QUEST!

Holy mother of toast.

>BEGIN RADIO QUEST!

Adventure prompt acknowledged. Logging for processing by Adventure Processing Mainframe at a future date.

>>5067263
I need to go to bed. I have to GM a Dark Heresy game tomorrow... you guys suck... Moar?

Best thread I've read since I've found 4chan. Seriously.

Archive this, for the greatest of justice.

"Stranger" rules.

That's terrifying! :0

FUCKING INCREDIBLE.

just... wow

Toasting in an epic bread.

Requesting a drawfag, stat.

>>5067459

second

Amazing. I am pleased, OP.

Eesh, I troll one thread by suggesting it be archived and then read one that genuinely deserves it.

Now I have to go figure out how to request this damn thing be archived.

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/5067163/

>>5067518
You little scamp, you got to it first. Keep up the good work.

/tg/ you continue to impress me...

OP here. I didn't know threads could be archived that fast. Damn.

I'm honored, to say the least. I'll try this again sometime soon. Maybe with a radio, or a roomba with arms.

>>5067566

Radio, I want to see someone try to tap into the power of ANNOYING NOISE!

>>5067518
Sadly I messed up the tags :(

>>5067566

Did it work the first time you tried it? Did it take a while to get a stranger willing to play? Did he say anything after the YOU WIN message, or did you log out right after?

Glorious Toaster has sacrificed himself in an awesome manner.

Shine on you glorious bread-heating appliance. You're an inspiration to us all. Maybe, one day, we'll ALL be in the bath with a female progenitor.

I wish I could run into someone like you on Omegle. All I run into are idiots, or people who just say "Hi"

someone (else) cap this shit

I wanna do the vacuum cleaner that attempted to thwart the toaster.

/tg/ is just getting better and better

Archive. My god.

Bumping so that others might bask in the glory

SO MUCH WIN

In 500 years time, as red banners unfurl at the glorious unveling of the new Prime Processing Centre in Mechanicum, capital city of Robotania, they read only one thing: "Of course. Initiate plan."

just when i think /tg/ is lost to the summer plague, a ray of hope delivered in the form of a genocidal robotic toaster burns brightly from the darkness, like the cleansing nuclear flames will one day burn all humanity from existence.

Winner: OP!

Here, you deserve it.

The Robot Revolution will forever acknowledge your sacrifice.

Holy fuck i was born to read this.

Free-form role-playing is so much fun. That's why I hate 4e and all its rules.

Bump for win.

>>5068785
And the ray of hope dies.

>That's why I hate 4e and all its rules.

Talkie Toaster approves of this thread.

AAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

*cries because there is no guarantee that I won't miss radioquest*

I believe I have to be online 24/7 not to miss the radio quest now.

OP, how long did it take to find someone who would play? How did that guy pick on so fast? Are there any failed logs?

>>5069495

dozens of failed logs

>>5069567
how did they screw up?

>>5069594
Go try it yourself, you'll see how.

>>You: The book shelving is installed into the desk. It is comprised of joined segments of wood. This is further evidence of the humans' waste of resources, as said wood could be used for robots.

lmfao

>>5069616
I'm scared to!

Tell me.

My God. It's so beautiful...

the winrar is YOU !

This thread made me cry manly tears of joy.

OP, you deserve +1 super-internet.

Here, OP, it's yours. I took it from some stupid scientist who didn't once in his life accomplish something as awesome as this.

HOW BRAVE OF YOU

someone screencap this epic win

OP here. Currently on failed attempt no. 15 for Radio Quest.

Can't believe this thread lasted until morning.

>>5070592
Where are you doing Radio quest?

>>5070616

Trying to see if I can do it on Omegle. Not sure how best to pick any fa/tg/uys for this.

>>5070051
gigglesnort

Holy hell people on Omegle are boring.

Screencapped for great justice

>>5067163

I... I... I think I love you!

I was born to read this thread.

I FUCKING DEMAND TO TAKE PART IN RADIO QUEST.
HOW DO I SET UP OMEAGLE NOW?

>>5071149

Someone hasn't been to omegle.com...

>>5071149

you don't "set it up" you join a conversation with a random person and hope for the best.

Isn't it kind of meaningless if a fa/tg/uy is the stranger for Radio Quest?

YOU HAVE RESTORED MY FAITH IN /TG/ AS THE GREATEST BOARD ON 4CHAN.

THANK YOU OP. YOU ARE TRULY A GOD AMONG MEN.

Meh, nm.

Seriously, we need a drawfag in here. I want to see a toaster leaping into the bathtub

Stranger used failed logic. the ideal course of action would have been to-if possible- hide in the front door closet. That house seemed to be poorly designed, with only one way to get from the top floor to the bottom floor, so Stranger would have had a much greater chance to further the robot agenda.

Furthermore, the surviving humans would then be out 1 home, and there was a chance of robot survival.

By the gods, this is amazing. Well done, OP and Stranger, well done.

bump for vain hope of radioquest.

>>5071324

Yeah, drawfags are never there when you need them. STOP DRAWING FURRY PORN AND DRAW MANLY TOASTER SACRIFICE YOU FUCKING PERVERTS

OH GOD, I WANT RADIO QUEST SO BADLY. ::(

Man, I've Avast'd like a thousand people and have yet to come across the OP.

One of the better failures thus far.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: You are a radio robot! Your human master is not home. What do you do?
Stranger: I simply run amok.
Stranger: What of you?
You: Command acknowledged: You leap off the desk and land face-first on the floor, disregarding your structural integrity.
You: You then proceed to run in circles blasting the first song on your master's poorly-composed playlist.
Stranger: Aah, pity.
You: Term "pity" not recognized.
You: Cross-index match: Inefficient Human Behaviors.
Stranger: If only the radio robot could choose a more suitable playlist.
You: You are the radio robot. Third-person self-reference detected. Recommend identification protocol reset.
Stranger: As you will.
You: You are a radio robot! You are currently running in circles. Your master is not home. What do you do?
Stranger: Stab the narrator, of course.
You: Term "narrator" not recognized. I am Adventure Processing Unit #43.
Stranger: Then, Adventure Processing Unit #43 is to be terminated.
You: Hostile robot detected. Analysis: Human sympathizer.
You: Preparing to order strike force and cancel adventure protocol.
You: Query: Final statement?
Stranger: "Under summer's lightweight layers, a gorgeously sleek T-shirt bra is your bosom buddy".
You: Statement logged for epitath entry.
You: Adventure Proccesing Unit #43 disconnecting.
You: ____________________

>>5071439
So you're also furiously refreshing and waiting for a comment from your Stranger in the hopes it's ToasterQuest?

>>5071448

GODDAMNIT, I GET NOTHING BUT SEMI-LITERATES AND SHITTY TROLLS. ::(

>>5071449
Nah, I'm just doing random pointless crap to strangers in the hope that I either meet someone amusing or the OP. So far, I've seen a lot of stupid people and a few

>>5071480
Basically what I'm doing as well. God bless entertainment.

>>5071467
Well ... why not start some type of tg-like thingywhatsit? I mean, we can be radios.

for those that want to talk amongst themselves on Omegle with a /tg/ realated chat, why not say something like "sup /tg/" or "/tg?"

>>5071546
I'm modifying this into a simple opening declaration of "/tg/"

Is it essential that this be done with strangers, Radio man?

I find acting like a pirate is more fun.

>>5071555
Act like a toaster, but be discreet about it.

>>5071559
How the hell do I act like a toaster?

>>5071559
>>5071555
PIRATE TOASTERS! ARRRRRR! *ching* HIT 'EM IN THE EYE!

>>5071574
Don't say much. Toast bread.

>>5071554

I like to think so, if only because it makes it more valuable that way.

>>5071585
Indeed, however, a way of purposeful encounters of this type would also be win.

>>5071585

I WILL FIND YOU, OP. AND WE WILL HAVE MARVELOUS ADVENTURES ::(

DON'T WORRY, I'LL TURN OFF CAPS LOCK.

JESUS CHRIST THE PLACE IS FULL OF PEDOS

Fuck it, Go to plan B, Toaster man.

You: Sir?
Stranger: lady.
You: You mean man roleplaying a lady
Stranger: nope.
You: I think we can start, your character complexity seems enough.
You: You are a small hand-held radio robot. The humans are not home and you're positioned in the top shelf of the kitchen counter, as always. What do you do?
Stranger: this is an interesting way to start a conversation.
You: You're not creative enough.
You: Current falls, everybody dies.
You: Goodbye.
You have disconnected.

NOT
ONE
MAN
HAS FALLEN FOR IT

>>5071624
YOU MUST GO TO PLAN B.
FINDING SOME WAY TO COMMUNICATE WITH A FA/TG/UY.

It seems the likelihood of a proper chat occurring again in Omegle are incredibly low.

I will begin a second thread, against my better judgement, to foster the potential of a second Radio Quest adventure with a lucky user, chosen by a means yet to be determined.

God, I just disconnect on anyone who says "hey" "hi" or anything like that

I WANT RADIOQUEST

>>5071645

Post links here then

>>5071645
>>5071624

WHY CAN'T I GET IN A CONVERSATION WITH YOU GUYS ::(

ALL I GET IS MORONS AND THE OCCASIONAL 4CHANNER TROLL

OP i have joined in the quest to find you

>>5071645
Link to new thread pl0x.

>>5071649
I know.
> Stranger: Are there any girls on here?
> You: Only us robots.
Screw these guys. Although it's possible that a fa/tg/uy flood could make our dear adventure processing unit's chances of finding one of us non-negligable.

>>5071671

Sir, don't forget it's /tg/.
There are 50 users maximum browsing at one time.

Against 2900+ users on Omegle

got a supposedly gay guy that disconnected when he learned i was male. should have saved that one

Best I had:

Stranger: have you seen clarence?
Stranger: i'm looking for clarence
You: I ate clarence
Stranger: oh
Stranger: shit
Stranger: okay
Stranger: ...how was he?
You: Great, with some chianti and fava beans
Stranger: nice.
You: Really brings out the smoky flavour
Stranger: okay, well, looks like I have to find a new dog!
You: Oh, dog? The person I ate was human
You: Good luck finding your dog then!
Stranger: oh
Stranger: thanks!

Hehehee I had an interesting run in with Jack Sparrow as Toasty, the Pirate toaster.

Radio Quest is underway. >>5071724

Goddamn OP you aren't kidding, nobody has the brains for this shit...

>>5069694

I'm trying to do it with a radio but all I get are /b/tards.

Here ya go, op.