The GM started the session by announcing that we all have bounties on our heads because of the office building incident last week. Darias, our vindictive swordsman, already with a 20k bounty on his head from the start of the game now has 35k bounty because of being the getaway driver. Anyone asking why Zus's bounty is 15k obviously did not read last week's adventure, unless you're wondering why it isn't higher. The rest of us have 5k bounties for being accessories. We have two contacts that have given us jobs so far. Grey Tombstone, the cop, can no longer see us because of our status putting his job at risk. Dread Tombstone, the gangster, now loves us, he finds us hilarious. Darias already had a Wuxing assassin on his ass, related to his back story. Zus now ALSO has a Wuxing assassin because of whose building he 'sploded. On top of this, remember the dog he kicked last time? The owner is rather pissed and is out for blood. On learning all this Zus stoically comments "QUEER ASS HEADSHOT!"

Both Tombstones have insisted we avoid Yakuza and Wu-Xing, especially since several high-profile bounty hunters have recently entered the city in search of our growing bounties. Because of this we are lacking for local jobs this week and we start our story by going to Dread Tombstone's club for some income with a smuggling run. On the way to Tombstone's we stop for a lawn chair, you'll find out why in a bit. When we get there Darias takes the Baja around back to be loaded up with small arms for the out-trip and straps the lawn chair to the top. Lia the jumpy adept and I stay behind while everyone else flies off in the Baja to the Salish tribe in the middle of the desert East of Seattle with Zus sitting up top playing air guitar to Orkish death metal.

Oh yeah, this story was awesome last time.

A boarder lay between Seattle and the Salish, which was no problem for Darias as he was a gun runner before being rounded up and thrown in jail. With his smartjammer he disappears from their sensor network and goes off road. Lucky for the dwarf he remembers where Zus is and warns him to strap in. Being the dwarfy bastard he is Zus hooks his pipe wrenches to his belt, attaches them to the roof rack and goes back to his air guitar. Greg the thief, unmentioned up to this point for a lack of action, was not as fortunate. Despite an abundance of seating Greg was stuck in the boot of Baja without straps because of Darias' dislike for whiny emo bastard.

Meanwhile back in the club Lia went dancing while I sat at the bar keeping an eye out for anything unusual. At one point a man in robes with a sword a half foot taller than him strapped to his back comes up to me and introduces himself as Phantom. Stupid me, I use my fake SIN name which is of course the one that got tied to the Wuxing building incident last week when I tell him I'm a fixer. We make idle chat in which I learn nothing as Lia continues to shake it on the dance floor. Phantom moves on after a while to peruse the club more and I go back to my drink, soon after I see him go into the back room with a lady on his arms with obvious intentions. Dread Tombstone comes up to me a little after to ask who the guy that went into the back room was, turns out we each thought the other knew him. Tombstone as other things to worry about, so I hang around the bar watching the door five feet away from me. A while later Phantom and the woman emerge, both looking rather satisfied. I told him that Tombstone was interested in talking to him and pointed him out.

Back in the desert the gun runner team had gotten to the Salish without a hitch and got a new load of heavy weapons to replace the small arms that had been brought out. Zus was a hit at the outpost, offering in fractured English to plumb anything. Unfortunately I missed most of this because I the player was busy getting dinner together while my character was being boring and Pockets sucks at note taking. So far I've neglected to mention Rio the demonic gerbil sprite that serves as the Baja's autopilot and the AI responsible for the brilliant plan of waiting for the courier right outside of his office building. For one reason or another he projected his hologram above the Baja to talk to Zus and is immediately met with the only reaction that can be expected from a dwarven Russian plumber playing air guitar to death metal that has been startled by a floating demonic gerbil. Zus swung the nearest heavy object at Rio, and succeeded his attack. Of course Rio was a hologram and just laughed his demonic gerbil laugh and carried on with whatever it meant to do.

Lia met a cute guy and had sex with him. Around this time the rest of the team has returned to the club with the load of heavy weapons they picked up from the Salish in the desert. Naturally, the first thing Zus does while Darias takes the Baja around back is run into the club and kick in the door to back room out of curiosity. Guess where Lia and her new fridnd are. Being his uncouth self, his first reaction is to steal the clothes she had left on the floor by the couch Kia and Jeremy are screwing on. , Zus is in and out before I could even get to the it, remember the door is five feet away from me. Kia is rather upset and everyone else is rather confused. Zus runs out of the club and dumps her clothing in the Baja before continuing in the direction of GTFO via sewer. Being a plumber with a thing for sewers, he jumps into the nearest manhole. He has taken ranks in running, has high agility, and amazing luck with dice. He basically winds up being to the sewer what Jesus was to the water and runs across the shit. For some reason he has decided that my penthouse was GTFO, despite the fact that I always keep it locked. He arrives while we're calming down a panicking Lia who is now wearing Jeremy's t-shirt. She still has more clothing than most of the women in the club. Sadly, two of our characters (the amourer and a so far unmentioned thief) had to leave. Just after Zus gets to my place and notices that my door is unlocked.

As he searches the penthouse Zus thinks to call in the rest of the team, who arrive shortly after. My place is untouched except for some missing small, expensive things. I have security cameras and about 2.5 hours were missing from the footage. I complain to the condominium security and no one knowns anything. Given the difficulty to hack expensive security systems or the cost to bribe the security of this place, obviously the bounty hunters have tracked me down and we all GTFO. Our auto pool consists of the Baja, a limo, and a quiver of motorcycles. Lia hops on her moped, Darias hops in the Baja with Phantom and Tombstone and I get in the limo with Zus as we drive off to his hovel. We have a trouble with low profile. We notice about halfway there that we're being followed, we stop at a light, I jump out and walk back to the other car. It pulls a u-turn and gets the hell out of there. We run the plates and find that it has no digital trail, its related to my penthouse break-in. Phantom, now revealed to be a professional bounty hunter being paid by Tombstone to keep us alive tells us to not follow the damn bounty hunter. We send the limo's chauffeur off to find his own safe place and continue on to Zus's hovel in (slightly) lower profile.

Zus is a squatter, living on the bottom floor of a three story abandoned building. First thing we notice on walking in is the number of rats that have taken up residence with Zus. Lia shrieks and jumps on my back to get off the floor while Phantom quickly pulls out his sword and skewers the lot. Darias decides they'll be good eating and goes off to clean and cook them. Given the lack of plumbing, the place has a literal shithole that goes through each floor down to the basement. While we're all sitting around bored trying to figure out what to do next Zus (first time he's been there while under player control) starts building a bit of basic plumbing so that he can shit without worry of others doing likewise above. While he builds this shit pipe Lia heads back to her place alone to shower and get some proper clothes. By this point you should all know that we're newbish enough that no one followed her to make sure she would be alright. The bounty hunters were waiting for her when she got out of the shower back home. There's nothing she can do, the bounty hunter she can see has a sword and gun on the table before him and she's unarmed ten feet away. He questions her to fact-check their information, a questioning she answers without hesitation while mentioning she was only a bystander. When he's done asking questions Lia is told she can put her commlink back on, immediately calling for help while the other bounty hunter comes in and confers with the first. We instantly spring into action, expecting to have to rescue Lia.

We get to her apartment just as the bounty hunters are leaving. You may expect them to do something sensible like climbing the stairs to the roof to be picked up or leaving by the ground entrance, but where would the fun be in that? One bounty hunter hopped on the other's back and the one carrying the other fucking jumped out the window, grabbing the window ledge above and pulling himself up. He then proceeded to climb the building as if he were leapfrogging vertically. The lot of us gawk for a moment before taking potshots at them, the few that connect being stopped by body armor. With bullets failing us, four party members get it into their heads to race to the rooftop. Lia uses her adept powers to repeat the bounty hunters' stunt, Darias finds a drainpipe to climb, Zus uses his pipe wrenches like ice picks in a glacier to pull himself up the building, I take the elevator. Darias has the common sense quality and informs the rest of us that the roof is not a good place to go to. One quick about face later and we're all back on the ground, watching as the men leap into a passing helicopter. Zus had rode his motorcycle there and being the quick 'thinker' he is, jumps on it and chases the helicopter. The rest of us can do nothing but watch from the Baja behind as he pulls out a large rifle and takes a pot shot at the helicopter. The amazing luck of Zus holds and he actually hits the damn thing in the rotor hub, guaranteeing a crash. Turns out there is a 2-for-1 deal on crashes at that moment. Although Zus had amazing combat skills he is lacking in driving skills, meaning that the whole shooting a gun thing messed up his control of the motorcycle.

The ensuing accident is so horrible that I'm glad I had a camera built into my glasses. The recoil of the rifle knocks the bike off balance and into the other lane, where it bounces off the hood of a car and is flung into a light post. The bike wraps around the post as Zus is flung into a bus stop. Zus hits the ground hard and puts up a good fight, but the ground wins. When we pull up, Zus' left side is broken. Having a couple of qualities improving his toughness, he's still conscious and complaining. Not wanting to put up with his whining, Darias has someone give Zus a quarter kilo of the Bliss we stole during the shootout last session. I call up Tombstone asking about a safe house, he directs me to the warehouse we shot up Yakuza in and stole the Bliss from. Apparently in the time since our rescue of Zus and Lia from there Dread Tombstone has co-opted it into his list of properties. Lia insists we give Zus something from a medkit to wake him up so that he can help us get him inside. I have no clue why no one stopped her, but Zus was not happy when he woke up from his drug-induced stupor. I call up the chauffeur to make sure he is okay, share the video of Zus' combined epic win and failure, and after a brief pause punctuated by swearing, am asked to shoot Zus if he ever tries to get in the front of the Limo.

This concludes week two of That Fucking Dwarf. See you next week, /tg/

Pretty funky game you have there. I think I'll need to read up on some SR4 stuff and get a game going myself. As much as I'd like to play, if it takes GMing to play SR, I'll do it.

>>5483862
Next summer we're going to finally cycle out the GM, he hasn't actually played a game of ANYTHING in about five years