!Q7t.srvWZ6 03/24/12(Sat)19:41 No.18444237|
File: 1332632501.jpg-(34 KB, 485x319, tumblr_la5gbfiIjR1qe3q3vo1_500.jpg)
"Alright, so, any advice?" You ask. "I just told you-" You cut him off, "No, about the whole situation. Thing. Going on." "Right, that." He says, and again there is a lull in the conversation. "Well, normally, I'd just say to try and charm her over, love and hate being so close and all, but given you already have a new girlfriend, that's probably not the best move. Especially since the new one sounds tough. Maybe not like your mother and her goddamn knives (Your maternal grandfather was a hitter for the Russian mob. He taught his little girl how to handle a knife. Your mother is the only lawyer you know who routinely carries a butterfly knife into the courtroom), but still scary." You nod into the phone. "Well, you've been in the shit before, dad, what do you do?" "Run like hell. Good tactic for everything but sharks, boulders and poison dart traps. If that doesn't work, dodge it. Good for everything but sharks and flamethrowers. If all else fails, punch it in the face. Good for everything except things which are not sharks, nazis, mushroom-men, lions or angry bedouin." "You've been a great help, dad." "What do you want, kid? Just punch her in the face when the time comes. Blackstone is right, if she doesn't like you that much, she'll make sure to go out of her way and gloat."