Susan the DickRipper

rolled 4, 6, 5 = 15

Olaf Whistleaxe.

Max Fightmaster.

Magnus von Magnussen

DESTRUCTOR.

>Odin
>Rage

You can kindly fuck off. The god your looking for is Thor—Odin was a more hateful/controlled god.

Todd.

Just Todd

Wolfbatman.

Maximus Powerfisty Fuckbuster III

Edjer Sharplundd

>>8108352
THIS NAME IS FUCKING RETARDED!
>>8108365
Fucking whatever. Your name is Olaf Whistleaxe! From fucking now on any command must be proceeded with 'OW'! Now what the fuck do you do next?!

Khorne Hole.

The name is the source of your rage, for several reasons.

Mick Marathon

OW I KICK THAT SON OF A CUNT OCEAN

>>8108482

GET SOME FUCKING WENCHES, ASSHAT.

>>8108414
Odin was a god of battle as well. I say whatever, and I love Norse myth.

>>8108482

Olaf Whistleaxe FIGHTS THE OCEAN WITH THE RAGE OF A THOUSAND SUNS

>>8108519
"FUCKING OCEAN!"

You let that massive body of water know who's the meanest son of a bitch in these parts!

Don't forget you need to fucking go see the village chief asshat or do! It's your fucking life! Do what you fucking want!

>>8108676

OW WELL NOW THAT THE FUCKING WATER HAS LEARNED ITS LESSON I GO TO SEE THE HEAD CUNT RAG

>>8108676
OW:
Find some followers.
RIP AND TEAR TO ESTABLISH BADASSITY

>>8108705
You fucking tear some serious ass from the beach back towards your piece of shit village! Fucking spring thaw! Fucking grass! You find yourself reflecting on how this extra water is going to make it's way to the ocean and only grow more angry.

As you make you very unmerry way back to the village, you think you see someone in your fucking way! Are you going to let whoever the fuck that is in front of you get away with this bullshit?!

>>8108858
OW:
What the fuck. You can't go around kicking shit like a damned youngster. Aren't you coming of age today?

>>8108858

OW MOTHERFUCKING FLYING JUMP KICK THEIR HEAD OFF

>>8108858
run so fast that you turn into a laser and vaporize the person in front of you

OW YOU NEED TO FUCKING FIND A MIDGET. SHIT ON HIS HEAD.

ow KNOCK THAT FUCKER DOWN AND TEABAG HIS FUCKING FACE!

>>8108877
The fuck does this have to do wi-

OH! It's that fucking bitch again! You've known her stupid ass since you were both young! She's your elder's grand daughter! Isn't that just fan-fucking-tastic?!

INSERT HER FUCKING NAME!!!

Helga Asshat

>>8108971
OW FUCKING OLGA IYOTSEV

Sherry Dorfthroat

Excellen Browning Ymir

OW
Cunty McDatAss

OW SLAVA FUCKING SVARTBADAR

OW GRETA OLGATA

OW
Its Dangerous to go alone
Take my Banjo

Cunty McCunty

>>8108995
YOU PISSANT MOTHERFUCKER! THAT'S NOT HER FUCKING NAME!
>>8109008
That's the correct fucking answer! Well don't you feel like the motherfucking all father figuring out that GREAT MYSTERY?!

"Gramps told me to hall your ass back to the mead hall. Somehow I knew you'd be staring down the sea again."

That massive cunt. ACTING LIKE SHE KNOWS YOU SO WELL!

>>8109222
OW: Fucking punch her in the face and tell her you'll go to the mead hall when you damn well feel like it

>>8109222
OW:
"Fucking amazing, lets go" *Slaps a bitch*

OW: FOLLOW THAT CUNT AND GET THIS SHIT DONE SO YOU CAN FIGHT THE SEA SOME MORE. FUCK!

>>8109222
OW I TELL HER TO GO SUCK EGGS WITH HER GRANDMA WHILE MEN TALK AND I GO LISTEN TO WHATEVER THAT OLD COOT HAS TO SAY!!

THIS BETTER BE GOOD

>>8109222
OW

TELL HER THAT IF SHE'D JUST SHOW ME HER TITS I MIGHT NOT HAVE TO STARE DOWN THE SEA SO GODDAMN MUCH

>>8109222
Cute, yet with a shit-eating grin that makes me want to strangle her.

I am torn ;_;

>>8109259
FUCK if you're going to let her boss your shit around just because she's the fucking village elder's granddaughter!

>>8109488
Olga takes 5 damage!

"The hell was that for?! To think I was going to give you a fucking present!"

>>8109609
OW: She taunts my rage. Fucking hit her again and demand my fucking present

OW: NOW WHAT THE FUCK DOES THE VILLAGE ELDER WANT GODDAMNIT!?

WHY ARE WE SHOUTING?

>>8109609
OW

THAT WAS FOR BECAUSE I FELT LIKE IT

YOU'RE MY CHILDHOOD FRIEND OR SOME SHIT

YOU SHOULD BE USED TO MY FISTLY SPASMS OF RAGE

NOW IF YOU GIVE ME THE PRESENT, I'LL SHOW YOU THE RAGE THAT'S MEANT TO BE USED IN PRIVATE

OW "I'M SORRY BITCH, BUT YOU WERE BEING A BITCH. I DIDN'T MEAN TO HURT YOU, EXCEPT I FUCKING DID. NOW LETS GET GOING"

>>8109801
OW "ALSO GIVE ME THE PRESENT NOW. OR DONT. FUCK IF I CARE"

>>8109633
You strike her again, giving her a black eye! Handing over the mysterious gift, she scowls. A fucking mushroom?!

"Don't. Fucking. Waste. It."
>>8109654
Olga folds her arms. "Go fucking ask him instead of me!" She storms off in a hurry to cover up the damage before you get in trouble... again.

>>8110036
Forgot the picture.

OW: FUCK THAT BITCH, HAUL ASS TO THE VILLAGE ELDER ANd FIGURE OUT WHAT THE HELL HE WANTS!

>>8110055

OW: In calmer moments reflect on your misogyny.

>>8110036
>>8110055
CONGRATULATIONS FUCK-NUT! YOU GAINED ONE RAGE-MUSHROOM. DON'T FUCKING EAT THIS UNLESS YOU WANT EVERYTHING AROUND YOU ABSOLUTELY DEAD!

>>8110110
OW WELL THATS FUCKING GREAT

TIME TO GIVE HER A FRIENDLY POSSIBLY PAINFUL PAT ON THE BACK

>>8110110
HOW THE FUCK IS OUR RAGE METER ONLY AT LEVEL 1.

>>8110140
OW ACTUALLY MAKE THAT "PROBABLY"

>>8110107
FUCK OFF OUR MISOGYNY IS AWESOME!!

someone need to learn their norse mythos a bit more and realise that odin was a bit more level headed and less rage inducing then he thinks he was

>>8110157

OW: FUCK NO! MISOGYNY IS WRONG! MISOGYNY MAKES YOU ANGRY! BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF THAT ASSHAT OLD MAN FOR NOT TELLING YOU WHAT HE WANTS!

>>8110181
You! This is why we can't have nice things! Just let this shit slide. At least it's decently done for once.

>>8110181

YEAH, YOU! PEOPLE GOING FUCKSHITASS CRAZY AND FIGHTING WITHOUT ARMOUR WERE WARRIORS OF ODIN FUCKHEAD. TYR WAS ALSO PRETTY COOL, BUT ODIN WAS THE FUCKING GREATEST ONE EYE BASTARD EVER

>>8110241

and to tastefully back up my point...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Berserker#Literary_references

>>8110080
You fucking charge through the side door to the mead hall (literally).
>>8110140
You make mental note to do so. AN ANGRY MENTAL NOTE.
>>8110149
You constantly simmer with rage! It is ALWAYS AT LEVEL 1! Obviously it'll get higher depending on the fucking situation.


Back to the fucking story!

"You do remember we have doors, don't you lad?"

Interrupting the fucking village elder being FUCKING OLD, what the fuck do you ask his ancient ass?

>>8110340
FUCKING BURST THROUGH THE DOOR AND TEAR HIS RIGHT ARM OFF FOR FUCKS SAKE

>>8110340

OW: Respectfully apologise, knock and then ask him what he needs.

OW I GRIND MY TEETH
REALLY
FUCKING
LOUD

>>8110385
What the FUCK!. Did breaking down the door give us brain damage? Since we are we a giant pussy!

>>8110429
Apparently, we pussied out in the front of oldness being old.

>>8110429
OW YOU FOOL! IF HE IS THE ELDER OF A VIKING VILLAGE, HE IS OBVIOUSLY THE ANGRIEST SON OF A BITCH THIS SIDE OF VALHALLA. WE DO NOT WANT TO PISS THIS FUCKER OFF, EVEN THOUGH HE'S OLD AS FUCK; FUCKER COULD PROBABLY SNAP US LIKE A TOOTHPICK.

Why don't we have an axe?

I love this thread.

>>8110460
BUT HE's OLD, AND WE'RE YOUNG AND ANGRY!!!
RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE!

rolled 94 = 94

>>8110340
OW: "GODDAMN YOU OLD MOTHER FUCKER, YOUR BEARD FILLS ME WITH RAGE! IT IS SO FULL AND GREY I AM GOING TO TEAR IT FROM YOUR WRINKLED FACE!"

>>8110498
SO IS PROFESSOR BADASS, BUT YOU DON'T FUCK WITH HIS ASS EITHER

>>8110385
CLOSE ENOUGH!

"You're a bit annoying at your age and obviously to impatient, so I'll skip the ceremony and just send you on your way."

"Huh?"

"Go fucking leave the village. Get on a boat, wagon or even just fucking walk. Do something that might impress me and the rest of the fucking villagers."

"Now?"

"Yes. Fucking now."

rolled 72 = 72

>>8110605
OW: FIND ME A FUCKING BOAT, STORM OFF TO THE DOCKS

>>8110605
WHAT THE FUCK DID I TELL YOU SHITHEADS

MOTHERFUCKING ELDER BADASS

>>8110605
OW FUCKING FINALLY! LETS GRAB A FUCKING WEAPON AND DITCH THIS SHITHOLE. TIME TO FUCK SHIT UP

>>8110605
OW:
Board up the door and burn the fucking place down.

Now force Olga to come. tell her your out for VENGANCE

>>8110605
OW : YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD IMPRESS THE OTHER VILLAGERS? IF I FUCKING RIPPED YOUR HEAD OFF AND MADE YOUR SKIN INTO A SATCHEL FOR THE KING OF FAGS

>>8110623
>find a boat
>BEFORE going to the Docks.

Did you think that through?

>>8110658
Fuck No! We're a Berserker, there's no need to think things through

>>8110605
TAKE OLGA ON YOUR SHOULDER WHETHER SHE WANTS IT OR NOT, UPROOT A TREE WITH YOUR FUCKING BARE HANDS TO MAKE A BOAT AND GO DO SOME MOTHERFUCKING GENOCIDE AND PILLAGING DAMMIT!

>>8110633
NO FUCKING WEAPONS! WE WILL CRUSH OUR ENEMIES WITH OUR BEAR HANDS!

>>8110749
You HAD to say it, eh.

>>8110623
YOU DON'T NEED TO FIND A FUCKING BOAT! THEY'RE AT THE DOCKS! SKIP STRAIGHT TO FUCKING CHARGING THE DOCKS! HOW FUCKING CONVENIENT THEY WOULD BE IN THE SAME PLACE!

OH SHIT! FUCKING SEEEEEEAAAAA!!!

>>8110717
OW I give my support to this awesome suggestion.

We should row the tree with the elder.

>>8110749
SHIT YOUR RIGHT! IF WE HAVE BEAR HANDS WHY WOULD WE NEED WEAPONS. THE CLAWS ARE ENOUGH

>>8110764
OW ABOUT WE FUCK THAT SEA

LET'S GO FIND US A FUCKING WORLD SNAKE AND BEAT ITS GODDAMN SHIT-EATING SKULL IN

AFTER WE GET A BOAT, OF COURSE

>>8110764
OW WE ALREADY SHOWED THAT FUCKING SEA WHO'S BOSS. LETS GET ON THE FUCKING BOAT ALREADY, PILLAGING AWAITS.

>>8110764
PREMADE BOATS ARE FOR PANSIES

>>8110764
OW
FUCK THE BOAT, RIDE THE DOCKS AFTER BREAKING IT AWAY WITH PURE RAGE

>>8110764
OW Use the boat as a weapon to destroy the elders house, just to do something to amaze the people as he demanded. He fucking deserves it for being an asshole.

OW FIND A MERMAID PUNCH A MERMAID FUCK A MERMAID LETS DOOOOOOOOOO THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSS

>>8110793
Truly, thou art a viking

>>8110157
OW FUCK NO MISOGYNY MAKES OUR CHANCES OF GETTING A GIRL TO PUT OUT DIE A HORRIBLE DEATH AND THEN ENTER THE NEGA-REALM IT IS THEREFORE THE EXACT OPPOSITE OF AWESOME

>>8110841
WE'RE A FUCKING VIKING. WE DON"T NEED A GIRL, DID YOU FORGOT ABOUT THE RAPE PART OF BURN,RAPE, AND PILLAGE

>>8110793
FUCK YEAH THIS

>>8110805
>use boat to destroy Elder's House
>Elder
>Elder God
>CTHULHU

IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW

EAT THAT FUCKING MUSHROOM THING, SHIT IS USELESS ANYWAY, FUCKING STUPID CUNTWENCH HELGA ASSHAT OR WHATEVER THE FUCK HER NAME IS

I love this thread and everyone in it. Compliments to the OP.

>>8110841
>NEGA-REALM
WE ARE A FUCKING VIKING! AS LONG AS WE DIE FIGHTING WE'LL GET TO VALHALLA!

>>8110916
But you're always fighti-- Ho, I get it.

>>8110866
BUT A PROPER VIKING GIRLFRIEND SHOULD RAPE RIGHT BACK

>>8110767
>>8110717
That'll fucking show that ass wipe village fucking elder! Piece of shit! You fucking pull that bitch Olga's stupid blond ass over your fucking shoulder and set off to kill a fucking tree.

Knowing you'll have to at least carver that piece of shit once you kill it, you bring an axe along from your Father's smithy.

>>8110964
I hope she doesn't also burn and pillage back.

>>8111026
AN AXE? THERE MUST BE WHISTLING THEN!

I feel like I recognize this drawfag.

>>8111026
OW FUCKING CHOP DOWN A HUGE TREE AND CARVE IT WITH OUR RAGE

>>8111026
OW: TELL HER THAT NOT EVERYONE IS FUCKING LUCKY ENOUGH TO COME WITH US FOR FUCKING ADVENTURE OR WHATEVER THE FUCK WE'RE DOING SO SHUT UP AND BE HAPPY.

>>8111026
OW A BOAT IS WEAK, JUST BUILD A FUCKING CATAPULT.

>>8111173
DO BOTH THEN LAUNCH OUR FUCKING BOAT FROM THE CATAPULT!

>>8111192
EVEN BETTER

>>8111080
You artfully carve using SHEER ANGER TOWARDS THE SEA ITSELF. Making a beautiful fucking viking ship in a matter of minutes, you check out the rigging and other fucking shit. Last thing you want to fucking do is be killed by the fucking sea. FUCKING SEA!

>>8111297
OW : TIE OLGA TO THE MAST AND PROCEED TO SAIL OUT TO SEA, CURSING THE SEA WHICH EVERY CURSE YOU HAVE.

>>8111297
OW Fucking throw Olga in our new fucking boat, and get this pillaging under way

>>8111297
OW, RAGEKILL SOME FUCKING FISH. OLGA CAN COOK THEM.

>>8111309
OW

TIE OLGA TO THE FRONT OF THE BOAT

ONE TIT EXPOSED

ITS THE ONLY PROPER FIGUREHEAD FOR A VIKING SHIP

>>8111309
>Sail out to sea
>WHEN BOAT IS STILL ON LAND

FUCK YEAR, THE EARTH. LITERALLY

>>8111297

OW PUT THE BOAT OUT TO SEA AND RIDE THE WHALE ROADS (FUCKING WHALES) TO THE NEAREST BRITISH VILLAGE WITH OLGA.

>>8111447
BRITISH? FUCK THOSE SHITTY ISLANDS.
OW GO TO MOTHERFUCKING NORMANDY. YOU'LL HAVE THE WHOLE CONTINENT TO PILLAGE

>>8111520
FUCK THAT

THOSE PENGUINS IN ANTARCTICA ARE GOING TO FUCKING LEARN A LESSON

>>8111569
Not much to burn/pillage/rape there.

>>8111309
>>8111354
A little of FUCKING A! A little of FUCKING B! You fucking sail out to the motherfucking sea. FUCKING SSSEEEEEAAAAAAA!!!

Truly this was the best way to go, when you angrily think about it. It'll keep you in a frothing rage long after you touch down on land somewhere.

>>8111597
OW GREAT LETS FIND SOME FUCKING LAND AND FUCK SHIT UP

OW: ARRIVE AT GODDAMN AMERICA AND KILL EVERYTHING THAT MOVES!

You should have angry sex with Olga while the stupid ship sails wherever.

>>8111597

OW WHAT THE SHIT IS THAT BEHIND YOUR HEAD?!?

>>8111655
THERE'S A CUNTING DRAGON AND BURNING FISH! KILL THEM!

OW I now realize that I have neglected an important part of the day.

Getting drunk, abusing Olga, and passing out in a drunken rage.

I need my energy for all the rape tomorrow.

>>8111597
Ow, make angry consensual sex with Olga.
Then fucking land somewhere, all this sea is making me nervous.

HANDS. MADE OF BEARS. THIS IS THE BEST WEAPON FOR A BERSERKER.

>>8111653
OW RAPE RAPE RAPE RAPE

>>8111775
Angry sex is not the same thing as rape.

>>8111838
but it can be

>>8111775
You don't rape those you know you barbarian prick!
You can however make angry love to her.

>>8111838
details

Guys ;_; Be nice to olga! She's our faithful companion!

>>8111633
YOU BEGIN YOUR SEARCH FOR SOME FUCKING LAND OTHER THAN THE ONE YOU CAME FROM!

"You know, a map would have been a good idea. Just like supplies would... or money... or an actual goal."

By the one eye of MOTHER FUCKING ODIN! You're not even married and she's already nagging!

>>8111885
Of course she is faithful, she is tied to the fucking mast.

ITT More angry sex than pillage.

>>8111897
OW SLAP HER AND TELL HER TO COOK US SOME FOOD GOD DAMN FUCKING SHIT PISS FUCK

>>8111897
OW: Slap a bitch!
Rape if nagging continues!

>>8111897
OW Clearly there is only one solution. Marry Olga, eat fish, keep looking for land!

>>8111655
OP here. I messed up on perception and angles and details. It was supposed to be a path carved into the ground from the boat. Then I drew some trees it would have knocked over. Then I drew them on fire.

>>8111897

OW: Better get to the adventuring quick. Of course, Olga's nagging would help to keep OW's RAGE levels high.

>>8111931
Is ok. Rage demands moar rage, not pedantic quality.

>>8111897
OW
IF SHE HAS OPINIONS SHE WILL DELIVER THEM WITH FUCKING RAGE, BECAUSE THAT IS ALL YOU RESPECT

>>8111941
Woah. This. Good observation. Olga is a rage generator.

>>8111897
OW BITCHSLAP A WHALE. "HOW IS THAT FOR FOOD BITCH?"

AND YOU DON'T NEED THE MAP YOU HAVE THE FUCKING STARS TO GUIDE YOU (SO FAR AWAY FROM THE SEA THOSE LUCKY WHORES).

>>8111897
TAKE HER MOTHER FUCKING TOP AND WEAR IT AS A HAT!!! THAT'LL SHOW THE NAGGING BITCH WHOSE BOSS!!!!

>>8111897
"BY THE HAMMER OF THOR IF YOU'RE GONNA NAG LIKE A WIFE YOU'RE GONNA FUCK LIKE A WIFE!"

ITT everyone thinks OW is sexually hungry while he's really hungry for THE BLOOD OF HIS ENEMIES

>>8112037
if he cant have the blood of his enemies NOW!!!! he's gonna have to settle for some violent sex, just as long as he has something to do with all of his rage

OW: FORWARD, JUST FUCKING SAIL FORWARD!

>>8111897
THAT'S TAKING FUCKING TOO LONG.
OW JUST THROW THE FUCKING BOAT ON THE FUCKING LAND (yes with him inside. don't underestimate VIKINGANGRYRAGEFUCK).

>>8111897
OW:
Wait, YOUR THE CAPTAIN!
MARRY HER TO THE MAST AS PUNISHMENT

>>8112103
why? she can ignore the mast and keep nagging us

>>8111916
You slap a bitch, the anger induced by the see not letting you see reason. "I'll talk slow so you'll understand. "I'm. Fucking. Tied. To. The. Fucking. Mast. I can't fucking cook like this and you're a fucking moron. Now untie me or when I escape and I will, I will castrate you and force it down your throat."

>>8108971

She started off so happy here...

>>8112252

OW: Food sounds good, but so does PILLAGING!

Maybe Olga whatsherfuckingface knows where we can pillage.

>>8112263
OP here. You're terrible people.

OW Untie Olga, catch fish with rage, make olga cook fish, fuck olga, find land!

GOOD! SHE'S STARTING TO TALK LIKE A PROPER VIKING!

>>8111897
OW SECONDING THIS

>>8112290
OW GOD DAMMIT I MEANT SECONDING THIS

>>8112252
OW STOP ABUSING HERE IT'S NOT MANLY.
YOU'RE NOT FUCKING WEAK DAMMIT.
UNTIE HER NOW.

SHOW HER THE TRUE VALOR OF YOUR RAGE AGAINST WORTHY ENNEMIES.

>>8112263
No, she looks depressed with her mundane life and broken ukulele or whatever that thing is. See we have helped her live a life of adventure!

>>8112252
THAT'S PROPER VIKING SPEAK
OW UNTIE HER

>>8112252
OW, THA'S A ROIGHT BONNY LASS THAR

UNTIE THE LASSIE, AND CARVE SOME MOTHERFUCKING RUNES ON THA MAST

>>8112343
OW, DO THIS

YE CANNAE BE A PROPAH VIKING WITHOOT SOME MOTHERFOOKING ROOOOOOONES

>>8112343

WE NEED COMPANIONS. SCOTTISH COMPANIONS!

>>8112285
Uh, I guess you fucking contemplate this angrily? Sort of. I think.

>>8112408
OW Untie Olga, catch fish with rage, make olga cook fish, fuck olga, find land!

>>8112417

>>8112408
OW, FOLLOW THIS >>8112343 COURSE OF ACTION

>>8112408
ANGRY CONTEMPLATION. WHAT IS THIS FUCKING NONSENSE. BEAT THE CRAP OUT OF THE SEA UNTIL IT TAKES US TO LAND

>>8112417
OW THIS

I agree. Needs more ROONS

>>8112417
OW I second this this.

>>8112408
OW
Grow a MIGHTY MANBEARD FITTING A GOD.

Also, Find Jack Sparrow and steal his FUCKING MAGIC COMPASS

Damnit, why can't we have some GODDAMN CIVILITY HERE!!!!

>>8112417
You untie Olga and then set about catching a fish with- wait. How the fuck are you supposed to "angry out" a fish?!

OW ARCHIVE THIS SHIT I'M GOING TO BED.
I WANT TO READ IT ALL TOMORROW.

>>8112618
YOU KNOW WHO IS CIVIL? THOSE BUGGERING CATHOLIC PRIESTS, THAT'S WHO

WE'RE A GOD-FUCKING VIKING; CIVILITY CAN GO TO HEL

>>8112650
OW

CARVE SOME ROONS ON THE MAST

PRAY TO ODIN TO GIVE YOU THE GIFT OF FISH

>>8112650
OW
Boil the ocean with ANGER.
Tell olga to complain to raise rage levels!

>>8112650
OW DIRECT ANGER TO THE SEA TILL IT BOILS

RECEIVE FISH

OW PUNCH THAT BITCH OF A SEA UNTIL IT PROVIDES SOME FISH

>>8112650
OW MAKE THE SEA BOIL WITH YOUR RAGE

or tie yourself to the boat with a long enough rope and jump into the water. You hatred for the sea will make you go berserk and you're gonna genocide half the ocean before coming back.

>>8112716
>>8112708
BOILING RAAAAAAAAGE MIND

>>8112708
>>8112728
>>8112738
BOIL-THE-SEAMIND

>>8112738
>>8112708
OW ABOUT NO.

WE MUST FIND A WHITE WHALE

THEN WE MUST SPLIT OUR LUNGS WITH BLOOD AND THUNDER

THE OCEAN MUST BOIL.

>>8112684
Fucking ruins had better be fucking worth it. Fucking carving with a fucking axe while fucking holding on to the mast. By Thor this entire fucking adventure is falling apart like a limp... fucking piece of shit... FUCK!

>>8112884
OW READ NOTE HUG OLGA.

>>8112898
Read note?

>>8112884
KNOW WHAT? FUCK GODS!
OW KILL THE FISH WITH YOUR BEAR HANDS, YOUR AXE AND A BOX OF SCRAPS

>>8112884

OW: IS THAT FUCKING LAND AHEAD?

>>8112915
Meh, I was looking for an excuse to let us show something similar to affection for her, thus the hug, and I couldn't think of how to do it in character since we're pretty much a fucking Khornate berserker, so I decided to fall back on an old quest meme.

>>8112978
the only acceptable viking method of showing affection is rough, angry sex!

>>8112993
Nothing like viking parental love.

>>8112993
With cuddling?

>>8112993
I'm pretty sure even vikings had some form of courtship before they got to the sex

Goddamnit /tg/ now i'm going to spend the rest of the night researching viking courtship

>>8113061
ANGRY CUDDLING

>>8113097
Meh, I'll take what I can get.

>>8113058

Or pointless and gruelling trials.

>>8112884
OW ANGRILY CUDDLE OLGA

>>8112898
>>8112915
>>8112978
>>8112993
>>8113061
>>8113097

"Hey bitch!"

"The fuck do you want? Hey! W-what the hell are you doing?!"

"I'm fucking giving you a hug! Now fucking appreciate it! ...The fuck are you doing?"

"I'm fishing with some spare string and a little food I have."

"Fucking really?"

"Yes, really."

YOU KNOW WHAT THE VIKINGS THOUGHT WAS PRETTY BADASS? POETRY. I BET THAT EVERYONE GOES OUT AND PILLAGES SOME PLACE WHEN THEY'RE DOING WHATEVER IT IS WE'RE DOING, WE SHOULD WRITE A FUCKING SAGA. THAT WILL REALLY IMPRESS PEOPLE.

>>8113231
OW FISH LIKE THOR'S THUNDER!

>>8113243

I think we need a skald then.

OW NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR WOMEN, I'VE A BATTLE TO WAGE

I PEER INTO THE DISTANCE, THE HEAT OF MY ANGER SCARING THE WIND INTO PROPELING ME TO LAND

>>8113268
LETS GO PILLAGE SOME OTHER VIKING PLACE WE DON'T LIKE AND STEAL THEIR SKALD

>>8113279
WE HAVE STOLEN ONE ALREADY? WHY THE FUCK DO YOU NEED TWO SKALDS?

>>8113319
I DON'T THINK WE HAVE, BUT IF SO LET'S STEAL ANOTHER IN CASE THE FIRST ONE ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH

>>8113279
OW ABOUT NO.

OW ABOUT WE MAKE OLGA OUR TSUNDERE SKALD

>>8113325
IT WOULD SEEM THAT OLGA IS A SKALD

OW: GET DRUNK ON MEAD
adviceolaf.jpg
WRITE POETRY

>>8113267
Fucking fish. Olga cooked them... adequately. Stupid bitch.

>>8113376
OW SCREAM VIKING CURSES OF GRATITUDE FOR THE FISH! THEN OFFER TO PUNCH THE DISHES!

OW: FUCK WHERE THE HELL IS THAT LAND ALREADY

This adventure isn't very vikingy. When do we collect a crew and pillage shit? Also why the fuck did we bring olga, what was the point of that? Viking women should stay in the village- sailing is man's work.

>>8113396
FUCK THOSE PANSY ASS VIKINGS AND THE SEA!

>>8113400
You're doing it wrong. We should've been like Askeladd, not Thorkell.

OW CHOP OFF YOUR OWN ARM AND REPLACE IT WITH THE GOD HAND, THEN GO DRAGON-KICK SOME DAMN PARISIANS INTO THE MILKY WAY

>>8113416
SERIOUSLY, WHY DO YOU FEEL THE NEED TO MAKE WEEABOO VIKING COMPARISONS (WHICH WERE STUPIDLY INACCURATE DEPICTIONS, BY THE WAY) WHEN THERE WERE PERFECTLY AWESOME VIKINGS IN NORSE STORIES? FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCKKKKK!

>>8113416

Akeladd was awesome.

>>8113416
We're not a full-flegded viking yet. And we took Olga just to fuck with the Elder

>>8113349
OW: DO THIS

>>8113329
OW DO THIS

>>8113388
THANKS FOR NOT POISONING ME WITH YOUR SHITTY COOKING WENCH! NOW IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME, I"M GOING TO FUCKING STARE ANGRILY AT THE SEA UNTIL IT BRINGS US TO LAND!

>>8113416
OP here. I need to google so I know what you're talking about.

>>8113504
Don't bother. Vinland Saga is to vikings what Dragonball fanfiction is to Japan.

>>8113490
OW: GO FIND A VIKING PLACE WE DON'T LIKE, FUCK THEIR SHIT UP, AND STEAL THEIR SKALD SO WE CAN WRITE AN EPIC SAGA

>>8113539
OW, NO. MAKE OLGA INTO YOUR SKALD, SHE CAN START FROM THE FUCKING BEGINNING

>>8113490
OW STARE AT THE SEA AND WAIT FOR NINJA VIKINGS TO APPEAR. OR A PIECE OF LAND, BUT THE LAND SUCKS.

>>8113553
WHO THE FUCK EVER HEARD OF A GIRL SKALD? THAT'S PANSY SOUTHERNER SHIT RIGHT THERE.

You need to get more vikingy gear. Those clothes suck.

>>8113602

OW, IF WE CAN'T MAKE OLGA OUR SKALD, MAKE HER OUR WIFE.

>>8113504
Good news is you found land! Bad news is, you suck at slowing down your fucking majestic viking ship. Worse news, you seem to be fairly fucking aerodynamic.

>>8113615
WE CAN NAB SOME WHILE WE'RE NABBING A SKALD

OW: INVENT BIRTH CONTROL

>>8113623
OW: CATCH A BIRD WITH OUR TEETH
EAT IT RAW

>>8113454
>weeaboo

Go back to /b/ and learn what that word means before visiting 4chan at large, kid.

>>8113623

OW HOIST THEY MOTHERFUCKING AXE MID-FLIGHT READY TO KILL WHATEVER YOU LAND NEAR

>>8113666
>Implying that everything made in Japan isn't weeaboo

>>8113623
OW INVESTIGATE THE LAND

>>8113648
FUCK PLOTTING A SAFE COURSE TO LAND!

>>8113730
CRUNCH! CRUNCH! YOU BET YOU"LL BE FEELING THAT IN THE FUCKING MORNING!

>>8113730
EAT ITS HEART
advicelunar
WEAR ITS SKIN

>>8113730
OW YOU FUCKING DUMBASS

YOU JUST KILLED A GODDAMN ALBATROSS

FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUU

AIM FOR A SOFT SPOT ON LAND, THEN GET BACK TO OLGA

>>8113738
OKAY WE'VE LANDED.
OW YOU'RE A BERSERKER! NOW YOU NEED TO SERK A BEAR!

KILL A BEAR BY HATING IT TO DEATH, BUT NOT BEFORE YOU FORCE IT TO SKIN ITSELF AND MAKE YOU A BERSERKER HIDE.

>>8113699
>not reading what I said
>still not getting the meaning of the word weeaboo, which is a noun by the way

>>8113747
You landed on a piece of shit rock. Luckily there were some trees in the way to break your fucking fall. Finding Olga is simple enough considering the stupid wench is hanging from a tree by one hand.

"...Don't leave me hanging? Get it?"

>>8113933
OW Grab my wench and set her on the fucking ground.
Try and find out where the fuck I am.

>>8113789
>>8113789
>>8113789
>>8113789
>>8113789
>>8113789

>>8113951
OW Don't bring her down, fucking push the tree into the ground until shes standing up..

>>8113951
WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?! You're hopelessly lost! You'll never be able to find out where you fucking are! Oh wait. Fucking never mind. There's some fucking smoke.

>>8114048
Burn the forest to clear a path to the fire

>>8114048
OW HEAD TO THE SMOKE AND CRACK SOME HEADS

TELL OLGA TO START WRITING OUR SAGA

>>8114153
OW ALTERNATELY, SHELVE THE QUEST FOR NOW AND CONTINUE TOMORROW, IF YOU WOULD BE SO KIND

You'll probably get a lot more enthusiastic people, since most 4channers are either sleeping or just wakin' up.

>>8114172
I've decided not to sleep tonight actually. I'll get my three journals done, then go to class at 9:30 then when classes are done at 12:15 I will return, lock my door and slumber until at least 8 pm.

OP here. Lost the place in the quest and had to scroll to page 4. I'm assuming it's auto-dying or whatever the term is. I'll attempt to do more tomorrow.

Not wanting to railroad the plot is the whole reason this thing got so convoluted though. I'm thinking of maybe setting up a solid goal or something to keep the focus set better. Also, do people hate Olga? She seemed to get slapped around quite a bit.

>>8114221
That's just /tg/'s inner mysogynist at work. In reality, we'll love her as long as she has snappy comebacks and reacts to our anger in kind.

We're supposed to be a viking. Everyone here loves Olga, we just have to beat the shit out of her because we're the goddamned OW.

On a related note. I'm thinking of incorporating an "OI" command for Olga but it may over complicate things.

>>8114254
That may be a bit overcomplicated. You could use her as your Quest Runner mouthpiece and a counterbalance to our insanity, as another viable option.