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  • File: 1335830840.jpg-(159 KB, 750x600, Ohgodthisbitch..jpg)
    159 KB Tank witches: Tread IV - Always with the breast tank puns Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)20:07 No.18926151  
    It's been too long since you fought a good fight. It has been what, almost three years since Dunkirk? Operation Michael, the last German push in the great war was twenty-five years ago? Memories of the great war return in a giant wave, pushing the present from your mind.

    Back in 1916, you remember using those primitive tank strikers, with the hip mounted 6pounders and the .303 Lewis LMGs. God what a pain those were in the french mud during the war. There were times when the mud was at least 3 feet deep! At least you fared far better then the poor bloody infantry who supported you, hell, couldn't have been much better for Jerry. One time you remember, you ran out of ammo for all your firearms, but instead of retreating, you fought them with nothing more then 6 tons of magical powered steel and blade. You still cringe when you hear balloons popping, brings back too many skull fracturing memories....

    You get dragged back into the peasant as you hear a thunderous roar from some asshole witch passing above you not twenty feet away. Aw fuck please don't let it be her! Anybody but her! You catch a glimpse of a red striker and long blonde hair.... Fuck.

    As you prepare to curse her name, you see British home-guard units crawl all over the wrecked martian armour. They open up hatches n poke at the insides with their WARPIKES, making sure the xeno scum is completely dead....

    >What do?
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)20:09 No.18926176
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)20:10 No.18926195
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)20:11 No.18926207
    Peasant? I am guessing you mean present, dyslexic typists gotta stay together
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)20:11 No.18926210
    Check for bandits, check our ammo load, then

    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)20:12 No.18926222
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)20:19 No.18926297
    Check for hostiles, if there are any left or fleeing chase them down like the dogs they are. If we're cool find our husband and give him a kiss, just like old times.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)20:20 No.18926308
    >Who is this planewitch again?
    >> Fritz the somali pirate 04/30/12(Mon)20:28 No.18926374
    Secure the area.
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)20:35 No.18926460
    Bitch at the bitch that flew over head. Fucking fly girls.
    Take stock of the situation. Any aliums needing killing?
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)20:38 No.18926480
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    Some of the infantry you engaged last time have broken off, but the home guard is currently taking care of that
    Try as you might, you cannot remember her actual name, but her nickname from the last war was the Red Baroness, the sister to the Red Baron. You have fought her once or twice before, but why she is in England is anybodies guess. As long as she leaves you the fuck alone....

    Seeing as the situation is well in hand, you go looking for your husband. As you turn to head back into town. Captain Barkmann whispers into the radio.

    "Permission to preform some field reconnaissance? I don't want to be caught unawares again."

    "Go ahead, I'm going back to check in with headquarters"

    With little more then a nod, she goes from 0 to 60, leaps over the low wall she was taking cover behind, and sprints across the field with her rifle on her back.

    Several buildings have fared poorly against the surprise onslaught, all from crashing enemy craft. You dismount but keep your sidearm drawn as you leave the motor pool. Suddenly, someone or something wraps two appendages around you, squeezes you, and lifts you slightly in the air...

    >It's just like one of my Japanese animes!
    >Mystery box?
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)20:39 No.18926491
    >it's just like one of my chink animations
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)20:39 No.18926493
    >mystery box
    we spit motor oil
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)20:40 No.18926500
    Sorry for being LIGHTNING FAST!, Cat is being a terrorist tonight, don't know why. Fucker caught a rabit and think he is king of the castle
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)20:41 No.18926509
    >It's just like one of my Japanese animes!
    More than likely it's our husband. Maybe. Hopefully.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)20:43 No.18926527
    Turn our head around a bit and give our husband a kiss, if it's not him then prepare to fill them with lead.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)20:43 No.18926529

    Your cat thinks you can't hunt. He's bringing food home TO SHOW YOU HOW IT'S DONE.

    >> Fritz the somali pirate 04/30/12(Mon)20:43 No.18926533
    >It's just like one of my Japanese animes!
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)20:46 No.18926568
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    It will taste hot lead today, from the barrel of our cannon. DIE MONSTER
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)20:48 No.18926596
    >It's just like one of my Japanese animes!
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)20:49 No.18926607
    The same thing has happened to me, well to be more specific two similar things have happened to me in the last week.

    One of my cats brought in a dead rabbit and left it very proudly on the floor, he was very happy about it. The second event was the same cat bringing in a live rabbit, dropping it happily and letting it run and hide behind stuff. Even after I poked it out of it's hiding place he just sat there as the rabbit ran past him and jumped against a closed door and squeaked. Eventually I got the rabbit out of the house, but it would have been so much easier if he had JUST FUCKING KILLED IT.
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)20:54 No.18926680
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    Panzer, I fear for your life...
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:00 No.18926761
    My cat does all of these things. I feel unsafe.

    I vote MYSTERY BOX. Because how could you expect me not to? IT'S A BOX OF MYSTERY.
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)21:04 No.18926818
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    Preparing for the worst, you try to cock the hammer on your gun while you are flailing about.....It doesn't work as you hoped. Thankfully, as you look down past your lovely frontal armor, you see two human arms wrapped around your midsection.

    "Do you know what time it is?" A familiar voice hisses in your ear.

    "If you wanted to have sex on a tank all you had to do was..URK" The arms constrict you, then drop you on the ground. You turn around to try to get some more words in, but all you get is a surprise kiss from a Victor Kent.

    Almost a minute passes by before you part lips from that handsome bastard of a husband.

    "Oh Kath! I am so glad you are alright! I don't know what I would have done if anything happened to the best breasts of the British Isles!" You shoot him a look that would scare 2/3rds of the mustache back onto Hitler's corpse. " I KID I KID! OH GOD YOU GOT A GUN! PLEASE DON'T SHOOT ME!" he pleads as he gets down on his knees.

    "Don't get cute with me love... Why are you even here? I thought 2nd Company was on the other side of the Isle waiting for new panzers from Germany?"

    "About that... I got assigned as 1st Battalion's commanding officer, meaning I finally wear the pants in the relationshi....Uh, I mean we jointly command the 1st Bat!"

    You sigh, hopefully this day will get better.

    >Who was that Airbitch I mean witch?
    >OH GOD WHAT THE FUCK IS OUR OOB?(Order of battle)
    >I am feeling uncreative, tell me what the fuck you want to do
    (Couldn't find any good images)
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:06 No.18926844
    >So what's our OOB?

    Please tell me it's based on who manages to get top position in the bunk on a night-by-night basis
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:07 No.18926861
    >OH GOD WHAT THE FUCK IS OUR OOB?(Order of battle)
    We need to figure out orders
    No need running around with our heads cut off
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:07 No.18926863
    [x] this
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)21:08 No.18926871
    OOB, now.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:09 No.18926884
    OH GOD WHAT THE FUCK IS OUR OOB?(Order of battle)

    Also, we are going to make this squadron into the most effective joint unit possible. We're a prime example of men and witches getting along and if there are problems between the two groups we can smooth them out, in bed.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:09 No.18926887


    settle it by wrestling him to the ground and forcing him to yell uncle.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:10 No.18926889
    >OH GOD WHAT THE FUCK IS OUR OOB?(Order of battle)
    We might have beat back the initial probing attack, but there's still an invasion on. We can act like the loving couple we are, later.
    When we ambush Vicky and tell him he's been a naughty boy.

    But first, duty.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:10 No.18926898
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:10 No.18926899
    >OH GOD WHAT THE FUCK IS OUR OOB?(Order of battle)

    "So what happens when we give conflicting orders in combat?"
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:11 No.18926902
    Yeah, we can smooth out the witches, he can smooth out the men.
    In bed.
    >> Fritz the somali pirate 04/30/12(Mon)21:13 No.18926927
    >OH GOD WHAT THE FUCK IS OUR OOB?(Order of battle)
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)21:16 No.18926967
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    Well, the confusing Order of Battle of the 101st Panzerhexe Lehr is as follows
    Divisional command< Major-General Sir Percy Hobart
    >1st Battalion < Victor Kent
    >1st Company <You
    >2nd Company - Armored Company ( 26~ Tanks)
    >3rd Company - Mechinised Infantry Company (300~ Men)
    >4th Company - Mechinised Infantry Again
    >5th Company - Self-Propelled Assets like AA, and artillery n some engineers

    >2nd Battalion > Same as first
    >3rd Battalion >Same as first
    >4th Battalion >Mostly armor
    >5th Battalion >More Infantry

    TDLR, since you wear the pants(u), you command pretty much the entirety of the first Battalion (Unofficially, you still have to ask your husbandu nicely)

    >What now?
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)21:18 No.18926984
    Mech Infantry into the fight. Back up with our witches. We need to clear any squiddies that managed to land out of their hidey holes.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:18 No.18926985
    But in all seriousness, we need to find a way to support.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:20 No.18927005
    Seriously though, where's 2nd Company? Still on the other side of England?

    And what about 3rd and 4th Companies? We're going to want Victor to get their Company Commanders organized and sweeping the area for any squid pockets of resistance.
    Then we have to get in contact with 1st Company and see what's going on back home.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:24 No.18927052
    When your cat brings you a dead rabbit, respect your cat. He put meat on the table. That's a sizable meal for you, and days worth of food for a cat.

    When your cat brings you a live rabbit, it's his way of saying you need to practice your hunting skills because he's tired of supporting you.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:24 No.18927057
    Now, let's sweep the area for HOSTILES.

    And perhaps something else.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:25 No.18927075
    Ok, so we can command the other Companies in the Battalion to do stuff as we have joint command of it, though we'll probably leave a lot of that to our husband and focus our efforts on our own company.

    We should probably have a joint meeting of the officers of the companies with us and our husband in charge to get a feel for how they work together and to stomp out any disagreements early.

    For now get some tea with our husband and introduce him to our subordinates.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:25 No.18927078
    Check with husbandu concerning any major/minor crisis going on.

    if none are found, take hm back to base to "discuss tactics".

    With champagne
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:28 No.18927113
    We're still at HQ, not our base, so most of our subordinates aren't here. It's actually a bit of a drive away from here.

    We should deal with the immediate problem of Martians enacting their version of Operation Sealion and dropping troops and armor all over the English countryside first.
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)21:32 No.18927155
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    Current Battalion status
    >Radio 1st Co, gearing up for a counter offensive, Barkmann reports no enemy activity within range of the town.
    >2nd company is awaiting shipments from Germany near Dover,
    >Most of the remaining Companies are around the London area, getting loaded by rail to link up at Gloucester. Several elements ( like our lovely Manfred of the 5th) are mixed in with the 1st.

    It basicly boils down to this, do you want to slap some Martian shit, or do you trust the force and let the stupid 501st idiot witches deal with the main assault?
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:34 No.18927184
    You kidding? Those twats can't do anything right.
    Let's get to slappin'.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:35 No.18927191
    Start slappin shit
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:35 No.18927194
    Lets slap some Martian shit. We can't let those flying harlots to take all the glory.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:38 No.18927233
    Leave the job to a band of tail-wagging incompetents?

    HAH! Where there is shit we shall slap it!
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)21:39 No.18927237
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    Slap some shit. Lets show the Flybitches how we to do it on the ground.
    >> Fritz the somali pirate 04/30/12(Mon)21:40 No.18927247
    Time to fuck some shit up.
    >> !UdzMmUq0Oc 04/30/12(Mon)21:40 No.18927254
    We can't let some little girls show us up.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:40 No.18927257

    Let's roll.


    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:45 No.18927318

    Stupid planewitches don't know what the fuck they're doing. Slap some martians.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:45 No.18927326
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    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)21:56 No.18927456
    Damn. Panzers are so unreliable...
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)22:02 No.18927520
    I break down all the time. But I swear, I totally am writing, its just... a slow night for me
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:05 No.18927557
    If you need me to distract people with loli Rin and loli Sakura being cared for by Archer, just let me know and I'll buy you some time.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:10 No.18927618

    bro stop


    bro stop that
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)22:10 No.18927627
    From what you have heard over the radio, it seems like the main martian assault is taking place a bit north of London... And the closest witch unit is the 501st... THOSE AERONAUTICAL HOMOSEXUALS! HOW DO THEY EXPECT TO HURT MARTIANS WITH SMALL ARMS? FUCKING AMATEURS! REAL WITCHES HAVE THEIR SOULS WEIGHED DOWN BY GRAVIT... You are just going off in a mental tangent..

    "Barkmann! I am taking the express to London, I'll be stealing some of 2nd Platoon. Move the rest of the company here to protect HQ" You turn off your radio. "Victor, stay here. If anything happens to you, I'd bring you back to life just so I can get one of our sons to kick in your teeth."

    Leaving the stunned Victor in place, you remount, and make your way to the base... Thats when you see the C-47 Skytrains. Loading up in the first one on the runway, you see 2 fellow witches, Cpt Wood-box er Pine-Coffin, and a shorter witch who you have seen befor...

    "H-hey mum!" The witch yells over the sound of the propeller. She goes to stand up, but hits head off the roof. Regardless of hitting her head, her whole face lights up when she sees you.

    You almost have a heart attack from seeing her again. God damn, if you weren't married, you would cuddle up with her every god damn minute of every god damn day. She's a little over 4ft tall and cute as a bug, she hails from interwar Poland. She was transferred to the magical academy in Birmingham as her parents knew your family back in the day.

    But enough about sexing up young witches, we got some chutes to para!
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:11 No.18927629

    aww shee, spidertime.
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)22:11 No.18927634
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:11 No.18927636
    This is the kind of shitposting that people come to /tg/ to avoid.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:13 No.18927663
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:13 No.18927671
    Give mini-witch a hug and a noogie. Tell her that we're going to drop on top of those Aliums and kick their ass.
    >> Crix !!nLvSV/0cRma 04/30/12(Mon)22:14 No.18927679
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    panzer you're fired
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:15 No.18927691
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    Real witches have their souls weighed down by gravity, well then when the war goes bad for the Martians, expect a colony drop.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:15 No.18927693
    Panzer got werfed?
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)22:15 No.18927695
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    Back to the normal thread then...
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:16 No.18927706
    Stop that diomedes, you aren't even in the same universe, how did you steal Minna's mug?
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)22:16 No.18927707
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    What great words of encouragement coming from somebody who I totally respect
    >> !UdzMmUq0Oc 04/30/12(Mon)22:18 No.18927725
    Mini-witch sounds absolutely adorable. We must find time to cuddle her regardless.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:18 No.18927734
    So wait, are we going to be doing an airdrop?
    I thought we weren't rated for that.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:19 No.18927741
    Paradropping women in tank-pants.

    Now I've seen everything.
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)22:20 No.18927756
    Well.... your Churchill isn't...
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)22:20 No.18927768
    Gory Gory What a Hell of a Way to Die
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:23 No.18927798
    Time for slavshit?
    >> Fritz the somali pirate 04/30/12(Mon)22:26 No.18927839
    Shhh, Magic aint gotta explain shit.
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)22:42 No.18928052
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    You feel the steel below your strikers lurch forwards and upwards, fuck, you just hope your borrowed strikers can do it.

    "S-s-so mum... H-how have you b-been?" the Polish witch stutters out.

    "I've been around, nothing too exciting. What have you been doing love?"

    She goes on for seemingly forever, not that it's a bad thing. You will need all the positive thoughts to do this jump successfully...

    Current witchventory
    Plane A
    Cpt Pine-Coffin Mk VII Tetracrh Tank
    2nd Lt Sylwia Koszustki M5A1 Stuart
    Yourself MkVI Crusader

    Plane B
    Cpt Linda Anderson M22 Locust
    Lt Barbra Mackenzie M18 Hellcat
    Lt Claire Jackson M4A2 Sherman

    2x BF-109s
    Major Matilda Schmidt BF110
    Generalfeldmarschall Malene von Richthofen BF109F

    The trip takes almost an hour, but when you enter near London airspace, you can hear the fighting, and looking out of the drop door, you can see the giant freighter being engaged by some stupid heavy fighter.

    Who or what do you pray to before you jump?
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:43 No.18928076
    >imply we dont just jump now
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:45 No.18928096
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    The god of bouncing, MC!
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:45 No.18928100
    Pray to God, King, and Nuffield Mecha that we hit the ground before some Martian Firebee takes us out, and that the suspension holds.
    Then we jump.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:45 No.18928102
    Vishnu? This seems like a Vishnu sort of day to me.

    Also we should be envious of the chick with the Hellcat strikers because she can hit highway speeds and shit.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:46 No.18928113
    Give mini-witch a kiss on the forehead and a good hug to calm her down.

    We don't need to pray to anything, we've been through similar things hundred of times. We only have one wish, the same one we've had every time we've jumped since we met Victor. That we get back to him and the kettle is already boiling when we see him again.
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)22:47 No.18928132
    No prayers.
    Just say "SOD THIS!" and jump.
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)22:48 No.18928149
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    To apologize for the SPIDERS
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)22:49 No.18928158
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    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:49 No.18928165

    Shh, no prayers.

    Only dreams now.
    >> Fritz the somali pirate 04/30/12(Mon)22:49 No.18928173
    This, we've seen too much shit to still pray to anything.
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)22:49 No.18928176
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    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:50 No.18928191
    Why, for King and Country of course!
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:50 No.18928194
    Not even some sort of blood god?
    >> Dario 04/30/12(Mon)22:51 No.18928204
    ...I'm going to have to fix these, aren't I?
    >> Fritz the somali pirate 04/30/12(Mon)22:51 No.18928207
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)22:52 No.18928212
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    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:53 No.18928241
    >Not Mandy, short for Mandell

    It's even a German name, damn it.
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)22:53 No.18928244
    Yeah. Not mine though. BLAME GOOGLE FOR THIS SHIT.
    Trying to Make up for Spidermaning this thread.
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)22:54 No.18928260
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    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:54 No.18928267
    Really isn't necessary yo.
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)22:55 No.18928275
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    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)22:56 No.18928280
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    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:56 No.18928288
    Y'know, Arch, it doesn't matter WHAT you're spamming, it's still spamming.
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)22:57 No.18928300
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    It is for me.
    >> Dario 04/30/12(Mon)22:57 No.18928306
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    Oh screw this I'm not fixing all of them. I don't know if this one is supposed to not untap as normal or what, but including that clause made the text smaller and unappealing so it's been omitted.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)22:59 No.18928319
    No like, this isn't your thread. People aren't here to watch you post dumb stuff. If you want an MTG Tank Cards and Spiderman Macros thread, make one.
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)23:00 No.18928341
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    You and your fellow witches fall though the sky like bricks learning to swim. All six of you manage to make it to landfall with no problem, but the escorts have got caught in a tussle with some Martian fire-bees. You can feel the earth itself shake as the god damn Fritz makes a "controlled decent" into some poor bloke's field.

    As you tune your radio to the local frequencies, you hear something... Odd.


    "But oddball! Those martians will eat us alive! We stand no chance against those monsters!"


    From the clarity of the transmission, you can assume they are only a few hundred feet away. The Fritz is about 32k ft away at your estimates. No enemies in the local area, what are your orders?
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:02 No.18928365
    Link up with the local ground forces, get a sitrep on Martian infantry and armor pockets.
    Then we start kicking Martian shit in.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:02 No.18928367

    Link up with nearby humans, go save the queen of the flying circus in a manner that is incredibly humiliating to her.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:03 No.18928371

    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:03 No.18928382

    God damn it, Panzer. I was proud of you when you started spelling Eila correctly, but now this.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:03 No.18928383
    FIND THE VOICE! GROUP UP! We need more numbers.
    >> Writefag 04/30/12(Mon)23:03 No.18928389

    Rendevous with local forces. This Oddball character seems to have a good head on his shoulders, and he's probably got a better handle on the situation than you do.
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)23:04 No.18928395
    Fine fine. I'm stopping.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:04 No.18928398
    Get to Moriarty and Oddball, link up with the local forces, get a handle on the situation then go out to slap their shit. I'm betting that six tank witches will mellow out his Negative Waves.
    >> Fritz the drunk somali pirate 04/30/12(Mon)23:05 No.18928415
    Link up with nearest friendly elements.
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)23:05 No.18928419
    Link up. Time to party like its 1918.
    >> Dario 04/30/12(Mon)23:06 No.18928425
         File: 1335841570.jpg-(43 KB, 375x523, T-34 Tank.jpg)
    43 KB
    Yeah no I'm done fixing these things. These suck.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:06 No.18928431
    Is it just me, or are we oddly in consensus this night?
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:06 No.18928433
    Find "Oddball". If he proves himself to be a good tanker, poach him into our command.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:06 No.18928439
         File: 1335841612.jpg-(186 KB, 1035x798, M103 9 kills.jpg)
    186 KB
    Is this some sort of World of Tanks thread in disguise?

    Well just tossing this out there, contact me for platooning if I'm not busy/already platooned.
    >wish we had spoiler images
    >continue with the thread as usual
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:07 No.18928446
    Whats there to argue? WE TANKS NOW!
    >> Arch-Magos Winter !!GgQN8rJg+y8 04/30/12(Mon)23:08 No.18928450
    Again. Google. I didn't make these. Blame the assholes who did.
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)23:09 No.18928459
         File: 1335841756.jpg-(99 KB, 374x457, 1335497552261.jpg)
    99 KB
    How about you.. Ok you got me there, I'll stop being a dyslexic asshole~
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:15 No.18928527
    No, this is "We're a magical woman who wears a Churchill Tank as pants while fighting invading martians"
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:16 No.18928547
    Just saw this image is why I asked.
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)23:18 No.18928563
    You link up with this..... Tank commander Oddball of the 4th Yank armored division... You have never seen a loudspeaker attached to a tank like that... And why is the sherman's gun so bloody long? Sometimes you never get the answers you want...

    You head off towards the downed ship with your new found friends (As well as some infantry they brought along from the 35th infantry division).

    Current list of stuff you have
    6x Tonk witches (yourself included)
    3x Sherman custom tanks
    24x Infantry men riding the Shermans

    Before you head off, your mother's intuition tingles... Somebody you love is in danger....
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)23:19 No.18928577
         File: 1335842374.gif-(424 KB, 229x350, 1335645462981.gif)
    424 KB
    I play the shit out of world of tanks, Panther pride world wide ETC ETC, a few members of /tg/ party hard in #SWQ, a rizon irc channel. Most if not ALL of us play it
    >> Dario 04/30/12(Mon)23:21 No.18928601
    >Somebody you love is in danger
    I don't like this feel.
    >Most if not ALL of us play it
    I don't, but I'm not around often enough to matter.
    >> Fritz the drunk somali pirate 04/30/12(Mon)23:22 No.18928614
    jesus that episode came out 3 days ago and theres already a gif.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:23 No.18928625
    So short...
    But still we are getting somewhere
    >> !UdzMmUq0Oc 04/30/12(Mon)23:23 No.18928626
    What is it from?
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:24 No.18928639
    I've said the same thing about MLP gifs. Except it's more "3 hours". In one case, "10 minutes".
    >> Fritz the drunk somali pirate 04/30/12(Mon)23:24 No.18928643
    upotte!! pretty badass show where the students at a school are all guns.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:24 No.18928645
    /a/ makes gifs of things before they even finish watching the episode sometimes.
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)23:26 No.18928666
         File: 1335842804.gif-(349 KB, 260x400, 1335649486421.gif)
    349 KB
    Shit, I posted the wrong one
    Yeah it was short, but I did not expect to get this far so quickly. I'll post when the next tread will be (aha I am so cleaver) durring SWQ proper tomorrow. Didn't have anything planned beyond this and my combat system is still shaky
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:28 No.18928700
    You have the party hard version of that gif by any chance?
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)23:30 No.18928717
         File: 1335843013.jpg-(1.16 MB, 2600x2164, 1335478430965.jpg)
    1.16 MB
    Nah, I haven't been to /a/ since the episode dropped on Saturday
    >> !UdzMmUq0Oc 04/30/12(Mon)23:31 No.18928729
    Damnit, I already have too much stuff to watch.
    >> archivalfag 04/30/12(Mon)23:34 No.18928780
         File: 1335843273.gif-(2.51 MB, 400x331, 1334875557001.gif)
    2.51 MB
    Whelp. Since there's pretty much nothing new for the archive except this I'll just hold out till tomorrow to put it together.

    >> NavalAnon !!jz5JQZ1dN2Q 04/30/12(Mon)23:35 No.18928798
    HAha, Its time for Story Gaiden I guess.

    Sorry, second half is .. hard, anyway..

    “Torpedoman First Class.. You are herby given the rank and responsibilities of a Chief Petty Officer, after this date...”

    I remembered this day like it was yesterday.. it was, in fact, and after the long party, finding the Khakis freshly issued from the Stares, and now, my newest assignment was to train the newest sparkles from home, Torpedo Witches...

    “Why me.. why the hell do I have to do this damn job... training kids now?” The thoughts of going through the entire ordeal, teaching the children the proper military bearing, and to hear they would be heading to the fleet as Petty Officers, after only 3 month of school..

    “This war is going to be the death of me,” I thought, before reading over the dossiers of the newly designated “10th Anti Submarine Witch Taskforce.”
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:36 No.18928821
    >nothing new
    >new writefaggotry starts a minute later

    Wow, that's some interesting timing...
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)23:37 No.18928826
    you should only update the huge archive like, once a week, not every thread

    Don't want one of my comrades overworking himself for something so silly
    >> NavalAnon !!jz5JQZ1dN2Q 04/30/12(Mon)23:38 No.18928843
    (ugh i hate 4chan and its post limits sometimes)

    “..So, lets see here.. Japan’s sending 1 girl over.. apparently biplane ace.. but I don’t get why they wouldn’t just give her some proper Strikers...

    The first documents were plain, even if the translation left something to be desired, mentioning things like “Flowering Blossoms of the Northeast,” as a magical talent.

    “Damn linguists can’t get their heads from their asses, fuck...”

    “And wait.. we have one witch, from Nome. apparently, expert on tracking whales.. .. before heading to the recruiting station... apparently her aptitude scores are off the charts... On to the next one..”

    “Dorothy.. Freeman. wait..” Taking a quick look at the picture, I took a smoke,breathing in the rich tropical tobacco, one of the few perks of being stuck to this barren tropical paradise. “She’s a.. a.. well I’ll be, I never expected those Southerners to approve a Colored piloting these new Strikers..” I laughed “Magnetic skill.. so you meant to tell me she can control magnetism! Thats great..”, I had to finish my laughter, this was just absurd, before reading onto the next and final dossier, a job written in formal English. Apparently the Soviets could write in English if they wanted to it seemed.

    “One final witch, with her own support.. Air Effect Striker: Type Anti Shipping... What is this..”

    I looked over the paperwork, which was full of REDACTED, and CLASSFIED, before revealing the magical engine, and huge amounts of complex diagrams, stuff way above my head and clearance..
    >> archivalfag 04/30/12(Mon)23:38 No.18928844
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    33 KB
    >> NavalAnon !!jz5JQZ1dN2Q 04/30/12(Mon)23:40 No.18928863
    I looked over the paperwork, which was full of REDACTED, and CLASSFIED, before revealing the magical engine, and huge amounts of complex diagrams, stuff way above my head and clearance..

    “..I’ll have to drop this off at DIVO’s office,. fuck these Soviets are fucking me...”
    There was a single picture a black and white photograph of a young girl, with plain black hair, and a happy look on her face.
    “Must be nice to be new and not cynical and old... ha, and here I am, a 28 year old chief and I’m acting bitter...”

    I took another drag of my cigarette before taking stock of the situation. “So I got a Jap, a Black, a Ice Injun, and a Russian,.. I wasn’t prepared for this, and back in Indiana.. they wouldn’t belive this...”

    END LCPO Gaiden 1.

    DIVO’s office

    0021 Local Time

    “So if I’ve got this right..” the Lt sighed, “I get to support the Captain, when he comes over from Pearl...

    “That CAPTAIN..” the voice over the phone shouted, “Is the reason why you are even here today, SHIPMATE, his voice oozed with utter contempt for the junior officer, “Now you will make sure his newest witches are sat, both in uniform and actions. There is a Chief who will do most of the damn work, lord knows the Society said he should be promoted, and if they said it, we do it!

    “But.. we shouldn’t mention them over the lines.. the ..reds might be listening in..

    “You are talking over the most secure line in the world right now, but right now we are doing this as both a favor to the Academy and our own Society, because with Castle Barin right now, they are screaming that he is going to break the Covenant.. and yes, just because we are Americans doesn’t mean we don’t follow that...”
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 04/30/12(Mon)23:41 No.18928886
    >10th Anti Submarine Witch Taskforce.
    >Anti Sub

    I think we're going to have some disputes, R-Blade
    >> Fritz the drunk somali pirate 04/30/12(Mon)23:41 No.18928895
    I know that feel bro, i have like 30 series lined up to watch.
    >> NavalAnon !!jz5JQZ1dN2Q 04/30/12(Mon)23:41 No.18928897
    He sighed, “Anyway, between me and you Anderson.. I think you are going to do fine.. as a Division officer of this unit, you will get to observe the cute girls, and the .. ace at work, and under that Captain.. I know we will capture that unit, or buy enough time for the ...project to be finished.

    “ Frederick , over and out.”

    “And great.. I have a daughter the age of some of these Witches, and they are sending these girls.. hunting this damn Marsian project.. Rickover is convinced that we can replicate that thing’s technology, but they don’t even have SUPER ready..”

    He took a quick breath, looking down at his warfare pins. Submarine warfare wasn’t like this. No submarine was that quiet, that impossible, able to dive down that fast and yet never surface for air.. what the hell had he gotten into now?

    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:43 No.18928918
    I like it
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:43 No.18928923
    Technically, he started his before you did yours.
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 04/30/12(Mon)23:44 No.18928932
    That's fine.

    I don't want him torping my witches. I'll kill them when I'm damned well ready.
    >> NavalAnon !!jz5JQZ1dN2Q 04/30/12(Mon)23:45 No.18928954
    Anti Submarine Witches: Episode 0.5 “So a Torpedo, a Witch and a German walked into a bar right...”
    “So, you mean that they are under attack, by one of those Martian jets, and we don’t have anything here.. no Witches, no P-39s, no Navy nothing?!” The Capitan was clear, as he screamed at the local garrison.

    Deigo Garcia was isolated. Isolated enough that it was originally full of nothing more than seaplane, and a refueling base for English ships, before the Second World War became the Invasion war, but even then, the cost and demand for witches left this outpost of freedom and humanity poor and drained, with the exception of one thing..

    “We have one thing sir, but she.. well she’s a... how do I say this. She was in a coma for the last 18 months. Hell, we aren’t even sure if she realizes what year it is for that matter, I mean, she can still fly but until yesterday she thought Hitler was still alive!”

    “Get her up into the air, and yesterday.”


    “Do you question the orders of your superiors, Petty Officer?”

    “No sir, bu..”

    “Do it, or I will have your head, your LPO’s head, and everyone involved with the decision to send me a convict witch, yesterday!” With the furious slamming of a phone, Rickover took a breath. Field command at an isolated island was nothing like leading the repair work back at Pearl, but with the command decision to split the submarine fleet along the South Pacafic and Australian region to protect the boats mean the only chance for advancement was to take one of these commands.
    >> NavalAnon !!jz5JQZ1dN2Q 04/30/12(Mon)23:46 No.18928975
    >implying we aren't going to team up
    In the air, several of the more unusual, “Vampire” fighters were lazily firing masers, using their extended fins to collect energy from the ocean’s currents, and fire. They weren’t as powerful as the fighters on the Continent, or even the first to drop, but they made up for it in volume, seemingly firing without needing to cool down, the furious beams tearing apart the Short Sunderland that was struggling to stay in the air.

    “.Hey Witches,” the pilot said, “We have some RAF guys here, they will help you jump out before this plane goes down for good, you are more important than us here, because you’ll save Australia, right?” he laughed, as the number 4 engine caught on fire, causing the propeller plane to dive faster.

    “No sir!” the American witch said, her southern accent filled with a sort of glee, before she aimed a torpedo directly at the fighter.

    “Excuse me, miss darkie,” one of the Japanese witches responded, “But, in training, these torpedoes did not have the range to.. fly.

    “Its Dorothy, and I’m magic, “ she said, before channeling the familiar, the plover feathers and magical power not helping the flying boat’s stability. “Now hang on Foxes, and keep my aim steady...” She collected electromagnetic energy, her magical ability acting as a conduit for the Earth‘s own magnetic field. ”Build up, just like they said in classes!” she shouted, as Élisabeth, the Northermost witch stared, ”The.. Northern lights.. ”
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 04/30/12(Mon)23:47 No.18928991
    >implying I will have witches left to team up with
    >> NavalAnon !!jz5JQZ1dN2Q 04/30/12(Mon)23:48 No.18929001
    “Everything in the West..”Kazuki said, “Always so violent!” she shouted, before she put up her shields, the effort doing little more but rocking the craft so much so that number 2 and number 3 engines failed, violently, as the shockwave from the torpedo caused the plane to rapidly descend dropping tens of feet in a near instant.

    Dorothy then fired the torpedo, the magic combined with the compressed air, and electrical energy launching the weapon from the back of the flying boat, through the air at a speed that would rival future air to air missiles,. Normally, the electrical weapon would be useless, as it sunk into the ocean, but due to an unusual quirk in quantum-physics and electron shells.. the anti gravity system was a huge attractive force for the Mark 14, which LEAPED out of the water, and impacted the first fighter exploded, violently, the collected energy from its microwave energy system radiating out in all directions.

    “Great! The American is going to kill us all if the Aliens don’t.. why couldn’t I be home, fighting off the aliens..” She focused her own familiar, the bear ears and short tail appearing, as she attempted to hold the plane somewhat together.. “For.. the motherland I’ll tolerate you all... but I don’t have to like you..”
    >> Oddball !mYedictMKA 04/30/12(Mon)23:50 No.18929034
         File: 1335844230.jpg-(83 KB, 1280x717, 1335481634149.jpg)
    83 KB
    Enough with those negative implications!
    >> NavalAnon !!jz5JQZ1dN2Q 04/30/12(Mon)23:53 No.18929088
    All of this, was going on, parallel to a prisoner’s awakening from her medically induced coma, as part of a long agreed plan.

    Her dusty brown hair, and still somewhat pressed uniform made it clear that she was one of the more... important loyalists.

    “..No.. this ..we are loosing?!” she shots, “This can’t be right.. how long have I been sleeping for?”

    “About 18 months, give or take,” the man said, as the silver officer’s crest gleamed in the brightly lit cell. Even the prison here on the island had its own cheer and charm.

    “My name is Oberleutnant Klaudia Wolfgang..and what do you want,. ah, the Americans have degraded so much to allow.. scum like you to take command...” Her cold words were only met with a disgusted look, before the Capitan began to speak. “Even faking his signature, but .. Even you wouldn’t fall this low!” she tried to get up, but the chain kept her down.

    “Magically forged chains, made by the witches of..

    “The Ruhr..” she nodded. “Speak, Captain, I’ll listen.. I don’t think my sisters would betray Donetiz, if Hitler has really died!”
    >> NavalAnon !!jz5JQZ1dN2Q 04/30/12(Mon)23:55 No.18929116
    “If it was up to me, you would be sent back to the States to stand trials, but we have a problem. You I assume know about the invasion?”

    She shook her head, “Invasion by the Soviets? We will repel them in no time, and those secret weapon they have.. German Engineering will..”

    “You don’t understand,” Rickover interrupted, “You were hit on the head during a Martian attack on Berlin. You have been under medical care in Belgium before being moved to Switzerland. Its been a year now.. and things have changed. Hell, Donetiz is in charge now, instead of .. t hat man..” he Do you want to fly, and serve your planet, or spew hate and stew here for the rest of your natural flying life. besides, read this..”

    “...American lie.." she started to read, the book Reich.. but .. I have one condign,” she said,

    “..I’m open..”

    “I don’t fight for you, I fight for Deutschland' and the Kriegmarine..” she said, before getting up, “Now where is my striker..”

    “What is THAT?” she said, looking at the set of P-40 strikers, the nearly obsolete fighter waiting on the runway. “Where is my Bf-109?” she seemed confused before climbing in the fighter.

    “So, I assume I have to take down. that!” she stopped, watching one fighter explode. “Damn good job!” She took off, into the blue skies over Diego Garcia, as the trainee witches all argued over who was most responsible for that downed fighter.
    >> Anonymous 04/30/12(Mon)23:56 No.18929124
    Uh, hey, NavalAnon?
    Your writing kinda sucks a little.
    >> NavalAnon !!jz5JQZ1dN2Q 04/30/12(Mon)23:56 No.18929125

    “Ha.. Capitan,” another witch walked into the briefing room. “I’m sorry about this..”
    Rickover laughed, “I haven’t had that much fun in ages.. thank you for that, Korvettenkapitan..”

    The Witch saluted, “I hope you can reform her, her flight skills are amazing, even if she is.. not from this time..”

    END EPISODE 0.5 “A Torpedo, a Magnet, and A German together! Wait, you mean the title doesn’t match the Intro?!”

    i did a thing

    i think i may try some more

    >> NavalAnon !!jz5JQZ1dN2Q 04/30/12(Mon)23:59 No.18929165
    thank god, I was afraid 4chan became a hugbox, scream at me.

    (no seriously I need critisim ,this is the first fiction i've done in years)
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)00:00 No.18929173
    I suppose you don't want me screaming at you like I do at Panzer?
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)00:08 No.18929264
    no one wants to listen to you yelling "oh yeah Panzer give me the chocolate!~<3" again.
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)00:09 No.18929286
    Bold claim.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)00:11 No.18929314

    "Robin, what-"
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)00:14 No.18929363
    Killing myself.
    >> Fritz the drunk somali pirate 05/01/12(Tue)00:18 No.18929402
    stream it.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)00:18 No.18929404
    That felt *really* disjointed. Jumping all over the place. Really damn hard to keep track of what's gong on.

    Also, dialogue. It felt like every character was standing up on a podium giving a monologue to the senate. It felt really overdramatic and a bit forced, like they were all just reading (badly) from a script.

    Also adjective spam to describe dialogue.
    >"his voice oozed with utter contempt for the junior officer"
    That sort of thing in the middle of a sentence is jarring, gratuitous, and is the same sort of godawful trap that the recent crop of ex-serviceman writers all fall into - "I'm going to write a cheesy, gratuitous war novel with 'TACTICOOL CALLSIGNS ERRYWHERE'!" etc.

    So yeah. 4/10. Good concept, mind-bendingly bad execution.
    >> Panzerhexen !mYedictMKA 05/01/12(Tue)00:20 No.18929438
    Oh Anon-kun, how shitty was my writing tonight?
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)00:21 No.18929459
    Anon, anon! Judge my writing please!
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)00:23 No.18929478
    Sentence structure and composition is pretty bad. You can see what you're trying to get across, but it's clumsy, messy, has atrocious grammar and uses far too many ellipses. Well, I *think* they're supposed to be ellipses. You only used two dots for half of them, which makes it an absolute bitch to tell if it's just a mist-typed period/full-stop or yet another goddamn ellipsis.
    >> Fritz the somali pirate 05/01/12(Tue)00:23 No.18929492
    Soooo, no stream?
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)00:32 No.18929599
    Not too bad, actually. As the last few times, everything felt hyper-condensed, though. I think you're trying to pack too many happenings into too few words to mash it all into one post.

    Don't be afraid to spread it out a bit, and to take the time to properly set the scene. As it is, i'm only just starting to get the feel for what's going on and suddenly there's a scene or location change, fast enough i'm worried about whiplash.

    Also, it's not a huge deal with you, but there's a quite a few places where you use ellipses in a spot where a period/full-stop would do just fine.

    General advice for all writers: Always think long and hard before using an ellipsis. "Do I really need this?", "Will a full-stop do the same job?", "Is it making my sentence look like a monkey bashed it's fist into the keyboard a few dozen times?" and so forth.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)00:33 No.18929610

    You wrote something?
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)00:33 No.18929613
    ...Unfortunately. I'm also writing Subwitches.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)00:36 No.18929637
    What writing? you posted less than either of the writefags.

    You really need to plan a bit more if you don't wanna end up cutting them short, do it real simple for extra speed and versatility like this:

    we jump and land, options:

    a: hang with oddball
    b:scout solo
    c:consolidate with the partisans
    d:trolling option (something innuendo)

    if A options:
    >inquiry about custom shermans
    >ask for your dance (some real hip swing)
    >keep an eye on miniwicth
    >chat whit woodbox

    if B: describe the terrain, insert descriptions of familiar elements from SWQ and Noop's

    A and B both lead to the same encounter, A whit extra support and b whit surprise element extra round

    c lets you introduce some quirky peasants and drop refereces to the space cow, them you loop back to b,

    D is for huehuehue, post some REAL SHODDY tentacle rape lines or yuri filled whit stock phrases while you work in either A or B as the real post

    all this gives the illusion of variety while in fact you're only working on one encounter. it's also good to have a few ready-made descriptions of combat on hand in case you end up derailed
    >> Writefag no 2 05/01/12(Tue)00:36 No.18929643
    Say, since we have an anon actually handing out legitimate literary criticism, could I pile on and get your opinion on my writing in Prune Barge Shuffle?

    (I know I had/have an issue with tenses. That is a ongoing battle.)
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)00:37 No.18929653
    Here's a bit of my Subwitches WIP for you to mull over:

    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)00:42 No.18929679
    Oh wow I don't like what I've written at all.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)00:43 No.18929691

    Maybe you should stick to the fapfic. It was decent enough.
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)00:43 No.18929694
    But I don't want to write fapfics
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)00:44 No.18929707
    It is your destiny, young wordsmith.
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)00:45 No.18929712
    Fuck you, I'm gonna write Subwitches and then start the quest.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)00:48 No.18929751
    other than those issues whit the tenses I have a bit of trouble imagining the layout of the ship
    may be the fact that I'm a Dostoevskyfag and want every description to be intricate and extensive. that or maybe I'm just plain not familiar with ships AT ALL.


    Well other than some formatting issues making it hard to the eye its nice, and there's a feel for the character's personality even is such a small fragment.

    still love the way you describe foreplay, just handle the combat as if you're manhandling an imouto and you'll be golden
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)00:48 No.18929758
    I don't have too many issues with it, honestly. The tenses are a little twitchy, like you said, but apart from that, all I can think of as a really visible flaw is the occasional odd word choice that makes me lose the flow and have it pick it back up. But i've only seen that a couple of times, so I don' think it's a really big problem. It's the sort of thing that an editor would make you re-write for publication, but just for slapping it up on the intrawebs as fanfic, it doesn't really matter.
    >> BANDWAGONING FOR FUN AND PROFIT. Writefag 05/01/12(Tue)00:50 No.18929779

    Right then. And T&L?

    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)00:50 No.18929783
    Literaryfag, mind giving my stuff a lookover?
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)00:52 No.18929803
    It's okayish. Except for the last bit. I'd change it to
    >As Kukyendall angrily took the substriker to the side of the pool and started releasing herself from it, the director kneaded his brow. He felt a headache coming on.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)00:53 No.18929812
    He said write more fapfiction, or at least treat your writing like it.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)00:53 No.18929814

    For a short piece, it's rather good. I don't see any glaring flaws that make it hard or jarring to read. The sentences sort of feel a bit short, but reading over them I can't see a lot of ways to make them feel more comfortable without having them run-on horribly.

    I'd be very interested to see how it works in a longer piece, though.
    >> Writefag no 2 05/01/12(Tue)00:55 No.18929842
         File: 1335848101.jpg-(80 KB, 912x466, USS California underway in the(...).jpg)
    80 KB
    Here's an aerial shot of the ship. Technically, it's her sister ship in May 1942, but I'm picturing the California looking almost identical to the Tennessee at that point in time.

    Aside from that, I'm going on scant information. There aren't that many interior shots of the ship, and none of the conning tower or bridge interior that I can find. I'm just basically making up the compartment layout as I go.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)00:55 No.18929853
         File: 1335848153.jpg-(407 KB, 1048x1519, 09_tattletales_1933_04.jpg)
    407 KB
    15 parts? can I get back to you on tomorrow's SWQ? I still have a stockpile of wartime girlie mags to turn into strike witches quest fanart, I reckon a few hours of gimping can turn this into a wicked Ericka pinup
    >> Writefag 05/01/12(Tue)00:59 No.18929889

    Yes. Fucking yes. Take all the time you need if that's what you're up to.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)00:59 No.18929891
    It flows well, although breaking it up into individual posts on /tg/ certainly doesn't do it any favours.

    One thing that I did notice is that you occasionally have an odd choice of adjectives; Using "the" when "A" would be better, and vice-versa. And a couple of places where said adjectives seem to be missing altogether, though that particular issue seems to have tailed off to a minimum lately.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)00:59 No.18929892
    well you see, in my head a conning tower is the tower where you give it to Connie good and hard, but it's probably something like the command center or some sort of place where there's tons of radios, screens and a big chair for the top dog to sit and bark big works
    >> Writefag no 2 05/01/12(Tue)01:01 No.18929916
    It's that oblong tower right behind the second turret. It's a heavily armored place for the ship's captain to command his vessel during combat, since the regular navigation bridge is unarmored.
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)01:02 No.18929920
    Yeah, that part especially bugs me. I might just rewrite this portion again.

    If you'd like, I can post all that I've written so far.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)01:30 No.18930248
    well i'd like you to, but I'll have to get back to you after prunefriend
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)01:32 No.18930261

    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)01:34 No.18930277
    the author of T&L,: he's dry, wrinkly and only good for constipation hehehe
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)01:36 No.18930299
    >sending subwitches into Australian waters
    Nooooo they'll all be dead in seconds.
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)01:37 No.18930309
    You say that like they'll make it to Oz.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)01:39 No.18930331
    but their familiars are salties, box jellies and whites, they'll do ok

    if you do snuff as good as incest I'm looking forward to your death scenes
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)01:39 No.18930338

    You fucks will never let me live this down, will you?
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)01:42 No.18930369
    Write more please.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)01:44 No.18930378
    as long as it rustles you, learn to roll with them.

    it's not like Kotters it's your real life name, right? and even then who's gonna care if you one wrote an ero fanfic of the serious fanfic of a softcore lolicon militaryfag ace pilot slashfic?

    besides, you're good at it.
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)01:46 No.18930392

    See, this is how I know you're just saying shit.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)01:53 No.18930459
    Fine. you suck at it. Now do more
    >> Crix !!nLvSV/0cRma 05/01/12(Tue)01:53 No.18930461
         File: 1335851629.jpg-(74 KB, 400x400, don't draw things like that..jpg)
    74 KB
    >if you one wrote an ero fanfic of the serious fanfic of a softcore lolicon militaryfag ace pilot slashfic
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)01:54 No.18930472
    I don't wish to write what I can't write well, and writing fap fiction makes me feel uncomfortable.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)01:54 No.18930474
    look bud, you avoided awkwardly describing the penetration one handed and you sidestepped the pitfalls of purple prose and dry medical descriptors.

    you're MERELY good, nowhere as good as /d/'s , /l/'s or gurochan's writefags and galaxies away of ever being published at all, you're just good enough for a quick nut after a short quest thread, and thats all we need of you.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)01:58 No.18930510
    don't think of the way your reader's sweaty nutsack slaps the underside of his fist like a pile-driver while you're writing, although knowing /tg/ they probably came before manging to untie their pajamas
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)01:59 No.18930519
    I'm going to egotistically assume you meant to target that at me.

    That level of quality is all I feel I need to achieve for 4chan, but knowing I can't do better without going into serious editing, planning, and rewriting mode is a bit depressing.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)02:03 No.18930555
    Just outta curiosity: We know Rommel is lurking in the frigidares of Castle Nopants, but where's Guderian? Nobody important, really, just the man who came up with the whole Blitzkrieg thing and wrote more on the subject of tanks (and, I guess in this setting, this includes Tank Witches) than any one man should be able to.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)02:09 No.18930602
    Damn it Kotters!! We praise you and you reject it, criticize and you get put down,

    Besides, if you go into the habit of "plan, edit, draft and rewrite" now you'll be a gnome at it by the time you get serious at writing; whether its regular stuff, quest threads or slash you cannot just assume you'll say anything worth reading in the first attempt. Hell, I do it with my posts just to make sure the ADD doesn't make them unreadable, this one took 5 re-reads and I still feel it's rubbish.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)02:11 No.18930626
    I ask that whenever I show up for a SWQ thread. Poor Guderian. And Von Manstein, Hoth, Von Witzelben, Von Kleist, Von Rundstedt and Von Kluge, for that matter. No-one remembers the shit-ton of Generals who were at least as good as or better than Rommel.
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)02:12 No.18930632
    If I take praise, I grow complacent. If I deflect criticism, I become delusional.

    Better to be depressed than woefully ignorant of one's shortcomings.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)02:17 No.18930669

    you see, it's because we need all the ones whose talent was a magical fluke and not actual skill in Hraad Knickersclad so the REAL soldiers can go and do the actual figthing

    I see, but just go something like "nah, I can do better next time" and put down the razor blade
    >> Kotters !frHeeRur5g 05/01/12(Tue)02:19 No.18930695
    Truthfully, I'm reacting in the extremes. I'm beaming at praise (even at the fapfic) and wilting at the criticism. By posting responses as I have been, I'm able to convince myself to tone shit down to more reasonable levels.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)02:24 No.18930737
    Guderian pretty much wrote the book... no, he actually -did- write the book that redefined armored warfare, away from using them as infantry support to the wonderful, terrible spearheads of mechanical death they turned out to be (AND THEN SOMEONE STUCK A FLAMETHROWER ON THEM BECAUSE IT WERFS FLAMMEN).

    Rommel is hot shit, but so is Guderian. Hell, wiki says that Rommel recommended Guderian take over command of the Afrika Korps while Rommel was recovering from health issues in germany, and Guderian got politicockblocked once again.

    The Nazis really hated their competent, brilliant strategists.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)02:34 No.18930810
    Good thing the Nazis were removed from power after most of the Nazi higher-ups got eaten on December 7. The Germans actually have SANE people running their war machine.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)02:44 No.18930874
    >The Germans actually have SANE people running their war machine.

    Does this mean the Graf Zeppelin and Peter Strasser CVs actually got completed and launched? Because that would be absolutely ballin'.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)02:52 No.18930923
    I was talkng OTL. Even with a good portion of Karlsland being ALIUM'd, they should have delicious, delicious versions of the thing that brought us here (the other one, not tits), that is, TANKS.

    Mmmm, Panthers. So many Panthers. And Tigers that actually work. And and and and and so many other things to turn into magical rollerblades while you're at it. (God, I love a world where aliums clear the way for more delicious tanks.)

    Unfortunately, black mistsoupgoop is probably going to play an ugly number on glorious, wonderful tanks. :(
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)03:00 No.18930965
    The USSR was the first country to have large mechanized units.
    Their first Tank Corps was raised in 1931.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)03:10 No.18931032
    Only because the Germans were artificially constrained in their rebuilding.

    Besides which, Tukhachevsky 's theories on mobile warfare and tank use, while advanced, post-dated Guderian's works and were less revolutionary in their application of armoured units.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)03:22 No.18931128
    And Heinz learned from Hart, Fuller and the British who learned from Monash and the Australians.

    Germany had the opportunity to employ a Mechanized and armoured elite on account of needing to totally rebuild and reorganise from scratch after WW1 and the limitations imposed by Versailles. Unlike the British, or especially the French, who were saddled with old tanks and old doctrines for their use.

    Hell, the French's Tank Corps still contained thousands of Renault FT-17s leftover from WW1 by 1940. Guderian aside, it was the ability to develop their new military equipment and doctrine entirely from scratch that allowed the Wehrmacht to be the revolutionary force it was in the early-war.
    (that said, this only applies tot he Mechanised elite. Most of the Heer was thoroughly traditional in equipment and organisation, the vast majority of it's logistics horse-drawn.)
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)03:23 No.18931136
    Well, we think. Guderian lived past '37, Tuchie didn't. Fucking Stalin. Shit that happened around that time means the records got messy, and a lot of Tuchie's stuff got scrubbed.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)11:17 No.18934246
    Holy penises this thread is still up
    >> !UdzMmUq0Oc 05/01/12(Tue)11:18 No.18934255
    No it isn't. This is all in your mind.
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)16:54 No.18937555
    >> Anonymous 05/01/12(Tue)19:15 No.18939222

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