Posting mode: Reply
Password(Password used for file deletion)
  • Supported file types are: GIF, JPG, PNG
  • Maximum file size allowed is 3072 KB.
  • Images greater than 250x250 pixels will be thumbnailed.
  • Read the rules and FAQ before posting.
  • ????????? - ??

  • File : 1261699369.jpg-(7 KB, 180x367, Lofn.jpg)
    7 KB Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:02 No.7274820  
    Eldrad regarded the abomination spawn from the womb of his xenophiliac daughter.

    "It has come to my attention that you may be a male child. Maybe."

    "Well actually-"

    "So, an opportunity presents itself to take the one thing denied of the Eldar race. The one thing that the mon'keigh enjoy that we do not."

    "Um... souls that don't belong to a extradimensional daemon god spawned by our ancestor's sheer decadence?"

    "No! Plot armor!"

    "Grandpa Eldar, I don't know if you seen the IG's casualty rate as of... ever but-"

    "No, not those paper mache covered fools! Space Marines!"

    "Oh yeah..."

    "Since you are, for the purposes of my plot, male and have mon keigh, you are eligible to become a Space Marine!"

    "This plan doesn't seem very well thought out."

    Eldrad ignored her, "But which Chapter?"

    Which chapter indeed /tg/? You choose.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!TZikiEEr0tg 12/24/09(Thu)19:03 No.7274830
    Lazy marines.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:07 No.7274874

    >> Slasher !XGB1sBZTyY 12/24/09(Thu)19:10 No.7274912
    Death Guard.
    >> -|- Reichsguard -|- !!bOOhb8C7gxV 12/24/09(Thu)19:10 No.7274913
    For the thickest amount of plot Ultramarines, obviously.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:11 No.7274926
    Space Sharks
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:12 No.7274929

    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:12 No.7274930
    Blood Ravens, to show off as a psyker
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:12 No.7274935

    Tough decision. Space Wolves maybe? Or how about the Salamanders?
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:12 No.7274936
    Legion of the Damned.

    As if this half-xenos, half-mon'keigh abomination of daaaaw was anything but.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:13 No.7274951
    Goddamned Black Templars.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:14 No.7274952
    Black Templars.

    Make her join the legion of Angry Marines in black. Make her become a fanatic, anger-spewing psyker of rage. The heresy would be delightful once they figure out a witch (with a vagina, no less) is in their midst.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:15 No.7274963
         File1261700121.jpg-(409 KB, 1070x1258, tgheresyiscanon.jpg)
    409 KB

    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:15 No.7274964
    "We need someone who won't bother with a background check," Eldrad pondered.

    "They'd have to be having a pretty lazy day to forget that shit," LIIVI explained from being stuck to the cieling.


    "Hi, I'd like to join the Lazy Marines," Lofn explained.

    "Well... alright..." The Chapter Master appathetically picked his nose, "Well, you need to pass our test."


    "Three rigorous questions."


    "What is your name?"

    Lofn must give a fake name. What shall it be?
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:16 No.7274970

    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:16 No.7274972
    Lofn as a squire.
    Following his master and trainer to battle, learning as he goes.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:16 No.7274973
    /tg/ likes Space Wolf wolf wolf wolf wolf wolfs too wolf. I want sum BLACK TEMPLAR TEMPLAR TEMPLAR TEMPLAR PURGE TEMPLAR TEMPLAR.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:16 No.7274977
    What? this is Eldrad, He will send the abomination to work as a Tau diplomatic intern.

    The job is to stand and welcome the foreigners while they charge. How is that for plot armour tests?
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:16 No.7274979
    Black Templars have no psykers.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:16 No.7274983

    It's a name.

    And it's mysterious.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:16 No.7274984
    Marneus McHumanstein
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:17 No.7274987
    meet > The heresy would be delightful once they figure out a witch (with a vagina, no less) is in their midst.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:17 No.7274988
    Not Xenos
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:17 No.7274995
         File1261700272.jpg-(23 KB, 386x279, emps.jpg)
    23 KB
    I am enjoying this thread. Go on...
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:18 No.7274998
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:18 No.7275001

    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:18 No.7275002
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:18 No.7275010
    "Uhm...Black. Black Templar."

    "I'm a human, and I have a thingy."
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:19 No.7275013

    yiff in hell
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:19 No.7275016
    >> Slasher !XGB1sBZTyY 12/24/09(Thu)19:19 No.7275017

    I can't be arsed telling you.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:19 No.7275019
    youre a little late to this party bro
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:20 No.7275028
    What is your name?
    What is your quest?
    What... is your favourite colour?
    >> /d/eviating Ca/tg/irl 12/24/09(Thu)19:20 No.7275029
    I woulda said Reasonable Marines. That would have gone well.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:20 No.7275031
    "What is your quest?"

    Sorry, couldn't resist. Do go on though, OP
    >> Slasher !XGB1sBZTyY 12/24/09(Thu)19:21 No.7275038

    What are you credit card details?
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:21 No.7275041
         File1261700479.jpg-(208 KB, 600x500, touhousadflan.jpg)
    208 KB
    Flan does not approve.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:21 No.7275044
    Lofn? Male?

    Well, that's my christmas ruined.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:22 No.7275050



    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:23 No.7275056
    lern 2 read
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:23 No.7275061
    Black Templars.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:24 No.7275064

    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:25 No.7275080
    "Ryan McHumanstein."

    "Sounds good to me."

    One of the 1st Company nudged the Chapter Master, "Boss, I dunno. This one looks kinda like a girl to me. And like an Eldar."

    "Have you ever heard of a dude named Ryan? Or an Eldar named McHumanstein? Honestly. Alright, next question."


    "What is you quest?"
    >> MagicJuggler 12/24/09(Thu)19:26 No.7275088
         File1261700760.jpg-(12 KB, 250x188, hughmann.jpg)
    12 KB
    Name her Hugh Mann. Nothing suspicious about such a name...
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:26 No.7275096

    god i love how lazy they are in everything
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:26 No.7275097
    Emprah's Children, of course.

    Or a loyalist Luna Wolf.

    Yes I know there's reasons why those are both awesomely horrible ideas, but they also are horribly AWESOME.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:26 No.7275099
         File1261700811.jpg-(80 KB, 1279x1023, Boreale screaming like a moron.jpg)
    80 KB
    We seek the EMPRAH
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:27 No.7275103
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:28 No.7275110
    Why in the Throne isn't her name Black Templar the White?
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:28 No.7275116
    black templar? templar templar templar?

    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:30 No.7275135
    To all the idiots who keep suggesting chapters for Lofn to join:

    Stop. That was decided long ago.

    You're an idiot.
    >> Red Machine D !gFpqlrwBDI 12/24/09(Thu)19:30 No.7275139


    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:32 No.7275151
    "Erm... I seek the Emprah?"

    "Aren't we all? I just kinda wish he'd, you know, seek me out instead. Anything else?"

    "Well, I might also like a transfer out of here, no offense. Maybe to the Black Templars or something. I heard thier kickin' some pretty sweet ass this time of year."

    "No, s'cool. Some actual Marine experience looks good on a resume when applying for the big boy chapters. Now, here is the hardest of all the questions."


    "This one has broken lesser man by the sheer weight of itself."

    "By the Emprah."

    "And philosophers have pondered it for eons."


    "Will you get me a beer from the fridge over there?"

    What sort of beer will Lofn get?
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:33 No.7275153

    "Um, my quest? What was it again? Grandpa?"

    "To destroy the Eldar"

    "To destroy the Eldar!!"
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:33 No.7275163
    stop trying to rewrite our already shitty characters, Lofns a girl you soppy cunt.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:34 No.7275164

    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:34 No.7275169
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:35 No.7275173
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:35 No.7275178
         File1261701331.jpg-(36 KB, 300x574, pbr.jpg)
    36 KB
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:36 No.7275182
    eww fuck off weeaboo
    >> Red Machine D !gFpqlrwBDI 12/24/09(Thu)19:36 No.7275183
    Get this 40shit off the front page, /tg/ is not for your failass fanfiction. It is for traditional games and my glorious persona.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:36 No.7275184
    rolled 1, 4, 5, 6 = 16

    She doesn't know what a beer looks like so she grabs him a 5 hour energy shot.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:37 No.7275194

    Samuel Motherfucking Jackson.

    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:38 No.7275195

    We wish you a merry christmas too you jolly old bastard
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:39 No.7275207
         File1261701598.jpg-(321 KB, 729x1024, 2086299274_ab3975c2a4_b.jpg)
    321 KB

    She just grabbed this one based on the cool label art.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:41 No.7275217
         File1261701686.jpg-(89 KB, 600x460, Objection Law and Order.jpg)
    89 KB
    I assume you mean Sam Adams.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:42 No.7275227
    "Well, seeing as you put our Chapter Master into a coma-"

    "Why did we even have an energy drink in there in the first place?" One marine asked.

    "-it falls on you to become the new Chapter Master."

    "Huh?" Lofn asked, "Why?"

    "Because the rest of us don't want the job. Get to it, skippy."

    As Chapter Master of the Lazy Marines, what shall be Lofn's first duty?
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:43 No.7275239
    Getting laid in the name of the EMPRA
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:43 No.7275242

    Taking out the trash in the rec room. One of the most challenging feats required of any Lazy Marine.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:44 No.7275249

    Treating the First Company to a big dinner at TGIF
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:47 No.7275277

    Someone hasn't seen Dave's impression of Samuel L. Jackson selling beer.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:48 No.7275282
    1. Getting snacks
    2. Picking new vidya gaems
    3. Managing the competitive Lounging Regimen for the squad
    4. Setting up challenging sleep/nap-time requirements
    5. Complaining to the servitor to clean up this pigsty. GeeeEEZZ!
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:48 No.7275285
    rolled 1, 2, 1, 4 = 8


    Cool, I won that one.

    She needs to get some armor....and find a way to fit into it.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:55 No.7275343
    You gonna finish this one off, OP? We're waiting.........
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:56 No.7275346
    >What is your name?
    The correct response is "I cant be bothered remembering something like that"
    >What is your quest?
    The correct response is "I have to have a quest? Aww man that sounds too much like work cant someone else do it?"
    >Can you get me a beer?
    The correct response is "But the fridge is way over there! Cant the servitor get it?"

    Anyway OP is a faggot so die in a fire.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)19:58 No.7275363
    "Okay, as Chapter Master, I order all of you to... go on a Waugh or whatever you Space Marines do. In the name of the Emprah."

    "Sure thing."


    "Don't you mean, 'Waughtever'?"

    "Dude, shut up."

    "Right then," Lofn said, "You all get to that. I'll be in whatever passes as an office around here."

    Later, Lofn stole a ship to get the hell out of there.

    "This is WAY too much for a girl like me. Yes, girl. I don't care what the fuck my grandpa says. Seriously, he needs to get laid. Better yet, I need to get laid before this shit kills me."

    New objective: Get laid. How?
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)20:00 No.7275382
    Ask Aunt Macha for advice on how to get laid.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)20:09 No.7275482

    Find Callidus Assassin, engage in acts of lesbianism.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)20:09 No.7275485
    Step. 1 get naked.
    Step. 2 Run into Random Underhive.
    Collect orgasm.
    >> /d/eviating Ca/tg/irl 12/24/09(Thu)20:11 No.7275505

    How could this possibly go wrong!?
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)20:14 No.7275546

    Find Eldrad, use him to get laid. He'll never expect his own granddaughter to WANT him to be a dick (in an overly literal sense, of course).
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)21:28 No.7276164
    "Well..." Macha pondered this for a sec while Lofn pondered what she was doing below the vid screen, "Well, I think Vindicare Assasins are wary of seduction these days. So, who do we have from Officio Assassinorum? Eversor?"

    "Do I look like I wat my first time to be drug-induced rage rape?"

    "Okay, Cullexus?"


    "Fine. Callidus?"

    "I'm not into girls, Aunt Macha! And why an assassin!?"

    "Well, I just figured you had your mother's tastes. Oh well. How about checking out a Hive City? I heard the mon'keigh there are pretty easy."

    "Can you imagine all the fucked up STD's must be made Necromunda alone?"

    "Good point. Well, incest is always on option."

    "I'm not a lesbian, Aunt Macha!"

    "Not me. Eldrad."


    "Fine, fine."

    Need more suggestions.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)21:32 No.7276188
    Travel to Terra.
    Proceed to Golden Throne.
    Find Emprah.
    Receive hot dickings.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)21:32 No.7276196
    Fap Tau
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)21:33 No.7276201

    Ok, ok, literal dickishness on Eldrad's part is out, but he could still use his dickery to help, because let's face it, little miss "eternal virgin" isn't going to be much help is she? Besides, it was his crazy idea that started this whole mess, he should at least help.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)21:39 No.7276247
    Won't work, he sucks at assault.

    Why not the Phallussar? He's always willing to do the Emperor's Work.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)21:39 No.7276252
    "Well, you could always try what I'm trying and fuck the God-Emperor of Man-kind. Ha!"


    "Wait, no, I was joking, Lofn. Emprah's mine!"

    "Bye, Aunt Macha."

    "Don't you hang up on me you man stealing ho-"


    Now how to get to the Golden Throne for some Divine Imperial dicking?
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)21:55 No.7276407
    You got a ship! Use that!
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)21:57 No.7276421

    Pierce the heavens with your ship, so that the Emperor will pierce YOUR "heavens"!
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)22:00 No.7276447

    Convince Eldrad to help us by mentioning how it would let him fuck with Macha's head some more.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)22:27 No.7276733
    "Wait, I got a ship- I can just fly there! Thousands of light years away. Past all the orbital defense of Sol. Into the heart of the Imper- shit. Okay thing, Lofn! Wait, the Webway! I can pierce the heavens and get my 'heavens pierced'! Yeah, just need to type the coordinates. Don't know the coordinates. Call Eldrad to find out the coordinates."

    In Ulthwe...

    Eldrad turns the vid screen on but doesn't look at it. He does say, "Hello, abomination of a grandson of mine. How goes Space Marine training?"

    "New plan, grandpa! And, er, new gender too."


    "I'm gonna go lose my virginity to the God Emperor of Man-kind!"

    "Oh for the sake of Ynnead! Can any of my descendant keep mon'keigh out of their pants?"

    "It'll piss off Macha."

    "You have my interest."

    "I need the Webway coordinates to the Golden Throne, gramps."

    "Done and why don't I send a Warp Spider over with the Staff of Ulthamar?"

    "Isn't that a bit risky to send the craftworld's most prized artifact on what is essential a 1 out of a 100 time one way ticket to Hell?"

    "Yes, but if we lose it, I can just say I planned this whole chirade from the start. Nobody will question that."

    "And are you sure its vast power won't consume me?"

    "I dunno."


    [] Take the Staff of Ulthamar.
    [] Request something a little less valuable/dangerous.
    [] Just jump to the Golden Throne already!
    [] Something else
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)22:31 No.7276764
    Take Staff of Ulthamar, use to remove hymen to make actual sex more enjoyable and less painful
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)23:07 No.7277133
    Fuck that, use it to awaken the Emprah. No one wants to fuck a corpse.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)23:08 No.7277145

    ...why not do both?
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)23:11 No.7277167
    Why bone the Emprah when his reincarnation is walking around?

    Find LIttle-E, fuck his brains out.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)23:26 No.7277279

    Get into webway.

    Find Commorrogh

    Receive hot hot Dark Eldar action.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)23:31 No.7277323
    Lofn looked out the view port, the flashing colors of the webway passing her by. She fingered long, hard, stiff length of Staff of Ulthamar. To one side were the bloody tissues after her first... experimentations with the staff. She had no idea that the staff had a Vibrate setting.

    She exited the vessel in the throne room, landing on some Custodes. She exited in the seemingly empty room, surprised by the lack of guards. The only thing in the room was the wasted corpse of the God Emperor of Man-kind.

    Lofn hefted the Staff of Ulthamar, gathering the warp for a rejuvenating stream of power that would ressurect the Scion of Man-kind and bring about a new Golden Age.


    Lofn was startled, losing her concentration and the vast warp power disippating. Lofn turned to look at the boy, young man, standing oh so casually by the Golden Throne.

    "Hello... who're you?"

    "My name is unimportant, miss. My titles you may know me by my titles. The Star Child, for example."

    "Never heard of it," Lofn said.

    "Then how 'bout the God Emperor of Man-kind?"

    Lofn pointed to the Corpse God on the Golden Throne. In response, the boy kicked it.

    "This old hunk of junk? I haven't use it in 10,000 years!"

    "Look, I don't have time for-"

    She looked him right in the eye and she fell to her knees. A presence in the warp that outstipped Eldrad by far and possibly even the Gods of Chaos, a presence that powered the Astronomicon as an afterthought, a presence that was very much present, thank you very much!


    "That's me. But, ya know, everyone calls me Lil' E."

    What now!?
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)23:33 No.7277339
    Tell him to get his clothes off, he's gettin' laid.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)23:35 No.7277354

    1. Take Lil'E to Commorrogh, it's like 40k's version of Vegas!
    3. Profit.
    >> Anonymous 12/24/09(Thu)23:58 No.7277515
    Slannesh is pleased by the pedo. Bless the pedo!
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)00:12 No.7277661
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)00:14 No.7277685

    Lil' E and Lofn are good stuff.
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)00:28 No.7277842
    "Alright, buddy. Take off all your clothes!"


    "I came halfway across the galaxy for your cock. You take off your clothes right this second, mister!"

    "Fine! Fine! One God-Cock comin' up, lady. Fuck, your pushier then the SoBs."

    Lofn bit her lips as she got a load of Dat Ass. Unable to take it anymore, she pounced his Imperial Nakedness and dragged him into the ship."

    Later on...

    "Ooooooo yeah," Lofn moaned in the afterglow.

    "Eh, I've had better."

    Ooooo! Lofn just got major dissed. What now?
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)00:29 No.7277853
    Well fuck
    i cant find any of my Lil'E pics
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)00:31 No.7277879
    That better be E reminiscing of his original body's sexual escapades. Lil'E, not a virgin? D:
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)00:32 No.7277893
    Pout; not because she cares, it was apparently AWESOME for her, but he should feel at least a little bad about it.

    Then ask him if he's ready to go again.
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)00:35 No.7277922
    Aren't they BOTH just kids though?
    >> The Collector !EXVlxJM9Rg 12/25/09(Fri)00:36 No.7277935
         File1261719388.jpg-(110 KB, 600x600, 1204014593834.jpg)
    110 KB
    You called?
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)00:37 No.7277947
    "Well, we've got plenty of time to work on it. Besides, the only reason I haven't had better is that I haven't had ANY before this."
    >> The Collector !EXVlxJM9Rg 12/25/09(Fri)00:38 No.7277959
         File1261719519.jpg-(554 KB, 689x2727, 1225439878513.jpg)
    554 KB
    'Cuss I got what you need.
    >> The Collector !EXVlxJM9Rg 12/25/09(Fri)00:46 No.7278050
         File1261719960.jpg-(112 KB, 600x600, 1204016682832.jpg)
    112 KB
    Should I just post all of them?
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)00:48 No.7278080
    No. That isn't what this thread is about.
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)00:50 No.7278097
    Yeah, but there's plenty of room for both.
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)00:51 No.7278102
    >>7278050, please ignore >>7278080. He is extra-heretical, and his head is full of sawdust and lies. He has forgotten:
    >Tits are always relevant.
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)00:57 No.7278190
    I never said they weren't relevant. It IS true though that it would be a waste to post ~110 more images & thus 110 more posts in the thread that would speed it to autosage & then require a new thread to continue what otherwise wouldn't if he just posted a link to the download of all the shit he's collected.

    And then there's the fact that hijacking a on-topic thread for a mere image dump of old content is sort of a dick move.
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)01:08 No.7278328
    Read "Best Candy Ever" and go ahead and post a couple pics. I think they're cute.

    Lil' E frowns embarassingly, "Oh, come on. Don't pout like that! It was a Sister of Battle. You know those girls!"

    Lofn turned away, giving him the cold shoulder. Uncomfortably, Lil E got out of the makeshift bed and leaned against the control panel. That's when they jumped into Warp.

    Without a Geller Field.

    Sex + Half-Eldar + Staff of Ulthamar - Geller Field = Keeper of Secrets.

    The Greater Daemon of Slaanesh appears in the bridge.

    What now?
    >> The Collector !EXVlxJM9Rg 12/25/09(Fri)01:09 No.7278342
    There's only 19 Lil E pictures, and the OP seems to have left.
    But I understand, some other time then.
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)01:10 No.7278345
    What else? They do cocaine
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)01:11 No.7278359
    >> human crusader 12/25/09(Fri)01:37 No.7278686
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)01:44 No.7278748
    Give it puppy dog eyes, tame it with Power of D'awwwww
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)01:52 No.7278810
    Ultramarines. They're known to take half-Eldar.
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)02:05 No.7278912
    though I'm probably too late to have an influence... :(
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)02:09 No.7278965
    No I haven't!

    Lil E reaches out to the For- Warp and erects a Geller Field of his own will. The Keeper charges.

    "I will dine on your soul, Corpse God!"

    Lil E gestured and the daemon fell to it's knees.

    "Say hello to your Bitch Goddess for me! And tell her I'll be there for her at the End of Days to fuck her up the ass!"

    "Oh you mean you're really going too? My lord will be over joooooooooooooooooooy-" The Daemon's joy was drowned out by its banishment.

    Then, further the Deus Ex Machina, Lil' E sent them into the Webway.

    THEN he fainted.

    Lofn tsked, "Absolutley no stamina." She went to check the dash board, "Where are we going anyway?"

    The dash board read: Commorragh

    Oh shit! What now?
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)02:24 No.7279127
    Call Auntie Macha. She has a Commorragh travel guide if I remember correctly.
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)02:26 No.7279148
    Reasonable Marines are the best choice with their power of diplomacy
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)02:34 No.7279210
    Also rub the fact you got laid in her face
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)03:12 No.7279507

    "What do you want you-"

    "No time! Heading for Commorragh!"

    "What? Why the fuck are you heading there?"

    "After crazy sex with the reincarnation of the God Emperor of Man-kind, a Keeper of Secrets attacked us. He iced it and then sent us into the Webway with a collision course for Commorragh."

    "Okay, okay. I'm sending you a Travel Guide right now."

    "How will that help?"

    "Find Uncle Asdrubael, ruler of the Dark Eldar. Tell him who you are. He'll lend you a hand."

    "Oh, thanks."

    "Wait, who'd you say you fucked."

    "No time, gotta go, bye."



    What's our next move?
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)11:11 No.7282341
    Dark eldar raep time?
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)15:28 No.7284244
    Look for the goddamn dark eldar?
    >> Anonymous 12/25/09(Fri)15:31 No.7284272
    Blood Angels.

    Delete Post [File Only]
    Style [Yotsuba | Yotsuba B | Futaba | Burichan]