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  • File : 1323121211.png-(81 KB, 802x530, 1322966467626.png)
    81 KB Warhammer 40k: Heretical Love Part IV Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)16:40 No.17116254  
    “So Ailia, any clue as to what is going on with this planet?” You ask, as the cockpit opens back up.

    The Tau girl shrugs as she wades into the hot spring once again to wash herself off, and you do the same.

    “My brother is the Commander, but I haven’t been able to get a hold of him. He’s too tough to die, though.” She says softly as water cascades down her hair.

    “As far as the human presence on this planet, the last time I knew anything was before the Orks started piling on the bodies.”

    You had hoped for a more optimistic answer, that perhaps some guard had slipped away and were holed up somewhere high and hard with some heavy armor. It’s depressing to think that everyone you knew in the guard, all of your friends, are dead.

    The two of you spend the next hour or so in idle chit chat, Ailia always keeping an eye out for more ‘nids. You get another face full as she leaps back onto you, a stick having floated by and nudged her in the back.

    “I’ve got to go try to link back up with my brother, he will be wondering what’s taken me so long…” She finally declares, doing her best to shake herself dry.

    “Here.” Ailia says, holding out her personal communicator.
    “Let’s exchange numbers!” The Tau girl says with a sincere smile.

    You hold out your own after digging it out of one of your belt pouches.
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)16:41 No.17116271
    “H-hey, I’ve never done this before…”

    “Don’t worry, I’m experienced, I’ll be gentle.”

    “Wow, your encryption is so huge! I don’t think it’s going to fit!”

    “Relax babe, just enjoy the connection.”

    “Ahh! No! It-its too much!”

    “Hold on, here comes my data! I’m uploading!!!”

    “Hahhh! Your data, its filling me up!”

    “Take all of my packets you dirty bitch!”

    -Contact added-

    “Cool, now I can give you a call after I find my brother and figure out what’s going on!” Ailia sticks her own device back inside the battle suit, before climbing back inside.

    “Wait, your leaving?” You ask, again unhappy at the thought of being alone again.

    “Sorry Max, but I’ll call you again for sure.” Ailia smiles.

    “And maybe next time I’ll show you some Tau customs…” She continues slyly.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:41 No.17116275

    next goal: fuck her faceslit
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)16:42 No.17116279
    You watch sadly as the Crisis battle suit fades into the distance, a cold breeze rustling your jimmies.

    It’s not too far of a trek back to the armory, and you change into some new Commissar digs when you get there. You keep the same hat though.

    Sitting down, you snack on a ration as you ponder what to do next.

    [ ] Scout the Warp disturbance nearby. The Daemonettes are both sexy and terrifying.

    [ ] Spy on what has the Orks acting so weird, you’ve never seen them like THIS.

    [ ] The Necrons are surely up to something sinister…

    [ ] Find the Mechanicus and see if anyone is still alive there.

    [ ] You don’t know much about Dark Eldar, but you aren’t
    exactly sure you want to know more.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:44 No.17116296
    >tau customs
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:44 No.17116303
    [X] Scout the Warp disturbance nearby. The Daemonettes are both sexy and terrifying.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:45 No.17116305
    [x] Find the Mechanicus and see if anyone is still alive there.

    Dem dendrites.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:45 No.17116306
    >[X] The Necrons are surely up to something sinister…

    time for some sweet innocent robot undead ass
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:45 No.17116310
         File1323121516.jpg-(425 KB, 800x1105, 1287265230232.jpg)
    425 KB
    >[X] You don’t know much about Dark Eldar, but you aren’t exactly sure you want to know more.
    >[ ] Scout the Warp disturbance nearby. The Daemonettes are both sexy and terrifying.
    if Khornettes are involved.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:45 No.17116311
    Fuck the system i'm voting twice
    [X] Scout the Warp disturbance nearby. The Daemonettes are both sexy and terrifying.

    [X] Spy on what has the Orks acting so weird, you’ve never seen them like THIS.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:47 No.17116338
    Futanaris everywhere. We'll give 'em some prostate orgasms, or stick it in their urethra.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:48 No.17116342
    >> [x ] Scout the Warp disturbance nearby. The Daemonettes are both sexy and terrifying.

    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)16:49 No.17116348
    >picking the multiple-penis futa girls route

    huh, wouldn't have guessed it, thought you would go for some delicious DE

    Well, not my place to judge
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:49 No.17116353
    Shush, and go back to tgchan.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:49 No.17116354
    not only slaaneshi
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:50 No.17116358
    please don't go down this route
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:50 No.17116359

    In the shower at most.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:50 No.17116366
    >huh, wouldn't have guessed it, thought you would go for some delicious DE

    /tg/ is acting up again after another thread complaining about the moderation.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:50 No.17116367
    Eh, Deldar girls have better abs anyways.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:50 No.17116368
    Suggestion for long-term goal: three-way with Esh and Ailia.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:51 No.17116370
    and khornettes have even better ones.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:52 No.17116379
         File1323121952.jpg-(43 KB, 521x364, officieren-westerbork.jpg)
    43 KB
    Strange, everybody chooses the showers when they're offered the choice between tgchan and those.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:52 No.17116382
    Steroid guts will do that.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:53 No.17116389
    /tg/ love dickgirls. oh well,
    >[ ] Find the Mechanicus and see if anyone is still alive there.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:53 No.17116391
    i don't think an average human has the stamina nor strength to successfully "satisfy" a khornette.

    the Dark Eldar would be a safer choice
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)16:55 No.17116404
    Well you have had some fun so far no doubt, but maybe it’s time to serious up a bit.

    That warp hole nearby was spitting out daemons like a fat feral world girl spits out children. But the latest image from the servo skull shows an open warp hole but no flow of horrific denizens of the warp.

    Something obviously isn’t right.

    A Chimera should prove easier to drive than a Sentinel, you think. Right up until you lower yourself into the drivers compartment…

    “How the fuck are there this many LEVERS?!” You shout, offended at the sight.

    After a bit of agitated flailing and bashing of the controls, you manage to get the APC moving.

    Several seconds later however, you realize the Chimera is quickly gaining speed and you don’t know how to slow down.

    “FFFFFFFFFFfffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuu…” You are headed dead center at the open warp hole.

    Wrenching the controls, you manage to just barely avoid it as you crash right into a large and apparently sturdy wall.

    The tank slams quickly to a halt, and you hear the engine quit. Must have pissed off the machine spirit when you insultingly slammed it headlong into a seven hundred meter wide stationary building.

    Your head hurts, having bounced hard off of all things, a lever. Still, you crawl out of the back hatch to assess the damage.

    You are just about to see if you can back out; get a Maaco paint job, and hope no one notices, when a dark voice stops you in your tracks.
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)16:56 No.17116417
    “You dare disturb me? Dare to destroy my feast, insufferable mortal wretch?” The voice seemingly coming from everywhere.

    You are sweating hard, painfully aware at how inadequate the pistol now feels clutched in your hand which is trembling slightly.

    “You… You shall have to fill it’s place!”

    A set of fangs sinks into your thigh.

    “OW what the fuck!?” You yell as you turn to face your assailant.

    Expecting a towering, terrifying, horrific daemon, you aren’t exactly sure what to think about what you actually see.

    “You wrecked my lunch you big dumb meanie!” She screams.

    The daemonette is small, much smaller than the others. Unlike the ones you saw yesterday, her boobs are nearly non-existent and hidden in a thin black tube top. Her face is young and far less menacing then the older versions. A small fang juts out from her lip as she scowls at you.

    You would call her cute if you were not still concerned about how many ways she could likely torture you to death.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:57 No.17116421
    the only reason why there were so many jews going to extermination camps was because it was a free ride and housing.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:58 No.17116431
         File1323122329.jpg-(29 KB, 500x500, 4874_paedobear.jpg)
    29 KB
    This pleases me immensely.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)16:58 No.17116434
         File1323122339.jpg-(147 KB, 761x818, babby d.jpg)
    147 KB
    BABBY D!
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)16:59 No.17116440
    You notice a table flipped over, and various food items littered about it, each in a varying state of disarray. You are just about to apologize when she kicks you in the shin.

    “You little brat!” You shout, and before you realize it you have picked up the little daemon by her leg and are now holding her upside-down.

    The short skirt she was wearing obeys gravity and before you know it you are staring at the backside of a daemon.

    “S-stripes?” You manage to stutter before she catches you in the chin with her other foot. In retrospect, totally worth it, yellow and white is an interesting combo.

    “You perv!” The little daemon yells as she kicks you again.

    You let her go as you avoid another blow, and she falls to the ground with a pomf.

    She glowers furiously at you, the animosity apparent. Her eyes narrow further and you expect perhaps to be eaten by the warp. But just then, a single tear streaks down her purple face.

    You realize she is crying, though trying to hold back her tears and avoiding your gaze.

    “All I wanted was to eat in peace, and you wrecked it…” She sobs.

    Well now you feel like an asshole.

    [ ] Get out of dodge, she could rip your limbs off with just a twinge of a mood change.

    [ ] Comfort her, you think you saw some rations in the Hellhound.

    [ ] Her defenses are down, attack!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:00 No.17116447
    >yellow and white

    ow, what the fuck?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:02 No.17116463
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:03 No.17116472
    [X] Comfort her, you think you saw some rations in the Hellhound.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:03 No.17116474
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:03 No.17116475
    Kill loli, rape corpse, it's not heresy if you kill it first.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:04 No.17116480
    Kill it.
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)17:04 No.17116484

    Its a fucking Chimera, now quit oogling the pretty tanks on the GW website and get back to writing!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:05 No.17116489
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:06 No.17116499
         File1323122792.png-(46 KB, 306x238, -_- 16.png)
    46 KB
    Fuck. YEAR!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:07 No.17116504
    start drawing fanart of this scene, Ribbonfag
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:08 No.17116519
    Get those fucking rations.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:10 No.17116535
    feed her, we are not a murderer
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)17:11 No.17116545
    >tie between attacking her and feeding her

    have to say, did not expect this
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:12 No.17116551
    roll dice
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:12 No.17116552
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:13 No.17116555
    If dubs, we kill her.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:14 No.17116570
         File1323123283.png-(287 KB, 1024x634, 1279127524720.png)
    287 KB

    kill the daemon
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:14 No.17116573

    we DOUBLE-kill her
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:14 No.17116574
    Comfort her, surely nothing could go wrong!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:15 No.17116579
    Thank god we aren't on neither /b/ nor /v/.

    Nom nom. Not pew pew.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:15 No.17116582
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:15 No.17116584
         File1323123330.png-(119 KB, 822x501, heresy_sandpit.png)
    119 KB
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:15 No.17116589
         File1323123359.jpg-(199 KB, 1400x815, -_- 144.jpg)
    199 KB
    >implying Im ribbonfag
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:16 No.17116591
    that's ironic, right?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:16 No.17116597
    Now the Loli will rape us
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:17 No.17116602
    If dubs, we kill her again.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:17 No.17116605
    okay, only once will be enough
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:17 No.17116606
    >> Throw Away Your Common Sense 12/05/11(Mon)17:17 No.17116608
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:19 No.17116621
         File1323123579.jpg-(271 KB, 1584x1106, IMG_0006.jpg)
    271 KB
    kill it

    kill it with fire
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:20 No.17116632
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:21 No.17116641

    >Everyone else doesn't have my opinion.

    Kill the bitch. Suffer not the loli to live.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:22 No.17116648
    >Implying Max will manage to kill her

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:22 No.17116649
    You're just jealous of my dubs.
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)17:22 No.17116651
    “H-hey, don’t cry!” You stammer, you are really not sure what to make of this situation.

    She looks back up at you with her wet eyes, fat tears still streaming down her face.

    “I think I’ve got some food in that tank, let me see if I can find it.”

    You rummage through the back of the Chimara.

    Lasgun cleaning supplies, various junk items, latest edition of Admechgirl…

    Found them!

    You drag out the box of rations and choose the “chicken emperor salad” as it’s one of the least awful ones.

    The little girl begins to eagerly devour the food. You aren’t sure how, you can barely stomach any of those things.

    The daemon girl isn’t watching, this might be the only chance you have.

    Silently you draw your sword, inching it from its scabbard, praying she doesn’t notice. It looks like she’s remained oblivious as she continues to stuff her face.

    It turns your stomach a little to think you are about to lop off the head of this cute little daemon, still, to do otherwise would be heresy.

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:23 No.17116662
    [X] Her defenses are down, attack!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:23 No.17116665
    rolled 9 = 9

    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)17:24 No.17116673
    You spin around in time to see a chain axe speeding toward your face. Barely managing to block the blow, the force of it throws you back nonetheless.

    The Khornette laughs madly, swinging the axe in blazing arcs as you struggle to keep up. Each strike you block knocks you backwards from the force.


    It’s no use, you finally realize. She’s far too strong, you can barely keep up and you are tiring fast.

    In a last ditch effort you grip the sword above your head, trying desperately to somehow put her on the defensive.

    The chain axe catches you in the gut, roaring and spraying with blood and guts as it burrows ever deeper into you.

    Pain, excruciating pain.

    You are laying on your back, your broken mind trying to stuff your own intestines back into the gaping wound.

    Slowly though, a numbness begins to creep out into your body. You are so cold now. Your world grows dark...
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:24 No.17116675
    >latest edition of Admechgirl…
    Whatever comes next, ignore it and get to fappin'
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:25 No.17116684
    rolled 2 = 2

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:26 No.17116688
    rolled 18 = 18

    We should have just killed her.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:26 No.17116696
    you keep doing this
    >inb4 not trolling
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:26 No.17116697
    The Khornate still would kill us
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:27 No.17116699
    Oh, still had my trip for Miracle/Hind on.
    +switching personality+
    Girls! Spoon! Daemonettes! Blueberry creampies! Harem! Primach Aran!

    Okay, I am now in the right mind.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:27 No.17116701
    dubs with a high roll
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:29 No.17116717
    rolled 7 = 7

    Double dubs with a high roll, the emperor is with us today.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:29 No.17116728

    Did they close /b/?
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)17:29 No.17116729

    No, you caught a chain axe to the middle. Khornettes man, reason you almost never hear about them is because no one lives to tell the tale.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:30 No.17116737
    you mad because it's not what you chose?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:30 No.17116744
    Let's just reload from the last savegame.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:30 No.17116747
    ok, you're trolling
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:31 No.17116751
    >implying writefag dont have something in store for this
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:31 No.17116752
    well fuck 9/10
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:34 No.17116782
         File1323124454.png-(262 KB, 826x667, 1315927058170.png)
    262 KB
    It's over? So that means no more inquisitor penis jokes?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:34 No.17116786
    We've had worse.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:34 No.17116789
    Ah well, best to just relax and enjoy our death as best we can.

    We will continue this quest in the Warp. There's daemonettes there, of the proper grown-up variety!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:34 No.17116792
         File1323124487.jpg-(5 KB, 225x225, slowpokomissar.jpg)
    5 KB
    [X ] Her defenses are down, attack!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:36 No.17116808
    Hey she promised to fuck us while we die get to writing that!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:37 No.17116813
    Papa-N, this just so, so, so very wrong. I have gone blase against these deaths! This shouldn't be! I mean, what's the point of the deaths if I can't feel the horror?

    . . .
    Ruinous Powers, I feel like playing F:S/N again, saving at each options and trying all the routes just to see how dead (or worse!) can Shirou be.

    And, no, I am not being sarcastic... Well, at least I am feeling glee each time Max died or having fates worse than death. Wait, I am happier whenever he got fates worse than death! Yeah! Death is cheap in 40k, anyway!

    >inb4 guro
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)17:38 No.17116819
    It’s so hard to open your eyes, as though some dick techpriest has glued them shut as a prank after an all night drinking binge.


    The voice sounds so far away, but the power emanating from it is something beyond comprehension.

    “Hey, Max. Dude wake up.”

    Finally you manage to crack open your eyes, your vision a bit blurry.

    The Emperor himself is peering down, at you. His golden armor is brilliant against the white background, gleaming as though it was brand new.

    He is waxing a surf board.

    “E-Emprah?” You manage, weakly.

    The Emperor nods. “Yeah bro, it’s me.”

    It’s a struggle to move your head as you look around. The whole place is just an endless backdrop of white, as though this place exists but doesn’t.

    “Am I dead?” You finally ask, unable to look down at your own stomach for fear of what you might see.

    The Emperor turns back to his board, a brilliant green one.
    “Yeah man, you caught one in the stomach, didn’t you? You are dead, kinda.”

    Finally you look down, but with a bit of relief you notice that the wound isn’t there. It takes all of your strength to sit up.

    “Emprah, I… I’m so sorry, I’ve been so heretical and…”

    The Emperor stands up, his size is daunting. This is beyond your abilities of your mind, to be so close to your god.

    “Listen dude, you are the first human I’ve spoken to in a loooonnggg time. I didn’t bring you here without having my reasons.”
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:40 No.17116836
    Oh God
    I did not expected this
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:40 No.17116837
         File1323124845.jpg-(322 KB, 476x621, 1308993433948.jpg)
    322 KB
    rolled 3 = 3

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:41 No.17116843
    Told you fags that Papa-N had something
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:42 No.17116850
         File1323124944.jpg-(10 KB, 180x180, 48893_100001803910970_3375606_(...).jpg)
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    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)17:48 No.17116894
    Your mind is reeling, the Emperor brought you here personally after you were slain by a Khornette? It has to be some kind of death hallucination.

    The Emperor turns and stares out a small window that has opened itself up in the white, through it, what looks like a view of a galaxy. You can’t help but notice, he looks… Sad…

    “I’ve been watching for millennia as the universe as we know it tears itself apart at the seams. As my followers, once so righteous and devout, stray from my path and falsify my word.”

    This can’t be happening, there just is no way.

    “Its… Depressing, to say the least.” He mutters, resting his chin on his fist in deep thought.

    If it’s real, than surely you can speak to the Emperor. But since it’s fake, there’s no way he will answer you. This is obviously some kind of chaos god trick.

    “Emprah, if I may ask… And I do so with only the utmost veneration. Where have you been? What have you been doing?”

    The Emperor turns his gaze back to you, brow knit as though pondering what it means to be a mortal such as yourself.

    What seems like an age passes.

    “Surfing.” He finally admits.

    “I’ve been surfing.”

    “Huh?” You ask, realizing only than how disrespectful you sound.

    “Yeah man. I’ve been taking up lives on feral worlds, ones with nice beaches. Surfing just kind of happened… It had been so long since I had known joy, it really just took over my life.”

    The Emperor has spent the last several thousand years surfing… Your body wasn’t prepared for this.

    The God Emperor shrugs, putting his board aside.

    “But enough about me, I want to talk about YOU.” He says, pointing one gleaming finger right at your forehead.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:50 No.17116910
    I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop. I can almost see it coming.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:50 No.17116911
    >Inb4 Lonely Emps need your service, Guards-Commisar!
    Yay! Soulstripping back jamming!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:50 No.17116916
    >“Surfing.” He finally admits.

    This is where i lost it
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)17:51 No.17116924
         File1323125494.jpg-(108 KB, 453x432, -_- 33.jpg)
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    >I want to talk about YOU
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)17:59 No.17116984
    “Me?” You ask, with a gulp.

    “You.” The Emperor confirms.

    “I’ve been watching you since before your birth, Max. Long have I waited for a mortal righteous and level-headed enough to become my new right hand.”

    Your head is spinning. Tzeentch is obviously playing some kind of trick.

    “It’s not a trick, Max. While I love all of my children, this task is not something I can bestow upon some zealous chapter master or trigger happy Inquisitor. Not without them tainting my goal.”

    “Emprah, I…” But he holds up a hand to quiet you.

    “It was one of my last surfing trips…” His story begins.

    “I was really ripping it up, the surf was intense. Then suddenly this group of feral Orks comes charging out. Only they don’t attack me, they start cheering me on from the shore. I spent a lifetime with this group, teaching them the ways of the board. It was then that I realized the mistake of humanity. We shouldn’t be purging the xenos, in this endless conflict. We should be making the universe a more righteous place, and you seem to understand that… Aside from nearly killing that little daemonette, kind of a dick move broski.”

    The Emperor laughs at your face, which is surely a sight to behold.

    “But first, before I return you to the mortal world, we’re going to a party.”

    Are you a bad enough dude to party with the Emprah?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:00 No.17116998

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:01 No.17117002
         File1323126069.gif-(496 KB, 360x360, 1321784091347.gif)
    496 KB
    >just discover HL:1+2+3 today on suptg
    >notice they're around two days apart each time
    >wait a fucking minute
    >open up /tg/
    >oh wow
    I love this, I hope the general consensus is on the Necrons next thread. I wanna see how that would play out.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:01 No.17117005

    i hope so
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:01 No.17117007
    FUCK. YES.
    Let's do this.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:01 No.17117008
    >Aside from nearly killing that little daemonette, kind of a dick move broski.

    "That dubs commanded me. the dubs!"
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:01 No.17117009
    The question here is,
    Is the Emprah a bad enough dude to party with us?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:02 No.17117010
         File1323126130.png-(52 KB, 836x721, 1296080328459.png)
    52 KB
    rolled 428 = 428

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:02 No.17117011
    And then The God-Emperor of Mankind was The Dude from The Big Lebowski, mixed with some Pauly Shore and a stereotypical California surfer.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:02 No.17117014
    But a Daemonette isn't a Xeno.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:02 No.17117015
    We need to get doomrider in on this
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)18:02 No.17117022
    That is the kind of attitude we need to hold from
    here on out.
    As many 'yes' as there are to be given, my Lord.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:03 No.17117027
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:03 No.17117029
         File1323126221.jpg-(33 KB, 253x320, 1322444501107.jpg)
    33 KB
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:04 No.17117036
    My liver is ready!
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)18:05 No.17117044
    No, I mean that in the best way possible.
    We are the hedonist the Emperor needs, and we should embrace that whole-heartedly.
    I guess.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:06 No.17117054
    Whoops I misread your post
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:07 No.17117061
         File1323126428.png-(476 KB, 610x767, average Bromont thread.png)
    476 KB

    I won't be partying with you.

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:07 No.17117066
         File1323126464.jpg-(69 KB, 400x400, party tau.jpg)
    69 KB
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:07 No.17117067
    This is relevant to Slaanesh's interests.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:08 No.17117072
    Tzeentech and Slaanesh teamed up to fool us.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:09 No.17117081
    > This lil' anon is a wee bit sad there aren't soul-shattering events administered by Emps himself.

    Well, continue on, I guess.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:09 No.17117084
    Well we've already summoned Doom Rider with epic cocaine abuse. It's only natural that Slaanesh would have some hold over us at this point.
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)18:09 No.17117089
    Your broken mind can barely formulate a thought as your lips move on their own.

    “A… Party… Emprah?”

    He reaches down and lifts you to your feet with one hand.

    “Yeah, Chaos gods invited me and told me to bring a friend along. Could have sworn Nurlge said something about Tzeentch but the communication ended before he could finish… Could have sworn he said “shlicking”, whatever that means…”

    He spins you around, looking you over thoughtfully.

    “The Commissar outfit is pretty stylish, but it could use a bit extra. BAM!”

    Your clothes suddenly glow with the light of the Emprah, and they begin to morph. What once was a utilitarian battle garb is now a suit of awesome fit for even the most radical chaos-god house party. They feel just so RIGHT against your skin, as though the Emperor himself had personally tailored them just for you.

    “Emprah be praised… I don’t even know what to say.” You really don’t, this is all just so much so fast.

    The Emperor laughs, a booming but cheerful kind of laugh. The kind of laugh that when you hear at the pub drinking with your homies, you can’t help but crack a smile and laugh along with.

    “Get ready for this, the last mortal I teleported like this described the event as “what?”.” The Emperor rubs his hands together quickly, as though getting ready.


    And your world explodes into color.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:10 No.17117095
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:11 No.17117110

    no better way of putting it.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:11 No.17117111
    Maybe we get to meet that cute Khornette and her sister again...
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:11 No.17117112
    So at the very least, the Emprah, Nurgle, and Tzeentch are bros, and... not a single one of their followers knows about this?
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)18:12 No.17117115
         File1323126732.gif-(59 KB, 550x400, PartyHard.gif)
    59 KB
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:12 No.17117117
    Calling it now: This is a actually Slaanesh in disguise.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:16 No.17117144
         File1323126988.jpg-(168 KB, 800x800, 1294897600241.jpg)
    168 KB
    is that a problem?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:21 No.17117182
    Man, that SoB will be ALL OVER our cock when we tell her we partied with the Emperor.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:26 No.17117238
         File1323127610.jpg-(79 KB, 797x602, -_- 37.jpg)
    79 KB
    >Man, that SoB will be ALL OVER our cock when we tell her we partied with the Emperor.
    >ALL OVER our cock
    >our cock
    Christ, the thought of /tg/'s collected neckbeards share a common cock is gonna leave a horrendous mental scar.
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)18:27 No.17117242
    When your mind finally stops freaking out, man, you take in everything before you.

    This is, without a doubt, the most epic party ever to exist. It is perhaps even the most epic beyond the very fabric of existence, this party might be existence itself.

    The Emperor stands beside you, still wearing his golden armor. Though now a stylish black top hat adorns his head and a massive cane with a swirling galaxy inside it’s shaft, rests in his hand.

    “I did set you up with a few dates, some Daemon girls, cute ones to boot. You were going to get a pick one out of the three, to be decided in a strip competition. But I’m not sure if that’s going to happen now, you REALLY pissed off two of them and the third is mad you tried to off her littlest sister.”

    He nudges you and points over to a table which seats three of the most beautiful beings you’ve ever witnessed.

    The little loli daemonette sits, glowering at you. Only her features are a thousand times more perfect here. She’s wearing a frilly black dress that barely covers her butt, as well as a scowl as she stares.

    That Khornette; the one who, well, killed you, is there as well. Her armor is gone and in its place a brilliant skin tight white dress with an embroidered void dragon snaking up the side. Her skin is a cooler red now, and it looks ridiculously soft and smooth even from here. She mouths “I raped your skull holes” even as she glares.
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)18:28 No.17117256
    A Nurglette, whom you hadn’t seen before, sips a glowing blue drink through a crazy straw. She is wearing a vibrant orange dress which has symbols of Nurlge that move all about it, somehow a moving image inside the fabric itself. The dress revealing enough of her generous cleavage to speed up your heart. Her eyes watch you, and though she doesn’t glare at you like the others, she looks wholly disappointed.

    Now you really wish you hadn’t boned yourself over, a strip competition between these three, the thought almost gives you a heart attack.

    [ ] Surely there is some way you can apologize and get them back on good terms.

    [ ] Approaching three gorgeous ladies, you wouldn’t know what to say… It’s not like you wanted a date or anything…

    [ ] Ask the Emperor for advice, maybe he can help a bro out?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:29 No.17117273
    [x ] Surely there is some way you can apologize and get them back on good terms.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:30 No.17117284
         File1323127859.jpg-(42 KB, 324x281, Skarnerwuv.jpg)
    42 KB
    [X ] Surely there is some way you can apologize and get them back on good terms.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:31 No.17117290
    [X] Ask the Emperor for advice, maybe he can help a bro out?

    Just to read him talking again.

    captcha: phreak nouveau
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:31 No.17117292
    [X ] Surely there is some way you can apologize and get them back on good terms.

    This a hundred times
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:31 No.17117293
    This isn't the Emperor at all! I mean, look around, where's Slaneesh?
    That being said, Apologize to the girls. I mean, really, you were in a damn WAR ZONE and had seen your comrades ripped to pieces by women very similar to these. War is hell and sometimes you have to kill to survive.
    We AT LEAST gave her a last meal before we tried attacking.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:31 No.17117296
    >[X] Surely there is some way you can apologize and get them back on good terms.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:31 No.17117299
    >[x] Ask the Emperor for advice, maybe he can help a bro out?
    He's the only one who seems to know WTF is going on here.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:31 No.17117300
    Im going with this one, despite my better judgement and common sense. I fortell painfull things in the future
    >[x] Surely there is some way you can apologize and get them back on good terms.
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)18:32 No.17117307
    Well, if that's true...
    [X] Ask the Emperor fr advice, maybe he can help a bro out?
    If anybody could help us get laid, it's Empraneesh.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:33 No.17117314
    They're demons, so they know what it means to be ruled by the numbers of their gods. The dubs command us as well.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:34 No.17117329
         File1323128091.jpg-(204 KB, 1151x783, d5d52c6a682dbdb5647b22a5350f00(...).jpg)
    204 KB
    rolled 28 = 28

    id say to ask the empra
    this is all so heretical, i dont know
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:38 No.17117354
    [X] Ask the Emperor for advice, maybe he can help a bro out?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:38 No.17117361
    This is why I hate /tg/ sometimes.

    "Hurr Durr we maed Angry Marines"

    Yeah? What cool-fucking army ideas have you made for other races?

    "urr... no. Mehreens are all we do".

    Seriously, there needs to be a "fucking raeg" army for each faction.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:39 No.17117371

    > Tau wingman? Space Wolf bro? Celestial Lion? Salamander? Papa-N saw your requests and gives you the best of the best broski to watch your six and occasionally pick you up from the shits you got yourself into: Meeeeeeet the Big E! Emps! In all His glorious dudeski radiance!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:39 No.17117373
    >Implying World Eaters aren't raeg enough
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:40 No.17117388
    >[ ] Surely there is some way you can apologize and get them back on good terms.
    They shouldn't even be that angry with us. We're the only one who got killed.

    And anyway, even if we had succeeded, it would have been a new sensation for the little daemonette. How can she complain about that?

    A simple "Sorry I tried to stab you in the back" should suffice.
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)18:42 No.17117417
    “Hey Emprah…” You start to ask, but he shakes his head at you.

    “You are a far out dude, Max, but you’ve made your bed and you’re going to have to sleep in it. All I can tell you is that those three are close knit, don’t expect it to be easy to win them back. They were all really excited about meeting you too…”

    With that, the Emperor heads off to a bar containing every drink to have ever existed. You can’t blame the guy, you did screw it up for yourself.

    He was bro enough to set you up with a chance of a lifetime, not his fault you frittered it away.

    You aren’t going to give up though, thoughts of jiggling daemonette bits getting thrown around in your face. You will win these three over, you are just going to have to be one smooth ass operator.

    As you approach the table, the three girls stare at you even harder. You can almost feel the dislike emanating from each of them.

    This isn’t going to be easy.

    You clear your throat.

    Roll for speechcraft.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:43 No.17117425
    Wait a minute.

    How the fuck are they all there, when you're dead, they're living and the Emprah is... the Emprah? WTF is going on.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:43 No.17117427
    rolled 10 = 10

    d20 right?
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)18:44 No.17117434
    yep, rolls in these threads are 1d20 unless stated otherwise
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:44 No.17117435
    rolled 3 = 3

    Uh, what am I rolling?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:44 No.17117438
    rolled 8 = 8

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:44 No.17117439
    rolled 20 = 20

    >Roll for speechcraft.
    oh boy
    >rolling 1d20
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:45 No.17117440
    rolled 9 = 9

    Wait a tick, Demonettes don't even DIE. They just poof back into the Warp. AT BEST what you did would have been a minor inconvenience for the girl.
    Were as YOU got DEAD.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:45 No.17117441
    Well there was a warp rift right next to where we died. They could have just stepped back in after killing you.

    Also, time flows strangely in the Warp. Who knows how long we've been dead.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:45 No.17117442
    Gonna talk our way into a massive flood of demon-cum.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:45 No.17117444
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:45 No.17117448
    rolled 10 = 10

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:45 No.17117449
         File1323128741.png-(29 KB, 184x199, -_- 42.png)
    29 KB
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)18:45 No.17117452
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:46 No.17117458
    rolled 13 = 13

    Well shit. Hope that ONE Nat 20 helps us.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:46 No.17117461
    I just wonder where Tzenchette is. Considering that big T is a gal where big E is concerned, maybe His presence causes all Tzenchette to orgasm in close proximity?

    > Aren't they lovely~
    > Aren't they beooootiful~
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:46 No.17117467
    Dammit. What are we supposed to do when a dozen people all roll for the same thing? Take an average of them all?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:47 No.17117479
    Nat 20 always prevails.
    Only if we got a nat 1.
    Then we are fucked
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:47 No.17117481
    That kills the point of rolling, IMO, since the distribution will tighten so much. You might as well say you roll a 10 for everything.

    Eh, OP asked for it.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:48 No.17117485
    I've never rolled before I hope it goes well
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:50 No.17117507
    Almost, you need to put the number of dice before the d.

    so, dice+1d20, not dice+d20.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:50 No.17117508
    rolled 8 = 8

    You need to put a 1 before the d20.
    noko+dice+1d20 is what you need.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:50 No.17117509
    rolled 2 = 2


    it's 'dice+1d20'

    Also, rollan. I want's me that Khornette.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:51 No.17117514

    You really want that nat 1, right?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:51 No.17117521
         File1323129103.jpg-(12 KB, 358x263, rage1.jpg)
    12 KB

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:51 No.17117523
    rolled 1 = 1

    Oh ok thanks guys!
    Here I go!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:51 No.17117526
         File1323129119.jpg-(236 KB, 638x900, IMG_0118.jpg)
    236 KB
    rolled 14 = 14

    rollan, we're probably fucked here
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:52 No.17117530
         File1323129147.png-(9 KB, 344x341, -_- 55.png)
    9 KB
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:52 No.17117532

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:52 No.17117536

    At least whatever they do to us, we can't really die in the Warp.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:53 No.17117548
    rolled 4 = 4

    Rollin for demonic sexytimes
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:53 No.17117549
         File1323129225.jpg-(12 KB, 360x301, rage2.jpg)
    12 KB
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:53 No.17117551
    Nah, whether nat 1 or nat 20, Max will be fucked.

    Sadly, that ain't an innuendo. Chtul-fish?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:53 No.17117552
    rolled 10 = 10


    God dammit. If dubs, we are successful.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:54 No.17117555
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:54 No.17117557
    You die in the warp, you die for real!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:54 No.17117558
    You, good Sir, are an incredible idiot.

    I do blame you as well.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:54 No.17117559
         File1323129269.jpg-(106 KB, 611x716, 1314539186146.jpg)
    106 KB
    I... I'm so sorry
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:54 No.17117562
    rolled 10 = 10

    >have a slightly above average series of rolls
    >idiots keep rolling
    >now trying to unfuck us cause of idiots
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)18:55 No.17117571

    >roll a nat20
    >keep rolling until you get a nat1

    I'm laughing so hard right now, you guys really want to be strapped down and ass raped by a daemon prince train that badly?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:55 No.17117579
    Ok Papa-N
    It's time for your troll post
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)18:55 No.17117580
    Don't blame me, blame Anon!
    You want a 20, I can get a 20, but it won't be a natural one, that's for sure!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:57 No.17117601
    rolled 3, 11, 14, 18, 1, 10, 12, 4, 11, 8, 7, 7, 19, 2, 15, 2, 10, 2, 8, 15 = 179

    I've decided, fuck everything.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:57 No.17117604
    rolled 19 = 19

    More like, dying in the Warp offers no escape from the killer. You can get killed over and over again forever.

    Trying for a second 20.
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)18:58 No.17117613
    >troll post

    Sorry, my hands are kind of tied...

    The Khornette knocks you out before you have time to react.

    When you awaken, you realize your hands are bound above your head and your legs are spread wide.

    Something is choking you.

    And it isn't a gag...
    >> Inquistorial Librarian 12/05/11(Mon)18:58 No.17117614
    Frak. Wrong thread. Stupid tabs.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:58 No.17117615
    I give up. There's now way to play this with all the trolls here today.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:59 No.17117623
         File1323129541.jpg-(112 KB, 300x385, SS_Indrick_Boreale.jpg)
    112 KB
    rolled 1 = 1

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:59 No.17117624
    rolled 10 = 10

    >rolled 3, 11, 14, 18, 1, 10, 12, 4, 11, 8, 7, 7, 19, 2, 15, 2, 10, 2, 8, 15 = 179
    >rolled 3, 11, 14, 18, 1
    >rolled 1

    Fuck you too
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)18:59 No.17117629
         File1323129582.jpg-(15 KB, 145x172, 1320739584668.jpg)
    15 KB
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)18:59 No.17117632
         File1323129597.gif-(158 KB, 250x182, 1310194785322.gif)
    158 KB
    rolled 20 = 20


    Fuck. You.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:00 No.17117633
    Oh Fuck my life
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)19:00 No.17117644
    You just enter the dice command in the text box for it to not show up in the email field, right? I've got an idea...
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:01 No.17117650

    I believe it's hidden when you use noko+dice+1d20

    it's the noko that hides it?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:01 No.17117657
    rolled 12 = 12

    Oh well...

    We should make a conscious effort to find pleasure in whatever torture the daemonettes have in store for us. Maybe we'll gain Slaanesh's favor and thus earn the loli daemonette's forgiveness.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:02 No.17117658
    rolled 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1 = 25

    It's like some kind of idiot parade in here.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:02 No.17117662

    By the way, I actually did roll d20 here : >>17117632
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)19:02 No.17117665
         File1323129753.jpg-(26 KB, 400x229, 1320900327285.jpg)
    26 KB

    It's double rape time

    You realize you are covered in some kind of thick liquid that seems to be dripping out of your every....


    Your eyes fly open entirely, as you realize exactly what is happening.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:02 No.17117668
    no, you just leave noko in the email field, it over-writes the part that changes the name so you can mouse over it.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:03 No.17117677
    Your troll posts stopped being midly amusing some time during the second thread.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:03 No.17117682
    hahahaha, where is the "HUEHEUHEUHEUHEU"
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:03 No.17117686
         File1323129824.jpg-(8 KB, 304x285, fuck.jpg)
    8 KB

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:03 No.17117688
         File1323129836.png-(1 KB, 210x230, 1322658034413.png)
    1 KB
    rolled 13 = 13

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:04 No.17117689
         File1323129852.jpg-(39 KB, 315x346, 1295777492475.jpg)
    39 KB
    rolled 17 = 17

    fucking... you people
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:04 No.17117693
    rolled 17 = 17

    Fuck it, let my fate be casted with a roll of the die.
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)19:04 No.17117700
    rolled 9 + 10 = 19

    Yeah, just checking. Got 4chan+, auto-nokos, so just wanted to make sure.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:05 No.17117705
    Guys, just give up.
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)19:05 No.17117708
    “Ladies…” You begin.

    “Jackass.” The loli interrupts you.

    You sigh and take a seat across from them, their glares don’t let up.

    “I deserve that, I know. Trying to kill you like that was… Underhanded, at best.”

    They don’t seem to care, but you’re not finished yet.

    “I hadn’t ever seen a daemon until just a few short days ago, and the first time I did, well… It was nothing too pleasant. I had a lot of friends in that unit, some guys I had practically grown up with. They were my friends, my brothers, and they are all dead now, those daemonettes didn’t show them any kind of mercy.”

    Your voice chokes up a bit. You aren’t just trying to pull this off, this shit be sincere yo. You hadn’t told anyone this stuff yet, and though it feels good to let it out, it’s painful to relive.
    The daemonette’s faces relax a bit, their eyes growing perhaps a bit softer, as they listen to your story.

    “I mean, my best friend was out there. Douglass Tannar, met him in basic training. Dude saved my life on more than one occasion, he was one of the toughest mother fuckers I’ve ever met. He… He got ripped to pieces right in front of me, and there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it.”

    You bite your lip, suddenly feeling like being here a whole lot less.

    “You know what, I’m sorry, I’m not going to screw up your night. You girls have a fun time…”

    You stand up and start to walk away, deep in thought.
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)19:05 No.17117710
    Desperate times called for desperate measures.
    Yeah, the /tg/ dice have spoken.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:07 No.17117725
    Oh Thank God, Papa-N is kind to us
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:07 No.17117734
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:07 No.17117737

    >In b4 HUE HUE HUE
    >That was the troll post

    >rape incoming
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)19:07 No.17117738
    Until a small hand grabs the back of your uniform lightly.
    It’s the littlest daemonette, and she’s looking you right in the eyes, no longer glaring.

    “It’s ok, I forgive you.” She says quietly, before blushing and turning back to sip her drink.

    “So, what do you suggest we do?” The Khornette asks, stirring her cocktail which looks disturbingly like blood.

    [ ] “Grab a drink, have fun. I’m going to go unsober myself and relive my nightmares.”

    [ ] “I’ll let you guys decide, I really don’t know.”

    [ ] “A bit of friendly competition, perhaps?”
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)19:08 No.17117745
    Papa-N is a merciful story-teller, and the whole of /tg/ thanks him for it.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:08 No.17117751
    >[x] “Grab a drink, have fun. I’m going to go unsober myself and relive my nightmares.”

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:09 No.17117755
    [ x] “A bit of friendly competition, perhaps?”
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:09 No.17117756
    >[ ] “I’ll let you guys decide, I really don’t know.”

    The party is more or less their territory. Let them show us around.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:09 No.17117759
    [ ] “I’ll let you guys decide, I really don’t know.”
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:10 No.17117766
    We need a drink.

    It should make socializing with the unspeakable horrors of the warp a little easier.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:10 No.17117767
    >“I’ll let you guys decide, I really don’t know.”
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:10 No.17117768
         File1323130227.jpg-(97 KB, 504x504, IMG_0064.jpg)
    97 KB
    [X] “Grab a drink, have fun. I’m going to go unsober myself and relive my nightmares.”
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:10 No.17117769
    This, khornettes be lovin dat shit yo
    >[x] “A bit of friendly competition, perhaps?”

    And this is my last post for tonight, me and my nat 20 are gonna spoon all night together
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:10 No.17117770
    [x ] “I’ll let you guys decide, I really don’t know.”
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)19:10 No.17117771
    [X] "I'll let you guys decide, I don't really know."
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:10 No.17117772
    [ X] “A bit of friendly competition, perhaps?”

    Ring a ding dong
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:10 No.17117774
    rolled 6 = 6

    Grab a drink. Rolling for how much we can drink.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:11 No.17117778
    rolled 14 = 14

    >[1-7] “Grab a drink, have fun. I’m going to go unsober myself and relive my nightmares.”

    >[8-14] “I’ll let you guys decide, I really don’t know.”

    >[15-20] “A bit of friendly competition, perhaps?”

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:11 No.17117779

    >[X] “Grab a drink, have fun. I’m going to go unsober myself and relive my nightmares.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:12 No.17117788
    Their choice.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:12 No.17117793
    [ ] “I’ll let you guys decide, I really don’t know.”
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:12 No.17117797
    >[ ] “I’ll let you guys decide, I really don’t know.”
    Better to let them choose.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:14 No.17117805
    rolled 17 = 17


    This is going to go really, really badly.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:14 No.17117809
         File1323130493.jpg-(161 KB, 567x567, 1316915286307.jpg)
    161 KB
    [ ] “I’ll let you guys decide, I really don’t know.”
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:16 No.17117816
         File1323130560.jpg-(157 KB, 514x493, youcanthavecontrol.jpg)
    157 KB
    It fucking better.
    Picture semi-related.
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)19:17 No.17117831
    “I’ll let you girls figure it out, I don’t really know and to be honest I don’t know if I deserve to choose.”

    The three damonettes look between each other, as though they can communicate without words. You watch for a minute as their expressions change, maybe they really can?

    Finally the Nurglette leans back and turns to you.

    “Well, we’ve decided to give you another shot, and we might even continue with our earlier… Plan. But there’s a catch.”

    A catch? You don’t know if you like where this is going.

    “We’ll give you such a sight your mortal eyes might well leap from your head in pleasure, but first, you have to put on a show for us.”

    The three get up and grab onto you, leading you away from the party into a private room.

    The lounge is empty save for you four, and they close the door behind you. Velvety seats sit in front of a stage illuminated by faint red lights.

    Three stripper poles standing erect, dead center.

    “Well, go on than, whelp. ENTERTAIN ME!” The Khornette grunts, giving you a shove toward the stage.

    What is it they want you to do, exactly? Shit, you don’t know.

    [ ] Magic tricks.

    [ ] Time to get funky on this here stage.

    [ ] Stand there, awkwardly.
    >> Inquistorial Librarian 12/05/11(Mon)19:18 No.17117835
         File1323130686.png-(540 KB, 432x585, I like what I am reading.png)
    540 KB
    This thread. All of it.
    And why not, lets keep the ball rolling...
    >[X] "I'll let you guys decide, I don't really know."
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:19 No.17117848
    [x ] Magic tricks.

    Show off exactly how dexterous those hands are.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:19 No.17117850
    [ ] Stand there, awkwardly.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:19 No.17117851
    >[X] Magic tricks.
    Make doomrider appear and then
    >[X] Time to get funky on this here stage.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:19 No.17117852
    rolled 4, 1, 1, 3, 1 = 10

    Magic tricks
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:19 No.17117853
         File1323130771.jpg-(107 KB, 300x400, 1320759471964.jpg)
    107 KB
    >[ ] Magic tricks.

    We are making this happen.
    >> crazy Anon 12/05/11(Mon)19:19 No.17117854
    Let them decide.
    Eh, a bit busy right now. And a bit sad no continuation of troll post.

    PS: No rolls unless demanded.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:19 No.17117857
    Stop rolling for fucks sake!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:20 No.17117858
    rolled 18 = 18

    Magical tricks.
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)19:20 No.17117859
    [x] Magic Tricks
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:21 No.17117866
    Fuck you, I'll keep rolling till we get a 1.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:21 No.17117867
    [x] Stand there, awkwardly.
    >> Inquistorial Librarian 12/05/11(Mon)19:21 No.17117869
    rolled 4 = 4

    Well, since I am late to the last vote....

    Got... to... get... FUNKEH!
    >[X] Time to get funky on this here stage.
    Put the music on.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:21 No.17117871
    rolled 19 = 19

    >[x] Magic tricks.

    All day erry day
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:21 No.17117873
         File1323130888.png-(25 KB, 242x257, 1322204811346.png)
    25 KB
    [ ] Magic tricks.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:21 No.17117875
    >[ ] Time to get funky on this here stage.
    As long as they don't expect us to take off the hat.

    Maybe we are performing a strip-tease show for the daughters of the Chaos Gods, but no officer of the Imperium will be parted from his hat!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:21 No.17117876
    [x] Stand there, awkwardly.

    Spaghetti etc.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:22 No.17117881
    [ X] Time to get funky on this here stage.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:22 No.17117884
    [X] Time to get funky on this here stage.

    Work that pole like you've got daddy issues.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:23 No.17117887
    rolled 20 = 20


    >Magic tricks for god's sake

    >Make spaghetti fall out of the Khornett's pockets
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:23 No.17117889
    [ X] Time to get funky on this here stage.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:23 No.17117892
    Our guardsman seem to be surprisingly competent. Wow.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:23 No.17117894
    [X] Time to get funky on this here stage.

    But keep the hat on.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:23 No.17117895
         File1323131023.gif-(477 KB, 282x161, 1298084964628.gif)
    477 KB

    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)19:23 No.17117896
    It's official, magic tricks.
    STOP ROLLING, HIT F5, get 4chan+ or 4chanX for GOD'S SAKE
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:23 No.17117897
    The Dice Gods (and probably Tzeentch as well) command it!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:24 No.17117898
    Magic tricks.

    Rien de visage
    >> Inquistorial Librarian 12/05/11(Mon)19:25 No.17117903
         File1323131114.png-(199 KB, 500x296, It's magic. I ain't gotta expl(...).png)
    199 KB
    While I am disappoint that we won't see Max getting funky, this should still be an entertaining show.
    >> crazy Anon 12/05/11(Mon)19:25 No.17117904
    Magic tricks. Entertain Lil' D.

    I believe the correct answer should be getting funky on the poles, but whatever.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:25 No.17117905
         File1323131117.jpg-(102 KB, 337x455, 1315296899332.jpg)
    102 KB
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:26 No.17117915
    Can we go for a combo?

    Magically make your clothing disappear and get down on dat stage!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:26 No.17117916
         File1323131181.jpg-(30 KB, 390x339, tom-jones-you-can-leave-your-h(...).jpg)
    30 KB
    [x] Time to get funky on this here stage.
    Hat stays firmly on though!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:26 No.17117917
    hey guys, we're in the warp, and rolled a nat 20 on perform magic tricks, hes going to turn into a greater daemon of tzeentch
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)19:27 No.17117926
    “Dun-nun-nun-na NA NA NA NA!” You begin to sing as you start the magic show.

    Out of a pocket in your threads, you pull out a pack of cards and start shuffling.

    “Dun-nuh-nah nah, NAH NAH NA NAH!”

    You being shuffling the cards furiously, the three girls staring up at you with “what the fuck am I watching” faces.

    “Dah nah na nah na NAH!” You suddenly throw the cards with a snap of your fingers.

    The deck flies out right at the girls.

    The cards cutting the straps of their clothes…

    And their dresses fall to the floor around their feet.

    “POOF!” You yell.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:27 No.17117928
         File1323131257.jpg-(9 KB, 347x291, oh.jpg)
    9 KB

    Well, shit.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:27 No.17117932
    >Street leading from nat 18 to nat 20

    Why, exactly, should it be our clothing that disappears?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:28 No.17117942

    By the emprah
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:28 No.17117944
         File1323131321.gif-(2.5 MB, 333x142, 1314901191492.gif)
    2.5 MB

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:28 No.17117948
         File1323131333.jpg-(24 KB, 484x530, 1316997146807.jpg)
    24 KB
    Hell yeah.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:29 No.17117953
         File1323131369.png-(629 KB, 1280x720, vlcsnap-1518258.png)
    629 KB
    That ought to do the trick
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:30 No.17117957
         File1323131406.jpg-(145 KB, 918x1024, nurgle-chan.jpg)
    145 KB
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:31 No.17117972
         File1323131485.jpg-(68 KB, 438x576, 1310101035552.jpg)
    68 KB
    oh my...
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:32 No.17117979
         File1323131539.jpg-(208 KB, 729x800, Emperor_s Work is Never Done.jpg)
    208 KB

    I like where this is going.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:32 No.17117984
    I see what you did there.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:32 No.17117986
         File1323131574.jpg-(29 KB, 400x297, 1322784459541.jpg)
    29 KB
    >Max at this very moment.
    >> Magic Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:33 No.17117990
    Well shit...
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)19:37 No.17118023
    The three girls just stand there, faces a mixture of shock and awe. Cards litter the floor.

    Oh Emprah.

    Dem underwears.

    The girls each blush hard, clearly having been caught completely off guard.

    Tzeentch is raging from her position at the other end of the party, shredding her paper which reads “Plan”.

    The Khornette is wearing a black lace set, complete with garterbelt. You notice she has a push-up bra, and her tits are slightly smaller than you had expected, a c maybe? Is she perhaps self conscious? Maybe with good reason, when you take a look at the Nurglette.

    Her underwear is far more girly. Pink and more modest, though her bra struggles mightily it can’t completely contain those massive daemonic gifts. It is alarmingly cute.

    The loli is in matching purple panties and bra, each with a printed symbol of Slaanesh on them. She is trying awkwardly to cover herself though.

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:39 No.17118043
         File1323131952.jpg-(155 KB, 757x430, WIZARDS.jpg)
    155 KB
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:39 No.17118044
         File1323131956.gif-(276 KB, 300x300, 1311299752729.gif)
    276 KB

    >Tzeentch is raging from her position at the other end of the party, shredding her paper which reads “Plan”.

    I totally lost it there.
    Umad, lord of change?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:40 No.17118056
    >Tzeentch is raging from her position at the other end of the party, shredding her paper which reads “Plan”

    Tzeentch is a woman?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:40 No.17118059
         File1323132039.gif-(49 KB, 400x250, 1319255864120.gif)
    49 KB
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:40 No.17118060
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)19:41 No.17118066
    better go read the bizarro section of last thread.

    All that shit about Tzeentch?

    Yeah, that's canon ITT.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:41 No.17118067
    well wait, where's our wizard's hat? Unless the commissar hat counts...
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:42 No.17118075


    I suppose Tzeentch can be whatever the damned hell it pleases.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:42 No.17118077
    The Commissar Hat always counts
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:44 No.17118099
         File1323132258.jpg-(16 KB, 251x251, 1319390954146.jpg)
    16 KB
    All commissar's hats are magical.

    They just won't tell the normal folk because if they knew, everyone would have one and go off on amazing ng adventures and that wouldn't be grimdark, would it?

    Also, I think this explains everything that's happened in this thread.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:45 No.17118106

    My god, you're right! This all started with the hat!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:45 No.17118114
    The thread seems to be auto-saging.

    Care to start a new one, OP?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:46 No.17118116
    and to think we almost lost Hat-Chan to that damned tyranids
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:46 No.17118124
         File1323132400.gif-(270 KB, 240x180, 3RYZi.gif)
    270 KB
    To think, we almost let the tyranids eat it.

    That would have been the end of this adventure!

    >mfw no Heretical Love Quest
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:47 No.17118130
    By the emprah, it must be so...
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:48 No.17118134
    Fuck you.
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)19:51 No.17118170
    “Hmph, I’m not going to let you have the last laugh. Prepare yourself, human, for your mind to be melted.” The Khornette snaps as she pushes you off the stage.

    “Oh my, you have some very skilled hands there. Perhaps you can introduce them to me later, more… personally.” The Nurglette coos as she runs her hand down one of the poles.

    “It was… A nice trick.” The loli shrugs.

    Oh yeah, time for this show to begin. You can barely contain your anticipation.

    More multicolored stage lights flip on and an unseen daemonic dj drops a fresh beat.

    The Khornette wastes no time and begins grinding her ass into the pole as she rips her bra down and makes aggressive suggestive movements with her tongue.

    The Nurglette is a bit more modest, and starts off by flipping upside-down and spinning slowly as she slides down the pole.

    The loli looks you right in the eye as she grips the pole hard and close to her body, and begins licking it.

    Their dancing continues, growing ever more intense, each one of them slowly stripping off their remaining garments.

    Slowly, each of them staring right in your eyes, they walk down to you.

    Blood rushing from your head, they all take a seat on your lap.

    “Time to pick your date…” The Nurglette whispers in your ear before giving it a little nibble.

    [ ] Khornette

    [ ] Loli

    [ ] Nurglette

    [ ] “I honestly can’t decide…”
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:53 No.17118187
    Nurglette. /tg/ LOVES Nurgle.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:53 No.17118189
    >[ ] “I honestly can’t decide…”

    Too many wonderful things to choose form.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:53 No.17118190
    [X ] Nurglette
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:53 No.17118195
    >>[x ] Khornette

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:54 No.17118198
    rolled 20 = 20

    >[x] Khornette
    >[x] Khornette
    >[x] Khornette
    >[x] Khornette
    >[x] Khornette
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:54 No.17118200
    There is obviously only one choice here, drool and mumbe incoherently, and finally whisper "beautiful"
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:54 No.17118201
    Nurglette! By the Emprah let it be so!
    >> crazy Anon 12/05/11(Mon)19:54 No.17118202
    Next, we bone big T in lieu of big E. I mean, there aren't any Tzeentchette around!

    Also... That's it? I had hoped that there were more to the magic trick. Like pulling a string of krak grenades and purity seals from your mouth, pulling out a live squig, a chainsword, a powersword, a plasmacannon, and a void grenade out of the commisariat cap, and juggling them.

    Of course, you'd probably need the blessing of big T to do stuffs like that.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:54 No.17118203
    >[ ] Khornette

    She still owes us for the whole killing deal.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:54 No.17118204
    [X] “I honestly can’t decide…”

    My mind isn't melted and are you sure that one of you can melt it sufficiently one your own, and what kind of monster would I be if I separated the three of you from each other?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:54 No.17118209
    {x} Slaneeshi loli
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:54 No.17118212

    [X] Loli

    Just to spite those fuckers from earlier.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:54 No.17118214
    Godamnit, why we can't have the three?
    [ ] “I honestly can’t decide…”
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)19:54 No.17118215
    [X] "I honestly can't decide..."
    Either the best among them steps forth or they all 1) take turns, 2) enjoy us simultaneously.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:55 No.17118216
    [X] Nurglette
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:55 No.17118218

    [x] loli

    >[x] all of them

    Lets keep the hat on, its our swag after all
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:55 No.17118220
    So very much seconded.
    >> Inquistorial Librarian 12/05/11(Mon)19:55 No.17118221
    rolled 5 = 5

    >[X] “I honestly can’t decide…”
    This! This has potential! Imagine it. All of them. Not one, not two, but all three!

    We can do it. We just have to roll hard enough! For ours are the dice that will roll into the Heavens!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:55 No.17118223

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:55 No.17118226
    nurglette gawddamn.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:55 No.17118227
    rolled 2 = 2

    There's enough baddass for all the ladies.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:55 No.17118231
    I feel like we owe it to the loli. We did try to kill her, after all.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:56 No.17118233
    [X] Nurglette
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:56 No.17118235
    rolled 17 = 17

    All of them
    >> Decisions, Decisions... Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:56 No.17118239
    torn between
    [ ] Nurglette
    [ ] Loli
    eh, i can imagine khornette being nothing but pure anger sex/snu-snu... which doesn't sound too pleasent really...
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:56 No.17118240
    that's "drool and mumble incoherently"

    I can't type.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:56 No.17118242

    Actually, changing my vote to 'can't decide'. Or do what this guy >>17118200 said.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:56 No.17118245
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:56 No.17118246
    Can't decide! Choose the best one and make it graphic! I want a "why boner"
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:56 No.17118247
    go to hell
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:57 No.17118256
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:57 No.17118259
         File1323133076.jpg-(25 KB, 294x271, 1317016623868.jpg)
    25 KB
    [ ] “I honestly can’t decide…”

    Get ALL the ladies!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:58 No.17118262
    [ ] “I honestly can’t decide…”
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:58 No.17118267



    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)19:59 No.17118271
    “I just can’t decide, it’s too hard of a choice.” You finally concede.

    The three look at each other, communicating silently again.

    Roll for luck.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:59 No.17118278
    [x] nurglette

    Cuz I'm a nurgle bro
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)19:59 No.17118279
    rolled 11 = 11

    I hate it when we have to roll and then everybody rolls and then a 20 but then a 1.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:59 No.17118281
    I want to say "you choose all!" (be the overlord) ... but this post. I agrees with it.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)19:59 No.17118283
    Can't you just take that one?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:00 No.17118285
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:00 No.17118286

    That gives me an idea. Let's have Max ask his 'little Inquisitor' for admit. Something along the lines of looking down and saying "Your move little guy."
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:00 No.17118288
    rolled 5 = 5

    luck be my lady tonight, plus a daemonette.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:00 No.17118289
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:00 No.17118290
    rolled 12 = 12

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:00 No.17118293
    rolled 16 = 16

    Please just give us a good end. This is too awesome to get fucked over on. Rolling anyway.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:00 No.17118294
    rolled 7 = 7

    Byron blessed!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:00 No.17118301
    rolled 13 = 13

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:00 No.17118304
         File1323133254.jpg-(89 KB, 435x256, 1310423305507.jpg)
    89 KB
    rolled 9 = 9


    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:00 No.17118306
    rolled 16 = 16

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:01 No.17118308
    rolled 17 = 17


    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:01 No.17118311
    I'd say that's okay-ish.
    >in b4 some idiot keeps rolling until he manages to get a nat 1.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:01 No.17118316
    rolled 11 = 11


    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)20:01 No.17118317
    Yeah, everybody stop, we averaged up pretty well.
    Unless you're cheating.
    Then don't get caught.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:01 No.17118319
    Rolled 14= 14
    So we gonna get laid with some heresy or what?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:01 No.17118320
         File1323133316.gif-(950 KB, 476x319, 1298153227999.gif)
    950 KB
    rolled 13 = 13

    The dice gods are fickle.
    >> dice+1d20 Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:02 No.17118322
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:02 No.17118326
    rolled 8 = 8


    Did somebody say nat 1, because I think somebody said nat 1.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:02 No.17118328
    rolled 2 = 2

    Dice, all right
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:02 No.17118332
         File1323133356.jpg-(5 KB, 148x114, tumblr_llh7rdWHez1qdo39wo1_250.jpg)
    5 KB


    May Emprah preserve me and may my lucky boxers do the trick.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:02 No.17118334
    rolled 7 = 7

    I hope this goes well
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:03 No.17118340
    rolled 8 = 8


    Don't you dare
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:03 No.17118341
    rolled 13 = 13

    This isn't going to happen is it...
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:03 No.17118342
    rolled 6, 5 = 11


    Oh wow, apparently I'm thoroughly incompetent. Maybe it's time for some sleep.
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)20:04 No.17118347
    For 2d6, that is damn impressive.
    Rest knowing you did your duty for Max.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:04 No.17118349
    rolled 3 = 3

    The rolls are so mediocre! We need one nat 20! JUST ONE!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:05 No.17118359
    rolled 8 = 8

    rolling for the rolling god
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)20:06 No.17118365
    They finally turn back to you, finished with their silent communiqué.

    “Well, it can’t be helped I guess. You’ll just have to take all three of us.” Khornette says, swirling a finger around on your pants.

    You gulp. While the thought of having not one, but THREE of these girls all up on your junk is exciting, realizing how difficult the task will be to pleasure them all later is daunting.
    The three girls put their underwear back on, making sure you get a nice show of it. The amount of ass and titties in your face is obscene.

    You love it.

    They repair their dresses with a bit of daemonic power and put them back on as well, before finally grabbing you by the arm.

    “Time to party!” The loli shouts.

    “The Emprah’s work is never finished.” You fist pump.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:06 No.17118366
    rolled 11 = 11

    By the Emprah, l beseech thee dice!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:06 No.17118367
    rolled 8 = 8

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:07 No.17118375
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:07 No.17118377
         File1323133637.jpg-(19 KB, 267x274, 1295122034134.jpg)
    19 KB
    rolled 15 = 15


    Oh, god, yes. Papa N, you have my thanks. And all my boners.
    >> Inquistorial Librarian 12/05/11(Mon)20:08 No.17118396
         File1323133713.png-(134 KB, 350x290, Win Award of Excellence.png)
    134 KB
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)20:08 No.17118397
         File1323133718.gif-(397 KB, 400x386, 1322967047863.gif)
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    Conquering the universe for Mankind, one booty call at a time.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:09 No.17118405
    And it will all go to shit in T-5...
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)20:09 No.17118406
    I really need to study some shit for my exam tomorrow and I still have a pile of stats homework to finish before the 9th.

    Plus I kind of want to devote an entire thread to the party.
    >and daemonette threesome

    Not sure when the next thread is going to be either, this week is going to be hell. But after this week I'm on break and want to keep up my average of a thread every 2 days or so.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:09 No.17118409
    we need to construct a chapter of space marines that follows the true path of the emperor: partyin, surfin, and chillin
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:10 No.17118416
         File1323133806.jpg-(53 KB, 500x378, excellent.jpg)
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    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)20:10 No.17118419
    Whatever it takes to keep the quality up, man.
    You have /tg/'s undying respect and admiration for this public service.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:12 No.17118436
         File1323133946.jpg-(83 KB, 853x576, 1296413554049.jpg)
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    rolled 9 = 9


    Good game, Papa N. May you smite your foes and ride upon the shoulders of gods!
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:16 No.17118482
         File1323134197.jpg-(29 KB, 300x300, Big_Lebowski.jpg)
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    Alright man, I'm down.
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)20:19 No.17118519
    >not sticking around for the after-thread

    The Emperor downs another pitcher of his favorite beer as he laughs at Typhus’s Ork joke. That dude is seriously a comedy gold mine.

    “Ah damn, gotta drain the “psycher”, be right back.” He says, slapping Typhus on the back, who turns to tell Slaanesh one about a Tech-priest walking into a bar.

    He stumbles a bit as he makes his way to the little gods room, finally relieving himself.

    “Oh Terrah, that’s better…”

    Suddenly, the lights go out.

    “What in my name?” He mutters, spinning around.

    Tzeentch is standing there in all her glory.

    …Holding her head as she looks at the ground, completely lost on what to do next.

    “Emperor… I…” She stammers.

    He looks at her quizzically.

    “Ohhhh… Screw the plan!” She shouts, throwing herself at him.
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)20:21 No.17118533
    Drawfag! We need a drawfag!
    Is there a drawfag in the house?
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:21 No.17118537
         File1323134490.jpg-(32 KB, 500x421, 294715_291218800904410_1494021(...).jpg)
    32 KB

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:23 No.17118558
    Good. The Emperor needs to get him some too.
    I mean... other then Bolter Bitches.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:23 No.17118571
    'screw the plan'
    the end is nigh
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:24 No.17118584
    hes the chapter master
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)20:27 No.17118610
    "Tzeentch, what are you..." The Emperor stammers, as he looks down at the red-faced chaos goddess.

    "Quiet, you fool! Don't ruin this..." She says, before working to strip off her armor.

    The Emperor is a bit stunned as he takes in the sight.

    "Ugh, this is so hard to remove." Tzeentch grinds her teeth as she pulls at his codpiece.

    >brain: God damn it keep studying
    >boner: no
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)20:30 No.17118649
    "I'ts... Its my first time, so be gentle, ok?" The raven goddess says quietly, face burning.

    Slowly, she lowers her queen of change toward his golden throne...
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:31 No.17118653

    I want link to third archived thread and this one. Now.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:31 No.17118657

    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:32 No.17118666
    search Heretical Love on suptg
    >> Fireman Prime 12/05/11(Mon)20:32 No.17118668
    In reverse chronological order.
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)20:32 No.17118672
    Thread 1 - Sorita: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/17067317/

    Thread 2 - Farseer: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/17073735/

    Thread 3 - Tau: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/17095883/

    keep forgetting to link these in the OP
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:33 No.17118677
    Raven Goddess? Hmm... why is that familiar?
    >> Commissarial Hat !!/1tpKWuVAGC 12/05/11(Mon)20:36 No.17118707
    YES! I caught up in time!

    Love you Papa-N and good luck with your workload.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:44 No.17118781
    So wait, this is still going?
    >> Commissarial Hat !!/1tpKWuVAGC 12/05/11(Mon)20:45 No.17118793
    No, I just missed his last Max post. Oh well.
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/05/11(Mon)20:52 No.17118845
    "So...So good!" Tzeentch yells as she thrusts the Emperor's holy sword into her void of chaos.

    "I feel the warp overtaking me, it is a good feeling!". He shouts as his hands grab her hips.
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)20:54 No.17118881
    >"I feel the warp overtaking me, it is a good feeling!"
    I Knew this phrase was going to happen in these threads
    >> Anonymous 12/05/11(Mon)21:45 No.17119326
    The end?
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/06/11(Tue)00:11 No.17120480
    double heresy time?
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/06/11(Tue)00:23 No.17120619
    Esh watches your antics, knowing exactly what's going on in that Crisis battle suit.

    "Tha-that idiot mon-keigh..." She whimpers, her craft world feeling funny.

    She reaches down and feels it a bit, pleasure rushing through her body at the feeling of her own touch. She can't help herself, fingers creeping down into her undersuit.
    >> Commissarial Hat !!/1tpKWuVAGC 12/06/11(Tue)00:24 No.17120626
    Papa-N you are a god among men!
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/06/11(Tue)00:24 No.17120631
    "Oh... Max...." She moans softly as a finger slips inside her wet psycherpot.

    "Ha...Hah!..." She is on her knees now, and grabs one of her firm breasts. Esh knows this is completely taboo, but she can't stop now, imagining your tongue violating her chastity.
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/06/11(Tue)00:31 No.17120686
    But than imaginary you flips her around so her ass is now I full view.

    "W-wait! You cant lick that spot mon-aaahhhh!"

    Too late, your tongue begins to lick her dark eldar, and she squirms as she tries to hide her pleasure.

    Esh's fingers are moving furiously now, grinding into her most secret places. Her hips are bucking and jumping slightly, and she bites her own arm to mask the obscene moans she cant believe she's making.
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/06/11(Tue)00:39 No.17120777
    "Max! No! I'm... I'm going to...!"

    Esh's hips give out under the overwhelming pleasure and she flattens against the ground. Her fingers slow, now slick with her own juice. She let's out a satisfied sigh.

    "Wah? What did I... What did I just do?" She ponders to herself in between pants.

    "There's no way I like that stupid mon-keigh... It's not even possible...". She finally manages to sit up and make herself decent again.

    "Still... Maybe I should give him a call..." She says quietly, looking down at her communicator.
    >> Papa-N !!94V8GGifJkU 12/06/11(Tue)00:47 No.17120866
    alrighty, Wednesday at 4pmish if I can manage it, if not than sometime after the weekend most likely.
    >> Commissarial Hat !!/1tpKWuVAGC 12/06/11(Tue)00:49 No.17120881
    Dude, Awesome as always, and good luck with your shit. See you then!
    >> Anonymous 12/06/11(Tue)01:37 No.17121325
    Is this on suptg?
    >> Anonymous 12/06/11(Tue)02:28 No.17121671
    Yes, and I made sure it was updated just now.

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