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  • File : 1274932450.jpg-(130 KB, 391x603, Recovered_JPEG_1468.jpg)
    130 KB Badly Written Fap Fiction Incoming Goshujin-Sama 05/26/10(Wed)23:54 No.10081813  
    >> Anonymous 05/26/10(Wed)23:56 No.10081870
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    SOLDIER YOU WILL TURN THAT LMG RIGHT SIDE UP THIS FUCKING INSTANT
    >> Anonymous 05/26/10(Wed)23:58 No.10081889
    Is that a penis?
    >> Anonymous 05/26/10(Wed)23:58 No.10081896
         File1274932696.jpg-(151 KB, 500x376, it begins.jpg)
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    >Goshujin-Sama is here
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/26/10(Wed)23:58 No.10081905
         File1274932715.jpg-(633 KB, 800x1125, Recovered_JPEG_8419.jpg)
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    Two minutes
    >> Gaow? 05/26/10(Wed)23:58 No.10081909
    >>10081889
    No, it's an MG42. Men tend to make that mistake.
    >> Anonymous 05/26/10(Wed)23:58 No.10081912
    I DON'T WANT TO DIE
    >> Anonymous 05/26/10(Wed)23:59 No.10081922
    YES GOSHUJIN-SAMA IS HERE!
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/26/10(Wed)23:59 No.10081927
    WHAT HAS COME BEFORE:

    First Chapter: Part 1: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9047710/

    Most Recent Chapter: Part 28: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9868374/

    If you want to find the rest, they should be tagged "Maid Quest" on the archive.

    -----

    If you're pathetic enough to follow this fucking shit on twitter, it's at http://twitter.com/maidquesttg

    -----

    You are a young man who has suddenly come into an unexpected inheritance: a rather large mansion and a sizeable amount of money. However, your rather eccentric uncle has put a secret rider in his will: in order to inherit the money, you must:

    1. Repair the rather old and decaying house.
    2. Hire a full staff of maids to upkeep it.

    At least, that's the basic idea. Things have gotten confused since then.

    Loot
    Alien Repair Bots
    Reticulan Combat Android in a Sphere
    Demonic Ace of Spades - Alicia's Phylactery
    "Hidden Trait" - Activate to discover something mysterious about yourself previously unknown to all.

    --Your Costumes:--
    Magician (Magic Missile, Shield, Ritual Magic)

    --Unassigned Costumes:--
    None
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:00 No.10081931
    YAAAAAY, I'm here at the beginning!
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:00 No.10081933
    --Mansion Status:--
    Facilities: Beachfront property, Huge Yacht ("Kat"), Secret Passages (Connects Master Bedroom to Maid Quarters).
    Kitchen: Average (3 of 5) -> Quest: HIRE A CHEF
    Decor: Good (4 of 5)
    Gardens: Average (3 of 5)
    Repair: PERFECT (6 of 5)
    Beach: Good (4 of 5)

    STAFF:
    Reginald, Your Butler (Devoted)

    Samantha, Your Head Maid (Devoted) - LOVE

    Koyomi, your Japanese gamer science nerd. (Warm) - SEXED

    SISTER FUCKING CARMINE, THE FUCKING FEMALE FUCKING ANGRY MARINE! (Neutral)
    - Costume Option: Sexy Commissar
    - Costume Add-on: Blood Splatter

    Kristopher, formerly Katherine, the redheaded trap-kun (Distant)

    Felicia, the cute catgirl (Warm) - SEXED

    Jehanne, the paladin of Bahamut (Devoted) - SEXED

    Alicia, the former Demon Queen of Lust, now in possession of Katherine's Love (Warm)

    15 XP

    Day 12 of 30

    You are now in your bedroom. There is a portal to hell in your closet and all the hordes of Inferno are running towards it getting ready to pour into our dimension.

    WHAT DO?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:00 No.10081938
         File1274932852.jpg-(73 KB, 512x600, BIRRY.jpg)
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    stop fagging up /tg/ with this horrible weeaboo shit
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:01 No.10081942
    Put on Magician uniform, get ready to smite bitches.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:01 No.10081949
    >>10081889
    >short hair
    >flat chest
    >crotch bulge
    >lack of 'dat ass'

    "Men, I think we have a boy in our ranks. Still I have to ask... would you tap that?!"
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:01 No.10081951
    >>10081938
    And our first troll of the night!

    You have just gained the TROLL BONUS: +5 XP!

    New XP total: 20
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:02 No.10081972
    Alicia knows rituals, let's try to close it working in tandem with our magic abilities. That will at least delay them until a really strong one cockslaps them and decides to enter with its own portal.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:04 No.10082016
    >>10081972
    >>10081942

    You put on your robe and wizard hat. . .

    AND THEN ROLL FOR INITIATIVE.

    Someone roll 1d6.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:04 No.10082023
    Call for Reginald, Jehanne and Carmine. Get ready to kick ass for Disneyland.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:04 No.10082026
    Fucking FINALLY.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:05 No.10082038
    >>10081951

    I love you XD

    We need to get that thing sealed. Look to Alicia for help. Also, consider calling for reinforcements.

    REGINALD, WE FUCKED UP BADLY.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:05 No.10082046
    rolled 2 = 2

    FUCK
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:07 No.10082076
    >>10082046

    > 1

    You have initiative.

    Status:

    You: 20 Spirit
    Alicia: 20 Spirit

    FIRST ROUND, WHAT DO?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:08 No.10082081
         File1274933286.jpg-(66 KB, 480x360, 3.jpg)
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    > Call for Reginald, Jehanne and Carmine. Get ready to kick ass for Disneyland.

    I second this plan of action
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:08 No.10082088
    >>10082076
    dance
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:09 No.10082106
    rolled 2 = 2

    Use the handbasket to create a moebius portal with this other portal! Ask Alicia on how much time should that take.

    We have guns that can buy time
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:09 No.10082109
    >>10082081
    >>10082038
    >>10082023
    >>10081972

    Your Action: Call for Reinforcements.
    Alicia's Action: Attempt to Seal the Gate.

    CONFIRM? Y/N
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:09 No.10082111
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    >>10082076

    Destroy the support beams that hold up the roof of our bedroom. Let the fuckers wade through rubble.

    How? I dunno, magic missile it?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:10 No.10082116
    >>10082109
    Confirming.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:10 No.10082119
    >>10082109

    >scream for help like a bitch

    .... this is a smarter plan, I concur.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:13 No.10082162
    >>10082109
    Confirm that shit, though how long for those reinforcements to arrive?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:13 No.10082168
    >>10082109
    confirming
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:14 No.10082169
    >>10082076
    do we still have the ass pistol?
    If so, use it
    or, whatever gun we have,

    say something vaguely prayer-like as we shoot, they are demons after all
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:14 No.10082176
    Ok, confirming reinforce
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:15 No.10082186
    >>10082169
    we went down there armed to the teeth
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:15 No.10082188
    >>10082119
    >>10082116

    "REGINALD!" you scream. "WE'VE GOT A PROBLEM HERE!!!!"

    A moment later, you hear booted feet running up the stairs. . . and then your butler, Reginald, bursts into the room, confused. "Young Master? What is. . . Oh dear. Opened a gate to hell, now did we? That's not good at all."

    > REGINALD has been added to your party.

    "Get in here and help!" you shout to Reginald. "Alicia, quick! Seal the gate!"

    Alicia sits on the ground, still stunned from how you dragged her through the portal in the middle of her big self-sacrifice scene. . .

    > Your Affection: 12

    . . . and gets back up. "Shut up!" she shouts to you. "Don't tell me what to do, you idiot!"

    > Alicia rolls Magic.

    Alicia raises her hands and spreads her wings, which glow with a deep purple light. She begins to chant a spell, and the gate starts to slowly close. . .

    Only to be stopped, and slowly pried open, as a monster looking like some sort of enormous, frost-feathered bird appears in the gate. It opens its four-beaked mouth, revealing nine barbed tongues, and screams at you in a voice that sounds like the shrieking of the damned, causing frost to build up on the edges of your closet door. . .

    > SHANTAK, DEMON OF FROST has arrived
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:16 No.10082212
    >>10082188

    QUICK, RUN TO OUR COMPUTER AND START CRYSIS WHILE REGINALD PUTS DOWN COVER FIRE.

    After about 30 seconds on demo mode, the machine should melt down into a puddle of liquid fire.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:17 No.10082216
    >>10082188
    Magic missile to the face or pull out the ass gun and shoot it in the goddamn mouth. Better yet find a way to do both at once!
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:17 No.10082221
    >>10082188
    Kill it with fire! Wait, on second thought, screw that, grab the napalm :D
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:18 No.10082234
    >>10082188

    >Alicia sits on the ground, still stunned from how you dragged her through the portal in the middle of her big self-sacrifice scene. . .

    I see our main character is still giving convention flying jump-kicks in the face. reading the last thread that I missed; where he asks about Maximillian just as Alica goes to sip her tea. Fantastic.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:18 No.10082252
    >>10082188

    SHANTAK reaches through the portal, and extends a nine-taloned claw towards Alicia. "YOU!" it hisses. "I HAVE NOT FORGOTTEN THE HUMILIATIONS YOU HEAPED UPON ME! NOW THAT YOU ARE POWERLESS, I SHALL DRAG YOU BACK INTO MY DOMAIN AND VISIT UPON YOU TEN THOUSAND TORMENTS!"

    > Shantak's Attack: 3
    > Alicia's Defense: 12

    Alicia manages to avoid the slashing claws, and recoils back from the portal, trembling. . . behind SHANTAK, you can see other demons fighting amongst each other to reach the portal, all of them screaming for Alicia's blood. . .

    WHAT DO?
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:19 No.10082267
    You've already drawn your ass-gun, by the way. You are armed.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:19 No.10082270
    >>10082252
    Kick ass and chew bubblegum.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:20 No.10082282
    Do we have bombs? Can we explode SHANTAK?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:20 No.10082302
    >>10082270
    I think we're out of bubblegum
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:20 No.10082303
    >>10082282
    You do not. Reginald may.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:21 No.10082316
    Can we use the shield ability we have from our magician's costume on Alicia? Then become slightly horrified at the thought of what she, as a demon lord of lust, did that demon to make him so angry.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:21 No.10082317
    >>10082303
    Ask Reginald to explode SHANTAK with bombs.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:21 No.10082319
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    >>10082252
    >>10082267

    Level the FEARSOME POWER of our .38 Charter Arms Undercover and LET FLY.

    Those are +P HOLLOWPOINTS. THEIR FELL POWER SHALL BE FELT.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:21 No.10082321
    Cast magic missile.

    Also, when we defeat, tell it to send a message to Tzeentch: Fuck you.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:22 No.10082329
    >>10082316
    >>10082317

    Your Action: Cast SHIELD on Alicia
    Reginald's Action: Arc Light Fire Mission
    Alicia's Action: Continue to close the portal.

    CONFIRM?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:22 No.10082343
    >>10082329
    confirm
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:23 No.10082347
    >>10082329
    CONFIRM
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:23 No.10082353
    >. "I HAVE NOT FORGOTTEN THE HUMILIATIONS YOU HEAPED UPON ME! NOW THAT YOU ARE POWERLESS, I SHALL DRAG YOU BACK INTO MY DOMAIN AND VISIT UPON YOU TEN THOUSAND TORMENTS!"

    You all now realize this probably means Alicia raped a greater ice demon with nine tongues for shits and giggles.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:23 No.10082358
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    >>10082188
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:25 No.10082386
    >>10082353
    Kinky?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:26 No.10082414
    >>10082329

    CONFIRM.

    WILLY-PETE AND GAMMON BOMBS UP IN THAT BITCH
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:27 No.10082435
    >>10082386
    YOU BET YOUR ANAL CIRCUMFERENCE IT IS
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:27 No.10082438
    CONFIRM.

    Remind demons that WE are on the business of humiliating Alicia now
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:29 No.10082463
    "THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A COLD DAY AT DISNEYLAND!"
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:29 No.10082472
    >>10082347
    >>10082343

    You begin by raising your hands and shouting out the magic words: "SHEELDSOPPREDALLERT!" There is a high pitched whine, a burst of red light, and then a blue sphere appears around Alicia.

    Reginald, seeing the hordes behind the demon, knocks over a table, drags you and Alicia behind it, and then gets out his cell phone. "Samantha, if you would be a dear, would you call in a fire mission on my coordinates, please? Ranging shot."

    He then pulls out a heavy-caliber pistol and begins to open fire at the hordes behind SHANTAK

    > Reginald: 18
    > The Hordes: 6

    He scores a hit on one demon and knocks it back and down.

    Alicia turns back towards the portal and raises her hands again, continuing to concentrate on closing the damn thing. . . as she does, she shouts at you, over her shoulder, "WHY!? Why the hell did you save me!? You don't even LIKE me, I've been nothing but a bitch to you!"

    > Alicia's Magic Check is a secret

    As she finishes shouting, SHANTAK opens up its gaping abyssal maw and exhales frost into the room!

    > SHANTAK: 6
    > You 8
    > Alicia 8
    > Reginald 24

    Although it breathes, you are all safely behind the table and take no damage.

    > 6+ check for more monsters: 6

    SHANTAK tumbles into the room as a second demon pushes his way past him and into the entrance to the portal. "GET OUT OF MY WAY!" he roars, wreathed in flame. "I'M THE ONE WHO GETS FIRST DIBS AT RAPING THAT BITCH TO DEATH!"

    > HOGO, demon of FIRE, has arrived.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:30 No.10082486
    SHIT YES MAID QUEST
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:31 No.10082501
    >>10082472
    "I said I was going to take you to Disneyland, and I'm not going back on that."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:31 No.10082504
    >>10082472

    >"WHY!? Why the hell did you save me!? You don't even LIKE me, I've been nothing but a bitch to you!"

    "PERVERTS MOVE IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS. NOW SHUT THE FUCK UP AND CAST."
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:31 No.10082507
    Current Status:

    You: 20 Spirit
    Alicia: 20 Spirit
    Reginald: 60 Spirit

    SHANTAK: ?? Spirit
    HOGO: ?? Spirit
    The Horde: 4 Spirit

    WHAT DO?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:32 No.10082516
    So...what happened to our automatic shotgun? We should use that.

    Also: a request for clarification. Do we get to decide what the Hidden Trait is or is it some randomly rolled shit?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:32 No.10082524
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    >Samantha, if you would be a dear, would you call in a fire mission on my coordinates, please? Ranging shot.

    >we're indoors
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:32 No.10082529
    >>10082516
    If you choose to activate your Hidden Trait, you will have a choice between two or three options.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:33 No.10082542
    SHOOT GUNS AT DAEMONS
    AND >>10082501
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:33 No.10082544
    "To be fair, I'm not a saint either. Just look at my fa.mi.ly"

    Let's try to trick Shantak and Hogo into bumping, that should be fun. Probably a called shot or something.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:34 No.10082559
    >>10082524
    >nonlethalattacks.jpg

    Kill the hordes first?
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:34 No.10082565
    >>10082542
    >>10082516

    Your Action: Automatic Shotgun
    Alicia's Action: Close Gate
    Reginald's Action: ???
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:34 No.10082570
    >>10082472
    >demon of fire
    >demon of frost
    Oh, swell. Too bad we can't make them cancel each other out... can we?

    Make them pissed off at each other, try and make them fight. Something like "Watch out for that real strong looking one! Nevermind the other one!"
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:35 No.10082578
    >>10082529

    Let's do it, it's go time.

    Also unload our shotgun shells into the hordes to finish them off.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:36 No.10082586
    Call for help again, this time Jehanne.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:36 No.10082588
    >>10082565
    >>10082570
    Have Reginald try to get them to fight somehow.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:36 No.10082593
    >>10082544
    confirm trick SHANTAK and HOGO into bumping
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:36 No.10082599
    >>10082578
    >>10082586

    Your Action: Automatic Shotgun
    Alicia's Action: Close Gate
    Reginald's Action: Call for Aid: Jehanne

    Also, you will activate your Hidden Trait.

    Confirm? Y/N
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:37 No.10082607
    >>10082599
    Works for me
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:37 No.10082615
    >>10082529
    Right. Thanks. Is there a large-ass list of possibilities we could get a look at or what?

    Also: scream for our lady paladin. She should be useful against the demons.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:37 No.10082616
    >>10082565

    Reginald's action- softball a GAMMON BOMB near the demon of frost; see if you can't pinball the fucker into the DEMON OF FIRE.

    As for answering the loli, GO WITH THE TROLLIEST ANSWER.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:38 No.10082624
    >>10082599
    I guess now would be an interesting time, but I feel like we could just be making our situation worse.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:38 No.10082628
    I can go for shotgunning hordes. Specially with an artillery strike coming down

    otherwise Shantak/Hogo shananigans
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:38 No.10082637
    >>10082599
    confirm
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:39 No.10082639
    >>10082599
    >CONFIRM
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:39 No.10082649
    >>10082599

    CONFIRM
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:40 No.10082666
    do we have slugs for our shotgun?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:40 No.10082669
    Hey, Goshujin-Sama, don't leave us for so long next time.

    I missed this thread.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:41 No.10082681
    >>10082624
    >I feel like we could just be making our situation worse.
    Unless 'Deathly Allergic: Demons' is an option I don't think it can get much worse.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:41 No.10082683
    >>10082669
    open the twitter page late at night, refresh while idling

    LET'S SHOTGUN DEMONS
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:41 No.10082687
    >>10082599
    >>10082607
    >>10082588
    >>10082593

    I'll hold off on this turn while I take care of some bookkeeping since there seems to suddenly be a new vote. . .

    All right, here goes. . . your HIDDEN TRAIT has activated. You may select one of the following "bloodline options" to activate.

    1> Suddenly Minions: It turns out that you have suddenly gained a reasonable-sized horde of Minions who will follow your every command. Who knew?

    2> Magic Bloodline: The blood of the mages in your past suddenly activates. Your magic power is greatly boosted, and you become a full-out magician with a wider spell list than just Magic Missile and Shield.

    3. Favored of the Divine: You have attracted the attention of some deity. You become a paladin of that deity, and must follow their code of behavior, but gain additional powers.

    CHOOSE YOUR FATE
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:41 No.10082690
    >>10082681
    It would explain why we're so hated.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:43 No.10082713
    >>10082687
    2> Magic Bloodline
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:43 No.10082714
    MAGIC BLOODLINE!

    BE FUCKING BROKEN!
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:43 No.10082718
    >>10082666
    Well we certainly wouldn't take an unloaded shotgun to hell with us.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:43 No.10082722
    >>10082687

    Guy who won the Hidden Trait here. Happy to see this list, SOO HAPPY.

    I'd go with MAGEEEK. Casters > All, 3.5 IS TEH BORKEN LAWL
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:43 No.10082723
    GUYS

    2. We are our won god. Otherwise how much potential beamspam we have i dunno
    3. We have a god. May or may not have repercussions depending on the god
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:43 No.10082726
    >>10082687
    Do we get to choose our diety?

    Also, Magic Bloodlines anyway.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:44 No.10082736
    >>10082718
    it was a question of whether we had slugs or shot loaded
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:44 No.10082739
    >>10082687

    Hard choice, but I vote for wizardry!
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:44 No.10082740
    >>10082713
    confirm 2
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:44 No.10082746
    We must ask ourselves- what will let us troll both friends and allies the hardest?

    Minions have potential here. Let us weigh carefully.

    Goshujin, what are you drinking? I think I'll join you with the same selection.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:44 No.10082749
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    >>10082687
    Man, screw the magic. I want a pack of these adorable blighters running about the mansion. Voting for minions.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:45 No.10082752
    Protagonist used Thundara! It's fucking broken!
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:45 No.10082753
    >>10082713
    >>10082714
    Another for the Magic Bloodline.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:45 No.10082754
    Overwhelming vote for Magic Bloodline. . . you have chosen your Hidden Trait. It will activate at a later turn.

    Now, current actions. Alicia will close the gate, it seems, but what do you and Reginald do?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:45 No.10082763
    >>10082749
    Nah dude, get magic. Then we can use Domination as a spell, so we don't even need minions.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:46 No.10082766
    >>10082746
    Currently I'm sipping port and eating silton cheese and crackers. I'm in that kind of mood.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:46 No.10082772
    >>10082754
    Attempt call everyone in the goddamn house into this room. Reginald brings the pain and defends Alicia while we she closes the gate by capping the demons in the head.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:46 No.10082773
    >>10082687
    Magic bloodline.

    3 would be nice, but unless there's a god of irredeemable perverts I don't think we could follow a paladins code.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:46 No.10082782
         File1274935612.jpg-(23 KB, 992x576, dragons_breath.jpg)
    23 KB
    do we have any dragonbreath shotgun rounds?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:46 No.10082783
    Reginald kills hordes
    we try to null Shantak and Hogo by lolelementals
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:47 No.10082796
    >>10082754

    Vote for shooting at the hordes while Reggie calls for Jeanne. I have no idea how we'd make these 2 demons fight each other, but it would be great if we could.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:47 No.10082797
    Okay, here goes.

    Alicia closes the gate
    Reginald attacks.
    You: 1. Attack, 2. Attempt to cause infighting, 3. Call for reinforcements.

    Vote nao.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:48 No.10082805
    >>10082754
    Our guns shoot bullets? Do we have any guns that shoot knives? Or a rocket launcher that launches explosive chainsaws? Because I have to imagine that would be more effective.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:48 No.10082812
    >>10082754
    SHOOT! SHOOOOOOOT!
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:48 No.10082814
    >>10082754

    Go Samson on this motherfucker. BRING DOWN THE ROOF. Literally. Hopefully Reggie has something on him that will accomplish this.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:49 No.10082827
    Well, call reinforcements. The artillery will take care of the rest, right?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:49 No.10082830
    >>10082797

    >Infighting

    Let's do this. I doubt the mighty power of our fearsome .38 is going to do much against demons.

    We need a Deagle.

    INB4 SHOT PLACEMENT
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:49 No.10082834
    >>10082796
    2. cause infighting by seizing on the fact the fire one wants to go first.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:50 No.10082844
    >>10082797

    We're pretty inflammatory, let's try to cause infighting.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:50 No.10082847
    >>10082797
    We have a magical awakening soon, so lets attack now. Unload all our ammo into these fuckers, and maybe taunt them about who's stronger while we're at it
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:51 No.10082859
    >>10082797
    cause infighting
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:51 No.10082861
    >>10082834

    Compare the fire demon's dick to the frost demon's dick in a mocking fashion. "To death? You might bore her to death, haha!"
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:51 No.10082869
    Infighting about who is a bad ass enough demon to take Alicia
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:53 No.10082889
    >>10082861
    Seconded
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:53 No.10082890
    >>10082861
    Or point out the ice one will melt before he gets his turn if the fire one goes first. Tell him the only chance he has got is if he disposes of him first. Or mock their dicks, both are good.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:53 No.10082895
    we should use the miniature grenades rounds
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:54 No.10082907
    >>10082797
    >3. Call for reinforcements.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:54 No.10082909
    >>10082861
    confirm
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:55 No.10082919
    Note to self: If / when this is over, seeing how we tend to run into demons on a regular basis we should get Koyomi on developing the BFG9000.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:55 No.10082929
    >>10082797
    Attempt to cause infighting for great trolling.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:56 No.10082935
    Infighting is a-go.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)00:56 No.10082942
    >>10082859
    >>10082844
    >>10082834
    >>10082830

    So the first thing that happens is that you hear a CRUMP sound, and then a whistling sound, and then a mortar shell falls right through your bedroom skylight and lands in the middle of the room. . .

    > You: 3 damage
    > Alicia: 4 damage
    > Reginald: 1 damage
    > SHANTAK: 3 damage
    > HOGO: 3 damage
    > The Horde: 6 damage

    As the mortar shell flies through the portal and lands amongst the demons, you see them hurled away, screaming in terror as the good ol' modern artillery blasts them to smithereens. "Get down!" you shout, and cover Alicia with your body, as some debris showers down on top of you.

    Alicia growls and slaps at you as you lay on top of her. "GET OFF of me!" she shouts. "Seriously, what the HELL is your problem? You think that just because you're nice to me, I'll suddenly turn good? Life doesn't work that way, you naive. . ."

    "Good, bad, you're STILL going to Disneyland!" you interrupt. "Now, let me think of a way to get these two assholes fighting each other. . ."

    > Reginald Acts: 6
    > SHANTAK defends: 3
    > SHANTAK takes 2 damage

    Reginald opens fire with his handgun as the blast clears, but doesn't manage to get in a good hit. The shot carries away a few feathers, but that's about it. "Young master!" Reginald calls out, as he sees more demons racing down the stairs of the tower. "This does not look good!"
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:58 No.10082972
         File1274936302.png-(624 KB, 414x600, maiddoom.png)
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    >infighting

    "NOT ENOUGH ROOM IN A LOLIGINA FOR TWO COCKS, GENTLEMEN. Please take a ticket and come to the front desk when your number is called."

    Something even demons fear- a Secretary of State office.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:59 No.10082999
    Troll demons for infighting. That's kill stealing, mate!
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)00:59 No.10083000
    >>10082942
    >"Young master!" Reginald calls out, as he sees more demons racing down the stairs of the tower. "This does not look good!"

    "Now would be a good time for some completely unlikely event to occur & turn the tide in our favor."
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)01:00 No.10083011
    Okay, I need something from you guys: I need one of you to come up with a snappy one-liner to spout off to get the demons to start infighting. Think of it as your GM telling you to do some damn roleplaying.

    In the meantime. . . SHANTAK pulls himself up from the mortar blast and screees in anger. "YOU FUCKER! i'LL KILL YOU LIMEY BASTARD!" he roars as he charges Reginald. . ."

    > SHANTAK: 18
    > Reginald: 18

    His razor-sharp claws CLANG against Reginald's fairbairn-sykes dagger as the grim-faced brit parries the attack. "Oh dear," Reginald grimaces. "You didn't wipe your feet. Terribly sorry, but I'm going to have to ask you to leave. . ."

    HOGO laughs. "PITIFUL FOOL!" he sneers at SHANTAK. "DEFEATED BY A HUMAN! LET ME SHOW YOU HOW WE FIRE DEMONS DO IT!"

    > HOGO Breathes FIRE!: 8
    > You: 8
    > Alicia: 12
    > Reginald: 36
    > SHANTAK: 12

    . . . and does nothing but light your bedsheets on fire.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:00 No.10083014
    >>10082942

    >mortar clean through the skylight

    God DAMN, Samantha is fucking good. What the hell is she using, a 60mm chemical mortar?

    Can Alica continue the sealing spell from outside the room? Because I vote we vacate the room and let Samantha hit the place with Willy-Pete while we cover the doorway.

    Then we can bring up Carmine and have her grapple a motherfucker.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:02 No.10083034
    >>10083011
    >snappy one-liner
    Make sure it starts with the phrase, "Your momma's so fat".
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:02 No.10083038
    >>10082942
    Holster our gun, walk up to the nearest demon, pick his big ass up and throw him. Throw him into the other demon, and send both of them tumbling through the portal.

    Put on a luchador mask beforehand, if necessary.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:03 No.10083045
    >>10083011

    I'm trying, I'm trying!

    >>10082972
    >>10082861

    Also:

    "You breathe fire like
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:03 No.10083052
    >>10083014
    We're gonna have to refurnish our room...

    Oh, well, the sheets were probably starting to smell anyway.

    Commence with the trollan and the infightan!
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:04 No.10083064
    >>10083011
    >I need one of you to come up with a snappy one-liner to spout off to get the demons to start infighting.
    How about a two-liner care of >>10082972
    >"NOT ENOUGH ROOM IN A LOLIGINA FOR TWO COCKS, GENTLEMEN. Please take a ticket and come to the front desk when your number is called."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:04 No.10083067
    >>10083014
    >>10083014
    if we have Carmine and have her grapple one then make it the ice demon as her rage will keep her warm.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:05 No.10083074
    >>10083011
    "I've made more impressive flames farting onto a match! Were you sucking on Frosty's cock earlier or what?"
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)01:05 No.10083081
    >>10083011
    >>10082972

    I think I found my snappy one-liner. . .

    -----

    "Alicia?" you say, as you see the demons bickering. "I have an idea. Trust me."

    "What?" Alicia asks, quizzically. "How the hell do you think you're going to handle this?"

    "Trust me. . . do you trust me?"

    > Affection: 8
    > Alicia's Cunning: 9

    -----
    Spend 1 XP to succeed this roll?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:05 No.10083084
    >>10083011
    "What's the matter, big guys? Afraid of being beaten by a puny little mortal?"
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:06 No.10083090
    "Best just watch out for Shantak, Alicia. Even if Hogo gets you he'll just misFIRE all over the bedsheets."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:06 No.10083097
    >>10083081
    Is this a trick question? YES.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:06 No.10083100
    Folks, Carmine isn't wearing her power armor anymore since she got the Commissar outfit if I remember correctly. She's sexy now, but she's not exactly too combat effective without it.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:06 No.10083103
    "Oh man, you guys are worse than ebony and ivory working together"
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:06 No.10083104
    >>10083081
    Spend 2 for good measure.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:06 No.10083107
    >>10083081
    >Spend 1 XP to succeed this roll?
    YES
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:07 No.10083116
    >>10083081
    Why the hell not, it's one xp.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:07 No.10083122
    >>10083081
    DO IT

    AFTER THAT IS MAGICAL SHOUJO TIEM
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:07 No.10083123
    "WHERE'D YOU LEARN TO BREATHE FIRE ASSHOLE, THE FUCKING RINGLING BROTHERS? FUCK OFF, OR I'LL RAPE YOU AFTER I'M DONE WITH ICE CUBE HERE."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:08 No.10083134
    >>10083107
    >>10083116
    plus we got 5xp from the troll at the start of this thread.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:08 No.10083135
    >>10083081
    >>10083104

    Spend 2.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:08 No.10083137
    >>10083081

    FUND IT. LITERALLY.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:08 No.10083146
         File1274936919.jpg-(85 KB, 935x724, maidbeam.jpg)
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    >>10083122
    This is what Alicia should do.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)01:09 No.10083153
    >>10083107
    >>10083097

    You only need one. New total is 19

    -----
    ". . . all right," Alicia says. "But if this is some stupid trick. . ."

    "Trust me," you say.

    And with that, you pick up your burning bedsheet and wave it over your head. "TRUCE! TRUCE!" you shout. "I SURRENDER!"

    -----
    > We are now out of combat
    -----

    SHANTAK and HOGO pause in the middle of their sneering and bickering and turn to look at you. "WHAT DO YOU WANT, PUNY MORTAL!?" SHANTAK growls.

    ". . . I want to surrender," you say.

    ". . . WHAT!?" Alicia howls. "You can't just. . ."

    You quickly clamp your hand over her mouth and grin at the two demons. "I've decided to let you guys have her," you say.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:10 No.10083170
    >>10083081
    Sure. It's 1 damn experience. We can get that through HOTBLOODED MANLINESS & VIRILITY or something.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:10 No.10083173
    brace for trolling
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:10 No.10083174
    >imply that the "fire breath" was weaker than the chili you eat for lunch.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:11 No.10083194
         File1274937098.jpg-(99 KB, 612x698, countertroll.jpg)
    99 KB
    >>10083173

    BRACE FOR IMPACT
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:11 No.10083199
    >>10083146
    If we luck out it's what WE'LL be doing only with more totally awesome lightning arcing off of it.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)01:12 No.10083212
    >>10083153

    "Young master!" Reginald says, appalled. "You cannot mean to let these people. . ."

    "Why not?" you say, off-handedly. "I mean, after all, this girl's been nothing but a bitch to me." You look down at Alicia and give her a significant look. "It's not like I like her, or anything. Or that I ever promised to take her to Disneyland."

    > Affection: 6
    > Alicia's Cunning: 9

    Alicia notices the tone of your voice, and elbows you in the ribs, hard. "ASSHOLE!" she shouts. "FUCKING BASTARD!" She starts to struggle in your arms, but not very hard.

    "See what I mean? Total bitch. Down, slut!" you sneer, and slap her across the face. Alicia falls down at your feet, putting a hand to her face, seemingly stunned. "Anyway," you say, walking over and putting your arm around one of the demons, "I was just thinking, you two want to bang her, right? She did you wrong, you're going to show her who's boss by giving her some good hot demon dicking, right? Sounds fine to met, just let me watch."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:14 No.10083250
    It's like I'm watching a cutscene in a real game :V
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:14 No.10083251
    >>10083212

    Ouch, fuck that hurts.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)01:15 No.10083263
    >>10083212
    SHANTAK and HOGO look at each other, then at you, then at Alicia, then shrug. "FINE BY ME," SHANTAK says.

    "I AM FINE WITH THIS," HOGO agrees.

    "Great!" you say, grinning like a used car salesman. "Now, the only question is, which of you two will go first?"

    "I WILL!" both demons say at the same time. They glare at each other.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:15 No.10083271
    >It's not like I like her, or anything.

    Now WE'RE the tsundere?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:15 No.10083277
    >>10083263
    Stand back, and try not to make your troll face too obvious.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:16 No.10083292
         File1274937399.png-(110 KB, 479x358, 1266014365310.png)
    110 KB
    >>10083212

    >Just let me watch

    I... actually have a /d/ folder that consists of at least 20% of this exact scenario.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:16 No.10083293
    >>10083250
    THIS IS NO MGS 4, BOY! NO MGS 4!
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:17 No.10083308
         File1274937436.jpg-(23 KB, 251x230, trollcigar.jpg)
    23 KB
    >>10083263
    Whisper to Reginald.

    "Fetch the Bren."

    Pull out cigar and do pic related.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:17 No.10083319
    >>10083271

    That was literally one of the first trolls we pulled. We pulled a pre-emptive tsunadre-strike on the tsunadre.

    One of Maid Quests finest moments, in fact.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:18 No.10083337
    dancingbird.gif
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)01:18 No.10083340
    >>10083277

    You take a step back as the two demons go nose to nose with each other, glaring at each other's eyes.

    "I SHOULD GO FIRST," snarls SHANTAK. "IT WAS I WHO WAS LEFT NAKED WITH THREE PITCHFORKS IN MY ASS AT THE SUCCUBUS BALL AFTER THIS BITCH DECIDED TO SPIKE MY GOBLET OF BLOOD WITH ROOFIES!"

    "NO, IT IS I WHO SUFFERED THE GREATER HUMILIATION!" howls HOGO. "FOR SHE IS THE ONE WHO SPREAD THE RUMOR AMONGST THE LILITU THAT MY PENIS IS THE SIZE OF A SINGLE PEANUT!"

    "THEN WE SHALL DECIDE BY WHO HAS THE LARGER DONG!" SHANTAK declares. "DROP YOUR PANTS AND REVEAL WHAT YOU HAVE TO OFFER!"

    "FUCK YOU, YOU FAGGOT! WHY DO YOU WANT TO SEE MY COCK FOR, YOU HOMO!" HOGO protests.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:19 No.10083355
    RAMIREZ CLOSE THE GATE WITH YOUR MAGIC
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:19 No.10083360
    >>10083340
    ... I think I just gained a new level of respect for Alicia.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:19 No.10083364
    >>10083340

    While they bitch, shall we send for Carmine...? Nah, she won't hold back. Let's wait until they actually start shit.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:20 No.10083379
    >>10083360

    She probably knows the size of that demon's dong from firsthand experience.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:21 No.10083383
    >>10083364
    Patience table-humper. We must wait until the demons have come to blows before we re-enter combat.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:21 No.10083390
    >>10083340
    This is either going to get very violent, or very gay. Maybe both.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:21 No.10083397
    To Alicia just be like, "I approve." while attempting to hold your laughter.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:22 No.10083404
    Are demons going to show their honor?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:22 No.10083408
    >>10083379
    If so, sounds like it would have been humiliating and non-consensual for him, and amusing for her.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:22 No.10083413
    >>10083390
    Violently gay?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:22 No.10083417
    >>10083340
    Give Alicia a quick grin of approval.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:22 No.10083420
    >>10083390
    If one of the demons tries to anally rape the other, that will be a great opening for attack.

    You know, just in case.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:23 No.10083428
         File1274937782.jpg-(154 KB, 302x585, 1272174016156.jpg)
    154 KB
    >port and crackers at hand

    >demons getting the shit trolled out of them

    >comparing demon dicks

    Life is grand. I mean, I even had Ritz crackers and colby jack in the fridge to go with the Port. Hell yes.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)01:23 No.10083445
    >>10083308

    "Reginald?" you whisper to your butler.

    "Yes, young master?" Reginald says.

    "Fetch the Bren Gun. . . also the others. Tell them to come armed," you say. Taking a cigar from the humidor on your desk, you light up and take a deep drag, grinning as you watch the two demons continue to argue.

    "I KNOW WHY YOU DON'T WANT TO SHOW YOUR COCK," SHANTAK roars. "IT'S BECAUSE IT'S TINY, ISN'T IT? I BET THAT'S WHY LADY ASMODAY SPREAD THOSE RUMORS, BECAUSE YOUR COCK'S SMALLER THAN HER CLIT."

    "FUCK YOU, AT LEAST I DIDN'T WIND UP WITH FARM IMPLEMENTS IN MY POOPER IN FRONT OF EVERY HOT BABE IN HELL!" HOGO howls. "WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING, ANYWAY, TRYING TO SLIP ROOFIES IN HER DRINK? IT'S A TASTE OF YOUR OWN DAMN MEDICINE, IS WHAT IT IS!"

    > Cunning roll: 9
    > SHANTAK: 3
    > HOGO: 16

    "FUCK YOU, NO ONE DESERVES THAT! I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!" SHANTAK screams.

    "WAIT! THAT'S WHAT THAT FUCKER WANTS US TO--" HOGO realizes, too late. . .

    > SHANTAK ATTACKS: 15
    > HOGO DEFENDS: 12
    > HOGO takes 3 damage as the frost-claws tear into his flesh. . .
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:23 No.10083448
    Use this opportunity to sneak in more firepower, and perhaps have Reginald call in some adjustments on that last fire mission.

    Needs more machinegun and grenade launcher.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:26 No.10083512
    Sneak attack time now?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:26 No.10083515
    Alicia, is the portal closed yet?

    "Guys, don't worry, you totally have all the time in... well until the others arrive and try to one up you..."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:27 No.10083527
    >>10083448
    we should still have mini grenade rounds for our shotgun
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:27 No.10083528
         File1274938039.jpg-(34 KB, 350x370, dramatic removal.jpg)
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    >>10083448

    "Reginald, you think Kyomi could hold up one end of an M2 Browning and Khristopher, the other?"
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)01:29 No.10083566
         File1274938153.jpg-(73 KB, 422x500, No_1859.jpg)
    73 KB
    >>10083448
    >>10083420
    >>10083417
    >>10083413
    >>10083397

    You give Alicia a sly smirk as HOGO and SHANTAK start beating each other up. "See?" you say. "I told you to trust. . ."

    "BAKA!" comes a high-pitched, feminine cry. There is the sound of two sudden THWAP THWAPS, and both demons wind up sitting on the ground rubbing their heads.

    Standing in the portal now is a tall, sexy looking succubus babe holding a nail-bat. "IDIOTS!" the woman shouts at them. "Letting a human convince you to start infighting! Men are such idiots!"

    "Who the hell is. . ." you wonder. . . and then the newcomer turns to you and smiles, bowing deeply.

    "Pleased to meet you," she says. "My name is Lady Nerissa. And that bitch over there fucked my boyfriend." She points at Alicia.

    > LADY NERISSA, demoness of NAILBATS, arrives.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:29 No.10083573
    >>10083528
    I think we should keep those two as far away from combat as possible.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:30 No.10083600
    >>10083566
    "Madam, 'that bitch' is my maid, and I shall not allow such remarks be directed towards her in my presence. I demand an apology."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:31 No.10083606
    >>10083566
    "Your boyfriend clearly has poor taste in women."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:31 No.10083610
    >>10083600
    I was going to make a suggestion, but this is a much better idea.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:31 No.10083615
    close the fucking portal already. Or let's get that trait going?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:31 No.10083618
    >>10083566
    >And that bitch over there fucked my boyfriend

    "If you want to get revenge for that, you'll have to get in a really long line."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:31 No.10083628
    >>10083566

    Aww fuck!

    "Is your boyfriend really worth all this effort?"
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:32 No.10083640
    >>10083566
    >BAKA!
    >Lady Nerissa

    Is it odd that I simultaneously want to RAGE her to death and lube her ass with a stick of butter before savagely pounding it?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:32 No.10083644
    >>10083618
    I hope that by line we mean our dick
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:32 No.10083646
    >>10083606
    Liking this one, actually.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)01:32 No.10083650
    >>10083600

    "An apology? That's rich," Lady Nerissa says. She stalks past the two cowering male demons and walks right up to you, putting her face right up to yours. "And what do you think that you can do, little human, against a Queen of Hell? I could snuff your life out like a candle, if I wanted, but since you amuse me, I've decided to spare your life for now. All I want is her," she says, pointing to Alicia. "Give her to me, and I'll let you live."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:34 No.10083673
    >>10083650
    "No."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:34 No.10083676
    >>10083650

    "Nothing doing. I still have to take her to Disney Land. As a proper gentleman, it wouldn't do for me to break my promises, no matter the origin of the lady."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:34 No.10083677
    >>10083650
    "Go to Hell."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:34 No.10083685
    >>10083650
    >And what do you think that you can do, little human, against a Queen of Hell?

    "I already brought down one, I can do it again."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:35 No.10083699
    >>10083685
    Fucking this. Just point at Alicia, depowered and in a maid uniform, and smirk.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:35 No.10083710
    "Fucked your boyfriend? You're demons, and what was he doing in the succubus party anyway? I mean everyone knows what happens there. How does he even has the courage to go visit another Hell Mafia Princess?"
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:35 No.10083713
         File1274938552.jpg-(32 KB, 750x600, 1271046167856.jpg)
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    >>10083677
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:36 No.10083716
    >>10083685
    "In fact I'm going for the record. Not sure what the current one is, but I think two is a good starting point."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:36 No.10083718
    "Going by my track record, beat you up, and make you a maid."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:36 No.10083719
    >>10083600
    This. And it would be great to punctuate it by blasting her with some magic. Notthatourmagicalbloodlineshouldtakeeffectnoworanything.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:36 No.10083726
    >>10083650
    "Mmm... nah."
    Then pinch her tits.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:36 No.10083727
    >>10083566

    "If he was lured away from you, you can obviously do better."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:37 No.10083743
    troll the demoness?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:37 No.10083745
    >>10083699

    DO EET!

    Also say: >>10083710
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)01:38 No.10083770
    >>10083685
    >>10083677
    >>10083676
    >>10083673

    "Given that Memorial Day is coming up. . . I think I'll go for the historical reference and just say, "NUTS." "

    "Nuts?"

    "It means "Go to Hell," you say. "I've already taken down one Queen of Hell. What makes you think I can't take you down too?"

    "A queen? Don't make me laugh. Queen of a tiny domain, a little podunk tower in the corner of jigoku," Lady Nerissa scoffs. "I think you will find me more. . . difficult prey."

    >>10083448

    "Young Master?" Reginald says, walking back into the room. "I hate to interrupt, but I have a message."

    "And that is?" you ask.

    "Incoming," Reginald says.

    A moment later, a 60mm mortar shell hits Nerissa in the chest and hurls her back into the portal before making her explode.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:38 No.10083778
    >>10083650
    It's tempting to say we be an ass & kiss her.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:39 No.10083788
    "I've got a uniform just about your size, bitch."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:39 No.10083798
         File1274938796.jpg-(8 KB, 251x247, fuck_yeah.jpg)
    8 KB
    >>10083770
    Great shot, Sam.

    Waltz up to the remaining two demons and say, quietly:

    "Now... fuck off."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:40 No.10083800
    >>10083770
    Ha ha, that works.
    Getting bored, Gashujin?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:40 No.10083808
    >>10083770

    "Au revoir, Nerissa!"

    And then we blow her a kiss while we close the portal. Because fuck this noise.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:40 No.10083811
    >>10083770
    Fucking owned, though how did we not get some sort of splash damage from impact, 60mm rounds ain't nothing to laugh at, especially considering she was standing right in front of us
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:40 No.10083816
    "Really guys, unless you hurry up there are only going to be more interruptions with your vengeance. I'm all for letting the early bird catch the worm but this party may get too crowded"
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:40 No.10083818
    Use your new magic to make the nailbat catch flame and melt the ice demon. Then bind Nerissa
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:40 No.10083820
    >>10083770
    "Now then, are you two going to follow her back out, or do you also need to be... shown the door?"
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:41 No.10083831
    >>10083798

    This sounds good.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:41 No.10083834
    >>10083811
    It didn't blow until it went through the portal.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:42 No.10083861
    Shout through the portal: "That was actually much easier!"
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:43 No.10083865
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    77 KB
    >A moment later, a 60mm mortar shell hits Nerissa in the chest and hurls her back into the portal before making her explode.

    "And into the realm of fire..."
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)01:43 No.10083871
    >>10083798

    As the two demons look, agape, at Nerissa's smouldering wreckage of a corpse, you walk up to the two of them and put your foot up on the collapsed table.

    "And she's got a bead right on you two as well," you say. "So fuck off."

    > Cunning: 9
    > SHANTAK: 15
    > HOGO: 24

    The two demons look at each other, then back at you, then smirk. "IT'LL TAKE HER A MOMENT TO RE-AIM," HOGO says.

    "YOUNG MASTER!" Reginald shouts. "LOOK OU--"

    > Your Defense Roll: 8
    > SHANTAK's attack: 6
    > HOGO's attack: 24

    You fall to the ground with a rather large gash in your stomach as HOGO's claws rip into your gut.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:43 No.10083875
    >>10083770
    >A moment later, a 60mm mortar shell hits Nerissa in the chest and hurls her back into the portal before making her explode.
    Slip on a pair of bitchin' shades.

    "2 for 2. Not bad."

    THEN we blast those 2 demons with whatever magic we can drudge up. And Alicia goes back to portal closing.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:43 No.10083877
         File1274939017.jpg-(69 KB, 405x276, 1243668654473.jpg)
    69 KB
    "... she plunges."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:43 No.10083878
    BECOME EXALTED

    KEEP TROLLING DEMONS
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:43 No.10083885
         File1274939031.jpg-(190 KB, 800x800, MaidMecha.jpg)
    190 KB
    Completely unrelated thing here. Just a picture that Goshujin can use later if he finds it necessary.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:44 No.10083886
    >>10083871
    Laaaame.

    Open fire.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:44 No.10083889
         File1274939053.jpg-(122 KB, 1600x1200, YEEEAAH.jpg)
    122 KB
    >>10083877
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:44 No.10083899
         File1274939082.png-(25 KB, 244x246, YEEEEEAAAAAHHHHH.png)
    25 KB
    >>10083877
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:45 No.10083907
    >>10083871

    FIRE GUNS!
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:45 No.10083910
         File1274939122.jpg-(11 KB, 200x150, 1264813871919.jpg)
    11 KB
    >>10083800

    >implying that Goshujin didn't pull an epic LOL just now.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:45 No.10083916
    We kinda need that magical hax NAO
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:45 No.10083918
    >>10083871
    Being badass, we no-sell that shit, get right up, and punch the demon square in the face.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:45 No.10083919
    >>10083871
    "It's only a flesh wound."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:45 No.10083924
    >>10083871
    Fuck, cast shield on our self, proceed to fall back while holding our torn guts.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)01:45 No.10083927
    >>10083886

    > Reginald's First Attack: 6
    > HOGO's Defense: 16
    > SHANTAK's Defense: 12

    . . . Reginald raises his gun, but hesitates. He doesn't have a shot. . .

    HOGO grabs you by the throat and lifts you to your feet, putting razor-sharp talons to your neck. "BACK OFF," he growls. "ONE FALSE MOVE AND HE DIES."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:46 No.10083939
    >>10083927
    spit in his face
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:47 No.10083945
    >>10083927

    We need some magic right fucking now, man.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:47 No.10083954
    >>10083927
    Magic missile him in the fucking eye
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:47 No.10083961
    >>10083927
    Well, that magic would be really convinient like RIGHT FUCKING NOW!
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:48 No.10083962
    >>10083927

    SILENT SPELL IN 3... 2... 1...
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:48 No.10083967
    >>10083927
    He's fire.
    Take a nice, long piss on his leg.
    That should do some damage.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:48 No.10083974
    >>10083927
    So... Time for the Bloodline to trigger and for us to go Dragonblooded on their asses?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:49 No.10083979
    >>10083927
    >ONE FALSE MOVE AND HE DIES.
    Been there, done that. Duh.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:49 No.10083980
    fuck, gotta sleep

    DON'T DIE ON ME /TG/
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:49 No.10083983
    >no magic missile macros yet

    Also, everybody going HURR MAGEEK is probably convincing the good GM to troll us in his usual awesome fashion. My vote is for assgun feint at the proper time.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:49 No.10083988
    >>10083918
    Nah. Stand up & unload the entirety of our shotgun into his face. Or make with the blasting here. >>10083875
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:50 No.10083997
    >>10083927
    Spit in his eye. It'll freeze where it lands. Ice demon and all.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:50 No.10084007
    >>10083983
    We're gonna get trolled one way or another. Might as well get on with it.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:50 No.10084010
    >>10083997
    Hogo is the fire one dude
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)01:51 No.10084024
    >>10083962
    >>10083961
    >>10083954
    >>10083945
    >>10083939

    "ONE FALSE MOVE AND HE DIES," HOGO says.

    "Fuck you," you sneer, and spit in his face.

    "SUIT YOURSELF," HOGO says. His claw rips out your throat.

    As you fall to the ground, gasping as you choke on your own blood, you see Alicia rise up from the bed screaming your name. You wish you could hear her, but the roaring in your ears is too loud. . .

    As your life starts to fade away, you have to laugh. Last time you died, she wasn't so upset, you reflect, as HOGO and SHANTAK rush towards Reginald and Alicia, Reginald raising his Bren gun in a last-ditch attempt, as a new flood of demons rushes in through the gate. . .

    -----
    YOU ARE DEAD

    CONTINUE? Y/N
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:51 No.10084025
    I'd say kick him in the nuts, but it's probably too small a target.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:52 No.10084039
    >>10084024
    Y
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:52 No.10084042
    >>10084024

    >magic powers

    >in hell

    FUND IT
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:52 No.10084045
    >>10084024

    Y. Where do we end up after death?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:52 No.10084046
    Y

    Don't do stupid shit.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:52 No.10084047
    >>10084024
    Well... Goshujin did warn us at the end of the last thread so I kinda expected this.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:52 No.10084051
    >>10084024
    CONTINUE? Y
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:52 No.10084057
    >>10084024
    Seriously?

    Fuck You.

    We never even got that Bloodline.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:52 No.10084060
    >>10084024
    Damn straight continue, death only seems to make us more badass, and net maids
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:53 No.10084061
    >>10084024
    Y
    Continue
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:53 No.10084062
         File1274939585.jpg-(149 KB, 638x825, i cast maggot missile.jpg)
    149 KB
    >>10083983
    This is the closest I have.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:53 No.10084063
    >>10084057
    Baaaaw, don't do stupid shit then.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:53 No.10084068
    >>10084024
    That's... a little more trolling than we needed. Umm, continue/restart with our TRUE MAGIC POWERS ACTIVATION as a convenient save-our-ass plot device.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:53 No.10084071
    >>10084057
    that could be how we CONTINUE
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:54 No.10084082
    >dies
    >goes to hell, again
    >ends up 5 feet from the other end of the portal
    >jumps back out
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:54 No.10084087
    >>10084024
    >you see Alicia rise up from the bed screaming your name.

    ... What IS our name, anyway?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:54 No.10084089
         File1274939679.png-(10 KB, 284x276, 1262945016482.png)
    10 KB
    >>10084024

    shit can only get insane-er from here on out. And the fucking door is already open.

    Actually... now we can attack them from behi-

    CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:55 No.10084098
    >>10084024

    Y

    Haha, our continued refusal to stay dead starts to go up into Dark Schneider tterritory.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:55 No.10084105
         File1274939738.jpg-(215 KB, 550x600, 1253489961452.jpg)
    215 KB
    >>10084087

    TIBERIUS MCAWESOME
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:55 No.10084111
    >>10084089
    Remember that demoness we completely pwned? Nerissa? Let's enslave- I mean, hire her on the way out.

    As is befitting of our tradition of bringing maids with us when we leave Hell.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:55 No.10084112
    >>10084087

    ...Goddamnit.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)01:56 No.10084116
    >>10084024
    >>10084051
    >>10084046
    >>10084045
    >>10084039

    > Y

    You wake up and find yourself in a dungeon cell in hell. You are naked, and you are chained to a wall as a river of brimstone and magma flows past the barred window. It's all very familiar, and actually rather comforting.

    There is the sound of heavy footsteps, and the jingling of chains. A monstrously fat, six-armed demon stalks down the stairs towards you, grinning. "Brought you a friend," he says.

    He opens up the cell door and tosses something in. It's Alicia. She's beaten up pretty bad, it seems: there are a bunch of bruises all over her body, and she's got dried blood all over her. The jailer laughs as he walks away, slamming the dungeon door behind him, leaving you two alone.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:56 No.10084120
    >>10084098
    we have a revolving door after life
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:56 No.10084123
    >>10084057
    You obviously don't GET this quest & need to leave.

    >>10084024
    >CONTINUE? Y/N
    >Y
    OBVIOUSLY.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:57 No.10084134
    >>10084116

    "Well that was something."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:57 No.10084136
    >>10084116
    See if we still have our good ol' ass canon.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:57 No.10084137
    >>10084116
    "Well, that didn't go as planned."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:57 No.10084139
    >>10084116
    We already know what to do in this situation. Masturbate!
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:57 No.10084152
    >>10084116
    "Well that could have worked out better."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:58 No.10084160
    has our mage blood line activated yet?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:58 No.10084165
    >>10084116
    "Well, that could have gone better. Was a close thing, though. How're you holding up?"
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)01:58 No.10084175
    >>10084139
    You attempt to masturbate, but your hands are chained to the wall and you can't reach your dick. This bothers you more than it should.

    Alicia stirs and slowly pulls herself up to her knees. She shakes her head and groans. "Hey. . . idiot," she sighs. "Are you alive? . . . relatively speaking?"
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:59 No.10084183
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    >>10084116

    >implying Reginald sold her out to get the demons out of the house

    Good man; otherwise we might not have held them off with ANY amount of firepower.

    And now... for the trollface.

    It occurs to me that the GM might be getting tired of this quest. And that he's getting drunker as the night goes on. And night-time /tg/ is now filtering in, in strength.

    In short, shit is about to get extremely amusing.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:59 No.10084194
    >>10084175
    "Yeah, if suffering from a raging stiffie at the moment. Mind helping me with these chains?"
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:59 No.10084198
    >>10084116
    See if she's conscious & find out how bad off she is along with what happened after we died.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:59 No.10084199
    >leaving you two alone.

    Bow-chicka bow-wow...

    Too soon?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)01:59 No.10084201
    >>10084175
    "Enough. I'd be better if you were in good enough condition to rescue me, though."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:00 No.10084215
    "Not really, but when has that ever stopped me?"
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)02:00 No.10084217
    >>10084165
    >>10084152
    >>10084137

    "I could be better. That. . . didn't go as planned. How are you holding up?" you ask.

    "Well, did I ever mention to you that I got my cherry back when I turned into. . . this?" Alicia asks, slowly getting up to her feet, pulling herself up using the prison door bars.

    "I don't think so."

    "Well, it's a moot point, now," Alicia says, offhandedly. You notice that some of the blood, by the way, is between her legs. "You know," she says, a mad smile on her lips, "That fucker HOGO seemed a lot smaller when I was. . . bigger. . ."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:00 No.10084218
    >>10084175
    "Apparently. Frankly, I'm astonished they didn't just grab and pocket my soul... must have some sort of plan. Any speculation?"
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:01 No.10084223
    >>10084175

    "Fuck me, what about Reggie and all the maids? Are they okay?"
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:01 No.10084227
    >>10084194
    Second
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:01 No.10084235
    >>10084175
    "Well, my last stand was far less manly than I hoped it would be."
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:01 No.10084236
    >>10084116
    Ask Alicia what happened after we got cut up like a bitch, then see how well those chains are holding us to the wall
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)02:01 No.10084239
    Are we autosaging?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:02 No.10084246
    >>10084217
    A status report on the mansion and everyone would be handy.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:02 No.10084249
    >>10084217

    >"Well, it's a moot point, now," Alicia says, offhandedly.

    This fills me with rage and shame that we failed to save her from such violations....

    ... on the other hand, the contents of my /d/ folder say that I'm a fucking hypocrite.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:02 No.10084251
    >>10084239
    yes
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:02 No.10084252
    >>10084217
    Regret that we weren't the one who got to pop it.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:02 No.10084256
    >>10084217

    Well that sucks. Too bad I was too busy dying to see it. It would've been a sight.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:02 No.10084259
    >>10084239
    Yarp
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:03 No.10084268
    >>10084217
    >Well, it's a moot point, now,
    We're assraping that that demon so hard with a rake when we get out of here.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:03 No.10084271
    >>10084217
    So we owe Hugo his own dick in a box, preferably dis-attached from his body...

    Ask her if the maids and Reginald made it out in one piece, hopefully minus their own demonic rape scenes
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:03 No.10084276
    lets try to magic the chains apart.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 05/27/10(Thu)02:04 No.10084289
    >>10084278

    Someone archive this one, please.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:04 No.10084297
    >>10084217
    "I'm sorry, Alicia. My plan failed. *sigh* They do that far too often. And you paid for it... though I suppose I did as well. Any ideas as to our first move for getting out of here?"
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:04 No.10084300
    >>10084217
    Well that's a bit of a downer.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:05 No.10084309
    >>10084276
    We might still need the robe to do magic, since it is what allowed us the ability to use ritual magic, we may have innate ability, but the robe gave us a way to draw it out, no robe, no magiks
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:05 No.10084310
    >>10084217
    Now that's just not fair Goshu, we had dibs on her second virginity.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:05 No.10084312
    ...Actually, correct me if I'm wrong, but now that we're just a soul, we're pretty much immune to what the demons can do to us, what with ancient blood pacts of our ancestors, right?
    Also, after some time finding out how bad off she is, rail against hell and vow to make them pay, ranting more and more until we glow and burst from the demon shackles using our unknown magic. Don't stop to think about doing so and rush off, Alicia in arms.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:06 No.10084338
    >>10084217

    "Fuck. They'll pay for that. Did any of the others make it out alive?"
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:07 No.10084348
    >>10084312
    We only had that pack with Asmoday/Alicia, not with any other demon
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:10 No.10084406
    Goddamit, why didn't we get a magic powered retcon? This is sucking hard.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:12 No.10084445
    I'm going to make a little rhyme here, so everyone remembers what happened the last time we were in this situation, "Trips to hell, can end well"
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:15 No.10084475
    >>10084406

    Blame the idiot who thought it'd be a good idea to saunter up to two demons. We should have taken cover and used their shock to put round after round of STEHL RAIN into them.

    As it is, it's time for the escape scene, so we should test our bonds, maybe see if we can get Alicia out first.

    If the demons left our other companions alone, we are about to have a righteously enraged and sexually-frustrated Paladin and some other friends bring the smitings back into Hell.
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:15 No.10084480
    Not to bitch, since I've seen the average stats for demons in the guide, but didn't those two get bullshittingly competent all of a sudden?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:38 No.10084903
    are we autosaging?
    >> Anonymous 05/27/10(Thu)02:44 No.10084999
    we could be autosaging



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