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File: 1345767722743.jpg-(87 KB, 520x347, f-14 (1).jpg)
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You've always been a fan of the first evening patrol. Getting to see the sunset from the air is usually stunning, especially out here in the pacific. The sky turning brilliant shades of orange and red and purple, a kind of art no human hand could ever really do justice to. Nighttime flights are gorgeous, true, but the you always thought the sunset patrol was the best of both worlds. Just you and three other people, two aircraft prowling gracefully across the night sky.

Usually, you love it. Tonight? Not so much. Your wingman, still so fresh from advanced flight that you can smell the new on him from here, is one of those magical people who seem to be able to talk endlessly without saying a damned thing. You're pretty sure, after tonight, they're going to have to make you a saint. Assuming you don't go insane and kill him first.

“Hey boss. Might want to hear this” your RIO says, snapping you out of your musing.

“Attention unidentified aircraft! This is Imperial Japanese airspace! Change heading to 090, descend to 10,000 feet, and decrease speed to 200 knots!” a young female voice demands. You snort at the choking noise coming from your wingmate- this is an old game the IJAF and IJN witches like to play. It's technically all very friendly, but it can get pretty intense.

Looks like they're just itching to play though- one of them has already spiked you. It's pre-game, doesn’t count, but it is a challenge. You've got plenty of fuel, and they're approaching from your 11- you'll have to make the merge soon, if you intend to. How do you want to handle this? You've played before, and you're sure you can handle it, but the nugget might have trouble.

[]Professional. This is a completely legal flight, and this game is old
[]Let's dance- if they think they're hard, let's see them back it up
[]Other?
>>
[X ] Do my tax returns.
>>
[X]Let's dance- if they think they're hard, let's see them back it up

Tell the nugget to latch onto your tail and stay there, hard. The game is old, true, but newbie could use the experience.
>>
>>20446029
[x]Professional. This is a completely legal flight, and this game is old

So, what is this? SWQ in the future?
>>
SWQ in the gulf?

N'OO'P HUSSEIN!?
>>
>>20446029

[X]Let's dance- if they think they're hard, let's see them back it up

One of two things can happen.

1-Newbie gets his ass handed to him. Gets his confidance shaken. Starts to take things seriously and maybe even starts talking less.

2-Nebie performs better then expected. He gains some experience.

Win/win sittuation.
>>
>>20446109
GOTTA FIND THOSE MARTIAN WMDS
>>20446029
[X] Tax returns. (Or barring that, Professional
>>
>>20446121

THEY'RE FIELD HOSPITALS WE SWEAR
>>
>>20446029
[X]Let's dance- if they think they're hard, let's see them back it up

Let's shake some of the green off of the new guy. Make sure to warn him before we start tangoing.
>>
File: 1345768425693.jpg-(25 KB, 364x440, 1332635071384.jpg)
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Let's go for a head-on merge with vertical reversal, staying in our wing-pair. If they gain angles we can split up and begin a weave.
>>
>>20446161
>F-14

Um. Okay. Revise that to "make the merge at full Afterburner." Fucking underpowered engines.
>>
>>20446071
>>20446155
>>20446119

Make it happen OP. We need the nugget all grown up by tuesday.
>>
>>20446029
Is this where the AWACS authorises multiple cruise launches targeted on countervalue population centres?
>>
>>20446055
Later, Calculon.
>>
File: 1345769440302.jpg-(114 KB, 1600x1065, f22 raptor with drop tanks.jpg)
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>>20446212

Roger that Skyeye. Mobius 1 engaging.
>>
"Rookie! Dive with me and then burn up to angels"

Rapid descend to below radar level, flip off transponder and active radar. Set Fox-2-Mike to active hot. Skim surface in wide turn toward bogeys. Are they radiating?
>>
>>20446354

Damn i need to listen to some Ace Combat OST again. I am just discovering the epicness of ace combat 5.
>>
>>20446071>>20446155>>20446119

[x]Let's dance- if they think they're hard, let's see them back it up

A feral grin splits your face. You've played this game before and you've come out the better for it more than once. Besides. The nugget needs some experience, and witches are the fastest way to get it. They're tiny, maneuverable, and pack disproportionate firepower. Shields don't usually count, but some of 'em can break locks with their magic (which is total bullshit, but you can't do much there.)

“You want play game?” you ask, over a broadband frequency. Grinning like a retard beneath your mask all the while. “Let's go!”

The nugget, surprisingly sounds...skeptical. “you sure this is a good idea?” he asks, nervousness evident.

It kind of kills the mood. Oh hell, hell no. You know, back on the Saratoga, they're taking bets right now. This will not stand. “Follow my lead and don't fuck this up, kid” You snarl, sweeping your wings back and slamming your throttles forward. You flew the A model for a while- the new B, with the new engines, is a bit of a shock. Underpowered, bullshit. And 'kid', hell. You think he's older than you are.

(1/2)
>>
>>20446466

You've got them in a second, two black dots, screaming past your left wing. Rate of closure was faster than you expected. Your RIO, being the solid individual they are, yells “they've gone vertical” at the same time you yank the stick back into your stomach, cursing. They fucking predicted the move, and if those are 15 model strikers, you might be in a world of shit.

Then again, if those are F-1 Model strikers, this is in the bag. Fucking F1 can't climb for shit.

You're vertical, the kid's stuck with you, and you've got no visual on the two witches, but last you knew, they were vertical themselves, somewhere to your six.

[] Immelman! You've got power on them if those are F1 strikers, and the IJAF just loves domestic tech!
[]Break! If those are F15CF strikers you're in a world of shit, they climb better than you!
[] Other

(2/2)
>>
>>20446474
[x] Thatch Weave - Make 'em come to us
>>
>>20446474
[X] Break! If those are F15CF strikers you're in a world of shit, they climb better than you!

They chose to do this maneuver, they wouldn't pull that if they weren't confident in their climb.
>>
>>20446474
[x] Immelman! You've got power on them if those are F1 strikers, and the IJAF just loves domestic tech!

Nationalism Ho!
>>
>>20446474
[x] Immelman! You've got power on them if those are F1 strikers, and the IJAF just loves domestic tech!
>>
>>20446474
[x]Break! If those are F15CF strikers you're in a world of shit, they climb better than you!
They predicted our first move, and might have been leading us into this.
>>
>>20446029
Please tell me this is a Strike Witches/Yukikaze crossover.
>>
>>20446552
I think this is just Gulf War Strike Witches.
>>
[X] Other
If we're playing, we should play hard. Get the kid to climb, we'll pull off and gain angle on him. Realistically, a horrible idea that makes us a bad person. But if we're just playing... That's a checkmate, right?
>>
>>20446583
We are going for the Witches not the kid.
>>
If we really cared we'd just 5km spaced mid upper atmosphere airburst.

It's the only way to be sure.
>>
>>20446677
What? No, I mean, like, if they take him out then they're in check and stuff right?
That's... That's how this works isn't it?
>>
>>20446756
Sorry, misunderstood your post. You are indeed correct.
>>
>>20446564
That's a shame. The JAM are best enigmatic aliums.
>>
File: 1345773083842.jpg-(31 KB, 415x520, Topgun-F-14-Tomcat-pure-v(...).jpg)
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well, we're tied up with a pair of write in answers, so I'll split the difference.

“Stay vertical, kid!” You order, pulling your own nose past vertical and rolling over. They're still climbing, about 4km out, and in a heartbeat, you've overshot them, cracking the speed of sound. You got a good look, though- those are F-15CF strikers, sure as shit. The two witches are splitting, the lead looks like she's going for the kid, while her wing mate is breaking to get in your 6.

oh, god DAMN it. You'll never live this down, if they claim a kill.

[] get her in close. You've done some spooky shit before, let's see if it was just luck!
[] Try and out run her ass! Those 15s will out climb you, but you're faster! And mach speed drains the bitches faster than it drains you anyway.
[] turn and burn. Try and maneuver for a kill! She can't be that bloody good, right?
[] other
>>
>>20447126
[X] Get her in close. You've done some spooky shit before, let's see if it was just luck!

Let's do this.
>>
>>20447126
[x] get her in close. You've done some spooky shit before, let's see if it was just luck!

Fortune favors the bold.
>>
>>20447126
[X] turn and burn
>>
>>20447126
[x] Get her in close. You've done some spooky shit before, let's see if it was just luck!

Lets Splash her ass!
>>
Pull a hard left-right-left.
Engines on full burn.
Fix the witches in your sight and take 'em from below.

Then wipe your hands, take the control stick, and stop jerking off.
>>
>>20447126
Brake. She wants to catch up?

She'll catch up. Right into our engines.
>>
>>20447276
>Implying we can't multitask
>>
>>20447292
Typing and using proper grammar.
Already failed.
No, I don't believe you could.
>>
File: 1345774087898.jpg-(33 KB, 375x500, Fkingmobius.jpg)
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>>20446354
>>
[] get her in close. You've done some spooky shit before, let's see if it was just luck!

“Uh, boss, you're slowing down” your RIO notes, all insightful-like. “I know” you say, sweeping the wings forward and slowly cutting the throttles back. Hopefully your witch won't notice. You're still maneuvering, preventing a clean shot, but slowing down like this, she'll have energy on you, and be able to dictate the fight.

If she doesn't overshoot.

That's one thing you've always kind of wondered. How the HELL can a witch overshoot when she's got thrust vectoring inherent in her fighter's design? It makes no damn sense. Aerospace engineers drive themselves insane trying to build fighters that can do everything a witch can, and witches don't even use everything they've got at their fingertips. It's kind of funny.

And, in this case, something that's going to win you this little playtime.

“she's getting awful close bo WHUGF!” your RIO is cut off when you yank the stick back into your stomach, cutting the throttles practically to idle as you do so. Your big fighter responds gorgeously, hemorrhaging forward velocity like blood from a severed artery and...

Wait. That analogy sucks. Oh well. No one ever accused you of being a poet.

(1/2)
>>
“boss!” your RIO yells about the same time a loud WHUD sounds throughout your aircraft. “fuck! She midaired us! Engine two is out!”

Your bird is stricken pretty bad- your warning board is lighting up like a fucking Christmas tree. The master fire lights are off, so far, but you can feel some vicious yaw building up, and your right side fuselage weapons stations are dark. When you took off, you had sparrows there.

“Mayday, mayday, mayday” you yell over GUARD, noticing that the engine two master fire warning is now lit. “gunfighter 2-1 has been maidaired! One IJAF witch in the drink!”

shit. The CAG is NOT going to be pleased about this. At least you can claim this as a win, right?

[] Eject! Eject! Get out of that bird!
[] Fuck you, I don't own this damn thing, and there's an IJN airfield not too fucking far, I can make it.
[] the sara isn't that damn far. I can get it home!
[] other!

(2/2)
>>
>>20447749
[X] the sara isn't that damn far. I can get it home!
>>
>>20447749
[X] the sara isn't that damn far. I can get it home!
>>
>>20447749
[x] the sara isn't that damn far. I can get it home!
Come on, we've still got Engine 1.
>>
>>20447749
[] Eject! Eject! Get out of that bird!
[] Fuck you, I don't own this damn thing, and there's an IJN airfield not too fucking far, I can make it.
[] the sara isn't that damn far. I can get it home!
[x] Kick off the fire extinguisher and kill fuel flow to that engine, adjust yaw-trim to compensate for the engine being out. It should be manageable. Try to limp it home to the Sara but keep in mind an alternate landing site. Have RIO watch the fuel management panel and start pumping fuel into the centerline tank if needed from any effected wing tank.
>>
>>20447749
[X] the sara isn't that damn far. I can get it home!

We're screwed, leg it!
>>
>>20447984
what this lesbian said
>>
>>20447984

I like this one.
>>
>>20447984

This guy seems legit. I vote with him.
>>
File: 1345777883157.jpg-(99 KB, 850x499, Ice and Slider.jpg)
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[] the sara isn't that damn far. I can get it home!

You'd always heard stories, ya know, of old timers bringing in prop jobs with horrific battle damage. You've even heard a few of those self same old times saying no modern jet could fly with holes ripped in them the same way their birds could (and, apparently, did)

You've never, ever believed a word of that tripe. They flew with their canopies open over water, for christ's sake, in case they went down in the drink and had to leave a sinking aircraft. Yeah, that's sure faith in their airframe! Hah!

Fuckers.

You hammer the fire extinguishers, and are rewarded when the fire warnings go out. Someone's yelling over the radios. A bunch of someones, actually.

“What the FUCK do you want?” you growl, leveling out. #1's still in good shape, and your RIO knows the business- you can feel your Center of gravity shifting as fuel is transferred into undamaged tanks. You've managed to cancel that yaw, and rolled wings-level, turning back towards the sara. You've got enough altitude and fuel left to make it, even if landing is going to be dicey.

“Nice, Lieutenant. Next time, Try and act like a naval aviator instead of a child” a cool voice says. “Let me have a look”

Fuck. Ice. You look around, wildly, trying to spot the white-haired bitch, but she's either below you, or still out of visual range, yet. Still, better her than...

"hah! I TOLD YOU" A different voice cuts in. welp. the whole gang is here, you guess, though. At least Mitchell has the decency to fly a fucking 14.

[] HAHA, NO, WE'RE FINE, GO CHECK THE NUGGET! NO REALLY WE'RE FINE.
[].... fuck
[] shit, if ice is here, that means slider isn't far behind
[] Other!
>>
>>20448390
"Eat dicks, ma'am. Go check the bitch in the water."
>>
>>20448390
>[] HAHA, NO, WE'RE FINE, GO CHECK THE NUGGET! NO REALLY WE'RE FINE.
>>
>>20448390
[x] HAHA, NO, WE'RE FINE, GO CHECK THE NUGGET! NO REALLY WE'RE FINE.
And check on that downed IJAF Witch.
>>
[x] HAHA, NO, WE'RE FINE, GO CHECK THE NUGGET! NO REALLY WE'RE FINE.
>>
>>20448390
>[x]Other
>"Go check on the witch in the drink, we'll be fine, no really"
>>
>>20448524

Seconding
>>
>>20448572
This. Give up some altitude to try and deice.
>>
File: 1345780143833.jpg-(92 KB, 850x499, Maverick and Goose.jpg)
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[x] HAHA, NO, WE'RE FINE, GO CHECK THE NUGGET! NO REALLY WE'RE FINE
[x] Other! (go check on the Witch in the drink)

“with all due respect MA'AM” you say through gritted teeth. “MY bird is still in the air. There's a witch in the drink. Go check on HER before you worry about ME, 'k?”

“tch.” There! You see her. She's shaking her head. “You think I didn't already take care of that? The chopper is on the way already, and Maverick and Goose are making a flyby right...”

She's cut off by maverick- Patty Mitchell. Supposedly, her dad flew with your mom years ago.

“She's kinda cute. Want us to hang out till the chopper gets here?” the blonde asks. “bleeding a little, musta used her sheild to punch through the bird though, doesn't look too bad.” She'd be cute, if it wasn't for all the lumberjack bullshit she wore off-duty. Makes ya wonder, ya know?

(1/2)
>>
Ice- also known as Tabitha Kazanski (lieutenant commander Tabitha Kazanski) is glaring daggers at you. You can tell, without bloody looking, because it makes your skin crawl. “yes, do that. I'm going to stick with Gunfighter back to the carrier. Slider can finish the patrol with the nugget.” she says, voice promising a shouting match back on deck.

Which, to be fair, is starting to look fairly likely. You've got a bent bird, sure, but it's flying ok, everything considered. Your wings are locked at no sweep, but that's fine, not like you're going fast anyway. Reaching over, you jettison your weapons- there's a few hundred pounds less to worry about.

You've got this shit in the bag.

It takes a few minutes, but the Sara's battlegroup crawls into view. It's a struggle, but you manage to line up- and somewhere along the way, notice the deck is clear. “Gunfighter 2-1, call the ball”

And the fire warning for #1 lights up.

Distance to the carrier is short, you're damn near positive you can get it in, and gods know the shipboard legends will be incredible if you land this bird.

at the same time, if that's a legit fire and not just a system glitch, you're dead as shit if you try to ride it in.

man, tough choice

[] Up yours, fate, I'm bringing this bird home.
[] mmmmnope. We're outta here.
[] It's a system glitch. Gotta be.
[] other

(2/2)
>>
>>20449021
[X] other

Radio to anyone who's nearby and can take a quick look.

Hi, is engine #1 on fire? Because I'd really like a second opinion on that.
>>
[x] Up yours, fate, I'm bringing this bird home.
>>
>>20449021
What >>20449078 said
>>
>>20449078

Switching my vote to this from >>20449093
>>
>>20449078
This and then bring er home
>>
>>20449021
While >>20449078 is certainly the REASONABLE answer, fuck that.
>[] Up yours, fate, I'm bringing this bird home.
>>
>>20449078
This.
>>
What the fuck is this all about holy shit

i'm reading but the point is flying over my head

Are we talking about airplanes or magical girls

I'm confused
>>
>>20449078
>>20449093

Why not both? If we are on fire, we can at least have the fire-suppression foam party crew waiting for us.

Also, I am not very familiar with modern aircraft engine fire suppression systems. Any chance we can trigger it without powering down the turbine? The size and location of the hypothetical fire are going to make a big difference in how boned we are.
>>
File: 1345782266253.jpg-(222 KB, 760x500, F14-Tomcat.jpg)
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[x] other

While you'd sooner die than owe the bitch a damned thing, you have your aircrew to look after.

“Ice, am I on fire?” you ask, almost sweetly. You can hear her snort over the radio.

… just like the rest of flight control.

“no” she says, edging closer and rolling over the top of your fighter, positing herself just above and behind your left side tail. “you look ok.”

You have to choke back a 'that's what she said'. she ranks you, afterall. plus, you don't like her enough for much humor.

your gear and tailhook locked down, no problem- thank the gods for small favors, right? And with a clear deck, it's about the easiest landing you could hope for. The fire warning light stays lit, all the way in, but you figure it's a systems issue, not an actual fire. Shit, you just got hit, midair, by a witch doing nearly mach 1, it's amazing your bird didn't come apart.

You catch the #2 wire, which, while not perfect, isn't bad. The ground crew guides your bird to an elevator- normally, you'd shut down on deck, but the evening's been exciting, and besides, they're just saving themselves effort anyhow.

Your crew chief- who's apparently torn between wanting to murder you and wanting to kiss you, makes the chopping motions with his hands to signal you to cut off your remaining engine.

As soon as your boots hit the deck, you're covered in fireretardant foam.

“YOU SAID YOU WERE ON FIRE, SIR!” someone shouts. You know that voice. That's.....

another blast of foam hits you. “STOP DROP AND ROLL, SIR!”

Fucking marines.

What idiot let them out of their pen anyway?

[] I WILL SLAY YOU
[] Better at least Try and explain this to the boss. Before Ice does.
[] Nope. Dripping firefighting foam every where I walk. Maybe the fucking jarheads will have to clean it up
[] other?
>>
>>20449321
Little of column A, little of column B.
>>
>>20449480
[X] Nope. Dripping firefighting foam every where I walk. Maybe the fucking jarheads will have to clean it up

Act as if we were never sprayed. Head to the boss to explain ourself. Act confused if anyone comments on us being covered in foam.
>>
>>20449480
>[] Better at least Try and explain this to the boss. Before Ice does.
>>
[x] Nope. Dripping firefighting foam every where I walk. Maybe the fucking jarheads will have to clean it up

Deal with it, filthy landwalkers.
>>
>>20449571
This. Also we have to give them a BIIIIIG HUUUUG. I"M SO GLAD YOU CARE SO MUCH ABOUT MY SAFETY!
>>
>>20449536
>>20449571

And not a fuck was given that day.

But we probably should go see the bossman. We are getting chewed out no matter what. Might as well get it over with.

On a side note, we will need to find a way to screw these marines over. I vote something light-hearted like finding their porn stash and replacing it with crudely draw penises. That might be to subtle though.
>>
>>20449480
B and C, like >>20449536 said!
>>
[x] Nope. Dripping firefighting foam every where I walk. Maybe the fucking jarheads will have to clean it up

A normal human being, let alone a naval aviator officer-and-gentleman, would probably clean up, at least a little, before reporting for an ass-chewing.

But, as you stand there, on the flight deck, in your own provate mountain of firefighting foam, you realise one important thing.

You've failed to dredge any care from giveafuck bay. The supply shipment of care was brutally torpedoed by jerry, and the flight is long overdue.

You look at the laughing marines. You stare at them, eyes completely dead and lifeless. Their laughter slowly... painfully... ebbs away. You continue staring at them, flight suit soaked through, now, as they shuffle uncomfortably.

They know. Oh, they know.

(1/2)
>>
File: 1345784523697.jpg-(195 KB, 342x800, Merlin.jpg)
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>>20449962

Which is why they're both surprised as all HELL when you hug them, both, crushing their heads against your chest. “GUYS! YOU GUYS CARE!” you throw in a fake sniff, easily holding them against their feeble attempts at escape “I DIDN'T THINK YOU CARED! IMAGINE! ENLISTED MARINES CARING ABOUT A NAVY OFFICER! ABOUT A NAVY ~PILOT~ YOU GUYS!”

The last bit was too much. Their efforts redouble, their panic nearly palpable. They're both bigger than you, and manage to break free. They look at each other with wordless horror- if word ever got out... !

You swear, they run faster than the fucking roadrunner.

Your RIO deplaned after you, and avoided the firefighting foam easily enough. “well” she says, sighing. “let's go see stinger. You know he's not going to be happy. And Ice was headed down there”

“when the hell did she land?” you ask, making no effort to brush the foam off yourself. None got in your eyes- you had your helmet's visor down- and your head escaped, for the most part, but the stuff is clingy. Small white tufts of foam mark your path from the flight deck down to your commander's office.

Your RIO shrugs as you pull up outside the closed door. “Right after us, I guess.”

“Awesome.”

She looks back at you. “We're boned, aren't we?”

[] yep!
[] nope!
[] let me handle the talking. You just be cute.
[] other!
>>
>>20449978
[x] yep!

Embrace the suck.
>>
>>20449978
We're utterly boned (Name of RIO), but I have a plan.

You look adorable, I want the whole nine yards, puppy dog eyes, looking at the floor all sad, that thing where you have you look like you're nervously shifting your weight.

I'll talk to them and do what they don't expect. Calmly explain the situation and the reasoning behind my actions.

We're still boned but this might mitigate it some.
>>
>>20449978
>[] let me handle the talking. You just be cute.
It's like a big red button, that I must press.
>>
>>20449978
>[] let me handle the talking. You just be cute.
Between the fire retardant and puppy dogging RIO we might be able to avoid the worst. Maybe.
>>
>>20450084
Wait, no. Can we make a snowman and present it as a gift?
>>
File: 1345787313768.jpg-(197 KB, 351x800, yeah, she's probably goin(...).jpg)
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[x] let me handle the talking. You just be cute.

She's cute when she gets like that. This whole 'military' thing still scares her some days, you're pretty sure. You grin and flash a thumbs-up. “You let me do the talking. You just keep looking cute. Like you lost your puppy or something”

“I hate dogs”

“oh for fucks... fine. Your kitten.”

“Merlin! Get in here! Bring that dumbassed pilot of yours too!” Stinger yells. You know, for a short bald dude, he sure sounds a lot taller.

His office is cloudy with blue cigar smoke. And overly warm. And Ice is standing right there.

Well... fuck. Yep. You're boned. She's immune to your RIO's cuteness.

Your Boss- Stinger- sits down at his desk, sighing.

“What you did tonight took an incredible amount of skill. Lieutenant commander Kazanski just got done telling me about the visible damage to your bird. I'm sure the maintenance report will land on my desk tomorrow morning will tell me that that bird should have never made it home.” He pauses, chewing on a cigar.

(1/2)
>>
File: 1345787436840.jpg-(181 KB, 338x800, and her.jpg)
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“Now, what the FUCK were you doing? You know that that plane isn't yours! That thing belongs to the taxpayers! It is not a personal fucking toy! Especially not to flirt with fucking japs! What the hell is your problem, son? You've been busted, lost your wings twice now, and you've got a history of high speed passes over air control towers and” he pauses, looking down at something.

“and one admiral's daughter!”

Merlin looks at you In disbelief. “before your time” you say out the corner of your mouth.

He holds his head in his hands. “I'm going to regret this, I know I am.”

He stops, stands up, and looks at you. “I gotta send some pilot from this squadron to Miramar. You're the best Steelwing I've got, so you're going.”

Miramar. Navy Fighter Weapons school. Top Gun.

You feel dizzy. You barely hear anything past that.

It's a dream shot. Once in a lifetime. The best in the world go there.

Merlin looks distinctly worried. Ice looks disgusted.

[] SQUEEEE
[] maintain professionalism until safely in quarters. Then squeee.
[] sir, I made you a snowman out of firefighting foam. Take it, cherish it, for you have made me the happiest individual on this boat. Let this snowman be a reminder of that, always.
[] other?

(2/2)
>>
>>20450551
>[] sir, I made you a snowman out of firefighting foam. Take it, cherish it, for you have made me the happiest individual on this boat. Let this snowman be a reminder of that, always.
Squee within hearing distance of door after leaving.
>>
>>20450551
[x] maintain professionalism until safely in quarters. Then squeee.
Not gonna give Ice the satisfaction.
>>
>>20450551
[x] Other/Professional
Sir, it is an honor. Do I get to keep Merlin with me as she is the most reliable RIO I have ever worked with.
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>>20450551
>[] sir, I made you a snowman out of firefighting foam. Take it, cherish it, for you have made me the happiest individual on this boat. Let this snowman be a reminder of that, always.
How can it be anything else?
>>
[x] maintain professionalism
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>>20450709
cause we're fucking badasses...
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>>20450736
I've always preferred smartass to badass myself. Lip service is so much easier than speaking with action.
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OMG SWQ TOPGUN WE ARE TOM CRUISE I CAME BUCKETS
Ahem I mean, [x] maintain professionalism until safely in quarters. Then squeee.
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>>20450551

(X) foam snow man

The correct answer is porfessional and private squee, but I cannot let the absurdist choice pass in good conscience. Our RIO is coming with us, right? We need our wingwoman with us. The traditional homoerotic overtones of pilot talk will be somewhat lost though. A small price to pay I suppose.

Also, did you make all the pictures for this? Or was this a thing found on the interwebs? I am curious. One implies way more effort than the other.
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File: 1345790067395.jpg-(219 KB, 344x800, Slider is a bit weird.jpg)
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Looks pretty tied up, so we'll use both

[x] maintain professionalism until safely in quarters. Then squeee.
[x] sir, I made you a snowman out of firefighting foam. Take it, cherish it, for you have made me the happiest individual on this boat. Let this snowman be a reminder of that, always.

“Thank you sir!” you belt out, falling back on the last thing your joy-soaked brain can find: professionalism. He looks rather surprised.

“what? No smartass comment?” He looks at Merlin, who's looking at you, worry evident on her features. “I think we broke him. Make sure he makes it to his rack, will you? And... hose him off or something. That foam can eat skin if it's left on long enough. Dismissed”

Your RIO, good crew that she is, does just that- leading you, still in a delirious state to the hangar deck.

Wait... hangar deck? Oh crap!
You manage to get the thought out, but no farther, as you're blasted by a high-pressure firefighting hose from about 50 feet away.

(1/2)

>>20450769
Was directed to them online. I Wish I had artistic talent like that.
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File: 1345790144904.jpg-(72 KB, 900x602, your chariot awaits.jpg)
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A mustachioed man is laughing manically as he hoses you down, sending your ass skidding and sputtering to stop against the nose wheel of a parked fighter.

The ice cold water is cut off, mercifully, and your crew chief, who had been directing the hose, helps you up. You regard him, sourly. He laughs, and makes a show of dusting you off. “That was for the hole in my bird. MY bird. YOU just get to play with it. It's MINE.” he says, still laughing.

“also: the boys in the flight ops room decided to class your little 'informal training session' as a draw.” something in your brain, already desperately trying to handle the overflow of good news, pops. Fuses blow out under the load, circuit breakers trip over, and the whole thing SCRAMS, seeking an emergency shutdown state. The next hour or so is a solid blur.

Merlin convinces one of the ordinance techs to carry you to your room and drop you, still in a soaked flightsuit, unceremoniously on your rack.

Damn... you wanted to make a snowman for stinger. Guess he'll have to settle with you making trouble somewhere else for a few weeks.

… too bad the rest of the squadron is coming. You were looking forward to not having to deal with them.

The next morning, the carrier has is docked at Yokosuka, the international naval dock the IJN keeps for allied nations. You have time to make a hasty scribble of a snowman, with a little speech bubble above him saying “I'm a happy snowman! Because I get to go to TOP GUN” that you tape to stinger's office door.

Gathering your kit, you head out to the flight deck... to see C-2A spooling up.

Fuck. Too much to hope you could fly there, wasn't it?

(2/2)
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And, with 0300 rapidly approaching, I need to call it a night, here.

Not sure when I'll get a chance to run again, but I'll shoot for sometime late next week.
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>>20451059
Good show, sir. It was most amusing.
>>
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZBoiW460nU

obligatory


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