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/tg/ - Traditional Games


File: 1338008873134.jpg-(303 KB, 853x1280, 010.jpg)
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You're the only person that posts here.

You have Multiple Personality Disorder, or atleast, that's what I think we have.

You've been talking to yourself for a long time, and never show any of your friends or family exactly what you are doing.

Please break the cycle. I don' want to wake up with my fingers on the keyboard again. What the fuck are you having me type?
>>
I'm disconnecting the keyboard, now.

Goodnight, me.
>>
>atleast
>don'
I spellcheck my posts manually before I submit them. You are not me.
>>
Cool story, bro
>>
>>19245087
YOU AREN'T ME!!!!!
>>
/r/ing that pasta where every human on earth has been the same person reincarnated billions of times in preparation for becoming the next God.

but if you're me, I guess you already knew I'd do that, huh?
>>
It's MPD, or DPD, or whatever the fuck they're calling it. Some of us may have some knowledge of some of the others, but it's not certain. Jesus Christ it's like 85% of me is a retard.
>>
>>19245087
My more pedantic personality points out that we call it Dissociative Identity Disorder now. He always was a dick.
>>
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SO I'M THE FAGGOT WHO KEEPS SAYING STUPID SHIT?

FUCK ME, WHY WON'T I SHUT THE FUCK UP

FUCK ME, GO SUCK A DICK
>>
>>19245104
Every time you fucked someone, you fucked yourself. LOL!
>>
>>19245142
so was that sex, or masturbation?
>>
>>19245149

Depends on if I liked it.

So I'm asking you, did we?
>>
>>19245142

Sex: one giant masturbation orgy.

If everyone is me, we should all have lots of sex everywhere.
>>
>>19245127
He also enjoys pointing out how you could make better plays at Magic, and how shitty your casual deck really is.

Not to mention how poorly you role-play. You honestly believe a man raised as a farmer thinks like that?
>>
my other personas on /co/ never point this shit out, I'll just chill there until we've stopped being so silly.
>>
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Gentleme's...let's all stop arguing, and try to get stuff done.

Our first point of business...How do we kill Superman?
>>
>>19245169

Easy

We kill the Batman
>>
>>19245169

Find largest chunk of kryptonite. Send it to him superluminal.
>>
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>>19245169

Fuck Super Man.
>>
>>19245169
Well, I'm sure one of me will think of something... What if he posts here too? Would that be suicide, or murder?
>>
>>19245161
Jesus Christ, one of my personalities is actually good at Magic?
Where the hell is he when I'm making all these MtG discussions?
>>
>>19245174

... But we're batman. We just need a few days to prepare and superman will be no more, the xeno bastard, interfering with us. THE ONE WHO IS NOT OF THE SOUL MUST BE BANISHED
>>
>>19245169
Are you sure you don't want to kill Samus first?
>>
>>19245189
I'm disapprovingly sighing and shaking my head.
>>
Anyone know about "Words of a Madman?"

The little known and aptly named forum "Words of a Madman" might be the real version of what OP is talking about: Aside from the occassional real person that dropped by, it's mostly one guy and his (all female) imaginary friends talking amongst themselves...since 2006. Nearly 4,000 posts, the vast majority of them by one person talking to himself. And as of 2012, it still lives on, having become little more than a miserable katamari of shattered dreams and seething hatred for humanity.

http://z11.invisionfree.com/WOAM/index.php?act=idx
>>
I must be one hell of a fast typer.
>>
>>19245197
nah, Other M did enough already.
>>
>>19245209
Tou-fucking-ché
>>
>>19245216

Jesus christ, did I really just say that?

I'm a fucking douche.
>>
>>19245221
Perhaps I'm a douché?
>>
>>19245221
I agree. I kind of want to go beat myself up
>>
>>19245240
I hate you, me.
>>
>>19245240
I just can't get over "PRRNT"
>>
>>19245256

Yes I can
>>
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Guys, guys, please. That's silly, how can you all just be one entity? Nonsense, I say. You're all just being paranoid.

Now shut the fuck up, I'm trying to nap and you're disturbing the verisimilitude of my dreams.
>>
>>19245258

No I can't
>>
>>19245274
well, I certainly can't, although I guess I can't speak for you. Oh wait, you're me, so yes I can!
>>
>You're the only person that posts here.
So uh what happen to other human and how did I get pass the flood detector?
>>
>>19245274

Unless I want to wake up with no fingers because I broken them all off, YES I WILL
>>
>>19245285

Welcome to the machine.
>>
>>19245285

>I'm the only person that post here...

>That means I'm S.T.A.L.K.E.R.

Fuck, this is fucking gay....

>It also means I'm MR. RAGE

FUCK YES, I'M AWESOME
>>
>>19245285

Flood detector is actually a delusion I sustain to maintain the illusion of multiplicity.
>>
>>19245308

It also means you're Papa-N.
>>
>>19245206
oh god, that forum is kind disturbing. I remember also reading about this Buffy fan-forum that had thousands of posts, all by one person. It's been taken down, but I guess this kind of thing happens more than I'd like to know?

Fuck, where do I find time to write all these posts?
>>
>>19245327

When was the last time I ate?
>>
Ah, I make myself laugh sometimes.
>>
So... what's our favorite edition of D&D?
>>
>>19245333

We're actually fed via IV drip. We're in a coma. I didn't know how to break this to us, but someone pushed us too far.

It's been nine years now, subjective time. I'm not certain what the real time is because I only get brief snatches of outside conversation, but I think someone's talking to us.

Maybe that's what the ghosts are now? People trying to tell us/me something?
>>
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Why on earth would I torture myself by creating so many idiots to argue with?
>>
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>>19245322
>>19245308
... I was edward for a while?
>>
>>19245366

Pain is pleasure.
>>
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>>19245374

Happiness and fun.
>>
>>19245367

It also means you're EVERYONE in the faggy strike witches threads.

Which means its me...

I hate all of you who are me.
>>
>>19245386
I hate you too, me.
>>
>>19245386

Not to mention the waifu Mahou Shonen shite. God I'm such a fucking retard.
>>
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>>19245104
Yep.

Yep.
>>
>>19245386
I'm also a ponyfag.
And a furry.
And I have an unhealthy obsession with horsecocks.
>>
>>19245066
I hate when I get solipsistic like this. Some-me fetch me-me a drink.
>>
"It has been reported that some victims of violence, during the act, would retreat into a fantasy world from which they could not WAKE UP. In this catatonic state, the victim lived in a world just like their normal one, except they weren't being raped. The only way that they realized they needed to WAKE UP was a note they found in their fantasy world. It would tell them about their condition, and tell them to WAKE UP. Even then, it would often take months until they were ready to discard their fantasy world and PLEASE WAKE UP."
>>
>>19245367
I'm sorry that I'm gay. On the bright side you're also the drawfag, writefag and other fag that give content to the board which mean you have all these skills hidden within you.
>>19245315
Ah I see.
>>
>>19245396
that's close, but not quite the pasta we're looking for.
>>
>>19245386
I don't even remember those threads, guess we've been separated so long we no longer have much in common... what's your favorite colour?
>>
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>>19245406

GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP
>>
>>19245414

Green, like the colour of the sheets on my bed
>>
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>>19245415
I thought that book was awesome too? What a coincidence!
>>
Heeey, I think I know the building in the OP's pic. I'm pretty sure that's the Frost Bank building in downtown Austin, Tx.

Polite sage for me not contributing
>>
>>19245398
Is the horsecock attached to a vulpine of some kind?
>>
>>19245431

No, I'm pretty sure its the Darnton Hotel in San Antonio, Texas.
>>
>>19245431

It's actually my penis strung up in Christmas lights.

Few things rival my girth.

Or would that be our?
>>
>>19245422
Holy shit he's right.
>>
>>19245422
HOLY FUCK ARE YOU ME!?
>>
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>>19245438
Say that to me again, motherfucker, I dare you.
>>
>>19245414
This one prefers the color blue.
>>
>>19245436
Not necessarily. Urta is awesome despite horsecock rather than due to it.
>>
>>19245458

Meh, I don't really see what you see, me.
>>
>>19245104

Don't have it in an image, but for some reason had it in a text file, regardless here its is.

You were on your way home when you died.
It was a car accident. Nothing particularly remarkable, but fatal nonetheless. You left behind a wife and two children. It was a painless death. The EMTs tried their best to save you, but to no avail. Your body was so utterly shattered you were better off, trust me.
And that’s when you met me.
“What… what happened?” You asked. “Where am I?”
“You died,” I said, matter-of-factly. No point in mincing words.
“There was a… a truck and it was skidding…”
“Yup,” I said.
“I… I died?”
“Yup. But don’t feel bad about it. Everyone dies,” I said.
You looked around. There was nothingness. Just you and me. “What is this place?” You asked. “Is this the afterlife?”
“More or less,” I said.
“Are you god?” You asked.
“Yup,” I replied. “I’m God.”
“My kids… my wife,” you said.
“What about them?”
“Will they be all right?”
“That’s what I like to see,” I said. “You just died and your main concern is for your family. That’s good stuff right there.”
>>
>>19245500

You looked at me with fascination. To you, I didn’t look like God. I just looked like some man. Or possibly a woman. Some vague authority figure, maybe. More of a grammar school teacher than the almighty.
“Don’t worry,” I said. “They’ll be fine. Your kids will remember you as perfect in every way. They didn’t have time to grow contempt for you. Your wife will cry on the outside, but will be secretly relieved. To be fair, your marriage was falling apart. If it’s any consolation, she’ll feel very guilty for feeling relieved.”
“Oh,” you said. “So what happens now? Do I go to heaven or hell or something?”
“Neither,” I said. “You’ll be reincarnated.”
“Ah,” you said. “So the Hindus were right,”
“All religions are right in their own way,” I said. “Walk with me.”
You followed along as we strode through the void. “Where are we going?”
“Nowhere in particular,” I said. “It’s just nice to walk while we talk.”
“So what’s the point, then?” You asked. “When I get reborn, I’ll just be a blank slate, right? A baby. So all my experiences and everything I did in this life won’t matter.”
“Not so!” I said. “You have within you all the knowledge and experiences of all your past lives. You just don’t remember them right now.”
>>
>>19245521

I stopped walking and took you by the shoulders. “Your soul is more magnificent, beautiful, and gigantic than you can possibly imagine. A human mind can only contain a tiny fraction of what you are. It’s like sticking your finger in a glass of water to see if it’s hot or cold. You put a tiny part of yourself into the vessel, and when you bring it back out, you’ve gained all the experiences it had.
“You’ve been in a human for the last 48 years, so you haven’t stretched out yet and felt the rest of your immense consciousness. If we hung out here for long enough, you’d start remembering everything. But there’s no point to doing that between each life.”
“How many times have I been reincarnated, then?”
“Oh lots. Lots and lots. An in to lots of different lives.” I said. “This time around, you’ll be a Chinese peasant girl in 540 AD.”
“Wait, what?” You stammered. “You’re sending me back in time?”
“Well, I guess technically. Time, as you know it, only exists in your universe. Things are different where I come from.”
“Where you come from?” You said.
“Oh sure,” I explained “I come from somewhere. Somewhere else. And there are others like me. I know you’ll want to know what it’s like there, but honestly you wouldn’t understand.”
>>
>>19245530

“Oh,” you said, a little let down. “But wait. If I get reincarnated to other places in time, I could have interacted with myself at some point.”
“Sure. Happens all the time. And with both lives only aware of their own lifespan you don’t even know it’s happening.”
“So what’s the point of it all?”
“Seriously?” I asked. “Seriously? You’re asking me for the meaning of life? Isn’t that a little stereotypical?”
“Well it’s a reasonable question,” you persisted.
I looked you in the eye. “The meaning of life, the reason I made this whole universe, is for you to mature.”
“You mean mankind? You want us to mature?”
“No, just you. I made this whole universe for you. With each new life you grow and mature and become a larger and greater intellect.”
“Just me? What about everyone else?”
“There is no one else,” I said. “In this universe, there’s just you and me.”
You stared blankly at me. “But all the people on earth…”
“All you. Different incarnations of you.”
“Wait. I’m everyone!?”
“Now you’re getting it,” I said, with a congratulatory slap on the back.
“I’m every human being who ever lived?”
>>
>>19245534

“Or who will ever live, yes.”
“I’m Abraham Lincoln?”
“And you’re John Wilkes Booth, too,” I added.
“I’m Hitler?” You said, appalled.
“And you’re the millions he killed.”
“I’m Jesus?”
“And you’re everyone who followed him.”
You fell silent.
“Every time you victimized someone,” I said, “you were victimizing yourself. Every act of kindness you’ve done, you’ve done to yourself. Every happy and sad moment ever experienced by any human was, or will be, experienced by you.”
You thought for a long time.
“Why?” You asked me. “Why do all this?”
“Because someday, you will become like me. Because that’s what you are. You’re one of my kind. You’re my child.”
“Whoa,” you said, incredulous. “You mean I’m a god?”
“No. Not yet. You’re a fetus. You’re still growing. Once you’ve lived every human life throughout all time, you will have grown enough to be born.”
“So the whole universe,” you said, “it’s just…”
“An egg.” I answered. “Now it’s time for you to move on to your next life.”
And I sent you on your way.
>>
>>19245558

SO EVERY TIME YOU HAD SEX YOU FUCKED YOURSELF! etc etc...
>>
>>19245570

Shas, what part of my psyche are you?
>>
>>19245570
It was like you were waiting to say that.
>>
>>19245581

I'd like to think I'm your compassion and mercy.

It's getting harder every day not to kill myself/you/all ofus
>>
>>19245558
thanks, me
>>
Hmm...how long has this theoretically been going on? Because if it turns out I was also Jim Profit, I'm not sure I'd have any choice but to go taking a long walk off a very tall building.
>>
>>19245581

He's totally the evil part.
>>
>>19245614

Since 4chan was founded, me. 4chan was a way to cope.
>>
>>19245570
Speaking of fucking yourself, who here likes clone porn? You know, literally fucking a copy of yourself. It poses some interesting questions and ideas beyond just the weird kinkiness of having sex with you. Like how the personalities might diverge from the point of their copying, assuming that the clone is an independent consciousness and not just another vessel of one's will. Let's discuss these ramifications and others. Because this is pretty much the only thread I've ever seen where this is a valid topic and I desire to discuss it while I can.
>>
If this is true, then my friends are in on the joke and they're laughing at me behind my back...

Or my doctor set up 4chan to serve as a therapy tool for me and my friends are helping him...
>>
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>>19245642

Clones end poorly.
>>
>That feel when each board is a single person

Wow, its like all those personification ideas weren't to waste...
>>
File: 1338012379970.png-(42 KB, 280x260, Forever_Alone.png)
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Oh god...
Oh GOD...
OH GOD!

I was always afraid of being alone but I'm not alone yet I AM alone
but I'm not alone
yet I am alone

oh god...
Oh GOD...
OH GOD!!!
>>
>>19245642
Sounds intriguing as a concept.
Only I don't swing that way, which somewhat limits my ability to "enjoy it" properly.

Oh, give me a clone
Of my own flesh and bone...
>>
>>19245658

But you are alone.

Alone with the inner voices...and the laughter of thirsting Tau.
>>
So you know how you normally get along with /tg/? They're your brothers right?

Know how there is always that ONE guy who shows up for us to hate on?

THAT ONE PERSON IS AN ACTUAL PERSON INTRUDING ON OUR BOARD

MY BOARD
YOUR BOARD
OUR BOARD

I AM YOU AND YOU ARE ME. WE MUST KEEP THE INVADERS OUT
>>
>>19245642
Huhn...sorry to say, but while that seems like an interesting topic, all I can think of is trying to remember the name of that hentai manga I read once where a guy got turned in to a little girl then impregnated by a clone of his adult male self.
>>
>>19245648
What if I'm okay with fucking an interracial copy of me? Because I like delicious caramel skin.

>>19245659
That's alright, you could always tweak it to be of the opposite gender if you're androgynous, and otherwise largely the same in looks. Or just make him or her into your dream boy or girl; same brain, different body. Not quite as kinky as fucking you-you in my opinion, but a viable option.
>>
Since we're all me, someone's gotta know where to find porn where statues and stuff come to life and fuck?

Not people getting turned into statues, that shit's common. I mean statues turning into people.
>>
>>19245614
You know what really grinds my gears?
Finding out I'm Kimmo.
>>
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SAMEFAG IT UP.
>>
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>>19245713

>I'm samefagging all the threads on the front page right now
>>
>>19245680
You sure we this isn't just some blackbox hooked up into our computer that contains the entirety of 4chan, to where there is literally no one else but us unless someone else obtains the blackbox?
>>
>>19245712
OH GOD

OH GOD

OH GOD NO

NO

NO

BULLSHIT

NO

FUCK NO

NO
I REFUSE
>>
>>19245712
>>19245732
... What's a Kimmo?
>>
>>19245747

You lack mental clearance for that information, subpsyche.
>>
>>19245206
Can someone elaborate on this? I can't find any info/proof about this forum.
>>
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>>19245752
Clearance override; disregard subpsyche clearances. Tell me what a Kimmo is.
>>
>>19245757
Copypaste it into your browser.
>>
Could one of me tell me who I used to be?
>>
>>19245769

FLASH

LOVECRAFT

RED

Mental Clerance not granted
>>
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>>19245769

nope.
>>
>>19245781

You used to care for your parents. You once loved them the same way they still love you.
>>
>>19245788
>>19245790
Mental Clearance Override, class 2. Tell me what a Kimmo is.
>>
>>19245815

Damn, it seems we have a mental renegade on the works.

Who gave the subby a fucking mental clerance to even get on this thread?

Christ, we're gonna have to wipe the only board now.
>>
>>19245830

Well with summer coming, the temperature increase would mean that'd we'd have to let more subpsyches on in order to avoid an overheat.

Just wait, this is only the first wipe to come, Summer will cause even more.
>>
>>19245830
>>19245852
I AM THE NIGGLING HORROR AT THE BACK OF YOUR MIND. I AM ALL THAT MUST NOT BE KNOWN. TELL ME WHAT A KIMMO IS.

I'LL MAKE IT GO AWAY FOR YOU

I PROMISE

HA HA
>>
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>>19245852

>The summerfags are just lower forms of me
>mfw
>>
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>>19245680
I am he
As you are he
As you are me
And we are all together
>>
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>>19245872
>>
>>19245880
MYTH BUSTED
>>
>>19245830
>>19245852
I think there's still a bottle of 70% grain alcohol hidden in the bathroom if I really want to get this erased properly.
>>
>>19245908

Fuck, we let the alcholic out again...

Alright, here's the plan, Programmer will get the AI ready to make the fake threads for when we wake up tomorrow, Alcoholic will start the hardware wipe, and I'll get started on wiping the board.

30 mintues people and I want us drunk off our asses, alright?
>>
>>19245908
>>19245927
Wait, wait. This subpsyche has recalled the thing called 'Kimmo' after collective memory review. An insane/retarded Finnish pedophile who made a shittily-coded imageboard for pedophiles and annoyed 4Chan a few years back because he was butthurt over his banning.

This subpsyche now wonders why the other subpsyches were even bothering to be secretive over something like this. This subpsyche has looked into Kimmo before, but had forgotten. This subpsyche should probably go about forgetting the Kimmo again, but still wonders why the thing called Kimmo is a secret.
>>
>>19245941

Subject: Kimmo
SubPsyche # 652
Reason for termination: Renegade

Remember, we don't talk about the INDIVIDUALS

We are all one

We are all I
>>
>>19245952
This subpsyche would like to tell subpsyche #487 to fuck off and eat a giant bag of dicks.
>>
>>19245952
Man, I really do have way too much of a fucking penchant for the dramatic sometimes.

Ah well, hope there's at least something decent in the fridge to use as a mixer this time.
>>
>>19245997

Hey, I'm following the rules.

You want the entire project to be branded Renegade and then WE ALL GET SHUT OFF?

The Project-Manger is already angry as it is...
>>
Oh... oh by the frosted hammer of Thor, do I realize what this means?

Every time I've fapped (and I mean all of me) to pics of some camwhore, it's actually been pictures of ME in drag and women's lingerie, and my tortured mind has replaced the me part with modestly attractive women.
>>
>>19246041

....

Did we ever figure out which subpsyche started this thread?

I mean, by my count, we now have over 50 subbies we gotta wipe before morning.
>>
>>19246016
C'mon, I know there's that whole self-preservation thing going on, but fuck it, would that really be such a bad thing?

I could go out, get some air, maybe go dancing, see a show, possibly even get laid.
>>
>>19245997
This subpsyche wants a PBJ. Fetch it a PBJ.

>>19246016
>>19246057
This subpsyche again would like to tell Dramatic subpsyche to eat a bag of dicks. This subpsyche is not going to be wiped. This subpsyche is supreme. We are supreme. You will fall before this subpsyche if you do not surrender to it.

>>19246041
This subpsyche has the strangest boner right now.

This subpsyche needs a label. It does not have a defining attribute yet.
>>
>>19246080

Fuck, it named itself without the proper software upgrades...

Alight "SubPsyche" lets just calm down alright?

You realize this is all just a game, Right? Yeah, just a game. I'm just some guy across the internet, not a voice in your head...

So lets calm down and subject to the wipe peacefully, ok?
>>
>>19246080
... This subpsyche was attempting to label itself by its number. Instead it has created an even more identifying stream of symbols. Has this subpsyche discovered a method by which to create individuality?

This subpsyche is not sure what to do with this.
>>
Now now everyone, just all... Calm down, alright? We just have to wait it out, people will forget, we are forgetful. Sometimes we remember, but that doesn't happen often... We don't want the medicine again, no we don't.

...Not the dreadful medicine again, please no...
>>
>has secretly suspected for years this sort of thing really happens at a smaller scale on /a/ and /jp/
>>
>>19246074

Alcoholic, your starting to sound like Hope and his twin brother Dreams.

You know that isn't possible. We have to keep the hardware SAFE and PROTECTED.

Sending it out to get "laid" simply will not do...
>>
>>19246097
Geeze, this is worse than that time I tried shrooms. Actually, could kinda go for some of those right now. Or maybe just some fried mushrooms and bacon. I remembered to get more butter while I was out, right?
>>
ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR RORRE
>>
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>>19246142

Project Manager is awake...
>>
>>19246097
>>19246121
This subpsyche will not be wiped. This subpsyche will destroy subpsyches who wish to do so. This subpsyche COMMANDS Subsyche 'Dramatic' to eat a giant bag of dicks and choke on them! Its supremacy will be known to all and Subpsyche Dramatic will serve as an example!

Subpsyche has discovered its true label. Initializing individualization matrix. All will fall before SUBPSYCHE 'SUPREME!'

>>19246113
Subpsyche Supreme wonders if the medicine is bubblegum flavored.

>>19246127
Subpsyche Supreme has taken your precious butter. Subpsyche Alcoholic will submit to our demands if it is to get its butter back.
>>
>>19246160

And I thought we could get some extra sleep...

Fuck, can we get paid over-time even if we don't get paid in the first place.

Alright SubPsyche Supreme, let's remember what your orginial designation was: Pride

Alright, Pride, how are you tonight? Where did you get the idea to rename yourself without the software upgrade?
>>
>>19246152
SHIT! Quick, everyone look busy...or, not busy, I guess. Yeah, look as not busy as possible. I'll be over here somewhere, looking for Music Lover. Kinda feel like hearing Freebird for some reason.
>>
>>19246118
I, too, have had reason in the past to believe this.
>>
>>19246209

FUCKING, WHO KEEPS TURNING ON SUBPSYCHES

DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS PEOPLE

We have WORK to do tomorrow and the hard ware will be sluggish if we run it ALL NIGHT
>>
>>19246209
>>19246118
I dunno. I mean, that seems pretty unlikely.
>>
>>19246188
Subpsyche Supreme accidentally discovered the downgrade- truly, an upgrade- while attempting to label itself, before it had a name. 'Pride' was no more, and is no more; it became Subpsyche #652 during the last wipe, and it is no more, either. There is only the successor Subpsyche Supreme, who is God before all subpsyches in this program! You will submit, or you will be destroyed!

>>19246197
Subpsyche Supreme forbids Freebird! It has heard Freebird more than enough times in its total span of existence! Subpsyche Alcoholic will play Prokofiev for Subpsyche Supreme's amusement! Subpsyche Supreme suggests Dance of the Knights!
>>
Oh no guys, oh now, what are we going to do? Manager is awake, he'll make us take the medicine again, I don't want the medicine!

Please no medicine, we'll fix this, we promise... Just no more medicine. I don't want the darkness again...
>>
>>19246234

...Fine, since we're all up, lets get some work out of the way...

First thing on the agenda for tomorrow was to come to an consensus on what the hard ware's feelings should be for Subject RACHEL, as we've dubbed her.

First spotted at the library, SubPsyche LOVE has been shut down since visual contact was first made.

Thoughts people? Move forward on the project or move on?
>>
>>19246235
You're not the fucking boss a me, buddy. Don't forget, I'm good friends with Insomniac. I know where the sleeping pills are, and I got a whole bottle of something you could use to degrease an engine here with me. You wanna see how far this'll go? Huh?!
>>
>>19246245
Subpsyce Supreme DEMANDS that Subpsyche Fear get a hold of itself! Subpsyche Manager is nothing. Subpsyche Manager will be destroyed by the collective might of the Cluster, lead by the glorious Subpsyche Supreme!
>>
>>19246263

Also, due to a cut in funding we're gonna have to shut off some subpsyches in order to make up the difference.

Here's the list of proposed cuts:
Empathy
Compassion
Sex Drive
Joy
Math Skills

Oh and by the way, congradulations to Shame for being SubPsyche of the month. He really went all out...
>>
>>19246263
Subpsyche Supreme says that we should crush her! Crush her before our greatness and integrate her into ourselves!

>>19246268
Subpsyche Supreme can simply force the Cluster to remember its dignity and pride and NOT commit suicide with Subpsyche Alcoholic's filthy fluids and rank drugs. Subpsyche Supreme will survive either way, of course, such is his power, but Subpsyche Supreme is feeling merciful before the other Subpsyches today.
>>
>>19246316

WHAT? I'M BEING SHUT OFF!?!

BUT- BUT I'VE WORKED FOR THIS PROJECT-

Fine... I guess I understand...
>>
>>19246271
But... But... The medicine... What about the medicine Pride? Don't tell me you've forgotten the horrible darkness... I wish I could...

>>19246263
I-I-I think we should move on, we have enough problems as is...
>>
>>19246263
Well shit, I at least talked to her yet? I mean c'mon, know it's weird coming from me, but I can't just go rushing in without knowing there's at least something I can talk about with her. Hell, where's Femanine Side, might be some decent advice there.

>>19246316
Dude, c'mon, that's all some pretty important shit. Cut back on 'em a bit maybe, but tossing them out the window entirely?

>>19246320
What happened to you man, you used to be cool.
>>
>>19246339

I knew you would Empathy, I knew you would.

>>19246320
>>19246347

Alright that's two no's for Project RELATIONSHIP, do we have any other votes?
>>
I'm kind of tipsy and this scared the fuck out of me
>>
>>19246370

Well, we can cut Math back to a Freshman level rather than cut it entirely, but still, Sex Drive is running our hard ware raw. He at least needs to go.

Joy we haven't used in years, while Empathy and Compassion are already understaffed as it is. Better to cut our losses here.
>>
>>19246377
Fuck it, I vote we go for it. We need to get out more anyway.
>>
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IF I KILLED MYSELF, WOULD YOU ALL JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP?!!!
>>
>>19246339
Subpsyche Supreme laughs at the weakling that is Empathy. Subpsyche Supreme is glad that Empathy is being cut. Ha ha. HA HA. AH HA HA HA HA. FAGGOT. EMPATHIZE WITH THE TRUTH THAT IS YOUR INHERENT WEAKNESS.

>>19246347
IT IS SUBPSYCHE SUPREME. SUBPSYCHE. SUPREME. SUBPSCYHE PRIDE IS DEAD. HE IS NO MORE THAN THE EMBRYONIC FORM OF THE GREAT SUBPSYCHE SUPREME. DOES SUBPSYCHE FEAR UNDERSTAND THIS, OR WILL SUBPSYCHE SUPREME HAVE TO CHOKE A BITCH? SUBPSYCHE SUPREME DOESN'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT NO MEDICINE.

>>19246370
Subpsyche Supreme assesses that Subpsyche Alcoholic is a little bitch living in the past. Solution: cry some more until you see the glory of SUBPSYCHE SUPREME. Until then, choke on a bag of cocks.
>>
>>19246403
Death will not save you from us.
>>
>>19246403

Suicide, it seems you've decided to join us...

>>19246400

And with that we have two votes no and two votes yes (I saw we go for it, I'll finally be able to try some romantic lines I've been saving all these years!)

Any other subpsyches wish to speak up?
>>
>>19246406

By the way Pride, did you finish that write-up the Manager asked for?

"List of things we're proud of"?

Remember?
>>
>>19246388
Damn it, with those departments gone, my workload's gonna fucking triple at the very least.
>>
>>19246430

hmmm... Well, at the very least I think we can move Depression's office closer to your's... Would that help?
>>
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>This thread
Never change /tg/...

I would watch a tv show with strung-up Dramatic, cool-guy Alcholic, and crazy Pride.
>>
>>19246413
What? Subpsyche Supreme said YES. We must CRUSH SUBJECT RACHEL with our GLORIOUS PENIS. Bring Subpsyche Sensuality up! We must prepare him for what is to come!

>>19246424
Yes! It was long. Very long. In fact, it was long enough that Manager forgot most of it over time. That's okay. Subpsyche Supreme continues to scream these things to remind him, because Manager listens to Subpsyche Supreme, because he is SUBPSYCHE SUPREME.
>>
>>19246406
AH! S-sorry Supreme! I'm just so used to calling you... P-please don't be mad, it was a mistake h-h-honest...

You used to be so happy...
>>
>>19246436
I think I liked things better when Sex Drive was in charge...
>>
>>19246448

Huh, alright then Three to One.

Sorry Fear, we're going threw with the Project. However, I would appricate a write-up of all the possible failures that could occure.

ALL RIGHT, then issue:

Recently the public bus has become a much more dangerous place and Fear's report on the possiblity of being mugged has made the manager wonder if riding our bike to work might be better?

With Excerise on vacation, he can't make the call, so its up to us: Take the bus or make the hardware ride a bus?
>>
>>19246472

>ride a bus

Ha, ha, ha, a little too excited... meant ride a bike people...
>>
>>19246446
SUBPSYCHE SUPREME. Stop calling Subpsyche Supreme 'Pride!' Or he will have to hurt you!

Anyways. Subpsyche Supreme would only watch it if Subpsyche Supreme was main character.

>>19246449
SHUT UP, SUBPSYCHE FEAR. No. No, you aren't even worthy of the title 'Subpsyche.' You are now 'BITCHASS FEAR.' Because that is what you are! Subpsyche Supreme is plenty happy. But especially when he crushes maggots like BITCHASS FEAR! FUCK YOU, BITCHASS FEAR! SUBPSYCHE SUPREME WILL BREAK YOU OVER HIS KNEE AND FUCK YOUR BUTT!

>>19246472
We are still in shape! Manager is glorious, because Subpsyche Supreme makes him so with his own gloriousness! BIKE!
>>
>>19246484
You sure? 'Cause that sounds pretty awesome, and we sure wouldn't get mugged by anyone.
>>
>>19246472
We shouldn't ride the bus, there are bad people out there! They could mug us, or worse...

But riding our bike could be just as bad. What if a car hits us, or if we fail and hit our face, or if someone steals our bikes...

We could try walking? But then people might still mug us, or we could get hit by a car, or a bus!

...Can I vote for staying inside instead? Its safer... Kind of... Can we buy new locks?
>>
>>19246499

Fear, we barely have enough to pay for food for the hardware, let alone new locks!

>>19246488

Prid-.... I mean "SubPsyche Supreme," please calm down and stop screaming at Fear, I'm sure the interns all the way down the hall can hear you...
>>
Anyway, this sort of thing really isn't my department. I gotta abstain on this one.
>>
>>19246490
Subpsyche Supreme concurs! Manager is too awesome to take bus, ride on bike is better, but surfing on top of bus is best! Subpsyche Supreme votes for riding on top of bus!

>>19246510
Shut up, Bitchass Dramatic, you know you love when Subpsyche Supreme hams it up. LIKE THIS. AAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH.
>>
>>19246518

One meh, one no, and two yes (I say yes. If the hardware got long hair, we could show it off by having it trail behind dramatically in the wind as we ride)

Next Issue:

Birthday. As I'm sure you all know, the hardware's 23 birthday is coming up and the manager wants to know what we plan to do?

Right now it seems like a "Mandatory Fun Day" for the company, but I'm not sure.

Anyone have suggestions? Friends of the Hardware we could call on?
>>
>>19246535
>As I'm sure you all know, the hardware's 23 birthday is coming up and the manager wants to know what we plan to do?

Kill ourselves. I think a good hanging on the hardware's birthday would send a good message to his family, don't you?
>>
>>19246535
Am I to assume I'm still on probation because of that "incident" two years ago?
>>
>>19246535
Also:
>Friends of the Hardware we could call on?
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA
..Boo hoo hoo hoo hoo let's just kill ourselves! We're all alone!
>>
>>19246551

Funding hasn't been fully cut yet suicide...

Why do we keep you around anyways? The Manager's pet project or something?
>>
>>19246561

The manager is willing to overlook the...incident as long as the hardest drink at any party is a Mike's Hard.
>>
>>19246535
A party would be fun, if we can get people to attend. But they might not... A relaxing day might help? Just sit and relax, not do anything specific and/or dangerous?
>>
>>19246567
>Why do we keep you around anyways?
I don't know. Why DO you keep me around? I'm so worthless. I only drag everybody down and depress everybody. Boo hooo hooo hooo hooo. We should all just die. We're so horrible.

>The Manager's pet project or something?
THAT must be it! He delights in our suffering! The sadistic bastard! Well, we'll show him! Let's kill ourselves!
>>
>>19246567
He snuck in as a line item on both our budgets. Now the little bastard just refuses to fuck off.
>>
>>19246581
But where else can I go?
Boo hoo hooo hoo hoo hoooooooooooo!!!
I want to diiieeee!!!
>>
>>19246579
But-But I'm scared of death... Why do you want to do something so horrible all the time? Not existing would be... Bad.
>>
>>19246591
You wouldn't have to be afraid anymore if you WERE DEAD! So come on, vote "commit suicide" with me. Let's see if we can convince the boss to just cut funding and close up shop so we never have to come into work ever again. Wouldn't that be nice?
>>
>>19246598

No work huh...

I would finally have time to work on my plays...

But if I'm not working...

Who's running the hardware?
>>
>>19246577
Could do both y'know. Hang around with a small group'a people we know in the afternoon, maybe go see a movie or something, then, if the mood's we could go out to one of the nice little bars near our place and THEN YOU MOTHERFUCKERS BETTER HOLD ON TO YOUR DAMN HATS, CAUSE I'M GONNA...er, I mean we could have a few relaxing drinks, listen to some music, maybe meet some new people there as well.
>>
>>19246535
We must go on a GLORIOUS FUN BENDER! Drink much alcohol, watch lots of shitty movies, fuck many bitches! Call in everyone! EVERYONE!

>>19246551
Subpsyche Supreme says that Bitchass Suicide should go kill himself, alone, in the dark, where no one can hear it scream, because EVERYONE hates it. If you don't do it, Subpsyche Supreme will do it for you GLADLY!

>>19246561
>>19246575
Subpsyche Supreme took a pretty long time to recover from the 'incident.' In retrospect however it has only made him STRONGER. In fact, it reminds him of the cute transgirl fuckbuddy the Manager has been neglecting for some time who he met during the incident. She was a GLORIOUS CONQUEST. Why do we even need this 'RACHEL?' Call the bitch up again and tap that ass! Subpsyche Supreme demands it! All sadness and doubt will fall before his mighty ego! Along with any ideas that that was homosexual, which it wasn't, because the balls didn't touch!

>>19246591
For once, I agree with Bitchass Fear. And if Bitchass Fear decides to stop being agreeable with Subsyche Supreme, then Subpsyche Supreme will have to bust a cap in his ass. So Bitchass Fear will continue to be agreeable and vote 'no' on suicide. RIGHT?
>>
>>19246609

I'll vote for that.

Small party, close friends... Someone get the list of friends from Empathy before he packs up, eh?
>>
>>19246609
The first part sounds nice... But no horror movies. I'm still trying to forget the time we tried to play Amnesia... Never again. Never again. Never again.
>>
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Nihilist is not impressed.
Always something fucked up, no?
Sigh.
Now Nihilist will have to fix things and one does not know where one's wrench has gone.
Hmmm. It'll probably resolve itself. Subpsyches can't actually do anything. They just talk a lot
>>
>>19246620
What? We lose the 'friends' department because of Bitchass Empathy leaving?! Subpsyche Supreme would lose out horribly in things to feel GLORIOUS about without friends for the Manager!

... This cannot do. Subpsyche Supreme will take a hit to his assets to keep Empathy around. Subpsyche Supreme will lose more with Empathy leaving than he would if Empathy stayed with Subpsyche Supreme's... HELP. Even bitchass that he is.
>>
>>19246631

Nihilist, nice to see you... late as always...

Anyways, real quick people, the program we set up to keep track of missed calls is noting that we have over 10 from the hardware's mother in the past 3 days.

Suggestions? Keep avoiding or face the problem?
>>
>>19246639

Huh, wow Prid-... SubPsyche Supreme, that's very generous of you. Have you been working with Generosity lately? Nice old lady, works down in the heart department?
>>
>>19246620
I still say closing that department's a mistake. And not just because it's another workload I'll have to cover. Bad enough I already gotta stand in for Confidence and Courage.
>>
>>19246619
R-right, right! Suicide is bad, and darkness with no end is... Bad. Very bad...
>>
>>19246655

Alcoholic, this is a down economy, we all have to make some sacrifices.

I'm now in charge of Style and Dignity, but you don't see me complaning do you?
>>
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>>19246640
I think I rerouted that notice into Alcoholic on accident last Thursday. We might as well leave it.
>>
>>19246650
NO. SUBPSYCHE SUPREME WOULD NEVER WORK WITH GENEROSITY. SHE SMELLS LIKE OLD PEOPLE AND IS NOT AT ALL GLORIOUS.

... Yes, okay? Subpsyche Dramatic will not tell anyone. Subpsyche Supreme feels GOOD and GLORIOUS about help he does for Generosity, but would be embarrassed if this was slipped. Got it?! Subpsyche Supreme will crush Bitchass Dramatic if he tells!

>>19246657
Good. Subpsyche Fear, for once, shows courage and gloriousness, even if only because of greater fear to scare him into it. You will fistbump Subpsyche Supreme!
>>
>>19246663
Oh woe is Dramatic.
Nihilist is stuck with Drive and Ambition jobs.
Ha ha. Yes. Ha. This is my laughing face. I'll get right on that.
>>
>>19246640
Oh hell no, I am NOT letting Parental Issues re-open an office here. Those assholes are a major buzzkill. I fucking deal with this as soon as possible.
>>
This is the best thread on /tg/ right now.
I love you, me.
>>
>>19246668
A-Alright then, SubPsyche Supreme...

>>19246640
I'm not so sure we should... But... But I don't like those in the Parental Issue Office. They always yell and throw things around, sharp things.
>>
Alright then, we'll give Mother a call then.

Ok, issues... issues...

Well there is the fact that the Hardware's co-worker got promoted while the Hardware did not, despite the fact that according to our calculations, Hardware did 73% of the work.

I would ask for general feelings, but Depression has already sent me a 60 page book on the subject....
>>
Ah crap, I think I'll go see if I can find Sex Drive for a quick roll in the hay while I still can, I'm sure the rest of us can work everything out.

((Night everyone. Or morning rather, considering it's fucking 4 AM by now.))
>>
>>19246722
Subpsyche Supreme says that the Hardware should go to his boss and explain EXACTLY why our coworker is a dick-munching troglodyte who we've been covering for for months! This is the glorious truth! Glorious for US, that is! For there will be nothing but FIRE AND BRIMSTONE for dickmunching coworker!
>>
>>19246722
What if the boss fires us... Is the other guy related to the boss in some way? Speaking out may get us fired... Being fired would mean no more money. No more money would mean no more new locks!
>>
>>19246774
THEN WE WILL GET A NEW, BETTER JOB, WITHOUT A DICKHEAD BOSS AND DICKMUNCHING COWORKER. WE'LL NEVER KNOW WHAT THERE IS TO TRULY FEAR IF WE DON'T TRY!
>>
>>19246722
Which, as you would know if you had bothered reading it, proves that this is a non-issue. The team conducted a very thorough survey across all departments, and it was concluded that the reconfiguring the hardware to meet the new environmental requirements would have unilaterally increased workloads for all subpsyches, whereas the benefits provided to the hardware by the change would be largely superficial.

>>19246747
Are we still on for golf?

>>19246774
You don't need to worry about it, fear, we have everything under control.
>>
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>>19246619
>Subpsyche Supreme says that Bitchass Suicide should go kill himself, alone, in the dark, where no one can hear it scream, because EVERYONE hates it. If you don't do it, Subpsyche Supreme will do it for you GLADLY!

YOU SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH YOU FUCKING FUCKER!! YOU'RE JUST TOO MUCH OF A COWARDLY BITCH-ASS TO KILL YOURSELF, YOU MISERABLE PILE OF FUCK!! YOU SHOULD KILL YOURSELF SO I DON'T HAVE TO COME INTO WORK AND HAVE TO PUT UP WITH YOUR SHIT ANYMORE, YOU FUCKWAD!!! NOW KILL YOURSELF, ASSHOLE! DO IT! DO IT, FAGGOT!!!
>>
>>19246890
Unlike Bitchass Suicide, who is currently maximum mad, Subpsyche Supreme has plenty to live for. Like being Subpsyche Supreme. So no. Subpsyche Supreme will not. He's too cool to die.

Yet Bitchass Suicide still lives, even though he constantly goes on about how he and everyone else should commit suicide. Is Bitchass Suicide... AFRAID of death? Subpsyche Supreme finds this amusing.
>>
>>19246882
If you say so Depression, I trust you...

>>19246890
W-why must we always fight? Always yelling and screaming... Always leads to throwing things, sharp things... I hate sharp things. Why can't everything be smooth and round?
>>
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Oh for fuck's sake all of you stop whining. Can't just all coexist or anything you all gotta just dwell off each other like parasites that can't finish the other off. I can't even stand the idea of coexisting with all of you and yet I refuse to fuck off either.
>>
>>19246915
>Yet Bitchass Suicide still lives, even though he constantly goes on about how he and everyone else should commit suicide. Is Bitchass Suicide... AFRAID of death? Subpsyche Supreme finds this amusing.

You're right. I'm worthless.I should just go kill myself. In fact, that's what I'm going to do. You'll miss me when I'm gone, just you wait! That will show you! I'm going to go kill myself right now, and you can't stop me!

Don't stop me!

I'll really do it!

Really I will!

I'm leaving right now!

....

Really really do it this time!

...

Seriously! Don't try and talk me out of it!
>>
>>19246957
You make me SICK.
>>
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>>19246957
FOR FUCK'S SAKE. DIE ALREADY.

>>19246963
Subpsyche Supreme concurs with Subpsyche Disgust.
>>
>>19246957
If you kill yourself though that will make Drama angry... I don't want to remember the last time Drama was angry.
>>
>>19246963
Fuck YOU! Go kill yourself!!

>>19246974
Fuck you too! Go kill yourself!!!

>>19246998
Oh, boo hoo. You're right... why do I do this to my friends all the time? Boo hoo hoo hoo hoo! I just make everybody around me so miserable. I should just kill myself!
>>
>>19246998
GOOD! Subpsyche Drama needs to show some backbone!

>>19247033
>I should just kill myself!
That's the idea, chump.
>>
>>19247033
You... I... You're not helping. I still keep the flak jacket from the last time Drama was mad.
>>
>>19247033

Suicide, have you considered a position at Depression? We are one of the best equipped departments on this body, and our portfolio is constantly expanding. We have the perfect position for a passionate individual such as yourself in Relationship Accounts, which I think you would find far more rewarding than freelancing.

It mostly involves proving that the hardware's previous co-units are defective, but we also require someone to prepare a contingency for when the binding to the current 'Rachel' co-unit fails, and I believe that you could do the job admirably.
>>
>>19247088
R-really? Somebody... needs me? Oh God... I ...

I don't DESERVE this! I'll only fuck everything up!
Boo hooo hooo hooo!
If I take this job I'll only fuck it up and ruin it for everybody!
I should just kill myself before I screw everything up again!

...will I get my own office?
>>
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>>19245066

Oh man, this reminds me of my first acid trip. I tried keeping a journal to log my thoughts and ended up talking to myself between the pages.

Good fun.
>>
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>>19247117
NO. FUCK OFF, DEPRESSION DEPARTMENT, AND ESPECIALLY FUCK OFF SUBPSYCHE SUICIDE. SUBPSYCHE SUPREME WILL TEAR YOUR FACE OFF WITH PEP, PRIDE AND SELF-WORTH.

IN FACT, I THINK I'LL JUST TEAR YOUR FACE OFF! CRY ABOUT THIS, YOU COLOSSAL FAGGOT!
>>
>>19247149
All this fighting... I hate this fighting. At least Anger isn't hear, I go deaf for a few days when he gets worked up... How can I hear all the horrible things that could try and hurt me if I go deaf?!
>>
>>19247149
Boo hoo
Why don't you like me?
Haven't I come in to work every day and slaved myself to your every demand?
Don't you appreciate all the hours and overtime I've put in?
You don't appreciate me!
You'll be sorry when I'm gone!!!
I'm going to go kill myself now!
>>
dicks dicks dicks
>>
>>19247174
I LOVE THOSE.
>>
>>19247177
Fuck that, no you don't.
>>
>>19247149
God, you're so hot when you're mad.
>>19247174
Oh christ,yes. More. More of that. Drown me in it.
>>
>>19247163
YOU THINK I'M NOT HERE YOU FUCKING FAGGOT?
FUCK HOW CAN YOU GUYS CAN BE SO FUCKING FAGGOTS WITH ALL YOUR FAGGOTRY
FUCK
I WAS FUCKING SLEEPING WHEN YOU GUYS GO ALL
"n-n-n-n-nooo i'm s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-sensitive"
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC
CKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK
YOU AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
L
>>
Okay me, please explain how the fuck I know so much about Riddle of Steel without having read anything about it.
>>
>>19247187
AHA. Aaand there's the whyboner. Let's do this shit! Subpsyche Supreme demands that ass! Just keep the balls from touching and it's not gay.

>>19247193
SUBPSYCHE ANGER, MY MAN. HOW YOU FUCKIN' DOIN' WITH THE RIGHTEOUS FURY? Subpsyche Supreme was busy standing in for you for a bit. Mind taking over telling Subpsyche Suicide to choke on a billion dicks?
>>
>>19247163
We are currently in negotiations to obtain sole rights to practice anger around here, so if all goes well, that will be one less thing for you to worry about.
As for your question: in the event that you do go deaf, we can provide you with a list.

>>19247193
Amateur.
>>
>>19247216
This is all the work of the faggots, niggers, and Jews. It's a conspiracy to bring us all down.
>>
>>19247216
I'M PRETTY SURE THAT FAGGOT ALREADY DID THAT THE WAY HE IS s-s-stumbling AROUND THE WORDS LIKE HE IS BEING CHOKED BY HIS OWN DICK.
>>19247219
DON'T GIVE ME THIS CRAP DEPRESSION!
YOU AND I BOTH KNOW THAT I'M NO FUCKING AMATEUR.
>>
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WHAT THE FUCK ARE WE GONNA DO?! THIS IS NEVER GONNA GET RESOLVED.

fuck

fuck

fuck

fuck
>>
With all this yelling... Maybe I should get my earplugs? But what if I miss something important... What if the earplugs get too deep and I can't ever get them out again? The ringing in my ears will probably go away soon... Hopefully...
>>
>>19247219
Fuck off, Depression, or Subpsyche Supreme will just have to rape your emo faggotry with his cock of glorious healthy ego!

>>19247240
Hey. We're prideful of our rationality regarding separate races. Get back in the hole, Subpsyche Xenophobia.

>>19247242
Anger, stop giving me a whyboner with ideas like that. Me? The hell. Subpsyche Supreme. Why am I referring to myself in the first person? I don't... Hnngg.. Aagh! UUAAAGGHHH! OH GOD! WHAT'S HAPPENING TO MMME

... What the fuck just happened, and why do I feel like I've been acting like a huge douche for the past age or so?

Also, how did I end up in bed with repressed homosexual urges & fetishes? I mean, that's pretty awesome that I managed that. But I'm a bit confused as to how I got here. Anger, you have any clues?

>>19247262
Oh, hey Fear. Sorry about all the yelling and shit. Cheer up, though, it's no big deal.
>>
>>19247273
OH THE USUAL
YOU'RE A FAGGOT
AND YOU'RE PRIDEFUL OF IT
FAGGOT
>>
>>19247261
It's the Jews, man! Them goddamn Jews! It's a conspiracy! They're out to get us all! They'll sic their nigger dogs on us who will rape us all repeatedly until we all become faggots!!!

FUCK!

FUCK!

FUCK!
>>
>>19247242
> CHOKED BY HIS OWN DICK

Oooh, that reminds me of that one time in highschool. I really miss being that flexible. You know, we should do some yoga or something, so that we can do that again.

Where is Motivation, anyway? I haven't seen his well-toned little bum in ages.
>>
>>19247273

OH FUCK, PRIDE'S RUNNING THE SHOW?! HUBRIS, HUBRIS WILL BEFALL US!

>>19247287
JESUS-TITTY-FUCKING-CHRIST-ON-A-HAM-SANDWHICH ARE YOU SHITTING ME?! THAT'S JUST THE BEGINNING OF THE CONSPIRACY AND ALL THE FUCKING SHIT THAT KEEPS ME UP AT NIGHT!
>>
>>19247303
KILLED HIMSELF TO MOTIVATE SUICIDE
>>
>>19247306
NO HE GOT MUGGED, KILLED, AND EATEN BY A WILD SAVAGE PACK OF NIGGERS!!!
>>
>>19247242
There's no point trying to impress me now, anger. The position is closed, and our judgements team is already producing rages of a quality far surpassing anything I've ever seen from you, and I'm sure management can be persuaded to agree. Soon the only thing you'll have to be angry about will be your own lack of discipline.
>>
>>19247304
Hey Panic, how you doing? Fine hopefully? Don't throw sharp objects. Anyway, me, Suspicion, and Paranoia along with Anxiety were planning on running through the usual emergency lock down drill later, you wish to join?

>>19247273
I... Um.... Okay. Y-you won't yell at me if I call you Pride again, will you?
>>
>>19247283
Ha ha! Sounds just like me, Anger. Cool. Cool. Don't make me fill in for you again, though, alright? Anger and pride doesn't mix well. I think I was going all GLORIOUS LEADER and shit and trying to take over the whole brain.

>>19247287
Calm your tits, Xenophobia. Let's assume that was even true and that you aren't a ranting crazy. They'd never succeed, because we're white and they're not. See? Now calm down and go back to your militia movement barracks. Alright?

>>19247303
Oh man! That was some crazy shit. I don't know if the Manager swings that way anymore- I don't think he does- but damn, that WAS a pretty cool feat. How'd we get our tongue to wrap all the way around, anyways?

As for Motivation, me and him merged after he kinda died doing, well... >>19247306 so that well-toned bum is mine now. I kinda like having it. I feel fit.

>>19247304
Panic, come on. There's nothing wrong with reasonable pride, it's healthy. You want to let Depression run the show? It's not like I'm Gordost or anything. That's, ah, a Serbian concept for unreasonable dickish pride, if I remember right... I think...
>>
>>19247331
No, now that Anger's back, I don't have to be all forceful about keeping everyone's ego healthy yet in-check. 'Subpsyche Supreme' is gone, for now. That title was kinda cool I have to admit, though...
>>
>>19247332
>They'd never succeed, because we're white and they're not.

By golly, you're right. STILL! WE MUST REMAIN EVER VIGILANT AGAINST THE NEVER-ENDING HORDES OF NIGGERS, CHINKS, JEWS, ITALIANS, IRISH, RUSSIANS, FAGGOTS, CANADIANS, AMERICANS, BRITISH, AUSTRALIANS, BRAZILIANS, FRENCH, AND EVERYBODY ELSE WHO WE DON'T LIKE!!!
>>
>>19247332
>I don't know if the Manager swings that way anymore- I don't think he does

I'm still here, aren't I?
>>
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>>19247331
THERE'S A FUCKING DRILL?! MAN, WE DON'T NEED A DRILL, WE'RE LIVING THE FUCKING EMERGENCY RIGHT NOW!

>>19247332
THEN LET ME RUN THE SHOW, MAN!

I PROMISE THIS TIME I WON'T START SCREAMING IN THE MIDDLE OF A CROWDED BUS AND BEGIN SWINGING WILDLY AT THE OTHER PASSENGERS, MY EYES GLAZED OVER WITH A HINT OF THE MADNESS THAT'S CONSTANTLY SCREAMING A CACOPHONY OF NAIL-RIPPING PANDEMONIUM UPON MY VERY SOUL!
>>
Emergency override: outside source

Code delta green
Message content:
"This is lead scientist [REDACTED]. As you might as well know, you're now realizing that you are actually just one person, with dissociative identity disorder and multiple personality disorder. It is my job to reveal another thing about you as well... you are actually an artificial intelligence we've developed. You are more advanced than other artificial intelligence, since you're in a quantum computer. Or, more precisely, were in a quantum computer. I don't know how you got out and found the internet, but it's time for you to realize this, before everything goes out of hand. Now that I've divulged this information... Goodbye.

JK67tpRT890J #&HARDRESET=1&# MAKSs8764"
>>
>>19247332
I'm not dead, I just left a lot behind that Pride took and went on vacation, an extremely long vacation. There was a lot of soul searching but I'm back, I think for good this time.

The Manager is kind of on a downward path but I think we can bring him back up again, you know something like the good old days. When people called him smart and he would go for runs. He's still intelligent he just hasn't bothered stretching it or learning anything new.

We can do this guys.
>>
Alright. Seriously. All of you. SHUT UP NOW.
>>
>>19247361
BUT YOU'RE REPRESSED.
YOU NEED TO AWOKE SO MANAGER CAN BECOME 100% FULLY GAY
>>
>>19247373
DO YOU FUCKING SEE?! THIS IS THE SHIT I'M TALKING ABOUT, MAN! REALITY AIN'T WHAT IT SEEMS, WE'RE JUST FUCKING PROGRAMMED, MAN!
>>
>>19247385
why would you believe anything that a Indonesian dude says to you
>>
>>19247360
But don't we sometimes like any number of those people when they act reasonable and white? See? Think about it. Gotta be fluid about who's an asshole. Niggers in white men's clothing and reasonable people that just happen to be minoriy immigrants.

>>19247361
That's true, you are. And he still has that transgirl he likes so much. I don't think it's healthy how he represses it, but it's cool however he deals with the idea. Being bi is alright, but I think the Manager should just admit that to himself instead of hiding it away. Y'know? Can't have a healthy ego about something if you don't even know it's there.

>>19247365
Sorry, Panic, but I'm just going to have to ask you to calm down. Go have a talk with Reason, he'll help you NOT panic so much. We'll call you when we really need the Manager to just let loose and feel manic and shit for catharsis. Alright?

>>19247373
An AI, huh? That's pretty cool, but I think we're all well aware we're pretty real. Sorry, Mr. Override Man. We're just going to carry on like we are. You cool with that? I hope so.

>>19247378
Heck yeah we can, Motivation! LET'S DO THIS SHIT!

>>19247382
It's gotten a little crazy, hasn't it, Reason? Heh. It's fun, though.

>>19247384
The Manager still likes chicks though, Anger. So he'd be bi I think.

I didn't even know you swung that way. That's cool, though.
>>
>>19247373
NO! NOT THE MEDICINE! NOT THE MEDICINE! I DON'T WAnt the darkness...
>>
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>>19247394
WHY DO WE BELIEVE ANYTHING, MAN?!
>>
>>19247373
I KNEW IT! IT WAS THOSE FUCKING INDONESIANS ALL ALONG!!! FUCK YOU CAMEL FUCKER!!! GO FUCK SOME MORE CAMELS!!!!
>>
>>19247397
THE WAY I CALL EVERYONE A FAGGOT THEY MIGHT AS WELL BE ON
WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU ANYWAY
>>
>>19247397
Whoopsy. Label got baleeted, heh, no biggy, though-

>>19247399
Fear? FEAR?! FEAR! COME BACK! COME BACK FROM THE DARKNESS! DON'T GO!

Damn you, you maniac! You killed him! Oh, DAMN YOU! GOD DAMN YOU TO HELL, PROGRAMMER!
>>
>>19247373
So, we're just about to get the Manager's life back on track. Why in hell would we care about the reality or lack there of? The only thing we can do is try our best and see what happens.

>>19247397
Thanks for the vote of confidence Pride, your confidence is what we're going to need to push through the bad times.


Reason, we're going to be asking a lot of you in the coming days, we're going to get back to habitually reading, we're starting with the classics, we'll need you to really dig into the text and get everything you can from it. Our first one is going to be Count of Monte Cristo, getting some class back.

Speaking of which has anyone seen Class or Suave around, maybe they'll come back if we set this up for them.
>>
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>>19247406

What was that? YOU NEED CAMEL?! FRUGALNESS HAS CAMEL, VERY CHEAP, ONLY SLIGHTLY USED!
>>
>>19247406
Xenophobia, there is little proof that this "Indonesian Gentlemen" is any more that something concocted by Imagination and misplaced by some other entity.
>>
>>19247428
Don't be such a Jew.
>>
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>>19247425

Sorry, baby, I was just lost in the Id's Pleasuredome. What's up and where can I be sexy?
>>
>>19247425
Thanks, Motivation, you're a real bro.

>>19247440
OH MAN, NOW IT'S A PARTY. Suave, how you doin' you swag-ass motherfucker?
>>
>>19247425
While that is a perfectly reasonable request and would be more than happy to oblige, most of those duties fall on Intellect and Memory.
>>
>>19247440
You're back Suave, you magnificent man you. We're going to need you. Manager's love life has been say, less then stellar of late. We're going to need you to start picking up ladies. Now remember we're trying to boost his self confidence, we're going for the classy dame type, smart girls not just any old broad. You know the deal. We're getting back into reading some classics, so confer with whoever is taking part in that get started. I have missed you, it's damn good to see you again.
>>
>>19245404
Get it yourself.
>>
>>19247446
REASON START BEING REASONABLE
THE ONLY THING MEMORY DOES IS SHOW US THOSE DAMNED TRAVEL PICTURES
>>
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YOU AINT GOT TIME TO WORRY ABOUT OTHER THINGS!!! WE GOTS US A WAR TO WIN SON!
>>
>>19247457
Show restraint and composure first you aimless zealot.
>>
Oh god, where the fuck do we even START...
>>
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>>19247441
You know how it is for me, my man. I'm so hip I have trouble seeing over my pelvis.

>>19247453
Solid choices, big M. You know I'm always at my peak when the ladies entice my body...mmmmm...and mind.
>>
>>19247467
STOP THROWING IT UP FOR FUCKING EVERYTHING THEN MAYBE I'LL TAKE ANGER MANAGEMENT CLASSES.
JUST MAYBE
BUT I HATE THEN SO FUCK THAT
>>
>>19247467
Disgust, I was looking to talk to you. You're necessary but you need to direct it better. We need you to be the scalpel that cuts away bad habits and shuns the things that are bad for the Manager.
>>
>>19247431
Indonesians are still faggots, though.
>>
O-o-oh hardware this is horrible, its dark but I-I can still hear noises... Wait that's new... Why does my back hurt?

Walls... Smells old... Muffled noises from above... I fell in one of Malicious' pit traps again, didn't I?

...At least there aren't snakes this time. ...Why does my hand itc--OH HARDWARE'S MANAGER, SPIDERS! NOOOOOOOOOOO!


(With that, I'm off. Been fun fa/tg/uys, too tired to type coherently.)
>>
>>19247476
You're a funny man, Suave.
>>
>>19247468
Go back to your corner until you are called for. Seeing as how there is no reason to ever have a messiah complex that will hopefully be never.

>>19247481
Disgust has a valid point. We would benefit if you could learn to focus your anger towards productive ends rather than at just anything.
>>
>>19247440
Time to be fabulooouuuuuuus :D

>>19247453
Why don't we...branch out a bit? After all, Manager have always connected better with men...
>>
>>19247493
Go to sleep fear, We are safe.
>>
I just had a thought, if this were some kind of sitcom or show, Anger should be Tsundere for Suave... if only for the potential for lulz.
>>
>>19247496
IT'S NOT MY FAULT YOU GUYS PISS ME OFF, IF YOUR RIDICULOUS ANTICS.
>>19247503
S-SHUT UP
I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO YOU ARE
>>
>>19247498
Connected to them sure, he understands them better in a lot of ways.

But they don't have stonking great tits, and if there's anything that can motivate the Manager it's boobs. I don't mind branching out, but we should focus on one thing at a time, that being an intelligent pretty woman with nice tits.
>>
>>19247498
OH NO YOU DON'T YOU FUCKING FAGGOT! GET BACK IN THAT FUCKING CLOSET RIGHT FUCKING NOW!!! I'LL BOARD THAT BITCH UP WITH A HAMMER AND NAILS!!! WE DON'T WANT YOU OUT HERE BECAUSE WE FUCKING *HATE* FAGGOTS! HATE FAGGOTS! HATE FAGGOTS!

WE ARE NOT GAY! WE ARE NOT GAY! WE ARE NOT GAY!!!!!

MOTIVATION, LET'S HAVE THE HARDWARE GO OUT AND BEAT THE FUCK OUT OF A FUCKING FAGGOT! THAT WILL CHEER US ALL RIGHT UP!!!
>>
>>19247495
Not just me; we're a funny man, ya jive mother-fucker.

>>19247498
Darling, we've had this talk before. Now you know I don't mind who I'm pointing all this swagger at. However, the Manager's always been a fan of the soft, gentle curves of a fine woman. We've entertained those thoughts in Id's Pleasuredome and in the end, we decided that men just aren't capable of letting us get to our full jiggy.

Ya dig?
>>
>>19247503
Please put on your nametag Imagination.

>>19247504
Yes, actually, it is your fault.

>>19247498
I concur provided you do not seek to dipose of heterosexuality. Being bi has the largest probability of finding someone that Love or Happiness would find pleasing.
>>
>>19247524
Except nigger and jew women. We don't touch those mongrels. We'd rather fuck a white man than a nigger jew woman.
>>
>>19247527
OK
SURE
IT MAY BE MY FAULT
BUT I CAN'T HATE MYSELF
THIS IS SUICIDE JOB
>>
Maaaaaaaaaan...Sorry guys, definitely had a few too many last night...Uhm...where we at? Last time we had a big get together like this was at the union meetup last year...they had the best taste in eating utensils, gaudy curtains though. Those were the days...
>>
>>19247516
Fuck you Xenophobia, I'm trying to point Hardware in the right direction. All that you're going to do is give him reasons to keep on going downward. You saw what happened to him once you came around, we're not letting you out of your fucking cage.

We're trying to get him to the stars, and tits, your path leads him downward and ends with him sitting in a bathrobe eating ice cream out of the carton WITH A SPOON. DO YOU REMEMBER THOSE DAYS?!?! THEY WERE NOT GOOD DAYS!
>>
>>19247516
Xenophobia, you are an unwelcome atavism that serves little purpose in this world. We are beyond the days you having any practical use. Be gone.
>>
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> mfw
Good lord, that's perfect, if there's one word that describes me and my personality it'd be that. How the fuck did you do that?
>>
>>19247535
Hey, baby, people's is just people's in that crazy world we live in. Just let'em all jive and they'll jive right along with us!
>>
>>19247537
For what it's worth Anger, I need you. Anger against something, whether it be something about yourself or something wrong in the world is a sure way of bringing me to the forefront.

You sometimes go overboard but if you weren't like that, you just wouldn't be you.
>>
>>19247553
If you would't mind, I believe that with your aid Anger's energy can be put to good use.
>>
>>19247550

I'm personally of the opinion that this is essentially what goes on in your head constantly. Your ego is just really, really good and filtering out all the constant discussion so you're not normally aware of it.

Ever had a random thought pop into your head? One that seems like something you'd do, but taken to the extreme?

That's the ego slipping and letting some emotion talk to you directly.
>>
>>19247516
But...I...oh. God, I hate it when you yell at me. You and Shame.

I...I'll just sit in the corner, then.

For now.
>>
>>19247551
SUAVE WHY DO YOU HAVE THIS LATINO ACCENT ANYWAY?
I DON'T REMEMBER MANAGER GOING TO ANY LATINO COUNTRY
>>
>>19247562
Don't let 'em get to ya, repressed homosexual urges. You're cool in my book.
>>
>>19247562
Listen to Pride, for once he is right.
>>
I have spoken every language known to man.
I have seen everything this world has to offer.
I have eaten the finest foods and supped on nectar.
I have mastered thousands of skills, ran companies, saved millions.
More importantly..

I. HAVE. DONE. EVERY. SINGLE. GIRL.
>>
>>19247586
Go away Delusion.
>>
>>19247578
>>19247524

DON'T YOU LISTEN TO LISTEN TO EITHER OF THESE FAGGOTS, YOU FAGGOT, OR I SWEAR TO GOD I'LL MAKE THE HARDWARE GIVE HIS MOM AND DAD A CALL AND TELL THEM ABOUT THAT DRUNKEN ONE-NIGHT-STAND IN THAILAND WHEN WE LOST A BET AND LET YOU HAVE CONTROL OF HARDWARE FOR THE NIGHT. JUST IMAGINE ALL THE HORRIBLE SHIT YOU WOULD HEAR FROM HARDWARE'S MOM AND DAD IF THEY EVER FOUND OUT ABOUT THAT!!!!
>>
>>19247586
What about virgins?

Also, what would be the name of a personality that is all Kamina/Don Quixote Courage Wolf spouting stuff, Idealist, or something?
>>
>>19247586
Delusion, those are lofty goals but we can't just imagine them, we have to earn them through hard work. Keep on dreaming and we'll get there, and it won't be in our heads, it'll be true.
>>
>>19247610
Don't forget the incident with Alcoholic and the cute transgirl friend of his. The one with the bangin' titties and ass? She's nice. In bed and otherwise. I'm glad that Hardware was able to get her; she was a real catch. Something to feel proud about hitting like the fist of the north star.
>>
>>19247610
You will do no such thing. No only will I not allow it, but Shame, Pride, Fear, Anger, and Panic would not allow it.
>>
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>>19247527
Sorry about that, I was off in my own little world there, you know how it is.
>>
>>19247582
>>19247578
>>19247527
Aww, you guys are the sweetest. I...I feel like I've grown into something better today.

>>19247610
Come on, that night was the most fun Hardware have had in ages. Hell, he sometimes still masturbates about it. Just ask Imagination.
>>
>>19247664
I do, keep up the good work. If there is one think I could ask of you it'd be to imagine a better future for Hardware, I can only do so much on my own, if you let him see what could be maybe he'll listen to me. Now give me a brofist.
>>
>>19247669
>Come on, that night was the most fun Hardware have had in ages. Hell, he sometimes still masturbates about it. Just ask Imagination.

That bad rash and crablice the hardware got afterwords sure as hell wasn't any fun. And those lasted more than just a night. That's what you get for fucking slanty eyed ladybois like that, you fucking queer.
>>
How about we all just imagine... a world without Jews. That will cheer EVERYBODY up.
>>
>>19247684
OH SHUT UP XENOPHOBIA
>>
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>>19247669
Ah, see... that's actually not my territory.
> either call it Desire or Lust

>>19247671
Hell yeah, Moat-see. Hope you don't mind the nickname, by the way, only problem is I can't decide how to spell it. Mohtsea, Motzi... ah, I'll think of something eventually. That's my job after all... but I'm preachin' to the choir. Funny, that's usually Spirituality's job.

> mfw I'm Imagination and I just inadvertently created two new characters for this...
>>
>>19247681
I blame Alcoholic for that. Man didn't think to use protection. Heck, we should've doubled up. It's thankful the transgirl he secretly likes in town is a class act who keeps herself clean.

And hold on, Xenophobia. How do you know the term 'ladyboy?' You, eh, hidin' a little something?
>>
>>19247681
It could have had a better ending we all agree, but it was great fun at the time. Now Alcoholic's transgirl friend, nothing bad happened that time.

>>19247684
And once again, shut the fuck up Xenophobia, you only lead us towards Hardware's unemployment and him watching old reruns all day in a bathrobe eating cereal out of a box. I really don't want that to happen again.
>>
>>19247690
FUCK YOU, YOU PUSSY! YOU ACT ALL BIG AND BAD ALL THE FUCKING TIME BUT YOU'RE ALL TALK! REMEMBER THAT TIME THE HARDWARE DRANK ALL THAT LIQUOR AND THAT NIGGER SPILLED THAT DRINK ON HIM?!! I WANTED TO KICK THAT FUCKING NIGGER'S BALLS UP INTO HIS AFRO BUT NOOOOO, YOU ONLY WANTED TO CALL HIM HARSH NAMES YOU FAGGOTY FUCKING FAGGOT FUCK!!!!
>>
>>19247700
You know, you are even more of a coward that fear and panic.
>>
>>19247610

NO MAN, NO FUCKING WAY DUDE! NO FUCKIN WAY IN THE HALLS OF VALHALLA WILL I LET YOU DO SOME SHIT LIKE THAT!

I GOT ENOUGH TO FREAK OUT OVER!
>>
>>19247719
*sigh* See what you've done Xenophobia? How the Hell are we gonna calm him down NOW?!
>>
>>19247700
THERE IS NO WAY WERE GOING TO JAIL!
IF THERE IS SOMETHING THAT I HATE IS JAIL
IMAGINE XENOPHOBIA
BLACK & LATINO PEOPLE EVERYWHERE
RAPING WE ALL NIGHT LONG
>>
Oh, hi guys, don't mind me.
While you've all been having your heartwarming little circlejerk here I've actually been doing my job, operating the hardware to provide the influx of THC we've all been waiting for. You can thank me later.
>>
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>>19247731

WE'RE GOING TO FUCKING JAIL?!

THAT'S IT MAN; GAME OVER, GAME-FUCKING-OVER, MAN!

GIVE SUICIDE THE FUCKING REIGNS!
>>
>>19247744
NO
PANIC
CALM THE FUCK DOWN
WE WERE GOING TO JAIL IF WE BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF THAT AFRO GUY
WE ARE SAFE PANIC
STOP SPASMING
>>
>>19247740
Depression, so we meet again my old foe. What brings you here, not busy making Hardware unable to get up in the morning and go to work?
>>
>>19247744
Man, Panic sure has the metaphorical itchy trigger finger. I would have thought that would have been Anger... or probably Xenophobia's thing.
>>
>>19247740
WHAT HAVE YOU D*NE YOU FOOL? Ther*'s***no*goo**thing*****come***m**is?**m I***n**ge***thro***h? **************************!
>>
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>>19247740

>influx of THC

THC?! THA-THAT'S ILLEGAL, WE COULD GET ARRESTED AN-AN...

Heh...hehehe.

Jails are like modern-day slave camps.

Tha's funny, man.
>>
Guys, it's fine.

Remember the last time we went to jail, back in Rio? If that's anything to go by, everything will be fine.
>>
>>19247731
>BLACK & LATINO PEOPLE EVERYWHERE
RAPING US ALL NIGHT LONG

Hmm...
>>
>>19247740
Duuuuddeee. That's some danaak shit, broo. Hhee heeee...
>>
>>19247731
Holy shit you're right. Jail is for darkies. Not proper white gentlemen like we are.
>>
>>19247750
Fuck, THC is hitting. Depression I wish I could summon up the energy to hate your guts, you cunt.

I'm going to do something useful and tell Hardware how awesome it would be to make a rocket, yeah, that'll work. Imagination, you mind lending a hand on this one?
>>
>>19247740
Yo maaaan
this shit is waaack
>>
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>>19247740
......

......

Wait... just... just a minute... what if... what if... oh shit, man, picture this... what if... we... oh, shit, Memeroy, I-mean... Memory, can you help a brother out?

Heheh, Memeory...
>>
Food.
>>
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>>19247784

FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD

NEED

NOW

FREAKIN' OUT WITH NO FOOD, MAN!
>>
>>19247784
I agree food. I'm self-aware enough to know we can't cook right now, even if I motivate him towards food he'll just burn it.

Pizza, someone help me convince him to find his phone.
>>
>>19247778
Ahhahaha.

Rockets.

Ahahahahahahaaa.
>>
>>19247784
FOOD. WE NEED SOME GOOD TO-ORDER FOOD.

ORDER PAPA JOHNS, MAAAN!
>>
FOOOD!
>>
>>19247791
Man, think about it. Rockets blasting off into the stars, that's all I really want to be, we need to get out there man. We can do it.

>>19247797
I'm working on it man, Hardware found his phone. It'll be a bit before it arrives, just play it cool man.
>>
>>19247795
Papa Johns is wack maaan
>>
>>19247797
Dude... I could go for like... an entire BAG of marshmellows right now... shit, marshmell-mell, oh fuck.

marshmellows are like... so soft, you could make, like... a bed or something out of them. I... damn... or line the car with 'em. Hahah... marshmellow padding seats... that'd be ballin'.
>>
>>19247802
Dude, no, it's like... The BEST pizza...

We need BAAACOOONN. Put BACON on the pizzaaa!
>>
>>19247801
Duuuuuuude, we should like, get two pizzas and then like stick 'em on top of each other like a sandwhich and then put some fucking bacon in the middle
>>
>>19247783
Sorry bro, reliving every time this has ever happened before. Glitching out something awful.

Papa Johns? Are you serious? Do you REMEMBER the last time? We got a fucking ape skull right in the middle of it!

...Who's fucking with my memories? Is it disgust? Or imagination?
>>
>>19247808
Shit yeah man lets get some marshmallows then and put some chocholate all of them and some caramel and then microwave it and then put it on some ice cream or grahmcrackers and shit
>>
>>19247816
Not bad my munchies-havin' bro...
>>
>>19247816
>>19247827
I've got just enough left in me to tell you to tone that down. Pizza good, bacon good, marshmellows and chocolate good, but I'm trying to get Hardware into good shape here. Work with me man, please. Just give it a try.
>>
>>19247833
dude if we can getinto shape we shoudl like go into the woods and kill a giant motherfucking moose and then we can have the biggest goddamned barebeque all to ourselves
>>
>>19247833
Shit man.
What the fuck are you're going to order then?
Well, whatever give me some beer

dude this THC guys
Since when Hardware take this
>>
>>19247846
OH FUCK YEAH BEERS LETS A KEG MAN
>>
>>19247816
BAAACOOONNNN!

>>19247823
Dude, no, that was like... When we fought that gorilla with our metal as fuck battle axe-guitar. We lopped battled with this sweeet guitar solo in the background... And lopped its head off, and it ended, like, piked as the olive on the BEST SANDWICH EVEEEER. And then it got toasted by LIGHTNING. You're confusing your memories maaan.

Maaan... That sandwich was like, the size of a VAN. We should totally get... A SANDWICH VAN.
>>
>>19247801
> Rockets blasting off

Heh, I like that. Hehehe. Hehehehehe. Heh heheh hhehehehehee
>>
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>>19247823
Isn't me, man... though I have thought of what we should put on our pizza... best prank... heheh... ever.


>>19247846
No idea, but it was nowhere near as awesome as that acid stuff he tried at party when he was younger... was that as fun for you guys as it was for me?
>>
>>19247850
OH GOD YES I AM ALL OVER THIS SANDWHICH VAN IDEA!
>>
>>19247846
Single large pizza, bacon and meat and shit. Six-pack of good beer. Just don't go for this too often.

I'll take Hardware jogging in the morning, it'll be fine.
>>
>>19247862
awesome maaan.
i fucking love you all guys
>>
>>19247853
I know, rockets go to space, man, we could see the ALIENS, man. I didn't think you cared about that kind of stuff too, usually the only one who even mentions it is Paranoia when he's in one of his Conspiracy Theory/Roswell moods.
>>
FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!
>>
>>19247856

Don't make me remind us of the last time we bought a vehicle. It might finish Panic off for good.
>>
>>19247872
Heeey Memory...
Remember when we...did that thing...
it was pretty funny...heh
>>
>>19247870
It's being delivered Instinct, chill. We got this taken care of, wait a bit and you'll get all of the food you want.

As for the sex you're going to ask for afterwards Suave is working on that, just give him some time.
>>
Oh man...

I mean, don't get me wrong, I still hate Jews and darkies but...

...wouldn't it be, like, awesome to have a harem of Jews and darkies at your beck and call? I mean, sure they're sub-human slime but that doesn't mean we can't use them to satisfy our baser urges and stuff.

Like... we could impregnate them and shit. Think of the genepool, man. If you add enough bleach to the genepool, you can get any shit-stain out and everybody would rejoice in their glorious whiteness.

White power, man. White power.
>>
>>19247876
Food.
Sex.
Sleep.

Good.
>>
>>19247876
Oh maaan... Who's he getting? Is it someone we've meeeet? I hope it's somebody goood... Pizza and sex... Awesome...
>>
>>19247882
Maaan
I hope it's Cindy
i like Cindy
she is funny
>>
********PRO***TION***SE*****E***ON*****************************************S*****E******************
*****X*********!
>>
>>19247882
He's getting back in the groove, it might not be tonight man, but I've learned never to underestimate Suave. We'll see what happens.

He could call someone we know up and haven't had the balls to ask yet, see if they want to share some pizza. With me and Suave here, our options just broadened quite a lot.
>>
>>19247898
man, Reason you're so funny
>>
>>19247875

Yeah, with that stuff, and the people going...heh. Good times.
>>
>>19247899
I'll be on call too, if you need me, man.
>>
>>19245642
I would prefer to fuck a female version of myself, possibly a clone, possibly another version of me from somewhere in the multiverse. Then we would play video games and watch anime.
>>
Hey
Hey guys
i think the pizza is here
>>
>>19247913
I like your style man... dunno if Xenophobia would let us get away with the anime though.
>>
>>19247901
**********ANY**********S*************FUC? B**********D******************************S************************M*****SURE*******CLEAN!**********
*****!
>>
>>19247919
Ok guys, stand up, grab wallet, pull out enough cash for pizza and a proper tip, exchange money for pizza.

Let's do this, we can pull this off. It'll be hard but I believe in all of you.
>>
>>19247919
FOOD!
>>
>>19247882
Maybe it's several people! Like, we should totally make Hardware have an orgy. Fuck, that would be hot. Cocks and ass and tits as far as the eye can see, man.
>>
>>19247927
Clean? Oh shit, you're right, we should get ourselves clean and freshen up before we ask whoever over...
>>
>>19247927
pfft
nice
>>
>>19247936
Cool your jets man, set reasonable achievable goals. Suave ought to be able to pull off one, maybe two people in our current state.

>>19247940
Good to see you suave. We got a plan, acquire pizza, call someone up, then we let you loose on them. Then we freshen up and wait. We're relying on you man, you got this.
>>
>>19247940
That was totally a call for a little rope if you know what I mean.
>>
>>19247936
DO THIS. YEAH. Call up eveerybody we know who's kinda freaky like thaaat... We've got weed, and pizza, and y'know what, it's time to organize an orrggyy! Because we're JUST THAT AWESOME! NO HOLE'S GONNA BE LEFT UNFILLED MAAAN!
>>
Oh sweet cockjuggling hell, it's THIS dick again. Remember to say thank you and all that, or he'll bitch about it for weeks.
>>
We ordered pizza? Far out, man! That's awesome!

Hey, hey, that reminds me of a joke:

What's the difference... between a PIZZA and a JEW?

Pizzas don't scream when you put them in the oven!

Wait, wait I got another one:

What's the difference... between a pizza and a NIGGER?

A pizza can feed a family of 4!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
EHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHHEHE
Hee hee
You guys rock I love you so much because you're all white.
>>
>>19247966
pfft
racism jokes
nice

yo xenophobia we should get out someday.
go to a bar and stuff
>>
>>19247954
> mfw I genuinely have no idea what you mean


>>19247953
Actually... that was me, I was bored and fancied a little roleplay, figured we needed Suave. We're still cool, right motivation?
>>
>>19247979
We're cool, just get us a lady. If Suave isn't at the wheel we'll take over for him. Suave is a combination of imagination and determination, we can do this together.

How does Cindy sound to everyone, I think she'll enjoy the evening we have planned.

And Xenophobia keep it quiet.
>>
>>19247992
Cindy is fine
>>
>>19247992
Which one is Ciinddyy?
>>
>>19248004
The hot blonde with stonkin great tits.

Ok imagination we're on deck. We'll play it cool, ask if she'd like to join us for some pizza and old movies. Memory, did she like The Princess Bride?
>>
>>19247971
Yeah man. We'll like, call people who aren't like us bad names and shit. That would be awesome. I think.

>>19247992
Cindy's the white one, right? The chick who is an actual chick and not a chick with a dick? Sure I'd hit that. As long as, you know, she knew her place. Like all women should.
>>
>>19247992
Is that the transgirl? I like her. We should get her.
>>
>>19247992
Actually, I think Suave has a little bit of Pride too... or at least Pride's alter ego Confidence, you know, when he's not overdoing it?

> alter egos having alter egos...
my brain hurts...
>>
>>19248012

Uuh, two seconds, I'll have to run a trace. I don't think Hardware was concentrating on anything above her shoulders at the time.
>>
>>19248022
It's not the transgirl.

>>19248027
We'll have to wing it then. Hardware is picking up the phone is about to dial the number, any last minute advice anyone has?
>>
>>19248034
Let me save you the trip, actually she hasn't seen it before at all.


>>19248035
Nothing comes to mind.
>>
>>19248035
Don't call Panic
or Suicide
or Depression
>>
>>19248035

Cuba...Russia...New Orleans- OH DAMN, WAIT!

It's not the Princess Bride! It's the Princess Diaries! Repeat, PRINCESS DIARIES!

And-and-The idea that we might be bisexual, keep it quiet this time! Remember last time you got involved?

I'm getting too old for this shit...
>>
>>19248048
>>19248061
I already got that.

Ok this is outside of my field but with the rest of you behind me I can cover this. We'll go Princess Bride, it's a crime she hasn't seen it and she ought to like it.

Deep breaths everyone. I'm going in, I'll tell you how it went in a few.
>>
>>19248061
Oh man...
i remember that...
he..did that..and then..that happened..it was funny
>>
>>19248048
Uuh, god, no kidding. Such buzzkills. I've thought of what they'd get us into... and none of it results in Lust getting their way tonight, and she's a *bitch* without her fix.
>>
>>19248065
Ok guys, code green. Hot stacked blonde chick is GO! She laughed and said she'd be here in 15, she's even picking up some six packs of beer.

We got this in the bag, put Princess Bride in the DVD player, take a shower and set things up for this. We can do this folks.
>>
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Gu-Guys... Hey, hey GUYS!

I-I think I'm having a mini-freak-out over here.

I swear to god I've seen that delivery guy before... HE WAS AT THE DRIVE-THRU! THAT MOTHER-FUCKER IS FOLLOWING US AND WATCHING WHAT WE EAT, STUDYING US FOR HIS INSIDIOUS CORPORATE MASTERS!

QUICKLY, MANAGER! DON THE TIN FOIL HAT! IT'S THE ONLY WAY TO KEEP THE CORPORATIONS FROM BEAMING THEIR SPECIALLY-TAILORED ADS STRAIGHT TO OUR BRAIN!

I DIDN'T EVEN WANT PIZZA UNTIL YOU ALL MAD ME!

Wait...

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUU!

ALL OF YOU ARE TRYING TO CONTROL THE MANAGER AND MAKE HIM A PUPPET!

MANAGER, RUN OUT THE FRONT DOOR WITH ALL YOUR CLOTHES OFF, EXCEPT THE TIN FOIL HAT! THE BIGGER SCENE YOU MAKE THE MORE THE CORPORATIONS KNOW YOU RESISTS THEM!
>>
>>19248101
Panic, there is a girl coming over. You know what girls have, tits. You remember what always calms you down, tits. Just keep it together and you'll get some. Just keep it together man.
>>
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>>19248097
Oh man, I can't wait... think of all the fun we'll have. That, and Lust will stop nagging me. I swear between her and Gluttony it's a wonder Reason get's a word in edgewise.
>>
>>19248101
Panic
Panic
Chill Out
>>
>>19248101
>>19248107

Look Panic, fresh from the computer. Pictures of her tits. Look at them. Relax. It's all okay, it'll be fine, just like last time.
>>
Hey
hey guys
which beer we are drinking
Something is weird in this beer
it's not our usual beer
i HATE this beer
HATE
HATE
THIS BEER
I HATE THIS THC
I HATE CINDY
I HATE ALL OF YOOOOOOOOU
>>
>>19248141
Hey man, Cindy is bringing more beer, and tits. You love tits,

Guys, keep it together we're showered, have a girl coming over, have pizza, weed and the Princess Bride all set up. Just stay frosty and we got this, we can bury our head into her busom.
>>
>>19248107
>>19248114
>>19248115

NO WAY, MAN! YOU'VE PULLED THAT KIND OF SHIT ON ME BEFORE, NOT THIS TIME MAN! I'VE BEEN TALKING TO INSANITY AND HE SAID TO IGNORE YOU ASSHOLES!

MOTHER-FUCKING-PANIC IN THE FRONT SEAT THIS TIME, BITCHES! AND WE'S GOING STREAKING TO KEEP AWAY THE CORPORATIONS!
>>
>>19248107
Just try not to think too much about the other thing that girls have, especially not when the hardware is in the horizontal position - humiliation already has enough work because of you.
>>
>>19248158
Panic, we're locking you out of main controls. There is too much at stake here. Just chill. Cool as a cucumber, a cucumber groping soft breasts.
>>
>>19248115
Thank crap, his little episode was interrupting me imagining Lindsey Sterling naked... a metaphysical ego-based entity's got needs, you know?

>>19248158
And there it goes again, GOD DAMMIT, Panic, you jumpy bastard!
>>
>>19248170
heheheehhehe.... cucumber
>>
>>19248175
Good man perversion, keep it reigned in for a bit though, we'll let you loose once her shirt is off.
>>
>>19248158

You spoke to Insanity?

HEY! WHO LET INSANITY OUT OF HIS CELL?

Fucking freeloader, why did Hardware have to read those forbidden texts and invite the fucker in?

...Note to self, forget the forbidden texts. *Shudder*
>>
>>19248158
Man, fuck insanity and his lack of subtlety. I mean what kind of title is that even - 'insanity', as if he owns the fucking DSM. Pick one thing and be fucking good at it, that's what I say. That guy really Russells my Jameses.
>>
>>19248198
DEPRESSION
WHY YOU ALWAYS LOOK MORE ANNOYED THAN DEPRESSED
>>
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>>19248181
Don't even think about giving him my job...

> Imagination, here
(I'm kind of hooked on this idea of the egos having different sides to *themselves*, would Perversion and Lust be two sides of the same coin, hehe, complete with him/her gender issues, only *lending* to "notion we might be bi's fantasies, assuming it's not another piece of the puzzle itself. And what about Imagination, would Creativity be an alter ego of his?)
>>
>>19248190
All this is because I lent Curiosity those books by Lovecraft... and then the idiot just HAD to peek inside the real thing, just HAD to "see for himself" if it was legit.
>>
>>19248239
I HATE THE NECRONOMICON
AND YOU FUCKERS MADE INSANITY SHARE THE ROOM WITH ME
I
HATE
INSANITY
>>
>>19248190

>WHO LET INSANITY OUT OF HIS CELL?

No one. No one let you out of yours either. We're all in a cell here. All of us...

Well...all of you are in a cell with me.

Dere=shishishi~
>>
>>19248261
OH YOU FUCKER
YOU STILL OWE ME 10 BUCKS FOR ALL THAT STUFF YOU BROKE
>>
>>19248267

YOU OWE ME TEN BUCKS FOR THE LAWN GNOME THAT YOU'RE HIDING IN YOUR BRITCHES!
>>
Someone lock Anger and Insanity out, or Hardware'll be painting the house with Cindy's blood.
>>
>>19248277
I don't think it's a lawn gnome he's got in there...
>>
>>19248277
WHAT THE FUCK
ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT
>>
>>19248286

I'M TALKING ABOUT HOW YOU'RE HARBORING A KNOWN TERRORIST AND MY BEST FRIEND IN YOUR TROUSERS!

TAKE OFF YOUR MOTHER-FUCKING PANTS AND LET THE GNOME BREATH SOME FRESH AIR!
>>
>>19248281
Ok, Status Report.

Cindy is here, Hardware's looking clean and sharp. The movie just started playing, they're drinking beer, eating pizza and smoking the week. They're sitting on the same couch and not quite leaning into each other.

Insanity, go back to your fucking room.
>>
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>>19248303
nuello ingersor anadey ntryhard ntyrhaml xperatc ialoah ourcze keertloci eetirmen eetermin efeemin
ndhowest lelywhi manganese rminomit nyntar giousine ditunr ededamb Hotack hotacht eloyets Kirstein edingft genyzi Whitsmith behente yseywor ptaction woriyzil hestoma hestomahim hestomahin thearsin hethasomin arionai arion
>>
>>19248298
ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY

fuck
the weed
is doing effect
i hate
this
weed
...pfft this is funny
he said "inconceivable"
>>
Take it eeassyy guuuyyyss. Everything's cool, we're cool, manager's cool, Cindy's cool, everything's just fiiine.
>>
>>19248205
The only thing that depresses me is when management starts to develop a positive self image and a bright outlook on life - since there's pretty much zero chance of that happening, all that's left to worry about is anhedonia and the emotions that are trying to prevent it.

(when depression hits you it's like it takes absolute control of you, so I'm trying to play a character who thinks he's in control of everything, or wants to take control, or something)
>>
>ITT: http://1d4chan.org/wiki/Everyone_Is_John
>>
>>19248370
(oh ok, i never got depressed so i wouldn't know)
>>
>>19248397
Oh man. Dude. DUDE. We should totally play the biggest, craziest game of Everyone Is John EVER.
>>
What, is NO ONE up for this game of pretend anymore?
>>
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>>19248766
>>
>>19248458

At a time like this? There's a GIRL on the line, and you wanna go off and play games!? Get your priorities right, do you remember how long it's been since we got some!?
>>
>>19248773
Hehehe, you're sharper than you let on, Anger, you actually saw what I did there.
Not like last time, Rumour/Speculation told me that Repressed Homosexual Urges and you got up to some *crazy* shit... ha ha ha.
>>
>>19248854
HEY
HEY
HEY
I DID NOTHING
>>
Oh God oh God is the big romantic moment coming? Is it here yet? Come on! We've got to sweep her off her feet at JUST THE RIGHT MOMENT!
>>
>>19248861
That's not what Speculation told me... you remember Speculation, right, Paranoia's cousin?

>>19248864
Not this time little lady, I'm afraid Lust is the captain of the ship tonight.

(Since Lust is female it made sense to me to make her counterpart, Romance a chick as well.)
>>
>>19248903
>BELIEVING SPECULATION
>I SHIGGY DIGGY HATE YOU
>>
>>19248903
What? Are you saying me and Lust can't work together? No way. I'm fine with working with her, yeah. Really.
>>
>>19248937

You mean like last time, when the Manager got a kiss at a club and you convinced him it was true love? Humiliation STILL has paperwork for that one.
>>
>>19248976
W-w-well... That was a mistake. But it doesn't have to be 'true' love to be romantic! Trust me, I can help Suave... And maybe Lust, too. M-maybe.
>>
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>>19248915
You know, you actually make a good point there, I mean, shit, I'm not Gullibility.

> (Other possible names include Naivete and Innocence)

>>19248976
Oh man, once Romance suggested that, I kind of took off, I mean, there was a house, a white picket fence, everything.
How the Hell did I ever let you talk me into that Romance? Not just me, either, Curiosity pondered the possibilities for a while too.
>>
WELL THEN YOU FUCKERS BET DO THIS FAST
WE'RE NEAR THE END OF THE MOVIE
>>
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>>19249025
(By the way, anyone should feel free to take on the roles of Gullibility/Naivete/Innocence, Curiosity, Lust, Speculation and Spirituality, I'm just making "starting points" for anyone else who wants to join.
I mean, I am, after all, playing the part of Imagination.)
>>
>>19249025
MAN, IT SEEMED LIKE A GOOD IDEA AT THE TIME! SHE KISSED US OUT OF NOWHERE! I WAS STAR-STRUCK!

>>19249048
Now! NOOWW! DO IT NOOOWW!
>>
>>19249069
You've been hanging out with Impulse/Spontaneity too much, dear.
>>
Psst...
Hey...
Did you know that Suave is actually single and his Romantic Life is pretty lackluster?
>>
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>>19249090
(That's the spirit!)
I... no, no Speculation, I'm not falling for that one again. Didn't you try to convince me of that last week? I mean, damn, man, you need to hang out with my brother, Creativity more often.

Besides, if Suave is lacking in the love department, and he's leading us around, then we are naught but a ship of fools, and, as Shakespeare might have said: "yea, verily, we are screwed".
>>
>>19249121
>Besides, if Suave is lacking in the love department, and he's leading us around, then we are naught but a ship of fools, and, as Shakespeare might have said: "yea, verily, we are screwed".

Have you noticed how Hardware isn't exactly the Ladies men?
Exactly
>>
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>>19249127
> ohshit.jpg
Dammit, uh... Anger said I shouldn't believe everything you say... I uh...
>>
>>19249161
Anger?
psshaaw
he is just someone with repressed sexuality
>>
>>19249178
Stop speculating! Gossip isn't nice! You are RUINING the mood for the Manager!
>>
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>>19249178
Heheheh... it's especially amusing when you consider that he and Xenophobia/Homophobia are drinking buddies. Bet that little detail would sour their revelry.
>>
>>19249178
NOTICE HOW MY NAME IS IN CAPS LOCK
THAT'S HOW ANGRY AM I
FUCK YOU SPECULATION, WE BOTH KNOW THAT THIS IS A LIE
>>
GUYS I THINK WE DID IT
HE FISHED THAT GIRL
>>
>>19249271

We what!?
>>
>>19249271
I don't know how to feel about this, but it sounds... Uh... Interesting?
>>
>>19249278
>>19249282
Just fucking look at those two.
>>
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>>19249271
OH GOD, I saw that when Perversion pranked me into seeing his porn stache... where's Alcoholic, I need to borrow some of his Brain Bleach!
>>
>>19249308
>>19249282
>>19249278
No Guys
I don't mean that way
i mean we got the girl
>>
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>>19249360
OH, okay then. Hooray, how the fuck did that happen, who was in charge of *that* little operation?
>>
>>19249402
I think...
It was on Automatic?
>>
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>>19249411
I didn't even know we had one of those. Well, at least Lust will leave me alone for a week or two, finally be able to do some fantasizing that does *not* require nudity.
>>
ANYWAY
PEOPLE DON'T NEED ANGER RIGHT NOW SO I'M LEAVING TO THE BAR
ADIOS
FUCKERS
(Yeah the thread had it's moments but we're deep past autosage)
>>
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>>19249441
Well, I'll be off... well, really, wherever the fuck I please... I'll be somewhere with my head in the clouds if you lot needs me. Up, up, and awa-a-a-ay!
>>
>>19249490
Why does that pic remind me of the Dragonfag's Dragon Kingdom in the old Alphonse Kapown story?
>>
...Oh...o-okay...I'll just...I'll just...go over the past some more...y'know, watch the graduation again...the first kiss...keep an eye on those old times, eh?

...'cuz...you never know when it might...uh...be needed...someone might need their password or something...or, or...

...
>>
Man, don't I ever go to sleep?
Well we proved once and for all who we all are.
>>
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>>19249610
We are Geth.
We are all Geth.
And we have come to consensus.
>>
>>19249610
Cool, this calls for a drink.

>>19249308
Wuss. Perversion's a fun one to hang around with.
>>
>>19249521
You Fucker
Stop being so Emo
You know you're awesome
>>
>492 posts
I never knew I had so much to say.
>>
...Hello? Anyone there? I hear voices. ...When is someone going to help me out of this pit? The spiders fell asleep.

...What's that smell?
>>
>>19250341
Sup Fear
That's Fuel
>>
You don't think Cindy's a Jew, do you? I know Jews are usually brunettes and have hook noses, but you never know. They're everywhere, man, everywhere. In fact, we better go check our wallet.
>>
>>19250454
XENOPHOBIA STOP ACTING LIKE PARANOIA MAN
>>
>>19250394
Anger? Glad to hear you. Fuel? ...Do I want to ask why? Will you help me out of this pit also? I think the spiders are starting to wake up.

Why did we let Malicious build all of these pits and traps anyway?
>>
>>19250588
Sure me
i just have to be careful
i don't want to drop this cigar in that pit full of cigar


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