Let's inquire with the innkeeper about how the crops are doing and suchlike. Farming villages fucking /love/ talking about how the crops are doing.

Plus, it'll open up a dialogue.

>>8651191
>Let's inquire with the innkeeper about how the crops are doing and suchlike. Farming villages fucking /love/ talking about how the crops are doing.

The innkeeper hacks into the cheap wooden mug he's slopping out, and then squints back up at you. "Crops are doin' just fine for winter, missy," he says, "know much about crops, do ya?"

Let's strangle the innkeeper with a spare sock.

Oh well. Thanks for playing, /tg/.

Gimme a moment to read up and i'll play

>>8651351
"I know enough." flash an innocent smile at the barkeep. "What I don't know, however, are the working hands. I require some firewood from my travels and I would rather like to speak to the woodcutter personally."

bump?

No sooner do the words escape your lips than the innkeeper bursts into flames.

>>8651915
shiiit! the roof, the roof, the roof is on fire!

>>8651732
"You want some wood? Whaddya want it for? Got plenty in the storeroom, give you a cheaper price than Hans will."

(Alright, let's press on.)

"Yes. I like wood...if there's enough of it.. Let's go to the storeroom, and you can take out the wood and we'll see if there's enough."

>>8652026
Yay, you're back.
"Whilst I have nothing against you personally, I have learnt to never take one person's word. If your price is cheaper, then I'll come back and buy them."

>>8652095
>>8652043
What's it going to be?

>>8652188
I'd rather save seducing the barkeep for later and try to provoke a reaction about the lack of woodkeepers and farmers first.

>>8652188
Let's strangle the innkeeper with a spare sock.

>>8652188
I vote for >>8652095

>>8652043 Sounds like a gateway into erotic fiction.


This whole scenario feels like settlers of catan.

>>8652243
>Settlers of Catan

*smirk*

>>8652095
>"Whilst I have nothing against you personally, I have learnt to never take one person's word. If your price is cheaper, then I'll come back and buy them."

The innkeep grumbles a little, but gives you directions to Hans' house. He says the lumber camp is on the outskirts of Hamlin. Tightening up your cloak, you wander back out into the snow which feels colder than ever after the heat of the fire.

The head woodcutter's shack is quite close, but you knock on the door repeatedly to no answer. What you can see through the frosted up windows appears normal - though the shack is hardly secure.

Will you head to the lumber camp? Or attempt to investigate the shack?

WHAT DO?

>>8652349
>+trip, 'twas me.

>>8652349
turn into a giant fanged vagina and call him a phallic object

>>8652349
Toss logs of firewood through the window, then run away in a random direction, eyes shut tightly.

>>8652349
WHAT DO?!
Investigate the shack. It's as cold as a witch's teat out here.

>>8652392
rimshot.jpg

rolled 8, 7, 3 = 18

Move along now, nothing to see here amongst the piss ocean.

WHAT DO? I'm going to eat the trail rations as quickly as possible.

>>8652392
>>8652382
You make your way round to the back of the Hans' house. In the yard there is a large pile of cut firewood under a crude wooden awning and a cart, less covered in snow than most everything else, filled with coarser, uncut logs.

The back door is unsecured, and pushes inwards at your touch. Inside, things are entirely normal - there's a large pile of bedding, a pantry (mostly empty) and a stack of shelves with a few candles and other fragile goods on them. One corner of the main room (and bedroom) is stacked with a few crates serving as a storeroom of sorts. It's a cheap little house, but it doesn't appear to be an unusual one.

Nonetheless, you are intent on this investigation, and look more carefully.
>roll 1d20 for me

>>8652589
>Also, I'm a fucking tool who can't trip to save his life.

>>8652589
Continue running away in a random direction, eyes shut tightly. Once I no longer have any idea where I am, ravenously devour the field rations and turn the spare set of clothing inside out.

rolled 1 = 1

>>8652593
evidently. stop distracting yourself with other threads.

rolled 8 = 8

>>8652612
well. shit.

>>8652607
You starve to death in the woods and your rotting remains are eaten by a bear. Only the red snow stains remain as testament to your existence, and in time, even they fade away.

Restart from last save.

>>8652612
Hard as you look, you can find nothing strange or odd about this hut.

WHAT DO?

>>8652662
Grumble like mutley for a moment, and take out your divining cards. Something isn't right.

>>8652612
I come to /tg/, see this thread, and this is our first roll of the night? It does not bode well!

Great to see this again OP.

>>8652691
Now you're thinking with prophecy! You remove the delicate cards, but what are you going to ask of them? Will you simply lay them upon the floor to take your reading?

>>8652745
The floor? Of course not! They might get dirty! No, use the table. As for what to ask them... attempt to discern where the woodcutter is. Something must have happened if he didn't lock his door.

>>8652745
Let the cards guide me for now.

>>8652781
The cards can be consulted about decisions, but cannot make them. They tell you nothing. Yet.

>>8652778
Lacking a table, you begin to concentrate while shuffling the cards. Such a precise divination may be difficult, but knowing the name of the subject will help. You may draw one, three or five cards. The more cards, the better the answer - and the longer the time it takes. How many will you draw?

>answer, and another d20 roll please

rolled 5 = 5

>>8652865
3 cards.

>>8652878
Fuck.

>>8652781
man, our rolls suck.

>>8652878
The first card is Justice. It depicts a Legionnaire of the Old Kingdom in full battle armour. Your drawing of this card is associated with Hans' recent past, and your skills tell you that, here, it means agreements concluded and things put to rights. There is an element of violence in this draw.

The next card is The Chariot, reversed. Shown on the card is a war chariot of the Southern peoples', pulled by horses representing the sun and moon and occupied by a single Southerner warrior, surrounded by a legion of familiar phantoms.The hint of violence is amplified - this card draws most strongly on the present, and represents poor use of force and might turned against the weak or righteous. Senseless violence and warmongering.

Lastly, and attached to the future, is Indolence reversed. On the card is a man walking away from a spilled golden cup. This represents the abandoning of a great endeavour, something which had been the subject of love and devotion. In this context, you suspect it means life. You understand this reading means a murder, though whether of the woodcutter or someone else you cannot tell.

It has taken you longer than expected to tell this fortune, and you hear footsteps crunching on the fresh snow outside. Someone is heading to the back of the yard!

WHAT DO?

>>8653027
Try to escape. Clearly killed his wife.

>>8653085
How are you going to escape?

>>8653195
Curse of deceit. Once that's been laid on him, we sodomize him until he doesn't know that he isn't our wife.

>>8653195
Through the front door. Since he's coming from the back, this should avoid him.

Just going to leave it dudes. Might write this up as a system or maybe make a DH mod for it. Bad quest is bad.

>>8653705
>Implying that just because you cracked his trip means that you're OP

Suuuuuuuuuuuure you are.

>>8653752
Aheh...

Really not sure how to answer that one. I've gone through all my most distinctive pictures. Maybe this one will convince you? It was the title pic in the very first (unarchived) Witch Quest.

>>8653790
Well... shit. Don't give up man. Tonight may have been a bad night and I can understand that you might want to stop for now, but please do continue this sometime. I was actually looking forwards to seeing this tonight, and... yeah. Hearing that it's done for ever saddens me.

>>8653790
Can we bring back Beatrice?

Please don't leave
This has so much potential

>>8653815
There's never really been a good night. The original was the most successful and even that was hardly rapid. Every single other quest I look at is more successful. What's the point? If I can't make a successful quest I shouldn't try and force an unsuccessful one. There have been compliments, but not many posts. Sorry to disappoint.

(And seriously? Trying AGAIN?)

>>8653790
Hey man.
I was here for the first un archived thread.
I remember Beatrice
I'm sorry you had to suffer through my immortal, but please don't give up

>>8653878
DON'T LEAVE

>>8653878
Come on man, we can still make this work!

>>8653878
DON'T YOU DIE ON ME
I WAITED THREE FUCKING WEEKS TO FINISH THIS STORY

>>8653878
Do away with that defeatist attitude! So you're is not the most popular quest on the board. So what? So what if you get some trolls. Every quest has them. I was here Tuesday and I really liked where this was going. Please don't discontinue it.

>>8653878
You want to talk about trolls?
Hoo boy, let me tell you about trolls

I TRY TO STEAL SCROOGE MCDUCK'S NUMBER ONE DIME.

I can hardly believe there are like 6 people protesting when nowhere near that number have posted in the thread. I'm flattered, but I can't help but assume this is a vocal minority.

>>8653947
I don't know about the other guys, but I just showed up here tonight
I would've gotten here earlier, but I had stuff I gotta do.
Come on man, I was there for the unarchived first thread.
Can't let me down now!

>>8653947
I think it's just that most people in here lurk. I'm >>8653922
>>8653815

So continue with the story darnit!

>>8653947
PROCEEDE FAGGOT

>>8653947
Yeah, yeah, whatever
(Slacker)

>>8653947
So, like four people want you to this.
Come on!
Believe in yourself!
This is a good premise!
We have two good characters!
We can make this work!

>>8653983
Why would you lurk? The whole point is audience participation!

Right, let's try this a final time:
How are you going to escape the cabin? The footsteps are approaching the back door.

>>8654052
Like I said, leave through the front. I assume there's a front door as well?

>>8654052
Alright, I'll play along in the hopes that we'll meet Beatrice as an NPC
Um. Where are the windows located?

>>8654052
Wait for Hans
Talk to him about the other witch that showed up in little Hamlin today
And ask about rats

>>8654052
For the same reason that people sit around and watch other people play basketball instead of actually going out and playing it: because sometimes it is fun to watch, without having any input.

>>8654074
Two by the front door, and one at the back.

>>8654069
Of course. It is bolted. The bolt is rusty and liable to make some noise being pulled.

>>8654052
Um, front door, I guess.
Why do we want to escape?
Are we tresspassing?

>>8654099
We are indeed.

>>8654093
Okay, out the window then
I don't know why we're sneaking around though

>>8654105
Can't we just like talk to the guy?
I mean, I think it's understandable, what with the snow storm and everything

>>8654099
We're in the house of Hans, the chief woodcutter, so yes. We broke in to investigate and, finding nothing, conducted a divination that told us Hans had been the subject of or otherwise involved in a murder.

>>8654118
Not snow storm. Read the thread. We came here, and he wasn't home so we let ourselves in. Not to mention we don't know if it's the owner. Might be someone else.

>>8654120
I thought that was the future? Has the death happened already?

>>8654120
Oh. Okay. Shit.
Leave through window.
Leave no trace
Is this the same anti magic guy from before?
When we were Beatrice?

>>8654091
YOU DONE STARTED PARTICIPATING NOW BOY YOU'D BETTER CONTINUE.

>>8654074
>>8654088
Beatrice is much stronger than Ingrid and has been retconned. I'll throw her in later if we get the chance.

>>8654120
Exit via window

>>8654148
What? No, I've BEEN participating. I was just saying that the reason that there were few posts but then when you said you'd stop more people came out of the woodwork was probably because they were lurking.

>>8654137
Yeah, it was in the near future at the time of reading. It may or may not have happened by now.

>>8654138
There was an anti-magic guy?

>>8654148
So exit stage left then?
Through a window
Perferably not purused by bears

>>8654174
You know, the big blonde guy from the South
He was standing around being all looming and stuff at the fight club

>>8654157
Why the window instead of the door?

>>8654174
How far away are we from town?

>>8654193
Door is creaky
Will notify Hans McMurderson of our presence

>>8654174
Wait
Shit,
Could it be our own murder?
LEAVE THIS PLACE NOW

>>8654207
No it won't. You don't even know how creaky the front door is, we've never opened it. Besides, the window might not even be big enough for us to get out of. Hell, it might not even be the kind that opens. Stop jumping to conclusions. I doubt the guy is going to kill us, and even if he tries we have a 19 modifier to our strength.

>Window
(I hadn't planned for the windows to open but I feel bad doing that to you now.)

You move, as silently as possible, over to the window and draw it open as fast as you can while still being careful. It makes a small squeak, and then you are through and landing with silent feet onto the snow outside. There is a dull crunch but nothing so loud as the encroaching footsteps. You pull the window shut as ably as you opened it and crouch down, hidden from the view of any inside.

Through the thin cabin walls, you hear the back door being rudely cast open and a CLOMP CLOMP CLOMP noise of footsteps on the wooden floor. Heavy boots, perhaps? There's a loud sniffing or snorting and then another CLOMP. Will you stay hidden, poised for action, or make a break for it?

WHAT DO?

>>8654240
Um.
Shit.
Wait until guy isn't looking through window, then run away quietly.

>>8654183
Yeah, he's drunk at the inn right now. You were told he makes loud animal noises in his sleep.

>>8654240
>If you hadn't planned on it, then don't change it. Let us try the window and find that they don't open. Okay, we've wasted time and are closer to being found. It's not the end of the world.

Cast charm of Deceit to keep them from seeing/smelling us, then run back to the village.

>>8654240
Run away! (Without drawing attention to ourselves)

>>8654260
It's just to expedite the delay and get with moving on. Besides, our physical modifier is a '19' (as the poster above says) so we're good at forcing windows and being quick and silent.

>Curse of Deceit
Right, let's get a d20 roll.

rolled 2 = 2

>>8654286

>>8654300
Oh come on!

rolled 2 = 2

>>8654286
I hate rolling

>>8654300
>>8654316
Maybe low is good in this system?

>>8654324
Call me a cynic, but I doubt that

>>8654324
It isn't.

>>8654300
(Mwahaha!) You summon the magical energies you are so used to using, and picture cloaking yourself in deception. You can feel the snow resist your footsteps underneath, already surging up to leave no trace of your presence. This wave of deceit slopes forward, restoring the dust on the windows and shelves and then, as you break forward, breaks utterly against the entity inside the shack.

You sprint, and the echoes of the curse in your wake cover your steps in the snow, but all the while you are plagued with visions of something inhuman, unreal. A porcine snout sniffs the tender frozen air and the hoof of a goat bangs against a wooden board. You are bolting away from the shed, but know that what is inside has caught the truth of your passing. Where shall you go now? WHAT DO?

>>8654368
>Oh, ffs.

>>8654368
Run to the nearest source of habitation.
Fuck.
Get out the knife, be ready for another curse of deceit

>>8654368
Run to town. There are people there, I'm sure they'll help us,. Assuming the thing is brave enough to follow us all that way.

>>8654368
Fuck me, you just want to kill us, don't you?
Alright
Anybody got any other option than run like a little girl?

>>8654394
Run away like a big girl?
Honestly, I've got nothing

>>8654383
>I can't believe I even forgot my trip on the 'I forgot my trip post'.

The nearest source of habitation would be one of the many village houses nearby. The inn is also relatively close. You could reach many buildings without much trouble, but would no doubt have to explain an unwelcome intrusion.

>>8654394
Well, we could stand and fight. Which is like commuting suicide, only more painful.

>>8654407
The inn. Go to the inn.

>>8654407
Fuck, whatever's closest
Or more likely to have Beatrice
That girl knows how to fight

>>8654407
We can explain when we get there.
JUST RUN TO THE NEAREST PLACE WITH THE MOST AMOUNT OF PEOPLE

>>8654407
Explanation
"MURDER!
DEMONS!
TRYING TO KILL ME
PLEASE HELP!"

>>8654452
>>8654420
>I'll say 'inn' - you at least know there are several people there and it's close.

You quickly reach the inn you left not long ago and burst in the door with a muted (the spell of deception still weaving itself around you) clatter. The innkeep, washing a slightly differently coloured mug, looks up at your entry. "Something sure got you bothered, missy," he pauses, and spits into the tankard, "Hans' charging that much for firewood this winter?" He gives you a gap-toothed grin. The big Southerner is no longer in the common room, although Maggie still seems to be clattering in the back.

>>8654509
"Hans murdered someone.
Or will murder someone.
The cards aren't clear. The point is that we have bigger problems than overpriced firewood."

>>8654509
"There was something in his cabin! Some kind of monster! It chased me!"

Don't tell them about the cards or what we suspect about murder.

>>8654531
We have no idea if it means that he'll kill someone or that he's been killed. Either way, they don't need to know that. What they do need to know about is the monster.

>Shout conflicting things

You wail incoherently at the innkeeper and he catches something about 'demons' and 'monsters' amidst the screaming. Reaching below the counter of the bar, his hand returns with a thick iron shortsword clasped within. Moving quickly, he pushes open the door you so hastily entered. Sword in one hand, dirty mug in the other, he stands facing... nothing. The snowscape is empty of any life at all. There's the noise of heavy footsteps on wood behind you and spin, fearing wildly, to watch Maggie finally emerge from the kitchen. She is an enormous, grossly fat woman with a meat cleaver held in two meatlike hands. "There's nothing there," the innkeep says, short of breath, "nothing at all."

WHAT DO?

>>8654614
Explain about the monster. And our suggestions weren't THAT conflicting...

>>8654623
No. That's why I gave what matched and left out what there was controversy about.

>>8654646
Oh. Okay, I guess that makes sense. And damnit, where did everyone go?

>>8654659
No idea. I thought we were well underway there.

>>8654779
Me too. And then it just petered out. Weird.

>>8654779
I'm sorry guys.
I have to leave for tonight.
Can we archive and pick this up tomorrow?

>>8654779
Sorry. I had to leave.
It's almost 11 o'clock
My mom said I had to go to bed.
I'll be here all night friday, though

>>8654845
Archive it if you want. I'll pick it up tomorrow if I am not out.

>>8654865
Right
Archiving
Please don't let this die.
You're a good writer, and this quest has potential!

>>8654865
Any specific time?

>>8654902
I don't know, I guess about 7 or 8 EST. If I am not out.

>>8654921
>>8654865
Alright, I'll be back then as well. Thanks for continuing with this OP. You'll always have at least me interested in this Quest.

>>8654950
Good to know there's interest, I suppose.

Hey, props to whoever caught the quote. I look forward to seeing if you get the next one.

Man, I just finished reading up and it's already stopping? Blast.

>>8655166
Suddenly, Maggie turns into a bear and kills and eats you.

FIN

>>8655387
I give the bitch indigestion. Take THAT!

>>8655387
What? I thought you said you'd continue it! Don't give us a cop-out ending like that.

>>8655407
I couldn't resist the impulse to post that. Don't worry, you can get killed be a bear again tomorrow.

>>8655432
>be a bear

OH SHIT I GAVE AWAY THE SECRET ENDING.

>>8655432
>>8655486
O GOD!