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  • File : 1273375005.gif-(115 KB, 1152x965, Dip_Map.gif)
    115 KB Diplomacy (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/08/10(Sat)23:16 No.9699617  
    Hello fa/tg/uys, I'm a regular from /a/. I don't really want to take up much of your time, but I was wondering if you could help me out a bit.

    Over the summer starting next month, I'm going to be involved in one of these bs leadership courses for school and we're going to be playing Diplomacy. I wouldn't really put too much stock into something like this, but depending on our performance, we could be assigned officer status for our honor society and such, and that helps with scholarships, etc.

    I knew a few folks in high school who played it, but I never seemed to be able to get into a game. I was wondering if there was anything you guys could tell me about it? Is it basically Risk on steroids? Any general strategies I should adhere to? Which faction should I avoid?

    What materials should I read? Any example games I could study? Thank you again in advance.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:18 No.9699646
    Google a strategy guide. Don't play it like risk. Don't trust anyone, at all, ever.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:19 No.9699654
    Strategy is : betray your allies before they betray you. Turkey and russia are better.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/08/10(Sat)23:20 No.9699677
    Aw crap. I just texted someone a while ago that if she wanted to talk a possible alliance, I'd be all ears.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:20 No.9699678
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    I FUCKING HATE THIS GAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:21 No.9699703
    Alliances are necessary. Betrayal is mandatory.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/08/10(Sat)23:21 No.9699707
    what makes me nervous is that I haven't gotten a reply yet.

    may have played a hand too early.

    turkey and russia are better, because they are more defensible?
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:22 No.9699721
    that sounds like an amazing tagline for the game, honestly.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:23 No.9699727
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    russia is better because it's fucking russia dude...
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:23 No.9699734
    This is a game that ends friendships and causes knife fights.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/08/10(Sat)23:24 No.9699748
    Duly noted.

    Aw man, I'm scared. scholarships are on the line here!
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:26 No.9699770
    Oh come, come. What has diplomacy ever done to you?
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:26 No.9699775
    Then there shall be blood
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:27 No.9699794
    Then you should know that a good stab is always directed upwards.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:28 No.9699808
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:28 No.9699818
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    I don't know how to finish my turns ;_;
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:28 No.9699819
    this thread is now about stories of how diplomacy ruined our friendships.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:29 No.9699830
    I heard henry kissinger was really into this game.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:29 No.9699836
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:30 No.9699850

    Are you playing ONE game of diplomacy, or several? Because, frankly, if you're playing ONE game, all bets are off, it's crazy, you're going to get fucked, and fucking people first is mandatory. If you play several games with the same group, you'll get to know how the other people operate, and the meta-game means that it's in your interest to never fuck an ally in the first few games, or always tell an ally when you break alliances.

    Why? Because you will develop a reputation as the Trustworthy One, and while everyone else is backstabbing the fuck out of each other, you highly increase the chance of profitable alliances. Until they last game, where you absolutely RAPE your poor, stupid, trusting allies.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:31 No.9699857
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    My mistake, Dr. Henry Killinger.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:31 No.9699861
    I wonder : is france really as good a position as it seems to be ?
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:31 No.9699871
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    That's better.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:32 No.9699874

    You don't get a turn. There is only one turn, Everyone's Turn.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:32 No.9699885
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:32 No.9699886
    Fucking philistine. Don't you know your history? He just helped shape the world during the cold war.

    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:33 No.9699894
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:35 No.9699935

    This is not a joke, you will come out of this game hating people and possibly as an actual murderer.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:35 No.9699936
    Maybe that's why france is historically a very tempting target.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:36 No.9699939
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    and /tg/ shall help you plot victory! thus you have the greatest upper hand available!
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:36 No.9699942
    Heh, who would have thought two people on /tg/ are taking the same course.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:36 No.9699950
    Make sure you bring your magical murder bag with you during each session.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:37 No.9699959
    Diplomacy is odd in that there is no randomization. Everything is strategy.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/08/10(Sat)23:37 No.9699960
    .....very funny.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:37 No.9699964
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    shit just got real...
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:38 No.9699980

    I think this has the makings of something incredibly epic.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:38 No.9699988
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    make that four
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:39 No.9699994
    I thought so. I can't wait to figure out which one you are.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:39 No.9700000
    inb4 OP realizes that /tg/ will provide not advice, but mockery and suggestions for terrible decisions.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:40 No.9700008
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    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:40 No.9700015
    Holy shit, there are other people who browse /tg/ there?

    I call dibs on /tg/'s help!
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:40 No.9700021
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    nice 0's
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/08/10(Sat)23:40 No.9700022
    I'll make sure to be the guy that's curbstomping everyone else with 4chan's best board's help.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:41 No.9700029
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    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:42 No.9700054
    To those who have not played (why are you reading this thread) here is the basic jist of how the game works.

    You have land units and sea units and each one can move one space per turn.

    You can have a unit support another unit in any action as long as the territory it is in is touching where said unit is going (or is stationed if it is to remain and the other unit is to support defensivly).

    You write down all your orders for your units and everyone reads out their orders and goes at once, there is no dice rolling at all.

    Units take territories based on how many units they have supporting them, ties always result in nothing, also failing to give orders to a unit means it sits there and does nothing for a turn.

    You make more units through depots that produce them every turn or so (as long as they are unoccupied, it's been a while so I don't remember exactly how it goes). If all your home depots are captured you are out of the game.

    In the end of course there can be only one winner (unless an alliance decides to forfeit after beating their allies which is basically quitting the game before it is done) so no matter what you don't want your allies to get too powerful because they will become enemies later on.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:43 No.9700059
    Not unless I am throwing monkey wrenches into your plans. All it will take is one thread and a move or two and you will be undone.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:43 No.9700061
    Flattery will get you everywhere.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/08/10(Sat)23:46 No.9700097
    That sounds brutal.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:48 No.9700128
    so does a baby fuck. but its awwwwwright
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:48 No.9700130
    I don't think you are who you claim to be.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:48 No.9700132
    The really brutal part is being brow-beaten for 40 minutes by aggressive "friends" who try and convince you how your current alliance is fucking you up the bum and it would be best to betray them. Knowing full well that the longer they can keep you outside the room the more doubt they can generate from the rest of your alliance and so even if you don't betray them the whole thing has served their purpose anyway.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/08/10(Sat)23:49 No.9700149
    So, fa/tg/uys, if I pledge my fealty to you, will you lend me your power and lead me to victory?
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:49 No.9700154
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    Pic related
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:50 No.9700175
    ...you're not from Chicago, are you?
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:51 No.9700180
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    fffuuck. wrong picture
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:51 No.9700183
    You know, I hear that /b/ is pretty good at diplomacy
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/08/10(Sat)23:51 No.9700185
    Why, whatever do you mean?
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:51 No.9700189
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    I would say sure but its a majority decision

    and i don't get it
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:52 No.9700195

    This is why you talk to people who you're actually allied with via notes, or, now I suppose, SMS, and you only get seen with the people who either can help your cause, or whose cause you need to hurt.

    A lot depends on turn duration, as well. Short turns make things mega-brutal because coordination is hard and avoiding being seen collaborating is next to impossible. Long turns make plotting much easier.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:53 No.9700209
    Just a question. Relevant to my interests, is all.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:53 No.9700213
    We will, but if some other player come and read the threads, you'll be fucked.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/08/10(Sat)23:54 No.9700232
    I think that's an excellent question that I'll pose to the professor, the duration of the turns that is.

    Fucking, saved.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:54 No.9700239
    does it matter? It's not like its cheating and /tg/ keeps to itself mostly so the odds of another player who doesn't know of us won't know of us for a good (possibly forever) time.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:55 No.9700258
    Squa..Friendship Broken!
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:56 No.9700262
    Dip is a fun little game, but Republic of Rome was made by people that found Dip too simplistic.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:56 No.9700272
    play as england, build nothing but navy till you control the seas, conquer france

    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:58 No.9700309
    The odds are low, but the problem is not cheating, it is that (y)our plans will be known.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/08/10(Sat)23:58 No.9700312
    I've yet to determine how to answer this question, as the only person I know in meatspace that could POSSIBLY browse /tg/ is mad at me, and for fairly good cause since I've been an immature fuck for several years (just in case you are who I think you are, this is me apologizing and prostrating myself).

    Honestly, the only others in the class who I feel would pose a challenge to me have probably never heard of 4chan.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:59 No.9700337

    Pay attention OP. Your lessons just got started. You know that brief spike of paranoia you had, just before you rationalized that this person couldn't POSSIBLY be telling the truth? That feeling is now your new best friend. Experience it at every movement, at every message you get from an ally/sucker, at every shift of the board.

    Play every turn with this level of paranoia. Because if you don't, your ass is getting shanked.
    >> Anonymous 05/08/10(Sat)23:59 No.9700340

    The two big questions are duration of turn, and whether the class will be playing multiple games or one long game. They both change the dynamic a lot.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:00 No.9700358
    You could have just said 'Yeah, I'm from Chicago' and damn the consequences.

    You will definitely enjoy this game.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:01 No.9700365
    >have probably never heard of 4chan

    you would be surprised. 4chan isn't a secret clubhouse any more.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:01 No.9700372
    Oh god, the intrigue is already killing me.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:01 No.9700373
    Hey, /tg/, what's you first moves for each starting position ?
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)00:04 No.9700419
    Granted, but I take the quality of an individual board is directly related to it's obscurity.

    I can already feel the difference in powerlevels between here and daytime /a/ and /b/.

    And...yes, I'm from Chicago. This thread has become a lot more...real, all of a sudden.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:05 No.9700438
    That guy that said paranoia is your new best friend? Listen to him.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)00:06 No.9700443
    Duly noted.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:08 No.9700477
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    You, Piedmont, 1901, make it happen.

    You, A beer, Spring 1906, that's when the game starts.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:08 No.9700485

    So, you go to Wilbur Wright College, right?
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:10 No.9700503

    For the record, and so you'll learn - the fact that you were reticent to say whether you were from Chicago already gave you away. If you hadn't been, you would have denied it immediately, because there was no reason not to - knowing you come from Some Other City is not information you'd bother to protect.

    Therefore, you paranoia there was ineffective. You need better paranoia.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)00:10 No.9700505
    I second this, as it's actually relevant to my interests.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)00:14 No.9700566
    Actually, I believe my first actual mistake was using a familiar trip/online persona.

    my second, was mentioning my professor's name.

    my third was the reticence. at that point, I recognized that I had been had, so there was not much to do at that point.


    [spoiler]Hi N-------. I'm sorry I've been an asshole.[/spoiler]
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)00:15 No.9700573
    FUCK! Spoiler tags don't work here.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:15 No.9700574
    Twisting the twist.

    Right... so someone knows you are from Chicago.

    I think someone here has a friend who is also involved in this game.

    So any secrets in this thread (and likely future threads) are compromised.

    Consider playing this to your advantage.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)00:16 No.9700597
    That is an excellent point.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:17 No.9700618
    this has suddenly become the best thread of the night.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:18 No.9700625
    Actually, a Google search for J. Helwink links to Richard J. Daley College in IL.

    It's likely that someone is just fucking with you.

    Therefore, it's certain that there is a mole amongst us!
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:18 No.9700631

    Actually, your first mistake was thinking /tg/ would help you. Then all the other things.

    You are now aware that every piece of advice might be someone else in your class, skewed ever-so-subtly to lead to your doom. Manually.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:19 No.9700638
    Turkey / Russia - You will always move into the Black Sea, one needs to make an agreement with the other to ALWAYS go into the Black Sea and bounce each other out. Once one side looses the Black Sea, they are out of the game.

    France / England - Create a "no fly zone" in the English channel, if your opponent moves a fleet into this god forsaken crater destroy them, it is a declaration of war.

    Italy - Venice to Piedmont, Rome to Tuscany, Naples to TYN

    Russia - SVP to Black Sea (see above), Warsaw to Silesia, StP to Bot take Norway at all costs.

    Turkey - Ankara to Black Sea (see above), Smyrna to Aegian, Con to Bulg make the Balkans your bitch.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:19 No.9700641
    oh ze intrigue! she kills me!
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:19 No.9700645

    Aha! And that is where you are wrong. BOTH Richard J. Daley College and Wilbur Wright College are possible results! I was trying to trick him into admitting which one it was.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:19 No.9700651
    Holy shit, this has become Diplomacy IRL.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:21 No.9700675
    And that is why /tg/ is God Tier.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)00:21 No.9700676
    There is only one way to prove this person knows me.

    What is the first letter of my name?
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)00:21 No.9700684
    wait, that might not work...
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:22 No.9700694
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:22 No.9700695
    Convince France to ferry liverpool to portugal via my f eng chan and f mid atl.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:22 No.9700696

    And having learned from the Chicago question, he realized that neither answering nor choosing not to answer would save him. The only winning move is not to play.
    >> SquashMonster !!YzKAMLHEhyW 05/09/10(Sun)00:22 No.9700697
    England - do not fuck with France; every game where the two try to fight eachother ends badly for both. Demilitarize the English channel, but do it very carefully and always be ready to defend if France enters the channel, because that French fucker is going to backstab you. England has an easy time lasting long into the game but a very had time winning. Most Englands fuck around in the Nordic and low countries without ever getting anywhere: do that but be ready to convoy drop shit into Germany or Russia when they're weak. Don't forget that Norway and St Petersburg are neighbors by land.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:24 No.9700712
    inb4 OP becomes aware that Diplomacy players on /tg/ are backstabbingly cruel enough to stalk him online, find out the class, and offer to sell his plans and advice received to The Enemy.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)00:25 No.9700724
    despite my elevated heart rate here, I just have to tell you guys that I'm loving every moment of this.
    >> Evil !!Oo43raDvH61 05/09/10(Sun)00:26 No.9700736
    I remember playing a version of this game in a history class in high school, except we made it cover the whole world. Everyone started in Africa and migrated across the world to the land they wanted to settle with random dice rolls. I picked what would later be known as Assyria and had to on a team all by my lonesome because fuck everyone else.

    It is also important to note that the orders were dropped in a locked box and it was a turn a week. As it came to the climax of the semester the Greeks had gone nuts and taken over Palestine and Egypt and threating Rome and other Balkan states and I only had the time to amalgamate Persia. Short story I was horrendously fucked because they made deals with them and not with me. However, right after class when I was putting my orders in the box to fight the very best fight I could I spotted a slip jammed in the slot. With my own slip I fished it out, which was tricky because it was folded in half and hanging on to the lip of the slip inside the box just barely. In the slip was detailed all of Greece's orders for that turn. They had been manoeuvring to attack me, so I had the ultimate advantage. I made a deal with Greece's neutral neighbours showing how they were defending their western front that turn.

    In one turn Greece got Raped and soon after destroyed utterly. I quickly took control of Egypt and Palestine and controlled the entire middle east by the end of the year when it came to its conclusion. I then told the people playing Greece why they lost (they just couldn't believe what happened) and there was much rage. Myself, I wish someone took a picture because it was the holy grail of troll faces I was wearing.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:26 No.9700740

    It is entirely possible you may like playing Diplomacy, then.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:26 No.9700741

    Me too.... DAVID.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:26 No.9700743
    Come to think of it, I'm taking a trip to Chigago soon...
    >> SquashMonster !!YzKAMLHEhyW 05/09/10(Sun)00:26 No.9700748
    France - do not fuck with England; every game where England and France fight ends badly for both. Demilitarize the English Channel slowly, but be ready for that English fucker to backstab you at any time. Invading Italy is easy, but takes forever. Invading Germany is faster, but England, Austria, and Russia will all want a piece of it. France is one of the strongest countries; if you can take the entire Iberian peninsula (don't let England or Italy tell you they need it) and secure at least one good alliance with a neighbor, you can do very well.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:27 No.9700759
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    Stop guessing peoples names and attracting attention from people just passing by when they see their own name.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)00:27 No.9700763
    That, good sir, was enthralling.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:27 No.9700768

    Austria - Get ready for a hard game, you are going to be butt pounded most of it. Budapest to Rumania, Trieste to Adriatic do some sabre rattling with the Italians form alliance with them and Turks or Russians, Vienna to Tyrolia to take Munich or Venice in the Fall. Russia will roll up into your hood be cool you have to be the Austrian Fonzie and be cool.

    Germany - Munich will rise and fall about fifty times this game, get used to it. Munich to Burgundy, Berlin to Prussia, Kiel to Holland. Denmark will also be a smoking crater by the end of this, give it away every chance you get because two years later someone will take it; shits like the Harrenhal of Europe.

    France - Brest to the Midatlantic to take Portugal. See previous post about pissing in England's tea. Paris to Picardy for Belgium, Marseille to Spain. Turn two go back into Marseille with luck the Italians in Piedmont will think they are smart and roll in, bouncing you back into Spain and defending Marseille. This works great on new players.

    England - Edi to the North Sea, make Norway your bitch, people forget it's connected to StP, LVP to Edi get ready for the convoy, London anywhere but the channel.
    >> LaBambaMan 05/09/10(Sun)00:28 No.9700773
    I love the mentality of "play diplomacy if you don't want to have any friends" because it makes me wonder what kind of weird ass people you guys hang out with that stop being your friend over a game of Diplomacy. Me and my buddies play it plenty, and the betrayals are always hilarious.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:29 No.9700787
    What about Germany and Austria? Just bend over and kiss your ass goodbye? Or make a pact with the other because that's literally the only way to survive the impending dickings from every direction?
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:29 No.9700791

    I got my buddy, I will trust him with my car, my computer, and a months worth of rent; I will not trust that cocksucker with Belgium though.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:31 No.9700808

    Talk people into helping you gang up against the other. As an intercontinental country you are going to get ass raped so hard; you will literally have whole battalions up in there. Either get them to commit against the other guy, or lube up.
    >> Evil !!Oo43raDvH61 05/09/10(Sun)00:31 No.9700810
    My pleasure, it has made my night maybe week just remembering that happened at all.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:31 No.9700819

    I would totally have picked the lockbox or stolen the key. And I would have defended that action as being in the spirit of the game.

    In your case, I would have altered Greece's orders, and defended that as being in the spirit of the game.
    >> SquashMonster !!YzKAMLHEhyW 05/09/10(Sun)00:32 No.9700830
    Germany - being one of the middle countries sucks, but you're the least shitty one of them. Try to get Italy or England (or both!) to fight France; it's harder for you to invade than Austria and Russia. Don't trust England too much, because you're the only country they can invade remotely effectively. Try to get Turkey to attack the same country as you. If you get England/France to fight, Italy/Austria to fight, and Turkey/Russia to fight, which is an incredibly common way for things to play out, you're in an amazing position.
    >> Evil !!Oo43raDvH61 05/09/10(Sun)00:33 No.9700858
    Nah the teacher was watching me do it. To prevent that from happened he would always take the box away after class with him to his house. Another awesome part his only sage words were, "Excellent."
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:35 No.9700887

    Well, if the teacher watched you do it, I would TOTALLY have altered the orders. I would have turned to the teacher and said "These are the orders his troops are receiving, see?"

    And we would have laughed together at that poor Greek bastard.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)00:35 No.9700889
    For the record, I'm bookmarking the easymodo thread.

    you guys are the best.

    and Nick (or Justin/Jessica?; Justinica?), I've been an immature and depressed prick for years. not much more I can say than that. but then again, I probably always say that.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:35 No.9700890
    I'm playing this with friends whentheyget back from college because of you, /tg/

    how drunk will I need to get them to forgive me?
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:37 No.9700905

    ... what easymodo thread?
    >> SquashMonster !!YzKAMLHEhyW 05/09/10(Sun)00:37 No.9700916
    Austria - Fuck being Austria. You need Turkey's help to fight Italy or Russia. You will not get a decent chunk of Germany unless by a major backstab. Turkey is too far away for you to attack without getting raped, even if it's your "neighbor". The fact that Germany/Russia and Italy/Russia never happen is really the only reason you'll survive. You can probably last forever by dicking around in the Balkans, but if you get to that point it's unlikely you'll make a comeback. On the other hand, if you can last fairly long into the game without becoming a non-power, there's a ton of supply centers around you, so you can explode in size as soon as someone lets you.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:37 No.9700918

    Get them as drunk as possible, and secretly stay sober. That way you gain the advantage.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:38 No.9700921

    >> Evil !!Oo43raDvH61 05/09/10(Sun)00:39 No.9700935
    I could have, but then that would have given away the opportunity to make them shit themselves by giving the impression that I was a massively superior strategist by countering and annihilating their overwhelming army completely. They would have got their last turns orders back to make sure they were followed through correctly and seen it was altered and not in their hand writing.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:40 No.9700952
    Diplomacy taglines:

    >Alliances are necessary. Betrayal is mandatory.

    >I got my buddy, I will trust him with my car, my computer, and a months worth of rent; I will not trust that cocksucker with Belgium though.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:41 No.9700965

    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:41 No.9700967
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    Look up the old AH strategy guide. Knowing about things like stalemate lines and the fun of convoys will give you an advantage.

    Your friends will detect this and wipe you off the map; this is Diplomacy.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:44 No.9701001

    well this is how we game at our risk parties

    cell phones out, mouths closed, poker faces on

    2 hours later someone get run out of the house and thrown into the pool

    2 more hours and the table get flipped and we all go home pissed

    the next day is usually something like fumbly rumbly where we take out that agression on one another

    i can only imagine diplomacy ending much worse
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)00:44 No.9701004
    AH strategy guide? Also, noted.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:45 No.9701021
    Once got a ten-minute blowjob for teaming up on Russia. Sided with the Russians anyway. Girl flipped her shit, but couldn't explain why to anyone. Hilarious.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)00:46 No.9701030
    I fucking lawled.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:47 No.9701036

    God-tier dickery there. Good job.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:47 No.9701043
    Avalon Hill had the license to publish the game for a long time, they collected a lot of stuff in a guide and sold it as a supplement.

    Jesus H Christ, Edi Birsan is writing for WOTC now. That shit takes me back.

    Any other Dip oldfags around?
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:47 No.9701044
    My good sir, you are my hero. Should have gone for more though.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:47 No.9701045

    >> SquashMonster !!YzKAMLHEhyW 05/09/10(Sun)00:47 No.9701046
    Italy - Statistically, Italy is the worst country. I'm sorry. If you last into the mid-game your chances of winning sky-rocket, but I suspect that's because only pros last that long with Italy. Don't convoy to Tunisia, just put a ship there: everyone comes up with that brilliant plan: it's shitty. If you use navies and concentrate on one side at a time, it's pretty easy to get a bunch of early supply centers, but actually properly invading someone will require armies. It's probably best to wall off your northern front with armies then swarm either the Iberian Peninsula or the Balkans with navies, and build an occupational force with the extra armies. The easiest way to defend your northern front is to get Piedmont and Vienna armied, then repeatedly do Piedmont->Vienna and Vienna->Tyrolia by convincing Germany to bounce an army from Munich off yours in Tyrolia. This stops Austria and France from attacking without naval support; Austria can support his own attack into Tyrolia to stop you, but it'll freak the fuck out of Germany and net you an ally.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)00:48 No.9701053
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:48 No.9701058

    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:49 No.9701078
    If she was that desperate, should have held out for more.

    Or just renegotiated the terms at the table, before you actually carried out the backstab.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:51 No.9701107

    "We have 15 minutes of anal, I give you support on Russian front."
    >> Evil !!Oo43raDvH61 05/09/10(Sun)00:52 No.9701124
    "You're fucked either way."
    >> Syrnn 05/09/10(Sun)00:52 No.9701133
    Good god, where are you Chicago Diplomacy players? The north suburbs sucks something fierce for gaming!
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:54 No.9701170
    Honestly if she was willing to do that, she probably wanted to give the blowjob anyway.
    >> SquashMonster !!YzKAMLHEhyW 05/09/10(Sun)00:55 No.9701179
    Turkey - Don't fuck around in the black sea; it's even worse than the English Channel. If you want to invade Russia, you need to flank the sea first. The shit you can pull in the Balkans is hilarious and profitable, but it'll piss off everyone. Fighting Italy sucks, but trying to fight someone else while Italy tries to fight you sucks even more. If Italy tries to attack you, get an alliance with someone and hopefully everyone will be glad not to have to deal with you. Pay very close attention to Russia's gains elsewhere, because he tends to grow in sudden bursts and can mount a fairly effective invasion with just two new units. An actual, stable Turkey/Russia alliance will wipe the board clean, but it'll never happen unless Russia's your fangirl or something.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:55 No.9701183
    Nah. Five in the front door, five in the back, five user's choice. That's the best deal to ask for here.

    Now, if she wants enough foreplay to get her ready for it, that would cost her at least one supply depot.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:58 No.9701236

    That really was the renegotiation. I forget how we got there, exactly, but I said something like "you realize, the only way going to stick with this plan that long is if you fucking blow me." As in, not gonna happen. That led to "after game", which got her one round, at which point I pointed out that we both knew she was going to hang me out to dry, then not follow through. That got me the quickie BJ.

    That got her another turn, after that I tried to push for more, got the feeling I wasn't making any more headway (haha), and threw her under the bus.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)00:58 No.9701243
    all this advice is golden. it's good enough for me to have missed fullmetal alchemist just now. (remember, f/a/ggot here).
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)00:59 No.9701261
    Norway, Denmark, Holland, Belgium, Spain, Portugal. Why you can't simply fleet spam.
    >> SquashMonster !!YzKAMLHEhyW 05/09/10(Sun)01:01 No.9701285
    Russia - You have extra starting armies, and that's amazing. You're also huge and hard to defend, which is less amazing. Any way you can get an opponent off your back is a good one. Unfortunately, the countries you least want to tangle with, England and Turkey, are the most capable of a surprise attack. Do not let your opponents surprise attack you from Armenia or Norway. Germany and Austria will be eager to get an alliance, but will backstab you as soon as the other looks weak. Be willing to let them have Warsaw, it's impossible to be effective while keeping it properly defended; instead, just make sure you're always ready to counter-attack. Turkey is the best possible alliance, but you'll never pull it off.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)01:01 No.9701289

    You're welcome.

    But seriously, all the time you have to think is a blessing and a curse. This game will EAT your brainspace. Be careful not to over think situations in the midst of RAMPANT PARANOIA.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)01:03 No.9701311

    You sir are wrong, the Mending Wall is specifically about Tukey / Russia and the Black Sea. Just tell the person you are going in there every turn. The moment he thinks you are not, or gets complacent you take it. No need to be enemies, just know that is what is going to happen. Russia is okay loosing the unit, and the Balkans are so rich with supply centers, Turkey is okay too.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)01:03 No.9701317
    This thread has definitely proven that with the SUDDEN APPEARANCE of an old friend.
    >> SquashMonster !!YzKAMLHEhyW 05/09/10(Sun)01:10 No.9701437

    That's it for country advice. Other (hilarious) stuff that's come up in the thread:

    sexual favors - if someone offers you a blowjob or something, accept (assuming any moderate level of desirability). Keep your word on this - nobody is devious enough to offer you sex to help them and then backstab you anyway, and if they are, they deserve to win. Provide them with enough help to improve their situation but not enough that they can continue without you or provide a threat to you, then extort them for more. The more sex you get out of someone, the less likely they are to throw out that investment they've put into it.

    alcohol - the "get everyone drunk and stay sober" method does not work. Get at least one ally to be sober with you. Play drunk by being agreeable and loud. Make loud fake plans with your fake teammate. Without a sober ally you turn the game into a crapshoot; if you have any skill it should be better than a crapshoot without the alcohol.

    forgery - if you forge England's orders and turn them in at the end of round, that's bad sportsmanship and you should be kicked out. If, on the other hand, you forge England's orders, tell France that England let you turn his orders in for him as a sign of trust, and show France the forged papers, that's entirely legitimate. This same ploy works even better if England is in on it.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)01:16 No.9701518
    That is sage and hilarious advice. All of it, duly noted.

    You guys rock. I'll be back in a few weeks and tell you guys more.

    And Nick, feel free to stop by the office sometime. We can talk like old times. Or not, if you don't want to, you can feel free to berate me instead. At the very least, I can probably give you scholarship advice.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)01:18 No.9701542
    I don't need your advice. Dick.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)01:19 No.9701551
    Sex discussed as a diplomacy tactic
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)01:23 No.9701608
    >implying anything is off-limits when it comes to Diplomacy.

    OP - find out if the other players have beloved pets or possession. This information comes in very handy during endgame.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)01:23 No.9701616
    will do.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)01:26 No.9701648
    >Not Conquerable

    >Has movement path to it

    This is the shit I always hated about this game.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)01:29 No.9701696
    In a game without America to stage convoys with, who gives a shit about Iceland?
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)01:30 No.9701705
    Just a pet peeve.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)01:32 No.9701733
    It's cool, bro.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)01:34 No.9701781
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    I actually have a pretty good story with that. My very first game of Diplomacy ever I was playing with Italy, while at least three other players were fairly seasoned. Needless to say, I screwed up badly. However, I screwed up so magnificently that I still remember it to this day. I marched my army north and conquered a bloody swathe through central Europe as my foes were eating up my territory behind me. My army just kept moving, marching, and conquering all the way through Europe until my last province was Syria. Here's my path, best as I can recall.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)01:39 No.9701835
    that's pretty magnificent.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)01:41 No.9701861

    If I recall, Germany won by promising not to focus on the Russian front before invading Russia anyways.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)01:43 No.9701895
    Oh, I wasn't dismissing sex as a diplomacy tactic. I was noting that you suggest using it to build a long term relationship of trust, before betrayal.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)01:43 No.9701901
    Isn't that how sex works anyway?
    >> SquashMonster !!YzKAMLHEhyW 05/09/10(Sun)01:45 No.9701915
    Long-term relationship of trust? I'm really more suggesting using it to build a long-term relationship of abuse and extortion.

    Your way makes me sound like such a good person. We can't have that; there's diplomacy to be done.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)01:45 No.9701919
    just don't bring that up during alimony.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)01:47 No.9701954
    >I'm really more suggesting using it to build a long-term relationship of abuse and extortion.
    >relationship of abuse and extortion

    Is there another kind?
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)01:54 No.9702053
    To make abuse and degradation look like trust and love is the perfection of diplomacy.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)01:55 No.9702078
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    Oh, /tg/, I had no idea you were so familiar with bedroom politics while remaining so utterly unfamiliar with sex of any kind.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)01:56 No.9702080
    So, I'll probably be back on some other saturday night.

    goodnight, fa/tg/uys!
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)01:57 No.9702108
    Lesson of the night:

    Diplomacy is the art of getting a chick to suck your cock till a better deal comes along.
    >> (vucub caquix) ლ(╹◡╹ლ) !5S3TFtv/Qo 05/09/10(Sun)01:59 No.9702153
    Duly noted.
    >> Anonymous 05/09/10(Sun)02:23 No.9702494

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