well fuck, it's about time. where the /tg/ freestylers at?

tough crowd tonight...

little pink humie, wavin your swordz an muckkin about
when the boyz ride in, you iz best fail leadership and face about
Youz can do nottin but scatter, know da fear in your heart
cuz our guns bring the dakka even if da trucks fall apart

mah boyz are da best and we take what we needz
we eat tyranids fohr brekfest an make tables from space mahreenz
you iz fought da liches, da dragons an da weak
but you iz nevar seen Waaaaghmillionaire standin at da peak
marshalin the warhost, to turn da guard into compost, to make humies inta rumproast
you iz best run along, da assault phase is here, cuz when the boyz get in melee, its moar dakka in ur rear

scamper off little' mahn, pray to da Emperor for Exterminatus,
mah boyz an me cova dis world, 'till nuthin left to hurl, till da orks is the bestust

run fo ur life, go back ta mommys inn
cuz when the warboss rides, he donna run from you fightan men

Humies is good for 2 things, lootan an food
sword n board dont get it, his stand at da mic is crude
when do ya git it in your metal humie head
dat da orkz is the orkiest, an da rest belong in bed

I iz seen tau fight da eldar, nurglemen turn guards inta crap
but I iz neva seen a metal humie who dinks he can rap
youz silence speaks gold, like ol nurgley got ya tongue
maybe slaneesh turn your dik into warts an sponge
did khorne kill ya humie? o, I iz forget
he only kills da strong, and you iz clearly just anotha git

i is bashing you so bad
da picture got forgot, i hope u iz glad

Sword 'n' Board? You leave me sorta bored,
But you won't get ignored--send you to the handicapped ward,
They won't even believe how hard you got burned
Like a 1-hit die zombie, you gonna get turned,
So let them know where you want your body interred.
I think you're lower than dirt, as you may have inferred,
And you should be deterred, so better put down that sword.
You see, I'm a Sidhe, king of all that I see,
Pay attention--you better be listening to me,
In the Feywild I've rapped for a whole century,
And you'll have to agree, that you never can be
As amazing as me, so drop your dignity
And fall to one knee, pledge alliegance to me:
MC Sidhe, and you'll see that I will always stay wild--
I got more rhymes than there are leaves in the Feywild.

>>5822286
Pic related--it's me.

One-na you boyz call da eldar, der little brat iz loose
he musta gotten lost in a waaaagh and barely escaped an ork noose
I iz told sword n board and I iz tell you elfy man
No earrin's or pinkies allowed, 'cause tzeenth ruinz your plan
Da meks and da nobs reduce da enemy to der feet
and da meganob runs tripply wounds deep
so da forest beware and eladrin run wild
cuz da orks is a commin, an we wont be beguiled

you guys are getting owned by the ork

>>5822384
>>5822376
samefag

>>5822384
>>5822441

samefag

>>5822459
>>5822459
Samefag

>>5822441
>>5822459
>>5822465

fucking samefag

>>5822465
>>5822459
>>5822441
Daytime /tg/.

>>5822481

its 8:30

Will no one challenge these sucka MCs?

>>5822522
>Negi
Get the fuck out, cancer.

>>5822530

Do you see a tripcode? It's some faggot

>>5821986

Orks on Greyhawk? Someone's been hittin' the fluff,
I like the cut of yo' jib, you knows how to play it rough,
But enough's enough, you've overstayed my hospitality,
They say geniuses pick green, but you ain't got the mentality,
I'm always down for slayin' some green anatomy,
You about to be a casualty, cuz' with every yell,
you're showin' a deep-seeded hatred for Mr. Spell,
I damn near fell over reading, your brain's having some outages,
I got cleric on call just to cast Comprehend Languages
I'll inflict critical wounds that'll need more than bandages,
but for savages, you orks got me at a loss,
In another time and place you'd be calling me Warboss,
But I got no problems turnin' your kind into pesto sauce,
You've crossed the wrong human, I ain't comin' undone,
I stole the Emprah's wife, she gave birth to a Thousand Sons,
I'm pullin' shit more hax than Leman Russ teamin' up with Pun Pun,
And I ain't even begun, I'll show you who's got the dakka,
I've mastered the martial arts before you even held yo' first choppa,
I'm an all out rocker, I'll stick two swords in the green, and one in your face--that's the fuckin' SHOCKER

>>5822542

Oh my, little humie, you haz some bite in ur bark
too bad mah 2+ armor save makes u look like a lark
Youz can insult mah spellin an say mah brain aint right
but we both know you iz a naked guardsman in a fight
cuz I fought in all da battles, from Terra ta Iornis
I is see cityfighterz scavenge fo food from an ancient ford taurus
so when u say u want a humie for a wife, be mah guest
cuz I already tasted humie honeys, an deys tolerable at best
Waaaaghmillionaire only has time for sexy lady spoils
that buck an ride like a truck an come with shocks an recoil
and put da clerics away, dey aint gonna even cast cleanse
youz rhymes are so bad, no wonder mah rhyme waaaagh dont make sense

so put ur choppa on ya belt and get on ya pony
da orks 'ave a world to pillage, an da boyz need some mo' forties

>>5822286

There's a fungus among us, frontin' like he's fly
You might conquer worlds, all yo' opponents might die,
But when I look at your horde all I see is an infinite food supply,
I dare to defy, I don't need exterminatus,
I pile dead orks so high, they're touchin' cirrostratus,
And yo' mekboyz gone awry with rusty apparatus,
It's gonna take more than orky willpower to move those hunks of lead,
I'm moving faster, once I'm seein' red,
Best thing about orks is that they still fight after ya' remove the head!

Keep it coming, aside from the faggot anons. I fucking love the ork

aw shit son, we back.

>>5822960

Da orks were made ta fight an fight again
iz no surprise you try da cut off our heads
but if u try to eat us, all you iz find
arr psychology iz wrathful, arr meat leaves u blind
when u stumble through da grimdark, watch out for da green tide
we is cover da imperium in bitz an lead
we is takkin your leadas and makin 'em dead
an some of us even eat da head
we iz takin you psykers and puttin ur jollies in a bin
so let da warp hear ur cries, I dink Chaos needz some mo quid

you iz fightan well, youz honor coulda prevailed
if youz hadn't wandered into an errant Void Whale
say 'ello to Azgra da Slasher for me an Gragnatz
cuz I is got pirates ta nuke and little girls ta put in space napz
Youz can call us all rustins, dubbins, sporeboyz and crayonz
but galactic conquest iz da only agenda dat stands
so let da Waaaaghmillionaire through, or we gunna throw ya body in tha sands

I say, what a roaring bout this is turning out to be!

>>5823193

Too many waaaaaaghs have left this ork hallucinating,
I battle nonstop, and I'm only accelerating,
I'm powerfully detonating while you orks are germinating,
and I put the Blood Angels to shame when it comes to exsanguinating,
And your rhymes are harmless, like a bard prestidigitating,
It ain't worth debating, to an ork so whacked
I'll burn you down so hard, there ain't no chance of comin' back,
you tryin' to play like you green, but you more white than Candlejack,
crackin' out fluff codexes ju

This isn't the first time I've interloped
All ye who enter here, abandon hope
I'm about to tear it up, in a fashion most dope,
listening to your rhymes, I can hardly cope
Each verse worse than the last, on a slippery slope,
Soon you will bow down, and declare me Rap Pope,
I'm coming for you all, you're in my scope
Candlejack is on the prowl, looks like I'm gonna need more rope.

>>5823387

WHAAAAAAAAAT

Goddamn candlejack ruins everyt

>>5823387

Spookyz an spirits can make a humie der bitch
but da boyz in da mekz don't got time fer faggot tricks
Tell da Gretchin ta fetch me ammo, tell da Kommandos to lock n load
The only right state fer a spirit is in da warp, full o choad
We iz never gonna stop, our orky wrath iz diabollic
The warcries of 'Ard Boyz make you go catatonic
We iz da plague, million times worse than bubonic
Da loot belongs to us, the dirt for you to choke ons it

>>5823387
Now just a damn second,
don't get me wrong we're glad you came.
But isn't this a bit unfair
they can't say your name
I'm a little new at this so don't mad
but I think the way this'll end'll be fucking sad
Check it.
The battle's going on everything is all good.
Then some idiot says Candlejack
there goes the neighbo

>>5823514

>>5823514

Dat musta been old gregg, that the spirit just got
cause hes got a mangina, wes knows dat is hot
to faggot ghostys who bust in, try da cause fear
but we all knows better, deys just a sheet on a queer

Fucking post mooooooore.

>>5823378
>>5823387
>>5823429
>>5823514
gb2/b/

>>5823636

age for the only fucking good thread tonight

so i descend from my throne to enter the battledome, and i notice that im practially alone? on my own? the freestyle seed we had sown have succumbs to drought, /tg/ let me hear the drums and shout "bring the freestylers back! not this barely rhyming green hack!" got to say though, hes tickled my bone ribs, coz everyone knows that 40k is for kids. green tide? lime puddle, as they scramble for numbers, and huddle together because they know alone they are weak, postpone next time you speak, check your spelling for gods sake.
S&B got it rolling as usual, anything but casual, not usually teammates but strange alliances make when enemies are whole settings away.
or should i say, whole settings below? fo' sho /tg/

>>5823454

Don't think I'm done, I ain't even hurt much,
Candlejizz attacked and I showed him the meaning of ghost-touched,
Motherfucker tried to grab me, I ripped off his nuts,
He'll be walkin' with crutches, but he's comparatively fortunate,
there ain't no room in my crew for green-skinned subordinates,
I've got yo' coordinates, so hiding is futile,
I'll run up on an ork, and show you I'm brutal.
my refusal of your kind is a daemonseed,
I'm blendin' universes so smoothly, all yo' boyz shoutin' CREEEEED,
My style exceeds, but I know orks don't concede,
You don't have to say a word, all you gotta do is bleed.

>>5823681

Sup DeepLich, you ready to get up in this?

>>5823681
Fuck nevermind, I see you already are up in this. Nice rhymes. This ork is good competition.

I was going to post the rap I made about Ibram Gaunt here, but it seems it'd be monstrously out of place.

I guess it'll just have to wait til the next rap thread.

Oi oi oi,
Check ya'self humies ya ain't got no game
Ya puny skulls just add to me fame
My boots a crushin' and your brains a mushin'.
I hear ya girly cries unda my treads
Ya kids and ya wives comfy in dey beds
My boys come crashin' in an OFF WIT DEY 'EADS
If yous try to save em we'll feed you wit leads
And paint ya whole town wif shades a reds

>>5823717
Oh snap!

>>5823681

Now we knowz flesh is weak, but dis is just sad
A humie made of bones, cause he got hit by hiz dad
Youz come bustin in like a shifty lich lurker
The only humie you entertain iz a social worker
Take yer ghost tears and magic spells back to Ravenloft
Da only curse youz gonna give me iz a case o magic cough
Go back to yer little fightin boys, s'preadsheetz an hambread
Da orks 'ave taken da field, youz only hope iz to pray to someone wit cred

Oh shit, it's on, niggaz.

Hope some of the other MC's are about.

Newcomer Waaaaghmillionaire's looking fly though.

>>5823801

(That was me, if it wasn't obvious)

>>5823769

Who ordered the pizza? Digiorno or delivery?
You're rhyme's storebought, it's straight up mimicry,
But I'm on to your trickery, your flavor ain't gonna appease,
You topped with pepperoni, but I ordered anchovies,
I'm tossing this pizza like it's a disease,
Pepperoni in the house, crust stuffed with extra CHEESE

>>5823681
MC Sidhe here, you know that when I get started you're gonna be hurtin', audience cheering like I just cast Mass Charm Person, but here's a Suggestion, no charge, keep your platinum: Your rhymes? Fire whoever's been writin' em! Motherfucker, I spit rhymes like they're Magic Missiles, so sit back and let me get some truth up in this: you don't have a Fear Aura, son... you're just hideous.

>>5823964

This

We're the Kings of mechanical prowess
Marchin across the battlefield
silent as the mornin mist
Fear us, for we can not be killed

Flesh made all of metal
You know you can't battle our mettle
An iron will have we
Our flayed ones wear your flesh with glee
Inside and outside, through and through
Necrons are sportin far more power than you
Humans are fleshy, they fall and they die
But none of my kins' bodies
On a battlefield lies

Humans can't stop our wave
Our flood they can not stave
Ya'll have got it bad, better be brave
When all my home boys get up from their grave

Niggas might think im trollin,
but im simply rollin'
with ma sharped bastard sword,
well, it is simply cardboard,
it is not bad to "pretend"
with elven preety friend...

DJ, DJ, rewind the track,
Cos it's about time for a Spoony Bard attack!
Don't worry SnB I've got your back,
Now Waaaaghmillionaire, don't givie me flak,
We all know your rhymes are all wack,
Against me we all you your façade will crack,
Epic level rhymes sending you way off track,
Taking you out of this battle like a cap to the dome!
And Deeplich? Go back to your throne,
We didn't come here to listen to you drone,
Though to be fair I could toss you a bone...
Oh wait! That's all you are! You'd best just head home!

>>5824081
More like MC Sucky Bard.

>>5823978

Fight the big ones, ignore the small fry,
That's the code of the warrior, obey it or die,
But now the ork's fled the scene, you're next on the block,
Spittin' rhymes so foul, ain't no way I forgot.
So I'm boring, huh? You think of that yourself?
It ain't my place to amuse little tree-humpin' elves,
Only thing you a king of is weak rhymes and whack style,
There's a damn good reason I never set foot in the Feywild!
More like FeyMILD, because your rhymes ain't nothing but grunting,
You aimin' for the bleachers, but barely even bunting.

Take it home, DeepLich

>>5823839
suckas barely even in this game! hes so dumb he forgets his own name! this "warboss" is tame and its a shame, i was hoping for a satisfactory meal, not this congealed algae.
>>5823801
sorry if im taking a while, actually no, fuck you. i play by my own style and i have better things to do, such as humbling even Mary Sue, i dont care if shes so "sweet" she befriended a grue, bring them to me and theyll both be through.
orks are so dense you they invent, only to loot is thier intent,so ive been sent to prove the intelligent are the true masters of battle, unlike the crude swarm tactics of your cattle, and im laughing over your death rattle.
you say bones are weak? i think thats what you said but you can barely even speak, the bones are metaphoric because my true power is beyond cosmic, its meant to be ironic and its a shame you are so thick you dont get it. im powered by souls, horde two miles deep of gold, im a dark engine of combat, i exist to destroy life like deer exist for the big cat, i kill and im the best at it, (un)live for your death, so come and receive eternal rest.
>>5823746
its all good my man, everythings to plan. /tg/ is freestylers down! i encourage more people to jump in, trying rhymin' aint no big thing!

>>5823964
Ya say ya want pizza an here's da delivery
Here's ya face on a silva platter fo three
Dat three is Mork Gork an' me
We feast on ya flesh an' we feed on ya bones
But our tummies has still got da groans
Cos yo shit ain't worth da stones.
Hey Mr. Warrior can't you sees
ya skin ya soul it didn't quite please
Ya rap game is da disease I see
And ya rhyme is what I cease to be.

Deep within yo lives and deep within yo minds
yall be sleepin still I'm creepin all up on you from behind
while I'm chillin in my city r'lyeh deep beneath the brine
still I find a little time to bust a move and busty a rhyme
yall besta roll for sanity 'cause I'm a nightmare no doubt
tearin hairs from yo skull, pull yo own eyes out
me an' all mah Great Old Homies gonna come up in yo scene
make the fellas eat each other and the bitches wanna scream
Throwin up Elder Signs every motha fuckin day
Betta run yo ass inside, 'cause now it's Mi-Go's turn ta play!

I'm a flyin fungus, bitch
just you try an' flunk us, bitch
we been doin quantum physics since you was a monkey, bitch.
We been cruisin' all you losers and yo shitty planets too
We abductin all yo women and we put em in our zoo
'cause yo momma is an animal - at least she was last night
If you try an' represent, yo we ain't even got to fight
Bust out our technology an' then we put out yo' lights.

>>5824152
>they cant invent
fixed.
holy shit, the idiocy is rubbing off on me.

I still think Phylactery, the guy from the original thread, was the best rapper.

Too bad I haven't seen him in a while.


Also, AWWW SHIT CTHULHU UP IN THIS BITCH

When I say Shadow, you say Innsmouth
Shadow!
(Innsmouth)
Shadow!
(Innsmouth)
Our geometry is non-euclidian
this ain't an idiom
I'm the muthafuckin' top dawg Amphibian
Hydra is mah momma and Dagon is my pops
You found out about our secret? Go ahead an' call tha cops
'cause our people are unnumbered - we be spawnin' every day
We can steal away yo women, take em to tha sea to play
They all come where it's better
'cause you know we make 'em wetter
Now they under our spell; we got 'em wearin a red letter
A for Adultery, A for ass
You never go back once you've had a 12-inch bass
Got the Mythos in this bitch, drivin mortal men mad
now I'm gonna pass tha mike to my dear old dad

>>5824076

First the Ork, now here comes more 40k crew,
A necron on the scene, with nothin' better to do.
Mary Sue called, you ain't grimdark enough,
Better dig down deep in yo' codexes for fluff
What you see is what you get, I don't need hax to be tough,
But I find it rough, when you roll up with 'crons,
flauntin' your class trash, gettin' all up ons,
somewhere down the line, you must have missed,
that all of yo' weaponry is based on my fists!
The Ork was spittin' fierce, but I done told 'em,
You spendin' hours paintin' figures, but I'm just gonna roll 'em,
Forty thousand 40k'ers and I just scolded 'em,
You 'crons best split before I call down a neutronium golem

>>5824145
Oi Mr. Warrior don' let me stop
If my last rap yo tryin' to top
You'd best believe I'm pickin' up da mop
To clean up yo rhyme dat I did just drop
Now let me get started on ya formal wear
Da silly shinies dat you do bare
Normally wif humies I couldn't care
But ya silly accord just makes me stare!
Not cos' I'm jealous, not cos' I'm gay
I'm sure ya' heard otha' greenskins say
It's cos' dem' metals can't keep da grots at bay.
Mr. Warrior da papers clean off da' press
Dis' humies lookin' like Xena da Princess!

>>5824265

Sorry, I just feel like you're doing a good job rebutting yourself. Don't let me stop you.

Father Dagon represent!
All my children make me proud to be their old man
I'm a Great Old One with a great old plan
When you see me bitch you better hope you fail your san
'cause I'm down with the Deep and into yo house I'll creep
I'll bring about the kind of darkness that wakes Cthulhu from his sleep
I eat mortals for dinner and Shoggoths for dessert
Don't even try to step up 'cause you know I'll bring the hurt
You'll see me in your nightmares and when you close your eyes
You'll see me in those aeons when even death dies
I'll be burned into yo soul so bad you'll wanna be eaten
Now I'm out, but hey DJ, don't drop the beat!

>>5824488
Somebody failed his san check.

>>5824562

If I was good at rap, I wouldn't reply to every shitty rap post in the thread calling me out.

>>5824662
> If I was good at rap, I wouldn't be doing it on /tg/

FTFY champ. All the rappers here are shit, myself included. If you tried to put any of this shit to a beat, it would collapse in moments. As such, calling someone out doesn't make me any more shit or any more good at rap.

>>5824468

You discovered it yourself, I'm Sword n' Board to others: Mr. Warrior to you,

-Check it-

When the day is done and I return from a pillage,
I'm packin' more gold than you've got teeth in yo' village.
The sight of my advance gives you anal spillage,
turns your bones to cartilage, no wonder they call you pizza,
You so clogged with cheese my rhymes can hardly reach 'ya,
Orks must be creatures built to suffer pain,
You keep comin' back but you're incurably lame,
Meanwhile, Lovecraftian posers got me going insane,
Step down from the mic, I'm taking different aim.

>>5824553
Look at dis' bloke,
a walkin' talkin' shark
Tryin' to make his mark
Attemptin' to spin somefin' dark
Just stop
Before I call me boys
An' we pull out our shiny toys
An' have our joys a' makin noise
OI!
Ya ain't got a chance
As our bullets and ya head make sweet romance,
Ya said ya last words now say ya goodbyes
Cause you'd be surprised how fast lead flies.
Now we ain't no punk boys
We ain't just gonna shoot
We'll show ya da bottom of our boot
As we kick yer ass back into the sea
Where ya shoulda stuck wif flippers
Just like Free Willy

>>5824712

This is more fun to me than actually playing any of these games. It's just another game, is all.

>>5824774
I got no problem with that. In fact, I agree. Just thought it was awful silly of someone to call me out in a /tg/ rap battle thread for calling someone else out in a /tg/ rap battle thread. If I didn't think it was fun I wouldn't have posted 4 times. I just have no illusions about my shit rapping skills.

God damn I love these threads

Everybody give it up for The Warp god of Rap, The Demon prince of Rhyme and an all around bad mother fucker... Kharn The Betrayer!

What In Khornes name?
It's such a shame that fame
has drained the wits from your brains.
You think your a killer, cold thriller?
Fighting in inn's and caves
and some old fuckers grave?

I've been there and back and Ive found a lack
Of worthy foes and Khorn knows Ive left a track
Of Foes defeated,
Armies depleted
and stupid fuckers deleted.
Bodies and corpses
locked in Rigor mortis
Each sad sight a knight
who thought he could fight
With the Chosen of chaos
and they all got out classed.
Every one defiled
their copses piled
By my axe Gorechild.

When The warp portals open the planet quakes
When I raise my axe The Imperium shakes
These Berserker aint fakes
They aint cutting no brakes.
They're gonna slit your throat and of your blood they'll partake

Your style is clearly slipshod and horribly flawed.
So sit ther slack jawed and be over awed
From The warp we've clawed on an unholy jihad
All the Cultists say it with me BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!
Emptying towns and lairs
like your like your some viking raider

>>5824726
Ya must not understand da Ork poise
How we keep comin' back just wif more boys
Now I told ya once and I done told ya twice
a humie just don't take no advice
Now ya better be ready wif feet steady
Cause when push comes ta shove
Orks don't play nice.

Ya say you packin' gold, more den me
But ya got no place to put it, for I can't see
Any pockets on that dat skirt wearin' humie
I got an idea, try it on for size
Ya head must be big to be so wise
Make like ya mum and put it in between my thighs
Ofcourse I'm being theoretical
I'd peg you as a frilly that'd take it literal
Now gettin' to your doctorless physical
You'd use me junk as you use ya sword
Before every battle as ya gettin' bored
Seein' as that's it's only use
The glimmerin' brown of ya butt juice

>>5825026

facepalm.jpg

Damn it... I meant to delete those last two lines...

>>5825026

Khorne's a poser, I'm a true chaos OG
I spit verse so glorious, the emperor pardons my heresy,
Put legions against me, I'll leave nothing but debris,
I'm a rhyme factory, and I'll destroy all things tyrannical,
split the chaos gods atomically, my flow's quantum mechanical,
tearing holes in the warp, stop for a minute to take a sabbatical,
I do what I want, rollin' twenties critical,
You best hope for a miracle, because there's only one conclusion,
I smacked Khorne so hard he needs constant blood transfusion,
took the shears to Tzeench and clipped off his protrusions,
In the confusion, I cured Nurgle of what he ails,
As for Slaanesh, I fucked the bitch
and I let her live to tell the tale.

someone needs to record themselves singing these auto-tuned, t-pain style.

crawling back to my tomb, down goes the moon, and up goes the sun, it was a decent run.
the rest of you better keep it up, not skive. when i wake up i want to see this in the suptg archive.

>>5825539

Aw man, next time you gotta stick around Deeplich

>>5825557
where my grave lies, its 6:20am, man i still dont know where any of the other freestylers is
still feel guilty i aint around to teach the newbies the biz
see you around.

>>5825040

If I told you once, I've told you forty-thousand times,
you rhymes ain't just weak, they're felonious crimes,
you're miming poses, spitting licks with errors rife,
fuck, if I was a judge you'd be doing fifteen-to-life,
But you ain't a rapper, pizza, you just plain food,
and I ain't a judge, I'm a warrior in a bad mood,
determined to prove the extent to which I'm rude,
cuz, you're unable to conclude just how badly you've been screwed,
You've got tenacity, but you lack the skills and attitude,
So keep frontin' any way you can, you're just washed up crude,
Your rhyme's nothin' but an attempt to self-delude.

ITT some really, really pale motherfuckers.

>ITT some really, really awesome pale motherfuckers.

fixed.

>>5825770
>durka durka mohammed jihad
Fixed

>>5825774

mmm yes it would seem so.

what's it take to get dj phylactery out of hiding :(

>>5826009
Bitches and coke?

>>5826025

OF COURSE!

Youz humies thought I wuz dead
but youz aimed for me chest, not for me head
my saves iz all sixzes, me gunz always lit up
the boyz are on da warpath, you humies cannt even get it up

now I gotz talkin bones tryin to tell da boyz der place
what he dont know iz we gonna put a zzap gun to his face
fill 'im full o juice like when I banged his mum
make his force shatter, 'is eldrick runes splatter, serve him ork kum on a big looted platta'
whether you be ork, bones, old or foggy
da boyz can't we stopped, we hit u 'til youz groggy

A right propa battle, me daddy would be proud
of you little humies rhymes that drew a nice crowd
We iz come back soon, we aint full o dookies
We don run from da humies or der weak skele spookies
So bring ur rhymes to da table, hope youz stay festive
Cuz da boyz will be back, we gonna seize da initiative

Waaaaghmillionaire an da boyz, we out

Man I came to this thread hopin' to put some sweet rhymes in my head
But all I get is warrior wannabe, mushroom tantrums and some fool too long dead
It's too bad so many of you've gone to bed
'Cause my rhymes're just the thing y'all need your souls to be fed
Just ignore these 40K small fries, and the pies with too many condiments
The Old gods and the punks whose mommas wonder where the condom went
And hey I'm just curious, no worry bros, I don't mean to stray from the point
But on the side what's with all the memes being used all up in this joint?
That unoriginal crap won't stand with this prince of adroit
Soon there'll be a new King to anoint
But seriously man, son I am disappoint.

...... Bump for moar? I'm ashamed to admit I'm actually somewhat liking these.

FUCK YEA!

man, i arise and much to my surprise i find these battles still in need of members, and i dont mean the type that determine genders.

>>5827262
don't be.

It may be hard to believe son.
But here is a commoner whose level is one
When it comes to checks, i cannot perform
I've been useless since the day i was born
I may be confetti to every machete
and if you met me you'd sooner forget me
My only claim to fame that i can confess
is this one time i gave you a quest
and in a half a tick
Which you chose to ignore
and left me bloody and soar
Dead Family and All
Chaotic evil DICK
I find it hard to believe i can live for a day
With adventurers and monster heading my way
Dammit Sigh....
Demi-Liches and plagues
Devil bitches and mages
Why won't I Die?
I had to roll a 20 to even think of this rhyme
another two 20's to finish on time
and even then i think i have failed
and all this seems to entail
in 30 years i have not done a thing
That it seems was worth leveling

>>5825697
I adore you

What the hell, did D-Sun miss the party or sumthin?
What's that? Hello?
Everybody's gone to bed?
Too fuckin' bad, I'll rhyme to wake the dead
But don't you worry, I'm the mul with all the flair
18/99 strength like bitches don't care
'cuz it's THAC0 up in this bitch, like 1992
where we all godless and brainiacs too
all my weapons they all of bone, my muscles sinewy and tan, my bitches all brown-tone
we under the fucked-up sun of dark sun
all the magic stood up and said "fuck this, we're done"
So all my crew, they got psionic powers
We'll make you dream shit and piss yourself for hours
If you wanna resist, If you really won't give
We all warriors up in here
Roll for initiative

>>5821800
Sword n Board is fucking nuts.

This thread is not dying on my watch.

no pg 7 for you, needs moar /tg/ rap.

why do awesome threads only happen when I'm not around >:(

>>5831605
because we all hate you, and now you are back no more rap can ensue.

>>5831605
Thanks asshole, shows over.

My name's Ass&Rack (Acerak). Of all the demiliches I got the most bitches. When I walk past a woman she starts to get itches. If you know what I mean. I'm lean, just a skull with a gleam. A killing machine, spellflinging machine. I crit more than Kukri's cos you know that I'm keen.

>>5826299

Even if the ork boyz spent years conspiring,
Your persistence is vain, ain't nothin' but tiring,
You ran out of ammo long before you stopped firing,
all the honeys can't help admiring my muscles humongous.
Only action you gettin' is from dudes with a fetish for fungus.
Your fuck is congruous, when yo' crew's filled with boys,
The sound of yo' waaaagh ain't nothin' but yo' mating noise,
it annoys me so, to see you so strained,
leave the rappin' to the pros, son, you only asspained.

>>5831709
Sell records dude.

Medieval Rap.

Fantasy Hip hop?

Hip hobbit, nigga

>>5831709

We iz back from da lootin, new toyz in our pack
An wutz dis? da little fairy humie iz back!
Spittin' sum sillie sluge about orkz an dickz
Da only action youz get iz from teeny tau prickz
We iz more dakka dan most, our mindz make da bullets
Youz stole all your ammoz from humies wif mullets
So bring da orkz ur best, wes innit for da long haul
Spit it out, unless youz only got one ball

Sup y'all, I'm Kresh the Bloodbraided
See me hit the table gonna make you jaded
When I look at ya you gonna get raided
Unless ya block me with little ill-fated

Uh, check it

Stomped the beats on some chick with wizards
Saw me and they shit in their gizzards
Tried to kill me with a bunch of lizards
But I said "No" and beat them like I do slivers

Met another guy that thought I did suck
Tried to drag me down with him into the muck
Dude tried even turning me into a duck
But I got trample and he just said "Fuck".

>>5831925

Kresh as duck....

>>5831709
So the man with too many muscles finally returned?
Gotta hand it to ya man, some of your rap is absurd
Seriously, good job, cause it's my respect that you earned
But don't mistake, it's no fake, I'm the Cloak and Dagger contender
Before too long even your sword, board and brawn will surrender
I got the dagger and the swagger and insane bonus to dexterity
In the night, there's no fight I'll just cut down with celerity
Don't be bold nor brave, nothing can save, even your Wise Guy temerity
What I'm trying to say before I get too off track
Is you better get ready to watch yourself Jack
Best grab a buddy to be watchin' your back
Don't defend against soldier, sword, missile, or flak
Prepare yourself son, 'cause I'm on the attack

Bump, because I can't freestyle for shit.

>>5831709
Sword & Board old holmes, it seems yo' forgotten
There's more to rap battlin' than just sucking rotten.
I remember you used to be fine, killing time
By capping Balrog asses in Moria Mine.
Now you're weak, tossing rhymes out at faggots
Bitches so stinking they're practically maggots.
Pick yo' fights better, you used to be focused.
Dropping yo' foes like a summon swarm o'locusts.
I thought y'all were blessed, but it seems fool yo' cursed.
I come back to help yo', cos yo' needs ta be NURSED.

>>5832049
If you call ten minutes of composition and another ten of editing Freestylin' then you have a bigger opinion of some of us than I do, at least in the context of "freestyling"

>>5831953

Humies be sneaky, humies be quiet
But da ork knowz best, iz time for a riot
We iz make enuf noise to awake da land
So da guards make a choppa meet yo prostate gland
Youz crit fumbled your sneak, youz shoelaces untied
Even da short gretchin guards can tell youz lied
Da only skillset to be used from da compendium
Iz da ones that mean war in da 41st millenium
So go trainz yur dagger, an buy 2 adventurin kits
Cuz you needa level yo swagger, before we turn u ta bits

>>5832086

Dis humie speaks da truf

Bumpan.

Alas, when the thread just gets good I have to depart
It seems I must wait some time before putting cold steel in your hearts
Just wait, in time my friends you'll peer up at me from the floor
But damn.... even Rogues have to make a run to the store

man whys everyone calling out on conan? you all know hes too strong, he'll crush your bones to sand, AND so its easier for you to understand, light the fire on your funeral pire, people will see from all across the land, how badly he burned you simple brigands.
fight amongst each other, make a rival, battle for survival, build up the tension til the rhymes come tidal.
you hear me!?
>>5832086
i type it as they come, but i have thinking time between each line, this way i find more fun.

>>5832392

Deeplich takes da field, da humies beware
but to an ork youz cant even begin to scare
youz spells an wands twinkle wif weak flair
while da deffcoptas load up an take to da air
der payloadz r fierce an to u dey stare
waitin for me word to pound u most unfair
Dey iz da pride off me warband, u best beware
unless itz tuesday, when dey iz needz to repair
but saturday ta monday iz all da time we need
to put a corpse in 'is place, show 'em evin he can bleed

bump

THIS THREAD CANNOT DIE

again and again, this ork again?, learn to restrain and refrain coz your rhymes aint no frieght train like mine, which are insane, but you i dont blame, its the old ones who forgot to give you working brains.
you say you aint scared, quite loudly you declared that greenskins are fearless and beyond compare, now i dont mean to stare, but is that a simple piece of iron you have there? you intend to take an undead, a being tranceding life, a "corpse boy" as you said, with that blunt and shapeless knife?
hilarious! im in hysterics! allmost as bad as that party of only clerics! these problems your mek cant fix, ones your idiocy, and the other is me. bring all you want! the more the merrier, going to need a landfill when i kill you all and bury ya. and the more i kill the stronger i get, im a renegade undead existance remover, and i aint done yet. orks are stuck, being as they were made, betting on dice and luck, they cannot stand againt my tirade, EXP motherfucker, mine goes in perform, but to the codex orks conform, they see my wit has bypassed the ceiling and has no limit.
man your rhymes taste like brine, this shits barely worth my time, everyone else sticks to their pattern, and my raps fit in about as badly as Dr Manhattan.

>>5831852

As long as she's hot, I ain't opposed to the xenos,
Sword n' Board goes out to stud like a thoroughbred palomino,
Always room for more bitches when high rollin at the casino,
threw seventy seven sevens, flowin' like lava outta a volcano,
my rhyme permeates, penetrates ya' like a neutrino...

>>5832077

...and now some bitch be grindin' the house like he's Tarantino.
Wherever I step, I draw competition,
thugs trying to make a name, they full of ambition,
but it ain't my volition, with whom I do battle,
I fight who steps up, till they croak a death rattle,
That'll be enough from you, my rhymes ain't even spent,
No matter the challenge, I'll always represent.
But your intent is skewed, you trying to be a martyr?
I'm going deeper, pushin' limits, and always rappin' harder,
I don't assemble lyrics idly, I always flow smarter,
Never barter, never settle, that's how you stay legit,
I got better things to do than hang around and babysit.

Epic level caster up in this bitch...
Athtais, your favorite knowledge-hungry lich.
A newcomer I am, but you see I've been memorizing
Some magical rhymes that I find quite mesmerizing.
But first I'd like to express my respect
Sword n' Board, I must say, you've got them all decked.
I wouldn't be surprised if Waaaaghmillionaire was secretly erect.
Now, ork, you've got me on the edge of my seat
But I do believe that this fighter here has got you beat.
Now, if you find my lines to be lacking,
I don't blame you, for my ancient mind they're racking
But in my lair, buried in books, I've been cracking
So to pass the time, it's you I'm attacking.
It's nothing personal, you'll understand,
Just trying to create my own brand
of musical word here in the land.

I'm not retreating, but I've been in and out of the thread all day. Gonna head out for now, but I'll be back later tonight.

Till then, keep it righteous, /tg/ rappers.

>>5833378

thanks for the props, nice rhymes yourself.

DeepLich and Waaaagh seem to be having it out, looking forward to seeing this develop.

>They say geniuses pick green, but you ain't got the mentality,
>I'm always down for slayin' some green anatomy,
>You about to be a casualty, cuz' with every yell,
>you're showin' a deep-seeded hatred for Mr. Spell,

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck D:

>>5833378
>>5833322

Two hollow retarrdz 'ave taken da stage
Sayin Waaaaghmillionaire only reads from one page
Of da rulez of war from a future quite bleak
So let me tellz u da story of Dirtnap Peak
Me start wif meself, da biggest an da bad
Decked out in shinies, even armor class for me hands
Me choppa an me shield were me weapons of choice
Stomped creepy critters like a truck on ur rolls royce
Quikfig up next, da great goblin wizard in tow
He wore tunics of blue cotton, his gloves lent him der flow
He weave da spellz so fierce all da peasants bow down
Dey offer him babies an bread so he wont der homes drown
Hez fireballs ar diplomatic, his time stop pure erratic
He make da commissars fear of warp signs symptomatic
Fleetyfeet da rogue wuz arr skill monkey
He wielded fowty knives in battle, make da ladies all spunky
Is a guard needed persuadin', Fleetyfeet had da word
He weaved talez exotic, spat wordsies toxic, made da ladies erotic, alignment chaotic, didn stop till he preferred
An last but no least iz da great Priest Rruntgoly
Gork an Mork's finest, weaved da blessins most holy
He fixies me boo-boos, he make me all sparkly
Da enemies pray fer hope, all dey get is a Chant o Darkly
Cuz everybody blind to da might of me party
We stormed da base of Commissar Mclarty
Da humies all rallied an raised der swords, dey tried der best an hoped for rewards, but Quikfig wrapped all der necks in cords, an Fleetyfeet tricked 'em into da House of Lords

(in da sky)

Ah slammed me choppa about an covered it in humie guts
All da humies started runnin, Mclarty got in a fuss
He waved 'is sword around, intendin to shred
But Rruntgoly asked Mork ta make Mclarty drop dead
So wen you say us orkies only know how to 40k
You best remember da tale told today
Da orks find da way to get da EXP in loot
We travel in da parties an slay more dan da Kroot

>>5833669

But me rhymes ain't done, lez get back to da fight
Athtais da lich, wieldin bookz an a nightlight
Youz wants ta make a name in da land o rhymes
But ya pick da wrong warboss an committed many crimes
Orkz take all challengerz to da brink of despair
Cause It wont be frilly robes we force u to wear
Fillz you wif rocketz an make u eat a grenade
Jus anotha dead before da great Orky Crusade
Make Abaddon look like a cutesy little girl
Da humie lich rhymes make uz all wanna hurl

All da challengers come, all da rhymes are woven
But da battle don end till Waaaaghmillionaire haz spoken
Da Warboss iz king an dont u fohget, we iz da great orky threat, attack us youz regret, we pound u upset, youz course iz offset, da time iz up an no more rhymes r beget

>>5833669
>>5833824
Greenskin, I am amused by your anecdote.
A fantastical endeavour, I'm sure, but compared to us you're a mote.
I'm sorry, was that too cold for you? Need a coat?
Your intelligence is impressive when to a rat it's relative.
All I read was a ork-bred circlejerk that barely succeeded to irk,
And now it's within your horde's nightmares I'll lurk.
I've got a Rusting Grasp prepared for your axe,
Reduce that hunk of iron to a pile of tacks.
You can't compare, you see,
The door to the secrets of this world, I hold the key.
I am older than your gods and stronger than your Nobz.
It's more than books I wield, I have knowledge in every field,
From the stones of my lair more than one ork I have peeled,
You're not particularly impressive, Warboss or not.
I must say, a few of your rhymes gave me shivers
But I've got a ring of frost resistance, and baby it delivers.
I heard you gitz are looking for a fight,
And this lich is up to the challenge, you feeling alright?
You kill, you conquer, yeah you've got might,
But I've got a 400 damage Fireball and son it's got BITE!

>>5833669
wow, well that wasnt half a story, scratch that it was a trilogy. its time for my analogy.
while im killing orks in scores of tens, he trying to prove to me hes got friends? afterlistening to him all day i figured he thinks hes top militant, but being good at 40k doesnt mean you are my equivalent. trying to figure his game of 6 turns as he squints and he gurns, im min-max laying on the attack, thicker than your arteries after a pancake stack, i keep short and compact, and still keep the orks face looking smacked.
gork and mork aint real son, they are a trick of your mind, and not a very good one, it doesnt have to be for your kind, doesnt take much to make you want to bludgeon anything in sight, i wouldnt call it a "fight", its more a dance of dribbling retards i approach without caution, and watch as you both go till one dies from exhaustion. now since your gods arent real, maybe i can get you to feel a proposal youll need to accept to prevent me going postal on you all. youve got the tenacity to work under me, im more of a god than gork or mork will ever be. ill pile support spells on you so high, an enire SM chapter couldnt make you die, for an eternity youll kill and take, leave nothing in your wake, all i ask is you become my namesake.

>>5833958

Youz sling fireballs around, hollerin dat u astute
But da only ballz u good wif r from a male prostitute
Spendin all ur goldsies on humies in leathers
Fillin ur lair wif homos, gettin friendly wif der netherz
Da only nightmarez u give involve fanficz an Cynder
I feels more worried 'bout fightan a naked kender
Youz tryin to rap but u iz confused about gender
Da bitches belong in back, makin me lunch most tender
Cuz me have no time to stop and cook proper
Wen ders worldz ta conquer, me just eatz a double Whopper
Spellz prepared an waitin for me boyz
Wut you fohget iz dat sometimes we make no noise
We can be sneaky gitz when da time is needed
Da Gretchinz shanks inflict condition: bleedin'
Magick itemz or no, we gotz moar choppaz in tow, da boyz win da fame, youz just cookin in ur own flame, we teach u me name, so u say who won da game, cuz lichy, ur bonez break all da same

>>5834108

Me thinkz Deep Lich iz a tad confused
Cuz he makes an offer he knowz iz better refused
Da orkz neva bend to forces most vile
Didn you see da humies we left inna pile?
Blood an gutz an battle won, all cuz of arr big gun
We knowz no surrender to skinny talky fossils, we hav no interest in bein hinny chalky apostles, of floaty boogeymen in caverns undaground, cuz Gork an Mork already give uz strength most profound
Less pancakes, moar dakka we would recommend
Before da orks come round an ur skele ass we bend
You can shoot us in 10s, wif da bodies block roads, but da boyz nevah sleep an dey keep comin in droves
All da mind gamez in da world wont save you, all da spellbookz an scrollz you review, will burn like da rest of your lair, iz true, so stepz up freaky face, we jus saved against your glare

>>5834132
Alright, I see how you're playin', ork. Time to get to work.
In all my years, I've never seen such bullshit.
No disrespect to those guys who aren't into clit,
But more numerous than humies you've killed are bitches I've had to please,
And believe me, with my enchanted stamina t'was a breeze.
Hard to believe you can still stand without a wheeze,
That burger's got calories in the six hundred and seventies,
And not to mention more life-threatening tendencies
Than your average hive of Africanized honey bees.
Of course, compared to those insects you're just another bug,
Shouting about WAAAAAAGH like it's a drug.
There's more to life than violence, I sigh,
Though when it comes to taking care of you I'm not on low supply.
Ever heard of quality over quantity? I'm the perfect example,
My spellbooks are ample, your gitz my minions will trample,
All before you realize that everything I'll throw at you will just be a sample.

>>5834383

Me needz a break, must do otha things
But when I get back, me is feedin u to da squigs

bump!

>>5834285
gave you a chance to trancend, all the laws of physics yours to bend, but like a sheep you followed the green trend, sad to witness the perfect pair of witless and genius go to waste, guess its time for you to taste your bitter end, and believe me its nothing like pancakes, anyway, moving on with haste.
droves is what i want boy, droves is what i need. cant you see that more orks = more easy exp? all you are doing is feeding me until im practically seething with power untold, wielding archaic magic of old, channeling my 20 WIS until all you orks get told, this must be spectacular for a bystander watching this unfold, like lightning striking a tree dead and hollowed, ill remove your existance in a flash, you better step it up right now coz im feeling no resistance against my style so brash, i wont even leave ash after this.

WHERES ALL THE OTHER PLAYERS?
>>5824081
WHERED SPOONY GO!? GET BACK HERE I ENJOY YOUR SHOWS

>>5833669

bumpan

>>5834686
Don't diss the physics with your bony jaws,
besides which they're more like suggestions than laws.
Add some applied science from after the Fall,
and I won't need a spheroid to be bustin' your balls.

I don't even need feet to kick your ivory ass out,
I've skillsofted enough kung-fu to remove all doubt,
so please take your leave by any which route,
or I'll do to you what the Yanks did to the Krauts.

All morphs on this board knows the Chan's common theme,
is that tentacles beat necro-lolis and that's just my scheme,
so if you think I'm flappin' beak or that I'm in a dream, I'll take out some nanos and turn you into steam.

I can tragic your magic with scientific finesse, your spells and incantations don't give me distress, your idea of a good time is wearin' a dress, you've been Turned by other guys without even a Bless.

My genes have all been fixed against your disease, I'm far more than these monkeys that came down from the trees, I'm a transhumanic mystic and I can't even sneeze, but if you want to test science against magic...? Please.

>>5835203
allow me to reach for my bone-rim spectacles, is this freestyler covered in damn... tentacles? did i just get called out by a.... squid?
i did. round 4 has made me laugh more than any before, i didnt see that coming when i stepped onto the floor.
as an animal you cant have a good grip on english, so ill make this easier to distinguish, i know this because im english. americans always get it wrong, be it in voice acting or in song, route=root, say "i promise to learn to speak better than the kroot" allright so that wasnt a very good serve, but when i hear americans say rowt it just grinds my last nerve.
i cant get serious with you eyeing me like that, little beady eyes and your twitching ink sack, better hurry up and and spray that screen then depart, everyone can see we are lightyears apart, im sure if no one sees you leave, you can save heart.
i can barely see you in the foodchain im so much higher, we had topped you ages ago when we learned to make fire, and then i took was i was, and i made it better, i made myself invincible and made killing my principle cause. ive fought wars, slain more than 20 INT can recall, an engine that never stops or stalls and you are a squid.
a damn squid.
i cant get over your choice of moniker, but if its science youve allied with, you wont last much longer.
looking forward to battling you properly later, but right now im tired, you can see how my ryhmes suffer. im losing my clout, which means i gotta back out.
until then, squishy, ill have to put off my squid dish.

what up, I'm back now.

>>5835203

They call it magic for a reason, I ain't gotta explain shit,
science in a fantasy game don't make sense one bit,
allow me to transmit, yo, this ain't reality,
I'm a man of science myself, but you just committed a fallacy,
It's a matter entirely out of my jurisdiction,
when you try to mix fantasy with science fiction,
It's a contradiction, shit makes me want to explode,
Like takin' orders from dyin' psychic on a golden kamode,
But if you spittin' odes to orks or flying space fettucini,
You know Arthur C. Clarke would get his ass beat by Harry Houdini.
There ain't no hidden meaning, but this point I must advocate:
magic bends the rules on which science operates.

>But if you spittin' odes to orks or flying space fettucini, You know Arthur C. Clarke would get his ass beat by Harry Houdini

>But if you spittin' odes to orks or flying space fettucini, You know Arthur C. Clarke would get his ass beat by Harry Houdini
Glorious.

>But if you spittin' odes to orks or flying space fettucini, You know Arthur C. Clarke would get his ass beat by Harry Houdini

>>5835819
Lovecraft got Harry Houdini raped by a mummie.

>>5835203
Haha, what's this? Did someone lose their familiar?
I've got a dying squid on aisle four, I think I've got just the cure.
You claim to be backed up by science, but bitch you don't even have vertebrae,
I've summoned oozes with more structural stability than you, I've gotta say.
Science. Don't get me started. Yes, it's mighty interesting,
But pointless when you've got a magical ring,
That can do just about anything,
So I'll have to go with the arcane in terms of versatility.
Now, yes, science has got some points in utility,
But face it: anything science does, magic can do better, bitch.
And you can ask my brother, he's a gravity lich.
So while you're crunching numbers desperately,
Determining something useless like a star's density,
We magical bros are knee deep in babes, fame, and gold,
So I would consider you told.

>But if you spittin' odes to orks or flying space fettucini, You know Arthur C. Clarke would get his ass beat by Harry Houdini

I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

>But if you spittin' odes to orks or flying space fettucini, You know Arthur C. Clarke would get his ass beat by Harry Houdini

OH SNAP

MUST NOT LET THIS THREAD DIE

>>5835638

nice rhymes, sweet burns,

>>5835670

knockout fucking punch

>>5835850

good followthrough
I think the squid is out of the game.

bumpan for moar rappan

>>5836066
i damn well hope he is not.
well, time for me to pack up shop, im knackered. the amphibian better bounce back or ill be dissapointed inn'im.
i think that last line was so bad.... ill take it as a sign, im going to bed.
(but really seriously, this threads been going two nights, thats glorious. keep it up ill read the archive in the morning. )

BUMP BUMP BUMP

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/5821800/

fuckin archiiiiived

bumpan

you guys who are bumping, instead of just saying bump.
why dont you try your hand at it yourself?

It would appear in my absence the competition's got fierce
Not surprised if Green Guy and Bone Bag're in tears
Now I see some new faces, lived for a hundred million years
Get ready to learn yourself something, better watch your peers
Too bad I was gone seems like y'all been throwin' down
Hell some of these rhymes make me wish they had sound
But at least I'm back, the Black in the Shadow, man I'm ready for the fight
Perhaps together we can remedy this lack of rap plight
Sword n' Board started the thread and laid down is dope beats
And yo that means til we're autosagin' that we can't retreat
If we all stop now on the whole then the sages and trolls give us defeat
So give us that sweet flow, these rhyme's gotta grow
Long as the sun rises and the north winds blow
But y'all don't mistake these words for peace, I aint meanin' a truce
Come at me unprepared I'll string you up like a goose
Just step at me once too wrong you'll get caught in my noose
When you barely hear that sound in the dark it's normal for you not to breathe
Because you recognized the sound.. of a knife leaving it's sheathe

Even as a lich with eternity laid out before me,
Without lyrically blessed challengers, I am a bit angry.
Has Mommy forced you to bed? Got a curfew to fulfill?
The night has barely begun, and I've got plenty of time to kill.
You're browsin' /tg/ on a Saturday night, and it's not even for fappan.
You've got nothing better to do, so why don't you try your hand at rappan?

CAN'T IT MAH TOUCH AC
YOU FUCKING SONNUVABEE

>>5837052
It seems I spoke too soon, a familiar face returns to the fight.
I mean no ill, but a lich with no one to rap battle? It's not right.
First I'd like to take a moment to point out a flaw in your battle plan,
When it comes to Detect spells, I'm your man,
Do you really think you can sneak up on something so transcendent?
Now wait, no offense to your skills meant,
But I don't think a mortal in a cloak, you see,
Can leave more than a scratch on me,
Athtais, an overall badass undead entity.
Now, you must have ranks in Perform (Rap),
However I think you're lacking in Diplomacy, sap.
It's not very wise to threaten a spellcaster,
Especially when it is of death he is the master.
Now, I'll accept an apology, if you're willing to offer,
Because together we could take down Waaaaaghmillionaire's choppa.

(I admit that last rhyme is not so great.)

Power Word: BUMP

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH

WE IZ BACK, AN WE IZ ROLLIN 40,000 ORKZ DEEP

De magic skeletan showed us orkz a few tricks
Now wez gettin called out by a big ugly fish
Makin secret battle pactz wif humies wearin black
But we knowz bettah than ta trust a pinkie whoz really a rat
Da choppa cut down all da foes in arr path
We turn da softies an da spineless into one big bloodbath
So bring all ur skeles, ur squidies, ur goofy humies too
Waaaaghmillionaire got da mic, da rest iz just food

I iz maxed out Swing Choppa, Iz got a plus five mic
Me armor ez enchanted wif fire, how can u dislike?
Mah sheet is maxed out wif me special abilities
Da only thing these commerz got are weak hostilities
Cuz now mah mek boy got me decked in a war frame
When me melta burn ur wifey, youz iz only ta blame
Cuz you pissed off da warboss, da baddest one in charge, picked da wrong one ta cross cuz me warband is just tew large, all da humies will say 'sauce?' when dey find you in pieces, free of charge

So git a bitch wif a pencil, and keep tracka da beats
I iz got enough orkiness for two charakter sheets

bump because of ahwhatshisface spam on first page.

>>5837272
A lich, I admit, a formidable foe
One I think I'd be wary to face off alone
But your dark and arcane intentions I would probably find
A different mirror of the more mundane versions of mine
I agree, there should be some small amount of kinship to us
While we wait and hope Sword and Board hasn't gone all to rust
I had hoped to play with Mr Green, I felt a fight on the cusp
But alas, it appears he's made a hasty retreat and evaded my thrust
So I agree, my new friend Lich to our little temporary understanding
So far the single rhymers have been less than demanding
Hardly taking a beat to throw down, not even a fling
They aint got no flow, no real prose, held together with gimmicks
These punks' rhymes makin' me sick, barely worthy of limmericks

>>5837822

Youz right, me did indeed evade your rusty blade
But dats not because Waaaaghmillionaire iz afraid
Youz has flowy robes like a priest straight outta Greyhawk
Dey make more noize dan a bitch ridin an ork cock
Youz aint no Batman, you cant even talk ta fishies
At least da Aquaman didnt fill hiz room wif bishies
Put ur shurikan away, dey just don matter
You iz facin da Orkz, you iz guaranteed ta splatter
Wen da broadside me choppa knockz your face into shapez
Like wen da Eldar psykahs watches der weird videotapez
So sharpen your daggerz and assume da position
It makez it easier to be emo an get right da incision
Cuz all da black in da world cant block out da sun
Dat is Waaaaghmillionaire, cuz I is havin too much fun

>>5837687
What's that, another WAAAAAAAAAAAGH! is brewin'?
Looks like Waaaaaghmillionaire is back, my surrender he's pursuin',
Yeah, well you're wack, you know that? You ain't got jack,
High on the fact that your orky brethren lack the capacity to realise you're not so strong after all,
I mean, what are all those boyz gonna do when I make Rocks Fall,
And everyone dies? Yeah, you're minmaxin', but I'm naturally better than you,
You're just walking fungi in a bloodthirsty war crew.
By the way, good luck finding my phylactery,
Because if that remains when you're through then you'll never be rid of me.
Alright, you're tough, I got that. But I'm immortal.
I've been killing brutes like you since time immemorial.
Step up to the plate, if you wanna face a lich irate,
Because I'm up for a lyrical debate, and I think it's our fate, so don't make me wait... ya hear me?

a two day long thread. Impressive.

>>5837687

Oh snap, a new track, Mean Green is back
No surprise he's back on the mic and he's already on the attack
But you shouldn't be so aggressive, take a step back 'fore you get a knife in your face
There'll be big green spores on floors like moldy snow in this place
I got some bad news sport, your hiatus was too short
Aint got my weapon enchanted, I'm sad to report
See, I went to the Wizard and asked for a spell
He told me no problem, because he thought he knew all of them well
I told this guy my order and hell his jaw just fell
He smacked me upside the head and just called me buffoon
When I asked for an Enchant Weapon: Bane (Mushroom)

>>5837998

You iz spittin somefink about me bein weak
But I cannat hear u over da sound of da feet
Ov 40,000 Lootas comin to rip u apart
Dey needs new trinkets an dey love a good part
Of a mean lichey fiend who dinks hes da best
Dinkin hiding a phylactery puts 'im above da rest
But it dont matter if da world is da orkz
We sell wut we don eat and we eat a big course
meal dat iz, cuz when you iz sneaky wif da boyz
U gotta feed some spoilz or dey forget ta bring da noise
So wake up Mistah Lich, smell the mornin sun
I'm wearin me mech frame and iz rokkin a big gun
I iz got a secret tactic dat ur gonna love
As long u dont mind bein buried in mud
Ur time iz run out, ur bonez r gonna feed us
Cuz Creed owes me big time, an you iz no genius

>>5838129
Forty thousand? I hope you're not sportin' depleted deuterium,
That shit ain't got nothing on my mighty imperium
Of magic, of course, I'm not praising the Emprah,
He just doesn't compare to my eighteen inch hydra,
If you know what I mean. But I digress, warboss,
I think you'll find your Lootas at a loss,
It's hard to stand up against a wizard that's so cross.
Quality over quantity, again I must recite,
Forty thousand orkz against me can't stand and fight.
Your number's impressive, sure, but this ain't a war of attrition,
Ork, you can destroy me, but you're on an impossible mission.
Like an Immovable Rod, I can't be stopped... say hello to regeneration!

bumpan

>>5837052

Rogues don't vex me, I'll duel with satisfaction,
You stirred up a ruckus, now you're the main attraction.
Your distraction don't affect me, my feet ain't flat on the ground,
I do more in a free action than you accomplish in a full round.
Your verse may be dope, but it ain't exactly profound,
and though you be dodgy, an opening will be found,
my style will confound you, and I'll exploit your slowness,
you'll be feelin' every digit of my base attack bonus.
even Cronus couldn't stand up to my lyrical abuse,
the bitch doubled over and puked out Zeus,
and I'm onto yo' game, fake flattery won't earn you a truce,
findin' an excuse to start shit with emcees,
but each lyric you spittin' is plagued with disease,
You trying to apply leverage, but you producin' no torque,
Who's gonna take you seriously when you gettin' stomped by the Ork?

>>5838288

>Like an Immovable Rod, I can't be stopped

Some tell dis dead monkeigh dey dont work quite like dat
An Immovable Rod dont roll out, dey dont even respond to a smack
Frohm da mighty mek claw on me power frame armor
I send me boyz home and cut u down like a logger
Da only sound u will hear iz da chop chop chop
Of a ghoulie spellcastah who cant stop spittin slop
I don need 40,000 boyz to take u home to Vecna
I jus need me pimp hand, das enuf to wreck ya
Da boyz dont follow any loud mangy ork
Only Waaaaghmillionaire got da knife an fork
Ta chow down on da galaxy, an da ones in da way
So go tell ur DM dat u'd ratha crochet
Cuz me dice are weighted, only 20s appear, Im da boss most hated by all da weakies an weirdz

>>5838445
Seems this caster was misinformed, I apologize
My knowledge on odd magical items seems ill-advised
But my stance on your crap hasn't been revised.
All you can brag about is the size of your boyz,
And the power of your axes - they're still toys,
Next to my might, it's quite a humorous sight,
Like comparing the sun's might to a flash light,
Let's get this straight. I'm not afraid of you,
In fact, I've got half a mind to show to your crew,
The biggest and baddest of all. You ask, who?
Me, of course, impersonating a mushroom can't be that hard,
Especially when it's you, a special breed of retard.
Hey, your rhymes are legit, but I won't quit,
It'll always come out JUST AS PLANNED for me, you green git.

One last bump before I head to rest.
Had a good run tonight, my brethren. Keep it real.

>>5838724

nice rhymes, hope to see you in the next thread.

>>5838617

Runnin outta style, uz rhymes r gettin old
But da orks cant quit, it comes wif bein made of mold
We iz looted everry gun in da Milky Way
Da Grinch wishes he was a part ov arr holiday
Iz time ta send u packin cuz u spent ur action points on faction
Da boyz arr lined up and ur story ends like Micheal Jackson
Complexion pale and little boyz in ur pants
So put on ur gown and get ready ta dance
Da gunz bring da dakka an da trucks bring da smog
We promise ta bury ur remains in Prague
So frilly girly men can can stand and remark
"Athais the Lich, more like Athais the Lark!"
Write ur final will, testament an wishes
Jus tell ur kidz ur goin hookin fo fishes
Even I wouldnt tell poor little Jimmy da truf
Dat u got knocked outta da park like a pitch ta Babe Ruf
Ur battle is ovah, youz casted all ur spellz
Da Vancian system has left u gasping in da hellz
Cuz when a lichey lich dies we all know were 'e goes
He gitz ta meet Dispater an become onna his hoes
Go back ta ya coffin, keep ur nightlight on
Waaaaghmillionaire bring da pain, his fightan wins 'im fame, and boney, youz just makin me yawn

Da bars are closin an itz da last call
But wez got one last set o rhymes makin planetfall
Majah props ta Sword n Board for startin dis battle
And DJ DeepLich did make me orky bones rattle
All da otha humies and squids were alright
But da warboss beat dem all in every fight
But dont dink dis waaaaaagh is losin any steam
Next thread drops in, da choppas will be keen
An da deffcoptas arr gonna take to da sky
Da mekz arr gonna march an da hogs arr gonna ride
Cuz da Waaaaghmillionaire dont stop 'till itz ovah
Putz da humies in da oven and garnish wit sum clover
Da boyz in da hood got all da MCs in der sightz
So get out yer blanketz and dont go to sleep any nights
We iz answer da call, from any humie or food group
Da rhymes keep gettin spit till da wankahs eyes droop

So keep it real little humies, it was really quite fun
But itz fair ta say, Waaaaghmillionaire clearly won

>But itz fair ta say, Waaaaghmillionaire clearly won

...yeah okay

Alright /tg/, the time has come.
Voice your opinions: Which MC won?

A word of closing for the eloquen/t g/ents,
Y'all heard the call, and came to represent.
The battle was furious, y'all gave two hundred percent,
Ain't no dissent, all emcees rapped with honor,
Lesser men would've turned tail, hidden, or cowered,
Y'all rolled with the punches, feelin' proud and empowered.
But I ain't spendin' hours on congratulations,
I'm ending round four in five's anticipation,
soon it'll be time again to man the battle stations,
so use the time wisely and improve yo' articulation.

My god these threads are amazing.

>>5839227
As my last piece for the night, I gotta let you know
That I hope all of you will make your own opinion on this bro
But if it's mine you seek then I'll tell you what I've seen
I favored SnB on the top then our buddy Waaaaaaghmillionaire, aka Mr. Green
After them I like DJ Deeplich, though I found his style kind of wanting
Then there's that guy Athtais, his beat was off that's the only thing
Other than that his intellectual rhyming construction was king
Everyone else that tried, I just gotta give you props
Wait for the next battle, and with your first post don't stop
Now where do I fit on the list? That's for you to decide
Unusual for a Rogue, from your critique I can't hide
Wherever you put me, I had fun, hell, it's fine
With that, I'm out /tg/, see you next time.

>>5839817

Hell yeah, you did great. I also think MC Deeplich should get more praise, he's got the closest thing to freestyle.
S&B had epic lyrics and lots of OH DAMN moments. Waaagh rapped in character, and pulled off some difficult shit.
Athtais had some clever turns of phrase, but didn't have the fire the other guys did.

Fuck it, give yourselves a round of applause, goddamn this thread was epic.

page 9? 183 replies? ive rapped i this thread two nights and its still alive, but you guys say its over.... guess ill let it die.
just saying these threads are like yours truly, you cant exorcise it like any ordinary ghouly, we'll be back in a few weeks, you can bet on that, surely.