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/tg/ - Traditional Games

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Greetings fa/tg/uys! today i'd like to share with you all some excellent recipies for gametime noms. ive had great success with these myself. interested?

start off with this: http://www.bazillionpoints.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/AUTOPSY-jalapenobaconbombs-HELLBENTFO
>Saturday is coming and I need delightful food
>This thread

This is what I needed.
Cut water chestnuts in half, wrap in strip of bacon, secure with toothpick. Soak in barbecue sauce overnight and cook at 350 or so until crispy before game time.


Mah Creole.

Though there seems to be far too much cheese and not enough meat.
Obligatory meatbread tips.

1. Use melty cheeses. The kinds that crumble are bad. I prefer goat cheeses, but that's because there's a bunch of small independent cheese makers around here who make awesome goat cheese.

2. Use low-fat meat. lean beef or pork, fat cut off. I sometimes mix it up with chicken and some currysauce for a dressing.

3. Bacon

4. Wrap in Bacon

5. Spice up the meat you use. If the meat tastes great by itself, it'll taste lovely in the bread.

6. Try to learn a good bread dough recipe and do the whole thing from start to finish. I personally use sunflowerseed bread as my base.
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I actually have a few recipes saved, although your mileage may vary.
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got a few, being a vegetarian most of this shits useless but i like infos
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Yeah, they are mostly sweets, why?
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Fantastic mixture of a french fry po boy and poutine. You can grill these up shortly before with little to no prep, and yeah... Mmm.
OP here. heres recipie for my muffaletta. its different from the pictured one.
Then without further ado, I introduce you to the muffaletta, the pictured sandwich of awesomeness.
What you need:
2 16oz jars italian giardiniera mix
sliced green pimento olives
quater pound salami
quater pound pastrami
quarter pound provolone
Remoulade sauce (boar's head for above 4)
olive oil
minced garlic
round 16oz loaf of fresh bread (i use white mountain bread from publix)
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I think this is it for me.
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>spice mix
>works on steaks/burgers/you name it
1/4 cup salt
2 tablespoons paprika
1 tablespoon black pepper
1 1/2 teaspoons onion powder
1 1/2 teaspoons garlic powder
1 1/2 teaspoons cayenne pepper
1/2 teaspoon coriander
1/2 teaspoon turmeric
man, that's the recipe posted on peanut butter jars. It's awful (I tried it once while out of flour)

let me find a real peanut butter cookie recipe for you;

>2c flour
>2t baking soda
>1/4t salt
>1c butter
>1c peanut butter
>1c white sugar
>1c brown sugar (packed)
>2 eggs

Mix the flour, soda and salt -set aside

Cream the butter, peanut butter and sugars. Beat in the eggs, one at a time -mix well

Add flour mixture to creamed mixture, mix well. Shape into 1" balls, place 2" apart on an ungreased baking sheet. Press flat with fork

Bake at 375F for 12-15 minutes
Okay I got a big folder of these, want me to start with my alcohol related or the unsorted folder?
By all means!

Oh my god, I love those!

What I like to do, sometimes, is just slice up tomatoes then lightly cover them with a pinch of sea salt. Very simple snack, but very tasty.

I rarely do this because it takes so long to make, but I also have this weakness for cabbage, mushroom and potato, or blackberry and cottage cheese varenyky. Too bad that without help, it can take upwards of 3 hours if you're making everything yourself by hand in a small kitchen. :(
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I have no idea how many of all of these there are
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>Sorting things into categories
>Alcohol and Not Alcohol

My friend Dave has two fridges because of this sorting system.

It works.
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>poutine grilled cheese
jesus, all it's missing is a steamy and some maple syrup and you're basically eating Quebec
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Would it be simpler to do a rar of them if there's a big number?
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Tastes like shit or really bad champagne.
Give me some snacks that don't need an oven, it's retardedly hot
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Booze is relatively small, Im at the end of this one. I had more somewhere, but a rar of the not booze may be better.
What is the powder in the jar? What are the approprate ratios of all of these substances?
For an infographic there is very little INFO in that pic.
This is more likely ti give you food poisoning and horrible vomiting when it goes foul because you didn't keep it light and temperature controlled.
Ah, one of our men makes magnificent--truly magnificent--brawn. It is without comparison, I am told he learned it from his mother in Serbia, and that his is the best because he refrigerates the reserved liquid at a different temperature than the cooling main portion, and uses the drippings to make the supplementary crackers.

Headcheese, pretty much the best thing ever. I doubt he'll share his recipe.

Some Acadians make similar sandwiches in NOLA, though you have to order them off the menu.

Get one and split it alongside some sides and you're full for the century.
looks like sugar and yeast, and it looks like how one would make shitty alcohol.

>using bread yeast with highly acidic juices
>expects to taste decent

Get some yeast that isn't going to come to lacto and make this taste like shite.
Cup of sugar, pack of bread yeast, 1 gallon jug, looks like 1L or grape and cranberry juice.
Juice is really expensive. I only drink beer and soda because of this. I feel it would make more sence to brew your own liquor straight from raw plant ingredients instead of processed juices
I may have some other useless information mixed in here but this is what I could salvage from my harddrive. Think I moved the big folder to the removable... should check that some time.
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>Giant pile of contaminants

Yeah, your booze list blows. No checks for SG, using bread yeast, etc... Really?

Reminds me of the guys I used to live with who tried to be homebrewers. I used to work at a brewery, would demonstrate how to do it, then watch as they believed everything was sort of magical.

This is how I brew.
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Would you explain why and what sort of yeast should be used. I made delicious mead using many different yeasts and ended up with delicious drunkenness. I am not questioning, just curious.
Can you tell me about effects of "mind fuck coffee?" I don't want to consume a concotion of so many drugs without knowing what their effect will be.
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>all this diabeetus

Here are some healthy alternatives for you exburen/tg/ibbons so you can play 3.5e and bitch about 8th edition 40k into your elder years. (Past the age of 35)

Fruits. Something is always in season, I just picked up 8 lbs of oranges from Walmart for 6 bucks. Peel, seperate into wedges, and chill. Serve on ice to keep them palatable. You can do the same with any other kind of fruit. Check your local flyers, something is always on sale.

Baked Potatoes.
Shit is simple, toss into microwave (lolno) or bake in oven. Slice open after you cook it. Scoop out the insides, mix with a bit of butter, spices, and a tiny bit of mayo (or sour creme) until a thick batter and re-set back into the husks. Sprinkle a little cheese and bake for 10 more minutes. Not the healthiest but it beats poutine sandwich (which looks crazy good but sooo fuckign bad)

Home-Made Yogurt
Yogurt is expensive as fuck but if you're a boss you can make it at home.
See Link: http://www.wikihow.com/Make-Yogurt

Whole Wheat Pasta is cheap as fuck and easy to make. No instructions needed here.

Not much but it can add some cheap variety that isn't amounting to "STEEL CUT OATZ" or diabetuus.
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In the case of your higher acidity concoctions premium yeasts (which actually only cost you about .25 over on most yields) will help you out.

When dealing with fruit-based brews that are going to be more wine than beer I usually consult Keller's list, which is exhaustive and covers your ass for pretty much any blend:

When it comes to Beers? The variants are so wide and your specifics are going to change based on what you come up with. There are rules of thumb but deciding on it is usually best left to your specific needs, pH, qualities you want out of the brew, and specific added components.

My brewmaster was an amateur vintner and winemaker, so he his Book had exact measurements... But getting into that book was a pain in the ass. I stole some recipes but they are all hand-scribbled and cribbed from running brews on my own.

So stop making pruno and start making something more than what a 16 year old drinks. And make sure you clean your shit and use materials that don't leech.
You're cool. =)

>Bitches about fat
>Throws up baked potatoes with mayo (?)


Game Nights are made for decadence. A bottle of port, fine cheese, chocolates, maybe a couple of cigars and a hooker.

The hooker is there to roll the dice right?
You know, that Poutine sandwhich is probably the best serving size you can get. Then again, I'm in Canada. A regular bowl of poutine is the size of your face.
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In her mouth along with my penis.

Until you've had an Monte Cook while smoking a Monte Cristo... You just don't understand higher living.
That recipe for baked potatoes would also work for baked sweet potatoes. Instead of spices and sour cream/mayo, just use honey and cinnamon with the butter.

Also, if you just bake them, they have a tendency to crack, especially in a dry heat like most of the Southern US is in now. Cover them in oil; vegetable, olive, or peanut will work, then wrap them in aluminum foil before you bake them.

The problem with healthy foods is that, well, when most people think healthy, they think spreads of carrot sticks, celery stalks, halved baby tomatoes, ranch dressing or sour cream, all that stuff. Healthy doesn't necessarily mean terrible-tasting, and that's something people need to learn.
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>Points out the only unhealthy option presented
>ignores healthy alternatives of portion control/ingredients

I'm not poor but half these elegan/tg/entlemen are. Just giving some healthy alternatives that won't rape their wallets (so they can buy their overpriced as fuck terminators) and won't give them cardiac arrest.

Cottage Cheese Bowels
If you like the taste of cottage cheese, mix it up by slicing apples (buying sliced pineapples) or other fruit in a bowel with a dabble of cottage cheese on top. Usually isn't too expensive and it can really fill you up.

A dozen eggs costs 2 bucks tops. Give an onion, a green pepper, and soem spices and you can feed 4 people pretty easy. Toast some bread and get a half gallon of milk and that's about 8 bucks to feed 4 people without your taste buds suffering.

Think outside the box, stay away from prepackaged, and hit those flyers/visit farmers markets.

Thanks. I was going for really cheap. Sweet potatoes are definitely the better option and your post is how I usually cook them (I'm in Arizona, learned real fast to oil them) but they tend to be expensive. 4 bucks here gets you a bag of red-skins that will last you a while even with a 4 man group.
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>Cottage Cheese Bowels
>Cottage Cheese Bowels
>Cottage Cheese BOWELS
Quesadillas are awesome, and really easy to make. My personal favorite recipe is as follows:

-A pound or two of chicken breasts or pork chops, whichever floats your boat.
-Tony Chachere's Creole seasoning, or whatever spice mix you want. This stuff is good.
-Tortillas. Don't get anything labeled 'wrap,' because they get marked up. Go down the ethnic aisle and grab something that looks appropriately Mexican.
-Cheese: I use smoked gouda when I have it, but jack or that 4 cheese blend or whatever you have on hand will work fine, probably.
-Bbq sauce

Butterfly the chiggen if you haven't already, and coat everything in your hopefully spicy rub. Let it sit for a bit to get all marinated (and hit room temp, or close to it! This is important, because it makes cooking it a lot easier). Fry 'em up with a little oil in a skillet, let 'em rest, then slice 'em thin. Cut up the pineapple into small chunks, and grate the cheese if needed. Clean the pan, do your dishes, and set everything up so you can have a little assembly line. Just put everything on a tortilla, and either lay another tortilla on top, or fold it in half. Then sit it on the now-clean and oil-free pan until crispy and delicious.
Pimento cheese or ham/chicken/tuna salad are pretty good, relatively cheap, and keep you full while lasting for quite a while in the refrigerator.

Also, making pimento cheese isn't that hard, so you don't even have to pay through the nose for it:

2 cups shredded extra-sharp Cheddar cheese
8 ounces cream cheese, softened
1/2 cup mayonnaise
1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
1/4 teaspoon ground cayenne pepper (optional)
1/4 teaspoon onion powder
1 jalapeno pepper, seeded and minced (optional)
1 (4 ounce) jar diced pimento, drained
salt and black pepper to taste

Put all of that stuff into the bowl of a mixer(or just a bowl) and beat the living hell out of it until it turns into a slightly chunky paste.

Could just be that he misspelled bowls? The W and E keys are right next to each other, so maybe he hit both at the same time and didn't notice?
For your pleasure, the eggs as they are done in my homeland, a trick borrowed from the French, and kept alive in the deep heart of sacred Montenegro, in noble Cetinje, which is eternal.

It is a patriotic dish for those of us whose provinces were under Ottoman rule, for it was forbidden to prepare the butter sauce in this manner, which is called 'Black Butter,' as it was heretical.

You will first take two eggs, and perhaps four tablespoons of butter, and a quantity of sherry not to exceed the teaspoon.

You will first take the single tablespoon of butter and put it in an egg-broiling dish, and melt it in an oven, creating a pool of butter. Into these you will then place the eggs, with yolks unbroken. These you will allow to cook until the whites have set, and then you will spoon the butter underneath over the yolks, and allow further to cook until glazed and bubbling, but not quite set.

Meanwhile, you will take the remaining four tablespoons of butter and clarify them, cooking them in skillet under medium heat until the milk solids contract, and then pouring the clarified solution into the bowl. This you will then return (there should be some solids left, but not many) and cook until golden color. Then, add the tablespoon of sherry (if you are poor, you may use vinegar, but I do not advise this) and remove quickly skillet from fire. There will be some bubbling and maybe conflagration.

You will then remove the egg dish from the oven, and drain of the butter solution it has been basking in. Then, you will quickly pour over the black butter, and consume immediately while still at the hottest possible temperature.

There is no dish anywhere in the Balkans to equal this preparation. The French will espouse often that the basking butter be retained, but this is barbaric and should not be done.
Can I add bacon to this?
I would say no, do not do that, but rather, consume bacon as one dish, and then cleanse your mouth with bread and water before moving on to the eggs.

If you would like I can recommend a recipe for bacon that will optimize your dining pleasure, but first I must go speak with some men about a car towing.
You know those moments where browsing /tg/ seems surreal?

Right there.
I'm reading all of this like Eugene Hutz's character from Everything is Illuminated.

I swear to god, it makes more sense that way.
If I remember correctly, doesn't this just burn?

The recipe is missing something.
Milk and flour. Cookies are bread, and you need milk and flour to make them bread not have them burst into flame.
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Has anyone actually tried this bullshit? I know /tg/ is pretty misogynist but I didn't really consider you guys rapists.
/tg/ is, typically, awkward chubby motherfuckers who hold their liquor like an anemic pre-teen. They'd go down faster than she would.

Even in the case that they don't, they'd either be too drunk to get it all the way up, or wouldn't know what to do with her.

From a mixing standpoint it makes no sense.

Chemically you're making a giant drink that has a low abv.

The simplest, cleanest delivery system for alcohol is the vodka and tonic.

The traditional 'panty dropper' drinks use three things to their advantage:

1.) Carbonation. In actual studies conducted by the University of Manchester alcohol absorption (and thus intoxication) occurs faster with carbonation in the test subjects.

2.) Masking Agents: Anything that masks the strength of the alcohol helps here, but it is best combined with 1 & 3 to get optimum effect as too much of a strong sweet can actually decrease absorption.

3.) Alcohol-to-mixer flavor balance: A good subtly flavored alcohol combined with a well-balanced mixer makes the grade.

Take those three elements and you will get fucked up faster. Citrus and berry flavors work best in this case as they are easily palatable.

You have now learned the secret of every punch, Harry Buffalo, and fancy mixed drink. The perfect stealth drink is one that follows all of these directions and maintains a solid ABV.

Personally? I'd rather just use this as a way to get intoxicated for less money faster than have to try to date rape somebody. But the problem of having belonged to several social groups and, because of my brewing/bartending experience, being put in charge of mixing, is finding that perfect mix. I can put something that kicks like a mule and tastes like candy together... But the damage caused by it...

I felt like the Hotori Honzo of bartending.
uh, fat neckbeards can drink like fratboys
bump for my hungry tummy
Which is to say they have bad taste and zero tolerance.

Your guy's either drink utter shit or whatever you perceive as classy or dwarfy. 99% of the time you guys are horribly misinformed about booze int he first place.
I return, and I musk ask for forgiveness--I did not know that in this country, it is standard doctrine to bounce a man between five agencies in order to take his money.

Now I will not tell you how to make bacon, because if you do not know how to make good bacon, then you are probably a Turk, and nothing I can do will improve your dining experience to begin with.

What you must do is take Georgia ham (in my country this variety of ham is produced in Gacko, but the best is from America, and is fed exclusively on peanuts) of thin-slice variety, perhaps twelve centimeters by eight, and soak it in milk (yes, milk) for an hour.

You will then dry and drain the ham, and broil it under a hot flame for 2-5 minutes to a side. This does not sound like much, but the milk accelerates the cooking process. If you must err on a side, err on overcooked--raw ham is not to be trifled with.

I prefer as sauce a mixture of vinegar, mustard, currant jelly and pepper. The Serbs of Belgrade prefer this with cinnamon, pepper and sea-salt, but I cannot fathom why, as this mixture is clearly superior. Regardless, heat the sauce not even to a simmer, and pour over ham.

I recommend white bread with butter only as companion.
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Yeah, totally. We should all be sipping the maiden cask of a scotch distillery that has never had its name translated out of its traditional obscure Scot dialect, and only once it has been titrated through the inner labia of a blind virgin Inuit and decanted over a series of stones blessed by a 33rd Degree Mason and the blood of the last living unicorn (which is kept on life support somewhere within a mountain of pure cocaine in the deepest mines of Colombia).

Truly a scholar.
That shit's piss water...

>the blood of the last living unicorn (which is kept on life support somewhere within a mountain of pure cocaine in the deepest mines of Colombia).

This makes me want to run a DH game from the perspective of Doom Rider.

Oh, then you're one of those fops who insists on drinking the fermented milk of imported Chechan milk goats possessed by the souls of fallen terrorists and seasoned with a single sprig of the Yar!nklimak, the god-tree of the sub-Saharan Gnostic cult and a single tear from an angel fed on Krispy Kreme donuts and Bengal Tiger liver?

Never became a fan of Monte Cristos. They had a weird mix of mild taste and harsh sting that I never enjoyed. That said, it has been years since I have smoked cigars, so I can't provide good alternatives.

Then you're out of the running for a double Monte unless you're going for a true Cuban experience and eating a Monte Cristo while receiving a Monte Cook.
I've always had a question about preparing meats for quesadillas, tacos, etc.

Is it better to cook the meat and then slice it or would it just be quicker and easier to slice the meat first and then cook it? Assuming we are cooking things in a skillet, of course. Any input?

Did I just fall into some weird time flux where great individuals from the past coexist alongside us, but only through the connection of the internet?
This is all too sugary for my tastes

Personally I believe in the cook then cut school to prevent drying out.

Now if you are cooking in a simmering liquid? This isn't as big of a deal depending on the meat. However, for safety sake, Sear the meat, cook it in your preferred method, then cut the meat to be safe until you learn the archcooking skills.
>archcooking skills

I have never heard of this term. Do tell.

Ehh, just means learn the basics, then work up to being able to do more complex shit. Learn the basic techniques with some cheap cuts of meat, for example, before you ruin a really nice steak for example.

Then, when you can be the master of the range, the grill, the oven, the various tools of the kitchen?

Then you are ready for archcooking.
That makes more sense than that some random montenegrin chef decided to post on /tg/.
>cottage cheese bowls

How about a banana split?

Take a banana, split it in half, put a scoop of cottage cheese between the halves, top off with rainbow jimmies. Grandma always used to make that for me when I was little; it tastes like deliciousness and nostalgia.
Just never, ever do anything like what's happening in the meatbread thread.

Demon Bread, mortal
It hadn't finished its evolution when I posted.

Doing this with sweet potatoes certainly sounds worth trying. Actually, it sounds like a really good idea. I'm only skeptical because I don't think sweet potato skin is as good, and the best thing about twice-baked potatoes is that they're good skin-and-all as finger food. Still sounds pretty tasty though.

Yogurt is a great replacement for sour cream (especially greek yogurt; it's more sour), though I admit, I've never actually tried it in potato.
Glaze the skin with cinnamon butter first.
This shit is pretty simple and relatively hard to really fuck up. As long as you can brown hamburger, you should be fine (which is good, because that's about my skill level).

1 pound of ground beef
2 large onions
1 can of refried beans
1 packet of taco seasoning
a small block of cheddar cheese (preferably medium)
a bag of tortilla chips

1 can of rotel (preferably hot)
1 can of corn
a few habanero peppers (to add spice)

Desirable Condiments:
sour cream
grated cheddar (can use same block as you'll use to make the main dish)
lettuce (this adds a little to the dish, but I don't really miss it when it's not there)

>>20157269 continued
(1) Brown the ground beef (medium heat) most of the way and drain the excess fat.
(2) Add the onions, chopped up.
(3) Cook for a few more minutes, stirring occasionally to make sure nothing burns. You want to cook long enough to soften up the onions a bit, but move to the next step before the meat gets dry or burns.

—Don't worry too much about getting it perfect, this dish is forgiving.—

(4) Now stir in the taco seasoning with the amount of water it tells you to add. If you intend to add a can of rotel, do it now and forget about the water. The rotel should have enough juice to dissolve the taco seasoning. If it doesn't, then sprinkle in water until it works right. Also, add in the chopped up habaneros now, if you intend to.
(5) Continue to heat for a while to cook off the excess water, stirring frequently to make sure everything is equally heated. If it's really soupy, keep the temperature on medium. If it's a little dry at first, reduce the heat to medium-low even or low (you may even want to dribble in a bit more water if necessary). When it's no longer soupy but still moist, it's time to move on. (If it's taking a really long time to cook off the water, it's okay to leave it a bit soupy.)

—Again, don't worry too much about getting shit perfect. It'll still be tasty if it ends up a bit soupy or a bit dry (especially since you should have salsa to add to the finished product).—

(6) Reduce the heat to low, and add in the corn (drained), if you intend to. Then stir in the refried beans (I personally think half a can is plenty, but that leaves you with half a can leftover, so whatever).

(7) Once the refried beans are mixed in, add grated cheddar until the dish tastes right (for me, this is when the whole thing becomes just a little bit orangey).

Kale chips:

Get some kale from the store or local farmer's market. Pull it into small leafy chunks. Brush the chunks with olive oil and put 'em on a cookie sheet. Cook them at 350 for 15 minutes.
Hit these guys with some garlic salt or cayenne pepper to make them extra tasty.
>>20157303 continued
At this point, you're done! Serve to people with tortilla chips that they can use to scoop the stuff up. Some salsa and sour cream on the side that they can also dip in can greatly enhance the dish, and chopped-up lettuce is a nice touch too.

Once you know what you're doing, you may want to consider making a double batch, assuming your frying pan is big enough (if necessary, you can add the refried beans to the (still hot) dish in a separate bowl). It isn't much extra effort and yields you a bunch more food, which keeps fine in the refrigerator and can even be frozen.
Thread turned into a good recipe thread!
Anybody ever actually made a chupaqueso?
This sounds great.
Wait... is this... cheese-filled fried cheese? Because I can't decide whether that's terrible or awesome.
I think, depending on whether you fuck it up, it tends to be either terribly awesome or awesomely terrible.
Indeed it is! It's the Double Down of quesadillas.
Someone archive this or add all this shit to 1d4chan
This next one is a cheap an easy way to feed your friends.

1 jar of peanut butter
1 jar of jelly, jam or fruit preserves
1 loaf of bread

1) Open the bag of bread and remove two slices, placing them side-by-side on a plate.
2) Open the jar of peanut butter and scoop some of its content out with a butter knife.
3) Spread the peanut butter evenly across one piece of bread using the knife.
4) Wipe the excess peanut butter off of your knife using (the (inside of) the lip of the peanut butter jar, or the clean slice of bread.
5) Open the jar of jelly, jam or preserves and scoop some of its contents out using your knife.
6) Spread the fruit product across the (mostly) clean piece of bread in a similar manner to the peanut butter.
7) Wipe the excess jelly, jam or preserves off the knife using (the inside of) the lip of the jar of fruit product.
8) Flip one piece of bread on top of the other so that the peanut butter side is pressed against the fruit product side. Congratulations! You have just created a sandwich!
9) Cut the sandwich in half using your knife. to make it easier to eat.
10) Close you bag of bread, and jars of peanut butter and fruit product.
11) Place your jar of fruit product in the refrigerator, and your bread and peanut butter somewhere you won't trip over them.
12) Eat your sandwich.

You, sir, are a swine. If you were in my proximity, you would feel the swift sting of my backhand.
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I lol'd

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- futaba + yotsuba -
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