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  • File : 1304132015.jpg-(115 KB, 594x778, spiffy1303235354330.jpg)
    115 KB Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/29/11(Fri)22:53 No.14758819  
    "Subject lock confirmed, engaging psychometrics in 3, 2, 1..."

    >You've been asleep for a long time now...

    "Psyche induction confirmed. Libido reaction holding at 0.2, destrudo value negligible."

    >But now you're being called back from this blackness

    "Potential barrier cleared. All parameters are within optimal ranges. Initializing Lazarus process phase 1."

    >You did not go unremembered during your long sleep. History immortalized your name.

    "Subject soul quantization complete and normalized to real space. No abnormalities detected. Moving to phase 2."

    >Who were you?
    >Pick an important historic figure (military background preferred).
    >Consensus is preferable but not required.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)22:54 No.14758832
    Teddy.

    Motherfucking.

    Roosevelt.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)22:54 No.14758833
    Hitler.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)22:56 No.14758844
    George S. 'Motherfucking' Patton.

    OR

    Sun Tzu
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)22:57 No.14758853
    Caligula.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)22:57 No.14758855
    Nikola Tesla
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)22:58 No.14758862
    >>14758832
    And we are off to a sexy start.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)22:58 No.14758863
    Hitler
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)22:58 No.14758864
    Gilgamesh.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)22:59 No.14758867
         File1304132352.jpg-(134 KB, 1070x1111, tg - Grover Cleveland.jpg)
    134 KB
    Grover Cleveland, obviously.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)22:59 No.14758871
    >>14758855

    Seconding Tesla
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)22:59 No.14758874
         File1304132394.png-(432 KB, 453x700, Fuck-yeah-Teddy-Roosevelt.png)
    432 KB
    >>14758832
    Bully!
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)22:59 No.14758875
    I vote Teddy or Tesla.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:00 No.14758876
    Gonna second Nikola Tesla here.
    >> noko Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:00 No.14758879
    This techno-babble. It sounds very Eva... and I like.

    Also, vote for Tesla.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:00 No.14758882
    >>14758832

    Fuck yes, bring on the Big Stick!
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:01 No.14758888
    We are the amalgimation of Teddy Rosevelt and Nicola Tesla.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:03 No.14758900
    Nikola Gagarin Roosevelt
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:03 No.14758901
    TEDDY NICOLA TESLAVELT

    >> they merged souls in the after derp
    >> Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/29/11(Fri)23:03 No.14758904
    rolled 59 = 59

    "Power spike detected! Libido reading is off the charts! Engaging ego containment."

    >Rolling...
    >1 to 40:Teddy Roosevelt
    >41 to 80: Nikola Tesla
    >81 to 100: Fusion of the two
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:03 No.14758910
    Lo, and /tg/ did become divided between those in support of Roosevelt, and those under the banner of Tesla. And there was a great schism between these two proud peoples, for neither would back down from their stance that the other was the superior man. So came the End of peace amongst all elegan/tg/entlemen, and Strife did fester within its once-hallowed walls.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:04 No.14758915
    >>14758904
    Tesla it is. Bring on the electro-awesome.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:06 No.14758922
    >>14758904
    Alright then Tesla it is.
    Let's get some SCIENCE up in this bitch and hopefully this time people won't steal and profit off of all of our ideas.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:07 No.14758931
    >>14758910

    The first 'War of The Personality' claimed the lives of countless individuals. Moderators on both sides of the conflict imposed harsh banishments, until finally, their stockpiles of responsibility dried up, leaving behind those few survivors who would continue the battle for dominance.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:07 No.14758933
    Frank Poole
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:08 No.14758941
    >>14758904
    BREAK OUT THE PEACE RAY, FOOLS. PARTICLE PROJECTION CANNONS UP IN THIS MOTHERFUCKER.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:08 No.14758948
    Man, I was hoping for the Teddy-Tesla hybrid. Oh well, bring on the SCIENCE!
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:09 No.14758958
    >>14758941
    >PEACE RAY

    I assume it brings about peace by incinerating everyone who opposes you?
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:13 No.14758995
    >>14758958
    It's a supposedly existant weapon offered to the USA- a real life death ray, AND THEY DIDN'T BUY INTO IT- which basically electromagnetically projects particles of plasmafied mercury (or tungsten) DEATH. He had it all drawn up and just needed funding for the project and assistance in some unrealized (practically, at least) parts of the machine. It was dubbed the 'peace ray' because with it, he claimed that all war could be ended, because noone could or wanted to face such horrors.

    MAKE SUPERWEAPON; WORLD PEACE GET!
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:14 No.14759007
    >>14758995
    >It was dubbed the 'peace ray' because with it, he claimed that all war could be ended, because noone could or wanted to face such horrors.

    Tesla did not understand people.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:15 No.14759015
    >>14758995
    Aren't there rumors that Tesla was responsible for that Tunguska Explosion?
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:16 No.14759027
         File1304133407.gif-(1.03 MB, 250x187, AAAAAAARGH.gif)
    1.03 MB
    >>14759015
    OH GOD THE RUSSKIES HAVE THE PEACE RAY DON'T THEY
    >> Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/29/11(Fri)23:17 No.14759032
    rolled 8 = 8

    "Somatic reconstruction initialized. Subject is corporeal. Activating Charon uplink."

    >CharonOS Integration Bootup Sequence
    >Version 1.0.08.1
    >Link: PLUTO CMD CENTER, LAZARUS FACILITY ALPHA April 29th 2711.
    >Uploading Basic Skillsoft Package...

    "What the? Power surge again!? Quick shield the body! What do you mean a superposition event? Shut up and makes sense damn it!"

    >Two realities become one, Tesla is dominant aspect of the soul but Roosevelt wasn't going to sit this one out either.

    The first sensation that comes to your mind is cold metal and glaring white light that pierces your eyelids.
    "How are you feeling?"
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:18 No.14759042
    >>14759032
    "Like I want to make a really big electrified stick. I shall dub it the Peacemaker."
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:18 No.14759047
    "Like it's about dayum time."
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:19 No.14759058
         File1304133596.jpg-(151 KB, 500x376, itbegins.jpg)
    151 KB
    >>14759042
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:20 No.14759069
    >>14759032
    "Is that bastard Edison still taking credit for everything I've done?"
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:23 No.14759091
    >>14759042
    Oh, shit. Just had a mental image of Teddy in electrified power armor, and it was good.
    >> Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/29/11(Fri)23:24 No.14759103
    rolled 66 = 66

    >note: my roll is there just for [REDACTED]. You all shall be the ones doing the real rolling. !d100 is what we will be using and the higher the number the better. A result of 100 is the best possible result, 1 is the worst.

    >>14759042

    Opening your eyes you find yourself in room of metal and plastic with a nurse standing before you. Your body feels cool if a bit a sluggish and for reasons you can't yet fathom you're as pale as a corpse... and so is the nurse for that matter too.

    "Wow it seems we can just skip the reintegration test if you're that lucid, Mister..."

    >Remember you are BOTH Tesla and Roosevelt.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:25 No.14759113
    >>14759032
    There's a film I vaguely remember which concerned some of Tesla's work, and by some fuckery, a man was cloned by some Tesla technology. A cat was, too. Or... Something. I wasn't paying much attention and was pretty confused.

    Whatever the case, we must replicate that technology as soon as possible, and seperate Teddy from ourselves, restoring us as two seperate beings...

    Then, together, THEY FIGHT CRIME.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:26 No.14759122
    >>14759103

    Nikoladore Teslavelt.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:27 No.14759125
    >>14759113
    You're thinking of Prestige. Fantastic movie.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:28 No.14759133
    >>14759122
    Yeah, go with this.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:28 No.14759140
    rolled 8 = 8

    "Nurse, would you be a dear, and fetch me a glass of water? I'm a bit parched ya see."
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:28 No.14759141
    >>14759125
    The book was equally awesome.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:29 No.14759143
    Basic inquiries about what's going on and who decided to drag our ass back into this world for no adequately explained reason.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:30 No.14759154
    >>14759113
    >Then, together, THEY FIGHT CRIME.

    I approve of this.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:31 No.14759163
    rolled 51 = 51

    >>14759122


    Nikoladore Teslavelt.

    Now, m'dear, might we have a glass of water and an introduction to this place?
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:33 No.14759177
         File1304134399.jpg-(118 KB, 849x849, tobeornottomonkey.jpg)
    118 KB
    Oh... Dear god.. I swore I would never cry again.. But Oh my god... Nicoladore Teslavelt... I.... I thought I would never find love again.. This is truly... Amazing.
    >> Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/29/11(Fri)23:35 No.14759197
    rolled 15 = 15

    >>14759122

    >>14759163
    The nurse nods, "Mister Teslavelt then." She goes over to the wall and opens a small compartment in it, retrieving a bottle of water. She extends it to you.

    "First, the year is 2711. From what we can tell you died sometime in the 20th century... the system is a little puzzled with you but its nothing to worry about. The doctors said everything is normal as can be."
    "Now this is going to be a little bit of a shock..." she takes your hand and places it over your heart. You note the distinct lack of a heartbeat. "You're still dead."
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:36 No.14759200
    The man needs some water and an informative pamphlet, it must be procured for the name of Science and all things Manly!
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:37 No.14759212
    >>14759197
    "Well of course we're dead girl, life can't just suddenly spring back after seven centuries! You've merely reunited my soul with a body, am I correct?"
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:37 No.14759214
    rolled 84 = 84

    >>14759197
    The Tesla side of us is quite excited. "So we've perfected reanimation? Fantastic! How does it work?"

    Teddy: "Excellent. Now I can reanimate my finest enemies and fight them again."
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:38 No.14759221
    Look at her incredulously- You are alive and well, aren't you old boy? Take the water, twist the top as so that the cap will come off, take a swallow, then get up to show exactly how dead you are! If you are an anomaly to this century's science- then it's nothing new. Make a note to self to procure a big stick, and put a coil atop it for shocking damage.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:39 No.14759225
         File1304134756.jpg-(188 KB, 747x599, HNNNNNNNNG.jpg)
    188 KB
    OP, this is so bloody wonderful, that I don't think it's viable for a quest thread. It is BURSTING with awesome. Every post and suggestion here aside from the Hitler tomfoolery has been made of diamonds. There are too many diamonds. There is too much awesome to handle.

    /tg/, what the hell can we do, with the story of NIKOLADORE TESLAVELT'S quest to regain their seperate bodies, craft wondrous items and acts of statecraft, FIGHT CRIME, and conquer all the petty governments of the world?

    It's... I... It cannot be contained within this universe. It cannot be anything other than what it is. It cannot be comprehended by human minds, it cannot-

    HNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGG
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:40 No.14759234
    >>14759214

    So the consensus would be that we're very interested in learning how it works so we can replicate/use it ourselves.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:41 No.14759245
    >>14759225
    I know! IT.. IT makes Double Rainbows fade to gray, it wrangles the robot unicorn mid stride- dare I Say it my wish has come true! This... This is perfection incarnated to man... We must make him the Emprah
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:42 No.14759249
    rolled 76 = 76

    >>14759214
    Seconding this. Change of expression and voice according to who is speaking. Like that Britfag TV-speaking robot from the Transformers movie, but with Nikola Tesla and a piggybacking Roosevelt instead of pop culture quotes. Fuck yeah.
    >> Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/29/11(Fri)23:44 No.14759262
    rolled 31 = 31

    >Charon OS Skillsoft engaged, downloading science package.

    >>14759214
    She gives you a confused look, possibly because you just spoke in two distinctly different tones as if you were two people. She quickly regains her composure.

    "I don't really know much about the Lazarus process or all this metaphysical biology and quantum mechanics stuff but I can give you an answer about enemies... we have no end of those now... because, well, everyone is dead. All of humanity is."

    The water feels wonderful when you drink it, in fact you're not convinced that is water from how good it feels.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:46 No.14759285
         File1304135165.jpg-(16 KB, 300x400, Nikoladore Teslavelt..jpg)
    16 KB
    rolled 22 = 22

    >>14759262

    "Oh. Well, we must correct that. What is this... Charon OS thing?"

    ((Best I could do on short notice. Someone wanna clean it up in Photoshop?))
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:46 No.14759293
    >>14759262
    ... Then what is she then? Enjoy that goddamn water/whatever it is
    because you haven't had any for the last couple centuries- But do keep inquiring.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:47 No.14759294
    >>14759285
    Post source pictures - I'll come up with something.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:48 No.14759300
    >>14759262

    "All of humanity? But my dear girl, you are a /very/ fine specimen of humanity..."

    *here the Tesla side smacks Teddy upside his metaphysical head for hitting on her*

    "...er, so what exactly do you mean, 'everyone is dead'?"
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:49 No.14759309
         File1304135342.jpg-(16 KB, 225x286, 225px-Tesla3.jpg)
    16 KB
    >>14759294

    First one...
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:49 No.14759316
         File1304135376.jpg-(20 KB, 400x361, teddy-roosevelt1.jpg)
    20 KB
    >>14759294

    Second one. I have a third one, too, if you want it.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:49 No.14759317
    >>14759300
    Correct me if I am wrong- but neither of them were very 'playboy'ish, if anything, Tesla would have been the one to flirt- He had all the bitches.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:49 No.14759318
    rolled 40 = 40

    >>14759262
    Tesla: "Well, thank you, madame, but if you could direct me to someone who DOES kn- What? That's... That's... FASCINATING!"

    Roosevelt: "So there's noone on Earth left to fight? No beasts to hunt on the safari? BALDERDASH! Oh, my, this water... It must be the nectar of the GODS."
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:49 No.14759320
    rolled 1 = 1

    "If I'm still dead my dear woman, does that mean I'll be forced to spend the foreseeable future bound to this machine?" Teddy asks.

    "Should that be the case, I hope it wouldn't be a terrible inconvenience if you could get someone down here to explain the situation more thoroughly." Tesla adds.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:50 No.14759323
    >>14759316
    Sure, might help.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:50 No.14759324
    >>14759318
    This!
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:50 No.14759327
         File1304135452.jpg-(32 KB, 374x250, 1275518591333.jpg)
    32 KB
    >>14759294

    And here's the last one, but I thought it was too different from the Tesla one.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:56 No.14759361
    >>14759320
    This too!
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:56 No.14759362
    >>14759317

    Tesla was celibate because he thought it would interfere with his SCIENCE-ing.

    I don't know about Teddy Roosevelt though.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:57 No.14759368
    >>14759361
    Don't forget to ask about the Charon OS.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:57 No.14759373
    >>14759362
    Not every woman appreciates a man who speaks softly and carries a stick that big.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:58 No.14759374
    >>14759362
    Teddy loved his wife to bits- I don't know much about Tesla other than the coil, his scientific feats of bravado, and that assshole edison, but Theodore as a great guy and was very faithful- though it may have to do also with having trauma earlier in his relationships.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:59 No.14759382
    >>14759374

    My bad then. I'm not the best with early 20th century history.
    >> Anonymous 04/29/11(Fri)23:59 No.14759388
    rolled 45 = 45

    >>14759362
    >>14759317
    Teddy was faithfully married a few times. There was one thing that would bring him to despair; being called Teddy. Teddy, of course, was the nickname used by his late wife. Oh, and the death of his closest son in the Great War. It's believed these events lead to his death, passing peacefully in his sleep. Because, if he'd been awake, Death would've had a fight on his hands.

    So yeah, Teddy might be more of a flirt compared to Tesla... But that's not saying much. Or anything.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:00 No.14759391
    >>14759374
    Continue, please. We should know our own backstory.

    Plus, you know, it's motherfucking Roosevelt.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:03 No.14759422
    BTW, guys, I am now designing a team of historic superheroes. So far, Nikola Tesla, Teddy Roosevelt, George Washington (No more presidents now), and Marcus Aurelius. Throw me names.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:04 No.14759425
    >>14759320

    In the interests of moving this along, let's go with this response.
    >> Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/30/11(Sat)00:05 No.14759437
    rolled 47 = 47

    >>14759285
    >Explanation: the Charon OS is a distributed ghost-computer network to provide support functionality to all members of the Revenantcy.

    >>14759318 & >>14759293
    "The best way to explain it is that our bodies are living through a different process now. We don't need to eat, drink, or breathe, so if you'e familiar with literature on the undead you could say that's what we are."

    "There are plenty of rev- people left to fight but we've all been reanimated. It was because of aliens... they invaded. First they wiped out our colonies in the inner system. I died in the first wave... I was lucky I guess because they say that those who were captured are now lobotimized slaves. Anyway where was I, they pressed inward and when we wouldn't surrender the bombed Earth thinking it would wipe out our morale."

    "Didn't work, those of who were left just became more resolved to fight and they slogged it out till we were left with only bases on Pluto and in the Kuiper belt. We;ve since pushed the aliens back but we could only do that because death isnt the end any more."
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:06 No.14759442
    >>14759422

    Audie Murphy
    Simo Hayha
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:07 No.14759453
    >>14759437
    Tesla: "You have a base on PLUTO?"

    Teddy: "Aliens. Fine hunting, I presume?"
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:08 No.14759461
    >>14759442
    Oh god, I remember these guys. How could I have forgotten them?
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:10 No.14759481
    >>14759362
    First- he was an explorer at heart. Many of his sorrowful days before, and out of office he spent exploring, ranging from the American west, to the jungles of Africa- He was a great hunter too. He was also a lawyer- and one who would hunt down the dirty cop. He specialized himself to weed out the weak links in his company of lawyers whilst he was still in it, and prided in picking out bad apples (and crushing them in his fist while letting off a bellowing laugh of pure masculinity- but I digress) . He also did do SOME underhanded tactics if he thought they were for the greater good- he literally built the panama canal without permission of the US Senate, and with minimal permission from Panama it's self. He was also a huge moralfag sometimes- he demanded that all money have "In God We Trust" Taken off of it-b ecause it was usually used to buy earthly posessions- it was only restored when congress whined about it- AFTER he left office. He also 1) Had a Photographic Memory 2) could multitask in the extreme (Read books and wrote documents at the same time- and could tell you the meaning of each) 3) had limited depth perception (his left eye was blind) , and was, in order; Officer in the National Guard, New York police commissioner, Governor of New York, Vice President, Assistant Secretary of the Navy.

    Shoot me now- but I am a huge fucking fanboy.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:10 No.14759484
    >>14759422
    Gilgamesh the heroes heroes hero.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:11 No.14759495
    rolled 61 = 61

    >>14759437
    Tesla: "Aliens? Sentient life from beyond? Fascinating, but... That's just horrible how it ended. If only the world had seen the merits of the Peace Ray, this could've been avoided!"

    Roosevelt, furious: "Monsters from outer space, besting man?! BALDERDASH! Something's got to be done posthaste! If those cretins think they can pull a fast one, they've got another thing coming! Book a flight to Mars, I'm going on safari!"

    >>14759422
    Rommel. The only German from the Nazi era to have a museum dedicated to his celebration. A man of honor, military merit and a magnificent bastard, as well as involved in the plot to assassinate Hitler, and leader of the Afrika Corps, the only German army convicted of no war crimes. He fought in World War I, too, and was just as much a magnificent bastard then.
    >> Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/30/11(Sat)00:12 No.14759503
         File1304136769.jpg-(235 KB, 1024x768, plutocharond.jpg)
    235 KB
    rolled 48 = 48

    >>14759453

    "We're on Pluto right now." She gestures to the wall. It slides down to reveal the icy dwarf planet and its moon hanging in the sky.

    She chuckles, "Yes you could say that. That's why were're bringing everyone back so we can fight. We're going to retake Earth and the bring the fight to their worlds."
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:13 No.14759504
    >>14759484
    Sticking to actual people. Otherwise Beowulf and Gilgamesh would be on there in a second.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:14 No.14759520
    >>14759503

    Jump to the window and gaze out at the vast quantities of possible SCIENCE and EXPLORATION.

    "We- I'm with you."
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:14 No.14759525
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>14759503
    Damnit, too late. >>14759495
    here, and I repeat myself. Append if you wish.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:15 No.14759527
    >>14759520
    Also, DICE ROLL
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:15 No.14759528
    >>14759481
    Oh, I forgot to mention- he was also involved in the sports of boxing, hunting, jujitsu, riding, shooting, tennis, and wrestling.

    So yes- Teddy is going to be taking over for battles, UNDEAD SUPER TANK FUCK YEAR.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:15 No.14759534
    rolled 16 = 16

    >>14759527
    DICE ROLL AGAIN
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:19 No.14759581
    >>14759504
    Gilgamesh is a real person
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gilgamesh
    5th king of Uruk around 2500 BC
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:22 No.14759604
    >>14759581
    So he is. Huh. Still, though, his story isn't able to be backed up by anything reliable.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:24 No.14759635
    >>14759604
    the sources for his story are exactly as reliable as those for king Richard the lionheart Abraham Lincoln or any other historical figure where every contemporary from their time has died.

    There's just less of it.
    >> Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/30/11(Sat)00:26 No.14759652
         File1304137607.jpg-(115 KB, 1919x1079, ship1286493656167.jpg)
    115 KB
    rolled 6 = 6

    >>14759495
    A large ship streaks across the horizon just as the door to the room slides open. A man in a mottled gray and red uniform walks in and looks to the nurse who just nods to him.

    "Mister... Teslavelt, sir" he offers a curt salute, "As I am sure you have been told humanity is dire straights and we would appreciate to have the cooperation of... such great men as yourselves." He sounds a bit unsure how to address you given your two people in one. "We would be honored if you could consider service in the military, however if need be we can easily obtain you a position amongst R&D."
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:26 No.14759654
    >>14759635
    You can't honestly believe that the Epic of Gilgamesh is equally historically reliable to the average biography of Teddy Roosevelt.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:28 No.14759666
    >>14759652
    TEDDY: "MILITARY"
    TESLA: "R&D"
    TEDDY: "MILITARY"
    TESLA: "R&D"
    TEDDY: "MILITARY"
    TESLA: "R&D"
    TEDDY: "MILITARY"
    TESLA: "R&D"
    TEDDY: "MILITARY"
    TESLA: "R&D"
    TEDDY: "MILITARY"
    TESLA: "R&D"

    This could go on for a while.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:28 No.14759679
    >>14759652
    Both voices speak in unison.
    "Give me a single good reason I can't do both."
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:29 No.14759684
    >>14759652
    Theodor rough rides again!
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:31 No.14759702
    >>14759654
    According to source citation requirements, it is. both are written pieces from contemporaries telling what happened.

    Tesla R&d is fine officer

    Roosevelt so long as i get to shoot something, preferably large and dangerous somethings.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:31 No.14759706
    >>14759679
    Followed with, "In fact, why don't we- I just head up the whole organization?"
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:32 No.14759723
    >>14759679
    This! Ohmygod this is beautiful
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:33 No.14759726
    >>14759706
    >>14759679
    YES
    YES
    A THOUSAND TIMES YES!
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:33 No.14759728
    >>14759706
    Seconded.

    Nikoladore Teslavelt has been awake for mere minutes, and he can already step forward to take leadership of his flock.
    >> Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/30/11(Sat)00:34 No.14759734
    rolled 49 = 49

    >>14759666
    >>14759679
    He scratches his brow. "Well it would take you months even with Charon's skillsofts to catch up with modern science. It's been a busy 700 years since the 1900's."

    He shifts his weight as the nurse steps out of the room. "I could have it arranged so you're placed on a hijacking team. You'd be able to get your hands on some alien ships."
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:34 No.14759742
    >>14759635
    This.
    Except for the reams of anecdotal corroboration for the guy who 800yrs ago was King of England, Duke of Normandy, Duke of Aquitaine, Duke of Gascony, Lord of Ireland, Lord of Cyprus, Count of Anjou, Count of Maine, Count of Nantes, and Overlord of Brittany, or the the portrait and photo evidence of the guy who 150yrs ago was President og the US, and the fact that clay-based 5000yr-old cuneiform databases are notoriously buggy.
    Other than that, it's like a mirror ...
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:36 No.14759760
    rolled 85 = 85

    >>14759734
    Tesla: "Work with extraterrestrial technology? That's an opportunity no man can pass up! I'll do it!"

    Roosevelt: "Punching extraterrestrials in the face, in space? BOLLY! I can't pass up an adventure like that! I'll do it!"
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:36 No.14759766
    >>14759742
    all of those things you listed are exactly the same type of evidence, contemporary documents.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:37 No.14759772
    rolled 1 = 1

    >>14759734

    Nikola: "But..."

    TEDDY: "ALRIGHT. WHERE ARE THE STICKS."
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:38 No.14759780
         File1304138292.jpg-(18 KB, 240x300, BULLY.jpg)
    18 KB
    >>14759734
    Teddy: HOW BULLY! WE'D LOVE TO START IMMEDIATELY. DOES ANYONE HAVE A SWORD?

    Tesla: I... I suppose I can read on the ship. Do you have a small library of key advances?
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:38 No.14759785
    rolled 2 + 2 = 4

    >>14759734

    Chuckles to himself

    "I think you underestimate our skills. Just give the highlights, we can figure out the rest when we get to the practical applications."
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:40 No.14759819
    >>14759780
    Someone make an in character way to request a bolter gun and golden power armor- Quick!
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:41 No.14759829
    >>14759819
    Teddy: HAVE YOU ANY SUITABLE ARMOR FOR COMBATING THE ALIEN MENACE? AND PERHAPS SOME SORT OF BIG STICK...
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:43 No.14759851
    >>14759829
    I love you Anon- but you forgot the bolter
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:46 No.14759877
    >>14759851
    Firearms are for hunting noble beasts that i shall mount above my fireplace, These alien scum deserve no such noble end.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:47 No.14759888
    >>14759877
    ... You have a point.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:48 No.14759896
    rolled 4 + 2 = 6

    >>14759877

    To which Tesla would probably point out the foolhardiness of charging into battle against a technologically-advanced foe like that.

    I thought it said that Tesla's personality was mostly in control?
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:49 No.14759910
    >>14759896
    But dude, teddy's so much _cooler_
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:51 No.14759931
    >>14759910

    The two personalities would probably start to fuse after a bit, and I would imagine Teddy's would be more assertive, so yeah, I can see that it would come to the forefront more.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:52 No.14759943
    >>14759896
    Tesla would hate the inefficiency, no issues with destroying the bodies entirely with energy discharges.

    >>14759734
    That sounds fine for now, but what of these aliens, what do they look like, their strengths and weaknesses, their culture?

    Especially their culture concerning their dead... there shall be a lot of them and we should ensure they are never laid to rest gods heaven shall hold no peace for those who destroyed his blessed children.
    >> Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/30/11(Sat)00:52 No.14759952
    rolled 9 = 9

    >Charon OS Science Package (3.1 TB) download complete.
    >Teslavelt now has access to introductory level courses in all modern scientific disciplines.

    >>14759760
    The man lets out a sigh, as if he had been dreading you saying no. "Ok now normally they'd want to send you through bootcamp and all that but we're kind of pressed on time. We need every man we can get since the Collective is finally getting off its ass and attempting a counter attack so we pretty much need you in the field ASAP."

    He leads you into a sterile looking hallway and you pass several other rooms like the one had been in. You see other 'revenants', which seems to be the common name for the undead. Most seem to have the deathly pale complexion but that's to expected. What's surpising is when you see a few that are simply skeletons connected together by ethereal wisps and others what you'd call a ghost.

    "Now basic man to man combat hasnt changed much, just bigger and better guns which are now so easy to use we've had guys from the American Civilwar using them with a passing level of proficiency."
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:54 No.14759969
         File1304139253.jpg-(36 KB, 381x361, Nicoladore Teslavelt.jpg)
    36 KB
    Meet your new spiritual liege, /tg/.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:55 No.14759989
    rolled 63 = 63

    >>14759952
    TEDDY: "BORING. Give me something with a challenge and a good kick."

    TESLA: "BORING. Give me something so far advanced that it takes me the whole shuttle ride to learn how to reload it. Then I'll reverse-engineer it."
    >> Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/30/11(Sat)00:56 No.14759994
    rolled 29 = 29

    >>14759952
    "Now," he starts as he leads you to an elevator. "We're sorta screwed in ship to ship terms. We only lasted this long because thanks to the Cold War, we had a surplus of nukes we never got rid of so we could afford to throw them around with a care in the world. But we're catching up on that end now that we can exploit their biggest weakness, boarding actions. The Collective's ships aren't prepared to deal with them. Once we're inside it's a piece of cake."
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:56 No.14759995
    >>14759969
    >>14759969

    ...I think the hair is throwing it off. It just looks silly to me.

    Other than that, fantastic shopping.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:56 No.14760005
    rolled 33 = 33

    >>14759969
    Could you put the head on the Tesla suit? It's a bit more badass.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:56 No.14760008
    >>14759969
    ... Could you please put some glasses on him- he looks kinda disturbing. It makes me want to make the image "Noclodor Toslovelt"
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:57 No.14760012
    /tg/ =Teslavelt God
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:57 No.14760014
    rolled 13 = 13

    >>14759994
    TEDDY: "FANTASTIC."

    Also, >>14759989
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:58 No.14760019
    >>14759994

    Teddy: "Boarding? Very good, I've been itching to keep my judo in practice..."

    Tesla is probably taking in the ship as they walk, analyzing the troops and the technology around them.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:58 No.14760026
    Anyone planning on archiving this?
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:58 No.14760027
    Franklin Delano Roosevelt. This time, without the wheelchair and twice as much as win.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)00:59 No.14760032
         File1304139541.jpg-(37 KB, 500x500, woll-smoth--large-msg-12007008(...).jpg)
    37 KB
    >>14759969
    The eyes look a bit small. Unless you're going for Nocolodoro Toslovolt.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)01:00 No.14760051
    >>14759995
    That hair was a BITCH. Wanted to replace it with someone else's hair with a similar style, but couldn't find anything.
    >>14760008
    Thought the glasses might make him look too Teddy...
    >>14760032
    Can't shoop now - laughing too hard. Maybe in the morning.
    >> Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/30/11(Sat)01:03 No.14760077
    rolled 45 = 45

    >>14759989
    >>14760014
    "The problem is getting inside, they have shields and gun batteries and the trick that got us most of our fleet won't work again."

    >Elucidation: The "Pluto Counterattack", at September 13th 2701 the Collective subjugation entered the debris field left from the previous battles. All live humans had be converted to revenants allowing them to take positions in the field without the Collective's knowing. When the Collective's ships passed through the field the revanants attacked, boarding enemy ships which resulted in a decisive victory and the capture of 21 star ships with negligible damage.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)01:05 No.14760105
    Archived for SCIENCE! And MANLY EXPLOITS OF ADVENTURE!

    http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/14758819/

    Sorry if the name isn't what you wanted, we never really got a name for this quest so I made something up.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)01:13 No.14760157
    rolled 25 = 25

    >>14760077
    Tesla: "Listen, these boarding actions simply aren't needed! Give me access to the proper materials, a team of scientists and some time, and I can make a weapon that will end this conflict forever!"

    Theodore: "Oh, please. It's a damn fine wepaon, Tesla, but it isn't the man's way to end this conflict! Charge straight ahead, ram them, and let the great hunt in the metal alien jungle begin!"

    Tesla: "Theodore, you've got no vision! You're a damned fine man, but that's just not practical!"

    Theodore: "Neither is your teleforce techno-whatsit!"

    Tesla: "Jingo!"

    Theodore: "Egghead!"

    Tesla: "Poacher!"

    Theodore: "SPINELESS!"

    Both: "IF I HAD MY BODY..."

    Theodore: "
    >> Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/30/11(Sat)01:13 No.14760163
    rolled 50 = 50

    >Now sychronizing Charon OS with Pluto Control Alpha. Activating HUD.
    >The name of the man you're talking to enters your mind when you look at him, Lt. Ewan Webb.

    >>14760077
    The elevator comes to a halt and opens, the atmosphere venting into a hard vacuum showing an expansive hanger with a people, corporeal and incorporeal going about their duties. There are several dozen ships in the process of being equipped.

    Despite the vacuum you still hear Ewan's voice as he continues on. "You'll be on the HRS Graverobber." The ship closest to you lights up with a blue glow. "It's small and fast and has had quite a good bit of luck in getting right up under their noses. All the gear you'll need is onboard. Once again sorry for throwing you into this without any preparation but it's sickeningly common around here."
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)01:14 No.14760169
    >>14760157
    >>14760157

    Ha ha, yes, I would love to see how everyone else reacts to us arguing with ourselves.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)01:15 No.14760180
    rolled 63 = 63

    >>14760157
    Forget that last, incomplete Theodore line. Derped it up. Ends on the 'both' note.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)01:16 No.14760193
    >>14760163
    Ask where the nearest enemy ship is, then climb the Graverobber (still arguing) and loop around to the other side of it before boarding.

    No need to tell the enemy exactly where we came from quite yet.
    >> Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/30/11(Sat)01:27 No.14760270
    rolled 92 = 92

    >Notice: The Human Revenantcy, having reviewed you past has deemed fit to promote you to Second Lieutenant based upon your past experience.

    >>14760157
    Ewan does his best to decidely not react to the exchange but you can't help but attract some attention though no one gives it too much regard. Everyone's too busy with their duties to say much or too jaded to care.

    The ship before is about 60 meters long with a sleek steel gray hull, a stylized grinning skull within a hexagon with two swords behind it painted on the side. HRS Graverobber written under it in bold red.

    You stride ever confidently up the ramp and into the its cabin to find 10 other men in full body armor looking at you strangely. You now note that you're basicly walking around in pajamas. "The hell?" one of the states, a private Crowell to be specific.

    Ewan comes up from behind, "This is uh,
    Nikoladore Teslavelt. He's fresh from the tubes and probably the clearest headed dead man i've seen this early."
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)01:35 No.14760323
    rolled 81 = 81

    >>14760270
    Tesla: "Pardon me, but, we're distinct, you know. That was a bit of confusion in the initial reanimation. I'm Nikola Tesla..."

    Theodore: "... And I'm Theodore Roosevelt. Bloody eggheads screwed the pooch on this one-"

    Tesla: "-as there's been rather an accident, in that we inhabit one body. So we are, technically, TWO-"

    Theodore: "-of the most clear-headed dead men you've seen today."

    Tesla: "Would you mind? Please, st-"

    Theodore: "-op finishing all my sentences!"

    Both: "GODDAMNIT."
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)01:38 No.14760349
    Holy shit, first the God-Emperor combined with a Tarrasque, now Nikola Tesla combined with Theodore Roosevelt...

    /tg/'s like some sort of brilliant genetics scientist tonight.
    >> Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/30/11(Sat)01:48 No.14760432
    rolled 96 = 96

    >Adding new contacts(corporeal): Pvt. Fukne, Pvt. Crowell, Pvt. Allan, Pvt. Croquetaigne, Pvt. Blom, Pvt. Chimezie, Cpl. Hicks, Cpl. Franco, Sgt. Elias, Sgt. Apone
    >Adding new contacts (incorporeal): Captain Houdini, Sgm. Karlsen.

    >>14760323
    Ewan tries not to look at you strangely but the rest of the crew does.

    "Wait wait wait," a voice starts from somewhere before an ephemeral face forms on the ship's wall. "They managed to squeeze the ROOSEVELT and the TESLA into the same body? And he's on MY ship?"
    >> Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/30/11(Sat)02:00 No.14760567
    rolled 86 = 86

    hmm this is running out of steam and I think I must say the same for myself

    I'll watch this for a little longer to see if anything comes from this bump but otherwise i'll pick up with BOARDING ACTION sometime later.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)02:02 No.14760585
    >>14760567
    Poster of many of the Tesla-Theodore-Both style posts 'ere, I do believe you're right. Gave it ten minutes for someone else to take the spotlight with some writing, nothing. I suggest the thread be allowed to rest and picked up at some point in the near future.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)02:02 No.14760595
    >>14760432
    Look towards the voice. "No, no squeezing in here, more of an outright shoving match"
    >> Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/30/11(Sat)02:04 No.14760616
    rolled 12 = 12

    >>14760585
    Righty then, I do hope this was enjoyable (and I'm glad you all decided to lean toward something that would lead to a more 'pulp' atmosphere than everyone-is-dead grimdark)
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)02:22 No.14760811
    >>14760616
    This... this can't be ending so soon! There is more awesome in one place than the time.. than the time... GODDAMN, THERES TOO MUCH AWESOME
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)03:17 No.14761453
    Bumping in hopes o more.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)13:56 No.14765558
    Bumping as I want to see more of this.


    If this continues, I REALLY want to see Robert E. Howard and Tolkien get into a fight. And Lovecraft should show up too.
    >> bump 04/30/11(Sat)14:08 No.14765639
    erwin rommel, he died fighting nazis (plot of assassinating hitler) and he may well be what we need to fight those goddamn eldar
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)14:23 No.14765749
         File1304187791.jpg-(164 KB, 480x1620, neckbeards.jpg)
    164 KB
    MOOOOOOOOOORE
    MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE
    >> Anonymous 04/30/11(Sat)15:34 No.14766396
    mOAR
    >> Charon !NKyenm6iiI 04/30/11(Sat)15:41 No.14766442
    I'll start up a new thread later tonight



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