Posting mode: Reply
Password(Password used for file deletion)
  • Supported file types are: GIF, JPG, PNG
  • Maximum file size allowed is 3072 KB.
  • Images greater than 250x250 pixels will be thumbnailed.
  • Read the rules and FAQ before posting.
  • ????????? - ??

  • File : 1277252314.gif-(43 KB, 350x517, Stopfaggotry.gif)
    43 KB Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:18 No.10674975  
    Soo, freeform rpg forums. You all know those putrid pieces of shit. Hell, many have probably tried it (it's ok, we all have dark secrets). And They're a prime source, next to Deviantart, for furious rage about fucking retarded Mary Sues.

    So, let's dig some shit up. Give us your most horrible experiences, either as a player or as an onlooker. The bad, the ugly and the retarded, it's all good here.

    Picture might be related.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:19 No.10675009
    not OP, bump for mild interest
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:21 No.10675028
    Character takes another player's trap character below deck, raping it for the entire boat ride.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:21 No.10675038
    >Have a looksee at some rpg forum your idiot friend said was SUPER MEGA AWSUM
    >Realize it's about magic wolves. Facepalm
    >Read something due to morbid curiosity
    >Realize it's about magic wolves fucking other magic wolves in the ass. Often being pedo rapists
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:26 No.10675113
    It was basically like this: the game looked intresting and seemed really coherant. Everything was well thought out and all the players seemed to be really intrested in building a story. So I joined.
    After my first written turn (after jumping through every fucking hurdle and loop the fucking totalitarian character creation form had and doing it again since the admin didn't think it was realistic for a dog to permanently mangle a trained warrior's face) I get a private message from the site admin.

    Basically, it was like this: "So I notice you joined. Good, here's how the things will go from here: your character will go here and do this, and think this about it. Then he will go here, and be killed by this dude."
    Turns out it looked coherant and cooperative because the fucking GM was actually just making other people write his fucking book.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:26 No.10675115
    As fluff i made up some ultra evil creature that my character fought. Just backround stuff, it'd never pop up in game.

    But aparently i described them a bit too awesome because sure enough another player made and played as one.

    The thing is, the fluff for these monsters is that they are evil to the core. In order to become one you need to torture, murder, rape, and sacrifice hundreds of people (How you rape/torture/murder/sacrifice makes the power appear in different mutations. metal skin, claws, laser eyes ect). This guys OTHER character (super mary sue of course) finds one and CONVINCES IT TO BE GOOD. It is now his new character. I tried to explain how fucking impossible this is but he wouldn't hear it.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:30 No.10675186
    The majority of people on freeform RP sites are a bunch of stupid faggot 14 year old boys playing ZOMGF UBAR HAWT LEZBEAN SEXX0RZ BICTHES who are gods or some shit.

    Sturgeon's Law, dude. 90% of everything is shit.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:31 No.10675202
    Alright. One of my favorite rp experiences of my rich career was a freeform supers game. It was set up by a friend's cousin and his friends. So it was the cousin, two or three of his friends, my friend and me. And it was awesome, mostly because we planned out how the stories would go and who would win the fights beforehand.

    The problem was with the character made by one of the cousin's friends. He was some kind of electricity based guy. Anti-hero type. Like his player he was gay (and the player also made another gay character for Character A to hook up with.) So not only is he a badass anti-hero, he's also super intelligent (he designed all his equipment) and incredibly wealthy (he had a batman-esque secret lab). All that would be acceptable if he A) ever lost or suffered a setback or B) could fucking RP. Every time the action was on him (and it was frequently) it was a mess. He had me wincing the whole damn game. Argh.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:33 No.10675236

    I made a worst characters you saw thread a while back

    The most horrible thing there was an admin who made a character that basically gained the powers of all the other characters in the forum. So if someone joined that very day with their super special touhou-tier sue, she had their powers as well.

    Yeah. Beat that.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:34 No.10675247

    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:35 No.10675278
    Admins butting into games and telling how much they suck. Especially if the players are firsttimers just trying things out.

    Also one asshole who had a hardon for the Joker from batman, as well as Hellsing, and played like a fuckfaced psychopath. Godmoded the fuck out of everything, basically to the point nobody even tried to oppose him because his characters could casually take fireballs to face and walk it off without even caring. And god forbid if he got to actually be a gamemaster. It always went like this: "Characters enter. Suddenly fifty billion fireballs go off as some SUPER SEEKRIT organization attacks the place and kills everyone with (literal and seriously) machine guns while nothing even hinders them in any way. Run motherfuckers run."
    Also he thought he was being really clever when he ensured his godmodding by shit like "Attacks high, but if the character dodges actually just feints and attacks low. If blocked, does bullshit that negates it". And he liked to tell others how much they sucked by masking it as his character's thoughts.

    Also, a whiny bitch who would argue about everything and was all too happy to inform others their concepts had flaws (despite playing a fucking race of DEMON-VAMPIRE-DRAGON-DEMONHUNTERS WITH MODERN WEAPONS IN MEDIEVAL FANTASY WITH A DWARVEN SLAVE RACE WHOSE AIRSHIPS COULD CONQUER A CONTINENT WITHOUT ANY PROBLEMS. EACH OF THEM).

    We solved the problem by ignoring him and his games. He left after nobody would even talk to him. And believe me, he knew what was wrong.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:36 No.10675293
    I usualy play the roll of humans in my RPs because everyone else is a half angel/demon/dragon/god. Ironically, the military I play as hasn't lost a man yet but has protected several cities due to the fact no one considers them a threat so they never attack them but they lay down enough flack to drive them off (under the guise of "I WASN'T REALLY DESTROYING THE CITY, BOY AM I EVIL AND CRAFTY!")
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:38 No.10675320
    WoW. I was a part of WoW RP servers.
    Such faggotry as:
    Paladin that falls from grace every damned week because she cybers with death knights all the time, all of which have a corruption fetish. Paladiness constantly mopes around being depressing.
    Any attempt at character development is seen as a "retcon". Especially if you age your character. Hooly fuck look out.

    Any attempt at advancing a plot is seen as trying to take over Blizzard's lore. Even if this plot has NOTHING to do with the lore, and is entirely personal.

    Using any part of Azeroth that isn't your local populated city is seen as "hiding" from the community, and everyone whom hates you (And people hate you) will go to seek you out, in your moment of privacy.

    No action, no fun, any type of combat RP is seen as godmodding. A friend of mine and I were roleplaying combat, both consenting to the end result(Which was my loss) and were working to it. The both of us were called godmodders, because of exaclty how we fucking typed. In other words, instead of typing "John swings at Joe", which is alot harder to make look cool than "John swings a wide arc at Joe's belly, clashing against the armor with a bright spark and a sonorous clap of steel to steel."

    Even after we had informed the people that we were working toward the same end, which was agreed upon before the combat ever happened, we were called trolls and godmodders. We were essentially putting on a show for these people, a roleplayed combat fight with no drama between us two, and WE got called godmodders by OUTSIDE motherfuckers.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:39 No.10675339

    Oh, and the guy actually admitted he scanned each and every character in the whole goddamn forum and made sure his characters were the strongest. And thought there was nothing wrong with that.
    Also thought that putting a "(YOUR CHARACTER MAY DIE IN THIS GAME, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED)" disclaimer up meant he could autohit and godmode as much as he wanted.
    Also had some weird fetish for blood and killing.

    The place's admin was pretty damn meek "let's all be friends" -type of a gal who didn't want to have any confrontations with anyone. So that's why we had to put up with his bullshit for as long as we did.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:40 No.10675361
    Was there, saw, enjoyed.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:41 No.10675369
    I liked the old town guard dude too
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:41 No.10675380
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:43 No.10675403
    Oh, and cybersex/relationship roleplay abound. Fucking everywhere. Because it's the only type of roleplay allowed by the community.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:43 No.10675408
    If any fa/tg/uys feel like messing with some of these boards, here's some inspiration.

    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:44 No.10675419
    When I met my first girlfriend, one of the first things she said was more or less "let me tell you about my character!"
    I kinda zoned out and nodded every now and then as I listened to the soap-operaish drivel her and her friends had been writing for the previous three years while I tried to chat up her hot Latina friend (whom I, having met before I encountered 4chan and embraced my inner ephebophile, gave up on when I learned she was merely 12).

    Is it any wonder that I, after getting to know this girl and began to like her enough to start dating her, found out she was halfway to batshit Crazy Land and was a slut to boot?
    Why are there no good ca/tg/irls, brethren?
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:44 No.10675420
    I remember trying out a Sonic RP forum once, where Robotnik unleashed a Virus that fucked over pretty much all of technology. Despite my avoidance for Sonic RP's this one seemed promising in that it was sort of based around gang warfare.

    Most of the character I saw seemed rather realistic (For a Sonic RP) so I thought
    "Maybe this will be different?" and made a character.

    Shortly after that some bitch came in with a some moon goddess werewolf thing or something and that instantly killed all hope I had for the game.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:44 No.10675427
         File1277253879.jpg-(91 KB, 640x480, Mio Vader.jpg)
    91 KB
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:45 No.10675435

    IIRC, one of his games had no less than three SUPER SEEKRIT organizations doing BIG AND SCARY magical experiments within a fucking three kilometer radius. Everything from a JUGGERNAUT, BITCH hugeguts killerknight (who took a stone-melting fireblast straight to face and was mildly inconvenienced) monitored by some fucktard to I'M SAD savant necromancer raising an army of the dead (which didn't fall even if hacked to pieces) while being monitored by some other fucktard to some demon hunter who basically went all Tunguska Blast Even when angered.

    That demon hunter was also one of his characters. One he apparently thought was Indiana Jones -level of dastardly underdog hero. Despite having a fucking archdemon at his beg and call.

    Dude was fucking retarded.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:48 No.10675478
    I... used to freeform RP all the time.

    I ran a few, but there was one specific time -it was a Kingdom Hearts RP I was helping with, so I suppose that explains it- where I ended up having to make a rule of essentially "Post more than two goddamn words you lazy bastards."

    I warned someone about that. And then kicked them out for a week the next time they broke it.

    That person ended up becoming a fanboy stalker. It was pretty funny.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:48 No.10675485

    >trying out a Sonic RP forum
    >killed all hope I had

    you were asking for it
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:50 No.10675515

    Oh, and still continuing. The admin once wanted to run a big campaign -thingy. It was supposed to be about some treasure that was unearthed and everyone wanted it and there were lots of ways to get there and shit like that.

    So his demonhunters roll in, announce the place impure and decree that they now own everything there. Everyone opposing them was shot (with high-powered sniper rifles from Hellsing). And then the big even (where there's a powerful demon that appears when characters reach the treasure) basically buggers out when the fucktard player argues for five pages with the admin why his character would oneshot the demon and why it can't even flee.

    Fuck I'm happy the dude apparently offed himself.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:52 No.10675549
    My first roleplay character was for some awful freeform forum with no story, just Mary Sue on Mary Sue combat. I was 10. My character was named Daisuke even though he was not Japanese. He looked like me, but with cooler hair, and dressed how I wished I could dress. He was trained as a ninja, until a rogue samurai killed his father, and he devoted his life to tracking the murderer down. (But since there was no plot, he never actually made any progress.) He used a bokken because I was really into Ranma 1/2 at the time and thought that Kuno was awesome for some reason, along with a seemingly limitless supply of kunai and shuriken.

    Daisuke's powers included shooting lasers out of his bokken, summoning lightning, a Ranma 1/2 ripoff move that allowed him to tear the ground up, and some generic shonen power boost that activated whenever he started to lose a fight. I would frequently invent entirely new powers on the fly and explain that he suddenly realized his potential in the heat of the battle.

    I'm sorry /tg/.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:54 No.10675569
    I know, but the setting looked promising enough to give it a try.

    Never again.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:54 No.10675578
    I...I ran one of these once.

    It was a universe "outside time" where reality had broken and everything was this big desert, and different areas had "holes" where stuff fell out from the...other places outside outside time.

    It was an interesting enough universe-tech was stuck somewhere around the 70s-but then I went and forced my character in to lead everyone around by the nose.

    I'm sorry, /tg/. Please forgive, for I have sinned.
    >> Raptor Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:54 No.10675580
    I ought to try that sometime.
    Great read btw.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)20:55 No.10675584

    My first character ever was a evil-turned-good-and-really-fucking-angsty half-demon who shot fire from his hands and had three meters long katana. He also had a magic cloak that was his personal hammerspace where he had giant axes and shit like that.

    We've all been there, dude.
    >> The Boss 06/22/10(Tue)20:57 No.10675629
         File1277254668.jpg-(126 KB, 750x563, 1276973038067.jpg)
    126 KB
    We forgive you, brother. *pats you on the back*
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)21:03 No.10675746
    bump for more horror stories
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)21:10 No.10675918
         File1277255436.gif-(2 KB, 100x110, HydrixNoSand.gif)
    2 KB
    I had a decent rage thread about a month ago about a pokemon RP that was run by a god-awful GM. Here is a quick summary of what went wrong.

    * GMPC
    * GM's best friend IRL PC, who had a horrible Mary Sue character. One of his pokemon is a three-headed onix that is power level 5. More on this later.
    * A scale of 1-3 was used to grade a pokemon's power. The GM approved pokemon outside of this range left and right, letting powergaming run rampant.
    * outright said that players would not be allowed to have a team of six pokemon because that would suggest that you were an "Amaxing trainer." The total power level of both the GMPC and GMfriendPC would have permitted a team of six.
    * The GM took a player to task because his description of treating a wound did not exactly match with the GM's imagination exactly.
    * He used a "boss" pokemon, complete with a percentage-based HP bar, but instead of using any publicly viewable formula, he pulled numbers out of his ass. Beforehand, he reacted belligerently when it was suggested that such formulas should be used.
    * The GMPC fought this boss pokemon. He controlled when an attack hit, how much damage it dealt, and if it would freeze or critical.
    * The GMPC described his power level 4 pokemon as being more agile than this boss pokemon, which is supposedly level 10. Before this scene, he claimed that the boss could move at mach speeds with very little acceleration time.
    * As you have probably discovered by now, power level has no logic behind it other than when the GM feels like making a fiat.
    * He declared that bringing a pokemon to 0% HP actually kills it, then would not allow ember to be used to cauterize a wound because that would contradict the pokemon mechanics of ember dealing damage.

    There is more, much, much more, but I've ranted for pages and pages about the laundry list of misdeeds in that RP.
    >> Evil ColSanders !bAnbuTfS9c 06/22/10(Tue)21:11 No.10675937
         File1277255485.jpg-(163 KB, 583x395, 13552_179170127594_14189732759(...).jpg)
    163 KB
    You know... I made OP's macro and I'm disgusted how they fucked the image and slapped their website on it.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)21:11 No.10675944
    I didn't even tell you guys about a year or so later when I made the same character on a Naruto forum, learned a bunch of forbidden techniques, went toe to toe with canon characters who were leagues above me, and roleplayed a romance in the way only a socially awkward middle schooler can. I'm going to need to do some drinking first.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)21:14 No.10676034
    My only encounter with freeform RPG was when a friend of mine that GMd a RP chat room called on me to troll all the half demon/half vampire/half dragon sues.

    The setting was a generic RPG tavern and most of the "mages" were elementals of some sort.

    Enter the Beer Elemental.

    The GM/bartender had been keeping a tally all night on how much the players had been saying they drank. The more alcohol they had in them, the more I could influence their actions. One of the rules was that any attempt to contol another player's character had to go throught the GM. Seeing as I had been brought in by the GM I had free reign to trash their characters such as the half demon vampire warrior mage that kept punching himself in the face because my guy was drunk and thought it was funny.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)21:19 No.10676158
    Don't tease us, goddamn it. We want the whole story.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)21:19 No.10676164
    I'm sorry, I have to go on. There is more that cannot go unsaid.

    * The GM smply set the damage of any attack (Remember, there are no public formulas. He basically says whatever number he feels like saying.) such that his PC's pokemon would barely survive before wiping out legions of enemies.
    * The GMPC could do things that were never explored in the games and never clarified during the setting briefing, such as manufacturing TMs.
    * The GM described shedinja as being as powerful as any other fully evolved or very powerful pokemon because... brace for stupid... "it can still tank a hyper beam and feel nothing"
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)21:27 No.10676332
    Fine then. Here is the entire wound fiasco.

    GM: "Death, just throwing this out there, but I am pretty sure that you just killed Weavile in your last post. As if it weren't an issue being at 1% life, you yanked a rock (that I didn't put there) out of [weavile's wound] and then used Fire (which it is weak to) in order to cauterize the wound. As much as I'd like to just RP as though my last living Pokemon had just died, I feel as though I have to ask you to change your post a bit for the moment."

    player: "Okay, so, perhaps we could do with a short explanation of the % life system then. So far as I recall, in Pokemon, upon reaching 0%, Pokemon lost consciousness. Clearly for the sake of the RP, they also weaken with lowered health, but I seem to have missed the inherent sudden death that ensues upon receiving damage dropping you to 0%.... ...I'll change it, but I would rather not."

    GM: "Oh, I know what the intent of the post was. I just don't think that a Salamence is capable of performing such a thing with Ember. You're also assuming somewhere that I got a gigantic rock stuck in me, which I never posted, so it never really happened."

    >which I never posted, so it never really happened

    This comment annoyed me so much that I attempted to commit account suicide by telling the GM off. He deleted my post and largely ignored it.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)21:29 No.10676375
         File1277256559.jpg-(48 KB, 599x449, Bump2.jpg)
    48 KB
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)21:37 No.10676533
    Get this: I offered to design an entire system catering to the needs of this person on the internet. When I was ignored, I went ahead and put together the skeleton of the system, and offered to be at the beck and call of anybody who wanted me to make a mechanic to represent what they wanted to do. The GM had previously said that he would want a GUI iif he was ever to adopt a system for the RP, so I MADE A CHARACTER BUILDER IN JAVASCRIPT, POSTED THE RESULTING STAT BLOCKS, THEN STARTED MAKING A BOT TO EMULATE COMBAT. My system, statblock, and any offerings of a character builder were completely ignored, so I thought that was the end of it. Cue the GM ripping the few parts out of my system that he apparently liked, then saying absolutely nothing about it.

    Yes, I'm bitter about this situation. I bent over backwards in order to do some work for some random person on the internet, and then he uses some bastardized form of my work without even having the courtesy to tell me that he rejected the system so that I could stop working on the system.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)21:45 No.10676751
         File1277257544.png-(24 KB, 400x400, 1270452682397.png)
    24 KB
    >> /co//v/ert fa/tg/uy 06/22/10(Tue)21:53 No.10676919
    I teamed up with a fellow fa/tg/uy and some friends and we trolled the fuck out of a forum-based freeform called Dark Forest. Our "party" consisted of a female half-owlbear half-dwarf that issued dick-mangling claw-job, a half-zombie narcissist who was constantly pulling himself back together, a Vortigaunt, and a jungle boy who spent most of his time getting high and falling out of trees.

    We posted for less than 48 hours before being banned and attracted the attention of every single moderator and more than half of the site's traffic. Anyone want to hear more?
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)21:54 No.10676944

    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)21:57 No.10677024
    My first character was a Necromancer who traveled from town to town 'practicing' medicine
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)21:59 No.10677054
    >It was a universe "outside time" where reality had broken and everything was this big desert, and different areas had "holes" where stuff fell out from the...other places outside outside time.
    Was this... fuck, I forget the name? But one of the characters was a special effects guy and his paper mache film wall was part of the village defenses?
    >> /co//v/ert fa/tg/uy 06/22/10(Tue)21:59 No.10677067
    The forum had a rule against fast travel, so you had to travel from area to area to area to get anywhere, in our case we wound up traversing a desert location-by-location to get to our goal, the capital city. Each "location" was a different subforum, and you'd create or join an existing thread in such a subforum based on which was appropriate.

    In each of these subforums from the desert to the capital city, we would drop our backpacks, pitch a tent, and drink ourselves into a stupor, all in the funniest way possible. For example, my character, the half-zombie, was hammering the tent stakes into the ground when his arm fell off and got pinned by one of the stakes.

    After a few hours, we got to the city.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)22:01 No.10677105
    >do a freeform RP about female wrestling and lesbo sex
    >have lots of female wrestling and lesbo sex related RPs
    haters gonna hate.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)22:04 No.10677194
    I ran with a couple good ones that devolved into e-drama and Mary Sue faggotry but they weren't too bad.

    Man I was a shit writer though. Least I didn't write Mary Sues.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)22:23 No.10677652
         File1277259817.jpg-(69 KB, 1280x720, CRAWLING IN MY SKIN.jpg)
    69 KB
    I posted this one once a while back. I had just discovered Naruto, a year or two after it started airing, and joined a Naruto RP forum that an internet acquaintance of mine had set up. I didn't realize at the time just what sort of connotations the Naruto fandom had, so I was kind of asking for it, but here's some of the highlights.

    I create my first character, a fairly self-insert Mist Village dude who was very agile but pretty average in all other respects. My first thread, just for kicks, I have him leave Mist Village to go "find himself." Before he can get more than a few miles from the village, he gets randomly attacked by some guy's original Akatsuki leader, an 18-year-old ex-Hokage named Cloud Uchiha, who can throw around Chidori like hotcakes.

    After going back and forth a bit, repeating a pattern of "Cloud charges at my guy with Chidori, my guy ducks out of the way just in time," this dude calls for backup and gets Ace, a 13-year-old genderswap of Gaara who is also in Akatsuki, except they didn't seal her demon because she's too useful to them.

    I had had the foresight to give my guy more than just PEW PEW LAZORZ abilities, so he was eventually able to give them the slip by hiding among the trees and creating an illusion of a raging blizzard to block their vision. They can't have somebody escaping from them, so Cloud decides to make an explosion of that special black fire stuff in a mile radius, except for some reason it doesn't affect the two of them. Out of nowhere, Tsunade shows up and makes a holy shield somehow, which protects my character from the black fire and absorbs all of it.

    I guess the two of them figured they couldn't bullshit their way through a fight with somebody who was actually supposed to be powerful, because after that they ran off.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)22:24 No.10677682
    I used to hang out on MUSH/MUX-type games that featured freeform roleplay, mostly inspired by Marvel Comics or DC Comics, superhero stuff like that.

    After a while, you started noticing particular players that went from game to game, some of which were annoying enough to become mildly infamous. One of "those guys" somehow managed to become an admin on a game.

    He stepped down after September 11, 2001. The reason? He had posted publicly that all the players logging on should roleplay as though the terrorist attack on the World Trade Center had really happened.

    Yeah, he was a dick.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)22:27 No.10677745
    three headed Onyx could actually be a cool evolution, but the guy still sounds like a massive prick
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)22:30 No.10677818

    and the bad part is?
    >> scaredofshadows !!zxfRuuFd4v1 06/22/10(Tue)22:33 No.10677888
    'hit the monster with sticks' as child

    not real fun when you're always monster
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)22:33 No.10677900
    Bamp for more stories.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)22:37 No.10677969
    Actually, I'm a regular poster on a very good Forgotten Realms free-form board.

    Everyone is literate and polite, there is only one Mary Sue on the whole forum and nothing gets sidetracked by fetishism, ever. ERP and general ass-hattery simply do not happen: and the admins aren't heavy handed/half retarded either.

    That said, it's a pretty quiet place in desperate need of some new blood (and a reskin).
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)22:39 No.10678021
    Maybe things would change if only you'd get out of your fursuit.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)22:40 No.10678037
    He's got a point.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)22:43 No.10678080
         File1277260995.jpg-(151 KB, 640x960, naruto look cool.jpg)
    151 KB
    Later, we get introduced to two more godawful characters. The first is another Akatsuki member, also an Uchiha. He was actually the best of the worst, because he was eventually eventually persuaded to start role-playing fairly well and beginning an interesting plotline with one of my characters before disappearing. His worst offenses were his backstory and his Special Original Technique, Do Not Steal, the Fidori, which was a Chidori BUT RED AND NOT LIGHTNING. The backstory was that he had gotten his Mangekyou Sharingan--the one that's only supposed to be obtainable by killing one's best friend--by being fooled into thinking he had killed his best friend.

    Second guy, also an 18-year-old Akatsuki member, was the son of the Fourth Hokage. This was back when all that was known about the Fourth was his nickname, the Yellow Flash, so the guy naturally assumed that his character had inherited his father's "god-like speed," which made his character completely untouchable, able to run 100 miles in about a second, and able to punch craters into the side of a mountain because he had so much momentum. It also somehow meant that he could stop and take a nap in the middle of a battle with no negative repercussions, because obviously his super-speed applied to falling asleep as well.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)22:46 No.10678138
    So he also slept super fast? Hahahaha, that's so horrible. Tell me you have more. I'm starting to feel better about myself.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)22:49 No.10678176

    I gotta say, superspeed sleeping is AWESOME.
    >> scaredofshadows !!zxfRuuFd4v1 06/22/10(Tue)22:49 No.10678186
    not a fucking 'furry', anon

    you should think of new insults
    >> Holt 06/22/10(Tue)22:50 No.10678191

    I second this, for all it's worth.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)22:51 No.10678215
    Did you ever consider that maybe instead of your "One person enters every single one of my threads and insults me repeatedly," theory that you might just be a wholly unlikable person?
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)22:53 No.10678254
         File1277261602.jpg-(100 KB, 450x300, DARKNESS charge.jpg)
    100 KB
    Those four were pretty much the quad-umvirate of bad on that forum. There was another guy, though, who made a big deal out of being a Satan-worshiper and thought he was so edgy and cool because he liked to light Bibles on fire and throw them at cars. His characters tended to look good on paper, metaphorically speaking, but he would then play them as being hyper-competent, able to dodge every attack, etc.

    But between the first four characters, they managed to turn Akatsuki from a somewhat-threatening-if-cliche evil organization into an angst-ridden group of misunderstood teenage prodigies who didn't understand why people kept attacking them.
    >> scaredofshadows !!zxfRuuFd4v1 06/22/10(Tue)22:56 No.10678306
         File1277261800.jpg-(189 KB, 613x868, 947.jpg)
    189 KB
    never carried illusion of being 'likable', anon

    got used to talking to /tg/ers, hard to imagine not having these conversations now
    >> Holt 06/22/10(Tue)22:58 No.10678324

    Hey, you two. Stop derailing the thread. Otherwise I'll have to adress you with a -fag suffix!
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)23:03 No.10678416
    I have an amusing one. Several months ago, many fa/tg/uys joined the Drowtales forum to see if it was possible to roleplay as dwarves there and improve the place. As a result, no characters have been approved since.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)23:05 No.10678461
         File1277262347.png-(450 KB, 812x598, darkness derp.png)
    450 KB
    Oh yeah, and the guy who played Cloud had three other characters who were all exactly the same guy. One was Cloud's good-guy counterpart and brother (or cousin or something), who was based on Zack Fair, and the other two were 14-year-olds, one good, one evil. All of them had the Mangekyou Sharingan. The evil 14-year-old, also an Akatsuki member, was supposedly so powerful that even Cloud was afraid of him, but all he ever did in battles was try to act cutesy and get people to look him in the eye so he could trap them in that super-illusion. Which, surprise surprise, never worked, because that would essentially be an instant-death.

    "Zack" was also the only character who could ever touch Cloud in battle, and only by doing one of those charge-at-each-other-screaming-your-ultimate-ability idiocies, which inevitably ended with both of them collapsed on the ground, evenly matched.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)23:07 No.10678485
    Hahaha, fuckers, the only problems I've ever had with freeform RPing were that they ended prematurely and didn't reach their conclusion.

    Of course there was other faggotry involved on the forum in question (oh god shipping wars) but that part was never a problem.
    >> Alpharius 06/22/10(Tue)23:08 No.10678522

    Oh, yeah. I remember reading the planning phase for that before it was all ruined because too many people tried to join all at once.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)23:10 No.10678552

    How'd that go down? Got any sup/tg/ or 1d4chan links?
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)23:11 No.10678568
    >not a fucking 'furry'
    Do you seriously believe that?
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)23:12 No.10678583
    I had a group of friends who I would freeform RP with, except as the years went by I got sick of them going and plotting their stories out. It got to the point where every action was predetermined, and everyone knew what came next in the story.

    I'd try to play the maverick type, derail their plot, but shiiiit, they'd either get into it early, or take so long I'd lose interest.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)23:14 No.10678613
    How about 'drama queen'? I like that, let's go with that. Nobody in the thread so far attempted to relay anything beyond funny stories from internet forums they had visited. You, alone, chose to bring in autobiographical angst, whether real or fictional.

    Given that you receive only negative attention by your trollplaying, yet continue to do it, I can only assume that you somehow thrive on it. Yeah, 'drama queen' seems pretty appropriate.
    >> Anonymous 06/22/10(Tue)23:29 No.10678849
    where is the moar.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)00:09 No.10679565

    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)01:06 No.10680678
    Imagine a group of the second person.

    And they were all Hellsing vampires or Demons or Dark dragons.

    Also they were 16 year old douchebags.

    Welcome to my hell as a forum moderator.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)01:13 No.10680816
    Nope. At the time, I thought I was being original.

    Highlights of the setting:
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)02:21 No.10681983
    A while back, a friend of mine introduced me to a Bleach RP. I played a Quincy, which, at the time, were not really well thought out.

    But allow me to digress a little. The Process to join the RP was to write up a character concept and back story. I wrote up a Quincy who at a young age had lost his parents to a Hollow and was living with a kindly old man. This man taught him how to be a Quincy and how to control his powers. I submitted it for review, that's when the grammar Nazi-ing started.
    now I'll be the first to admit that I'm not the best at grammar and spelling, but I got to read others who were accepted and had major errors completely overlooked. To make a three week long story of submitting and resubmitting short I finally got in.

    I played my character well I'd like to think. He lived with the old man who had a group of Quincys and meta-humans as associates gathered to protect people from hollows.

    Time passed and plot missions started up (basically the main story for the RP.) So in order to get my character into the missions I had to come up with a hook. I had the old man have connections with someone who told him about the the problem at hand. I was reprimanded by the GM who said that it was realistic for him to have such connections, but it was allowed to happen.

    So groups are given out and I'm with the (soul reaper/hollow combo). I try to get a hold of the guy to start and he's not around. I contact the GM and he said he doesn't know. So it degrades into one big cluster fuck.... Finally the GM decides to take over the group I was in and between him writing his own character and grading his favorites he ignores the rest of us.

    There was plenty of other stuff. Mods not doing their job. GM not doing his job (all of which were specified in the rules.) Etc.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)04:15 No.10683941

    Their forum ground to a halt, basically..
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)04:17 No.10683968
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)04:18 No.10683990
    But why were they so upset about someone playing a Dwarf? There has to be more to it than that. I'm not familiar with Drowtales.
    Second. I don't mind freeform RP if at least a decent number of the people involved aren't idiots. Of course if you post a link on /tg/ that just might change.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)04:24 No.10684057
    Oh god, you're a member of AFW too?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)04:26 No.10684092
    Because in Drowtales, Drow are better than Dwarves at mining and smithing.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)04:28 No.10684119
    For the record:


    Enjoy clawing your eyes out.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)04:30 No.10684141

    I never made a character proposal after seeing the fuckhuge character pile up. I waited a bit, then sent a PM.

    The answer I got was they were working on getting official answers because they were sticklers for canon there, and there was simply not enough information on dwarves. Some of the stuff we cited was declaired out of date for whatever reason. Anyway, some of the discussions brought up by the would be dwarf players revealed some problems with world depth. That went beyond the crappy writing (he had a sprinkling of pretty decent ideas, but like a lot of bad things, it was just not executed well at all.)

    Anyway, last I checked, character reviews are still in limbo and that includes a bunch of long time players' character submissions. A lot of the dwarf players have scattered since. I doubt there're enough of us left to be worth a damn.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)04:30 No.10684154
    So they were mad because someone wanted to play an imperfect character.

    Yeah, I've been there.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)04:34 No.10684197
    *glances at the roster pages*

    Is it just me, or do most of those 'wrestler' pictures not look a damn thing like wrestlers?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)04:48 No.10684384

    I think I remember these two! Colo, aargh!
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)05:11 No.10684696
    Wow, I all of a sudden remembered the worst example of this.

    I like to kick the freeform stereotype and make characters who are fairly useless in a fight but have unique skills. For a One Piece roleplay forum, I decided to make a quick witted conman who had gotten his hands on a Devil Fruit that allowed him to manipulate the written word. I explicitly designed him to be capable of at least trying to defend himself, but helpless against a trained opponent in a direct fight. Not that he would want to get into a direct fight; he was so clever and convincing that I didn't really expect it to happen. Not a bad concept, if I do say so myself.

    The rest of the members didn't think so. I got a lot of insults in the c-box because of my "useless joke" of a character. This was started, perpetuated, and encouraged by one of the admins, who I'll get to later. At first I thought it was just some good natured ribbing at the expense of the new guy, but it went on for days and became gradually more aggressive, even though I would usually just laugh it off or ignore it. I was there to roleplay, not be the forum prom queen.

    I tried to find a crew for my character, since that's really the only way to see anything resembling a story on One Piece forums, but every crew refused, supposedly because they felt that my character wouldn't fit in or wasn't needed. I'm inclined to think it had at least something to do with the admin hating my character, but I don't want to venture into persecution complex territory.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)05:18 No.10684809
    Eventually, another new member invited me to add my character to his crew. He had found one other person to act as a navigator, and the admin had promised to make a new character just for the crew.

    This admin had over ten characters. All of them were female versions of popular male characters. I remember Edward Elric and Sasuke off the top of my head. In theory they were exact duplicates of the originals in terms of personality, history, and powers, with a slightly altered name and a transgender fetish fandrawing in place of a physical description. In practice, they were blatantly self-inserted Mary Sues who all acted like an idealized version of their creator. When confronted about her theft, she would claim that it was a coincidence and she had never heard of the original character.

    The character she created for our crew was Deadpool, basically. Her name was "Wendy Wilson" or something. As you might expect, she used dual katanas along with modern firearms and explosives that don't exist in the setting. Her Devil Fruit ability gave her the knowledge that she was a character in a forum roleplay, which she extended to complete knowledge of the setting and everyone's profile. (Deadpool knows he's in a comic book but doesn't work this to his advantage because that wouldn't really be funny. It's more a side effect of him being insane than a super power.) It also gave her a healing factor, for no logical reason other than that Deadpool has one.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)05:25 No.10684909
    She approved her own profile, and proceeded to brag about it in the cbox. Her sycophants agreed with her enthusiastically when she told us how cool, creative and awesome her character was. I decided to keep my mouth shut.

    The captain makes a thread for the members of the crew to meet. I'm the first one to reply, and make a fairly innocuous introductory post. The admin goes next. She makes a ridiculously long post starting with how attractive and impressive her character is, and how the crowd around her is reacting. Eventually she examines my character, and starts using her power.

    What follows is a bafflingly childish in character description of how my character is useless, boring and stupid, and how whoever designed him must be an idiot to have given him such a useless power and no fighting skills.

    I didn't even bother posting my resignation.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)05:27 No.10684925


    >> Cale !!mpI59fg/DKT 06/23/10(Wed)05:45 No.10685160
    I have participated in and run several free form RPs over the past. Most of mine tend to be at least -based- in some sense of order and constraining laws. I've got a small list of people that I have RP'd with in the past that I always contact when I start up a new one, and they have added some of their friends to the list over time.

    Eh. Sometimes you strike gold and get a plot with a great set of characters, and sometimes you really fucking strike out and get a bunch of shitty, sue'd out characters.

    Either way, it's fun to run them. With good players, it is because the story usually ends up getting pretty damn entertaining. With shitty players, I troll their brains out until they quit.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)05:45 No.10685163
    Oh, this thread is still alive? Guess I'll humor myself a bit then.

    So basically, the game was supposed to be lowish fantasy along the lines of Conan and shit like that. Of course I should have realized that just meant that each and every character was a SPESHUL EXCEPTION who had at least one powerful artifact and shit like that. There were maybe two other people who actually tried to keep it good.

    So I create a character and try to keep it sensible. A young man from a nomad-ish barbarian tribe. He basically left because he felt like his life was being wasted and he wasn't getting anything done. After his friend died a pointless dead by falling from a tree face first into a rock, he decided to get out into the big world and do something that would get him real recognition. Anyhow...

    So after about five games, he finds his way into some old tomb as part of a game, and spots a nice-looking spear. Since nobody actually cared if the characters found magic items, I figured I might as well. I did my very best to not make it an overpowered superweapon. Basically, its powers were along the lines of twisting and coiling like a snake in battle and being able to grow longer or shorter within a limit. It was small time compared to shit like all-cleaving swords and fireball-hurling things.

    So long story short, my character manages to do some clever things with the spear and beats the GM's big bad superman. He gets really butthurt about this and starts bitching about how I "cheated" and godmoded it. When I point out my character was about five times weaker and just lucked out, and that he should chill because nothing permanent happened, his butthurt went critical and he banned me on the spot.

    These are the moments I truly cherish.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)05:49 No.10685220

    That's basically it. When you find some players who share your views of what's a good character and who have about the same philosophy, it really goes great. And when you get some Mary Sue bullshit godmoders, it goes bad fast.
    >> Cale !!mpI59fg/DKT 06/23/10(Wed)05:56 No.10685306
    I will say this, though:

    Doing Freeform RPs prepared me for actually playing big-boy pen&paper games. Why? Because they taught me to think as my character, not as a sheet of stats. If I was playing, I had Machus Veridan, the grizzled old war veteran with a battle axe and neither of his middle fingers. I learned characterization, I learned how to think on my feet (somewhat) as my character.

    Some folks learn it p&p, but having a good freeform community can really help with getting into your character's head.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)05:59 No.10685345
    Nothing new to add really, just wanna see if more people post.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:00 No.10685356

    Funny, for me it was somewhat the other way around. I started with tabletop games, and they taught me about teamwork, about running with the gamemaster's plot and simply not mucking everything up with "MAH CHARACTOR" bullshit.

    Too bad most of the super speshul awsum snowflakes never learn any of that and believe every game is supposed to be about their character's awesome special abilities and about how very incredible and pretty and cool they are.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:03 No.10685393
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:03 No.10685397
    Same here. Also, most of these games tend to devolve into an endless fights between these sues who stubbornly refuse to lose no matter what. Some of the better games I was in had minimal combat and maximum interaction.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:06 No.10685428
    You guys should check out the Square Enix website's RP forum. I never went there myself but a weeaboo I knew serious RPed on there and some of the shit he said made me sad at life.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:06 No.10685434
    They have an even worse "play to win" mentality than most tabletop power gamers. That's less about impressing others with your power, though, and more about wanting to be THE BEST within the little roleplay universe because you can't come close in real life. I know this first hand.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:07 No.10685439
    Don't know anything about freeform forums, but real freeform can be awesome, if you're lucky
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:07 No.10685443

    Ayup. And if there is a fight, the best fights are, I find, actually discussed beforehand. That way, when you've already worked out who's going to win, it's a lot easier to get it done in an entertaining way. Also great for not turning it into a BAWWWfest since the outcome was already agreed upon. I rue that bullshit where Mary Sues try to one-up each other all the time and JUST. WON'T. DIE.

    Of course, a good and surprising fight can be fun too, but only if both players are not faggotry incarnate and can actually realize their character should feel the burn sooner or later.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:08 No.10685454
    It's because they're all unliked or self centered faggots who believe Twilight is a literary epic.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:10 No.10685473
    What about forum RPs with mechanics? Are those game?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:10 No.10685478
    As in freeform in person? Do tell.

    I love going into it with no preconceived ideas of what's going to happen and winning/losing in a way that's clever and satisfying. But that's only actually happened to me once.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:12 No.10685493

    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:17 No.10685545
         File1277288235.jpg-(66 KB, 600x750, 1244618666440.jpg)
    66 KB
    Some games I've been involved in.

    Naruto as a heretic monk (NOT a ninja), who lost all his limbs and replaced them with detachable steampunk versions. Deemed Chakra impure and set out to cleanse it wherever it arose. He got some flak about the technology, until it was highlighted that there's crazy mech puppets/genetic technology in Naruto.

    Dragon Ball z as a diplomatic demoness. I'm sure you can all guess how well that went down.

    Elder Scrolls as a trap necromancer, cross dressing to juggle an entertainment job to fund Arcane University funding with a personal agenda to unlock the secrets of eternal youth. In a world filled with berserker tigermen overflowing with magical power, he actually did okay.

    Ran for a short while a Fist of the North Star/Fallout type game. Brutally harsh with a huge focus on survival. People catching diseases/starving/suffering due to adverse conditions and lots of exploration of the lonely wastes of humanity. Was openly avoided by the majority of players who were denied dbz ki throwing killing machines and "Nobody wants to be in a game where they could die so easily"
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:20 No.10685581
    Game starts.
    One sue meets another.
    More Sues pile in.
    Posts taper off into nothingness.
    Everyone joins new game.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:21 No.10685600
    In a forum I use to frequent, some faggot started a freeform DBZ RPG.
    Just to troll the fuck out of them, I played Krillin.
    Plot was very straightforward, even for Dragonball standards. The group gets called into space by the GMPC to help combat an evil threat.
    I decided to play Krillin as the inofficial team leader and as their negotiator and the others just rolled with it.
    What it ended with was Ciaphas Krillin, Hero of the Universe, successfully taking credit for all the victories. Afterwards, a lot of money, fame and alien bitches ensued.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:22 No.10685609
    A Naruto original character that's actually cooler and more original than the canon characters? Well, I guess that isn't hard, but it's still surprising.

    Also that last game sounds awesome.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:23 No.10685623
    when i was elementary school i DMed at least several campaigns that spanned whole years of freeform games whose players really ran the range from future quarterback to software engineer to drop out. back then we were all equal and freeform though our campaigns might have been they were epic and awesome and untainted
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:26 No.10685653
    but i also used to play on a semi-chat room (an auto updating website that ran on some ghetto script) called Inn of the Weary Traveler

    I still have a bunch of the posts saved from myself and various other people. Shall I post them?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:28 No.10685677
    For the last game, I made it a point for people to post me their character information directly and I would only post up their descriptions. This was to avoid people reading up on each other and knowing who actually had a gun that was loaded/who was military blackops/knew a martial art etc etc..

    As for conflict betweens players and enviroment. I read their backstories and stated them out with the oWoD system. Only I could see the stats, knew the system and the rolls which were done with an online dice roller. People wrote what they attempted and I would post the results.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:30 No.10685695
    While the freeform RP site I go to isn't actually very bad, there are a couple people on there that are pretty damn sad.

    One is a guy who really, REALLY likes ninjas. Like, all of his characters are ninja based. Most of his posts go on about how awesome he is and how he's gotta go fight ninja monkeys that pop out of nowhere. Can't stop talking about his cool ass ninja clothes, all with the grammar and writing ability of a 4th grader. And he tries to hijack threads from time to time. The only reason we keep him around is because his posts are fucking hilarious and everybody just humors.

    However, there's another guy who insists on RPing IN THE SECOND PERSON, like you're reading some shitty VN. That shit gets so annoying I just skip over everything he says.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:35 No.10685764
         File1277289333.jpg-(67 KB, 396x378, jamesbondcrab.jpg)
    67 KB

    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:35 No.10685767
    Only if they involve schadenfreude.

    You are a good person.

    What's the forum? Or at least, what is it about?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:42 No.10685868
    When the 2nd Harry Potter book first came out, my friend and I started up a Hogwarts RP that took place during WWII. We had pretty simple rules-- write in coherent english, don't fuck up canon, know a little bit about the time period, don't fuck up canon, no sex on the forums, and don't fuck up canon.

    So the first thing she did was invite all her weaboo retard friends. The profiles submitted were stuff like-

    1. Hot Topic goth princess. Thinks WWII happened in 1997 or something because she mentions Marilyn Manson like six times in her character profile.

    2. Tom Riddle's sister who is in love with Snape because for some reason, Snape is around in the 1940s? Also, is it ok if she does a pregnancy plot where she spends her 7 years at Hogwarts popping out Snape's babies? Is it ok if we run a plot for her where her character is Harry Potter's mother?

    3. Japanese exchange student. Because that wouldn't be a problem in WWII or anything. Focuses his power through a katana instead of a wand because weeaboo. Ridiculous yaoi cliche with a crush on every boy.

    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:54 No.10686028
    Please tell me you have more. Harry Potter roleplayers are the absolute bottom of the barrel. Or they were until Twilight came around, I guess.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:57 No.10686052
    there is no way i could convey how sorry i am for you
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:57 No.10686061
    Place called Daeluin.

    Filled with kids from neopets, wannabe writefags, and a few decent people. The admin groups are basically the online clique of the guy who hosts the board.

    Be prepared to be told to change your character with no explanation why other than "Cause I'm the fucking admin".
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:58 No.10686074
    Basically a high school for superpowered kids. The admin and the mods are pretty lax about everything, so you'd have to raise some serious shit to get yourself hated/banned.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)06:59 No.10686092
    No offense but that's easily the most common freeform roleplay concept, and 99% of them suck and or exist only as wish fulfillment.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:04 No.10686157
    Well this one's been running continuously for at least 2-3 years, so they must be doing something right.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:06 No.10686171
    You know what's been running continuously for more than ten years? The Neopets RP boards. Doesn't make 'em good.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:06 No.10686179
    touche, good sir.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:09 No.10686210
    We had a freeform for WoD vampires, went good for a month, all 12 of us worked together, then the twilight fangirls found it, it died in days.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:15 No.10686278

    Those were the most awful ones, though everyone was pretty low tier. The major problem was that somehow nobody understood even the basics of a 1940s setting- I thought it was pretty common knowledge that there was a war going on, but I guess not.

    There was one girl who sent in a really good profile- an orphan of the London Blitz, pretty minimal magical talent but with a minor gift of prophecy. But then she wrote some plot for herself where her character tried to become an animagus and got stuck as a dog-girl furry, and got butthurt when being half-dog caused other characters to treat her differently.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:18 No.10686312
    God, I hate the people who insist on playing unique snowflake characters and then get angry out of character when they're treated differently. I play pariahs and then get pissed at my GM because the NPCs are indifferent towards me.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:20 No.10686329
    In retrospect, the old Egg Pets RP board had most of the problems listed here

    They were still fun as all hell
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:23 No.10686367
    Well, when life gives you shitty RP people, you can either try to RP back, or quit.
    You could have had a story arc about her getting her real form back or something.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:30 No.10686430
    ok, i trolled a freeform once. I gave my character, a middle aged architect, the power to enforce the laws of physics. You can see how that went.

    The moment when I said to one guy that he just ripped himself apart [he was going to tackle me at supersonic speeds] I got kicked from the game.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:31 No.10686442
    So I joined this mostly freeform Rp based on the XIN series. XIN is a flash series so it was pretty open for original content. So the concept is that schools are enforced with Corporal Punishment. My character was a military brat that practiced Aikido as a hobby. Characters basically had to fight each other to get 'stronger' and there where people that had been around for years so just about anyone could stomp my guy. My character got in a fight with this dude who's chatacter was based of the appearance of this Korean Male Model. In the fight he had no understanding of physics in general. Like he was thrown onto the cement from midair and he punched the ground with his fist to stop himself from hitting his head. He would dodge just about anything else after that.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:31 No.10686443
    I was involved in a freeform "sci-fi" clusterfuck for a few years at university. It was filled to the brim with shitty sues and author inserts written in to fulfil the player's fantasies. No only that, but the power creep was ridiculous.

    The GM was mostly fair, uncharacteristically for him actually (in IRL he's a fat basement dwelling neckbeard that nobody likes, with creepy dominance/control issues that have become increasingly obvious). He did though have a few characters that were silently agreed to be "untouchable". This was his Admiral character, who was "dignified" (he liked saying that word, but I'm not sure he knows what it means). Utterly straight laced, arrogant, unlikeable, treats other people like shit, selfish, yet apparently he is worshipped by his men. Also is an immortal from the prehistory of mankind. Eventually the GM saw sense and retired the character but he lingered in the background, still infuriatingly arrogant and untouchable.

    Then there was Sean. I cannot express how much rage the player & self-insert wrecked on EVERYONE. To sum up what he did would take too long. Did you know Max Planck figured out the smallest probable distance and the smallest probable length of time? Well he created the Progenitors who reacted in Planck time. They could also teleport anywhere and rewrite the laws of physics at will, but mostly they just acted like retards. They were supposed to maintain the stability of reality, but actually they just behaved like egotistical fucktards and beat up anyone who didn't like Sean's Mary Sue empire Sequolia. Eventually and after plenty of tears and eight hour IM arguments we made him the joke of the group; most people agreed that he only made a bird-like race so he could have big bird penises with giant penis shaped spaceships. "Space penis" became common slang for power-gaming after that. Sean together with another player created some of the most retarded shit you can ever imagine.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:33 No.10686468
    Off the top of my head:
    - Galaxy sized space ships. Let's think about the logistics of that for a second.
    - A giant laser that could destroy 1,000,000,000,000 galaxies in one shot, and could fire every hour. I think at one point they also destroyed a higher-dimension of existence in one shot, but I'm not sure.
    - Progenitors, as described above. Planck Time is now a meme where I come from. Oh yeah and when they die they retreat to their private pocket dimension where their true mind lies, which instantly recreates their body in any form they choose.
    - Jacen Ikoda, who alternated between psychotic dictator and benevolent founder of a nation. Everybody fanatically loved him all the same. Also, society never changed and there were no sub-cultures, sub-groups, or dissidents even though he founded an empire of a 100,000 x googalplex worlds. Oh yes..
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:34 No.10686479
    just play as an average soldier who uses whatever basic weapons fit the setting, then when your about to get sued my some stupid godmoder have your char throw sand in their eyes/kick them in the balls (or vag) and run away...put a spike trap/punji sticks/whatever on the road and run away, carry on doing it until you either 'win' the fight or they get really pissed and try to get you banned.

    With any luck, after a while they will stop playing over powered 'look @ how awesome i am' chars.

    Also on a side note, my friends won't let me join in their harry potter games after i made my char walked up to voldemort and shot him in the back of the head, then put him in a block of cement and dropped him into the sea....i was an awesome defence against the dark arts teacher :P
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:34 No.10686487
    The Inter-dimensional Alliance, a nation with a redundant name as all the realities collapsed on each other. Many players controlled one galaxy as a quietly agreed standard but the IDA was the size of several billion universes. The player rationalised this by saying.... well actually that would take way too long to explain. It didn't really make much sense but basically boils down to him assuming that all growth is constant, linear, and never-endin. It was a nation of a googalplex galaxies. It built galaxy sized spaceships to patrol its space, but after an international outcry (of people who thought that it was fucking retarded) they were converted into hospital ships. One of them went rogue and destroyed trillions of galaxies with its giant laser. Which insta-killed one of the GM's races that everyone liked, thus pissing everyone off. And nobody but Sean could participant in the storyline, because it had retreated into "unstable space" that would destroy all spaceships instantly. How did a galaxy sized spaceship sneak in there when nano-engineered micro-survey probes can't? Well you see it used Jacen and Sean's Progenitor-made technology to shrink the galaxy ship down to the size of an atom. After that it just flew past the unstable space!
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:35 No.10686492
    Some of the other players were bad, but they were mostly following their lead. Jupitor and sun-sized ships were the standard size of a capital warship in that setting. Then there was Gillie, but I can't really explain that in full either. He was just bad, played too much Final Fantasy, and had a very very strict idea of where his plots would go. He tried to make a bad guy race and failed miserably.

    It had some redeeming features. Their was an entire race of Oscars for a start. Really great player behind them. There was a race of giant robot-building mushrooms who excreted hallucinogens when excited, who added some much needed humour. The GM's girlfriend (not any more lol) was an awesome roleplayer too. There was a guy who was unoriginal and shitty, but eventually he wised up that trying to put Dante from DMC into everything doesn't work and he eventually became a pretty interesting player.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:43 No.10686583
    I once roleplayed in a real-time freeform game that was based loosely on Dragon Warrior. I played an even tempered, slightly shell shocked veteran mage who specialized in controlling temperature and basically worked as a fantasy private eye.

    At one point, two guys ran up to me and recruited me to fight a necromancer. It sounded dumb, but there wasn't much else going on in the game, so I decided to run with it. The first guy played a warrior with slight magical talent, kind of a poor roleplayer, but he tried and didn't stand out as especially bad.

    The second guy was a shadow manipulating ninja/assassin dressed in all black named Shade. I later learned that he had earned the ire of the rest of the community by assassinating a significant NPC in public and then teleporting away.

    We get to the graveyard and the necromancer (another player) is there, raising zombies and not doing anything interesting. The spellblade guy charges her for ultimate justice, etc, but Shade runs in front of him and starts doing a bunch of elaborate and ridiculous combat maneuvers with a katana and shadow magic.

    A GM was watching this, and ruled that Shade should be out of mana. He responded to this by dropping to his knees, then going through some generic shonen power boost transformation. He would do this three more times during the fight. The forms all had the same capabilities, they were just progressively stronger and flashy looking, and he could stay in them for as long as he wanted. No one thought to ask why he didn't just maintain the strongest form at all times.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:44 No.10686588

    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:51 No.10686630
    Eventually we destroy all of the zombies, and the necromancer summons a giant demon to fight us. In universe, this thing is apparently powerful enough to use us as hors d'oeuvres, and in fact the necromancer should not have been able to summon it, both of which the GM points out. Spellblade and I get our asses kicked but Shade dodges/blocks every attack with his shadow powers and eventually the fight comes to a standstill.

    The necromancer begins her dramatic speech, the demon standing in front of her to defend her from any attacks. Shade keeps interrupting her with hackneyed wangst about how he's cursed and feels no reason to continue living. It took all of my willpower not to suggest, in character, that he just off himself, then.

    The necromancer lowers her hood, revealing a skull instead of a face, but mentions in her pose that this is an illusion. There's no way any of us could know this, since liches aren't unheard of in this setting, but Shade somehow deduces it and dispels the illusion by, wait for it, shooting a shadow at her face. Even though she has full cover, and that makes no sense at all.

    We were all so stunned by how stupid that that was that we just sort of went our separate ways without wrapping up the scene. I'm pretty sure the GM declared that the entire thing never happened anyway.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)07:59 No.10686695
    40K Freeform, I made an Inquisitor amongst guardsmen. Wasn't throwing his weight around, just right place right time to aid his investigation sort of deal. Nothing more elaborate than bionic eye, bolt pistol and chainsword. I imagined him as making his way up the commisariat.
    Seeing as my Inq was met with approval, someone else made one...
    "He grav chutes in, a bandolier of vortex grenades about hos shoulders. Holstering his twin psycannons, he draws his Frost Blade and turns to the group; 'This operation is mine now, under penalty of Exterminatus...' "
    I quit soon after.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)08:10 No.10686786
    My friend used to be a moderator on a Bleach roleplay forum as a favor to another friend. It was a pretty poor board, filled with the usual pretentious douchebags who think length and angst equal writing quality. But there was one character that stood out, and he made sure I saw his profile.


    I typed out a really long description before I realized that the profile still existed. In short, very young character made by a proud pedophile who is hated because he is super smart and good at everything. His power is creating perfect illusions that you can't realize are illusions. His death (a necessity to become a Soul Reaper, I guess) occurred when a burglar raped and murdered him on Christmas morning. The profile repeatedly mentions his expert detective skills but fails to demonstrate them.

    Note that this person was later given a staff position.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)08:32 No.10687020
    A friend was a GM on a generic fantasy freeform RP for a year or so and asked me to join him once. He was a low ranked GM that did not deal with character approval. I made a human archer that had digestive tract issues and was not fond of dwarves. He had weaknesses and was a fairly solid character. I thought him out over a week and submitted it. Denied. Not only denied, but denied with a 7 paragraph PM that detailed how my 'cynical attitude would undermine the quality of the RP with a character like that'. At that point i chose to troll the fucks. I made a half-demon emo angsty motherfucker like the rest of them and warned my friend that I was going to fuck shit up. He said he would be sure that none of my actions were revoked as long as I did not break any forum rules. He and I then joined with an evil aligned party to do some generic crap.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)08:39 No.10687083

    The group consisted of me, my friend, some random alright RPer, another GM, and that GM's girlfriend. The characters were all demons that did not really know each other except for the GM and his girlfriend having their characters be lovers (obviously...). The group was hunting some arbitrary object while a group of paladins led by three other RPers hunted us. They eventually found us and had us surrounded by over 40 mounted paladins, we were boned. My character was adept at manipulating flames and some other mary sue crap I chose to get him accepted in the first place, but I made sure not to godmode or troll until the moment of truth arrived. The GMPC ordered my character to surround himself with intense flames and he would use telekinesis to hurl him at the paladins (great plan right?) . The attack did not work, so the GM came up with an even better one!!! I KNOW LETS DO THE SAME THING OVER AGAIN BUT THIS TIME EAT THIS MAGIC CRYSTAL THAT WILL MAKE YOU UNSTOPPABLE WHAT COULD GO WRONG!!!! (just according to plan) The half-demon ate the crystal and surrounded himself in the hottest flames possible, the GMPC hurled him into the paladins and they were all killed by the brilliant plan, but now it was my turn.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)08:43 No.10687120
    Yes. It was one of the most retarded things I've ever seen. In fact it is probably the most retarded thing I've ever seen, and it shames me that I was involved with it only 18 months ago.

    It did at least get me interested in science, because to make my argument that they were all completely fucking retarded I had to learn a little bit of theoretical science and give serious thought into how humanity might develop in the future, and what the ultimate endpoint of technological development might be.

    That damn game was just retards trying to make up for their failed lives with shitty wish fulfilment characters and plot lines. It says a lot that out of our entire group, all the shitty players were university drop outs while the ones that were fun to play with and made sensible plots all stuck with their degrees and finished it to the end.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)08:48 No.10687179

    The flames were so intense that a half human brain could not withstand them. The brain damaged caused the half-demon to become essentially retarded. It was at this point that he noticed the pearls that the GM's girlfriend character wore in her hair. He ran to her and began trying to eat the pearls. The GMPC attacked the half-demon to defend his love, but thanks to the power of the herp derp crystal, the half-demon tore him in half with fire, cauterizing the wounds. My character proceeded to then flail the GMPC's severed legs at his face until his detached bowels loosed themselves. The half-demon then attempted to feed this excrement to the dying upper half of the GMPC. The GMPC choked on it and died. My character then returned to eating hair-pearls. (at this point, both my friend and the GM's girlfriend had sent me multiple PMs that all essentially said WTFWTFWTFOMGWTF). She pushed my character off; he then tore off her arms so that she could not resist him. He then used her wound as a love hole; the first of many love holes that had continued use for hours even after she bled to death. My friend had known shit would hit the fan so he grabbed the other player escaped. The half-demon wandered around for a while until he came across the GMPC's town (that GM loved that thing like a child, drawing maps, using bullshit to break sieges, all sorts of retarded crap that he thought was literary gold). The half-demon incinerated the entire town and then had a nice orgy with a dozen corpses. The next day he found a shiny diamond ring on a corpse and spent the last days of his life sitting on a rock attempting to break the stone open with his teeth. He died from dehydration. I loved every minute of that RP.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)08:53 No.10687238
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)08:54 No.10687246

    >> Avyrex !!yd+M3y7uDJ1 06/23/10(Wed)08:55 No.10687258
    I had something like that happen in D&D once, actually. Made a character who was basically a character I played in a different game entirely. His background involved him having post-traumatic stress disorder due to being stuck on an island inhabited by regenerating insect monsters. DM thought they were awesome. Has used them in every game to date.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)08:57 No.10687280

    I love you...
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:01 No.10687328

    My favorite part of the whole ordeal though was that after I was banned, I had no idea what was going on in those forums. I got a call from my friend (who lives like 6 hours away from me) and he wanted to go to a pub with me. We met at this pub and spent the entire night talking about the aftermath of the event. Apparently that GM's girlfriend found my antics funny, so that GM physically hit her in rage. I hope he got buttraped during his stay in prison.
    The GM who initially had denied me went on a crusade saying that each new person to come into the forums not only has to give a character description to be approved, but upon their initial entry have to write out a detailed description about their REAL LIFE so that he could judge them preemptively, lolololol.
    After that event, whenever a player wanted to have their character die, they would copypasta the line "He died from dehydration". This caused so much GM rage that the forum got taken down within a month of my escapade. Feels good, man.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:06 No.10687377
    Freeform RPS are pretty hilarious. Fanfiction.net actually has a ton, I found one that was around ten thousand posts of sonic erp.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:09 No.10687399
    So much win.

    We should find a crappy angsty teen RPG forum to raid....
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:10 No.10687410
    You're a real hero, you know that?

    The closest I've come to anything like this was trolling a Twilight roleplay by playing Dio Brando and semi-accidentally slaughtering canon characters while trying to test the strength of the ultimately inferior vampires. I also tied a werewolf up and threw her in an incinerator. This generated some minor rage until the admin deleted every mention of it, banned me, and forced everyone to pretend it never happened.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:14 No.10687460

    If my friend wasn't a GM that could dispute them removing that thread then it would have been removed and I probably would not have had nearly as much impact. I am really glad he gave me the opportunity to do this.

    If we do raid one I suggest we have someone on the inside to solidify our adventures into the lore, otherwise there is only a minimal amount of rage induced.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:27 No.10687629
    Don't die on me yet...someone else must have a story at this hour.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:32 No.10687703
    I have a bunch of stories but I'm too tired to write them coherently any more.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:32 No.10687704
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:41 No.10687836
    I'm actually in a freeform RP, and while it's full of powergaming folk (myself not excluded) it's pretty fun. It was a high-powered fantasy setting with everyone having some sort of special power, though a lot of people just decided to go with generic black magic. I joined up fairly early on, so I managed to push through my background as the “founder” of the battle system (basically no matter how you beat up your opponent they don’t die, though there’s still pain), and am good friends with the current upholder of the system (a human priestess who can fly - humans being a relative rarity in this setting). Later on, I persuaded a couple of players to act as my servants. Backed with my character’s power to pretty much mess with anything by manipulating their edges and I’m suddenly one of the “go to” people in the RP, which is hell of a lot of fun.
    I’ve also got an alternate character who’s basically a monstergirl with a big sword and the ability to see long distances.

    It’s a pretty sweet gig.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:43 No.10687862
    This sounds like it's worth taking a look at. Any chance I can get a link?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:44 No.10687881
    I remember one guy who decided to play as the same retarded demon catboi in every game he played in, including a historical campaign set in medieval France.
    Because everyone knows that if there's one thing the average medieval peasant loved to see, it was people with glowing cat eyes and claws.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:45 No.10687892

    New raid idea aside from the inside man.
    We find one that has less than 5% human characters, we then proceed to enter the game with 20 or so humans to carry out an ethnic cleansing, specifically targeting all non-human PCs until we die/are banned/get bored.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:46 No.10687899
    Let me guess, he complained because people treated him differently, right?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:46 No.10687903

    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:51 No.10687957
    Ehhh... nah. The mods'll might just kill me if I link it to 4chan again. One of the reasons it's decent is that they're pretty strict on the entry requirements and having to filter out a load of terrible apps might put me in their bad books (some of them do browse /tg/)

    Also I'm trollfacing because no-one's recognised what I'm referencing.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:51 No.10687964
    Yeah. The rest of the players in that particular campaign were a bunch of fairly normal people for the most part, and yet they did not react in the slightest to the appearance of a self-proclaimed 'demon catboi' who had glowing eyes, enormous claws instead of hands and could run so fast that he blurred. In fact, they were ridiculously open and trusting with him and even went out to his mansion in the woods (oh yeah, he had a mansion that was surrounded by special magic stones that meant nobody he didn't like could get in, or find it, or some such bollocks.).
    Still didn't stop him from angsting all over the place about how everybody hated him and nobody could ever love him and mommy why and blah blah blah, though. All in the most ridiculously poorly spelled, two-sentence posts you've ever seen. He made up for the short lengths of his posts by posting literally every time anyone said or did anything, however!
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:53 No.10687985
    Could you email it to me, then? It's been so long since I had a decent roleplay experience.

    if that helps build any sympathy for my plight.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:57 No.10688027
    Hey, man. What was the name of the One Piece board? I want to make a character with little to no combat skills and troll at the same time.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)09:59 No.10688052
    No idea. It was years ago. If it happened today I would have trolled them too.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:00 No.10688071
    Sucks. Guess I have to go searching for a One Piece Forum then. I'll post results if anything good happens.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:02 No.10688096
    I used to be an admin on One Piece Explore. It's filled with Mary Sues, tyrannical staff, overly complex rules, and general stupidity, but it's not nearly as bad as the other forum I was talking about. You could troll them, but you'd have to go a little bit farther than just making a good character.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:05 No.10688125
    Alright, I'm taking suggestions. Tell me what gets on those guys nerves and I will troll the shit out of One Piece Explore
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:06 No.10688141
    You're a tripfag AND you expect us to feel sorry for your lack of credit? You are the cancer of 4chan, who does not understand anonymous.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:06 No.10688145
    I got it.

    I kind of want to explain it to you, but watching you not get it is funny.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:07 No.10688165
    Unfortunately I can't give you much advice since it's been so long since I went there. The only thing I remember causing a major shitstorm was when a moderator posted comics poking fun at the worst roleplayers on the forum and a bunch of white knights complained, leading to him being fired with the threat of a ban. That was actually why I ended up leaving.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:08 No.10688175
    Sent you a mail~

    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:10 No.10688206
    Oh damn it Anons. You and your...yeah.

    Oh well. I suppose angsting about how everything sucks is fun too.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:12 No.10688230
    That's cool. Have any ideas for really crappy fruit powers?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:13 No.10688259
    Insist on taking the lava Logia and everyone will instantly hate you.

    The fruit system is kind of restrictive, you can either get a random one from a list of ones created by the staff or pick a weak one. I suppose you could take the cat Zoan and play an uber kawaii ^_____^ catgirl or something.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:15 No.10688277
    Thankfully, I went to a Hellsing freeform RPG.

    Now, Hellsing isn't top-tier anime, but it certainly doesn't attract retard cunts like Naruto and Bleach.

    The fact that you could take only one primary power did help.

    IIRC, my vampire(British-aligned) basically could melt into that weird Alucard shadowform, and fire a shitload of guns, grenade launchers and other forms of heavy weapons from that shadow form.

    At a certain point during the invasion of the Vatican and the Nazis in London, I managed to consume a SAM site.

    Much fun was had with that, until some psychic Catholic monk fried a shitload of supernaturals with a holy-self-immolation-nuke-force-thing.

    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:16 No.10688296
         File1277302609.png-(22 KB, 236x253, 1234.png)
    22 KB
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:18 No.10688317
    Okay yes you humiliated me with your knowledge of something I don't care about, I got that a while ago.

    Let's go back to posting stories.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:23 No.10688387
    I've actually done extensive free-form RP on a very good forum, though nowadays it's shifted over more to rules-based games.

    A long while back, though, there was a player that is pretty much everything you would expect out of this thread. Always played demon catbois, godmoded, etc. Long story short, he left after getting the living shit trolled out of him.

    Several years later, he was revealed at the last second to be the villain of a fourth-wall-breaking crossover RP. Shit was so cash.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:40 No.10688610
    Being a reasonably young female, I used to like Harry Potter. A lot.
    I frequented one of promoinent fandom boards, they had a freeform RP going on there. I never signed up for it, having previous bad experiences with hat sort of thing, but in bouts of masochism I did read some posts over at the RP subboard.
    The clusterfuck of canon!sues, character rape and general bullshit was overwhelming. They actually assigned characters from the books to boards users, who promptyly suefied them into oblivion. Also rampart yaoi. Not even slash, not even gar romance. Rampart weeaboo aoi! nOH MY GOD HEAD EXPLODES AT THE VERY THOUGHT!
    I'll never, ever try freeform RP after that.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:41 No.10688634
    forgive the typos.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:43 No.10688653
    HP remains pretty cool imo.
    You seem somewhat arbitrary.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:43 No.10688662
    Eh, you were asking for it.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:47 No.10688704
    Is there any where I can be the little girl?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:47 No.10688707
    Yes HP remained cool up to book 5.
    That board's RP was very not cool, and me, I'm always arbitrary :P

    Yes, I WAS asking for it. Like I said, Bouts of masochism. Same reason I read twilight and watched Dungeons and Dragons movie.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:53 No.10688772
    I think I remember one, some shokuso high school thing that had two player options. "Schoolgirl" and "Monster". The site even had a choose your own adventure thing!
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:58 No.10688829
    That reminds me of another one.

    The plot was okay and most of the members seemed like decent roleplayers, but there were a bunch of arbitrary rules; Guns weren't allowed, even though it took place five years in the future in the real world, since the admin considered them to be "cheap insta kills". Katanas and pyrokinetic powers were both okay. You were only allowed one character, and you had to fill out a personality quiz to determine your faction, which in turn would determine a large portion of your history, personality, physical appearance and whether or not you had powers. And you were supposed to answer it out of character.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)10:58 No.10688833

    ca/tg/irls somehow make topics always awkward.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)11:01 No.10688865
    Their only purpose is to have their holes fucked and bear our seed.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)11:01 No.10688871
    I apologise. :(
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)11:02 No.10688879

    Surely you meant seeding our bears.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)11:04 No.10688899
    >> Githmire 06/23/10(Wed)11:04 No.10688908
         File1277305463.jpg-(647 KB, 1920x1082, wallpaper-293577.jpg)
    647 KB
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)11:16 No.10689067
    Your pain was your weakness leaving you.

    It's easier if you view it like this.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)11:18 No.10689093
    Where is this?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)11:19 No.10689110
    Cheers! :D
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)11:21 No.10689134
    He already said he doesn't want it posted publicly.

    (Yes, despite all the people mocking me for not figuring out it was a Touhou board, it does actually exist.)
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)11:26 No.10689182
    >halfway to batshit Crazy Land and was a slut to boot.

    No good? Bah, that's the best there is.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)11:30 No.10689219
    god damn I love that store from the image.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)11:39 No.10689292

    it still exists..shit must be well over ten years old.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)12:02 No.10689554
    Nah, Not all Potter RP'ers are that bad. I ran a freeform potterverse RP that actually went pretty well. Set it in the late 60's, at an American equivalent of Hogwarts called Innsmouth.
    Lovecraft + Rowling = Win.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)12:05 No.10689591
    You got lucky.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)12:08 No.10689617
    Oh, I know. I was damned lucky.

    Honestly, part of it was that everyone involved was really into the idea of going Darker and Edgier with a basically whimsical setting.
    >> Red_Spur 06/23/10(Wed)12:09 No.10689628
         File1277309362.jpg-(41 KB, 340x444, rage.jpg)
    41 KB

    >Lovecraft + Rowling = Win.
    >Lovecraft + Rowling

    ...im sorry, what? i was so mad just then that i blacked out while i was reading, but did you just say that there was a "win" made of Lovecraft + OHMYGODYOUDID
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)12:11 No.10689653
         File1277309469.jpg-(85 KB, 1280x720, 1273445136412.jpg)
    85 KB
    Alright /tg/ I've got a site for you that is atrocious. A while back We had this guy come into out local writing club and start submitting reams of paper with utter SHIT written on it. Stuff was fucking terrible. All of it felt like a bad anime.

    Long story short. Turns out he was basically rewriting Freeform RP sessions from the site here

    pic related
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)12:14 No.10689688
    Bah, that's not rage-worthy. Lovecraft plus anything equals awesome.

    Except lovecraft plus AvP. That was just fucking retarded
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)12:15 No.10689702
    Why would you mix those three things that makes no fucking sense?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)12:16 No.10689707
    Tried 'em, came up against indifferent DMs and Mary Sues galore. It was boring, not rageworthy.

    I was a lot younger then.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)12:18 No.10689732
    It happens man we feel for you.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)12:20 No.10689749
    Seriously. And yet Fox did it. Look at the first motion picture. weird temple in the arctic full of otherworldly horrors? Let's forget that canonically, it's gotta be fucking hot for the damned things to breed... Ugh. Now *I'm* raging.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)12:20 No.10689756
    I was in a few.

    The only ones I remember well were a freeform DnD game set in Eberron... it was actually kinda fun.

    Yea admittedly it was WEEABOO as all fuck at times (we used the Warforged as TTGL to fight Il-Lavishtar) but it was a pretty light-hearted tone overall I think.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)12:21 No.10689762
    was a reply to
    by the way. I fail at replys.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)12:24 No.10689802
    So /tg/, are there actually any half-decent FFRP sites out there?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)12:26 No.10689824
    We've yet to see any evidence.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)12:28 No.10689841
         File1277310487.png-(108 KB, 600x600, Seal of the Soviet Republic of(...).png)
    108 KB
    To be honest, NSEurope's the only freeform RPG I've ever spent any good length of time on, and it was pretty win once upon a time (less so now that it's been nuked and rebooted twice). I did take part in a Grandia-based RPG once, but the mods got bored with it and shut it down only a week or so after I joined.

    Then there was VGFusion, a sort of "Police the video game multiverse and prevent villains from invading other games" thing. It lasted only three days and one mission.

    Kicking Bowser and the Koopa Troopers out of the Street Fighter verse was pretty awesome though.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)12:45 No.10690064
    But the arctic is the hottest place on the earth! How else would the protagonist of that shitty film be able to stand around in a fucking T-Shirt while the Predator ship lands, picks up their dead, examines her, gives her a gift and then fucks off again, leaving her in the middle of the arctic tundra with no cold-weather gear, no supplies and no way of summoning help, AND YET STILL HAVE HER CANONICALLY SURVIVE?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)12:46 No.10690089
    > (it's ok, we all have dark secrets).
    I was never a teenager. It never happened.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)13:08 No.10690423

    Post forum name.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)13:08 No.10690429
    Clearly she's a freeform character. One super speed nap is all she would need to recover from that.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)13:10 No.10690459

    post that forums name so I can troll the shit out of that bitch.

    Post forum name.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)13:12 No.10690483
    Post the thread.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)13:14 No.10690508
    To be fair, the Mangekyou is gained by the emotions of loss, rather then the actual loss. If you truly believed you killed your best friend, or that your best friend died rather, you could get it.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)13:15 No.10690518
    f5likemad.jpeg bump
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)13:15 No.10690521
    I'd love to, but this was years ago and I don't remember the name of the forum or even any details about my character beyond what I told you.

    Had it happened today, I would have done a hell of a lot more than just quietly leaving the forum.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)13:16 No.10690542
    The problem wasn't just that he broke the rules, it was that he circumvented them to keep his character from having performed an evil (read: at least kind of interesting) act while still making him more powerful.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)13:24 No.10690650
         File1277313899.png-(6 KB, 50x50, wthplz.gif.png)
    6 KB
    First of all, pic related - its my reaction face for most of what is written in this thread.

    I've been spared throughout my FFRP life from all of this drama llamaing and HALF ANGEL HALF DEAMON ANGST shit that everyone else is talking about...

    Well, I might not have anything as interesting as all of this, or well. I might have but I'll dig up the nasty details.

    Though I am in several FFRP's at the moment that do not fail as hard as the things described in this topic, most are pretty modded though.

    *gives out url's for raids / actual joining / trolls and whatever.*

    http://www.crimsonazurite.com/providence/index.php <= a rp based on the animoo fate stay night. thats somewhat neat. suffers from lack of members though.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)13:25 No.10690660
    You know, I wish I could find a half-decent Naruto forum not swarmed by this sort of shit, because the world is actually fairly interesting when you get into it.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)13:26 No.10690666
    Is that the series where the main character has an attractive female version of King Arthur as a servant, and he has to have sex with her to recharge her powers?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)13:26 No.10690668
         File1277313979.jpg-(306 KB, 944x976, Naw man, Naw.jpg)
    306 KB
    > My face at half the stories in this thread
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)13:27 No.10690684

    yes, though there has _thus far_ not been any ERP going on in the RP itself, implied or stated.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)13:28 No.10690697
    How do they recharge their powers, then?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)13:30 No.10690716

    well in the anime -and the visual novel- they only have sex because the main character fails retarded amounts as a magician. all the others can just transfer a portion of their own mana over some sort of spiritual usb connection.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)13:41 No.10690874
    Hey guys, if you archive on sup/tg/, does it save any posts that are made after the archive? I've never done it before, but this thread seems worth preserving.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)13:43 No.10690908
         File1277315016.jpg-(101 KB, 746x621, zeon.jpg)
    101 KB
    About 9 years ago, I ran a hex-based Gundam universe mash-up with plenty of forum RP.

    Combat was the unholy bastard child of Shadowrun and a hex-based mech game I had played prior. It actually didn't turn out too bad for most of it(Dice... dice everywhere). Combat ran smoothly and I had more than enough players to keep things interesting. I setup a basic plot line and factions, assigned a couple veteran players from the combat testing to faction leaders/important story characters, and let everyone go at it. The lead up to the battles and the aftermath, plot hooks, game progression, and character profiles/stories were usually done on the forums, though there was plenty of RP during the actual fights. Players were given some serious leeway to customize and flesh out their characters/mobile suits and their stories and perspectives on different events were usually pretty interesting and made all of the GMing/website work worth it.

    There was one minor hiccup, but it wasn't too bad. When I say not too bad, I mean "I actually had to made a ridiculous strong GM character towards the end, so a hambeast would stop obsessively writing gay rape-fics about my character". Yeah. Pretty creepy.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)13:53 No.10691061
    Oh, okay. Continue posting links, maybe I'll discover something I won't hate.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)14:01 No.10691210
    Bumping for more stories
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)14:14 No.10691399

    Looks eerily like Brookhurst Hobbies....
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)14:18 No.10691459
    Archived it here.


    Hopefully this is still here when I wake up. If not, it will live on in my heart/suptg.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)14:20 No.10691491
         File1277317247.png-(489 KB, 465x619, 1277138820485.png)
    489 KB
    There were some pretty fucking funny stories in this thread, the funniest is >>10687328 and >>10687179

    Also can someone give me a link to a good rp forum. I haven't roleplayed much but I think its mad fun, only problem is i've never been on a good rp forum before.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)14:23 No.10691525
    Was a good friend of a guy who ran a DB-Z rpg forum. Personally I had no interest in the DBZ universe, but trolled as moderator playing as a golem made out of meatloaf. Fuck yeah, mod powers. Oh, eventually I got eaten after I lost a fight, I gave him indigestion.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)14:28 No.10691595

    Hey I heard >>>/b/ was a pretty cool place to role play.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)14:31 No.10691633
         File1277317907.png-(365 KB, 384x800, 1277045224033.png)
    365 KB

    www.spacebattles.com Go there then got to "story debates" last time I checked there were some pretty good threads up.
    >> Hojou Sounn !!liSXS3ubWZA 06/23/10(Wed)14:40 No.10691766
    I once was in a freeform RP set in the Sengoku period of Japan. The major rules were [1. be literate, you fucks], [2. don't disrupt canon] and [3. know a bit about the time period before you post].

    I made a samurai named Katou Daiki. He was a lower samurai, not very important and very cowardly. He had some kind of persecution complex and took out his anger on the peasants that he came across and was only known for being a huge dick. But all in all, he was a 'realistic' character for that setting and I was gonna have fun playing him.

    Most of the players were decently competent and played interesting but still HUMAN characters. I remember one guy was a high-ranking samurai with an incredible lust for geisha and most of his motives were geared toward getting MO' POONTANG. Another guy was pretty much an Oscar [he sat around and drank tea and didn't give no fuck about anything else] but he was still cool and added humor to the game. Still another one was the tactician for a minor force but he was crazy ambitious. He had no fighting skills at all but he was awesomely diplomatic and roleplayed really well.
    >> Hojou Sounn !!liSXS3ubWZA 06/23/10(Wed)14:41 No.10691776
         File1277318490.jpg-(94 KB, 300x348, forgiven.jpg)
    94 KB

    Then this...thing joined. This hambeast made a wolfgirl daemon with a secret ninjutsu power that shot red lightning everywhere. This wolfgirl was in control of the MOST POWERFUL FORCE IN TEH JAPANZ which was made entirely out of half-furry warriors with magical powers. It surprised us when she was actually decently literate.

    Most of us didn't go along with it and largely ignored her sue bullshit. Then she decided to kill everyone who was ignoring her. Then this bro of a moderator stepped in and posted a long message that pretty much amounted to "You're an idiot. Get the fuck out."

    The hambeast never posted again, and much fun was had. We never really finished that story [the tactician ended up becoming the big bad guy] but it was cash while it lasted.

    Then the forum got bombed into oblivion. One day it just 404'd and never went up again. Tears were shed.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)14:43 No.10691806
    How the hell did she even get her character approved? Or did you guys not do that?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)14:45 No.10691826
    bb.stardestroyer.net Go there and check out the boards, there are always some pretty good threads up.
    >> Hojou Sounn !!liSXS3ubWZA 06/23/10(Wed)14:46 No.10691839
         File1277318765.jpg-(61 KB, 640x427, yonigga.jpg)
    61 KB

    Character approval wasn't really in the deal. We figured we didn't need it since most people on that forum were bros.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)14:46 No.10691849

    By "Oscar", do you mean he fucked cats?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)14:47 No.10691859
    Butthurt spacebattles Republican spotted.
    >> Hojou Sounn !!liSXS3ubWZA 06/23/10(Wed)14:50 No.10691914

    see this
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)14:54 No.10691985
    I spent a few years on a Halo RP. From shortly after Halo 2 came out to around the time ODST was released it was fairly active. The users were varied. Some of them were pretty cool guys, some of them were goddamn 12 year olds.

    I initially only played one character. A Spartan-II, one that specialized in Heavy Weapons and hauled around a big revolver. For the vast majority of that time, I just stuck with him, sticking him into threads where I thought I would do alright, y'know? Now, I was a bit young when I started this, so I wasn't sure how to handle certain things. I didn't write so well and the character was always a bit of a self-insert. I caught on to that pretty quickly and decided to tone him down for the most part. I liked to joke that he had more medals than the rest of the S-IIs combined, all of them being Purple Hearts.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)15:01 No.10692128
         File1277319664.png-(520 KB, 426x312, 1276483670578.png)
    520 KB

    Wrong person faggot try again next time.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)15:03 No.10692185
    Never actually seen a freeform rp in action. Got linked to a couple and never checked them out. But now I want to find some just to play an Oscar. That is a fucking awesome character.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)15:04 No.10692211

    A couple other members had some reeeeal shitty characters, though. The S-IIs that fought for the Rebels always bugged me, but they were usually just minor annoyances. One of the members had a... Unique character. A Secessionist, as I recall. Commanded a Reb fleet. A huge one. One that was capable of going toe to toe with most UNSC fleets. He reasoned that the Rebs would have a couple planets, and his guy was in charge of the faction, so he set the planets over to churning out ships and various other bits of military gear. There was a plan to counter everything that was thrown at him. S-IIs had to deal with Rebel S-IIs, Marines tangled with well equipped, well trained rebels, who were equal, if not superior in number. Fleets were blasted out of the sky by S-MAC guns, nukes, or the Rebel fleet. The character in charge was absurd as well. He was infected by a genetically engineered strain of the Flood. This granted him, as I recall, agility on par with an armored S-II, possibly better. He wore a cloak that granted him active camo and a pair of Energy Swords that were modified to have unlimited energy, with the fail safes turned off. It also gave him a healing ability that was utterly absurd. I seem to recall him 'dying' numerous times, only to get better. Might've had a few other abilities, I don't exactly recall.

    One of the other users was about as bad as he was and tried to nuke the guys fleet before I joined up. The fleet was ruined, but the character survived, somehow.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)15:05 No.10692222

    Ah dudes you have to give me some better shit than that. This thread has inspired me to go have a horrible RP experience. Can you give me an actual forum to go to thats slightly good?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)15:06 No.10692249
    >He was infected by a genetically engineered strain of the Flood
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)15:15 No.10692456

    http://forum.rpg.net/index.php ....enjoy.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)15:17 No.10692505
    Yeah, I don't know, man, it was something like that. He used that shit for a while, then the head mod started flipping her shit and got the boot by the head admin, who took over. He told some of the guys to shape up their characters, nerfed the Rebels, and a few other things.

    My S-2 and that guy eventually had a run in with each other. Ended with my dude losing an arm and his dude taking a few revolver rounds to the chest. After he was kicked through a solid wall.

    He got better.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)15:21 No.10692593
    >Mangekyou Sharingan
    >fooled into thinking he had killed his best friend

    ok, i raged on that one
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)15:33 No.10692834
    Faggery is pretty standard where the sharingan is concerned. I mean, can you name two cool sharingan users?
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)16:04 No.10693458
    So yeah, time to tell /tg/ about how my life got turned upside-down, and I drove the DM of a Mary Sue campaign to "He Mad" status.

    So, long story short, a friend of mine has this forum I game with DnD on. He encourages people joining up and playing whatever, so long as you aren't a fucking retard or a jackass (And even if you are one, he'll generally let it slide provided you're amusing in some way.)

    God help us all, the day that "Mr. Twiki" joined. Having started up his own "DnD campaign", I soon realized that this man had no concept of how to play DnD besides all the pretty stats, and was- instead- running a very loose freeform campaign with pretty numbers to justify what he did.

    Whilst I could list the TERRIBLE things he did to DnD, I'll just sum it up in one fine example: A spellcaster could cast spells of level equivalent to their own. So a level 9 caster? Yeah, Balors and Shit. And the star PC (Who I have a strong inkling is his hambeast of a wife [Which I know because I saw the website she runs. She's an "author" that has several "Books" that I vomit when I look at].) was...my god.

    I joined the campaign a few pages in, as a steampunk character. Because fuck yeah, steampunk, right? Well, realizing this was a joke after reading through, I named him Alphonse Kapown. Little did I realize the ramifications of this.
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)16:09 No.10693562
    So when I originally got introduced (Randomly having been trapped in some weird magical mirror prison that was sealed with a puzzle. /Why/ he was in there is still a mystery to me, in lieu of him being assassinated), I was actually having a bit of fun. You know, trekking through these crazy ruins filled with broken pieces of Mechanika (As an Arcane Mechanic right out of Iron Kingdoms, the DM kind of went, OH MAN MAGICAL TECHNOLOGY? SO COOL! and incorporated it...for the worse, as I would find out). Blah blah blah, A Wild Dragon appears and eats one of the players, and...I get all giddy as Al Capone (I MEAN ALPHONSE KAPOWN) stumbles into a workshop laden with fancy tools.

    Did I mention that one of the "feats" my character took was Craft Mechanika...and that steam-powered armor is a very legitimate item? I cackle giddily to myself as I get to work building armor while the rest of the party-

    Stumbles into a magical portal randomly in the middle of a Japanese garden in the ancient steampunk laboratory? Aww, shit, this was where it began.
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)16:17 No.10693671
    AH! Here we go...I found the website of the DM's hambeast wife (Also who will be referred to from here-on-out as "Dragon Girl" for very obvious reasons).


    Now, as you read what this woman has written in horror, I will explain to you the events that took place as I was whipping up my badass Iron Man suit with the intent of slaying the black dragon. Why would he hunt the WILD DRAGON? Because it swooped in, ate /all/ of the steampunk parts he had gathered by that point (Which he was carrying by lugging around an old wooden chest), and then swooped back out in less than a single round. No attacks of opportunity, nothing. Just "It flies in and eats everything you spent the last few days gathering, and X inactive PC".

    Needless to say, I was slightly mad by this point, but decided to let shit slide. DM was otherwise chill, and he DID give me a workshop to build my armor in. So yeah, while I'm crafting my badass Iron Man suit, the rest of the party stumbles into a portal except for one other guy.

    Who fell into a trap like a retard, and ended up getting "Saved by a shadowy figure basked in white light". Said PC was a werewolf (With a human "natural" form) at this point in the campaign. Needless to say, my "Oh Fuck No" meter is getting pretty high up there at this point.
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)16:21 No.10693745
    So my guy finally finishes his armor, and I see the rest of the party has arrived in...Dah, Dah, Dah!

    The Dragon Kingdom. A place so terrifying that EVERY SINGLE PERSON in it was a Dragon. A full-blooded Dragon, or a Half-Dragon, or SOME form of Dragon. Except the PCs.

    Imminent rape expected, right? Wrong! Turns out the Dragon Kingdom is composed of Dragons of ALL colors, and ALL of the Dragons are good! Black dragons are Lawful Good. GREEN Dragons are Lawful Good. Chromatic and Metallic alike are la-de-da, loving, and completely accepting of the random PCs who just teleported not A MILE AWAY from their capital city (Which was apparently a bunch of closely-spaced super fortresses, one for each color of Dragon).

    When I read this, my reaction can best be summed up as "Wut?". I mean, here the party was attacked by a dragon not SIX HOURS AGO, and suddenly they're being led in hand-in-hand by an entire nation composed of gigantic scaled behemoths whose best racial description is, "Don't piss them off if you value the lives of yourself and your loved ones".

    If you think this is bad, it gets better.
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)16:31 No.10693886
    So the PCs are taken into the Dragon Kingdom, given expensive clothing to fix up their attire, served hand-and-foot effectively by the Dragons...

    And all the while, their wounded companion "At the brink of death" (With about 5 HP left) is operated on by the Dragons. What to they do?

    They surgically implant scales along his body to "speed the healing process", artificially making him a half-dragon.

    That's right. An artificially added Half-Dragon template. My bowels rose into my throat as I saw the Human-Werewolf-Half-Dragon gladly leap into his new, freakish existence. By this time, Alphonse Kapown had stumbled upon the magical portal, and was making last-minute preparations before jumping through to the "Great Unknown".

    Dragon Girl enters at this point as the party gets introduced to the "King of the Dragons" and his daughter.

    Dragon Girl.

    My mind is filled with fuck at this point as HWHD (Which is a lot easier than writing "Human-Werewolf-Half-Dragon") begins to test out his new abilities.

    Which include wingless flight (Basically flying around like Peter Fucking Pan the Furfag) and a fucking ridiculous fire breath attack (Like 19d6 the DM said, though at this point I had pretty much completely ignored the guise of DnD this game used).
    >> Bad Newbie !u8dVJyyGAs 06/23/10(Wed)16:32 No.10693915
         File1277325171.jpg-(35 KB, 377x527, Trollan.jpg)
    35 KB
    The year is 1997, and Bad Newbie is a young, unashamed weeaboo in the primeval soup of the internets.

    >find a place to RP
    >full of vampires
    >DARK ELF VAMPIRE named Drizzt.
    >faggots RPing as the four horsemen

    Instead of leaving, I decide this is a fine place
    >throw my retarded animu shit around
    >no-one bothers to complain
    >my face
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)16:39 No.10694007
    So Alphonse Kapown arrives around the time the Dragon King and his PC daughter (Who, as I later found out with seething rage, was level 10 when we were all level 4. And had access to 9th level spells, as per the DM's "view" of magic in DnD. Oh, an Epic spells, too).

    So when my guy arrives, the King divulges that they're in an epic war against the Human kingdom. Part of me is like, "FUCK YES! We're getting out of Mary Sue territory! Maybe."

    The other part knows what's coming, and dreads it.

    "The Dark Empire", as the King of the Dragons divulges, is a species of "Foul, black-hearted humans" who use "Unnatural science" to fight the peace-loving Dragons after they arrived from "Another world" via an "Experiment gone awry".

    I'm amazed my head didn't rocket off my shoulders as I read this bullshit, and my character- seeing the GIANT CITY of fucking dragons flying around and one of his former companions looking like goddamn Frankenstein as he flew around the air- heads for the hills at full steam.

    Of course, the half-dragon sentries at the nearby castle see the man in steam-powered armor running away and alert Dragon Girl, who sends HWHD out to "Take out the Dark Empire spy!"

    Because obviously, a spy is going to be wearing noisy powered armor.

    Deep in enemy territory.

    And be a human in a kingdom of dragons.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)16:39 No.10694021

    I have never read anything so completely retarded in my entire life.

    Honestly, the minute we entered the friendly dragon kingdom I would have said something like, "I immediately commit suicide from stupidity overload."

    Wouldn't have failed that will save, either.
    >> Hojou Sounn !!liSXS3ubWZA 06/23/10(Wed)16:40 No.10694040
         File1277325649.jpg-(50 KB, 420x370, wat2.jpg)
    50 KB

    Bitches be dumb, yo.
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)16:42 No.10694079
    So after BARELY avoiding his homicidal ex-companion, he flees for the nearest signs of civilization, finding that the "Lost art" of Mechanika wasn't so lost. He makes his way in a fairly cool fashion around by fixing up farm equipment for people in exchange for board and food, and shit is actually pretty chill as he tries to make sense of all the insanity going on.

    Campaign seems to have a faint glimmer of hope.

    I was foolish for trying to follow that glimmer. Heading to the nearest city with the friendly directions of the farmers I helped, I arrive to find everybody ELSE walking around in powered armor. Which...isn't that bad, but I realized something.

    Everybody else wearing powered armor is a goddamn Orc. No human soldiers. AT ALL.

    I'm kind of cocking an eyebrow at this. Why the fuck would you give Orcs powered armor, especially since they're too goddamn stupid to otherwise operate it without being babysat?
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)16:46 No.10694135
    Just you wait. It gets better.

    So he eventually winds up at the cliche "Mayor's Home", which is really code for "Future Site of the Kapown Imperial Palace". See, I'm a tenacious motherfucker- if a DM wants me to suck the cocks of his Mary Sues, I fight back tooth and nail. And with steampunk?

    Yeah, I stood a good chance against dragons, especially since- at that time- I was bringing some fellow fa/tg/uys into the fold. By the time I got to meet the mayor, "Party B" consisted of a Khorne Berserker, "Fullblade" the unholy close-hitter, and a "Mage" that had a keen interest in uncovering necromancy.

    So, I meet the mayor. Or rather, the "Baron".

    And find out his last name is Kapown.

    He is my grandson.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)16:47 No.10694175
    No.10694135 etc

    oh god, this sounds both win and horrible at the same time
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)16:52 No.10694263
    At this point my brain reached "Fuck capacity". I mean, suddenly my guy has a grandson.

    Who, after a bit of conversation, I easily find out is siding with the "Rebel Alliance". I tactfully decide not to commit infanticide at this point by NOT asking what else consists of this alliance (Because I know a goddamn railroad when I see the tracks closing in).

    Instead, I smile, nod to my fatass of a grandson, and tell him I need a laboratory workspace. He graciously provides a secret lab underneath the city, which is stocked with some "Six thousand barrels of fuel" and a shitton of powered armor and a few "Mechanika Dragons".

    Yes folks, that's right. Apparently the dragon that stole my stuff was, in fact, under the control of the Dark Emperor.

    Because Dragons can't do anything wrong, right?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)16:57 No.10694390
         File1277326667.jpg-(158 KB, 800x800, shiroichiban.jpg)
    158 KB
    I actually somehow got roped into moderating a freeform RPG forum. I was a poster there for over four years, and, though it's kind of arrogant for me to say this, my introduction to the forum through an old girlfriend was one of the first steps to making it a decent place to writefag. I became very high profile there and a lot of people wanted me to GM or make characters in their RPs, so that definitely fapped my e-peen.

    Since I really enjoy putting limits on my characters' powers and giving them an interesting backstory, as well as writing them as differently from myself as possible, I am confident in my ability not to make a Mary Sue. This wasn't always the case, but I got enough of a verbal beatdown back in the day that I changed my ways years before I joined the forum, and likewise other people followed my example.

    There have been many fun RPs such as ones based on Wild ARMS and Type Moon franchise settings, but I usually was only interested in playing original ones, since I'm not as comfortable making an original character in an established canon. I made many RP ideas that I'm particularly proud of there, and still wish I could find a mechanics-based system to replicate them with, such as a Steampunk aerial RPG based off the CAVE shooter Storm of Progear, and by extension, the very similar anime Last Exile. (Though I made the RP before I even knew about LE, it turned out to be very similar.)

    Being a TMfag myself, I was pretty involved in whatever Fate/Stay Night or Tsukihime stuff came up.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)16:59 No.10694428
         File1277326749.jpg-(208 KB, 800x708, saberandagrias.jpg)
    208 KB
    I still moderate there. The problem with our forum isn't that the posters are bad. Such writers do exist but they're usually hounded out by basically everyone, and if there are still around, they are in threads I don't moderate since they aren't breaking any rules and it's the GM's responsibility to kick bad players. The problem isn't that people post two sentence replies or make Mary Sues, but in fact that they are so used to not doing these things that the average post reply in each thread has ballooned to almost a page of text at times. This is really tiring and draining on the creative brain, as you can imagine, and a lot of players have moved on to pen and paper systems, or just stopped RPing, because it was too much effort to be fun anymore. I want to make it more active and exciting again for people, so I encourage them to make *smaller* posts, something I couldn't have imagined doing when I first joined.
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)17:00 No.10694458
    It COULD have been win. It really could have. But my grandson was an appeasing faggot who had no idea how to even BEGIN to operate steampunk machinery, and was a fucking politician to top it off.

    I cured him of his stupidity soon enough, however.

    As Alphonse Kapown made his list of demands necessary, Baron-Grandson looked at me cockeyed. I wanted him to have the guards send down all of the piss from the latrines, all the lye from the kitchens, and all the silver they can spare.

    "But we need the silver to pay for reparations after the war is over with!" Grandson-Faggot informs me.

    The fucking little defeatist wanted to give the DRAGONS reparations after the Rebellion (Inevitably) succeeded! That sealed his fate in my eyes, and the scientist-grandfather simply nodded and smiled, "Of course," He appeased, "But any silver you can spare would be gladly appreciated!"

    So I get a few silver bars, a couple thousand gallons of piss, and casks of lye. The DM is baffled at what I have planned, but I have the potters create massive rings of fired clay with fluted edges. The DM is still baffled, and I can only smile as my plan comes to a head.

    The DM, seeing this, decides to intervene.

    The Dark Emperor and his army appear on our front doorstep. As I found out before, Human warriors have been replaced by Orc mercenaries- which, naturally, are gigantic fuckups and inept money-guzzling power drains with advanced technology.

    The "Baron", my fuckup of a grandson, pretty much demands we flee into the woods since we've- apparently- been discovered. Doubtlessly this had NOTHING to do with the fact that the Dragon Kingdom was, even now, preparing to march off for an invasion (With Dragon Girl and Party A serving as a "Scouting group").
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:01 No.10694469
    When I was 13 I roleplayed an Ankylosaur on the (Now defunct) Jurassic Park roleplay forums. I pushed over a jeep and then ate some grass. this took me 4 posts about a paragraph each.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:07 No.10694593
    Hey, that sounds pretty cool.

    For my experience, I was probably the bad thing that happened in a Naruto Freeform (forgive my faggotry).
    I had been playing lots of Resident Evil 4 Mercenaries mini-game with HUNK as my best character (lol, grenade spams and neck breakers!) so I basically made a ninja based off of him.
    The guy was basically a bloodline killer, since a lot of fans either made Uchiha or Hyuuga, or some ripoff of it, this guy tended to be loaded down with Tear Gas bombs and Flash Bombs (he wore a gas mask, they clearly exist in the Naruto universe), and later picked up some bombs made with hallucinogenics that he would use to made his weak genjutsu into something more more competitive. (And hard to break out of)
    So in summary, he was born to kill mary sue and then the radio crackled and said: "No, you are the mary sue." and then he was a pretty boy.
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)17:08 No.10694613
    Knowing rails to serving the Dragons when I see them, Alphonse Kapown grabs something from his work-bench before telling his grandson, the Baron, that they will not be fleeing. He tells him that he has developed something to win "The war", and- being the fat little motherfucker he is- my grandson decides that this means overthrowing the Dark Emperor and making peace with the cocksucking dragons.

    Al will have none of this, and just tells him to have the army prepare to hold the line, where my buddies thoroughly assimilated into the game pretty much single-handedly win the battle. Why? Because the DM was wise to what I had in mind, and made all of the NPCs working for me retarded (As he later admits in the glorious finale).

    At the time, however, he instead demands to know what I have planned to win the battle. I link him to this:
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:10 No.10694658
    Myyearbook forums are a cesspool for the shit... But from there I met some folk and grew into good tabletop DnD. Thank god.
    I remember this one kid from myb though... Sexually depraved and thought that made is ok for his character to graphically rape (god-mod-ing rape.) Every female character in the forum. It upset this one chick so bad that her boyfriend decided to go see him and kick his ass. That part wasn't so bad I guess.
    >> Hojou Sounn !!liSXS3ubWZA 06/23/10(Wed)17:12 No.10694707
         File1277327523.jpg-(288 KB, 650x492, shitgotreal.jpg)
    288 KB
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:14 No.10694778

    I cannot into science, all I can work out you've done is make disinfectant.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:16 No.10694804
    I once tried to DM a fantasy Esque freeform RP, but with Pokemon as the characters. Things went Okay, several characters were OKAY. This one guy had a character who was related to the Arch Mage, but wasn't sueish about it and made it interesting, so I approved that.
    Theeeen came the bad part.
    This one guy with TERRIBLE grammer came in with the whole "Oh my family died I'm ansty, ect." bullcrap. He caught a disease, even though he never came in contact with a carrier of it, without my premission. Acted like he was the savior of all and was an overpowered mage to boot. I eventualy told the other guys I was quiting cause of his idiocy and dropped the RP. Needless to say, the other guys RAGED at him. Not WAAAAAHHHH angsty rage but "what the fuck man!?" Rage.

    I came in contact with the other guys reicently, and might try and start it up again... PRIVATELY.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:17 No.10694838
         File1277327851.jpg-(17 KB, 512x384, 1277302229786.jpg)
    17 KB
    Disinfectant is cool.
    I guess.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:18 No.10694862
    >Why the fuck would you give Orcs powered armor, especially since they're too goddamn stupid to otherwise operate it without being babysat?

    See: Mega-armored Nobz.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:18 No.10694871
         File1277327938.jpg-(74 KB, 350x502, CUE111.jpg)
    74 KB
    It's not that bad. Even though I said I dislike making original characters in canon settings, that really only applies to canon I care about. Stuff like Bleach and Naruto is fair game.
    In my own forum I didn't do much, but I did visit other RP boards on request from some of my members. One had a large, extremely verbose crossover RP section which was basically just a very disorganized, vaguely defined modern setting filled with superpowered canon and mary sues who went around fighting each other and causing mayhem. I always disliked the lack of structure, but people seemed to have fun so I humored them.

    As requested, I made a Bleach character (I hadn't forseen ever doing this again as the last time I enjoyed Bleach was in early highschool years ago.) and he wasn't particularly original, but I played fast and loose with the rules of the setting. The basis of the character was Yoshitora Tokugawa from Samurai Shodown. He had memories from his life as a member of the Taira clan of samurai, which no Shinigami generally exhibits in Bleach because that would give them character depth. Like Yoshitora he was a playboy with many concubines, who followed him into Soul Society when he died, due to a "rushed Soul Burial" ritual. As a result, he got fused with his hos.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:19 No.10694895

    Maybe the plan was to bring medical science to the world and make himself far too useful to the dragons to be killed? Or introduce bacteria to the dragon's food\water source that can easily be treated with the silver nitrate?


    I got nothing.
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)17:20 No.10694917
    Rage is had by the DM, but he eventually buckles under powerful browbeating on the fact that I was using real-world science to fight science.

    The result? I invented Daisy Cutters in the quasi-medieval era. The massive battle was swiftly won with a minimum of losses on my own side (Though the DM decided to be a bitch regardless and have "random disasters" like chlorine gas randomly pop up in my city).

    Yeah. My city. That object Alphonse Kapown grabbed from his workdesk? A hand-held harpoon launcher. For the greater good of mankind, he murdered his own grandson, shooting him in the back of the head.

    He played it off as an assassin's work after the battle, using one of the countless dead enemy soldiers and trussing it up like a servant of the Baron. Being the "direct ascendant" of the deceased, he takes the Barony over, though the DM doesn't let me rule over anything more than the city itself. Which is alright.

    Why? Because I have big plans.
    >> MangoSangria 06/23/10(Wed)17:22 No.10694955
         File1277328153.gif-(13 KB, 100x100, 1223861113291.gif)
    13 KB
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:23 No.10694970
    >silver nitrate is used to prepare some silver-based explosives, such as the fulminate, azide, or acetylide, through a precipitation reaction.

    Giant bombs that can be detonated by water.
    You can do all manner of things with this.
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)17:24 No.10694980
    WHOOPS! Shit...I linked to one of the ELEMENTS of the final product.

    Silver Azide was what I meant. When ammonia and lye and silver are mixed...yeah...enjoy your improvised TNT.
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)17:25 No.10695011
    Yeah, but these weren't Orky Orcs- they were Tolkein Orcs. With the HNNGH HNNGH, ME AM TORR, ME SMASH. When you put something practically retarded in a complex piece of machinery...it's not going to end well. At all.


    I quickly set into motion, with malicious glee, a massive series of overhauls. The ridiculously massive stockpile of fuel is drudged up, suits of powered armor distributed amongst the militia and fierce training regimens enacted. Remembering the ancient facility he started off in, Alphonse leads an expedition there, and manages to loot a fair amount (And the place was, of course, in the Dragon Kingom- but he actually becomes a bit clever by this point. He takes samples of the drakeling-things they encounter in the wild).

    The DM can only watch in horror as I calculate the total income of the city. That's right, gentlemen, I calculated- by hand- the total income and expenditures of an ENTIRE CITY, manually enacted cost-effective rationing laws that STILL made it possible for peasant's to each get three square meals of wine and cheese a day, and came out with over 100,000 GP income a month.

    The DM's facade of trying to reign me back in finally cracked when, as massive factories for powered armor and rifles and ammunition were being erected, I detailed to him exactly how I intended to create Dark Matter.

    See, the DM had me encounter this crazy inventor when I became the Baron. Basically the guy invented a device that could open a planar "portal". He doubtlessly meant for it to be discovered by the "scouting group" now closing in on my city.

    I instead used it to recreate the Planar Engine from the Airships book. Which is basically an antimatter reactor that works by combining motes of matter from the Positive and Negative planes and harnessing the result.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:26 No.10695017
         File1277328376.gif-(102 KB, 603x234, yoshitora-hugewave.gif)
    102 KB
    I even went as far as to simulate the fighting game's limits on his moves, as he has 7 swords, one with a special move assigned to each and named after a flower, which shares a name with one of his six girlfriends. However, the last sword represents himself, a huge nodachi that unleashes a very overpowered special move. Once you land all 6 of the normal specials, the 7th is unlocked and it's basically your victory.

    So I decided to limit him to only drawing a new sword with a specific ability once per forum post, just to add to his swagger. Considering the length of posts on this forum, that meant that a battle had to drag on for an inordinate amount of time before he could use his cheapest weapon. 90% of the time I didn't even fight with him, since I tired of that place quickly and didn't post much. I just mostly had him swagger around getting drunk and flirting, shirking his duties, teasing the canon and original Bleach characters who took themselves too seriously, and laughing in general at the nonsensical nature of Soul Society government in the setting. It was sort of mean spirited, now that I think about it.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:30 No.10695107
         File1277328619.jpg-(375 KB, 900x1200, yoshitora-z.jpg)
    375 KB
    Oh, and I guess this was obvious, but each of the souls of his girlfriends split off into a different sword. He didn't actually think at all in combat; he just randomly grabbed a sword and due to subconscious influence by his concubine spirits in the zanpakutou, it'd turn out that he'd grabbed just the right one for that situation.

    His hair was also the center of a lot of jokes.
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)17:32 No.10695155
    The Dragon Kingdom's scouting party WALKS into the fucking city. An anthromorphic dragon girl, a fucking werewolf with dragon scale, and odd-man-out a regular human. By this point, Dragon Girl and Half-Dragon-Werewolf-Man had become "lovers" after a "wild night of passion".

    Yeah. Furfaggotry abounds.

    And, of course, this scout party discovered "by chance" the crazy inventor's house and his mad scrawlings. They deciphered from this that he was building that portal kerjigger, and JUST how it worked.

    How a bunch of fucking Dragons can understand the "evil science" of Humans is beyond me. But fuck it, I had grabbed this campaign by the testicles with steampunk, and it was time I made my point clear to the Dragons about JUST what I had in mind for their bullshit.

    So when my right-hand man, Fullblade, bumped into the party he quickly called for the city guard. A dozen HUMANS in powered armor quickly showed up, armed with delicious rifles (With ACTUAL rifling).

    Baron Alphonse Kapown meets the "race-traitors" and their "harlot leader" in the city's main Inn. Why? Because not only does it provide an informal atmosphere, but it drags them across the city, letting them see the massive factories being built, letting them see the schools that HE had built with HIS science to teach orphan children from the battle, to show them that mankind does not NEED the help of these scaled sons of bitches to prosper, contrary to what so many people think. Undead laborers made it possible for the still-living citizens to have lives of luxury, former hovels and mud-huts being converted into homes and even a smattering of mansions.

    At this point, Party B is gathered together, and I can't help but smile at how I had made my team claw its way up from the very pits of "Mary Sue stepping stones" to actual, physical threats.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:34 No.10695210
         File1277328892.jpg-(20 KB, 500x375, 1277302398896.jpg)
    20 KB
    Gad damn it. I'm genuinely engaged, here.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:35 No.10695237
    On the subject of Star Wars: The guy was some sort of super special Force-powered albino Twi'lek who was really strong, really fast, and really skilled with telekinesis and energy blasts. Also, impervious to energy weapons (read: everything worth a damn in Star Wars). True, he could be hurt by physical weapons, assuming they could hit him (faster than a speeding bullet, etc), and the person using them wasn't a Force sensitive that he could just feed off of instantly. Also had an annoying "I DID WHAT I HAD TO DO" way of justifying things in order to convince himself he was an utter badass instead of just a lazy sociopath. Was somehow convinced that his character was not a Sue despite clocking in at 100 on the test. Eventually joined a game full of other sues like the super special princess of a super special world of paramount importance to the Republic despite not actually producing anything since it was an idealistic agrarian monarcy who was like Palpatine's niece and married to the not-quite-evil Anakin Skywalker and had lots of babies and long-winded purple prose posts. The game also had reincarnations of long-dead Sith Lords with super tragic lost loves that convinced them to take the middle road for ULTIMATE POWER.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:36 No.10695247

    This is good, this is really good...
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:37 No.10695274
         File1277329037.jpg-(73 KB, 600x530, bueno.jpg)
    73 KB
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:37 No.10695285
         File1277329063.jpg-(52 KB, 512x384, DoubleFacepalmRickerPicard.jpg)
    52 KB
    Seriously Alphonse Kapown your shit is hella boring. What is that like 4 posts of some boring shit? I mean the other stories were funny, yours is just tl;dr.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:40 No.10695331
    Myself and several others would have to disagree with your assessment, good sir.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:40 No.10695335
    I find this story rather entertaining. I believe an agree to disagree is in order.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:40 No.10695339
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:40 No.10695342
         File1277329251.jpg-(39 KB, 600x330, 1245605759517.jpg)
    39 KB
    Quiet, 'tard. The man's telling a story.
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)17:41 No.10695357
    Party A:
    Dragon Girl, a Bronze Dragon in "Human" form with access to Epic-level spells and "custom-made" 9th level and below magic.
    Human-Werewolf-Half-Dragon, with the power of wingless flight and super fire breath and, TA-DA, the hand-to-hand skills only a Monk can wield.
    An "Elf Princess" that, though she started out as my ally, her PC dropped out due to real-life issues. The DM quickly made her part of "Party A".
    And four "regular" Dragons that would provide escorts to the group.

    Party B? We were self-made gods of men!
    Myself, Alphonse Kapown: Steampunk scientist who was wearing a suit of badass powered armor, which he had constantly upgraded to that point, including a pistol and that magical portal-making device he was working on modifying at the time.
    Fullblade: A Fighter that I also equipped in powered armor...but with a TWEEST! I invented a rocket launcher for him. A wrist-mounted rocket launcher, which he wielded in addition to his Fullblade (Which I remade into something akin to the Super-Sledge from Fallout, only with a vibrating edge in place of PNEUMATIC ACTION!). I had also incorporated organs from dragons we slew, granting him fucking ridiculous regenerative abilities.
    Khrone Berserker: He was a mutated son of a bitch, and my god could he rip and tear with the best of them. He actually destroyed his Drow servants when they failed to bring him skulls to ornament himself with.
    The Mage: Basically a necromancer by this point, I equipped his bony ass with a special version of powered armor that let him manifest his spells through his two apprentices, as well as amplifying the effects of his spell (Basically utilizing Rune Plates from Iron Kingdoms to make his entire suit FILTHY RICH with magic).
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:41 No.10695369
         File1277329310.jpg-(69 KB, 480x366, 1277124978592.jpg)
    69 KB

    Well it turns out you and your "4 others" are a bunch of faggots, so your opinions don't matter anyway.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:43 No.10695417
         File1277329428.jpg-(36 KB, 717x430, 1259140663895.jpg)
    36 KB

    Samefagging samefag.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:43 No.10695422
    Why do you have a machine to determine whether or not someone is a fag...

    Unless its for determining who you might fuck?
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:44 No.10695437
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:44 No.10695444
    Hah! Not bad.
    Reminds me of a Bleach BESM campaign my brother wanted to hold.
    The character I made was basically kind of comic relief.
    His name was Akira Kurosawa (my brother missed the reference by a mile and thought I was making a shout out to Fatal Frame) and his thing was that his spirit energy levels were so piss-poor pathetic, NO ONE him half the time, except for Kenpachi where it was supposed to be a running joke that the captain would always mistake the guy for a gnat or some other bug and try to squash him.
    But Akira's zanpakuto was seemingly to be a knife with a long handle, in truth, the rest of the blade was invisible and basically kind of a black-hole blade.
    I was never able to get him rolled, but one of the other jokes, since I would have joined the party late, was that he had always been there, but no one noticed him.
    Also, back in Academy he had a foot long pompadour with muttonchop sideburns.

    Thinking about it, a lot of my BESM characters quickly turn ridiculous.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:45 No.10695449
         File1277329503.jpg-(75 KB, 400x800, 1276359047509.jpg)
    75 KB

    Hey faggot shut the fuck up the man is telling a story of epic proportions.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:45 No.10695453
    >Samefagging samefag.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:47 No.10695518
         File1277329644.jpg-(14 KB, 200x333, pic.php..jpg)
    14 KB
    Fuck yeah. Pompadours and other forward-pointing hair *clearly* should make your Flash Step quicker by cutting through the air in front of you.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:47 No.10695521
    The closest I ever came to an rpg forum was receiving a request to take over as Shikamaru in a Naruto forum. The person who mailed me liked a fanfic I wrote about him - and because other people were always trying to turn the forum into a cesspit of cheap yaoi fantasies.

    I declined, (I had no experience with forum rpgs) but upon reading this thread, I regret my decision.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:47 No.10695527
         File1277329663.jpg-(40 KB, 562x437, 1277020278189.jpg)
    40 KB

    Sorry fag but the first one was me, the second one wasn't. Try again faggot.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:48 No.10695545
    Damn it guys shut up. I'm reading the story, it's not great and it's very long winded but I've got nothing better to do right now. It's good enough for me to kill a few more minutes and that's all I ask, now shush.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:49 No.10695584
         File1277329771.jpg-(21 KB, 350x350, 1274600885044.jpg)
    21 KB

    You fucking idiot how can we "shut up" if were not making any noise? I think you're hearing shit you fucking freak. You stupid shit go kill yourself for the betterment of mankind.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:51 No.10695641
         File1277329913.jpg-(38 KB, 640x480, summer.jpg)
    38 KB
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:52 No.10695646
    Just ignore the summer crowd. Hopefully they will lose interest and go away since this thread is in autosage.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:53 No.10695688
         File1277330028.jpg-(6 KB, 251x233, 1276450841953.jpg)
    6 KB
    oh look, more faggots who blames everything on summer.
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)17:54 No.10695711
    Well hey, you're welcome to your own opinion man- if you don't want to deal with the story, you're more than welcome to, you know, not read.


    When they walked in, I knew they were had from the moment they entered. The DM knew it too- I was too devious a bastard NOT to have a dozen backup plans in place (Really, I didn't have THAT many, but I had already known how the battle would pan out).

    The "talk" goes about as well as expected. The Dragonfags basically all chant, "You're evil! You just want to rule!"

    Which is true- Alphonse Kapown was a man who saw that his people had become too stupid to rule themselves. He was the only one with intellect and knowledge enough to save a culture that, thanks to the Dark Emperor (Who somehow survived the Daisy Cutter bombardment, surprise surprise), was essentially swirling down the shitter.

    He keeps his cool throughout this until Dragon Girl says the stupidest thing she possibly can.

    "You're just making your people miserable! I have one million gold in my Bag of Holding here, a gift from my father. Please, if not for your own sake, then for the sake of your people!"

    Alphonse Kapown, with the fury of a small god, rises from his seat.

    And bitchslaps Dragon Girl right across the face.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)17:56 No.10695751
         File1277330182.jpg-(65 KB, 800x600, 1256651051627.jpg)
    65 KB
    You go Alphonse!
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)18:00 No.10695864
    The STR contest was, needless to say, horribly skewed in her favor. But it was the effect of the action- Alphonse losing his cool, his weathered face rife with anger as he screamed at the princess before him.

    "Miserable? Miserable, you stupid cunt?! I am the only person here who has worked to /help/ my race! I am not my grandson, who would bend my race to your draconian whims! I am a Human, and I- like any strong man- would rather suffer famine, war, and illness than being your slave but for /one day/!"

    The respective parties gear up for battle as Alphonse continues, Fullblade readying his rocket launcher for close-range rape as Khorne Boy starts working up a froth.

    "I have persevered through ignorance! I have fought against the yoke your kind would put upon us all in the name of some mockery of 'happiness'! And now you come here, after I have built us up from ashes, seeking to try and buy your way into the hearts of my people?"

    He then spits in her face, "This is what I think of your generosity, whore!"

    DM goes critical rage at this point, and declares that the Dragons change shape into their full form, causing the roof of the Inn to fly off. He also declares that the Elf princess produces a copy of the portal device and says,

    "I know what I must do to stop this tyrant!"

    Dragon Princess and her lover-toy fly off into the air as the Elf, without so much as a single reaction roll or anything, smashes the device into the floor of the Inn.

    Blowing all of Party B to smitherines in a "mushroom cloud of magic". Party A escapes unscathed from the ruins of the city.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)18:01 No.10695879

    Take a look at


    This is the same kind of pedantic trolling you might pull on your sister when you're a kid, holding your hand barely an inch away from her going "BUT I'M NOT TOOOOOOUCHING YOOOOOU" while she tells you to piss off.

    It's summer faggotry, silly bored teens with time off school acting like silly bored teens. If nothing else an attempt to troll would have addressed the subject at hand, something like "but why waste your time with a shitty story?"

    Instead the attack was on the wording. Sinking as low as a gamefaqs forum troll.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)18:05 No.10695954
         File1277330712.jpg-(70 KB, 357x303, armpitsaregoingto.jpg)
    70 KB
    You got GM raped. Feels bad man.
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)18:05 No.10695964

    DM then posts a bitchfit of a thread saying that Several players have been removed from the DAM RPG. The story line they are wanting to follow and have been allowed to follow is not a line of this particular story that I can pursue any longer. It is not what I was prepared to DM in this story nor is it what I am willing to continue with. I hope all the players that have been dropped understand this and find other games in which the characters they wish to pursue will fit better."

    And then he has the thread locked.

    I do not stand for this shit. My friend, who is the admin of the forum, unlocks the thread on my behalf. Being a fellow fa/tg/uy, said admin- upon hearing this tale- "Unlock on account of LOL!"

    I truly wish I could present to you the full glory of the shitstorm that followed. I told him every awful rip I had been holding back- Everything from jokes about his wife the "White Whale", to the fact that HE had allowed things to reach this point.

    The result? He tells me he's going to hunt me down and "tear out your throat and shit down your neck".

    I cackle and post a quick "U Mad?" image.

    His rage only magnifies.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)18:05 No.10695965
         File1277330735.jpg-(52 KB, 640x480, VILE DOESN'T LIKE IT.jpg)
    52 KB
    I suppose I will regale my own tale here.

    We played a Super Robot Wars RP. Being a huge fan of the series, it was great to finally get into a large PR about it. It was set after Super Robot Wars @3. Being beginners, we didn't know how large of a problem this posed for one reason; the series list is huge as fuck, and all of the plots are finished. Which means we'd have to make up our own. I don't even know where to start, so I'll just make a list of the fuck ups
    -Characters Being the first RP most of us had been in, not many people know how to write GOOD characters. Characters act like asstards and go unpunished despite the crew supposed to be a somewhat disciplined military
    -Character powers: Too many people have characters will ill explained powers and abilities, and often they were made up on the fucking spot. Surround a guy 6 on one, and he'll suddenly become a newtype and blast your ass out of the sky
    -Character's mecha: Not only do we have people attempting to one up each other, we've got a grossly overpowered cast, shit like channeling Getter Rays into Gundams, it's just a mess
    -The plot. Despite the fact that most of the plot should be finished and we should be treading new ground, we just fight old enemies and old stories in a ill-explained story. The whole door is opened for SRW OG to get in, so it becomes a gigantic mess
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)18:07 No.10696008
         File1277330834.png-(149 KB, 274x231, you can't be serious, dext(...).png)
    149 KB
    -The GM: Sure it's easy to blame him and him alone, but to say he didn't suck, I'd have to be lying. The first few stages consist of him telling everyone else what to do while saving the day in his overpowered robot
    _He got angry when an antagonist group was being portrayed outside of horrible monsters
    _He used his character and his ill-explained powers to stalk the character of a female player. Even when it's time for the character's plot, he forces his character in
    _His machine is overpowered, that none of the others can fight him, and he gets angry when no one wants to waste their time fight him
    _The plot is basically aroundabout way of saying that he's the most important character. Because whatever original plot we do have, it's about him. Whenever everyone fights a BIG BOSS, he always gets the dramatic speech with them and finishes them off.

    And that's the top of the barrel, my friends. I could do a play by play here, but it'd take fucking forever.
    Sadly, it's the only RP we've actually managed to fucking finish.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)18:12 No.10696100
         File1277331143.jpg-(24 KB, 302x319, rage2.jpg)
    24 KB
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)18:13 No.10696114
    Oh, no, I didn't get GM raped. See, even if I lost the battle, I won the war.


    I opened a conversation with this guy on MSN, and invited the Head Admin- my buddy- to the chat.

    I brought up the death threat he made on me, and provided a screencap. The admin, who doesn't really give a shit, was just going to give him a warning not to do that sort of stuff again on the forum (Terms of Service for the host more than him actually caring).

    The DM, thinking he's going to be in deep shit, goes full-on rant mode.

    "the [Game I just got booted from] is made up fantasy.. JUST like the "rule" books you refer too... it is all the exact same thing - a bunch of made up BS concocted by people with too much imagination and not enough life. Have fun in a different game."

    The head admin is an AVID fan of 3.5.

    He reads this, deletes what he says. His neckbeard isn't quite fa/tg/uy worthy, but this guy basically just said that DnD was pretty much a worthless pile of bullshit, even though it's a pretty goddamn big business.

    I simply sit back as the head admin, realizing JUST how much of a flaming faggot this guy really is, tears his ass in half.

    DM posts a "I am seeking greener pastures" post the next morning.

    His game dies with the hero Alphonse Kapown.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)18:16 No.10696173
         File1277331368.jpg-(18 KB, 244x320, manly_tears.jpg)
    18 KB
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)18:17 No.10696204
         File1277331434.jpg-(357 KB, 920x1243, 1275935134558.jpg)
    357 KB
    I think.. that Alphonse Kapown was the Emperor of Mankind somehow. If it would be a different world, he would lead the whole mankind to glory.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)18:17 No.10696212
    Let just start by saying that I joined Gaia Online when the site was scarcely two weeks old.

    It was, honestly, the general "anything goes" setting was actually a pretty cool place in the beginning. Yes, most of the population were Angel/Demon/Dragon/Elemental/Elves. But for every two of those there was at least one player who had a truly brilliant concept and knew what they were doing. I personally, after looking at the rediculous levels of power being thrown around, made myself an "eastern mysticism" monk character who specialized in sealing other peoples abilities.

    Good times were had. My character, a specialist in holistic medicine, mostly hung out in a sanctuary thread and spent my time patching up the other characters. This wound up being a great way to find good roleplayers, as the only people who needed healing were players who actually let themselves get hurt. Anyway, good times were had and long time friends were made, some of whom I still keep in touch with. However, I also made the mistake of including my then girlfriend in on the festivities, and as always Teh Drama snuck in and I took a break for several months. (cont.)
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)18:18 No.10696228

    Lets just add a "Rides off into the sunset and is never seen again." for good measure.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)18:19 No.10696269
         File1277331578.jpg-(38 KB, 600x480, Agents-are-GO!1.jpg)
    38 KB
    Fuck. Turned boring when the real-life drama started.
    >> Alphonse Kapown 06/23/10(Wed)18:24 No.10696375
    Yeah, I'll admit the real-life drama wasn't that fun, but it was great to troll those dragonkin motherfuckers to the point where their DM couldn't think of ANYTHING to stop me. I had literally bent his campaign such that the Dragonfags would lose.

    So he just threw the whole thing to the dogs and quit.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)18:29 No.10696492

    So, against my better judgement I come back months later and reintroduce my laid back doctor/monk guy to the world, looking to relive the good times. Instead I found that nearly all the cool people had disappeared, and that the Mary Sue population had apparently exploded. I did manage to find some pretty decent groups to roleplay with, but we all became more and more secluded and shut off from the general setting as the "veterans" from the old days continued to disappear one by one. Their threads replaced by increasing numbers of "Tennage Vampyre Club" threads.

    So, eventually, I decide to finally make my own RP. Having written off the general setting as mostly a loss beyond the one thread with my friends, what do I do? I make a goddamn Naruto RP. (cont.)
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)18:44 No.10696835

    Now, in my defense, Naruto lays a fantastic groundwork for making awesome and original characters. You can make a ninja with just about any possible schtick you want and justify how it works because "lol Chakra". The world has a fairly unique political system and society, especially when you decide to really push the fact that it's a world where pre-teens are forced into military service for no other reason than it's a family tradition.

    However, none of this seemed to matter. I received dozens of applications, and 90% of the characters were:
    1. The last surviving member of their clan, which made them bitter and filled with hate for the world.
    2. Either was an Uchiha, or had the sharingan for seemingly no reason, or otherwise had some sort of other wierd eye based power that was an I Win button.
    3. Had an original power that consisted of "i charge up my first with energy and charge the enemy, but it's totally not the chidori because it's fire/shadow/pudding/a different color."
    4. Possessed a demon beast that was 100x more powerful than the nine-tailed fox. Naturally with a drawback like "using it will kill my character", despite describing using it at every available opportunity.
    5. Had already reached Jounin level, spent time as the top dog of the ultra secret ninja corps that the regular secret ninja corps know nothing about for years, fought whoever the current "strongest character" in the series was to a standstill (if not having killed them outright), and passed on the offer to become the villages most powerful leader in history because they wanted to manipulate things from the shadows. All by the age of twelve.

    I eventually began the habit of simply returning applications with "FAIL" written in huge red letters with no other explanation.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)19:11 No.10697309
    bump for more golden stories of greatness
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)19:35 No.10697839
    Bump for awesomeness while I laugh hysterically at the Alphonse Kapown story.
    >> Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)19:48 No.10698139
    Bumpan for stories.

    Delete Post [File Only]
    Style [Yotsuba | Yotsuba B | Futaba | Burichan]