Has an /tg/ story ever wowed you?
>>20080691Most STORYTIEM stories wow me and made me want to try tabletop gaming in the first place
I love /tg/ Storytimes, especially the ones that actually finish and don't suddenly drop off when it starts getting good.
YupSadly, "Epic" is not contagious
>>20081285I'll tell him that!
Posting Bakersgirl story
>>20081285Also you may be excited to know, SABURO and I are starting a new game. He is DMing and I am one of five players. We're doing 4e Dark Sun, and I'm playing a Thri Kreen Swarm Druid.My swarm form is flying scorpions. Everyone in the group is so pro-environment I'm pretty sure our adventure group name is the Sierra Club. If good stories come from this game, you bet we'll have more threads to share.
>>20081341>>20081353>>20081362Aww shit, I was in that thread. That was truly awesome.
>>20081403>Sierra ClubAwww shit yeah. You get an extra ration of Cold Fun.
>Thragmarr and Urist, part 1!
>Thragmarr and Urist, part 2!
Yes. There was this one on LARPing that took me like 5 god damn hours to read, and it was awesome. It inspired me to LARP so god damn hard, I had to get out and try it. But then the novelty wore off and I remembered LARPing is kind of really dumb so I still haven't. Anyways, great story. I loved how it kept blurring what was happening and what they were pretending was happening without ever really "switching", it's just mixed perfectly. http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/11295346/#11296991or maybe it was the sequel that was that good. I don't think I have the link to that one.
Mars Horror and this.
>>20081462>>20081481I'm so glad I got to read that story when it was written
>>20081568Indeed. We became a part of history, that day.
The ones that wow me are the ones that I can't really believe happened as they did.Like this one.
Yeah, that one story about the guy who encountered some drunk Scandinavian guys dressed like Musketeers.
>>20081644This one still puts a shit-eating grin on my face, every time.
Does anyone remember that heavily embellished LARP story where the guy faces off against the Schwarzenegger dude with a greataxe or something?It wasn't the one about the LARP that guy Lord Ulcik or whatever, but it was several threads long, it was a beautiful fucking story, good lord.
>>20081708yeah. it was a third sequel written by another faggot. dont have it saved, but its in the suptg archive somewhere.
>>20081740Ah, Old Man Henderson, what a fucking hero. Posting.
>>20081748doh, beat me to itah well
>>20081708This story, and the recent "I Want to become THAT GUY" thread that evolved into story time are two of my favorite threads ever on /tg/.
I don't want to be huge faggot and spam shit I've been in, but this is worth asking: has anyone NOT read the saga of STORYTIEM?I'm just waiting for either AC Quest to start or my boredom to push me towards some vidya.
>>20081767Can't say as I have.
Good god I forgot about this one
>>20081772holy FUCK that's awesome>>20081782Fair warning, this is a lot of reading...but I think you'll be impressed by the end.Part 1: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/8483458/#8485987Part 1.5: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/10032392/Part 2: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/11995407/The Finale: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/14188616/I don't think I will ever play a tabletop game as good as this one.
This one is pretty devious.[I also have one of /v/ uniting a guy with his long lost love (and she loved him back). It happened yesterday, seriously. Unrelated, but if you want it.]
>>20081844!! THAT ONE GUY. i rememeber when that first went down. so they ended up back together! THAT'S FUCKING AMAZING.
>20081757oh shit, Al'Sham from the Adventure of the Chainshirts?! I didn't think any of you guys still hung around /tg/. It's been ages since we last heard from storytiem... I remember he was in the middle of telling us about his nautical/pirate campaign. What have you lot been up to?
>>20081844post it. we are interested in the stories, even the games aren't standard /tg/ fare
>>20081920A little backstory: The thread was about Maplestory. How Koreans were shit, nostaliga, etc. Some guys were talking about how they met bro's, and how they missed them so's. Then this happens.
>>20081938So, the guy who found her blog did more digging, and found her tumblr and youtube. After this, they talked on Skype (using the texting feature). Turns out, she missed him. A lot. They promised to talk to eachother, said they loved eachother. Then, he ended it with "Don't forget to text me tomorrow <3"And she replied "i couldn't if i tried".I didn't get the last bit, I'm digging through the archive to get it, give me a moment.
>>20081907The problem is none of us live near each other. Saburo and I are an hour away from each other, and thats the closest. "Him" lives in the same town I do, but hes in grad school and never has time to hang out.Joseph Knock has pretty much stopped playing tabletop to my knowledge. He repairs computers on the other side of the state, I actually haven't talked to him in a long time.STORYTIEM's nautical adventure game is on hiatus, their group has had a lot of problems. Him and I still talk about games and stuff all the time, but I work a lot now and its hard.Saburo and I begin a new tale tomorrow though. See >>20081403
>>20081986Here.I didn't bother getting the part where he confirms that he saw her, and that she's a "cute Italian girl, skinny as hell", as he posted no pictures.
>>20081986I don't want to ruin this, this really is a fucking awesome story and I am feeling some feels, but>my fucking face when "peanutsncream"
>>20082046>that feel when an Italian weeaboo finds his long lost love by some creep looking her up after he mentions he had a crush on her in MaplestoryJust like my Japanese animesAlso, do notice, that she goes to /v/. When I took the screencaps of the whole thing, I checked the youtube account dates. Mehrana's was made in 2010, Peanuts' in 2008. He'd have to be doing Loki tier trolling to make an account in 2010 solely to troll /v/ two years later. Plus, there's just too much in the story for it to be fake. The blog, the tumblr, the youtube accounts, and the skype.
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/14268744/In all seriousness, this is one of the best things I have seen on /tg/. Check the whole thread.
>>20082046Not just that.>peanutsncream21There were 20 before him.
>>20081760This is my favorite.
Also, time for super secret trivia-The Beguiler I played almost got named "Anestro", but I was bored an hour before the game started and recognized that "wiles" could become "wyles", then I just randomly thought about what phonetics would go good with "wyles"-I found my old character sheet the other day, and I'm pretty sure I never wore a chain shirt. All I had written down was Quickness Armor (5,000g). Also, the Beguiler pretty much requires you to be wearing light armor. Maybe it was mithral-chain-quickness armor...but I don't know if I could have afforded that.
>>20081403In a fit of irony deep enough to drown a man in, I'm starting a pathfinder campaign in which my girlfriend is playing a vermin druid sometime in the upcoming weeks.That will also be storytime'd if it turns out to be worthwhile.
Just want to say, WHM actually posted a continuation to Old Man Henderson.Shit's whack.Search for Eli Burning (I believe) on foolz.
>>20081844I was hoping that would be compatible with 4chan sounds. Fucking brackets.
>>20081782I have such a hard on from the sheer awesome of this story.
>>20082449He never actually posted more than a quick summary of it actually.Also, for those of you curious as to whether or not Old Man Henderson was 'real'.... Yes, yes it was. I was there, I was the Professor and like 15 other fucking people.Because Henderson had no concept of 'collateral damage' or 'inside voice'.The whole and complete story was fucking crazy, because crazy shit was happening in and out of game, and he only gave you guys a 'highlights reel'. I might end up story-timing the whole thing. even though I'm not as eloquent as him. Seriously, I read the backstory of doom. What he told you about it does not do it justice.
I wish I has the screencap but two stories which showed me that l5R could be the greatest fucking game everThe first was the story of the scorpion and the crane who betrayed his party which ended with the scorpion nearly destroying the crane clan with his telling of their failed battle against a tengu and how cowardly the crane had acted and fled leaving his allis to die.The second was the tale of and old crab, too old to serve on the wall so serving as a diplomat to the crane and how the daimyo's son in his arrogance basically insulted the crab clan enough to warrant a war to which the crab simply shrugged it off and proceeded to beat him in every social combat possible.
>>20082857>I might end up story-timing the whole thing. even though I'm not as eloquent as him. Seriously, I read the backstory of doom. What he told you about it does not do it justice.You best spill some beans, man.
/tg/ always gives me a good laugh every now and then.
>>20082857If you did story time it fully you would become a god amongst fa/tg/uys
>>20082857A chance to hear the whole tale of Old Man Henderson?You have me hooked.
>>20082857you must spin your tales of this.
>>20081748you know...it never occured to meI would LOVE to read old man henderson's backstory
This made me chuckle.Late night stories are great.
>>20082906I'll give you a teaser, the 'prologue' to the madness if you will.WHM tends to get emotionally attached to a well made character. to him they're the means of exploring a story, and a good story is something he thinks is the very foundations of modern society is based on. He doesn't mind a 'bad end' so long as they're legitimate.Botched a roll at a bad time? Shit happens.Bad choice, in character? Meant to be.Simply screwed by circumstance? Them's the shakes.'LOL you're dead because you actually disagreed with my self insert fetish fuel character with two katanas!'? I actually had to stop him from choking the fat bastard.Which might make him sound like a bad person, ruled by petty emotion, but the truth is he's like a bear: normally quite chill. Not that easy to piss off normally. So he doesn't move often, but when he does... things like Henderson happen.It was the fifth session of the game with an 'experienced' GM, using 'Trail of Cthulhu' (a small distinction on the whole, but one worth mentioning in my eyes) and he'd already lost three characters. To the STUPIDEST shit.Seriously, the last one some evil force put a curse on him, and he ended up being killed by a horse.Falling out of an airplane.Yeah.
Well I wrote this and it got some positive results.Not really a story, but it was apart of them 'marrying the baker's daughter' threads.
>>20083125So the GM goes to grab the pizza, since it was his turn to pay, and I could feel the room cooling slightly. WHM's expression never changed, he never looked at me or the other two guys. "I know you're thinking about leaving, but I want you to stay. I want you to watch what I'm going to do."I knew this was bad, because while he can get frustrated mad (which is hilarious by the way, he makes a choking noise in the back of his throat like a murlock caught in a trash compactor), when he gets TRUELY pissed, he gets calm.We continue for the evening, and about a week later, we come back. He's giving me a ride, and he looks like he hasn't slept in two days, and the stubble is almost, but not quite, into gangly half-beard territory."I've done something. I'm not sure it's a good thing yet." he says as he hands me the little binder thing he keeps his character sheets and notes in."You've done something?" I ask, as I take the folder from him."I.... created? No, created is the wrong term. I feel like it was already there, waiting for me to give it life. I put a thing on paper, and I'm bringing it down on that fat fuck like the wrath of god.""Uh huh." I say, as I look at the sheet. "Is Henderson his first or last name?""I don't even fucking know."
That story about the dmpc that was always treated badly and who sacrificed herself for the group.
>>20083139So then I look at the stack of paper he called a backstory. I start reading it, and I'm immediately fascinated by what can only be called a tome of madness.It switched perspectives and tone wildly, at one point it's written with stage directions in the form of a script. At one point it went to GERMAN.I know for fact he only knows like two words in German, while I'm kinda fluent.The German was in his hand, and it was grammatically flawless.I find my voice."What?""Been asking that myself. All fucking day."
>>20083139>"Is Henderson his first or last name?">"I don't even fucking know."Dis is gonna be guuud.
>>20083149it was in GERMAN. >>been asking myself that all day
>>20082109>best thing you've seen on /tg/>a glorified dubs threadYou must have a really low opinion of us.
>>20082857>>20082857>>20082857Old Man Henderson story time...?!?!HOLY SHIT
>>20083125>>20083139>>20083149please, tell us more, PLEASE.
>>20083273Patience anon! If we rush, we may get nothing at all.
>>20081938>>20081986>>20082026>bunch of weeaboo normalfags pretending they love each other because they played a shitty browser mmo together>everyone has "feels" Really guys? You think this is a good story? I don't get it.
>>20083290how true. unsightly of me to forget myself in such a hallowed place.
>>20083051You could try to at least make the bump somewhat /tg/ related.
>>20083312>backstroke>not /tg/ related
The Dave stories wowed me by being amazingly inspirational. The Luke stories wowed me by making me sick.
>>20083149So we get to the game, and the GM asks what we're all doing. Detective Guy's drinking alone at his desk, waiting for one of his contacts to get back to him.Jimmy, the jock type, is struggling with math homework.My character, Professor Filkins, is grading mid-terms.Then we get the introduction to Henderson. He's sitting in a lawn-chair in his house, smoking a bong, staring at a wall he painted to look like a Hawaiian beach. "You know Rupert?" He addresses the stuffed parrot currently resting on the arm of his chair. "You're a good friend. Most people would've asked for a hit, but you know how much I love this shit. Way better than what we had back in 'Nam." he chuckles, and then begins reminiscing "You know, I still remember the first time I got high. Back of my Older brother's van. Know it musta been some good shit too, because I'm an only child. Ain't that right Charles?" He looks over to an empty corner of the room.
>>20083344Super Dave definitely made cry.Shit, my eyes water up just thinking about it.
>>20083353".... Charlie?" He then gets up mildly concerned. "Man, what the hell?" He begins to search the house in earnest, before sitting down on a chair in his kitchen. "Where the fuck are my lawn gnomes? I mean, did somebody steal them? Who the fuck would steal them? Yeah, they're worth a lot, but come on." He then pulls out a sharpie and begins to scribble on the table. "Alright, 215 gnomes, total weight about 800 pounds, total value approaching 40k. Not a one man job. Need help to carry them, need help to sell them. I'm looking at a large and well organized group of assholes."He looks into the middle distance. "Like those guys down the street? They're Mormans, right? Large religious group, come around in the early morning like those damned charlies.... Rupes, I think we've got a lead." And then he pored a bottle of jack daniels in a large go-cup, and went and got in his car.
>>20083359OhOh my god
>>20083149OH GOD MOAR
>>20083359dis gun be good
>>20083353>back of my older brother's van. Musta been some good shit, too, cause I'm an only child.OH GOD YES!
>>20083359Mormons, cultists.Same thing really.
Someone better be archiving this as the best fucking thread to ever grace /tg/
>>20083402on it, mate.
>>20083402I put in an archive request a few minutes ago. Old Man Henderson is one of the heroes of TG, I refuse to turn my back on his saga.
A classic from when /tg/ invaded the sector of Omega LE, sector 19 F.
>back of my older brother's van. Musta been some good shit, too, cause I'm an only child.
>>20083415>>20083413>>20083402>archiving a thread that's mostly imagesYou do realize you are specifically NOT to do that?
>>20083424I think it's mainly for Old Man Henderson.
>>20083424misunderstood me. im screencappin it, not using suptg. suptg doesnt like archived threads full of images.
>>20083413Ironic or not, I don't see how someone can praise something that looks like it came out of a flash RPG.
>>20083359Before I get back to the rest of the party, it should be noted that Henderson looks a lot like Jeff Bridges of today. So imagine all of his lines in that voice. Because that's the voice we were treated to at the table.Anyway, I've had the lead on a cult meeting for a while, and I managed to get an invite. I'm sitting in the front row, listening to a passionate arab man talking about how there's more to the world than we know. Despite myself, I'm intrigued.Jimmy is sitting outside, thinking about his friends and trying to decide if he should go in and talk to them or what.The detective's gotten his call-back, and is now watching the scene with interest. A battered '92 Buick Century fails to get their attention until it suddenly executed a perfect handbrake turn and parked at the curb.Back to Henderson's point of view, he's blasting Creedance Clearwater when suddenly he sniffs the air and says 'Mormons' before whipping around and parking out front and killing the car.He then gets out of the car, and pops the trunk. In full view of the detective, he then shoves 'Lurid Lucy', an inflatable sex toy of exceptional quality, to one side and pulls out some for of Israeli made combat shotgun and started walking towards the house.He then kicks open the door while our mouths are agap andt shout the words that let us know the game would never be the same."MUCKLE DARMED CULTISTS! 'AIR YOU NAMBLIES KEEPIN' ME WEE MEN?!?"
>>20083443Oh my god. This is like if the Star Wars prequels didn't suck.
>>20083359>More fucking Old Man HendersonGoddamn it, I wanted to get some sleep tonight. Oh well, proceed you glorious bastard
>>20083435The beard redeems the medium, not the other way around.
>>20083424It doesn't matter when the thread is the full story of old man Henderson.This is like /tg/ history and religion rolled into one and occurring right now so it must be kept.
>>20083443Dynamic Entry: Natural 20.
>>20083468it will be, mate. i got this. imma spread this shit like herpes on prom night
rolled 4 = 4>>20083359>Posting Old Man HendersonYES!
>>20083468right? Imagine them saying "too many images, cannot into archive"I hope to god Henderson does not think they've got his gnomes this time.
>>20083424Strike witches quest routinely hits the image limit.Every thread of that is archived on suptg.I don't think people particularly follow the rules of it anyway
>>20083443>>20083443>Old Man Henderson: The Movie>Starring Jeff Bridges>Written and Directed by the Cohen BrothersI just came so hard the pneumatic pressure cut through my pants and desk.
>>20083510I would watch that so hard I'd break Moh's Scale.
FUCK SLEEPINGITS OLD MAN HENDERSON TIME
>"MUCKLE DARMED CULTISTS! 'AIR YOU NAMBLIES KEEPIN' ME WEE MEN?!?"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!Miles away, dogs are barking as I squeal like a little bitch
>>20083303>bunch of weeaboo normalfags pretending they love each other because they played a shitty browser mmo together>everyone has "feels" >bunch of weeaboo normalfags>has "feels">normalfags>feels>>>/r9k/
>>20083510It'd be like Men In Black meets Fargo.And it'll be awesome, you betcha.
>>20083443So at this point the GM has not yet realized what Henderson IS. In fact, I think I'm the only one who truly understood what was about to happen to existential horror, as at this point in time....Here's another fun fact about WHM: When he's at a game table with a character sheet, you aren't at the table with him. You're at the table with whatever character he's playing until further notice. I don't think he could've meta-gamed if he tried.So anyway, the GM has decided to regain control the only way he knows how: By killing Mike's latest character via bullshit, and summons a shoggoth.Henderson, having passed the will check to not puke up his brains, and winning the initiative, comments on how it's the UGLIEST fucking poodle EVER oh god, and then shoots it in the fucking face until it dies. Then he shoots the cultist guy who summoned it. Then he shoots me, then a random guy, then he pisses on the shoggoth's corpse since everyone else is too busy losing their shit in a panic over the Creature That Should Not Be being summoned, and casually sets the tapestry on fire with his cigar as he walks out the door.
The tales of BBB and Luke, Plagueson of Nurgle
>>20083586I agree 100%. People who use the word "feels" unironically belong on /r9k/.
>>20083643So then everyone still alive runs the fuck away from the burning building before the cops show up. Henderson makes it home (about three blocks away) when he realizes something horrible.He totally fucking forgot about the lawn gnomes.He RUNS back to the still burning building, only to see the fire department has already arrived. They inform him that no gnomes were in the building that they can tell.On the one hand, he's relieved as fuck since he didn't lose the gnomes, and killing that many little people would probably constitute a hate crime.Never mind that he totally just leveled a church with the speed and brutality of the fucking spetsnaz.Anyway he goes to try and cook up where they could have gone at the local pub.The Gmk at thins point looks up ast us from his notes. He's clearly been thrown so far off the fucking tracks by what just happened that he can't just improv his way out of it. "I... I think I need a minute. Or ten."He amscrays, and I look over to the man I thought I knew. He has his cell-phone out, and is asking us if we're cool with Chinese food since we had pizza last week."What the fuck was that?" Asks one of our fellow players."Remember when I said I was getting revenge? I brought out the big guns. I don't even have the small guns anymore. I was given some once, and pormptly returned them. 'Won't be needin these' I said. Hello, (Chinese food place I forget the name of)? You still got that special on the shrimp fried rice?"
I don't know if Nowhere is an actual member from the game, or just an enthusiastic and talented writefag, but I don't care either way.This is like being nearby when Moses called for a stone tablet and a chisel.Sir, you have my rapt fucking attention.
I think I'm gonna have to end it there for tonight. I'll keep going tomorrow night if this thread's alive. Otherwise I'll just do it in the future.
>>20082857I must ask, is there any way to obtain the background of doom?Preferably with notes on changes through the game.
>>20083676Come on. At least a little more before bed.
>>20083643>>20083652Oh god, I love this. I love this as much as I loved the original.
>>20083652Well.You gotta fight crazy with crazy sometimes.
>>20083676Thanks for sharing, this was awesomeYou gotta come back soon and share more, this was like mana from heaven.
>>20083676oh no you fucking dont! For the love of all that is unholy, this story must continue!
>>20083676what time will your next be? i don't know if this can be kept alive until then...
>>20083676>More Old Man HendersonFa/tg/uys and ca/tg/irls, we must keep this thread alive.
>>20083676You... You cockteasing beautiful bastard!You can't do this! Please!
Hey Sean. I thought you said 4chan was 'beneath' you.Don't worry about the writing, you're doing fine, /tg/ has lower standards than your English professor. Hell, you're doing better than mine, since I normally green-text or whatever.Also john wanted to know if you still had his 'lucky' d20 in your car.
Here is the pic for the story so far.Sorry about my terrible paint skills
>>20083726This is too fucking good to be true.
>>20083726I love you.
>>20083726i cant. believe it.physically. cannot.
>>20083726Meh. I only went to /v/ before. /tg/'s a lot better.thanks for giving your OK, sorry for putting your real name out there, (you passive aggressive bastard).>Also john wanted to know if you still had his 'lucky' d20 in your car.Are you talking about the fat one, the one who I was in fencing classes with, or the one with the lazy eye?
>>20083726Do you still have the backstory of doom? We'd sacrifice virgin goats for a look.
>>20083766I have a virgin son to sacrifice! Even better!
>>20083652This is amazing. You are amazing. WHM is like unto a god.>>20083676I will eagerly await your return.Someone make a cap.
>>20083765The fat one. We know a John with a lazy eye?>backstory of doomFuck no, I burned that thing. It was EVIL.Seriously, the world is a better place without it.
>>20083788Why would you do that!
>>20083788>I burned that thing
>>20083765/tg/ is by far the best boardhave you ever read any of the /tg/ rap threads?
I wish i could stay up to see the amazing "other side of the OMH story.
>>20083788Henderson truly was too good for this world
I feel like a man among gods in this thread.
>>20083797>>20083799>>20083805>>20083806No trust us on this one guys, you don't really want to read it.Seriously.You only THINK it would be cool. It's actually horrible eye rape.>>20083788I'll have to look to be sure, but I don't think it is.
>>20083788Damn...You burned a relic of /tg/. Something many might call a holy artifact.I morn it's passing...It probably WAS evil, though.
>>20083850We fucking LOVE horrible eye rape, half this board frequents /d/
>>20083788Probably a good callBy the sounds that made the necronomicron look small time.I would risk madness for a peek still.
>>20083850>horrible eye rape>mysteriously fluent german from nowhereThere is no other document in the world I want read more right now.
>>20082109That thread made me want to stab my monitor with a pen.
>>20083850>>20083788>Implying we WOULDN'T want to read an accursed tome written in a mad fit of eldritch inspiration I'm willing to take the hit to my dismal SAN score to learn the forbidden knowledge within.
>>20083850I'm pretty sure everyone on the board would still read it.The worst that can happen is that it makes the reader create a Henderson of their own.
>>20083788>>20083850NOT COOL MANIT WAS A MISSING HOLY RELIC
I think it's agreed./tg/ wants the Backstory of DOOM.No matter the consequences.
>>20083850Fuck it man! I've sat through Sonichu! Translate the German!
>>20081844I laughed.Am I going to hell?
>>20083941They would try and fail miserably.Henderson is something that we should only have the stories about, not something we should every try to remake.
>>20083962No because the guy played it perfectly.While the others tried so hard to be evil and then turn it around he had no delusions, no ulterior motives.He stalked the girl, he learned about her, he did everything possible to see what her life was like. And then he killed her like we woud squash a bug.
>>20083962>laughing at the death of something that isn't even real outside of the mindYeah, you'll burn for eternity.
>>20083344>The Luke stories wowed me by making me sick.Old hat.
>>20084032NO! I HAD FINALLY FORGOTTEN!
>>20084032>mcwTAKE IT BACK!
>>20083941We all shall become Sons of Hendor and make ritual sacrifices to him and his avatars of wee-men shall arrive to take over the world.
>>20083958No. No translations.We'll do that ourselves.We need the raw original backstory, not anything edited.Translation is basically the art of matching words that have similar enough meanings.
>>20084032>Cannot even read due to blurry cap.Somehow I am glad of this, I feel like I avoided something terrible
>>20084074You have. For this is the tale of Big Boy Blue. A horror and scourge upon humanity.
>>20084110A tale that shrinks souls, banishes hope, and leaves people gibbering like after a daemon possesses and mindrapes them!
>>20084109>scroll down slightly>lactating NinetalesNOPE.
>>20084074Don't worry, you're just missing out on boring fake story.
>>20084109>Rape of humans. Rape of animals. Rape of furry people, and even a scene where a tentacle monster with a baby’s face that ran a Mojoverse-like world is forced to perform fellatio on the giant, veined members of this rhino army’s leaders. Oh, and they also murder their targets and rape their corpses.
>>20084124sounds sexy, i need my daily dose of chaos for tonight.
>>20084032Anyone have a less shit cap of this?I've never read it.
>>20084137refer to>>20084109and prepare to roll for SAN loss
>>20084144Maybe I'll just pass...Yeah...I think I'll pass
>>20084155fuck that! a little madness never hurt anyone.
>>20084155Maybe you'd try this instead?http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/6898745/http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/6910746/
>>20084032Luke was the harbinger, and Big Boy Blue was the final form.
>>20084032Y'know, I was planning on heading in tonight. Maybe pop into /m/ with my trip on, see if any Gaiking threads are up. Now? Now I find sleep to be overrated. And have lost a fuckton of faith in humanity as a whole.Excuse me while I go vomit.
>>20084282We warned you about Big Boy Blue man. We warned you.
>>20084282Hmm...We're missing one more foul gem.The story of Wet Blankethttp://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/19884145/
>>20081808can some one explain this to me?
>>20084370It's a Lovecraft joke. Say Hastur's name three times and you summon him.
>>20084370If you say "Hastur, Hastur, Hastur" you summon the King in Yellow, supposedly.The poor fool was suckered into reading "hastur, hastur, hastur" through three distinctly useless help files. He had it coming, like any other fool that summons the King in Yellow.
>>20084377And not the cute anime version of dubious gender.
>>20084390Except for Old Man Henderson, the crazy bastard.
>>20084421Hell OMH did it knowing full well what he was doing and summoned him into a trap.He is about the one person in history to summon him when it was correct to do so.
>>20084421he was obviously not OMH
>>20084428He knew what he was doing, but it was all for his wee men. That's all he wanted in the end, not to kill some lovecraftian god, just to save his wayward gnomes.
>>20084032Calling bull shit on thisIt has to be, why didn't the fiancee just... talk it out with OP herself?Oh god please let it be fake
Been fighting sleep too long and it looks like our narrator is gone for the night. Please let this thread still be up when I arise.
>>20084451Because people are stupid and terrible and that is as real as the beard upon your neck
We're still doing storytime then?>Blacksmith's son, strong of body but lacking in education>Foundling, never knew my real parents>Father was friends with a wizard, arranged for a scrying>Prophesied to become the greatest warrior and conqueror to ever live>Also prophesied to bring an age of darkness to the lands, sowing chaos in my wake>Doomed to bring horror and death to all living souls>Kept completely secret for 20 years>Wizard dies, dividing up the estate reveals he wrote the prophecy down>Village chases me from town, all of my friends screaming hate at me>Father tries to protect me, beaten to death instead>Betrothed douses me with lantern oil and lights me on fire>Villagers toss me off cliff into river>Puts out fire at least>Wash up on shore many miles away knowing my death is near>Suddenly feel a presence the black out>Wake up two weeks later in an isolated, windowless, frigid castle high in the mountains>Hurt everywhere, flesh healed but still scarred horribly>Beautiful pale raven-haired sorceress enters room>Tells me she saw me and saved me during one of her travels>Thank her but tell her of my plight and how I am probably better off dead>Doesn't seem to mind for some reason>Says I can stay as long as I like, it's lonely in the mountains
ASCN, WHM, you still here? I, for one, am itching to hear more.
>>20084504>Months later fully healed and know the castle fairly well>Most of the servants are quiet but don't think much of it>Life of luxury compared to blacksmithing>Never leave castle but never really need to>Direct sunlight hurts my burned skin anyway>Talk with the sorceress often, share meals and conversation>Not that many people other than servants in the castle, seems she really is lonely>Begins teaching me some basics of magic, reading, and mathematics>Meet captain of the guard who teaches me swordsmanship>Take to it amazingly well and quickly outmatch everyone else>Make friends with some of the sorceress's relatives living there too>Being nobility, they teach me battle strategy and we have fun with war games on paper>Soon can best anyone in the castle no matter the handicap>Time passes and study more with sorceress and captain>Eventually learn history and tales of conquering kings>Interested but still brings up bad memories, slip into depression>Sorceress tells me not to worry and just do what I want>Together with captain of the guard she throws parties and takes me on moonlit rides to cheer me up>Slowly fall in love with her and become best friends with captain>A year after being saved tell her my feelings>She is taken aback and runs from the room>Give chase into her private chambers>Coffin and bottles of blood everywhere>Castle full of vampires and undead servants>She's crying saying how she never meant to trick me
>>20084508>Don't give a single fuck>Kiss vampire queen passionately>She reciprocates and we share the night together>Next dusk ask for her hand in marriage>She joyfully accepts and announces events to her family of other vampires>Bride to be spends more and more time in the depths of the castle as wedding approaches>Captain of the guard assures me it's fine and normal, asks me what I am giving her>What?>Run to the library and find out about traditional wedding gifts>Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck>Suddenly idea!>Find a specific magical tome in the library>Run to find captain of the guard>Eventually day of the wedding>Everything is wonderful, exchange vows and couldn't be happier>Bride is radiant and happily presents me with my gift>Black suit of invulnerable armor to protect my sensitive skin>Made from her own blood, will keep me alive undamaged and immortal as long as she lives>Smile and announce my gift>Captain of the guard opens ballroom door and dozens of skeletons stride in carrying banners>One for each of the undead legions I've raised>"My gift to you, my love, is to make sure you are never lonely again. To you, I shall give you the world itself."
>>20084032>>20084327If I ever meet this guy IRL, I'm buying him a goddamn drink. Dude suffered through both those crazy fucks. He's more than earned it.
>>20084504>>20084508>>20084515What game was this?
>>20084538Apparently there were more like them, like his roommate.>Varyingdegreesofwant.jpg
>>20084560I think that was only of the stories that came out from one of the peasant threads. Same one as >>20081341 's story I believe
Some guy played a gothic Alice in a WOD changeling game with Blade Runner elementshttp://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/17810362/
>>20084565Sounds like quite the story, honestly. Kinda interested myself.
>>2008468110/10 would fucking bawl again
ThisEver since then I've had my personal hero.
>>20084327AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!I don't want to believe one person can know this many fucked up people.
This thread had better still be here when I wake up.
This thread cannot die
Slowpoke here, but I personally find Luke a worse that guy than BBB.simply because while BBBs actions were probably worse, he at least has the excuse of being certifiably insane.Luke did it because he was a revolting human being that makes me ashamed to be in the same genus as he is.
>>20085553They are both examples of why he gene pool needs some chlorine.
>>20085560ah crap, now I'm going to have to reinstall Postal 2.
Butter golem, anyone?
And with the viewing of this thread, I have witnessed the creation of new history. Blessed be the writers for such gifts.
Is anyone up for finding and piecing together everything that WHM&co have given out about OMH?If not, I will. And try my damnedest to combine it all into a somewhat consistent narrative.
>>20085856http://1d4chan.org/wiki/Old_Man_HendersonIs everything I know of that is saved.There was also the OMH rides again thread but I can't find it.
>>20085917There's also this thread and possibly others.WHM has a sporadic habit of giving out new info on Henderson. The 1d4chan page only has the first thread he was in, not even anything about his return.
>>20086006Searching foolz for waffle house millionaire will probably find you whatever there is.
>>20086257Waffle House MillionaireWHMOld Man HendersonOMHHendersonThose are the most important ones.Unfortunately I'm on my phone right now, which isn't conductive to archive searching.
>>20086347Yeah searching the archives for his name should give us everything he has posted which includes all the OMH threads.
>>20086393As opposed to trying to find the subject or content just searching for the name I mean
>>20083788So this is what Muslims feel like when people burn the Quran.
>>20086459Nah, they don't care as much as we care about the backstory of Old Man Henderson.
>>20086459They know the contents of the Quran. We only know fragments of what's in The Backstory.
Why was this not posted?
>>20086459I don't think the muslims have to deal with the original writer himself burning the original copy before it's been duplicated and calling it painful on the eyes and also evil.
>>20086554I don't care if it hurts. I'd read every single part of it. Every. Single. Part. I'd even learn German for the sole purpose of reading that Holy Relic. This must be what the Emperor felt when he killed Horus.
>>20081621I remember this thread, we told the OP to go after the Baroness. I think there was another thread where he describes going on a date with her, did that ever get archived?
>people like Old Man HendersonYou're shitting me, right? Oh wait, I get it, it's that whole "hipster" thing where people like something on the bad end of mediocre in order to be cool, right?Yeah, that Old Man is really hip, what with his KOOOOOKY antics, am I right?
>>20086644>people like Old Man HendersonYou're shitting me, right? Oh wait, I get it, it's that whole "hipster" thing where people hate something everyone else likes in order to be cool, right?Yeah, that Old Man is really shit, what with his derailing the game, am I right?
>>20086653damnit forgot to change the greentext to >people hate Old Man Henderson
>>20086644People like Henderson because he's fucking insane and made of win.Also, by using a minor rule he permanently killed Hastur. The actual god, not an avatar.>>20086616I would too.I was just saying the muslims have nothing on us now.I guess you're right, it is like emps striking down Horus. The BSoD was a part of Henderson, that has forever been lost.Also, I'm not sure if I'm surprised that he was the idea of an elder god given to a human.
>>20086653>something everyone else likes
Surely OMH will deliver
>I.... created? No, created is the wrong term. I feel like it was already there, waiting for me to give it life. >I start reading it, and I'm immediately fascinated by what can only be called a tome of madness.>It switched perspectives and tone wildly, at one point it's written with stage directions in the form of a script. At one point it went to GERMAN.>I know for fact he only knows like two words in German, while I'm kinda fluent. ... The German was in his hand, and it was grammatically flawless.>Fuck no, I burned that thing. It was EVIL.Based on this, I too am curious to read this thing, but I also think WHM made the right call in putting it into the fire. It doesn't sound like it was meant for this world. If I had to guess, I'd say that it was only passing through on a vector to realms unknown and unknowable. It was not a thing of this earth. Given that in his last adventure (that I've read) old man henderson killed the actual god hastur, and given the possible eldritch nature of the character itself, or at least the possible eldritch origins of the character, the adventures of old man Henderson could be interpreted as a grudge match or proxy fight between the powers of Hastur the unspeakable and some other opposing elder power. But that, of course, would be pure speculation.
>>20088344I for one, would be eager to awaken the Great Old One/Outer God Henderson into our world...Or, considering his antagonistic nature towards Hastur, perhaps Old Man Henderson is an Elder God?
>>20088386You are going to kill the thread. Just stop, no need to update every 20 minutes.
>>20086459There's other qurans around. There's only one OMH Backstory.
I''m not sure if I'm the only one, but I was pretty fond of this story.http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/19918297/#p19930315
>>20088445I think Henderson transcends godly classifications. He is simply Henderson, Alayer of Old Gods and Seeker of Wee Men.
>yfw Henderson's player admits he didn't write the backstory>yfw he found it somewhere>yfw Old Man Henderson's backstory of doom is actually the real necronomicon
>>20083312you sound like you have 0 ranks in swim.
>>20088862Impossible.Hendersons backstory is a freaky and amazing tale.The Necronomicon is a book about how to do evil shit.It probably is an eldritch artifact, though.That STILL will not stop us from reading it.Life is a race to 0SAN.
I dunno if this'll get archived, but here's a current excellent thread:http://archive.foolz.us/tg/thread/20085832/And here's the old 'rape factory' thread, that was apparently lost from the archives:http://archive.foolz.us/tg/thread/14288873
>>20086644This is how I feel about BBB and wet blanket.
>>20090297Well, the thing about those two is that nobody likes them.
>>20090356People obviously like the stories, they just think the content is gross. I think the way the stories are written are obnoxious and uninteresting. But every time it's posted, everyone NEEDS to respond about how it's the nastiest think that has ever happened in the history of anything.
>>20090408Welcome to 4chan!
>>20090498No, I understand how common it is, but /tg/ really has a knack for doing this for shitty stories.see>>20081938>>20081986>>20082026for an example of what I mean.
>>20090538It's a story from /v/ not /tg/ but alright.Moreso I get frustrated by the obvious lies, and not the possible lies. The story of the girl with self-inflicted cutting claiming some evil hambeast did it rustles me roughly in the jimular region.
God fucking damn it, there's so much fucking stories in here.And /tg/ have the best stories.And I want to go to sleep.
>>20090538>stop liking things I don't like.jpg
>>20090658So you get tremendously butthurt over the story of Grendel?
>>20090658>It's a story from /v/ not /tg/ but alright.And look at the responses it got.
>>200907493 responses, 2 of which are combo posts complaining about the story, one of which is actually expressing feelings?Yep. Totally horrible.
>>20090828>3 responsesI don't know how to converse with someone who's argument completely defies reality, so I guess you win.
>>20083726I can't belive I'm in the same thread as WHM! I'm like a cheerleader backstage!
>>20091629That was yesterday.He's presumably not here right now.WHM, ARE YOU HERE?
>>20091737Don't worry, the thread is on sup/tg/ so even if we go to bed and miss story time, we can check up on it later unless this thread 404s (which remind me:This is reply 295 and I'm not up to date on when threads auto sage, so this might count as a bump).But it is always more fun to read something as it unfolds, reading story time on sup/tg/ is like eating a cold pizza; Cold pizza is awesome, but warm pizza is even better. I hope that metaphor makes sense.
>>20092054Embrace the cold pizza, my friend. It is apparently all we're going to get.
>>20092054300 is bump limit.I was just joking a little.I agree about the metaphor.Also, being there for a bit of /tg/ history is always fun.I was actually around for the Vagina of Spider Holding thread, even if I didn't post. Shit was whack.Basically it's "That really definitely happened! I should know."
>>20080691This one did:http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/5434203/insane premise. awesome outcome.
>>20081844That is awesome, but so fucking wrong.
>>20092308I know that feeling. I was in the same position when Deep Rot was being made.
Holy hell, this thread's still alive?Catalog isn't working for me, what page are we on?
>>20095277You're back!We're on page 6.
>>20095313I'm not 'back' back, just had a minute to pop in.Page six? I'm still a couple hours out. Looks like we'll need a new thread or something, just thought I'd check.
If we make a new thread, someone please post a link here.
>>20092308I always wanted to refind that thread just to ensure I wasn't hallucinating.>>20094153That was another one that was awesome to see.The whole idea was just so stupid it was great
>>20095332how many is a couple? i wanna take a quick nap, mate.
Alright, gimmie five, I need to start a new thread since this one's sinking.
New thread: >>20097465