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  • File: 1334269033.jpg-(982 KB, 1440x720, 1333685231641.jpg)
    982 KB Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:17 No.18685046  
    /TG/! DAMAGE REPORT!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:17 No.18685056
    I cannae tell, Cap'n, I'm too fat to reach the controls!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:18 No.18685067
    who's bright idea was to attack a borg cube alone!?!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:19 No.18685070
         File: 1334269147.jpg-(72 KB, 476x356, 1302809479652.jpg)
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    We're cool.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:20 No.18685079
    We're buggered, captain.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:22 No.18685091
    >>18685070
    then why is the starboard cell on fire!?!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:22 No.18685098
    Quick! Someone call Voyager!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:23 No.18685107
    >>18685091
    Are you high? We're in space, there's no oxygen for a fire.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:23 No.18685108
    >>18685098
    HELL NO THAT IS A WORSE FATE!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:23 No.18685111
    Starboard Nacelle offline, and decks 9 through 14 are exposed to hard vacuum.

    Fire containment systems are online, Captain, what are your orders?
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:24 No.18685117
    The shuttle Bay is gone! As in, literately, gone!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:25 No.18685125
    MY LEGS! I CAN'T FEEL MY LEGS! OH GODS MY LEGS!!!!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:25 No.18685127
    Ingore all previous damage reports, all systems nominal. Starboard nacelle is just attention whoring again.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:26 No.18685141
         File: 1334269570.png-(176 KB, 381x396, 1332511384582.png)
    176 KB
    Well, goodluck number One.

    >Escape pod
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:26 No.18685143
    life support got hit cap'n. The second salvo killed everyone who could fix it. Better start praying or fapping, depending on who you believe in
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:26 No.18685145
    >>18685125
    I haven't laugh this hard in a month.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:26 No.18685154
    activate Genesis missile?
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:26 No.18685155
         File: 1334269615.jpg-(421 KB, 996x842, 41b8ea1633f0f24ee6b5674c17c0f8(...).jpg)
    421 KB
    Captain, the Cube is veering away and resuming bombardment on the planet.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:27 No.18685159
    They... they hit our on-ship distillery! Our schnapps are gone! All GONE!!!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:27 No.18685164
    My knee! There's an arrow in my knee!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:28 No.18685177
    >>18685159

    Oh schnapp!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:28 No.18685183
    Medi bay here Captain wever treeating people as best we can but unless engineering can get these fires out we will be forced to evacuate within the next ten Minute's
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:30 No.18685197
         File: 1334269803.gif-(184 KB, 320x240, 8360_961e.gif)
    184 KB
    uuuuuuuuuuus aaaaah.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:30 No.18685199
    >>18685125
    Don't worry, your legs are fine! It's your hands that have been blow off!
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)18:30 No.18685201
    >>18685159

    Correction lad, not ALL the schnapps, take this bottle and get to an escape pod. I'm on my way to the bridge.

    Captain, are you still with us?
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:31 No.18685207
    >>18685183


    I canna doo et Cap'an! She canna hold!!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:31 No.18685208
    Captain, I've learned that when your arm is now only attached to your shoulder by skin. Slapping people by twisting your body is fun.
    oh shit, the Adrenaline is fading.
    JESUS CHRIST THIS FUCKING HURTS. OH LAWD.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:31 No.18685214
         File: 1334269907.gif-(471 KB, 853x608, spanish armada.gif)
    471 KB
    tangos coming in hot
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:32 No.18685216
    I dunno, like, stuff is broken but it's cool cos I'm holding the thing that goes woowooowooowoo quietly at things and shines blue light, so like err, yeah stuff seems to be less on fire than when I started pointing it at the stuff was on fire.

    Anyway, I think I am gonna go take a nap soon so I hope someone can cover for me.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:32 No.18685222
         File: 1334269956.png-(28 KB, 362x450, yotsuba chainsword.png)
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    Captain! We're being hailed!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:32 No.18685224
         File: 1334269968.jpg-(47 KB, 650x496, picard-android.jpg)
    47 KB
    >>18685201
    Nah, Data, Geordi and me are in this giant luxury escape pod.
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)18:33 No.18685232
    >>18685183

    I sent three engineers your way a minute ago, are they there yet?

    >>18685216

    Back on your feet!
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)18:34 No.18685240
    >>18685224

    Godspeed Captain. I will save as many crew as I can from here.
    >> Petty Officer Bob 04/12/12(Thu)18:34 No.18685244
    >>18685232
    Shit, you're an ensign?
    GET THE FUCK AWAY, YOUR KIND IS CURSED.

    CURSSSEEEED
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)18:37 No.18685274
    >>18685244

    Thats bull and you know it! We need to get this ship back together. Contact fire control and keep those torpedoes launchin'

    Does anyone know if the teleporters are still online?
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:38 No.18685289
    Resistance is futile.
    You will be assimilated.

    Lower your shield and power down your weapons
    >> Ediaarc Lac 04/12/12(Thu)18:38 No.18685293
         File: 1334270300.jpg-(133 KB, 900x1061, a4f1b5befb82449c3f68ed8a607468(...).jpg)
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    >>18685244
    >>18685232

    Shit!

    Uh... uhh...

    Quick! Think up an arc or something!

    Uh... I... am... pregnant! And you're the father, Bob. So we're definately getting out of this!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:38 No.18685296
         File: 1334270314.jpg-(19 KB, 480x360, therearefourlights.jpg)
    19 KB
    We keep losing power on a few decks. Having issues keeping track of the lights alone...
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:38 No.18685298
         File: 1334270330.png-(525 KB, 932x776, Telefrag.png)
    525 KB
    teleporters are up but somethings in the way
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)18:39 No.18685302
    >>18685289

    Like hell!

    You can take our ship, and you can take our lives. But you will never take our schnapps!

    All hands. Stand by to repel boarders!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:41 No.18685315
         File: 1334270474.jpg-(185 KB, 700x537, jean-luc-picard-start-trek-jok(...).jpg)
    185 KB
    Meanwhile, in the escape pod.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:42 No.18685322
    >>18685232

    yes they just arrived, Thankyou MacGregor however junior engineer Mihn Seong has suffered extensive plasma burns im treating him the best I can but Im running out of available staff at an alarming rate
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)18:42 No.18685327
    >>18685298

    Activate the automated sentry systems!

    >>18685315

    I hope the captain brings back help in time.

    >>18685143

    How many days of air do we have on cycle?
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:43 No.18685333
    Jesus, the Ensigns are dropping like flies!
    Tim and Charles had crates fall on them.
    I saw 12 Ensigns get vented into space.
    And the panel ensign timmy was working on exploded, knocked him into a power capacitor were he was stuck there, screaming.

    I'm so happy they promoted me to from ensign to Lieutenant Junior Grade last week. I've already cheated death 3 times in this battle.

    God, it took him at least a minute to die.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:43 No.18685334
    Clearly this image has been mirrored, because nothing ever happens to the starboard nacelle.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:44 No.18685343
         File: 1334270645.jpg-(43 KB, 694x530, captain-picard-ooh-girl-n13026(...).jpg)
    43 KB
    >>18685327

    Hm, says here on the internet that semen is good for your skin.
    >> Crewman Silver Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:44 No.18685344
    Ensign! We have another problem! I'm alright now, but I can't seem to open this blast door with my hooks, any help?
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)18:44 No.18685353
    >>18685293

    Excellent, I need somebody to infiltrate the cube's drive systems with an armed torpedo!

    >>18685322

    Keep up the good work! We're all counting on you.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:45 No.18685360
         File: 1334270745.jpg-(22 KB, 520x394, 3797467_f520.jpg)
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    >>18685343
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:46 No.18685369
    >>18685302
    We are Borg
    We will add your distinctions of liquor to our own
    Resistance is futile
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)18:46 No.18685374
    >>18685344

    Do you have a rebreather handy?

    Stand by, I think I can override that deck's doors from the bridge.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:46 No.18685375
         File: 1334270816.jpg-(7 KB, 150x150, cmon-get-happy-picard-150x150.jpg)
    7 KB
    >>18685360
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)18:48 No.18685388
    >>18685369

    I'm sorry, you'll have to speak up. I think the voice module on this unit is busted. You know, from all the phasering I gave it.
    >> Crewman Fodder 04/12/12(Thu)18:49 No.18685410
         File: 1334270999.jpg-(9 KB, 266x121, IndependenceDay60.jpg)
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    >>18685353
    Did somebody call for a suicide mission?!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:50 No.18685420
         File: 1334271042.gif-(139 KB, 300x236, applausetrekTNG.gif)
    139 KB
    No one told me there was an open bar on this escape pod! Hey guys?! Guess look what I found.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:51 No.18685423
         File: 1334271066.jpg-(31 KB, 800x600, necronfleet.jpg)
    31 KB
    cap'n! Something else just arrived in the system.
    And its fucking up the cube!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:51 No.18685426
         File: 1334271077.jpg-(11 KB, 480x360, 0.jpg)
    11 KB
    >>18685375
    Sir, I believe we have more urgent matters to attend to than moistening issues.
    For instance, the Enterprise is still on fire.
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)18:53 No.18685447
    >>18685410

    Crewman Fodder! I need you to head belowdecks and meet up with Crewman Silver. He should be able to show you to torpedo storage. Once there, page me, and I'll show you how to take down a Borg Cube.

    >>18685298

    Anyone else near the teleporters? Clear any borg that may be sapping them.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:53 No.18685450
         File: 1334271208.jpg-(12 KB, 406x310, picard.jpg)
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    >>18685426
    Fuck that, didn't you see >>18685420 bringing in the liquor, you chunk of junk?
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:54 No.18685468
         File: 1334271290.jpg-(77 KB, 600x750, Bigassship.jpg)
    77 KB
    Don't worry. We'll take care of the Borg.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:54 No.18685469
         File: 1334271294.jpg-(39 KB, 400x300, barrles.jpg)
    39 KB
    FIRE?!
    SAVE MY BOOZE
    >> Crewman Fodder 04/12/12(Thu)18:55 No.18685478
         File: 1334271356.jpg-(33 KB, 200x200, Russell-Casse-independence-day(...).jpg)
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    >>18685447
    YES SIR!!
    *Man, I hope my booze made it to the escape pod in time*
    >> Crewman Silver 04/12/12(Thu)18:56 No.18685481
    Ensign! I keep trying to launch torpedoes, but I keep pressing several buttons at once! Permission to type with my tongue sir!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:57 No.18685491
    How are you gentlemen !!
    All your base are belong to us.
    You are on the way to destruction.
    You have no chance to survive make your time.
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)18:57 No.18685498
    >>18685344

    Crewman Silver! Did the doors open up for you? Also can you breathe?

    I'm sending you some help, guide him to the torpedo bays.

    >://Engineering

    Can we get any kind of warp at all? This is going to be a pretty big explosion.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:59 No.18685513
    >this thread

    I haven't laughed for so long that my face hurts after reading this
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:59 No.18685514
         File: 1334271547.jpg-(13 KB, 250x305, 250px-GeordiLaForge.jpg)
    13 KB
    Shields failing, multiple hull breaches... Sir, if we detonate the drive core, we may be able to destroy the Borg Cube.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:59 No.18685517
         File: 1334271574.jpg-(70 KB, 1366x768, Crimson Permanent Assurance.jpg)
    70 KB
    Off the starboard bow! Its Crimson Permanent Assurance!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)18:59 No.18685523
         File: 1334271598.jpg-(78 KB, 694x530, Jean-Luc_Picard,_2370.jpg)
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    >>18685514

    That will mean destroying the ship...
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)19:00 No.18685526
    >>18685481

    Permission Granted! You tongue that console like a Brea III hooker!

    >>18685491

    Negatory. You have yet to hear the thunder of our victory cadence!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:00 No.18685529
    >>18685523

    We need to blow up the Enterprise!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:00 No.18685531
         File: 1334271635.jpg-(62 KB, 694x530, notmuch.jpg)
    62 KB
    >>18685514
    That's just the Enterprise, silly nigger.
    We're in the pod. Now pour me a Shirley Temple, boy.
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)19:00 No.18685532
    >>18685523

    If we just hold it together, I know the captain will return with help. He'd never self destruct with crew onboard.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:01 No.18685538
    You broke the ship..... YOU BROKE THE BLOODY SHIP!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:01 No.18685540
         File: 1334271702.jpg-(10 KB, 163x242, LAFORGE.jpg)
    10 KB
    >>18685531
    WHAT did you call me?
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:01 No.18685542
    >>18685523

    BLOW UP THE DAMN SHIP, PICARD!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:02 No.18685549
         File: 1334271749.gif-(825 KB, 320x136, 2203499_o.gif)
    825 KB
    >>18685542

    NO!

    NOOOOOO!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:03 No.18685552
         File: 1334271789.jpg-(15 KB, 320x240, 2473481c0d0b7992a6b1aa9e27c2ce(...).jpg)
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    >>18685540
    Shut the fuck up.

    Where's the brig? We need to lock this one up.
    What? No brig? Fuck. Back to the Enterprise.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:03 No.18685553
         File: 1334271797.jpg-(14 KB, 400x305, wesley-crusher.jpg)
    14 KB
    Don't worry Captain. I fixed everything.
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)19:04 No.18685568
    >://Teleporters

    Does anyone read me? Please somebody respond. I need you to lock on to Fodder and Silver, and wait for my signal!

    >>18685369

    Okay, we've reconsidered. We're ready to lower our shields now.
    >> Crewman Fodder 04/12/12(Thu)19:05 No.18685571
         File: 1334271913.jpg-(5 KB, 150x120, rush-id4-casse.jpg)
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    >>18685532
    Sir, I think I'm a little lost, I'm not use to navigating this ship sober. Hold on, there's a guy making out with a console, maybe he can help me out.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:05 No.18685578
         File: 1334271944.jpg-(60 KB, 694x401, picard glasses.jpg)
    60 KB
    >>18685552
    Captain's Log.

    We came back to the Enterprise, fucked up the Borg, the Necrons, Bert, some lights, and some ensigns for good measure.
    We locked up LaForge.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:05 No.18685580
         File: 1334271949.jpg-(129 KB, 426x640, 6758710795_59f20a55b3_z.jpg)
    129 KB
    >>18685538
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:06 No.18685588
    >>18685553
    Did you fix your smug, self-important attitude? No?
    Then shut up Wesley.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:06 No.18685589
         File: 1334271976.jpg-(50 KB, 250x191, warpfactorfuckyou.jpg)
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    >>18685553
    Shut up Wesly.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:06 No.18685594
         File: 1334271995.jpg-(14 KB, 350x280, Adm Janeway.jpg)
    14 KB
    Enterprise you seem to be having some trouble.
    I could send a few ships your way, provided you're prepared to part with some of your best Brandy.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:06 No.18685595
         File: 1334271996.jpg-(25 KB, 443x259, patstew.jpg)
    25 KB
    >>18685578
    AND I BECAME THE KING OF ENGLAND!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:07 No.18685604
         File: 1334272044.jpg-(12 KB, 325x396, Wesley_Crusher,_cadet.jpg)
    12 KB
    >>18685588
    Thats the one thing I can't fix
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)19:07 No.18685607
    >>18685571

    Excellent! Any moment now the transportation officers should be ready to teleport you directly to your mission.

    Any crew nearby Fodder and Silver please attend and provide guard detail.
    >> Crewman Silver 04/12/12(Thu)19:07 No.18685611
    >>18685568
    It's ok Ensign! I nearly suffocated myself, but I managed to type out the launch code for the photon torpedoes with my tongue, only taking short breaks to breathe so that my session wouldn't time out! shall I fire? Only, the code expired in 2 minutes and I don't know if I've got it in me to type it out again!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:09 No.18685631
         File: 1334272149.jpg-(253 KB, 1280x960, StarTrekEnterpise1701D_destroy(...).jpg)
    253 KB
    fuck you ensign.
    Fuck you
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)19:09 No.18685638
    >>18685611

    Excellent work, we must have knocked out whatever weapon systems were facing us because we're still alive. You've done this ship a tremendous service!

    Cease fire and attend Fodder. Tell me when you've arrived at torpedo storage. Also arm one manually and keep your hand pressed against its casing.
    >> Crewman Silver 04/12/12(Thu)19:11 No.18685662
    >>18685638
    But Ensign! I lost my hands earlier in the battle!
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)19:12 No.18685687
    >>18685662

    Okay. Then instruct Fodder how to do it. Be careful not to blow up the ship.

    >://Teleporters

    Is anybody operating the teleporters? Anybody at all? Please respond!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:14 No.18685711
    >>18685687

    I believe the staff...teleported. Away.

    A while ago.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:14 No.18685712
    >>18685687
    No one. the fool teleported himself over to /x/
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:15 No.18685716
         File: 1334272512.png-(289 KB, 474x315, HANDS.png)
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    >18685662
    I find your lack of hands disturbing
    >> Crewman Fodder 04/12/12(Thu)19:16 No.18685728
         File: 1334272564.jpg-(35 KB, 320x240, 14163-22068.jpg)
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    >>18685662
    >>18685687
    You heard the Ensign, let's get to the torpedo room. You gotta stop sweating the small stuff, Silver. I mean look at me! I'm colorblind and have no liver, but I still manage to pay my alimony checks every month.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:16 No.18685733
         File: 1334272594.jpg-(51 KB, 430x700, troihot.jpg)
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    Captain, there's a place for me in the lifeboat?
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)19:16 No.18685738
    >>18685711

    All right, I'm locking down the bridge and heading to the Teleporters myself then.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:17 No.18685746
         File: 1334272650.jpg-(67 KB, 500x375, Wearesurrounded.jpg)
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    Sir... there's something on the monitor...
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:17 No.18685752
    >18685687
    We keep sending people through the teleporters, but we lose contact with them on the other side
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:20 No.18685775
         File: 1334272816.png-(203 KB, 300x543, heavy backstab.png)
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    >18685752
    is that asshole still there?
    Send some firebats through the teleporters
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:20 No.18685776
         File: 1334272816.jpg-(83 KB, 480x300, IHunger.jpg)
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    >>18685752

    Not my fault you piced all the delicious, delicious redshirts...
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:22 No.18685807
    >18685776
    OH GOD GET THE SPACE MARINES
    we're going to need a bigger person
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:23 No.18685830
         File: 1334273006.jpg-(43 KB, 492x480, SCvs40k.jpg)
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    >>18685807
    The space marines are dealing with other... problems... right now.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:26 No.18685865
         File: 1334273176.png-(33 KB, 510x546, Alpha Legion.png)
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    >>18685807
    >>18685830
    "I assure you, my lord, that not all the space marines are... indisposed. We can be there in fifteen minutes."
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)19:27 No.18685881
    >>18685728
    >>18685662

    I've reached the teleporters, and I've managed to stop the bleeding.

    Getting kind of... sleepy guys, are you ready or not?
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:29 No.18685897
         File: 1334273353.gif-(894 KB, 178x100, weepingangel.gif)
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    Someone left a statue on the escape pod. How quaint. Now ignore this dumb thing and look at all that glorious booze.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:29 No.18685898
         File: 1334273370.jpg-(82 KB, 1186x484, Space Gear.jpg)
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    >>18685881
    FOR GODS SAKE GET US OUT OF HERE!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:32 No.18685936
         File: 1334273579.png-(245 KB, 497x372, ex.png)
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    This is USS Excalibur.
    Do you require any assistance? we heard some dumbass decided to take on a Borg cube by himself.
    >> Crewman Fodder 04/12/12(Thu)19:34 No.18685955
         File: 1334273643.jpg-(30 KB, 852x480, 996IDY_Randy_Quaid_005.jpg)
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    >>18685881
    Torpedo's armed and ready, sir. Let's show these tin cans why they don't mess with the Enterprise.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:34 No.18685957
    >>18685936
    >USS
    >Excalibur
    >Not HMS

    U W0T M8
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)19:36 No.18685984
         File: 1334273772.jpg-(42 KB, 400x288, borgcubeexploding.jpg)
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    >>18685881

    Fodder, Silver... Prepare to be energized. Remember the armed torpedo.

    >://Borg

    We've lowered our shields and are prepared to be boarded.

    >://Teleporters

    ~Energize!~

    >://Engineering

    TAKE US TO WARP!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:38 No.18686011
         File: 1334273902.png-(206 KB, 497x372, ex2.png)
    206 KB
    >>18685957
    well fuck you guys then. we even had a welcome party ready. Now you can all go rot.
    Number one. take us to a safe distance where we can watch them explode but if they pull their heads out of their asses we can help them
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)19:43 No.18686064
    >>18686011

    Excalibur, please disregard my panicking crew.

    Can you confirm the cube's destruction? I have zero sensors.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:43 No.18686065
         File: 1334274199.png-(28 KB, 510x546, Hubris.png)
    28 KB
    Well nobody answered our hails, so we let ourselves in... thank you kindly for the great many gifts, by the way.
    >> Crewman Fodder 04/12/12(Thu)19:45 No.18686085
         File: 1334274312.png-(55 KB, 320x240, independence_day.png)
    55 KB
    >>18685984
    Ha-ha-ha! Hello, boys! I'm here!
    *Man, it is taking the ensign forever to beam us ba-*
    >Explosion
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:45 No.18686092
    >>18686064
    Very well.
    Initial scans show the cube to be royally buggered.
    How many survivors have you got?
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)19:46 No.18686099
    >>18686065

    What? Who are you?! And what are you doing with those teleporter pads?!

    >>18686085

    Oh no...
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)19:48 No.18686121
    >>18686092

    Um... Let me check... One second Excalibur.

    >://Engineering

    Check in.

    >://Medical

    Check in.

    >://Hangar

    All wings, check in.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:49 No.18686141
         File: 1334274570.gif-(496 KB, 500x388, LetMeOutLetMeOutLetMeOut.gif)
    496 KB
    Oh gods... we're trapped... trapped...
    >sobs gently.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:50 No.18686162
         File: 1334274644.jpg-(1.38 MB, 2048x1536, 40k Ship.jpg)
    1.38 MB
    >>18686121
    The Emperor's Solemn Vow, Checking in.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:51 No.18686169
         File: 1334274677.png-(183 KB, 485x312, ex3.png)
    183 KB
    >>18686121
    >>18686141
    Zarquon that sounds bad... Listen if its alright with you I'm going to start beaming out people as I lock on to them. don't be surprised if people start randomly disappearing.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:53 No.18686193
         File: 1334274792.jpg-(32 KB, 600x400, IHaveNoFace.jpg)
    32 KB
    >>18686169
    "Right... it's the teleporters making people disappear.. not the slenderman..."
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:53 No.18686200
         File: 1334274829.jpg-(28 KB, 399x300, red six.jpg)
    28 KB
    >>18686121
    This is red six, standing by.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:55 No.18686224
         File: 1334274936.gif-(1.22 MB, 540x360, Poosh ALL da buttons.gif)
    1.22 MB
    >>18686121
    "This is... uhh... "The Post-Dated-Check-Loan" Yeah, I think that's our call sign... and... fuck, I have no idea what I'm doing, there's a level 3 biohazard outbreak here..."
    >> Ensign MacGregor 04/12/12(Thu)19:55 No.18686229
    >>18686169

    Yes please... Start with Medical.

    Take good care of the crew...

    >://All Decks

    Congratulations Crew. We survived our encounter with the borg. Be prepared for immediate teleportation, the Excalibur is rescuing us.

    >I guess I didn't stop the bleeding after all... Oh well...

    Ensign MacGregor, out.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)19:55 No.18686231
         File: 1334274957.png-(208 KB, 497x372, ex4.png)
    208 KB
    >>18686193
    ...I'm gonna need you to clarify...did you say the Slenderman is aboard your vessel?
    >> Dowjin !!9I4SJG4jQPb 04/12/12(Thu)19:56 No.18686244
         File: 1334275010.jpg-(7 KB, 182x246, 1328304444520.jpg)
    7 KB
    >>18686200

    I was wondering if anyone would bite.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:00 No.18686288
    >>18686229
    Please clarify. Is the entity known as slenderman aboard your vessel?
    >> Dowjin !!9I4SJG4jQPb 04/12/12(Thu)20:01 No.18686296
    >>18686288

    He's dead, Jim.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:01 No.18686309
    >>18686231
    Yee though I walk through the valley of Slenderman. My god emperor protects
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:02 No.18686317
    >>18686288
    N̸̸̨̜̹̤̬̥͈̠̙̗͒͋͐̄͛̍̔ͪ͊̑ͧ͂̋͜ͅǫ̥̱̩̠̖͕̙̞̰̦̑̌ͭ͂͜͝͡ͅp̛̜͉
    ̳̟̝̜̫͉̹̗ͤͯ̓̇͛̾̐̉̍̔͜ȩ̟̺͓͎̫̗̲͇̯̹͙̮͈͕̹̩̥ͮ̈̇͌͒̕͟͡͡
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:02 No.18686322
         File: 1334275378.jpg-(70 KB, 521x720, inside_the_house.jpg)
    70 KB
    >>18686231
    >>18686288
    >>18686309
    ...

    No.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:04 No.18686335
         File: 1334275448.png-(205 KB, 497x372, exohshit.png)
    205 KB
    >>18686296
    My god.
    I cannot risk my crew and their well being if there is even the slightest possibility that we can kill the slenderman. we will take it. Please. I beg you clarify. IS THE ENTITY ON YOUR SHIP?!
    >> Redshirt Bigsby 04/12/12(Thu)20:05 No.18686351
    >>18686335
    yes oh god they are everywhere ruuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnn %zzzt% cuts out
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:05 No.18686368
         File: 1334275551.jpg-(151 KB, 699x792, right_outside_your_window.jpg)
    151 KB
    >>18686335

    No.

    LeT uSSIN
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:07 No.18686387
         File: 1334275641.jpg-(6 KB, 300x250, pew pew.jpg)
    6 KB
    >>18686322
    >>18686317
    ...Mother forgive me.
    Lock phasers and Photon torpedoes. Destroy that ship.
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:09 No.18686414
         File: 1334275784.png-(460 KB, 490x493, explosion.png)
    460 KB
    >>18686387
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:10 No.18686425
    wrong ship
    >> Dowjin !!9I4SJG4jQPb 04/12/12(Thu)20:11 No.18686436
         File: 1334275887.jpg-(16 KB, 300x335, 13zt6v.jpg)
    16 KB
    >>18686387
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:12 No.18686451
    >>18686387
    >>18686436
    Ý̵̈́̿̒̊́͒̚҉͍̜͉̲̣̫̹o̻̩ͯͣ̈̒͆͋͗̍u͚̱̟ͯ̽̊ͦ͡͠ ̰̤͎͚̯͇̣̦́̌̄ͬ̌̀̀̚͜c̶͖̰̪͇̬͒ͬ͝͞a̺̯̦̻͉̞̖̟̿̈́́͘ṋ̢̘̮͈͙̱̌̑
    ̀̏̍͊͛ͬ'̴̨̃̔̾҉̦͍̦̗̼̘̞t̯̠̺̊̓ͩͦ̔ ͊͂͝҉͔͎̖͕̠͠k̼̭͍̗̈́̓̅͘͜i̴̋̾̈̎̓̀ͣ̈́ͧ͢҉͓͍l̵̲͓̮̩̘͕͈ͬ̒͝͡l͉
    ̼̺̳ͯ͂̿̔ͅ ̧̧̺̑̈́̅͞ú̡̲̹̰̺̳̜̦͎͔ͯ͛̈͘s̸̨͚͔͉̯̲̹͉͓ͨ̐͠.̸̡͋ͤ̀̃ͥ̚̚͏̮̦
    ̨̱̦̅ͧ̑͡
    ̡͎̗̞̹̰͕̦͐̎̇̀W̷̶̩͔̟̮̬̺͚ͪ͊̑̿ͧͣ̅ė̦̳̃ͭ́ͫ̿͆͝ ͕̥ͩ͋͛̈́ͫͅḳ̻̥̝̼̘̿̽͊̎̿͌̚̕͞ń̶̩̼̦͈̯ͫ̆͑̀̄͘o̝͕̘̪̪̹͕̳ͬ̍́w̴
    ͇̅ͯ̍̐ ̶̼̞͔̝̪̮̙͂̐͗ͯ͊ẏ̹͔̩̼͗ͣ̏ͣ͢͢ͅo̧̪̘͒ͨ̒͒̔̒ͣͤ͟͢ủ̟̳̝͛̋̃́ ̴̨̳͇̏͑̀̈́̀͋n̶͍̘̻͓͎̜͔̼͓̂ͯ̓̌̽̏͛o̷͉̥͈̥̼͋ͨ͊̉̌̑̄ͪ͗͟͞w̧̖̪ͬ
    ͗͆̊ͬͤ͡.͂ͬ͌̈́̄ͥͣ͑ͮ̀҉͇̼̝
    ̯̬̘̤̯̩̻̔ͪ̎͘͝
    ̸̢̥̪̞̞̘̦͈ͮ̍͌̈́̂ͬ͑ͫW̡̡̗̺̪̱͔̅̔̌̊̊ͣ̂ͭͯe̶̵͎̜̙̿ͅ ̢̝̘̹̎̃̿̅̈̍w̧͉̳͚̹̆̿̋̒͊̍̀͢i̧̠͚͎̬̱͋ͫ̏̑lͫ̏ͫ͆̎̄́͒҉҉͔̤̬̳l̫
    ̤͈̘͕͙ͭ̑̒͐ͥ̊̄͞ ̤͕̘ͬ̿̍f̲͓̺̳̫̝̺̆̈̓̄́͜ͅi͔͇͓̜̠ͮͯ͂ͬ̎̕͢ͅn̟͓̝̖͙̰̝̾ͧͨ́ͮ̚͠ͅd
    ͭͭ͊ͭ̌ͫ͂͝͏̛͙̦̯̺̤͇ ̧͕̺̝͖̺͎͚̙̿̃ͪͥ̃̽ͨy̷̶͍̰̮͚̝̻͕͂ͥ͗ͤo̡̠̹ͧ̈́̈͛̓͆ͨ͋ư̙͈̗̫̌ͨ͒
    ̓͗ͅ.ͯͤ͆́̃̒̚͏̸̭͍̻̩͍̦
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:15 No.18686491
         File: 1334276118.gif-(954 KB, 356x200, rainbowsmash.gif)
    954 KB
    >>18686414

    Meanwhile, on a nearby planet, a warp core from the destroyed ship falls...
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:15 No.18686500
         File: 1334276151.jpg-(86 KB, 483x700, Zohar.jpg)
    86 KB
    >>18686451
    Sir! I think the aliens want to send a representative over for peace talks!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:16 No.18686518
         File: 1334276218.gif-(55 KB, 320x240, 109939.gif)
    55 KB
    STILL KING!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:17 No.18686520
    >>18686451
    ...Clearly I have only one option.
    This is Captain Marsh. Authorisation Alpha one. initiate self destruct sequence. five second countdown. Engage. Its been an honor.
    .
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:17 No.18686530
    1...2...
    Countdowns are too mainstream
    *boom*
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:18 No.18686536
         File: 1334276287.gif-(760 KB, 320x137, ZigZagKnowsCardTricks.gif)
    760 KB
    >>18686518
    And I'm his grand vizier!
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:19 No.18686564
         File: 1334276376.png-(534 KB, 526x387, explosion 2.png)
    534 KB
    >>18686530
    >>18686520
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:21 No.18686591
         File: 1334276491.jpg-(28 KB, 480x360, The End.jpg)
    28 KB
    >>18686564
    >> Dowjin !!9I4SJG4jQPb 04/12/12(Thu)20:22 No.18686603
    >>18686591

    Roll Credits
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:23 No.18686614
         File: 1334276603.gif-(486 KB, 500x333, This Picture Is Rated X.gif)
    486 KB
    well... i'd call that a good disaster. So what's the B-movie?
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:23 No.18686617
    >>18686591
    >>18686603
    W̴̡̢̱̮̠̖̱͔̠̖̟̲̻̣͚͈̼̃̌̍͗̓̒ͦͫͧͮ̈́̈ͦ̾̄ͨ͢͟ͅĖ̇ͪͮ̍̔̊ͫ͏̴͙̜
    ̯̩̻̗̞͚̫ ̠̹̜̖̳̻͍̼͐͌ͣͦ͘̕͠S̵ͨ͐̽̀͊̌ͪ̔ͫͤ̄̔͂͛̄̾̆̓̚͏̦͍͔̟̥̗̺͓͙͔̖̥Ę̡
    ͔̣̳̘̯̦̥̼̫̗̤̼̦͙̻̬̹̑̃ͫͮͬ͂̄Ë͊̉͂ͭ͏̴̵̜̦̺͈̼̥̹̰͔̩̳͕̬̕ ̸̡͉̰̳̝̲̘̖͈͙̱͓̠͍̥̞̪̆͆ͦ̉͌ͧ̀͝ͅͅY͐͗͗ͬ͗ͮͬ͗̔͑́̄̏̏̾͋̿̅̚҉̸̤
    ̰͉O̵̧͙̹̻̻̦͖̾̏͒̒̾̎͛͗͆̾̆͂̔ͤ̌͠Ư̵̝̙͈̙̥̠̘͛̉̏ͯ͐ͧ̚̚͜͝ͅ
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:25 No.18686652
    >>18686614
    Sisko and Janeway team up to fight the Space Jockeys
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:27 No.18686685
    >>18686614
    Wesley getting launched into a star?
    Repeatedly?
    For two hours?
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)20:27 No.18686689
         File: 1334276856.gif-(491 KB, 500x261, CrazyIvan.gif)
    491 KB
    >>18686652

    >Opening scene Sisko and Janeway are in the persued vehicle...
    >> Anonymous 04/12/12(Thu)21:21 No.18687449
         File: 1334280104.jpg-(37 KB, 256x363, Star_Trek_Online_cover.jpg)
    37 KB
    > /TG/! DAMAGE REPORT!

    It's bad, captain. We've got reports of shitty away mission content on all decks, and we're venting pay to win content!



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