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  • File : 1262657508.jpg-(60 KB, 527x681, 1259703111405.jpg)
    60 KB Mage School Quest Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/04/10(Mon)21:11 No.7429980  
    Quest time, setting suggested by a couple of friends.

    --------------------------

    You are awoken by a musical crashing coming from down below, and instantly your absolute hatred for the students soars once more. Ever since you took the job of Administrator for The Grand Arcanum, one of the best mage schools in the country, your life has been atrocious. Daily your earlier career choice of fighter through and through earns you ridicule from the magically inclined students, their spells setting you on fire, whisking you unwilling around the corridors, changing the colour of your face. Every day they laugh at your archaic armour, regardless of the great beasts you've defeated before in battle. They know nothing of true honour and bravery, yet they mock you relentlessly.

    Not any more. In your decade of attendance to your post you've done your best to turn the school in to something you can be proud of - and it most certainly is. Traps line nearly every corridor, mechanical death machines rigged to trigger whenever you wish. No part of the school that you've visited is safe. Danger awaits round every corner in the manner of spikes, pit falls, trapped slimes, crushing walls. Some of the other teachers, under the impression it was for security, even helped you add magical traps, foolishly leaving the controls under your care.

    Leaving your bed, you spend a careful ten minutes putting on your ridiculously expensive yet practical armour, enchanted by the other teachers as far as possible. Looking at your wall, you ponder which of the vast myriad of weapons to choose, for today it starts.

    Today you wage war on the wizards, the sorcerors, the warlocks and even the damn bards. Today, you wage war on those damn students. You are Ulfgar Stonbrakkar Ravenhelm, and you are a damn Dwarf.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)21:17 No.7430056
    Pick up the spiked chain hanging on the door.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)21:21 No.7430116
    Order all the students into the gymnasium inside the anti-magic zone.

    You know, the one they have so they can't cheat at rope-climbing.
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/04/10(Mon)21:25 No.7430169
    >>7430056

    Turning towards your door, you select one of your more effective weapons, a stout chain leaden with spikes. At either end is a heavy weighted sphere, easily capable of caving in chests and skulls, let alone simply breaking bones even through armour. Hefting it in your hands you note with satisfaction that the runes etched in to it are as ever pristine, allowing you to throw the weapon a fair distance and call it back almost immediately.

    Looking around your room, you wonder if there's anything else you'd like to take with you just in case returning to the room becomes a problem. It's fairly fortified, with reinforced walls, floor and ceiling, as well as hosting a large number of locks on the single door leading in and out.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/04/10(Mon)21:28 No.7430211
    >>7430116

    You mutter ruefully to yourself about not being an actual teacher, otherwise you could simply request all of the students to attend a specific place, but unfortunately as an Administrator you only know the total population of the syudent body at five thousand, six hundred and thirty four, of varying degrees. There are also twenty three other teachers, all of magical lifestyles, and all of whom refused unanimously to put in place an anti-magic sphere, for fear of it being used against them.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)21:30 No.7430232
    >>7430211
    Shake my mailed fist in anger at their foresightedness!!!
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/04/10(Mon)21:40 No.7430363
    >>7430232

    With an impulse of anger, you shake your mailed fist generally at the air, cursing the mages for their foresight, and swearing by your ancestors that you will prevail against the school and students. As the angers fades in to a dull burning resolves, you decide against taking anything else from the room, as you're sure you can simply return later. Stepping forward, you disengage all the locks, leave your room and lock the door behind you, pleased as the clicks and slams coming from your door continues for several minutes after you remove the two keys.

    Looking down the stone hallway, you can see someone has turned part of the floor in to quicksand, no doubt leading to an uncomfortable fall to the floor below. Down the other end of the hall everything appears normal, though knowing this school, it probably isn't.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)21:40 No.7430370
    what if one of them can see the future ?
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/04/10(Mon)21:46 No.7430434
    >>7430370

    After taking another step forwards, you pause. Worryingly, it's a possibility that one of the students, or even a teacher, may be able to sense the future. However from what you know of such powers, and how often they can go wrong, it's probably best not to think about it. After all, you're a dwarf who has sworn to his ancestors that he will prevail. There will be no failure, prophets and predictions merely presenting another barrier that must be overcome.

    Plus, you find yourself reassured, you're a very good fighter, and everyone else in the building is merely good at magic. Surely you will prevail.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)21:48 No.7430456
    >>7430370
    Ever see Revenge of the Sith?
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/04/10(Mon)22:23 No.7430940
    From down below you can just about hear the occasional scream from a student who didn't quite cast properly, and as you watch the quicksand in the floor not far from you slowly grows teeth, fairly randomly, throughout the sand. It's clear by now that it's a usual day, and it probably won't be long till the normal mid-morning explosion.

    Hefting your chain slightly, you know that it won't be long before a student wanders close, yet you've not fully committed to any sort of action yet, aside from to curb the students in a truly spectacular display of fighting skill.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)22:57 No.7431382
    This quest is too awesome to die

    but I don't have time to play it!
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:01 No.7431453
    >>7430940
    Head to the refectory and begin crafting the finest Dwarven Brew from our homelands.

    Offer a celebratory banquet that evening, and make sure that everyone gets a nice full mug of your ancestor's 250 proof ale.

    Then, that night, the humiliations begin.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:05 No.7431508
    >>7431453
    >>7430940
    Yes. Wait for nighttime, when students sleep.

    Are we killing the teachers as well?
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:07 No.7431534
    >>7431508
    No, we're lashing them together to form an agonized, weeping sculpture of flesh and blood, in the shape of an enormous hand with middle finder extended.

    The student corpses will be piled so as to spell out "FUCK MAGIC" when viewed from the air.
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/04/10(Mon)23:08 No.7431544
    >>7431453
    Carefully navigating the quicksand, you start to head downwards towards the refectory, a plan forming in your mind. Though it would take time to make, the nigh legendary Stonbrakkar mead would be incredibly well received by everyone in the school, and would no doubt act as an excellent incapacitant, not to mention any bodily harm caused by it's sheer potency. Thankfully you don't need to actually make any, since you have several hundred barrels of the mead stored away safely for your own personal use. Though almost an insult to your ancestors, serving it up will results in an end that justifies the means.

    As you reach the refectory you notice a puddle of remains that, judging from the robes plastered to the floor underneath, was a student. That's excellent, only five thousand, six hundred and thirty three at most left to go. There doesn't appear to be any other students around, so you quickly make your way to the main bulletin board on a wall and take the stylus, quickly setting out the time for the banquet tonight, as well as listing the promise of finally unleashing the mead that has been asked for every year you've worked here. If that doesn't draw everyone, nothing will.

    Almost immediately names start listing themselves next to your notice, as students and teachers sign against the note that appears next to them.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:13 No.7431611
    >>7431544
    Start preparing for the banquet, of course!

    Get the chefs working, find some phony reason to host the banquet, etc.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:14 No.7431633
    >>7431611
    No need for a phony reason, we're announcing our retirement!
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:16 No.7431660
    >>7431611
    One vital part of the preparation is ensuring that the mead penetrates even the strongest magical defenses against inebriation.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:17 No.7431665
    >>7431633
    That works too
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:19 No.7431705
    >>7431660
    We should go kill any healers in the building.
    Any student with any knowledge of healing magic needs to be removed.

    Let us begin, unless the OP has left us.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:19 No.7431706
    >>7431611
    >>7431633

    You quickly add a reason to the notice, that the banquest, and more importantly the unleashing of your fabled mead, is due to not only your 10 year anniversary for working at the Grand Arcanum, but also for your retirement as Administrator, as you aim to forge a path out in to the world once more. Almost immediately the name flood in faster and faster, quickly spiralling in to the hundreds as the students eagerly sign up to bear witness to your last moments of employment. No doubt they'll try to play a few tricks.

    Off to the side is the staff notice board, and you pen a quick request to the cooks and events coordinators, who have already seen the banquet notice. Since they all use magic, much of it is set up already, and the cooking is already underway. Several affirmations come back, and now you know you're definitely comitted - the banquet is going ahead regardless of what happens. Now you can be sure of a good victory meal.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/04/10(Mon)23:21 No.7431729
    >>7431706

    Whoops, that's me. Also, 7431534 has style.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:24 No.7431763
    >>7431705
    I wish to suggest this again.
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/04/10(Mon)23:24 No.7431765
    >>7431660
    >>7431705

    Knowing the effect your mead can have, yet also knowing it's not technically lethal, you quickly write a notice requesting all those trained in the medicinal arts, be they magical or otherwise, to attend the refectory for briefing on how to combat the effects of the ale in order to prevent any 'accident's. Again you get a few confirmations, and it takes less than an hour before the hall is filled with all three hundred and four students and a single teacher. Most of the assembled are in fact Clerics.

    A few sudents make remarks about your dress, what with you currently in full war gear, but it seems to be generally assumed that this is usual, and the presence of a weapon is due to it being a special day.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:26 No.7431786
    >>7431765
    Take them one by one into a seprate room to 'test' them to see if they can help with these said 'accidents'.

    Murder them while they are in there. Be clean though, blood everywhere could cause this to end badly.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:27 No.7431799
    >>7431765

    Safety training for tonight's banquet:

    Get half of them to drink some mead with their defenses voluntarily down to give a true measure of the situation, then have half the rest of them take over drinking when the first batch is incapacitated.

    Continue this until there's only one cleric left standing.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:27 No.7431803
    >>7431765
    Teach them a method to combat the ale that will actually result in them appearing to explode into showers of fireworks and confetti.

    They'll be exploding for real, but the drunken students and teachers won't be able to figure that out.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:28 No.7431808
    >>7431786
    Ooh, I like that too.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:29 No.7431816
    >>7431729
    Yes, I most certainly do have style.

    But I also meant that as a serious post. That's going to be our retirement gift to the academy.

    After all, we take our craftsdwarfship seriously.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:31 No.7431836
    >>7431816
    Especially when our craft is murder.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:32 No.7431851
    >>7431799
    do what this man said
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:35 No.7431877
    >Traps line nearly every corridor
    Make this happen
    But you know... With actual traps
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:35 No.7431885
    once all bu one of the clerics are down take the last one away to discuss medical preperation for tonights event, kill him as quickly as possible, and then fill the room full of clericswith some sort of deadly substance. Gas, acid, or similar as they will be far to drunk to cast any defensive abjurations
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/04/10(Mon)23:35 No.7431886
    >>7431786
    >>7431799
    >>7431803

    "Right, basically to be able to treat those under the effects of the mead, you'll need to try it yourself first," you say slowly, "so yes, you'll all get an advance taste." At this pretty much everyone in the room starts talking animatedly with their peers, pleased and excited to be able to get a taste before anyone else. You explain to a couple of students where to get it, and moments later they've teleported back with a barrel, though they clearly look disappointed that they weren't able to open it themselves.

    Walking up to the barrel, you disengage the fourteen locks of dwarven manufacture (indeed your own) and carefully lift the lid. Instantly the whole hall is filled with a mellow golden light, and universally everyone inside the hall sighs in blissful pleasure. A single dwarfly tear of pride falls down your cheek as you look at the wondrous mixture.

    "Alright, line up. A single tankard each should suffice to show you the effects, and know now that at the banquest everyone is going to be drinking a hell of a lot more than a single tankard. Go ahead." you state, before taking a step back. After a few well meaning squabbles, a line forms and people start to take their tankards of the mead, happily drinking it.

    Sure enough, once everyone has downed their share, you only have to wait a few minutes before everyone is contentedly snoring in a mead-induced slumber. Should they wake up, their heads will not feel pleasant.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:36 No.7431904
    >>7431886
    They won't have heads to wake up with now, will they?
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:37 No.7431914
    3 words
    coup de grace
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:39 No.7431937
    >>7431904

    Wisdom.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:40 No.7431938
    kill them, and then overturn the barrell and set them on fire, to make it look like an accident caused by drunken roughousing with fire spells in the presence of dwarven ale
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:40 No.7431945
    >>7431938

    I like it.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:41 No.7431949
    >>7431886
    Take them all into a part of the cellar that had anti-magic protection on it to prevent them from teleporting in and stealing the booze.

    Use our Dwarven Crafting Skills to brick them all up in an airtight, magic-proof prison.

    Paint "Montresor was here!" on the new wall. In blood.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:41 No.7431957
    >>7431938
    The barrel should be fine. We can extract it from the ruins of this turd factory after we're done.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:41 No.7431958
    >>7431938
    Sir, are you MAD? Trying to ignite that much ale would be like setting off two-thousand kilotons of TNT. It would be suicide!
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:42 No.7431965
    >>7431958
    Dwarven ale, that is...
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:42 No.7431967
    >>7431949
    I don't think there's any anti-magic areas in the school.

    Stupid foresighted wizards.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:44 No.7431993
    >>7431886
    Are there any known BBEGs on the loose that we could pin this on?
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:45 No.7432015
    >>7431958
    is you are correct then we simply craft a device capable of striking a spark feom flint, set it on a clockwork timer of reliablr dwarven make and " take one last walk around the grounds, to remember the place by"
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:46 No.7432026
    >>7432015
    *from and reliable, jesus I can't type tonight
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/04/10(Mon)23:46 No.7432035
    >>lots

    After a moment of thinking, you go to tip the barrel to douse all of the slumbering people with the mead in order to set them aflame, before you stop. Such an act would be hideously offensive to not only yourself but your ancestors, so you spend a productive twenty minutes proceeding to the wine cellar, getting some paltry human ale, and rolling it back up to the refectory.

    Naturally everyone is still asleep, so you tip the badly made barrel over, then set them all alight. Your ale is so potent that even as they burn to death they continue to sleep, and as such there are no screams to alert anyone else. It's not too long before the fire burns itself out on the stone floor, no fuel left to sustain it. All that remains of the three hundred and four students and a single teacher are ashes and some bones.

    Five thousand, three hundred and twenty nine at most left to go, with none skilled in magical healing or otherwise.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:50 No.7432083
    >>7431967
    If there weren't any anti-magic protections at all, they'd have teleported in and stolen our ale years ago.

    It's just that an anti-magic wine cellar isn't normally a threat.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:51 No.7432092
    >>7432035
    Time to see the cooks about adding some of your famous dinner mead to the stock pots.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:51 No.7432106
    we need to convene a teachers meeting at once, in the teachers lounge of course. which we have hopefully stuffed so full of traps it would make Gygax himself weep. and treat them to a taste test of the ale
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:52 No.7432108
    >>7432083
    Stealing our ale does no good because they couldn't get the barrel open anyway.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:53 No.7432123
    >>7432035
    Commence with dusting. Retain the bones for use as supports in our planned sculpture.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:53 No.7432124
    >>7432106
    once they are nice and drunk, set off the traps

    this only works if we've had the foresight to trap the lounge that is.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:56 No.7432174
    find the head of the sorcerors and them the head of the wizard insulted his manhood, that should keep things nice and chaotic until dinner, maybe even thin out the herd a bit.
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:57 No.7432192
    I really like the premise of this quest.
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/04/10(Mon)23:57 No.7432194
    >>7432083
    >>7432092
    >>7432106
    >>7432108

    You reflect to yourself that sealing your ale in a vault several cities away was a great idea, since it's technically easy to get if you don't mind waiting a while. At any rate you look at the charred remains for a bit, figure it's unlikely they'll provoke much comment after being swept in to a single pile, and go back to the staff noticeboard.

    After making a note requesting all the teachers convene at the communal staff loungt for a special taste test, you quickly rush there to make sure all the traps are primed. Naturally when you get there all the teachers are waiting, having teleported. Even so, a few glances are all you need to reassure yourself that the spikes, flamethrowers, poison darts, collapsing floor, falling ceiling, several giant stone spheres, stasis traps, cloudkill variants, black puddings and several Mindflayer-summons are all functional.

    Gesturing to the nearest teacher, you palm them the location of your mead and they gleefully flicker, reappearing with a barrel next to them.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Anonymous 01/04/10(Mon)23:58 No.7432205
    >>7432194
    Climb onto the nearest table and perform a goatse.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:00 No.7432232
    Climb onto the nearest table and perform a toast.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:01 No.7432235
    >>7432194

    DRINK!

    DRINK AND BURN, ASSHATS!

    BWAHAHAHA!
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:01 No.7432236
    I like all this advance tasting stuff. By the time the feast arrives, our work will be done and we'll have an entire feast with dwarven ale to ourselves. And maybe the nonmagical cooking/cleaning staff.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:03 No.7432272
    >>7432194
    Toast them with the following:

    "To lives free from worry, to deaths free from sorrow, to celebrating each moment as if it were our last! Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we may die!"

    Then ale, then trigger the traps as we walk out.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:05 No.7432294
    toast to their health, weath, and good fortune and the tell them you have some dwarfy pre retirement ritual to go about but they are welcome to finish off this barrel, so long as they make it to dinner, make sure they all have at least some ale and then leave the room and set off the traps, if any survive feign outrage that some student thought it would be funny to set off you traps and insist in helping them investigate before you go
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:08 No.7432338
    >>7432205
    I do this. I stretch my butthole until it tears.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:08 No.7432343
    Give them no mead. Tell them to wait just a moment while you take it outside to undo the "very very ancient and secret" dwarven locking mechanism.

    Then, traps.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:11 No.7432380
    >>7432343
    as muchas I hate to waste good dwarven ale, these are high level spellcasters. the ale is nessisary to throw them off their game.
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/05/10(Tue)00:13 No.7432415
    >>lots

    Stepping up on to a table, you carefully undo the locks on the barrel and kick the lid off, bathing the room in golden light. One of the teachers actually quietly states, in awe, "It's not even magical...." and sighs contentedly. You take a tankard from your belt and fill it from the barrel, causing all eleven of the remaining teachers to sit forwards.

    "To lives free from worry, to deaths free from sorrow, to celebrating each moment as if it were our last! Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we may die!" you toast, raising the tankard before downing the mead in one. It tastes wonderful, as it damn well should. Gesturing to the mead, you say kindly, "Drink as much as you like, and see just how good the Stonbrakkar mead is."

    Eagerly the teachers rush forwards and start drinking, a look of complete happiness crossing each face before it plunges in to unconsciousness. One teacher however, is still awake in the corner and looking at you suspiciously. The tankard of mead is largely untouched, a single small sip his only indulgence. You know this to be Freden Ghal, a constant irritation who considers you to be of an inferior race.

    (cont)
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/05/10(Tue)00:14 No.7432428
    >>7432415

    As he goes to stand, you quickly press a button on your belt and the whole room springs to life, several darts hitting Freden by sheer chance, before you bolt from the door. You hear his screetch of "What in the name of-" before it's cut out by the agonised screams of three enraged and grievously maimed Illithids, and the rumble of the stone spheres, collapsing floor and decending ceiling.

    You just about manage to slam the door shut on Freden's hand and hear his scream of pain as the ceiling and Illithids end up ripping it off, and his cries are quickly silenced, though the noise coming from the room is impressive. Casually locking the door with the locks you placed there yourself, you're fairly sure enough of their bodily remains will be left to form a statue when the traps have reset in an hour.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:18 No.7432497
    Weep for the potential loss of the rest of the barrel.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:25 No.7432582
    >>7432497
    A SINGLE DRAWRVENLY TEAR
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:25 No.7432592
    I wish to feel the blood of these mages on my weapon directly now.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:26 No.7432599
    we need a count of the remaining students, and a breakdown of how many of them are powerful enough to be a danger to us.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:27 No.7432610
    >>7432582
    Then we save that tear, because it's a vital part of the starter for proper Dwarven Ale.
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/05/10(Tue)00:32 No.7432691
    >>7432497
    >>7432582
    >>7432592
    >>7432599

    You know that after the demise of the entire teaching council, there's at most five thousand, three hundred and twenty nine students left. Of those, probably half are likely to be a viable threat with their magic, though the remainder could easily cause interruptions or bad scenarios.

    As you look at the locked door, you almost shed a single dwarvenly tear for your barrel of mead, before reason asserts itself - you know for a fact that the barrels are harder than stone, and as such the barrel would merely have been pushed in to and through the foor, or the decending ceiling. The mead is absolutely safe.

    So far no alarm has been raide, and the remaining students are all looking forward to a banquet that's scheduled to take place in seven hours. Your spiked chain has yet to taste blood.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:33 No.7432706
    >>7432599
    in addition I would like to request an inventory of what we have in the banquet hall, as far as traps are concerned
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/05/10(Tue)00:33 No.7432710
    >>7432691

    floor and raised - my apologies for the spelling errors.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:35 No.7432729
    >>7432706
    specifically is it enough to take all of the remaining student body out in one swoop
    because if it's not then the culling must begin
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:35 No.7432740
    >>7432691
    The Council of teachers has been called away for a very important meeting of the magic powers in the region, and unfourtunately miss the banquet.

    But never fear, as your administrator I am qualified to watch you all and keep things orderly and quiet.

    Curfew will still be the same time, and any hijinks will be reported to the Teaching staff upon their re-arrival.

    But enough with the rules, tonight is a celebration! Drink and be merry!
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:37 No.7432762
    This. Must. Not. Die.

    As for what to do...
    What traps do we have set in the dining hall? How many, what variants? Pillers supporting the ceiling that are collapsible by a press of a button? Hidden pitfalls under the main walkway? Pointy things that hurt?
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:41 No.7432811
    >>7432740

    Implying the teaching staff will be gone for a lengthy amount of time might inspire some of the more rambunctious students to act up.

    We should tell them the teachers won't be coming back until late after the national magical threat is dealt with.
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/05/10(Tue)00:43 No.7432848
    >>lots

    Thinking of the banquet hall itself, you review in your mind the traps that you've set there. The whole ceiling is rigged to transmute in to highly corrosive acid at the same time as the fifty supporting pillar explode in to sharp flying shrapnel. Several pit falls are located on the floor, specifically clustering around the entrances and exits. Some of the pit falls house gelatenous cubes that you've kept fed with odds and ends for years and as such are healthy, and many of the chairs and tables are Mimics you have subdued by threat of absolute violence and ruin, hidden by auras that specifically register as non-magical.

    The walls are completely festooned with mechanical crossbows, flamethrowers and poison gas chambers, and indeed several containers of cloudkill are housed around the ceiling, triggered to go off when no longer contained by a solid source. The four fireplaces house summoning circles placed there are great personal expense, tied to no doubt unwilling greater Archons of Hell via their personal name runes, also obtained at great expense.

    Even with all this, it's likely that a tenth of the remaining student population will be able to teleport away and start some highly disturbing counter attacks.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:48 No.7432931
    We should walk the halls a bit.

    Stretch our stubby legs. Maybe we'll find a student on his/her lonesome.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:51 No.7432968
    >>7432848
    Convert some of our mead to aerosol form and liberally fill the banquet hall with it.

    The instant they breath in, they start getting drunk, and even if they don't actively take any mead they'll just keep getting drunker as the banquet continues.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:53 No.7432996
    wait for the party, and once it starts gather all the students sround the aleand challenge them to a drinking contest, with the winner gettting to decide on the last "amusing little prank" they get to pull on you. Is any of them can best you in a drinking contest you will dye your beard the color of their choosing and keep it that way the rest of your days. any man caught cheating is immedietly disqualified and the person who discovers thier cheating gets to sit out the next two tankards. once all they are all either passed out or DQed make sure the DQed ones are at least passingly drunk themselves and leave to pack. then set off the traps once the doors are locked behind you.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:54 No.7433013
    >>7432968
    I... like this idea.
    I also think a walk would do us some good. Possibly...teaching...a few of the more...troublesome... students a ...lesson...if we happen to see them in the halls.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)00:54 No.7433026
    >>7432996
    oh and I sincerely apologize for the horror my sleep deprived brain calls "spelling"
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/05/10(Tue)01:01 No.7433093
    >>lots

    After a few moments you casually make your way to the banquet hall. On the way you meet a single student who goes to make a joke at your appearance only to find a heavy metal sphere making contact with his face. It's the work of a moment to tip the body in to a vat of acid hidden in a wall, and aside from that quick fight you reach the banquet hall unscathed, to find the pile of ashes and bones still untouched, and your barrel of mead.

    You quickly work with the barrel and store it in a wall, causing the mead to be misted in to the air at regular intervals, infusing the large room with a lovely smell. Being prudent, you put out the four fires in the room, and leave a note on the board that they're not to be turned on till an hour in to the banquet itself.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:02 No.7433109
    >>7432996
    I will restate this.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:03 No.7433121
    >>7433093
    Sip mead and watch. Timeskip to trap deployment.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:10 No.7433223
    >>7433121

    This and some stretching.

    No point in pulling anything should the face smashing get heavy.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:13 No.7433261
    I like the idea of a drinking contest and the aerosol. But I think we need another backup, just to be safe. There are after all 5329 students that are going to be there.

    Do we have anything anti-magic in our room, perhaps? We love our chain, but a backup, anti-mage weapon would be nice. Preferably something with range.
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/05/10(Tue)01:17 No.7433329
    >>7432996
    >>7433121

    As the evening approaches, you sigh contentedly as you're quite full of mead, having supped it whilst waiting for the time to pass. Eventually you see the cooks come and set out the tables, swaying slightly with happy smiles as they weave their way out of the hall. Soon enough, the massive chamber fills with students, the overall level of noise incredibly loud as they all talk and joke together.

    Standing, you walk to the teacher's table at the head of the hall and stand on it, raising your hands for silence. It takes a few minutes, but as the mead in the air takes effect, the noise gradually stops. "I challenge you all!" you state, "To a drinking contest! Whoever can outdrink me with the legendary Stonbrakkar mead can alter my appearance as they see fit, and I swear by my ancestors to adopt the change until the day I die. Who here rises to the challenge, allowing themselves an unlimited amount of mead?"

    Not surprisingly, everyone in the hall seems to agree, and before long everyone is downing the ale with no real regard towards you. It's mildly painful to be going through so many barrels, but you feel it was prudent that over half the barrels used were simply taken from the wine stores, bolstered by pure ethanol taken from the alchemists' wing of the school.

    (cont)
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/05/10(Tue)01:17 No.7433333
    >>7433329

    After several minutes, it appears that everyone is completely asleep. Smiling to yourself, you leave the hall and carefully turn the fires on from outside, and next to you the door is blown off the hinges as the stone walls quake from the bast. Inside the room you hear all the traps going off one after the other, and feel satisfied that your job is done, only to notice the small attendance sign next to the blackened doorway.

    Five thousand, three hundred and thirteen students were in attendance. That means a whole fifteen did not show up, yet their names were listed next to the sign in board. The blast and sound of the traps no doubt shook the entire building, and now it seems like the fifteen most powerful students, almost equal to their teachers if not actually at that standard, have escapsed your blazing wrath.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:19 No.7433372
    >>7433333
    well with the fire we need those 15 bodies "intact" for our statue, so we cant do anything to drastic.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:20 No.7433378
    >>7433333
    Set myself up at the center of my labyrinth of death. My own personal tomb of horrors. Make sure to offer them some ice cream from the statue's mouth if they survive the gauntlet to get to me. It tastes like pure annihilation, you see.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:20 No.7433380
    >>7433333
    And here I was sad about us being done.

    Activate all traps throughout the rest of the school. All lights should be extinguished. Stalk through the halls and strike from the darkness.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:22 No.7433422
    is there any reason to suspect that we caused the explosion and not one of the incredibly drunken magic users in the presicne of dwarven ale? if not, then we return to our room and begin packing, if so we return to our room and take stoke of any wepons therin.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:24 No.7433451
    >>7433380
    yes, for security purposes the all lights should be put out, or at least as many as we can manage.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:26 No.7433478
    >>7433333

    Go back to my room and pull the Doom Lever, arming all the traps in the school and activating the "Fuck the World!" device's charging sequence.

    Sit back with a cool drink and see if they can find me before it finishes arming.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:27 No.7433488
    >>7433333

    What do we know about these students?
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:27 No.7433491
    >>7433451
    and of course all the "security measures" should be activated, at once, just to be safe.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:27 No.7433493
    >>7433380

    Nice pick, but a little pansy to me.

    We should find some good anti-magic armor or barring that wands.

    Kill the wizard, with ye mind!
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:28 No.7433507
    we need a breakdown of the students left.
    exactly what are their skills?
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/05/10(Tue)01:29 No.7433527
    >>lots

    Though nothing explicitly points towards you as the reason for the explosion, a gut feeling makes you think those fifteen didn't turn up for a reason, and they must have signed that they were coming simply to delude you. You quickly make your way back to your own room, deftly bypassing the quicksand with teeth that's still there, and quickly bolt the door and lock it behind you.

    A quick flip of a switch on the wall and all the lights in the building are extinguished, or at least the ones you've 'maintained for security reasons' in your years at the school. It's likely that ove nine tenths of the castle is now in darkness. Flipping another master switch, every single trap in the building starts to execute, and you know that for the next half an hour, the very building itself is a death trap, almost as dengerous to you as it is to anyone else within the massive building.

    Looking around, you once more have access to all your belongings.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:30 No.7433546
    >>7433478

    Ye thought I'd actually tell ya mah plan if there was any chance ya could stop it?

    I armed the device 30 minutes ago.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:37 No.7433697
    >>7433527
    Ok, first, activate and put on all my anti scrying gear. I don't want my next actions generating any premonitions.

    Next disengage the safety locks and prime the Device, but do not activate it yet! I want enough time to make it to the minimum safe distance after the traps stop.

    Pack up all my goods into my bags of holding. Ready all my speed boosting items. Get ready to pull the lever as the traps stop and RUN.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:38 No.7433721
    what do we have on hand to disrupt spellcasting?

    What do we have that could disuade them from simply teleporting in all at once and nuking us.


    ... do we have access to a gelatinous cube here, preferably one that fits to the dimensions of the room exactly, and if so could we remove all the belonings we want to keep from the room and place the cube inside so as to fill the room, obviously hiding in whatever sort of bunker we have preapred.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:39 No.7433742
    but if we use the devise we won't get to make the statue
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:40 No.7433760
    >>7433697
    I agree with the anti scrying gear, anything that protects against divination is key right now
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/05/10(Tue)01:45 No.7433840
    >>7433697
    >>7433721

    You take a small amulet from your desk and slot it in to place within your helmet before placing it back on your head. Safe in the knowledge that you now completely register as non-magical and also untraceable via magical means, you survey the room. It's reasonably sized, though too big for a 'cube to fill it, and capturing one now that they're nearly all lose would be a tad difficult.

    The only likely thing at the moment preventing the fifteen teleporting in is that only the teachers specifically knew where your office was, kept it shielded and periodically moved it to random locations in the school at your request, meaning it'd be highly unlikely for students to locate the room.

    Though it would have been nice to have a master device to reduce the school to rubble, the master switch was essentially your final solution, so in an hour when the traps run out it will take another hour for everything to reset before the switch can be pulled again. Unfortunately you have no way to track any students that are left, so are unsure as to how many have been caught in the trap bonanza.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:45 No.7433860
    >>7433742
    The statue's already taken care of, it's under the school now. All that's left is peeling the school off it.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:49 No.7433911
    >>7433840
    We wait until the traps are done. Getting killed by the doomsday device isn't a priority.

    Meanwhile, let's set up our room to prevent someone from teleporting in invisibly. Either fling a bunch of flour/dust particles into the air and watch for disturbances, or put flour on the floor and wires going from wall to wall, back and forth, to catch anyone popping in.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)01:55 No.7434008
    >>7433840
    What? a trap bonaza's all fine and good, but do you mean to tell me we forgot to make a "fuck the world!" device? I wallow in a brief moment of disapointment in myself before I continue.

    Presumably we know the names of the potential survivors, and have access to their student files? I say we frame them for the whole thing.

    Think: what will the other magic users believe?

    1 Secret cabal of 15 powerful magic users destroys school as part of dark plan.

    2 Non magic using administrator (a clerk!) successfully wipes out entire teaching staff and over 90% of the student body.

    Idealy if two or three have powerfull and oposed parents the ensuing scandal will spark yet farther destruction. (what! obviously my son was dominated and yours was the ringleader!)
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)02:00 No.7434084
    >>7434008
    this is good, but then we don't get to kill the uppity magic using pansies
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/05/10(Tue)02:03 No.7434166
    >>7433911
    >>7434008

    As the traps continuously go off outside your room and throughout the building, you rig up a network of steel cable and sprinkle a thick layer of iron filings on the floor on the off chance someone does teleport inside your room. Though you've not made a doomsday device, you're still please that you've wiped out the entire teaching council and 99.734% of the student body. That's pretty good for a spur of the moment decision this morning.

    From your wall you unlock what appears to be a small slate, and plug in a tiny crystal from your desk. Immediately it lights up, and you key in the security code for the notice boards, revealing the names of the fifteen students presumably still alive. From the looks of their files, most of the students had scholarships, with only a few having any parents of note. More worryingly, the three with notable parents were children of select teachers you killed earlier.

    - What would you like to do, Administrator? -
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)02:04 No.7434186
    >>7434084
    You're looking at it the wrong way.

    We agree to hunt down those 15 missing students as "atonement for our failure", and get the entire rest of the nation behind us in our quest, both figuratively and with actual monetary and physical support. Inside, we have a trollface the size of the fucking Great Wheel on the entire time.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)02:05 No.7434192
    >>7434084

    This is true, but if they kill themselves off alot more will be dead than we could manage.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)02:08 No.7434247
    then we have to get out of here once the traps are off and get to the nearest ruling body (king, emperor, what have you) and tell him of the horrors these evil students wrought.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)02:10 No.7434282
    >>7434166
    Wait, I never made a doomsday device. Use someone else's. Surely there's some magical device here that fits the bill with minimal modification.

    Really: isn't "creating dangerous things that really shouldn't exist" a fairly accurate description of the non-teaching duties of the professors?
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/05/10(Tue)02:25 No.7434509
    >>lots

    By the time you've finished packing the best of your posessions and selecting a couple of weapons, the traps have finally stopped. Carefully you open your door, and through the devastation of the hallway you see no sign of life. The closest things resembling it is what appears to be a rapidly evaporating puddle, the remnants of a gelatenous cube caught in the traps.

    You quickly make your way out of the building as best you can and, to your satisfaction and interest, note the corpses of seven students on the way. As the building is constructed to be beguiling and as such is quite winding, those seven are probably the only ones caught in the building's last moments. Though you've naturally not check everywhere, eight students are probably still alive.

    As you exit the building you note it's now very much night time, but with your goggles which enhance your vision you can clearly see a great distance even without your natural night vision. It's not too long a trip, but eventually you reach Castellis Maloriceen, home of the local ruler of the kingdom, King Maloriceen of Hlallenheim.

    (cont)
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)02:26 No.7434531
    >>7434186
    >>7434247
    It's going to look suspicious that we made it out unharmed. We may need to stick an arm into an open fire or something similar to feign injury from the surviving students.
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/05/10(Tue)02:28 No.7434547
         File1262676480.jpg-(184 KB, 700x988, MORTIFY.700px.jpg)
    184 KB
    >>7434509

    An argument with the guards later and you're thankfully granted an audience with the King himself, at which point you describe how a select cabal of students went insane in the castle and destroyed it utterly and are now at large. The King, an old friend considering you saved the kingdom from several monsters before your Administrator role, pledges all the access to the armoury you wish, as well as the use of any and all of the Royal Army to hunt them down.

    You even have the help of Illandis Briarthage, the Court Mage you (grudgingly) befriended after he saved your life previously.

    There are eight students left to hunt down and destroy, and then your ancestors will be content. Just eight individuals to go.

    ----------------------------------------

    At that point as this has been going on for over seven hours I'll call it there, but rest assured I'll start this again in the evening to hunt down those last pesky mages! Thanks to everyone for participating.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)02:29 No.7434571
    >>7434547
    That's good, because now it's gone from Mage School Quest to Mage Hunt Quest.

    I'm looking forward to it, this was cool.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)02:30 No.7434588
    >>7434547

    My pleasure. You've got a dwarfy way with words.
    >> Geckilian !/OGGmup3lA 01/05/10(Tue)02:30 No.7434602
    Also as a side point - if this thread is still actually alive when I start it again in the evening, I'll just continue here. Feel free to discuss plans and resources to use to hunt down those last eight mages.

    From what you gathered in their student files, each one has a specialty - transmutation, illusion, evocation, fire, force, necromancy, domination and teleportation. Have fun whilst I'm gone /tg/.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)02:33 No.7434657
    Take care OP.

    To /tg/: We'll probably have to plan this one more carefully. Unlike the school, which had all our traps prepared ahead of time just waiting for execution, we'll be on neutral ground at best, with powerful mages who aren't going to be taken by surprise this time around.

    At least we have a massive amount of resources at our disposal.
    >> Thannak 01/05/10(Tue)02:40 No.7434763
    >- What would you like to do, Administrator? -

    1) Fall in love with jailbait witch.
    2) Learn some goddamn magic.
    3) Open a martial arts class teaching magical aptitude through physical discipline.
    4) Announce the school now teaches a mixture of physical and magical study.
    5) Retire with a now 18 year old magic babe.
    6) Profit.
    7) ?????????? (To be continued...)
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)02:41 No.7434772
    Fucking incredible.

    http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/7429980/

    Thread is archived here.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)02:45 No.7434841
    >>7434763
    You... didn't read this thread at all, did you
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)02:45 No.7434842
    >>7434763
    We are a dwarf, we need no magic. As seen by our recent exploits.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)02:55 No.7434986
    >>7434841
    >>7434842
    WTFareyouthinkingmind.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)04:05 No.7435710
    So how should we hunt the mages then? Any ideas?
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)04:16 No.7435813
    >>7434842
    Still, jailbait witch does sound nice...maybe if she can grow herself a beard, hehehe...
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)05:04 No.7436201
    >Group we work with is horrible to us, we betray them. Now we hunt down the remainder.

    Sounds like that Evil Scientist quest.
    >> Anonymous 01/05/10(Tue)06:55 No.7436964
    >>7435813
    NOW you're thinking dwarfy!



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