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    2.18 MB Settler Quest: Part Two Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)11:47 No.8702610  
    Don't Be A Cock Gnoblar, guis

    SO! Quick recap for those who weren't around for the first shot: You are the Glorious Leader of a growing tribe of goblins. And not the "I'M SAAAAAAAAAAD" kind, either. The "I'll rip your fucking nose off with my bare hands" kind.

    And honestly, you're doing pretty damn swell. You've captured some worgs, killed a pissed-off bear in heat, got yourself some trained speargobs, some bowgobs, and dug out a pretty decent warren that's still expanding.

    Oh, and your village had a whole fucking slew of anklebiters that are now being fed from the shallow pond you constructed next to the major river.

    Now for a SRS OVERVIEW:
    62 goblins in the tribe currently, 36 of which are now maturing into adults under the watch of the six WIMINFOLK in the tribe. It's been two weeks since you last did anything, mainly recovering from when the bear clawed you and eating fish and bear meat. The warren is currently located under a hill near a small river, with a large oak tree over it. Your 6 digger-gobs have dug out living quarters, a small storeroom, a cesspit (Because even Goblins don't like the smell of their own shit), and a small hole to pile the food into.

    The tree has a small board-and-rope system for a single lookout to peer over, and the river- as mentioned before- has a shallow pond attached in which you are trapping fish for the tribe to eat. But fuck if you're going to just sit around like some pussy-ass Elf, eating fish and loafing around.

    Besides, being a Blessed of Torg (Meaning you're a godly little mutant with half-meter-long spines sticking out of your skin) makes it hard for you to sit comfortably.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)11:50 No.8702640
    Okay, so maybe it's not as short of a recap as I would have liked. But fuck, you're the GLORIOUS LEADER! Who the fuck is going to care if you're a bit windy about describing your victories? You've got your shortsword, your Spiky Board (With those shiny silver nails rammed through it), and a DWARFUCKIN' BADASS AXE of particularly high dwarfy quality.

    The village seems to be doing alright. Current village loadout:
    62 Goblins left:
    2 out on patrol for Death Lotus (Goblin tribe, very sneaky bastards)
    6 women. All knocked up AGAIN.
    6 Diggers working to dig out warren.
    2 Bow guards
    2 Fish-herding
    2 Royal Goblin Guards
    2 Speargobs on the roadside
    3 Speargobs idle (All of which have some basic crafting skills)
    36 Children ("We're pre-teens, daaaaad! C'mon, be cool!")
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)11:50 No.8702642

    We need to find another source of reliable food, no telling when our source of fish might run into problems.

    This food will allow us to keep expanding our numbers greatly, and feed the growing bear cubs that we're training.

    For the new people, last thread was here: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/8682575/
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)11:50 No.8702649
    We better figure out a way to increase food production. See if we can send scouts to locate some animals to put in pens?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)11:52 No.8702673
    Make sure our loyal guards get access to women on the next sex run.

    Also the goblins who had shaman kids should get another go.

    And our shaman of course.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)11:53 No.8702694

    Well, you've got delicious fish, as well as some leftover Elf Meat and freshly-drying Bear Meat. Your shaman, Ninetoes, is currently occupied raising two chil'ren as shamans. Because let's face it: Three shamans is going to make you GLORIOUSLY magical.

    And shiny. You bet that much magic could make you shine like some kind of northernly astral phenomenon.

    But as it stands, there's some wild berries and the like out in the woodlands near your small village, but there's other critters that rely on that stuff to eat. So, forager beware.

    There's also a small farming village to the south, down the caravan road. You bet they have a TON of delicious babies to eat. You can't even remember what baby tastes like, except that it's absolutely /delicious/.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)11:55 No.8702713
    Pre-teen? Sounds like they could be doing some useful work.

    Collecting the edible food from bushes and trees should be a good start. Phrase it as a game, and them being quick little squirts should keep too many from being eaten by the other things eating that food.

    Our numbers will expand some more, and then we can absorb the Black Lotus.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)11:56 No.8702726
    So. What exactly can our Shaman DO besides sitting around and taking up valuable resources? He can cast basic spells, right?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)11:56 No.8702727
    Child says: "When will we eat elf like the heroes do?"
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)11:57 No.8702737
    Our sneakiest of the children should be appointed Scout-in-Training. Have them go snoop on this farming settlement and report back, but priority is to not be seen.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)11:57 No.8702750
    If watch elf, can we eat it?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)11:58 No.8702754

    Answer: "When you goblin the fuck up and kill your own damn elves."
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)11:58 No.8702759
    You have six worgs that are currently tamed and waiting for you to do something with them. If you want, you could probably cut them up. The Worgmaster might be pissed, but who cares about that little shiteater? You also have the bear cubs...

    But they're freaking bear cubs! Who the hell wants to eat something that'd be a BADASS MOUNT of BADASSERY? Besides, you killed their mother. Gotta give them at least a chance at revenge, right?

    Well your shaman already picked out one of the six chil'ren girls for himself when she comes of age. Creepy? Slightly. But hey, so far he's proven pretty useful, so who really cares about some Pedogoblinoidophelia? Speaking of which, he's still got those personal belongings of the dead folk to magic around with.

    Your personal guards, Clawfoot and Onebrow, are definitely ready to go for the women when they're done raising this newfangle generation and their vicious ways. Your own children seem particularly vicious. You even watched bite off the, err, dangly bits of some other woman's child!

    It almost brought a tear to your beady little eyes. A chip right off the vicious block.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:00 No.8702781
    A hunting party might lead to more immediate results. Also, farming strikes me as especially ungoblinlike...

    Personally, I'd like us to scout the vincinity for food and victims, or at least have our fighting goblins practice their weapons...
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:01 No.8702788
    Are these kids being educated? Got to give them a good education.

    And by education I mean brainwashing into total loyalty to GLORIOUS LEADER, SAVIOR OF THE GOBLIN RACE.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:01 No.8702794
    No, we'll keep those wargs to run down anyone trying to flee the settlement when we attack.

    Cultivate loyalty into those kids so we don't have to smack down too many in usurping attempts.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:02 No.8702802
    "Did you know FEARLESS LEADER is the last greatest hope for goblin kind? It's true."

    TL;DR: Form personality cult.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:02 No.8702809
    we must find a way to get more worg.
    also as someone suggested one of the shaman-kid shoul be taken as our child and risen as such while is is teached about shamanism by the old. Don't trust the old shaman.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:03 No.8702819
    What if instead of farming ourselves, we captured the village and made them farm for us? We take a percentage of their crops and livestock, and if they behave we don't eat too many babies.

    Our warg riders can patrol and make sure they don't try and send for help.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:03 No.8702824

    It does bring a tear to our eyes, one of joy. One less male to worry about trying to fuck our wimins!

    Get ol' Ninetoes working on... hmm... I know! Calling up the dead elf spirits! Yah! Interrogate the dead fuckers! Find out all we can about the village they were heading to, and the village they came from!

    If ol' Ninetoes can't manage that, tell him he best be able to do it before the next litter comes, otherwise he is going to find himself Notoes. Or anything else for that matter.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:04 No.8702834

    We can even set up a fair system of taxation! I'm thinking that the villagers can pay, "However much we can stuff into this sack," set to be payed, "whenever we feel like it."
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:05 No.8702837
    face it. we're not smart enough to keep a whole village kidnapped. a sentinel asleep and we're all fucked. also they will probably cheat about what they owe us..
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)12:05 No.8702842
    You decide to be a bit cruel and have the children go out to collect some food. Not, you know, entirely unsupervised.

    Oh, who the hell are we kidding? You send the little annoying bastards out in the wild, and they return with a decent amount of food. Interestingly enough, three of their number are missing.

    And one of your children came back with some goblin meat he "found lying around". Obviously your wimin raised him well!

    Shame about the others, though. They still brought back enough to keep themselves fed for the next week or so, and two even came back with enough to need satchels to carry it all. Thankfully you've still got some bags from those bolts of fine cloth.
    He mostly can use "primitive" magic...but there's more fancy stuff he can accomplish. So far he's mainly been your chief runner-arounder and do-er-of-things, like teaching the craftgobs how to craft, and the diggers where to dig.

    He's got the memorandums of the corpses you found in the bear cave (Now your personal HQ), and apparently is "doing something" with them related to whatever Shamans do with the belongings of the dead.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:06 No.8702851
    >>3 speargobs idle


    They'd best be practicing their spear skills, or they're going to be put to work crafting instead.

    We expect marked improvement within the week. Coming up with a new technique in the way of stabbing means they get promoted.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:09 No.8702878
    However, if we just kill them all on the spot, we'll be able to take everything they own! Not only will we be able to eat them, but also their food! And just think of all the glorious loot that'll get us, and what we'll be able to do with it! We build our warren from the contents of a measly elven cart - what more could we build from a whole village?
    We'd have to plan that one very carefully, though....
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:09 No.8702884
    we should investigate about the other goblin village. they can be great stealth units...
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:10 No.8702888

    Well, best leave him to whatever it is shamans do. Continue offering guano in the misguided belief that shamans are batshit for it. Scout out the rural farming village, paying particular attention to flags. We don't want to raze the thing to the ground, mind. Razing villages leads to adventurers poking around, and adventurers leads to a lot of dead goblins.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:11 No.8702897
    Hmmm you have a point. I was trying to clever goblin our way into a lasting steady food supply, but if we brute goblin our way into a giant surplus we can use that to catapult our efforts.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:12 No.8702916
    this. we must scout it before

    and we should build fortification of some kind to have a better defence...
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:13 No.8702917
    Obviously, we would take all the houses' building material and make some sort of crude fort with it.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:13 No.8702927
    So did we find a sneaky one to be scout in training?
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)12:16 No.8702943
    You begin extolling the virtues of your own greatness to the women, who are actually smart enough to pick up on what you do. Plus, the fact that you now have a very bitchin' bear skin cloak and bear skull helmet adds to your reputation. The children seem pretty damn intimidated by you, as well as awed by your very impressive deeds so far.

    You decide to mount up with some of the bowgobs and speargobs to go out. But as far as you know, these worgies are all you have. But hey, who are we kidding? You could breed them, then have that annoying Worgmaster gob sally forth and capture even MORE of them!

    Or get ripped to shreds by them. Either way, it works.

    You also decide to raise one of the shaman-kids personally. And by personally, you mean just instilling him with a hearty fear-slash-respect of you and letting the annoying parts of child rearing get handled by your own woman.

    You briefly consider a world where each goblin is entitled to the sweat of his brow, where the shaman need not fear the Unglorious Anti-Leader, where the rich gob need not fear the stupid shit-eaters! You dream of...

    Well, something. But still, it shouldn't be too hard. Your speargobs are pretty decent with the weapons you salvaged from the corpses in the Bear Cave, and you- yourself- would look pretty badass from atop your bear cub mount. Probably enough to intimidate some yokels, at least.

    Ninetoes looks at you with wide eyes at the deadline. "I, err, yes, Glorious Leader! I was, err, just about to do just that! You want watch?" He asks, the goblin shaman having taken up a staff with some bear blood splashed on the knobbly top. A weird fetish.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:18 No.8702964
    Yes, we'll watch. After we go hunting and scouting, he can prep until then.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:19 No.8702966
    Yeah. They call me Stabber. When I was little I picked up a stick and stabbed One-Eye in the eye with it. I'm why he's one Eye. And I play at stabbing the most, and I once hit a deer in the head with a rock. No lie.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:22 No.8703000

    Ah, we can't ride a bear cub! We have to wait before it's fully grown. I mean, we knew going into that den that training a bear would be a long-term investment, not something with immediate results, right?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:24 No.8703019
    A bear cub isn't near scary enough looking, they'd laugh.

    Now, us coming in on the backs of two fully grown bears, one foot on each bear's back, that'd be BOSS.

    Feed those bears a LOT and make sure they exercise. We want them BIG.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:25 No.8703037
    we should train them to fight against spears, like with not-so-pointy sticks. and "volunteers"
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:26 No.8703049
    Maybe a Bear Chariot? With lots and lots of spikes?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:26 No.8703052
    Bears are really, really big fully grown, and goblins are really, really small. Given that, I propose a sort of bear-palanquin. Why ride the bear bareback when it can be a fucking walking throne?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:27 No.8703054

    Well, bear cubs should get used to us from early age
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:28 No.8703063
    bear is fucking badassery. how do you plan to take a palanquin in the battle?
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)12:28 No.8703065
    The gobs decide to practice their stabbing skill. Promotions = Some of that fancy scale armor your sergeants are wearing! And goblins LOVE fancy things. So long as they're shiny, too.

    Stab, stab, stab. They quickly work on their stabbing technique in the river, attempting to lance fish. It's delicious AND educational!

    You attempt to imagine what an entire village could bring your tribe of sixty. So much delicious food stored by those stupid farmers. And they probably have a blacksmith, too...you could make your own shiny things!

    Your "Chief Scout" and the upcoming Chief Scout are currently looking for info on the Black Lotus tribe, and you have no clue when they'll be back- if they'll be back at all. You'd probably give it another week before chalking them up as carp fodder.

    There's the two particularly successful gobs you have as "new" Chief Scouts. They're kids, but kids are sneaky little shits. You could probably send them out to the village and have them report back in a day or two on what they find.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:30 No.8703079
    The spikes Torg (HAIL TORG!) has blessed us with make it hurt to sit on thrones, so we'd be looking at more of a howdah platform, really.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:30 No.8703081

    Have 'em do that, with explicit instructions that they aren't to interact with the villagers in any way, and that they must not be seen. We need to maintain the element of surprise, here.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:31 No.8703096
    >>There's the two particularly successful gobs you have as "new" Chief Scouts. They're kids, but kids are sneaky little shits. You could probably send them out to the village and have them report back in a day or two on what they find.

    Do this. Most of all they are NOT to be seen or they get to be the bears' training dummy.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:31 No.8703098
    send the sneaky to gather intel about the village. plan a tournament with non too lethal rules to choose the champions among our tribe. they will later train the others so we can speed up the process and have better soldiers
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:32 No.8703106

    Well, given that bears can grow up to 8 feet long and 1200 pounds, I think that a sort of stable howdah that goblins can stand on with spears or bows would be a neat contraption. We can reserve one bear for ourselves, and the other can be a sort of mobile fortress.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:36 No.8703134
    But then the bear couldn't stand up when it needs to.

    How about a system of belts or numerous saddles, so that goblins can grab or jump on and off the bear as needed? (Hate to say it, but like how a tank in Halo has soldiers hop on and off. Only better.)
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:37 No.8703148

    That works too.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)12:37 No.8703149
    As you think of just HOW to utilize your badass bear cubs when they're fully grown, you decide to have them get fed a steady diet of fish. With a quick pen having been constructed out of wood planks from the wagon, you decide to toss them a decent pile of fish.

    Or rather, have one of the more courageous-slash-stupid youths do it. So far, no fatalities, but the kid looks awfully dumb, and one of your own kids looks like he's ready to shove Bear Feeder into the pen with the cubs.

    To keep up with the added strain, you have one of the children join the Fish-Herders splashing in the river. The pond is brimming with fish at this point, and delicious carp have yet to cause any problems.

    Ninetoes bows deeply before scurrying off to his little hole in the warren. As it stands, the speargobs and bowgobs are ready to go out on the hunt. You'll be putting yourself at risk, but the tribe's intimidation by you will be pretty steady with the food you've been raking in.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:39 No.8703169
    Well yeah of course we're intimidating. We killed a bear! And look at these spikes!

    All that food just keeps dissent down.

    It's better to be feared than loved, but we should be managing to do both to a certain extent right now.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:40 No.8703177
    send scouts to village, then enslave village.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:40 No.8703179

    Hunting should be fairly easy, and can continue to garner us respect. Might as well do it.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:42 No.8703190
    we have gold and silver. we could always try useing it to buy stuff. from the village i mean
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:42 No.8703202
    I second leading a hunting party! We will leave the Black Lotus turf alone for now, or just "By accident" skirt the outlying area of it, to see if any of the shits make themselves known. If we kill something in their turf and they find us, we will butcher it and live it for them "As a token of respect to the rightful owners of this land."

    This way, we can avoid turf skirmishes, and even show we are benevolent.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:44 No.8703215

    We aren't buying stuff from the village--we're conquering it and taking it!

    And we'll absorb the Black Lotus clan soon, and add their numbers and stealth skills to our expansion.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:44 No.8703216
    this, after sending the scouts to the village
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:44 No.8703222
    so far our only threat is the Death Lotus, which can also became our most powerful allies
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:45 No.8703232
    We aren't benevolent, we killed a bear and we'll kill anyone who tries to mess with us.

    Don't hit Black Lotus turf for now until we have bigger numbers though.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:46 No.8703240

    That's stupid. If we were to GIVE the gold away, we wouldn't be able to admire it's shininess. On the other hand, if we just TAKE the stuff we want, we get to keep the gold and the food.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:46 No.8703242
    i didnt say dont attack them. we can always kill/enslave them later and get our gold back later. it just might be easier to buy instead of loot at the moment
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)12:46 No.8703243
    You eventually pound the importance of stealth into their tiny little skulls before sending them on their way, a bit of bear meat in their hands and a keen interest in NOT coming back without something important to say.

    You also arrange a small tournament between the "idle" speargobs training. Your glee is infinite as the worg riders finish preparing for the hunt, only mildly distracted as the three non-occupied gobs start bashing one another.

    Unfortunately, goblins aren't much for non-fatal combat with weapons at hand. One of them ends up getting speared through the thigh in the last round of the contest, but the spray of gore (And the kidney that landed amidst the audience of children) provided EXCELLENT amusement.

    Ninetoes took a short delay to patch the goblin up with a brand on the injury site and a rest in the warren before getting back to work on that magic you want done.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:48 No.8703268
    No, better that they don't even know we're there. Then we swoop in by surprise. We don't NEED anything they have, yet. We just want it.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:48 No.8703277
    Have the kids start whacking each other with regular sticks to prepare for REAL training when they're older.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:49 No.8703279
    we should also start the idle kids on spear training. mabey get some craft gobs on sheild makeing.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:53 No.8703347
    Let's get some musically inclined gobs and a smithy while we're at it
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)12:53 No.8703348
    After the tournament is over with, you go out on a quick hunting raid. Riding atop one of the worgs, you, both bowgobs, your personal guards, and Mr. Worgmaster make a quick round out in the countryside.

    You admire the local vegetation only for a short while before coming across a pack of five wild worgs attacking...

    A Black Lotus goblin? Yes! A little bastard of a gob, armed with tiny little daggers, attempting to hold off the vicious little predators. Normally worgs are friends to goblins, but obviously, these worgs will have none of that dickery. As it stands, they have the Death Lotus gob cornered against a tree.

    Oh joy! Meat, worgs, AND a captive! Maybe.

    The thought occurs to you that you MIGHT be able to buy from the villagers, if you show yourself as a weak, unassuming band of well-intentioned goblins.

    Basically, if you act like a bunch of sissy-footing Drow. Who the hell wants to be like the Drow?

    Maybe you, since you're clever enough to only ACT like those pansies, but retain your masculine image whilst giving those humans all your gold and silver and copper.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:55 No.8703372

    Save goblin, take captive, offer choice of assimilation into clearly superior and god-blessed clan.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)12:56 No.8703377
    Establish ourselves as the Alpha in this engagement, keep an eye on the Black Lotus so he doesn't slip away.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)13:00 No.8703413
    You raise your very shiny and well-made axe into the air as your other gobs get the message. Onebrow and Clawfoot, armed with pikes and scale armor, get ready to start making Worg-kebabs. Or gobbo-kebab, if you wish it so.

    The Black Lotus gob, with his stupid little leather hood and his silly daggers, stabs a worg on the snout as it makes a leap at him. The worg retreats backwards, suddenly making wheezing sounds.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:00 No.8703419
    Yes, we outnumber them. These worgs had best realize that we're in charge here. Luckily, we don't need to kill anyone because they're coming with us. And the sneaky shit too. They can eat him if they want, as long as we almost double our worg numbers.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)13:03 No.8703459
    Keeping an eye on the Black Lotus, the "Worgmaster" moves forward on his own mount, noisily thumping his fist against his chest.

    Two of the worgs look to him, turning their flanks on the Black Lotus gob before the Worgmaster tosses some bear meat in their direction. The feral beasts turn their attention to the somewhat-fresh meat, tearing into it as only two worgs remain focused on the dagger-wielding spy.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:03 No.8703465
    Take out the Black Lotus before the worgs. We want those worgs, and having the Black Lotus as their chew toy would make them come with.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:05 No.8703493
    tame the wargs and capture the spy. get intel on black lotus gobs.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:08 No.8703532
    Charge in and assume dominance over the three standing off.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:10 No.8703568
    Do we try and integrate him into our tribe, or intergate him. By which I mean we use a gate, and shove in inter him until he speaks.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)13:10 No.8703569
    The Worgmaster prods his spear into the flanks of the remaining two worgs as your bowgobs take aim at the Black Lotus gob. Holding their shortbows sideways in particularly "ghetto" fashion, they let loose with two arrows.

    Both of which skewer the gob's shins. Now he would inevitably complain about things like "They took my shins!" and "I killed fiddy gobs!". At least, he would if the worgs didn't tear him apart.

    To his benefit, the worgmaster currently has the surviving four worgs (The fifth having collapsed from poisoning) fully interested in him and his mount. Fish is tossed liberally at this point to try and appease the starving beasts.

    The Black Lotus gob is just screaming at this point, his daggers dropped and his hands grabbing at his skewered shins.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:12 No.8703591
    Bowgobs are now named 50 Copper and Ludi'drizzt.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)13:13 No.8703618
    You wave your axe about the worgs as they stare at you with mouths full of fish. Swatting what appears to be the pack leader (Thanks to the number of scars on its snout) over the nose, it growls at you.

    You hit it repeatedly with the butt of your fancy axe until it gets the message. It eventually lays on the ground, burying its head in its paws as the others slink back from your passive-aggressive magnificence. Your own worg mount seems to preen over its new compatriots as it struts around them, giving the occasional sniff or growl.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:13 No.8703624
    Ok, we ask for info, and poke him in his wounds when he doesn't give it to us.

    Oh, and grab us some of them poisoned daggers. Carefully. They could be useful.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:13 No.8703625
    torture intel out of the goblin spy
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:15 No.8703638
    Actually we should gag him and take him back to the warren, and question him in our throne room away from the eyes of sneaky spies.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)13:16 No.8703660
    Looming over the Black Lotus gob, your worg carefully nudges the daggers away. Quite a smart little worgy, knowing just how dangerous they are. This also lets you hold your axe to its neck. It simply continues to whimper as it stares at the feathered shafts sticking out of each leg.

    "Why? Why you do this?" The captive gob asked, now sitting against the tree he was once cornered against. "Shmee not mean harm! Shmee just want, uhh, delicious fish!"
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:18 No.8703680
    Oh, he's near our turf?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:19 No.8703695
    so, you come all this way just for fish? your a bad liar. tell truth or i set you on fire.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)13:20 No.8703713
    Oh yeah. You've only gone a couple of miles out to hunt for food/worgs. This guy is TOTALLY on your turf, gob. You just gun' let him go strollin' in on yo' woods, prob'ly checkin' out yo wimmins?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:20 No.8703715
    Time to cut a deal. He's our new diplomat. He goes back to his clan and tells them if they all want fish, they can join our clan with us as their leader. And then there will be fish. And then we will go take the human village and there will be more food and shiny things for all.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:21 No.8703735
    Oh, and he goes back as is. If he's too weak to make it back with arrows in him, we didn't want him anyways.

    Next Black Lotus we find on our turf who doesn't want to join us isn't getting promoted to diplomat, either.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)13:23 No.8703758
    You easily see through his lies, but decide to be somewhat kind regardless.

    "Shmee...uhh...Shmee don't think Great One will like that very much." He said, looking at the extremely sharp edge of your dwarish axe. "Great One just steal from village...he don't think clan should just kill humans. Co-ex-ist, Shmee think word is. But, uhh, Shmee go talk right now, maybe?" He asked pitifully, looking at you with wide eyes.

    Thank Torg this isn't some sissy-ass alternate setting, where goblins go crying about all the time. And also thank Torg that you ended up realizing something about the Black Lotus: They're cowards! All of them! No Gobhones to actually stomach a real fight against someone!
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:24 No.8703763
    i am fairly sure goblin to goblin diplomacy could be sumed up as "stab them till they give up or die"
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:26 No.8703789
    Co-exist? The wimps! Laugh at the notion! Laugh heartily, and make sure everyone else does too on pain of meeting our axe.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:27 No.8703808
    Cut off his head. Then send it to the Black Lotus village threatening to do the same to all of them.

    Such cowards will be terrified of our tremendous might.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:29 No.8703830
    We can still use their thieving about and their poisons, I suppose. Gotta be clever goblin too.

    Now I don't trust that their Great One won't warn the village about us. Smee instead is going to lead us to their encampment, once we've got a proper war tribe assembled. We're going in and making an example fo the Great One to assert our dominance.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:29 No.8703841
    the only existance we want is the one whare were king of every thing.

    also how old do goblins usualy get? we dont want to die of old age before we take over the word
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:30 No.8703862
    Or they try to stab us in the back with poison. No good.

    We take Smee with us for now. He just got unpromoted for being a weak coward. He'll be our guide very shortly when we march in force.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:32 No.8703881
    Like how they make poison, and tribe numbers
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:34 No.8703915
    taking a spy into our ranks that could escape in the night and give away our position and our ranks and attempt to kill glorious leader? I think not.

    Hold the blade to his throat and ask him why we shouldn't turn him into worg snack, if we don't like the answer it's off with his head to be mounted on a pike to warn all the other cowards of our fearsome might.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)13:34 No.8703921
    You laugh heartily at the idea of living PEACEFULLY with humans! They deserve to be killed, plain and simple! Your fellow gobs laugh along with you, up until you stop laughing. The high-pitched chatter of their cackling fills the woodland as the Worgmaster begins to herd the newly captured worgs.

    You lift your axe back, and swing as though you're about to take his head off. Instead, you bludgeon him upside the head with the flat of the blade, knocking him out. Onebrow quickly gags the Black Lotus gob before throwing him onto the back of his own worg.

    Generally, they live to the ripe old age of thirty-something. With the power of MAGIC, though, you figure you could live on...

    Forever, yeah. Forever sounds good. Your glory will be eternal!
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:37 No.8703962
    Take the little bastard back to our tribe and watch his reaction. If he's awed by our numbers we go absorb the Black Lotus right now, if he's too busy looking at everything like the spy he is we wring all the info from him we can, and then feed him to the bears.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:37 No.8703971
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:37 No.8703973
    How's he going to escape with arrows in his legs? We'll be fine.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:38 No.8703978
    I say throw the snivling little coward gob in a cage with our two pike gobs on guard until we figure out what to do with him.

    When he awakes let him know full well that any attempt to escape will be met with a date with our bear cubs, only missing his hands and feet before hand.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:39 No.8703999
    Only feet, he needs to make us some poison first!
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)13:39 No.8704004
    You DO have him bound and gagged right now, as well as knocked out. You doubt he'd be able to escape from the warren without his precious daggers, anyways. Which you currently have stored on your belt.

    With this accomplished, you lead your worg-pack of six tamed and four freshly captured back to camp. Not exactly the meat you were looking for, but you can easily start with the worg-baby-making and taming now!

    You quickly return to the village to find Ninetoes waiting for your presence. Giving some quick orders, you have five of the children begin training with spears. Spear training, naturally, begins with them bludgeoning one another with heavy wood sticks. It builds up the muscles, you see.

    And it allows for some good betting, too! Granted, all the regular goblins have at this point is fish bones and scant pieces of meat or cloth.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:41 No.8704036
    Good, he's ready for elf spirit summoning!

    Glad to see he's on top of things. Good performers get good rewards. (Even if we don't entirely trust them.)
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)13:44 No.8704068
    As it stands, the little shit is unconscious and bound. But as you drag him into the village, and have two of the pike-armed speargobs watch over him while a crude cage is built with sticks and rope, the children all crowd around the returning party and their prey. One of the goblin children tries to mount one of the feral worgs.

    And promptly gets his left hand bitten off. Stupid boy. But oh well, even as he thrashes on the ground, you know the injury won't end up fatal. Ninetoes just gives the boy a quick application of the brand and lets him scream it off in his own time.

    The worg just swallows the hand in one gulp before being led off by the Worgmaster to the field of pegs.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:44 No.8704073
    i would like to point out that we could enslave the humans to do farming, mineing, smithing and other un goblinsh stuff.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:44 No.8704083
    Now we've got enough wargs to start making a proper pen. Have some idle gobs get to it.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:46 No.8704100
    I pointed that out already, but then we realized it was more gobliny to eat them all, take their things, and use the sudden boon of resources to springboard into a numbers and supplies position to conquer an even bigger settlement.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:47 No.8704125

    have the boy learnt in the arto of accounting.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:49 No.8704161
    oh, i nearly forgot. we should dig a hole, line the bottom and sides with stones. fill it with rats.

    rats eat nearly anything and breed quickly, and as were goblins there should be no problem with eating them
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:51 No.8704198
    We could also use the rats to scare the humans when we attack! Or distract the other tribe when we attack! And they are always good for a little motivation by having rat on kid fight time. You win you get to eat it, it wins well...just don't lose.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)13:51 No.8704200
    With everything going on, you can finally start considering the children fully-grown members of gob society. They're doing pretty much anything a regular gob can do anyways, they're just growing into it.

    So that means there's twelve women gobs just WAITING to be used, abused, and thrashed about in some well-worn bushes. Which means ANOTHER batch of children...and an even larger tribe yet!

    Oh boy oh boy oh boy!

    But still, that means you've currently got seventeen gobs just...SITTING there. You've got the food to feed them, but you've already got five gobs training with clubs (And eventually spears). You've got GOBLINDUSTRY to do...but what?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:54 No.8704234
    yes, this is goblin like. it will also leave us starving to death if we have to seige a city. if we want a good sized goblin hord we will need to feed it and the most reliable way to do that is farm.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:55 No.8704249
    They can start by making a pen.

    The wimmin priorities go to our guards, the gobs who made shaman kids last time (same pairing), the wargmaster, the shaman gets his own, and anyone else we like this time.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:55 No.8704263
    But we have no food problems NOW. So what's the worry? We'll cross that bridge when we burn it.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:56 No.8704267
    scout up and down the river, if there are any larger animals to kill or tame they will be near the water. And as for the humans WHERE ARE THOSE DAMN SCOUTS?!? Someone is looking to loose their dangly bits...ALSO! Reward the good gobs with some WIMMIN time. and build some tree houses to further our territory, but they have to be hidden. So have some of them start on that.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:56 No.8704271
    Seventeen? What we need to do is get them to craft some more weapons.

    And when they have made some more weapons, train with them.

    And when they have trained with them, kill something and bring it back for food.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:57 No.8704285
    make rat pit
    train bore spear gobs
    train craft gobs- make shields,spears,rope, baskets.
    dig out a large common room under the hill, it can be used fo whatever needs doing
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)13:57 No.8704287
    You assign three gobs to work on building the pen. You'll have enough wood, barely, but your wagon-stripping efforts have come to a close. You'll need to start cutting down trees on your own to get it done. You've got ten stone-headed axes, though, so you just need the bodies to USE them.

    Also, you assign four more idle gobs to take the remaining shovels and get to work on the pit. One of them actually has a somewhat-bright idea of putting a wicker grate over the rat pit, and crudely fashions one so you can prevent the rodents from just climbing up and out. Because rodents are sneaky motherfuckers, after all.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:59 No.8704303
    That bright one gets a woman this time around.

    We don't want the rats running through our own camp, after all.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:59 No.8704305
    Take those 10 remaining with us to go cut down some trees. Bring an escort of worgs just in case.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)13:59 No.8704306
    train goblin lumber jacks as well
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:01 No.8704332
    I say now is the time to raid the human settlement, I bet they have more wagons, and barns, and houses, food, and even shinies! And how's our spy doing? Comfortable I hope...not! and also, send out more spies to find out what happened to the last batch of spies...
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:01 No.8704338
    Cutting trees makes noise, leaves signs. Let's take the wood from the human village now that we've got enough for a proper war party.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:01 No.8704347
    We need some more bow gobs. Get some of this kids training. We can use them for huntin.

    Also get some of the new runts making shields and weapons. we need bows and spears and arrows and bashin shields.

    Get one or two of the runts training with the worg herder. as our worg numbers grow we'll need more to run a pen proper.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:02 No.8704356
    I think this one should get some WIMMIN time!
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:08 No.8704464
    we should kill or assimalate the black lotus gobs be for revaling ourselfs to th village
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)14:10 No.8704498
    The party-hard time begins once again as the goblins work on making yet another generation spring up. You currently have the warren's housing, so tree-houses aren't all that important. Besides, what kind of goblins live around TREES?

    You send two regular Gobs out to scour the riverside, and they quickly return to report that they spotted a small group of bugbears a couple miles upstream. Nothing too serious, only six or seven, but they might prove to be a more serious threat. They also report that down south, near the fishing village, there's also a small cabin with a set of piers stretching into the shallow river water. Said cabin appears to have a rowboat lashed to it, and at least two human fishermen in it.

    At the same time, your two ACTUAL scout-gobs return. No sign of those sent to investigate the Black Lotus tribe, unfortunately. The young gobs bow to you as they pant upon returning, prostrating themselves at your feet in the bear cave.

    "Glorious Leader!" One of them pants out, "The humans...found them! Can tell much! Blacksmith...guards...only need ask!"

    You assign the remaining seven gobs to work on basket and shield-making. Unfortunately, you'll need some lumber before they can get some shields carved out. The six diggers in the warren keep their tireless efforts to dig out a common room one level down. They make a nice little dirt ladder as they begin building somewhere for off-duty gobs to chill. Unfortunately, without furniture or the like, it's somewhat...dull.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:10 No.8704499
    Where are our damn scouts?

    need gobs training on bows
    Gobs training to make armor/shield/weaponry
    More spear gobs
    one or two gobs learning to wrangle worgs
    couple more gobs out gettin fishies.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:12 No.8704532

    What are our current numbers. How many do we have ready to fight. Whats our worg status, and how are our supplies. It may be time to take the human village.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:12 No.8704540
    How many total humans? How many are adult males, how many adult females, how many children? We want to eat them all, you see. And nobody escapes to report.

    How many guards?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:13 No.8704551
    How many guards actually guarding at any given time, and how many guards are there total?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:16 No.8704598
    Those scout gobs did good= WIMMIN time after some numbers like how many guards, and the river scouts did good too (WIMMIN time). Then I say, we raid the cabin at night and take all the furniture! Plus more meat! And maybe get a couple of the craft gobs to pull up the dock, tear down the house then load it into the boat and drag it all back upstream. That should be all the wood we'll need for a proper worg pen, and then we can start breeding them right!
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:16 No.8704604
    How smart are bugbears? I'm thinking of a way to get them to be very useful to us...
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:17 No.8704619
    Can Goblins breed with humans? Perhaps instead of eating the women we can use them for breeding.

    Then eat them.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:18 No.8704638
    Give this kid a hook-knife.

    Prepare some worgs for a bugbear raid. We want the fealthy of ALL goblinking, not just the smallest and weakest ones.

    Aks ask Ninetoes about non-shamanic goblin magic.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:18 No.8704641
    Basically, we "team up" with the bugbears to attack the human village. We attack one side, they attack from the other, they get first pickings and we take what they don't want. Well, that's what we tell them.

    Instead, we let them attack, we don't charge in when we're supposed to, they take out a healthy number of guards before being wiped out, and while the guards are distracted with them but still quite thoroughly occupied, we launch OUR attack.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:19 No.8704656
    As the leader, fearless and all that, it might be worth giving that a go. Take one for the team as it were.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)14:19 No.8704660
    Giving the smart one a woman, you grab some worgs and set them to escort the lumberjack gobs. Your two scouts, as well as the entirety of the spearmakers and a single speargob, consist of the woodcutting group. You prepare to send them out in the wild before contemplating just TAKING it from the humans. They're so weak...and fleshy.

    As it stands, you certainly have a large number of gobs under your command. With the Black Lotus spy suitably terrified in his cage, you could cause quite a bit of havoc to either the Black Lotus gobs OR the human village of farmers. Honestly, what could they do? Chase you with pitchforks? PFAH!

    You also think about sending out additional spies to find out what happened to the LAST ones, but it occurs to you that the same fate might befall them as they did the first ones.

    But you're a gob. And so are they. You can always just pop out more!

    What with the lumber problem, you instead work on something more immediately rewarding and assign three of the runts to the "Worgmaster". He is now teaching them the finesse of how to handle large, furred beasts that will sooner eat your head than let you ride on top of them. But hey, when they finally master the art, you'll be able to hold all the more worgs in your herd!
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:19 No.8704668
    Please don't make this goblin fuck quest.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:20 No.8704674
    >>while the guards are distracted with them but still quite thoroughly occupied

    Meant to be
    >>while the guards are finishing them off but still quite thoroughly occupied

    Then the guards who survive are tired and wounded, and we only have to mop up. Our worg riders can run down anyone who flees.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:20 No.8704681
         File1269195635.gif-(1.71 MB, 200x174, 1266299804202.gif)
    1.71 MB
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:21 No.8704701
    Bugbears are seriously big fuckers. I would not be surprised if they take out the village, even if there are only 7 of them.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:22 No.8704714
    We'll just use them to make unholy abominations and then kill them. No details.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:22 No.8704723
    Yes let's make extra enemies of the giant god damn bugbears, great idea. We already have some fucking enemies and now you want the humans and bugbears after us nnnnnnrgh.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:23 No.8704728
    But it is. The quest is to rule everything everywhere with a goblin fist and kill all who stand in our way! and maybe some that don't, just to keep everyone in line. and SHINIES!
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:23 No.8704733
    Then when their numbers are reduced and the survivors are wounded, we mob them and arrow them.

    It really doesn't matter who wins, one side will get wiped out and the other side weakened, but either way it will let us win without too many losses.

    Losses are acceptable of course, they're only gobs, but the fewer we have the faster we can turn around and hit the Black Lotus.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:24 No.8704742
    The quest to FUCK everything... not actually -fuck- everything.

    Ideally, we want fellow goblinoids on our side... it's going to be difficult to get them to follow a goblin, though... even if we aren't exactly normal-looking.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:25 No.8704756
    Enemies? They'll be dead before they can hate us. We just won't mention this little bit of trickery to any other bugbears.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:26 No.8704779
    hit list:
    black lotus goblins
    human village
    humanarmy/adventures sent to find and kill whatever ruined the village
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:28 No.8704807
    Could we get the spy to teach us to make poison and then poison the humans? Then kill them and take what we want?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:30 No.8704827
    >>Ideally, we want fellow goblinoids on our side... it's going to be difficult to get them to follow a goblin, though... even if we aren't exactly normal-looking.

    There's an option for this, but it will be very hard to pull off successfully. Much easier to play them off against the humans and then take out the weakened victor.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:32 No.8704854
    Bugbears would really strengthen us, though, as either another shock force (akin to our worgs and bears) or something to bulk up our infantry.

    Anyway, I think you might be right here Just take what we can get out of them.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:34 No.8704884
    Everyone proposing we let the bugbears rush in and get killed while we sweep in to take the loot: don't you think the bugbears might have the same idea?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:34 No.8704889
    Thing is, it's highly doubtful they'd follow us willingly. We're smaller, why should we give them orders? Not until we have a name for ourselves. They aren't going to be impressed that we killed a bear.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:35 No.8704900
    That's why in the plan we propose, we mention how as soon as they get the attention of the guards, we sweep in and hack the humans' legs out from underneath them.

    Only then we don't.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:36 No.8704910
    Well, if they do, then they are really freaking SMART for Bugbears. I'm not saying that won't happen, but, uh... well if that happens we'll have to take them out, because whoever the SCHMOT GUY is in the Bugbear camp will want to take us out and get himself ~60 goblin slaves.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)14:36 No.8704912
    59 Goblins left:
    2 out on patrol for Death Lotus (Not returned)
    12 women. All knocked up AGAIN.
    6 Diggers working to dig out warren.
    2 Bow guards
    2 Fish-herding
    2 Royal Goblin Guards
    2 Speargobs on the roadside
    1 Speargobs idle (All of which have some basic crafting skills)
    2 Pike-armed speargobs watching over Black Lotus captive
    6 Gobs working on crafting shields, spears, rope, and baskets.
    4 Gobs working on crafting spears
    10 Gobs ready to cut lumber (2 Scouts, 1 speargob)
    4 Speargobs-in-training
    3 Gobs training to be worgmasters
    3 Shamans (Ninetoes and 2 Shamans-in-training)

    You have:
    -25 Gold coins and 10 silver and 30 copper
    -10 shovels
    -A few bolts of very comfortable cloth
    -2 gold wedding bands
    -Ten silver nails from one of the more muscular Elves, who apparently was the one that had the book in his backpack.
    -6 Elven corpses with associated paraphenalia (Clothes, backpacks, some lengths of rope, etc)
    -1 Wagon, almost completely demolished
    -Elf Meat
    -Some goblin meat too
    -Delicious ale, six bottles
    -A few satchels of animal poop for poisoning weapons.
    -Fishing net
    -Fishing hooks

    -10 axes
    -6 slings made from various pieces of cloth.
    -10 stone-headed axes
    -8 wooden spears with flint tips
    -Your battered iron shortsword.
    -2 Shortbows with 40 arrows in 2 quivers
    -3 Bolas
    -4 suits of scale armor (One worn by you)
    -4 pikes
    -1 dwarf axe (Wielded by you)
    -2 poisoned iron daggers (Black Lotus poison)

    "Guards? No real guards. Militia, yes! Militia they call it. A dozen, mo' or less, Glorious One! Armed with shiny iron...and bows." He said, gagging slightly at the mention of such hideous weapons as bows. "With pointy arrows...so pointy. Village has no walls. Wood houses...and lots of delicious babies! So close to eating them, Glorious One...should have nabbed one..." He whimpers, looking at your feet.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)14:37 No.8704928
    You don't have any lumber currently to make weapons, but you'll need to decide if you want to cut down trees (and possibly attract attention) or just steal it from the settlement. You do, however, divert two from the possible lumberjack pool to the stream for fish-catching.

    Bugbears are smart enough to know how to talk, but they're mostly ruled by basic emotions and ancestor worship. It shouldn't be too hard to manipulate them, especially with YOUR level of cunning. They'll want something out of it, though.

    You've heard stories about half-goblins, freakishly tall goblins that can sometimes be used as spies...but humans are so DISGUSTING! They don't even try that hard to claw your eyes out, and they're so flabby, too! Guh....their appearances revolt you, but you might be able to find some deviant goblins to do-the-extremely-nasty in your name.

    You also have the Worgmaster and his trainees get the worgs ready to sally forth. Ninetoes looks to you as you inquire about non-shamanistic goblin magic.

    "Like, err, what, Glorious One?" He inquires, looking to the fetish of a bear claw on a thin wire string around his neck. "There's much your Glorious nature allows me to accomplish...and some it doesn't." He says, "Not to imply you are incapable of doing as you please, though, Glorious One! Your might is infinite, but I am not, O Great Leader!"

    He looks at you meekly, flinching away from your gaze.

    Sidenote: Would you guys mind too much if I went out for about an hour or so? I was hoping to grab a quick bite to eat. I'd continue when I got back, naturally.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:37 No.8704929
    I don't trust em! The think they're better than us because they are taller...and stronger...and it takes ten of us to killl one of them...No, if anything I would set them against the Black Lotuses then team up with them. Jerks'll take our fish. >:(
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:38 No.8704944
    We were going to give Clawfoot and Onebrow pikes and scale armour. Did we do that?

    Also THANKS for writing that out.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:38 No.8704956
    We need to get the bugbears under our sway. I am sure they would be happy to become the elitest of guards for us, one truly blessed by Torg!

    After the bugbears are dealt with, either peacefully or painfully, we attack the fishing hut. But instead of doing it our way, we make it look like the Black Lotus fuckers did it instead! Poison, cowardly stuff. Hell, we have the poisoned daggers. Could stick the guys, run off, let the poison run it's course, then loot the building. When the villagers find out their friends were killed with poison they will go after the Black Lotus tribe. Taking care of those sods will help us greatly, and then the humans will be weakened, enough for us and our bugbear brothers to pillage and loot!
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:39 No.8704978
    >>Sidenote: Would you guys mind too much if I went out for about an hour or so? I was hoping to grab a quick bite to eat. I'd continue when I got back, naturally.

    Dude, food comes first.

    >>So close to eating them, Glorious One...should have nabbed one..." He whimpers, looking at your feet.
    Give him actual praise for obeying our orders to the letter. This one definitely is one of the ones who got a woman this time around.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:40 No.8704981
    Shamanism seems to be natural, so if we want to magic it up we'd have to learn something else. I support seeing what is out there.

    Also sure, take a break.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:40 No.8704995
    >Black Lotus

    Play WH, right?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:41 No.8704998
    Hmmm, boes? If we're going to attack it must be under the cover of night.

    And I'd be fine with a break.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:41 No.8705000

    Unless you have a decent plan for convincing them to work under us (instead of trying to enslave us), I prefer the plan to use them to take out the human village with minimal losses.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:41 No.8705006

    >Ancestor Worship

    We've got a shaman. It shouldn't be too hard to make them believe that their ancestors are telling them that we are the chosen of Torg. HAIL TORG.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:41 No.8705008
    Bows. Silly me.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:42 No.8705034
    the vilagers might not not know about the black lotus gobs
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:43 No.8705046

    Indeed, this one deserves praise. He did as we ordered, exactly as we ordered, even with the temptation of delicious baby flesh so close at hand. Even we would have risked much for such a morsel. As such, he gets a wimmin, and will become our Ranger. It is his duty to master the wilderness, to hone his hunting skills, and become our eyes were we can not go.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:43 No.8705049
    BETTER IDEA: Shaman was going to conjure up the ghosts of the dead elves, right?

    Let's ourselves and the chief scout raid the Bugbear Graveyard and conjure up a couple old ghost leaders. With their blessing and information, we can convince the Bugbears to follow us.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:43 No.8705050
    So awful freaks of abomination are go? Good, good. Probably for the best that we keep our own blood line pure, but the more servants we can get the better.

    How many children do we have, by the way?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:44 No.8705062
    6 Diggers working to dig out warren.
    2 Bow guards
    2 Fish-herding
    2 Royal Goblin Guards
    2 Speargobs on the roadside
    1 Speargobs idle (All of which have some basic crafting skills)
    >>1 Pike-armed speargobs watching over Black Lotus captive (take the other one)
    6 Gobs working on crafting shields, spears, rope, and baskets.
    4 Gobs working on crafting spears
    10 Gobs ready to cut lumber (2 Scouts, 1 speargob)
    4 Speargobs-in-training
    3 Gobs training to be worgmasters

    All of these things can wait when we strike, because these goblins will all be part of the war band. Presuming we have enough weapons (checking now).
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:44 No.8705074
    A lot? We should probably try and thin them out so only the best fighters/most useful are left, soon. No sense getting stabbed by one of our own kids. Leave one weak and loyal one alive to report to us on the others.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:46 No.8705112
    I like this. It's as viable as using the bugbears, either one is going to be a bit tricky to pull off but this poses better long-term rewards.

    Also, easier to get other goblinoids under our sway if we already have some bugbears obeying us.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:47 No.8705134
    >Implying hobgoblins are ever going to not want to fuck us in the mouth with a black iron scimitar

    But yeah, I like it. Go for the ghost summoning.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:48 No.8705146
    Potentially better idea: start having more goblins with rank. Instead of wanting to take us out, the majority of goblins will only want to take out their immediate boss. That leaves us with far fewer gobs (the ones with rank right below us) to have to keep an eye on.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:48 No.8705152
    Can we wreck some human shit now?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:50 No.8705181

    Book Keeper is getting some chow.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:52 No.8705207
    I was going to mention something like this, but I missed the start of the thread.

    Loose idea: Found ourselves into the bearslayer clan, with our wife, kids, the shaman and his wife and the two bodyguards.

    Say you might allow other goblins to form a clan if they accomplish great deeds. Some incentive, and if we get a few clans going it'll have the effect you describe.

    And yeah, more rank. Best spear fighter? He's spear captain now! Best fisherman? Chief fisherman! Shaman is too clever for this, only make him Chief Shaman when the other two are able to cast properly.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:52 No.8705210
    >>implying that at that point they won't have to just suck it and deal because their alternative is death

    Well, you never know.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:53 No.8705230
    Depends what the setting hobgoblins are like. Going by generics, a lot of them would suck it, or just go all out and try and take you down because BANE.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:54 No.8705248
    Less different clans, more different castes. Except that it's a meritocracy, mostly. So things will generally be stable because the ones who get promoted will be able to not get killed for their spot as easily.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:55 No.8705272

    also it would be a lot easier to just kill the bugbears, they will almost certainly try to screw us over in the future.

    my vote is for assimilate/kill the black lotus gobs before they try to ninja us.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)14:56 No.8705287
    Yeah, works for me. I'm just going to mention we want to raid the bugbear graveyard with our sneaky selves and the sneaky scout (should we bring the shaman or just take the bones back to him?) so book keeper knows the plan.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:01 No.8705375
    Well, if their ancestors say that they should follow us because we'll lead them to victory, plunder, and other things bugbears like, then they should be easily enough kept under sway. Especially if we outnumber them enough to mob them (also, bears). They'll be handy muscle as needed, and it would be easy with them to cow the Black Lotus into following us without even needing to kill half of them. Then the Black Lotus help keep the bugbears in check through fear of poison in the back.

    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:03 No.8705410
    and if summoning their ancestors dont work?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:03 No.8705420
    Appropriate: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YdXQJS3Yv0Y

    I think we should try and bind one of the bugbear chieftain ghosts into an item or something. Or a bear (just might be a bad idea).
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:05 No.8705444
    It should, if we capture the remains of their old leaders. We were going to do it with elf spirits after all. Regardless, cross that bridge when we come for it. This course of action doesn't hurt potential other plans.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:05 No.8705449
    That's when we go for the "trick them into attacking and don't help them" plan.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:07 No.8705479
    Has anyone thought of using idle goblins for SCIENCE?

    Also, We're clever enough: I vote we do like Yojimbo and get the Lotus, bugbears, and 'ummies to off each other.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:08 No.8705492
    We're clever enough to get them on our side instead.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:21 No.8705710



    Also, we should pay the bugbears with a jug or two of our ale. That would probably get them on our side.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:23 No.8705743
    Good thinking about the ale; if the spirit summoning doesn't work, then that might be what we need to convince them. Especially since it's strong stuff.

    Would be good to have the shaman practice the summoning with the elves before we have the big bugbear show.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:25 No.8705780
    We need more booze to fill up the bugbears, six bottles won't do anything to hueg monsters, I'd keep it for later
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:26 No.8705795
    It's really potent booze though.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:28 No.8705836
    In that case, use it to get the bugbear leader drunk before we make our deal. Spirit summoning should give us the edge we need to gain authority and get an audience with him/her.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:30 No.8705874
    Also, no one seemed to follow up on this, but some of the corpses in the bear den still had muscle sinew on their bones. Is there some way we could treat it with oil or something and make bowstrings out of it?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:31 No.8705889

    He might consider the deal void in that case.

    Also, I think we'll be able to gain an audience just fine with a force of 60 goblins, plus worgs and bears. No need to try and overcome difficulties where there aren't likely to be any. And booze might not help us there anyways.

    Tricky is the way to do it, not cowardly like the Black Lotus.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:32 No.8705910
    Make sure to dip all weapons in warren cesspit before going into battle (why do we need animal poop to poison weapons when we have our own?)
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:33 No.8705913
    Good idea.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:33 No.8705924
    Why are you so against the spirit summoning? It's not cowardly, it's damn tricky. They worship their ancestors, we're going to steal some bones and ask/force those ancestors into supporting us. Bugbears are huge and mean and more likely to fight than parley, even if we do outnumber them 9>1 (and how many noncombatants?)
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:36 No.8705964
    Sorry, we're wanting the same thing but speaking around each other. I'm for spirit summoning. Just not begging for an audience with booze. We show up, we make our case with spirit summoning, we don't show weakness.

    Because poison works fast, and diseases take time.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:38 No.8705990
    Oh, right.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:38 No.8706010

    What? That doesn't make sense. How is animal poop a poison?

    Also, poop does not cause disease, it causes infected wounds.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:39 No.8706019

    Well, we are currently using animal poo to smear on our blades.

    Interrogate the Black Lotus fucker into telling us how to make poisons out of local plants/What local plants are poisonous to begin with.

    If we could get our hands on some night shade, that would be rocking.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:40 No.8706043
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:41 No.8706053
    1. Breed a shitload of rats.
    2. Put them in a sack then have sneaky gobbo release them in the village at night.
    3. ???
    4. Profit!
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:42 No.8706079

    Yeah. What I'm saying is that we can just use our own poo (instead of going out to find animal poo) until we get poison.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:42 No.8706089

    Here's the way to go. We'll start a discussion with the bugbears by having the most well-geared and armed elite gobboes and worgs guard the shaman who offers the booze and some fish (or maybe the elf-meat) as a tribune, and then the shaman will ask - that since the bugbear alpha is obviously a great shaman as well - if the bugbear ancestors would approve of them joining up with our GLORIOUS tribe as an elite squad of warriors.

    ...but before that, we send a scout to check on their ancestral symbols/totems/other religious items, and craft a wooden fetish from the remnants of the broken cart and the silver nails (maybe wedding bands too) to give to the bugbear alpha after asking him to consult his ancestors. This will make him a premanent fanboy of the tribe, as we obviously revere their ancestors and good manners!
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:45 No.8706132
    I want to conjure up a bugbear ghost secretly before we even think about going to that camp.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:46 No.8706136
    Read again, I didn't say it was. I said that poison works fast, unlike smearing poop which will take a longer time to actually kill something. Smearing poo is better when you want to take down a large force with traps and strikes from hiding.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:50 No.8706211
    This. Why not show up with a bugbear ghost in tow?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:52 No.8706245

    That could be seen as a sign of great disrespect.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:52 No.8706250

    Bugbear ghost or no, we can still convince the bugbears, even if our magic would fail. Propaganda works wonders, especially on simple minds like that of a bugbear.

    But magic first it is!
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:53 No.8706254
    1) We need to talk to the ghost before we make overtures
    2) If we bring a ghost, it needs to be the right one
    3) The ghost has to support us

    This is why we need to sneak in the graveyard and steal some classy looking bones. I just hope our shaman can manipulate spirits. If we can't, my best idea for getting support is to offer the ghost new life - through possession, either of a goblin, bugbear, creature or object.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:53 No.8706261
    Let's see what our shaman has to say about that.

    Likely, we can get all the info on how we should approach the bugbears from him.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)15:55 No.8706311
    Also, I want to go to the graveyard in person, along with our scout. Reason being, who knows what funky shit gets buried there? We must remember to cover our tracks if we do take something, though.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:02 No.8706410
    the bugbears might not have a gravryard/burial area
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:05 No.8706457
    They worship their ancestors, it seems highly likely they have something like that.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:07 No.8706478

    We should be able to find bugbear bones, even so. Crude ancestor worship, so many they have bone jewelry crafted crudely from their ancestors bones? It'd be a neat way to honor them.

    Even if we can't find bones, I'm betting our shaman can pass off a good act of being "possessed" by a bugbear spirit.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:07 No.8706482

    Indeed, ancestor worship needs some way of remembering ancestors even if they don't have graves - like totems or figurines.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:09 No.8706517
    Again, let's see what the shaman has to say about things before we anticipate 100 potential problems and give up on the idea because of it.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:10 No.8706536
    >219 posts omitted
    Two threads tonight, I think? Make sure and archive the second one.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:21 No.8706721
    Ja, is there a second thread yet?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:23 No.8706743
    Well, two people archived the thread at the same time, so there's two threads archived. Never seen that happen before.

    But the OP is not back.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:24 No.8706775
         File1269203071.jpg-(26 KB, 1127x80, GoblinQuest.jpg)
    26 KB
    Nice going /tg/. You must have done that at exactly the same time. First time I've ever seen it happen.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:30 No.8706873
    That's some HiveMind shit with the tagging and description there.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:31 No.8706895
    Not really, they both took from the first thread.

    I'm out, here's hoping Book Keeper comes back.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)16:35 No.8706950
    I'm baaaaaaack. If I miss anything...blame it on the Black Lotus tribe.

    Yes you did, and no problem. It's been a rolling log since the start.

    You do have the poisoned daggers, yes, but do you want to do this plan yourself, or send a lackey to fulfill it? Besides this, you don't know if the fishermen have any weapons (They probably have something for gutting fish, you'd reason.)

    Read lots of fluff, never played anything beyond WFRP, DH, or RT.

    You speak with Ninetoes on these matters. He seems a bit tentative about dealing with spirits that were once actually quite powerful figures. "But..." He eventually concedes, "if your Gloriousness wills it so, I shall have it done. I have enough blood to summon a shade, if you can acquire the bones..."

    To this end, one of the riverside scouts reports something that MIGHT look like the graveyard of the bugbears. There's several large wooden totems around a semi-large clearing not too far from where the bugbears drink. It's rounded by funky-looking stones, crudely engraved. Could be marker stones.

    Could just be a warning in Bugbearese of a buried cesspit.
    Children? They've grown up enough now to be considered adult Gobs, but there WERE thirty six of them. The next batch (You'd estimate somewhere in the low seventies as far as birth rates go) will be arriving in the next week or so. Truly, a glory of Goblin living.

    You quickly start to build up a more organized ranking system. If you only have a few other officers to worry about, you can tell who'll stab you in the back in advance! Not a bad idea at all.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:35 No.8706954
    >Wood houses...and lots of delicious babies! So close to eating them

    Babies for eating? no. baby is just another word for "big, oversized slave-in training who will grow up subservient to Glorious Leader, without any of the ideas of freedom, or memories of thier previous life...

    one of them in 10 years with a pickaxe is worth a dozen diggers... and lots of them means a far far bigger tunnel complex mined out of the earth.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)16:36 No.8706980
    If you want, you can have one of your scout gobs take a satchel full of rats to unleash havoc. He'd be at risk of getting caught by any guards at the granaries or around the town, though.

    Yes, actually. There's a couple tricks Ninetoes knows for that, and he can quickly get the sinew treated so you can begin proper bow production.

    Interrogating the Black Lotus goblin yields a mewling coward of a goblin. How he survived thus far is a miracle, especially in a society where viciousness is rewarded. You twist the arrow left in his right knee a bit to get the lips working, the little spy squealing like a stuck piggy.

    "Yes! Yes! Shmee help! Pleeeaseee don't kill Shmee!" He begs, "Black-capped mushrooms! Grind into bit of water! Stop! Stoooop!" He begs.

    You inquire a bit further with another jerk of the arrow shaft. His screams are a delicious little reward. "Black Lotus...can't...Great One will-"

    You decide to wiggle the arrow around a bit.

    "THE CAMP!" He lets out, "The Lotus...in camp! Please...stop! Shmee...Shmee can't think! Why can't Shmee think?!" He howls, clutching at the injured site.

    And like a dark specter (That is really quite a pansy-ass weakling), I return!
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:38 No.8707018
    We need more wimmins, I want that population growth to go so high, that Torg himself couldn't count that high.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:39 No.8707034
    Yeah, we want to hit up that site with an elite team of shovel goblins. Can goblins see in the dark? Can bugbears? If the answer to the latter one is 'no' then do it at night.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:39 No.8707049
    Hmmmmm... if it's so easy for goblins to increase their numbers, there must be a reason there aren't enough of them to inundate the earth like rats.

    We should be careful of anything that can wipe us out.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:40 No.8707057
    >be careful of everything

    No shit, sherlock.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:40 No.8707068
    I'm just saying don't get cocky.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:42 No.8707096
    We should send a team to take out the shack, and steal that wood 'n meats!
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:42 No.8707100
    ya, thats why im against wipeing out the human town. it will attract whatever pases for the local army and probaly 3-4 partys of adventurers.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)16:43 No.8707107
    You have the six diggers in the warrens, they're pretty damn elite. They carve through a shitload of dirt and don't afraid of making supports out of the dirt itself.

    And yes, both bugbears AND goblins can see in the dark. Ninetoes informs you that bugbears, however, can also track things by scent. Or, at least, can track things by scent a bit better-er than goblins can.

    Not that magic can't fix that problem.
    Well you've got twelve so far, all of which are knocked up with at LEAST six kids apiece. You can hardly ask for much better...until next pop boom.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:43 No.8707112
    >>You speak with Ninetoes on these matters. He seems a bit tentative about dealing with spirits that were once actually quite powerful figures. "But..." He eventually concedes, "if your Gloriousness wills it so, I shall have it done. I have enough blood to summon a shade, if you can acquire the bones..."

    >>To this end, one of the riverside scouts reports something that MIGHT look like the graveyard of the bugbears. There's several large wooden totems around a semi-large clearing not too far from where the bugbears drink. It's rounded by funky-looking stones, crudely engraved. Could be marker stones.

    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:44 No.8707129
    How the fuck does that lake drain?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:44 No.8707140
    Well damn. I guess it doesn't make much of a difference then - if anything, darkvision would make it easier to see interlopers at night. Let's send and send a couple of the diggers there. Cover up their scent and look as best as possible. Shall we go ourselves?
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)16:46 No.8707166
    Generally, goblin stupidity takes care of itself. For example, your goblins would have kept on baiting that goddamn bear until she finally just wiped them all out on her own time.

    But you? You're clever-er. You're the Glorious Leader, and so far you've kept your goblins from doing anything TOO retarded that would get them killed. Or killing themselves.

    This has been discussed several times before, but if you want to send some goblins out, go for it! Just beware that those fishermen probably have SOME means of defending themselves against nature's pests (For example, things like rapist pixies, hobbits, "harlflings", and the occasional group of annoying college students on break).
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:46 No.8707177
    We should get the children play fighting with sticks, encourage/reward hurting others. Good experience for real fighting.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:49 No.8707217
    We've been doing that.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:52 No.8707258
    child raising for all the little goblins
    afternoons-spear/bow training
    evenings- brainwashing loyalty to you or learning to craft
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:54 No.8707290
    also, send out the lumber jacks. if were fighting anyone were going to want shields.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:54 No.8707294
    I think that negotiation with the human town is never going to happen, and this seems like a good practice run. I say get team together and go kill all the humans at the shack! We get all that delicious resources and more wood than we'll know what to do with. Plus a BOAT!
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:55 No.8707306
    BookKeeper, quick, what's the situation with the 2 scouts (one very nasty one whats-his-name?) we send to Black Lotus...

    I might be on to something
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:56 No.8707321
    No word.

    Do this after two diggers and ourselves go to the graveyard in camo.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:57 No.8707349
    again, if we attack the humans we need to be prepared to face a small army and a few bands of adventurers
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:58 No.8707357

    Shit, you reckon they've betrayed us?
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)16:58 No.8707362
    It's up to you whether or not you want to go in person, but Ninetoes assures you that one of his shaman apprentices can easily cover up the tracks of the digging party. The only issue is making sure they dig up the bones in time and don't have a bunch of pissed-off bugbears at their heels.

    You set this up as the regimen for the next batch of kids, but your current batch is already in the work force. My, how quickly they grow up!

    But hey, so far they seem pretty loyal to "Poppa Leader" (Or several variants thereof). Which is great for you, and also helps ease your innate paranoia at having someone dethrone you.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:58 No.8707365

    See earlier in the thread. They'll make noise, and leave signs, and we don't want to be discovered yet.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)16:59 No.8707369
    Probably. If they weren't killed they were captured. It was a dumb move, Book Keeper even told us that.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:00 No.8707404

    Our Goblins dig the fuck out of their graveyard, and leave a trail back to the human village
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:00 No.8707405
    Unless no word gets out, and we take everything--EVERYTHING--with us.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:01 No.8707417

    In that case I suggest taking defensive measures, get a palisade built or at least a ditch.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:02 No.8707430
    What if we fuck with the bugbear stuff, leave tracks toward the Black Lotus tribe and the HIDE the tracks coming back to us? Also: read that book! I think that the stupid elfs are writing bad things about Torg! Plus if we learn to make shinies we can gain that much more power!
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:02 No.8707441
    >>870736 if were far enough away that they didnt notice the caravan attack, the bear fight and us makeing our tunnels then as long as the wood cutters stay away from the human areas they shouldnt notice us
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:03 No.8707452
    We want to recruit the Bugbears, not kill them off. We had another plan for that.

    Right, let's kick it. Us, two diggers and the apprentice shaman we raised.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:06 No.8707507
    Where are we on the map again?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:06 No.8707510
    Alright. Time to grab dem bugbear bones. It's going to be harder to maintain bugbear loyalty long term, than to acquire it short term, but that's a problem to be dealt with later.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:06 No.8707515

    well, lets dig a 6 foot deep ditch around our hill and use the dirt to make a packed earth wall
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:06 No.8707523
    Quit worrying about complicated things like fake tracks, just get in, get the bones, get out.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:07 No.8707536
    Nah, use the dirt from the warren to do that. Going underground is safer than staying up-top anyways.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:08 No.8707548


    you see, that guy we sent was a REALLY nasty motherfucker, I wouldn't be half-surprised if he TOOK OVER Lotus and is planning to overthrow us. I bet he wanted to be leader but we, the GLORIOUS LEADER beat him to it, so now he's jealous of us ... pitiful scum
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:08 No.8707550

    The thing is, if we have a trench and then a wall, then we've essentially got a 12 foot wall for free.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:08 No.8707555
    If we hack down a big enough tree it can give us wood for seasons! But we either drag it back to us or have teams run back and forth leaving a trail from this freshly fallen, beautifully massacred tree right to our tribe. Either way, a path for any human to find us.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)17:09 No.8707567
    They haven't returned. You sent out Lockjaw and the Chief of Scouts...and then they just vanished off the face of the earth. You don't know WHAT happened there.

    Eight gobs, armed with axes, take the war to the trees. Hacking and carving, they begin to chop down two trees in methodical fashion, steadily working at the base. It's back-breaking work, but it's done because YOU order it. And quite frankly, they're britches-browningly scared of you.

    You gather two diggers at your side, as well as Ninetoes himself to cover your tracks. What forces do you want mustered to attack the fishermens' hut?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:09 No.8707573
    We actually knew they were fanatically devoted to their leader before we sent him. It's possible, I guess, but it doesn't make much of a difference. We don't spare the lives of traitors.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:10 No.8707593
    I think we should lead that attack when we come back, but otherwise pick the most battle-happy of our kids and stick him with Clawfoot our bodyguard to lead a group of archers and spearmen.
    >> HEY HEY HEY Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:11 No.8707616
    Where are we in the map again?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:11 No.8707617
    Attack the hut later, it's not a priority. Skip to gravedigging scene.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:12 No.8707634
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:13 No.8707657
    >>Eight gobs, armed with axes, take the war to the trees. Hacking and carving, they begin to chop down two trees in methodical fashion, steadily working at the base. It's back-breaking work, but it's done because YOU order it. And quite frankly, they're britches-browningly scared of you.

    Dammit, we decided earlier to not chop down trees because we don't want our presence to get noticed yet. This was a dumb move.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:13 No.8707668
    simple fix, chop limbs off a tree. then carry them. no draging involoved.

    also if they could find the wood cuters they would have found our base by now
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:14 No.8707675
    What if they have been captured and are being tortured for information? We should get the spy to tell us capture procedure. Then we should go bash the bastards on the head and take the clan. Then the humans. Then whoever they send to figure out where the humans went. I think by then we move the the next area!
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:14 No.8707688
    I say we map the region and find out where we are first.
    After that, we plan an attack and use the loot to buy farming tools.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:16 No.8707708
    If you don't know how to read a map, making one is impossible. It's several times more difficult to make a proper one than to read one. We don't need one anyways.

    Also, farming tools? Are you a girly elf?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:17 No.8707732
    Thing is, cutting down trees makes a LOT of noise that can be heard a long ways away. Not just the chopping, but the trees falling. The absence of tree cover can be seen a long ways away too.

    Bad move for staying low key.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:18 No.8707754
    book keeper how far are we away from the human village?
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)17:25 No.8707868
    Your goblins momentarily halt the axegob work to instead take care of the wall and trench. Loose twigs are made into crude baskets for hauling dirt, and soon enough the warren diggers are offloading the refuse outside to make a small packed-earth wall and a trench.


    Arming yourselves appropriately, you quickly set out for the bugbear graveyard. Or, at least, what you assume to be the graveyard. It's not far from the camp, so you take the two diggers and the apprentice in the interest of stealth. Utilizing what tricks you know, the four of you attempt to slink up the riverbed.

    You eventually wind up within twenty yards of the burial site, and see the totems for yourself. They're mostly constructed of wood or bits of bone, the latter being from several different species. Most of them are made in a crude version of leering bugbear faces, and you realize what the strange stones the scout reported are.

    They're bars of iron. The bugbears, too stupid to realize what the metal was, simply heaved down the heavy material in a rough circle around the site. Some of them scratched crude words into the iron with chalk or just sheer force and a rock. But still, there has to be at least eight or nine bars of solid iron here! Wonderful!

    You also notice a few totems throughout the graveyard itself, most of them bearing crude bronze plaques or having bulky weapons resting against them. Weapons likely once wielded by their former owners.

    Sidenote: Might be back in a few minutes. Have to restart PC due to speaker problems.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:25 No.8707869
    Well, chief of scouts maybe but that Lockjaw fella, who knows what that sneaky gob is thinking?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:27 No.8707906
    Betting now that Lockjaw is the new Black Lotus chief.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:28 No.8707928
    Well, let's dig up one of the well-decorated warrior-looking graves.

    Also iron, but we'll have to wait for that.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:28 No.8707940
    >>bits of bone

    Well dang, we shouldn't even need to dig then. Have Ninetoes pick out the bones he needs, keep an eye out while he does.

    We'll be back later with more goblins to loot that iron in one fell swoop.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:29 No.8707960
    284 posts and 2 image replies omitted
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:30 No.8707971
    Yes we do. Those are not bugbears bones, and even if they were, not the bugbear bones we need.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:31 No.8707984
    I now realize that we should have brought a throwaway gob to use as a runner incase any new information requiring more goblins came up.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:32 No.8708008
    Runner might have alerted the Bugbears. Neat idea, but not that important. We shouldn't be here long.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:39 No.8708122
    DO NOT take anything but the bones. That can wait until we've got the bugbears on our side.

    I'm going to assume the bugbears will want the weapons to remain sacred, and that's fine. Once we have forging capabilities, the iron bars are raw materials. First weapon goes to you (obviously), second weapon, which may require more than one bar, goes to the bugbear chieftain. It's his iron, after all. After that, the weapons produced can signify leadership, rewards for particular great deeds. Not only does the owner get a snazzy weapon, but he could also thereby earn the right to start his own lesser clan within the tribe. This will encourage specialization within tribes, and give a nifty item of office to our champions.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)17:40 No.8708142
    EHP! Missed that question.
    As for where you are...map? What map? You can barely even read, you silly goblin! Why would you need a STUPID human map?

    Your digger gobs were called off before they could actually fell any trees, but they made a couple notches in two.

    A few miles out, no more than a day's travel to get there.

    Ninetoes looks at the bone totems assembled, then points to one with a massive (by goblin standards) warhammer as its center. "That one!" He says, "Strong magic in this area...centered there, Glorious One!"

    He smacks one of the diggers upside the head, "Dig quick now! The blood only works so long! I hope they don't have a shaman of their own...bugbear voodoo baaaaaaaaaad." He says, drawing out the last word as he clutches the bear claw pendant around his neck. He wiggles his staff around as well, waving towards the general area of the graveyard.

    A couple dozen yards away, you can see the group of bugbears in question. They seem to be drinking from the riverbed and taking turns roughhousing. Roughhousing, to them, involves beating one another so hard that even you- a seasoned Glorious Leader- can't help but wince at the sound of fist on flesh. To think of what those muscles could do to a poor Gob like...uhh, NOT you...
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:41 No.8708147
    Why would we want one of those weapons when we have a SHINY SHARP DWARF AXE that is already amazing?

    Also, clans within the clan will lead to major infighting.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:44 No.8708190

    Crown, then. And while there's infighting, it's infighting that isn't against US. It keeps the subclans thinking on their feet, and in fit condition, but everyone's still friendly enough to band together to kick the shit out of some wimpy humans.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:44 No.8708198
    Dig quick, dig quiet, pray to Torg that they have no bugbear shamans.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:46 No.8708227
    alright, instead of cuting down could we just cut tree limbs off?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:48 No.8708249
    Let's just take the finished wood we need from others.

    Goblins don't need shields against humans, those are better for when we take out Black Lotus.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:52 No.8708304
    i am prety sure i read something about makeing shilds out of reeds/grass, could we try that?
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:53 No.8708338
    Why not just go for 2-handed spears? Simple to use, very effective.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)17:53 No.8708351
    You do just that, keeping a careful eye towards the river. The diggers bite in with their iron shovels, churning up dirt to either side as they dig deep. Stupid bugbears, stupid burial grounds, stupid-

    There was a distant grumbling sound as the bugbears broke up. Their apparent leader, wearing a colorful headband of feathers, as shouting something at them. The fighting stopped at this point.

    There was a clinging sound as the diggers struck something. Ninetoes scurried forward.

    You COULD just take fallen tree limbs, but you'd have to forage for the timber. And you'd also need to gather large tree limbs if you want any reasonably solid wood structures built.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:54 No.8708356
    Alright, it looks like we need to prioritise here. Right now, we've got a bunch of things going on at once, and that's causing confusion.

    So, currently our main goal is the bugbears. That'll happen (or fail) soon enough.

    After that though, it looks like we're doing one of three things:

    The fisherman's cabin
    The Black Lotus clan
    The Human Village

    It should be noted that going fisherman's cabin will likely raise the Village's awareness, doing the Village will blow our cover completely, and doing Black Lotus is a risk because of the poison, but doesn't really make future goals harder.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)17:57 No.8708407
    i would say black lotus before anything to do with the humans
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)18:00 No.8708462
    If we do the cabin one night and then the human village early the next morning they won't know what hit them. Then we can loot at our leisure!
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)18:01 No.8708475
    You could, but reeds and the like are pretty flammable. Granted, what the hell isn't?

    Pending PLOT TWISTS, you seem to have a pretty solid grasp of the situation at hand. Granted, chaoticness is what I generally expect from /tg/.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)18:02 No.8708493
         File1269208951.jpg-(26 KB, 700x648, BAshield.jpg)
    26 KB

    Agreed. We need the battle against the humans to be swift and decisive, since there will be a lot of aftermath.

    Also, let's just make wicker shields (should be effective enough against poisoned darts and the like).
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)18:02 No.8708500


    Yeah, Black Lotus sounds kind of like the last way to build our forces, numberwise, outside of building another generation.

    After that, we can work on quality troops. I say once we get the bugbears, we try and get more info out of our prisoner. We've already played "Bad Cop", so let's try (Lying) Good Cop. Patch him up a bit, tell him if he gives us good info, he can get a place in the Clan. And be on the lookout for those poison mushrooms.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)18:05 No.8708555
    so after runing the hell away from the bugbears and sorting out whether or not we will have to kill them.

    we make woven reed shields then attack/assimilate the black lotus gobs
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)18:07 No.8708601

    Sounds like a plan.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)18:07 No.8708602

    This seems like the plan. Get info on them first. Also, ASK IF THERE IS AN ANTIDOTE TO THEIR POISON. It seems likely, and even if he doesn't know what it is, he'd know if it exists, and it could help prevent casualties after our assault.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)18:09 No.8708629
    Seems as though we're autosaging now. New thread time!
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)18:09 No.8708639
    part of the baby gob schedual is foraging
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)18:09 No.8708648
    Working swiftly, you urge the diggers to, well, dig FASTER. Your intimidation gets just that, and soon enough Ninetoes yanks what can only be a bugbear skull from the ditch. The whole skeleton would take too long.

    Unfortunately, the shoveling effort may have taken too long already. A heavy cracking sound can be heard as one of the bugbears blunders through the woodlands. Ninetoes, carrying the skull in one hand, is the first to put his feet to good use and start sprinting towards the riverbank.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)18:11 No.8708672
    If we hit the Black Lotus first, we'd have a larger force to assault the humans with, and would avoid the nasty surprise of coming back from our battle to find the warren burning, the children butchered and the wimmin taken.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)18:11 No.8708685
    Keep up with him! Urge the other two to follow quickly, but keep them from panicking.

    Stupid gobs.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)18:18 No.8708840
    if possible grab the shovels, goblins can be replaced good iron shovels cant.
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)18:18 No.8708847
    Yes. Gobs then humans!
    >> Anonymous 03/21/10(Sun)18:18 No.8708850

    Play it off as a tactical retreat later.
    >> Book Keeper 03/21/10(Sun)18:19 No.8708873


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