>Wait patiently for /tg/
>idly Google Zerg Quest
>I'm the first result! That's...either neat or sad. Or both.
>What's this? A thread about Zerg Quest on tgchan?
>tgchan's a thing?
>FUCK TEXT QUESTS
>Thread devolves into discussions about some dude's hats

Well, now I'm just confused.

(Well, then. Action begins)

Continuing to lay about, we notice something twinkling in the sun over Lutrious. It takes us a moment to focus enough to realize it is a Terran escape pod drifting through the system toward our planet...

>>16534036
The pod enters the upper atmosphere, and its onboard systems automatically set it on a survivable trajectory. It is surrounded by flames as its kinetic energy is absorbed into the planet's. It looks like it will land next to a spawning pool full of lounging zerglings.

>>16534136
Probe it!

>>16534240
Hard to tell while it's screaming toward the surface, but it appears to have two or three life forms aboard. It's only designed for one, but we're pretty sure there are reasonable explanations for a cramped escape pod.

>>16533798
Yeah, tgchan loves quests, but it's drawfags hate text quests. Something to do with them putting time into drawing shit and people who don't can get just as much or more attention. A lot of buttmad too.


And probe the pid. Probe it with 'ling claws.

>>16534257
Which is why we probe it once it lands, obviously. And by probe I man infest the UED survivors in the pod. Also I'm going to keep my idea of how to bring dad back without the crazy toss crystal to myself untill more people show up.

>>16533798
>d about Zerg Quest on tgchan?
>>tgchan's a thing?

It's tgchan. The place where most of /tg/'s furry population went.

>>16534282
>>16534286
It is a spectacular crash-landing. There are some things that just don't get old, and a fireball from space exploding on the surface of a world without killing you is one of them.

Our zerglings gather around the pod once it's cooled down enough. There's movement inside, and finally the pod's seals release and the hatch springs open. Inside are two Terrans with looks of determination on their faces, and one with several wriggling parasites crawling on her face.

Without hesitation, we launch our zerglings forward in a flurry of chitin and claws. The Terrans kill four of them before they die, and we begin destroying the bodies of the fallen before they can come back.

The Dyles Entity sent this pod. But why would it only send three Terrans?

>>16534295
And...furries...love hats?

The ending of that thread was the confusing part.

>>16534295
Yeah, I thought it might be decent if a bit sensitive (as most of the sensitive questfags fled there while /tg/ was going through some quest hate, including weaver) but nope.

Some bits are decent, but 90% is terrible and they are even more obsessed with sex than /tg/. There was literally a rapequest. Two actually, but the second was a (somewhat funny) joke. The first was literally about following a female furry straight out of happy-tree-friends while watching her get raped/nearly raped.

Yep. And yes, I read it, doesnt make it any less creepy. Horrified curiosity has terrible consequences.

>>16534347

NUKE THE SITE. NOW.

STERILISE.

>>16534363
Okay... getting back on topic, so we now have to root out Dyles... but I don't want to do a full scale invasion of UED space (insert poutty little girl). Increase nukeworld's production, increase carrier production, increase production of non-zerg assets, make sealed power armour suits for most everything else. We need to make our forces relatively immune to the parasites and be able to cleanse planets en mass.

>>16534363
To be fair, there have been parts of this quest that...well...

>>16534391
Labbrate finds that a little extreme. Firebats should be able to sterilize the site, with the added benefit that we have firebats at Lutrious, whereas a nuclear device would either need to be assembled or brought on the weeks-long journey from Zerg World.

We concur, and the sterilization begins.

(Somebody roll 1d100)

>>16534391

Seconding. Sterilize the area. Shuffle the thoroughly irradiated escape pod to a safe, quarantined area that can also be readily sterilized. Have the Zerg Science Corp. examine the pod for anything out of the ordinary.

Have our sciencebrates or Cyberbrate plot out how the pod entered the atmosphere and try to predict where it could have came from in space.

>>16534347
Can we trace back the escape pod's origin by analyzing it's trajectory from when we first detected it?
Also, our listening post needs to be expanded, and a system-wide sensor net put in place to prevent any more such surprises.

And also make sure to sterilize that area where the escape pod landed. It's probably crawling with neural parasites.

rolled 9 = 9

>>16534461
Burn it!

rolled 15 = 15

>>16534461

rolled 10 = 10

>>16534479
>>16534483
Off to a good start we are.

rolled 70 = 70

>>16534461

Rollin' out.

>>16534479
>>16534483
(Bastards)

As we burn away the flesh of the Terrans and the zerglings and the zerglings that killed those zerglings (just to be sure), we detect 24 ships coming out of warp into the system. They are all making a beeline for the planet.

>>16534555
You said bastards... was low good? Regardless scramble our forces to fight off the UED or Dyles fleet. Be sure to play music and have meaningless communications traffic in case it's the UED.

>>16534555
Well that's just silly.

What do we have in the vicinity to deal with that?

>>16534605
Meaningless in that it's of no tactical or strategic importance, not gibberish. Infested terrans talking about their families back home or something, discussions of the latest ZergTV documentary.

>>16534555
Launch all aerospace assets. Prepare ground forces in any defensible bunkers. Hail the incoming ships, demand to know their allegiance.
And if we have any nukes there, prepare them.

>>16534555
>>16534555

Scramble what available defenses we have on Lutrious. Hail the ships, and try to get some profiles on what types of ship they have in their fleet.

Have a small force of Zerg on Lutrious hang back from defending and make themselves inconspicuous (i.e. forming small hive clusters in underground cave networks or just hiding). If this maybe-Dyles wants to occupy Lutrious, we could potentially strike back at his forces later on. If not, we can recoup our losses there when maybe-Dyles moves on.

>>16534634
Yeah... hiding doen't really work on Dyles. Overwhelming numbers, nuclear weapons, and Toss planet glassers are what we need to fight Dyles, or really anyone now that I think of it.

>>16534605
(I was cleverly having you roll 2d100 to see how many ships arrived)

Our forces over Lutrious are small, but the scourge and mutalisks are still quite capable of dealing with such a direct attack. Once we are mobilized, it is only moments before only the largest ship, a cargo carrier, remains. It's slow, but durable. A message comes from the ship before our attacks can do much damage. It's Dyles, his face barely recognizable beneath the nest of tadpole-like parasites growing from mossy protrusions out of his skull:

"You are a fool to interfere, Cerebrate. The UED will fall, and the Koprulu Sector will be but an afterthought for our luscious Hunger. You are the cherry atop our dessert, Dirtworm. In time, even your little Swarm will be part of our Feast, and you will watch, powerless. We suggest that you scurry and hide like the walker filth you are. We will return."

The signal cuts off just before we blow the ship into many pieces.

>>16534714
I repeat my suggestion of more nukes, more carriers, and more power armour. And maybe bringing dad back by using our, apparently still existing, piles of psi emitters.

>>16534741
Built on-site, or sent via the warp engine postal service?

>psi emitters
Ha! I knew you'd figure it out! It took me weeks to think of, too!

>>16534714
I still think we need Cyberbrate to finish its analysis of the VoidGate-designed Terminator neural net processors for backdoor, and get one of the terminator factories back up and running.
It would be very helpful to have a force that cannot be infected by the Dyles neural parasite.

>>16534787
We ship by the Zerg Postal Service, unless the worldship has information on building a warp network.

So it's really just as simple as fussing a bunch of overlord together around a pile of emitters tuned to dad... I mean it does make sense based on how I understand resurrection and the swarm as a whole functions.

>>16534796
It would also help to have fluff carriers, fluff carriers everywhere.

>>16534787

If Dyles isn't bullshitting us, then he's got a sizeable force ready, probably "commandeered" from the UED. We haven't been able to get a good feel for what exactly the Dyles entity IS (excluding our meta-knowledge from Spooky Zergquest, which only amounts to us knowing his MO).

But there might be people who did know what the Dyles entity was before it got a hold of Dyles himself.

Have the Zerg Science Corp. delve into the Xel'naga worldship. Have them search for records on any type of neural parasite or such.

Also, begin developing a type of Zerg spore that can be launched from queens and defilers (and maybe other appropriate Zerg units... maybe even the mantalisk or other fast flyers) that induces rapid growth of the Psionic-blank gland that we discovered shortly after our Xel'naga Worldship hijacking. While it might not be as drastic as a nuke or acid spray, it may be useful in disabling large amounts of Dyles' forces in a pinch.

>>16534847
(I thought we were talking about using the crystal.)

Just how large a force should we send?

Okay, Dyles is going to be an issue with lightning raids parasitising the shit out of everything. We need a warp network, or faster warp travel.
In the meantime, maybe spread our forces out evenly so that, wherever Dyles shows up, we have forces both already there and reinforcements relatively close by.

Oh yeah. We should probably tell Kerrigan that Dyles is up and about now.

>>16534847
>>16534917

I don't think that resurrecting the Overmind will really do anything. It will piss off the Protoss something fierce for one, making us fight two potentially very large enemy forces at once. Secondly, unless the Overmind can automagically resurrect every Zerg that died in the Battle for Aiur and every Cerebrate that didn't die of Dark Templar void-blade trauma, all he's going to do is re-assert control over us and Kerrigan and tell us to do shit. And maybe wonder why the hell we would resurrect him before we had the whole Korpulu sector waiting for him on a silver platter.

>>16534917
Wait. Are you saying you we thinking out using an emitter as the basis for working the crystal? I was thinking that the psionic signature IS the being. If that weren't the case then how could cerbrates tell each other apart, and why would the overmind still have to be in contact with a cerebrate to resurrect them? Maybe I just don't the answers to the fluff holes.

As for Dyles, we send a small(ish) force. It takes weeks to get there afterall, but a force that is large enough to glass a planet and defend itself from a pure terran force ten time its size.

>>16534878
>that induces rapid growth of the Psionic-blank gland

That would require extensive mutation, on the order of causing a Terran to mutate into a zergling. It might be possible, but it might be a waste of time. Should we devote our cerebrates to it?

>Delve into the Worldship's files

There are files in folders for operations, design, ship's logs, and bio-diversity. The computers are older than the Overmind, and extremely delicate, considering their rough condition. We could try to do a search, but Cyberbrate warns that there's a chance that even a successful one would corrupt a lot of data. Should we risk it?

>>16534917
A battlegroup consisting of 1 Protoss Carrier, 1 Battlecruiser, 2 squadrons of Wraiths, a few wings of mutalisks and mantalisks, and a small force of drones and SCV's, enough to build a few more hatcheries and structures, and begin construction of an orbital shipyard.

>>16534955
I'm not saying we resurrect him now. Just figuring out what CA meant when he said "it's in the first 15 threads." Though on could argue that the Overmind would want to be around for when the first born are conquered.

>>16534969
>fluff holes

(Blizzard's, or mine? Either way, I'm not saying your idea won't work; just that using the emitters on the crystal was the solution I thought of)

>>16534973
>mutations
No that's stupid and won't work. We need glands that make Dyles-be-Gone viruses/bacteria/chemicals more than that. And we need Terran resources to come up with the DbG first.
>worldship computers
No no no. We need to, very carefully, back up as much of the data as possible. THEN we can fuck around with it.

>>16534973
>It might be possible, but it might be a waste of time. Should we devote our cerebrates to it?
No, I think it's a waste of time, and depends on far too many assumptions of how the neural parasites operate.
If we capture more parasites and are able to prove that the null-psi gland actually works on their hosts, then we can devote resources to it.

>Worldship files
Risk going through designs for how to create a warp network, or an improved warp drive design.

>>16535013

Seconding the warp research.

Also, warn Kerrigan that Dyles may be on the prowl again.

>>16535012
Without a way to directly interact with the data (the Old Ones obviously used a far different computer system than the Terrans or Protoss of today), we can merely access files, which carries with it a risk of corruption or accidental deletion, due to extreme age and damage.

Attempting a search would essentially involve accessing every file. If successful, it would definitely bring us to the relevant information, but might destroy all or part of the rest. If unsuccessful, it could possibly destroy all or part of the entire database.

(This'll all be based on rolls, btw. I'm not just going to say, "LOL! You get nothing and it's all fried! Fuck you!")

(I mean, not right now, anyway)

>>16535074
>>16535013
>2 for searching for warp schematics

>>16535004
Blizzard's holes, unless they explained just how resurrection works and I missed it. When trying to figure this out I was operating under the, apparently, mistaken assumption that it didn't involve the crystal at all.

Also, let's not screw with the psionic null glands, there's no proof they'd break the Dyles parasite's control. And just have cyberbrate go sequential through looking for key words. And I support the forward base idea.

>>16534973

More possible corruption? It seems that every time we so much as think of the damn thing something corrupts on that stupid computer.

Can we possibly research a way to look at the files without severe corruption?

>>16535096
>>16535116
Unless we have no other real options, we should leave it until we find a way to use it safely. There is a very large amount of very useful stuff in there and it would be a real shame to find something that kills Dyles, but miss the part where it says 'also kills all Zerg everywhere forever'.

Can we download the files to a less damaged system, we'd have to build more storage but still...

>>16535116
>It seems that every time we so much as think of the damn thing something corrupts on that stupid computer.

(I've had computers like this that were less than a decade old. This computer is something like 5 million years old. Perspective, man. You're accessing data from before hominids. From the fucking Pliocene era at the earliest)

>>16535161
(Your point is good, but I'm going to nitpick that the last log entry we could find was the discovery of the Protoss, so there won't be anything in here at all about the Zerg)

>>16535215
(Our only interface is through a series of screens, which we only understand because Artisanlord basically intuited their entire language from nothing)

>>16535232
Well of course it won't specifically say those words exactly. And I was exaggerating anyway.
My point is, we have ways of combating Dyles now. Sure, they aren't as effective as we'd like, but they work. Mostly. This computer represents an enormous wealth of knowledge, and fucking with it now would be a waste.

So, unless I'm mistaken, we haven't had any more votes since >>16535096 . Not searching? Sending shit to Lutrious? Defiler parade through Time Square?

>>16535396
I didn't know we had a Tine Square, but I'm sure Artisanlord can fix that for a defiler parade. And I'm still for ZergExing forces to Lut, and searching for warp technology/dyles in the archive the old fashined way.

A carrier, battlecruiser, and assorted smaller ships begins the long journey to UED space.

Warbrate gently asks us what we intend to do about the UED itself. It believes that we have clear enough evidence that Dyles and the UED are at war to consider the option of diplomacy with the Terrans. Obviously, it says, we will not be able to broker as nice a deal as we have with the Morians, but both the Morians and the Protoss are proof that it can be done.

>>16535545
Internbrate counters that we know next to nothing about the UED, its size, or its disposition. We can't even say what the long cultural divergence from the Koprulu Terrans may have done to their culture. We would be negotiating blind.

>>16535545
>>16535563

We have those UED scientists that we infested. Why don't we take a trip down their memory lane and pull up their experiences with the UED? It might give us a good starting point on how to deal with the UED should we need to negotiate with them.

>>16535545
At the moment focusing on containing Dyles and gathering intelligence about the UED as a whole is our goal. Once we know how things are going we'll be able to make a decision.

>>16535545
>>16535563
Why don't we pull all the cultural and social information we can get from the UED scientists?
Also, a general idea of how big the UED is, and then send Dropservers to the edges of UED space, in order to listen in on UED comm traffic. Also, our Lutrious listening post was originally a UED colony; does it have a comm array it can use to access UED information channels?

>>16535600
We...had them. They were very dead and gone after helping to create enough biomass to recall the worldship fragment. We aren't even sure whether we can retain memories lost that way.

(You can roll a d6 to find out, since I don't really have an opinion on how weird extradimensional physics ought to affect weird brain magic. That's...that's a bit more in-depth than I'm willing to get)

>>16535607
Warbrate asks if we have a plan. We only know of a handful of worlds in that area, at all.

rolled 5 = 5

>>16535653
Alright, let's see if we still have those memories.

Also, are you ignoring all of my calls for more Terminators?

>>16535653
Well, I think we should contact the UED, tell them about Dyles' beef with us, and point out that, as our forces are composes of primarily organic, quick-growing units, if Dyles should ever compromise us to a significant degree, it would probably be unstoppable.
We should totally team up!

Also, though. What do/would the Protoss make of Dyles? Have they encountered it yet? Maybe we should make the same deal with them.

>>16535733
What if they decide that we're too great a threat, and need to be sterilized before we can be used by Dyles?

>>16535733
>Also, thought.
I need a new keyboard.
>>16535751
Then they'll mobilise a large attack force, head for Korpulu Sector, and start dicking around here. Which is basically what we want them to do anyway, they'll just be shooting at our units as well as Dyles'.
I'm fairly certain we can handle them, unless they have their own Kingston.

>>16535682
Cyberbrate could build more Terminators (I was going to keep denying the name, but let's face it: they're totally Terminators), but they are very expensive and keeping control of them is very difficult without releasing them to their own programming. Cyberbrate reminds us that this programming was specifically designed by VoidGate.

(You've got your vote. You'll need two more!)

>5
(/tg/ dice, you've got an agenda)

Almost all of their memories are here. We look at what these men knew about the UED's recent history.

It seems that Project Purification, the effort to root out mutants, cyborgs, and other "undesirables" from humanity that resulted in the Terrans of the Koprulu Sector (among other things), ended dramatically. A rogue scientist, realizing that humanity's newfound lack of cybernetic implants limited reaction times and isolated the human element from the machine, created a series of combat drones that began to systematically kill humans involved in political and military decision-making, and interfaced with the machines they used. In two years, he had basically taken control of 2/3rds of the world's weapons and commerce. The UPL fell apart, unable to fight the machines with even the purest examples of humanity. It looked very much like this man would be a Warp Age Caesar, until several cyborgs (often erroneously called "The Last Cyborgs," despite there being entire underground communities at the time) used their combinations of flesh and machine to lock the scientist out of several key systems, corner him, and physically blast his torso into particulate matter.
[CONT]

>>16535829
If we assume that there is only one Kingston for every 50 billion humans (just a guess at the pre war population of the sector), then the UED should have... a dozen or more.

>>16535751

We have to work under the assumption that they won't be amenable to any sort of long-term alliance with what they would perceive as a bunch of murdering infesting insects. Hell, I don't even think that the Morians would have even considered talking to us if they weren't at our mercy.

As for the Protoss & Dyles... perhaps we could arrange a meeting with Khas or Tassadar (or whichever senior leadership protoss will see us) to show them the Dyles entity firsthand. Perhaps we could capture a specimen and show it to them to demonstrate that we weren't bullshitting them about the whole thing.

Ideally, we should embroil the Protoss into a conflict with either the UED or the Dyles entity, but so far it seems that Protoss space is fairly far away from where we expect the conflict with Dyles to take place.

>>16535863

With the only heroes in the world overcoming an evil dictator with the power of cybernetics, a new age of integration dawned. A lot of the fervor has died down over time, but it's a public "secret" that the military still uses extensive cybernetic modification on even standard troops. The scientists we infested had heard rumors that some covert parts of the government even bred people in secret for intense implantation from birth.

The UED had never encountered alien life before Dyles attacked. It had found and covered up the Xel'Naga fragment, but that was older than humanity and obviously damaged beyond repair. This invasion has been their first contact.

>>16535864
Terrifying.

>>16535733
>Protoss on Dyles

The Protoss did become much more willing to work with us toward peace when they learned of Dyles and the UED...

>>16535886
Well, 1 to 2 dozen BEFORE Dyles attacked. I now have a new crazy plan for dealing with Dyles controlled worlds, a psionic null net. Put it around a planet and wait for the parasites to die off. Don't know who it'd work, but reprogramming the terminators would be a good idea.

>>16535886
>>16535863

Sounds like a weird combination of Ghost in The Shell SAC and Terminator, with some Dues Ex thrown in for good measure.

Seeing as they're all newbies to the whole alien race relations thing, they probably tried to deal with Dyles using an unrefined version of the "Humanity fuck yeah" approach. This probably didn't turn out so good.

>Zerg Quest
Don't you mean "Tyranid Quest?"

>>16535983
You're about 55 threads late to start that shit.

I JUST FUCKING REALIZED

SKYNET WOULD HAVE BEEN PERFECT FOR ERRADICATING DYLES.

THEY FAUGHT MOSTLY THROUGH NUCLEAR ANNIHILATION, WERE DEATH INCARNATE TO MELEE WARRIORS, WERE IMMUNE TO ASSIMILATION AND WERE HELLBENT ON BEING THOROUGH. THATS WHY THEY WERE SENDING THEIR LAST STRONGHOLD TWARDS THAT DYLES WORLD IN UED SPACE. FUCKSHIT

GODDAMNIT ALL. WE NEED TO RESSURECT SKYNET.

>>16536000
OR we could rewrite the programing so it isn't going to kill us or our pet terrans, EVER, then start churning out terminators to deal with Dyles. Or, you know nukes, carriers, and numbers.

>>16536000

I know it sounds crazy, guys, but he got quads. Maybe we should listen to him.

>>16535884
>>16535935
>psionic null net
Get that thing up and running
Sell it to UED in return for NO BACKSTAB K?
???
BACKSTAB!!!
>>16535886
Invite some Protoss to Lutrious. If there's still some Dyles hanging around, let them glass the infected areas. They like doing that.

>>16536000

Death incarnate in small cramped spaces with plenty of long hallways to spare. But in the open, though they were fierce combatants, we mowed them down with a few well-placed ultralisks as fast as we would any Terran fortification. We were also able to match them in space-to-space combat, or stall them long enough for us to land ground forces at vital locations. We gradually wore VoidGate down and through cunning and ingenuity and some luck, we triumphed.

We could probably rig up a ZergNet now if we put our minds to it. Accountantbrate might have an aneurysm when we ask him to estimate the cost of it, but it could be a good way to supplement our ground forces.

>>16536047
>>16536000
>Work on getting VoidGate back online: 1
>Invite Protoss to Lutrious: 1

(One of these is substantially crazier than the other)

>>16536085
I wonder which.

>>16536085

Let's not get VoidGate back online. We already have Cyberbrate and a vast amount of resources. Let us instead see how we can create a ZergNet that we can use to control and mass-produce terminators/cyberwhatevers that we can direct.

Inviting the Protoss to Lutrious might be a good idea. If Dyles attacks again, they can see with their own eyes that we aren't feeding them a bunch of lies.

>Captcha: retyass you-

Praetor Ret'yass, I choose you!

>>16536122
(Is that a vote for LutriToss?)

Cyberbrate reminds us that it requires large communications equipment to maintain a direct link to its Terminators. Unless that equipment is present on the battlefield, any Terminators will need to be automated.

>>16536122
Implying the protoss would come. One of the Jellies might, who could then relay what they see back. Though that does raise the question of whether or not the parasites can affect archons, I'd assume not but...

>>16536139

It is a vote for LutriToss.

We can be accommodating on any measure they will place to ensure that we don't just infest the shit out of any protoss they send and say "oh he died. How sad. No, we can't send the bodies back to you. Also, did I tell you about this new awesome not-protoss hybrid we have now?"

>>16536085
No, scrap those stupid options.
Have Cyberbrate go through the Terminator's neural net CPU architecture and programming to make sure that there are no VoidGate backdoors or hidden protocols (like rebuild VoidGate). Then once done, repair a factory and begin production.

>>16536175

Seconding.

Also see if there's any VoidGate construction shenanigans that we can apply to building our own Terran stuff faster or better.

(It's always right after the big events that we get all lazy! It's alright. We got some backstory and a challenge from a rival power in here, as well as got the ball rolling on some ideas. Next week, though, you should get together and do something. I'll most likely be drinking, so a splendid time is sure to be had by all)

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/16533628/

(For >>16535971, pic was my very broad inspiration. I'm willing to admit that I like it way too much)

>>16536175
>>16536279
Cyberbrate is astounded by the independent operation protocols. There are contingencies in there for hundreds of bizarre situations, as well as thousands for more mundane ones. There are substantial files on dealing with being trapped in Earth's past, including detailed files on assassinating major figures. Cyberbrate isn't even sure where to start cutting to keep VoidGate's possible back doors shut. It assures us this is possible, but warns that it will take a while.

(You'll have to vote on that again next time!)

>>16536352
>next time
GOD-FUCKING-DAMMIT!!

>>16536401
(Sorry! You only had two votes, though, and it's hard to get three this late, anyway. You'll have a much better shot of getting stuff done next week! Think positive!)