!kyfms5tN66 04/10/12(Tue)05:38 No.18650843|
File: 1334050712.jpg-(85 KB, 500x281, 5711002441_942c2a7141.jpg)
Approximately 2 minutes into a 15-minute drive, the team pulled to a stop behind the P.F. Chang's.
Geppetto stepped out of the car and promptly vomited blood. Not his own, admittedly.
"Wildcard, you drive like an asshole."
Wildcard hiccuped, coming down a little bit from his drunk.
"I AM an asshole."
Dervish, just a little bit green in the cheeks, asked Wildcard and Bend,
"So, you're in charge. What's the plan?"
Bend offered, still quite tipsy,
"I could totally like rob people and shit."
"Good, good. How are you going to rob people?"
"I'm gonna...steal their stuff while they're distracted by you and Wildcard!"
"Better. And you, Wildcard?"
"I'm gonna run through the front door with you, Dervish, and we're gonna point guns at people and tell them to give us their things and we'll jam outgoing calls. And we'll have Geppetto pretend to be a customer, and he'll seed the customers so they'll give us their money faster."
"He's a smart one, Geppetto."
"Bloody right I am," said Wildcard, donning his carnivale mask. "Let's do this shit."
"NOBODY MOVE! EVERYONE ON THE FLOOR!"
Dervish (in a balaclava) and Wildcard swept into the P.F. Changs, knocking over a fake terra cotta soldier to show that they meant business. Geppetto, appearing as a blonde woman with exceptionally large secondary sexual characteristics, swooned and squealed, quasi-patronizingly,
"Oh no! Don't hurt me! Take all my money instead!"
In the back of the restaurant, a lone, big Texan man twitched.