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/tg/ - Traditional Games


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Suddenly, a wizard appears and transports you to a magical fantasy world. You carry only what you would carry with you on a normal day out of the house, and you are completely unprepared for the fact.

You appear in a rural, human-owned area, with no clue where you are. Strangely the locals seems to be speaking English. There does not seem to be any way to return to earth. How will you go about your existence in this strange new world?

What will you do to survive, what skills do you have which can be useful to either make a living or simply survive out in the world? What items do you have that might make a difference for you. Will you take up a profession, settle down, or travel the world?
>>
high or low fantasy/magic
>>
I need to get to a capital city as soon as possible. As dull as it might be, I could probably handle being a pencil pusher of some kind. Being literate will probably help with that.
>>
I'm an EMT and I've got a lot of health policy classes under my belt. I suppose I could set up a health insurance company. With any luck, I'll be carrying a strain of common cold or flu that the malnourished peasants will have no resistance to, causing a plague to appear out of nowhere which I can then halt it with proper quarantine and sanitation methods, quickly increasing my influence.
>>
>>20660888

As high or as low as you like. The question is, how would you handle yourself stuck in a fantasy world.
>>
I will bring them the joys of basic electro-chemistry and with it the first batteries.

while that I might as well learn some goddamn magics.
>>
>>20660936
preferably i'd get a lamia girl so i wouldn't have to handle myself
>>
>>20660940

could you honestly say that you could make a battery, without the modern tools and materials?
>>
If I can find a university or some other place of learnings I can impress the people there with my magical math skills and hopefully they'll accept me. If not then I'm fucked.
>>
>>20660947

Yeah, your fetishes notwithstanding.
>>
I know a little about metal-working, and how to make and safely mass-produce black powder in medieval conditions.

I will attempt to team up with a blacksmith and sell my expertise to a king; I will need many apprentices because finding an alloy safe for gun barrels will kill most of them.
>>
As someone else said, literacy is probably my most valuable asset depending on setting.

I'd get a quiet job and save up, then go walkabout for a bit. Find out the state of the kingdom, its politics, its strength, the high/low magic of the world. Find out what I know that they don't and vice versa.

If the age is a tyranny, use my relatively advanced knowledge of political science, warfare and psychology to lead a peasant uprising. If the age is a benevolent one, find a pencil-pushing job and a redheaded baker's daughter.
>>
I'm a little old, but becoming an apprentice of some kind would be my best bet. Preferably a Wizard's apprentice, because magic. Barring that, become a squire for a knight of little renown and be trained with sword and bow. Then, wander the world to seek my fortune.

You know, standard Adventurer stuff.

Although,>>20660972
might need an extra pair of hands.
>>
I have basic tools, training, knowledge of how to work/make low-tech tools, and a huge amount of knowledge, most of it useless in fantasy.

First thing I'd do would be to trade whatever I can part with for something to make money with. More tools, perhaps.
Then I'd find somewhere to eat and sleep.
After that, I'd set about trying to make local currency.

After getting suitable equipment (tools, cheap-but-effective armour, a weapon I can use, local clothes, etc.), I'd set off for the nearest big town. Find someone who can grind lenses, and a blacksmith. Because if my glasses break, I am fucked, and will need spares.
I'd then go wander the earth for a while, before settling down somewhere with a job or a plot of land to work, and maybe a waifu. Then wanderlust would kick in, and I'd wander off for a while before returning or settling elsewhere.
Maybe I'd try and learn this magic stuff, if it's possible.
>>
I become a story teller, introducing groundbreaking concepts of science fiction to the world to earn coin from the awestruck noble class, who will consider my ideas a supreme novelty.

Find the local monks, or whatever they call the learned know-it-all's, and share my 21st century science with them as well. The knowledge that germs exist alone, as well as antibiotic principals, should be groundbreaking. Thanks, bees!

Now that I have proven myself as a man of intelligence, knowing things beyond the mortal ken, I can hopefully convince a wizard that I am a capable apprentice.

Then I become a wizard who also knows science.

Then I win.
>>
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>>20660999

If all of /tg/ is sent back we'll probably instinctively form four-man adventuring bands and attempt to overthrow the kingdom.
>>
Depending on how methodological the magic is, I could become a wizard fairly easy.
Instead of being a scientist, I'll be a SCIENCE!..tist
With magic.
>>
>>20660866
im traumatologist and im working with police, i know a few things about chemistry/physics/criminology
i often carry a hand recharger for phone because i never remember to charge it.
>>
>>20660954
We made batteries the first time without modern tools or materials. All you need is a vat of acid and a rod of nickel to make a battery.
>>
as an engineer, i would create electrical generators and usher the world into a new era. that or become a wizard. or both
>>
>>20661015
Right. So we can have gay marriage or something else redundant.
Dat thread yesterday, mang. That was some amusing shit.
>>20660972
Steel is an alloy. Steel was used for black powder handgun barrels. Bronze was used for cannons.
>>
Use my knowledge of basic chemistry to dominate the world!
>>
i'd die like the level 1 commoner i am, possibly to a housecat
>>
>>20660936
If the technological and magical level of that society is left to my own choice, I'll go for very high in both domains, and enjoy my eternal post-scarcity life adventuring in more or less real alternate universes, with the suppport of the rest of society.
>>
English isn't my mother tongue, so I would probably sound like a retarded person.
First I need to find out about religion, type of government and local customs. Maybe some things I usually carry with me would be considered heretical. Then I would try to find out something about local fauna and flora and if I were familiar with it, I'd probably start business as a herbal doctor.
>>
>>20661015
Well, yeah, probably. I mean, who really wants a boring life as a farmer or whatever? I'm a PC, I demand high adventure and danger.
Besides, overthrowing tyrannical kings is what we do best.
I mean, besides not finishing projects, arguing over pointless crap, and fapping to dark-skinned elf girls.
>>
>>20661038
acid works, but there are other good salts to use. also graphite works, gold is awesome.

also, you need two vats if we're being exact.
>>
I would seek out a wizard and tell him what happened to me tell him about my world and offer him to trade the knowledge I have in exchange for him allowing me to be his apprentice then after finishing my wizardish education I would become a court wizard to a king because kings love novelty and a wizard born and raised in a different universe is the absolute novelty
>>
>>20661051
given a choice between bettering an entire world or becoming a wizard, I'd go with the one that gives you a neat hat.
>>
Rape the maids.
>>
I'd probably sell my high quality denim pants for enough money to get adventuring gear
>>
>>20660866

Isn't that The Mountain that Rides?
>>
>Learn magic
>Train with magic
>Find wizard who brought me here
>Punch him in the dick
>Thank him
>>
Find kings, tell them the truth that I was sent by a wizard.

Explain to them that in my land, kings and generals resolve conflict via miniatured versions of conflict. Tabletop war is as valid tactically as the real thing, but at a minimum of the cost. Convince other kings of the realm that instead of waging long and expensive wars, they can settle it this way.

"But wait," they will say, "how do we know what unit does what? How shall it be impartial?" and I shall say to them, an order will appear to you with codexes for your armies after carefully considering your capabilities and your units, and you will know them by their neckbeards.

Then troll them with new codexes constantly.
>>
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>Find elf
>Rub ears
Nothing else matters.
>>
>>20661412
except for getting charged with rape
>>
I'm Asian and therefore have ninjas in my blood. Thesecond thing I'd do is steal some starting equipment, after saying "SAVE THE GAME" into my phone.
>>
>>20661420
Not rape if it's an elf, etc. etc.
>>
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Attend bard college
Travel to desert
Find thri-kreen waifu
>>
>Learn basic sparkmagic
>Acquire some rods of steel and a vacuum spell or something similar
>Invent magic-fueled Welding
>>
I have nothing of any particular use around. I have basic knowledge of biology and medicine which would probably be fairly advanced by this time period, but nothing exceptional.
I'll either get raped and die, or try and get married to a man with some basic personal hygiene.
>>
>>20661420
just keep rubbing till she likes it
it's not rape if you mindbreak them right
also because it's an elf
>>
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>>20661420
Its not rape if its an elf.

Besides, I would totally romance dem ears beforehand, I just would not rest until I rub them. Thats my endgame in this scenario. You overthrow your kings and invent your guns, I'm gonna be over here in the forest, rubbing my elf's ears. Preferrably brown elf, but I'm not picky.
>>
>>20661447
thrallherd is best prc
>>20661448
then you should have included at least one more step, even if that step was ????
>>
>>20661395
....
....
Glorious.

I imagine a future where everyone settles everything in holographic wargame arenas. The whole world pivots around the games.

This is my new setting.
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>>20661466
The ultimate plan is still the same
>Find elf
>Rub ears
Thats my entire plan for this fantasy world. How I go about it is irrelevant.
>>
> Be diabetic
> Probably die after one or two weeks unless I find a cleric that can cure me
>>
>>20661492

What if you get killed for rubbing ears?
>>
>>20661431
>thri-kreen waifu wearing a dress with genital chamber access
You, sir, are quite classy. I'd marry the fuck out of that Thri-kreen.
>>
So I'm not a fa/tg/uy, not a /tg/ regular at all, so why would you rub elf ears?
>>
>>20661395
Thus the whole world over fell under the thrall of the terrible wizard known only as the Codicer and his Wardian Knights.
>>
>>20661510
Thats a pouch, you dunce.
>>
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>>20661510
>genital chamber access

You mean that pocket on her apron?

No sir, thri-kreen genitals are on the tip of the abdomen, which is behind her back. That's just a pocket.
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>>20661503
Then I shall have died a man.
>mfw
>>
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>>20661503
Then they leave me no choice. Consensual sex in the missionary position for the purpose of procreation so I can have a half-elf daughter instead.
>>
Skills i was a carpenter by trade before joining the military. these days i carry my personal fire arm, gerber, and my back pack with note books scetch pad and lap top.
While tge lap top would be useless fter 24 hours the rest would be pretty handy. prolly set my self up building houses. the gun would keep me safe for at least 15 rounds.
>>
>There does not seem to be any way to return to earth
Kill myself.
>>
>>20660908
The funny thing is you're probably carrying something that could still cause a plague in a fantasy world but your immune system doesn't even have to try to keep it down.
>>
Can I choose what Fantasy World I'm sent to?
>>
So I'd have on me:
Small white LED flashlight, Swiss Army knife, chapstick, Wallet and Cellphone.
I'd probably just drop the Cellphone and wallet, no point.
I would hope I bring a bag of dice, head to a city and make some coin from low luck drunks
>>
what I wear around the house?
well, jeans, combat boots, t-shirt and light hoodie, 2 multi-tools and a lighter.
man, I am fucked.
I have certain skills that are useful, but in a pre-industrial world?
probably dead from illness, hunger, injury, bandits, all sorts.
if I manage to survive, I could make a living doing cheap medical work if the magic level is low enough, or I could do scholarly work, I can write, I have a large vocabulary, I'm good at talking to people and I have an alright memory, ranging to excellent when I'm remembering written information.
>>
>>20661534
>>20661536

Why would you do that? Just find a nice human girl in the village you appeared at.
>>
>>20661501
Unless they've reached Avicenna-level medical knowledge. In which case your life will still suck, but be considerably longer.
http://www.news-medical.net/health/History-of-Diabetes.aspx
>>
>>20660866
Considering my current job, I would introduce forensics to the local law enforcement. At that point, I'm either executed for rampant witchcraft or hopefully obtain some kind of minor political position. Then, I introduce proper dental hygiene.
>>
>>20661553

>realize you were summoned to be a living biological weapon
>>
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>>20661568
>why not human girl
>>
>>20661536


So you can rub her ears in a "Totally-fatherly-and-non-sexual-way"?
>>
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>>20661568
Humans don't have dem ears.
>>20661590
Actually, I think I would go for a pointy earned lamia before an elf.
>>
I wear a small backpack to work, often with a few notebooks and drawing paper in it. That's about the only thing that would be useful in some way...wallet, money, keys, phone, Mp3 player...all useless junk.

So unless I can learn some magical way to charge my electronics and become a wandering bard, I'm probably going to end up a messenger, carrying small parcels around in a shoulder slung bag.
>>
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>>20660954
once I explained to the alchemist what chemicals I wanted, yes
also I could cannibalise my everyday electronics into a motor all be at a little one I'm sure I could use that to be burnt as a witch become the court magister.

ps. assuming google isn't lying to me
aes cyprium = copper
blue stone = copper sulfate
flower of zinc = zinc oxide (which can be thermally dissociated into zinc)
and foam of niter for my salt bridge

pps.
realistically I'd die of cholera
>>
Well I don't carry that much with me, and my laptop would be pretty useless pretty quickly. So find wizard, obtain wizardry, or hell just experiment to discover magic myself. Also, life of crime, knowing what I know about modern crime I would be well suited to stealing form anyone who doesn't have magic to track down thieves, because without modern science or magic you shan't catch me.

also find elf, rub ears, preferably consensually
>>
>>20661590
>>20661601

You heretics! You're trying to kill off the human race by making half-breeds!
>>
My standard equipment are some high level physics and chemistry books and a laptop. Well I guess become a wizard and shit then hope that I can use magic to create tech without having one nullify the other's power.
>>
Right, seeing as how I resemble one of Nurgle's chosen internally, man I regret my 24th birthday, I'd become a folk legend, the man in green who carries death on his breath.

Everything I'd sneeze on would be dead in weeks.

I even caught the bubonic plague in eastern Europe.

Fuck, even if they did kill me my blood would be nigh-on toxic.
>>
I'd probably make my way to the nearest cathedral and ask if they need my skills as a scribe. Cloistered Cleric here I come!
>>
>>20661612
to be fair, i've had a vasectomy, so i should be able to fuck the snake girl
>>
>>20661630

Oh. Well, so long as you can't make any half-breeds.
>>
>>20661612

Just because you produce a half-breed daughter doesn't mean you can't produce a human one as well.
>>
>>20661638

We need more humans. Why have one half-breed and one human kid when you can have two human kids? You're a bunch of heretics!
>>
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>>20661612
I pass the same number of genes to my offspring regardless of what the mother's genome looks like, so from a biological point of view it matters little what I breed with, so long as I produce children.
>>
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>>20661612
And I should care why? More monstars for everyone!
>>
Immediately go to nearest royalty, offer my services as a highly educated engineer to become the equivolent of Leonardo DaVinci by ripping off known machines from the future. Get rich as hell off guns and cannons and the such. Get kidnapped repeatedly by warring nations for my intellect and known lack of loyalty because of kidnappings, get assassinated so rival nation can't kidnap me. Worth it?
>>
>>20661612
>He doesn't want to prove that humans are superior for being able to make so many half breeds
>He doesn't want to have a harem of women and group of lovely half breed children
>He doesn't want to spread peace and love
>>
>>20661648

But the number of human kids a man can produce is relative to the number of human females he can breed with. If you have an elf, a lamia and a human girl, why not breed with all three? (other that having to care for three kids but whatever.
>>
>>20661678
Its not his fault, he is stuck in HURRESY mode from 40K.
>>
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>>20661593
Naturally.

>>20661568
Because DAMN!
>>
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>all this half-breed talk

Prezygotic barriers man, just go for it
>>
>>20661688

Because the human child would think it's okay to breed with monsters. Soon, years down the line, and if nobody did anything, all humans would breed with monsters and die out because a half-breed child takes more from the monster than the human.

I care for the survival of the human race.
>>
I still don't get why you want to rub elf ears.
>>
>>20661699
DAMN! is right. Yo' elf so fat, she got her own marching order!
>>
>>20661717

Then help me out with my alchemy and wizardry so we might make humans immortal.

>>20661723

You gay son?
>>
>>20661736

No, I just want to understand why the love for rubbing elf ears.
>>
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>>20661699
You want to see DAYUM!, I got DAYUM!
>>20661723
Because dem ears, mang.
>>20661726
Don't be talking bout brown elves like that.
>>
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I'd have a bunch of art materials, a lot of printer paper [both used and clean], my cellphone+earphones, my wallet with a bunch of meaningless green paper and overdated condoms, a few flyers, possibly also a x-acto knife, an utility knife, a swiss knife and a medium sized fantasy book.

My skills would include college-level knowledge in graphic [though that's quite useless here] and product design, being well-versed in english, amateur skill in woodworking, being an amateur artist and being overall smarter than everyone around, since I wouldn't be illiterate and I have a modicum of knowledge in anthropology, philosophy, history [which would be meaningless in a different world, but would make for good fairytales] and sociology.

I'd probably look for an artisan, signmaker or carpenter willing to take me as a pupil [maybe a painter, with some luck]. I'd try to write some good books there or become a skillful artist/artisan/architect to get in good terms with the nobility.


About the magic stuff, what would define how good with magic you would be? Obviously not everyone in the world could be able to magick, but which set of skills would make someone better at magicking?
To be a good mage, would you need plain mathematical/logical thinking? Studying a completely different set of magical sciences that don't follow the logic of our world? Comprehending how matter works in order to better alter it? Maybe being disciplined and able to focus on minimal details would yield better results?
>>
>>20661711
OK screw the gambling, I'm getting me some bug girl love
>>
>Fantasy setting, wat do tuns into fantasy setting, who do
I fucking love you guys.
>>
>>20661741

They are pretty, elegant, and likely quite sensitive.
>>
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>>20661711
How well does that apply to humanoid races, though? For all we know, you can get thri-kreen half breeds, too because magic.
>>
>>20661742
I didn't say it 'cause she's brown. And as DAYUM goes, yo' elf so fat, she need clairvoyance to see her toes!
>>
>>20661779

Oh, well then...
>>
>>20661736

Humanity will be immortal when we kill the monsters for the vile beasts they are and humans breed with other humans only.
>>
>>20661783

After a point I think that the end result has more to do with the wizard you helped you than the particular biologies of either parent.
>>
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>>20661742
Also got DEM TITTIES to go with dem ears. I could rub them all night.
>>
>>20661801

Nope, I prefer being a race of immortals who happen to have interbreed with just about everything.
>>
>>20661783
dem bugs.....How does hivemind effect orgasm?
>>
>>20661806

Those tits are too big and gross.
>>
>>20661801
Or we will breed all of our threats awway into half-breeds.

Giant spider attacking the village? Fuck it and make some arachnes!

Basilisk eating your livestock? Fuck it and make some lamias!

The possibilities are endless.
>>20661805
Well, a wizard did boop you here, so maybe your dick became magic along the way.
>>
>>20661849

But that would kill off humanity.
>>
>>20661832

Okay, you can have that opinion. That's fine. That just means one less competitor for her heart and ears
>>
>>20661783
Humans can't breed with EVERYTHING. Even dwarves and humans can't interbreed very well.

>>20661831
>thri-kreen
>hive mind

Get out
>>
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>>20661806
I think I would just rub all of an elf, but I would totally focus on the ears.
>>20661791
You have no concept of beauty, then.
>>
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>>20661806
Rubbing oni ears is good too?
>>
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>>20661831
Maybe?
>>20661859
No, see, villagers still fuck other villagers, but adventurers are brave enough to go out in the world and fuck what NEEDS to be fucked, like lamias, elves, and dragons.
>>
>>20661860

Don't you have any brown elves with smaller bodies? I want to be closer to their heart.
>>
>>20661882
If it has long, rubbable ears, I WILL rub them. So yes.
I would also rub an onis horn, if only to make her all embarrassed and shit
>>
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>>20661893
I got a few, not that your ungrateful ass deserves them. Especially after such a corny line.
>>
I could probably bluff my way into becoming an adviser for the king or something. I'm fairly level headed so I think I could make a nice living doing that.

If that doesn't work I'd apprentice at a smithy, and once I get established I'd make myself a suit of armor and become a hedge knight or a sellsword. That way if my adventuring doesn't work out I'd have a home to come back to.
>>
Seeing how I have my wallet, phone, & keys that's about it. I'd be screwed. Only thing that would work in my favor is my height. Seeing how I can read, hopefully, that would put me ahead of 90% the population.

I'd find a way to return back home, but not before having sex with A.) Dwarf, B.) Elf, C.) Halfling, D.) Wizard. If I can't find a way back, I'll train to be a Druid or something. Turn into animals, fuck other animals and women as an animal.
>>
>>20661927

I'll have you know that corny lines work all the time.
>>
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>>20661932
>wizard
>having sex
>>
So, phone, watch, ipod, wallet... Boy am i boned.

Coins could be worth something, though i had better run if they discover they are cheap alloys.
>>
I know how to use a sword, so I offer to help the villagers with any monster problems in exchange for a blade.
>>
>>20661892
I don't have idea of what happens in this thread,
but I want more like that one.
>>
>>20661932
i wanna run with this anon
>>
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>>20661893
Wow. I haven't heard that one in a while.

You deserve this one, anon
>>
So I show up in the middle of Fantasyland with my mobile phone, my wallet and, hopefully, a messenger bag carrying a notebook and a few pens, pencils and rubbers. Great. I have no idea of what would I do to get by those first days.
I would try to find the local cleric/wizard and explain to him what the hell just happened to him. Let's hope my confused state, strange clothes and gadgets will convince him that I'm telling the truth and will make him take me as a guest until I can figure out shit on my own. Otherwise I would try to barter my pens and pencils for a room in the inn.
Next step would be to learn as much as possible about the world I'm in, current rulers, calendar, hazards, religion, other races that might exist and whether they are peaceful or not. I could probably spent weeks or even months reading everything.
After that? I don't know. I guess I'll have to find myself a home and I'll wonder if, perhaps, some of the strange races and cultures I've read about would welcome me and my strange stories of another world. I always liked the Underdark in Fantasy settings, perhaps that's where I should go after learning how to use a sword.
Yes, I think I could make a decent Bard.
>>
>>20661961
I know how to use my fists. can I join you in mercenary business?
>>
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>>20661893
So you're saying big titted elves don't deserve love? Fucking asshole.
>>
>>20662001

Do you also know how to kick?
>>
>>20662013

Everyone deserves love.

I just like smaller elves, is all.

>>20661983

I'll take it!
>>
>>20661481
You just reminded me of Dog Days.
It's a society where everyone is protected from death through the spirits of the land. They solve conflict by waging war, Takeshi's castle style.
>>
>>20662013
according to the elves of familiar of zero (where i'm hopefully zapped to live life as louise's familiar), elf tits don't get that big
>>
>>20662016
Sure. my legs are pretty short, but I made up with neat jumping power.
>>
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Realistically? Abuse my literacy and probably lead a relatively quiet life studying Magic and doing some printing work on the side.

If I'm not casting spells, healing the occasional sick, or printing up a copy of a spell book for a commission then I could see myself doing a spot of fishing and light traveling.

Maybe to some ruins outside of town, maybe visit a farmers market or two, then had back to my hovel or enclave depending on how successful I become.

I'd be happy just being a "background" character really.
>>
>>20662061

Good, you're our monk!
>>
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>>20662032
Did someone say Dog Days? Now I want a dog girl so I can rub her tummy...

Also, wasn't the protection limited to a few areas? I think they mentioned some places being dangerous because of that.
>>
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My plan, like most people's, is just to get enough money for some basic gear, then go wacky adventures for dosh and bitches.
>>
I'll attempt to re-create vinyl or at the very least wax cylinders and gramophones, and monopolise it. Just think how fantastical it would be.

Maybe work with a few artisans to figure out clockwork, or wizards to find a magical analogs to batteries.
>>
>>20662101

You could join our group. We'll get gear and go on a quest for dosh and rubbing elf ears.
>>
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>>20662122
Hell yeah I will!
>>
>>20662122
How much gear will we really need for such an endeavor? I mean, once I get me my long eared waifu, not much else matters.
>>
>>20662087
They also mentioned heroes not being defended.
Not like anyone in season 2 cares about that.
If S2 wasn't so ridiculously fun I'd be offended.
>>
>>20662138

A lot. Bitches love it when you go in a dungeon and conquer it. Gets them wet.

>>20662137

I think we need a healer.
>>
>>20662043
MOST stories with elves have them with petite stature.
That ASS-elf that was posted towards the beginning of this thread is a good example of Japanese bastardization of fluff.
That one is basically a human woman in proportion. Then again, she DOES look quite tempting...
>>
>>20662154
I'd imagine I could patch up lacerations or a fracture if we needed, but I'd rather be the one causing them, you know?
>>
>>20662154
Fuck healers, we need someone from /ck/
>>
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>>20662154
Well shit. Be warned, if we find some long earned lamia or medusa or other such monstergirl in the dungeon, I'm claiming that as my loot and I don't know how much help I will be once I get it.
>>
i know basic self defense, go everywhere in a bullet proof vest (sister is military and more than a bit obsessed with it, taught me to fight and will kick my ass if i don't regularly wear my vest), carry a leatherman everywhere (they're just fucking useful), and know some basic survival skills (again sister). i'm good with animals and know how to train a dog for home defense (this was because of my mom's drunk of an ex husband, not my sister)
i think i could count as a ranger, can i join the adventuring group to get pointy snake ears
>>
>>20662195

Are you the monk?
>>
Luckily, I have a great deal of military/survival information on my laptop, most which could easily be adapted to a pre-industrial world. I also have a solar battery-recharger and a small survival//medical kit in my backpack. Using my information, I sell my services to the local lord, helping him build up the infrastructure of his kingdom and strengthen the discipline of his soldiers. I do this in hopes of finding a way to return to my own world because I don't want to spend the rest of my life in some generic fantasy shit-hole.

Also, I've GMed this game before with GURPS: Banestorm. The players were on a cruise ship that got stuck in a banestorm and were transported to Yrth. Once they figured out the direness of their situation, they retreated to the low-mana zones of Yrth and set up a technocratic regime.
>>
>>20662201

You're in!
>>
>>20662195
THAT is mine.
>>
>>20662193
I can cook pretty well. It's just knowing what seasons go well with what.
I hope you enjoy roast chicken.
Also, I'm
>>20662101
>>
>>20662154

I'm going to be a wizard/alchemist working towards immortality, I think I could be the healer.
>>
>>20660866 What will you do to survive, what skills do you have which can be useful to either make a living or simply survive out in the world? What items do you have that might make a difference for you. Will you take up a profession, settle down, or travel the world?

I'm a Biochemist. I could be an Alchemist that distributes some totes legit meds, and be one King's Headache away from being a fucking noble or something.

I'd tour the world looking for 'ingredients.' If there's actually something new and interesting, then it wouldn't just be me wandering around like jackass on vacation.
>>
Okay, we got a good team rolling now. We'll decide who gets what bitch with dice rolls.
>>
>>20662201
>leatherman
What's that?

I only carry my keys, wallet (With ID, driver's license, Subway card, debit card, the prescription of my glasses and possibly some money), watch (LCD, batteries haven't been changed for about three or four years. It's supposed to run for two years), my mobile phone (Lumia 900) and a box of tissues.
Most of the time, there's also fucking comfortable Nike shoes and a jacket/coat/etc. of some kind.

I guess the soles of my shoes would lead to fascination, as would the explanation of how my watch works (a fucking small tuning fork + polarisation filters will be really fucking hard for them to not laugh at).
My mobile phone will be turned off on arrival and used a few dozen times to prove a point about my origin.
>>
>>20662211
No, I'm here.
>>20662226
I was also one of the creators of the crossboard thread responsible for the traslation of that doujin.
>>
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>Med student
>Become wondrous healer of everything
>Find myself a drider
>Live it up
>>
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>>20662211
Nope. I know my way around campsite, though.
>>20662226
Nah, dude, I already called dibs on long eared loot. If we find more than one, sure, but I got the first one.
>>
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>>20662154
I'd join, but I'm just a fighter.
>>
>>20662244

Screw that, I shall just go and seduce the fine elven women. Let them chose who shall rub their ears.
>>
This reminds me:
Was the story of the Polish time travellers preparing for the Mongolian invasion ever concluded?
>>
>>20662271

You couldn't seduce a whore even if you paid her the entire King's treasury.
>>
I am an ER nurse, so I would have skills to offer people whomever runs the kingdom where I land. On a normal day I carry my wallet and keys, so I bring nothing of value with me.

Hope for the best, probably get murdered or raped within 72 hours
>>
>>20662250
multitool, high quality
>>
>>20662250
Eeeza multipurpose tool. Nice to have out in the wilds.
>>
>>20662256
You'll call your dibs in hell pal.
that girl is mine for divine right!
>>
>>20662321

Maybe you guys should decide this like warriors?
>>
>>20662321
>You'll call your dibs in hell pal.
Well, succubi are pretty hot, too. And they have dem horns as well as dem ears...

TO HELL IT IS, LADS!
>>
>>20662284

Wizard/alchemist, I shall just boost my own charisma. Besides you underestimate your competition.

>>20662345

And while you do that I shall be off seducing the ladies.
>>
>>20662345
Dear god...keep your honor in your pants!

Your other honor too.
>>
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>>20662355
FUCK YEAH!
>>
>>20662291
Just stick a cat or dead rabbit under your nose and pretend you're a guy.
apart that, I bet that with a little equipment you can make a fair amount of money- or goods, if people will start making gift
>>
the party has fallen, it's every manwhore for himself
>>
I would study to become a paladin or something like that, nothing better than being able to heal and protect at the same time, and I would fit perfectly since I'm very tall.

I would probably find the elf kingdom and go on adventures.
>>
If we're calling dibs, I call dibs on all the petite elves.
>>
So, how many people appear in fantasy land. Everyone in this thread, or /tg/?

If everyone appears in the same area we'd have a fairly reasonable group of people to establish ourselves as a mercenary company, or guild of artisans and adventures
>>
>>20662355
succubi are demons, in hell you'd find erinyes (which i prefer, fluffy wings over bat wings)
also, dibs on albino lamia
>>
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>>20662373
NO!

HONOR PREVAILS!

WE SHALL COLLECT ALL THE POINTY EARNED BITCHES ACROSS ALL THE REALMS AND EVERYONE GETS ONE OF EACH!
>>
>>20662376
Everyone's calling dibs on the petite elves.

The only way to ensure that we get them, however, is to do something heroic for their village, and then let the bitches come to us.
>>
I formed this party, and I will not let you assholes ruin it because you want some ears to rub!

We're going to the nearest elf/lamia village and spending all our money on whores just so we can gain some brotherly bonds!
>>
>>20662397
Or we'd break apart bickering over which creature we should fuck first.
>>
>>20662397
where do I find the paperwork for a gambler's guild?
>>
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>>20662397
Whatever works. If nothing else, I could always just say screw it, settle down with a nice girl, and be a farmer.
>>
>>20662419

Deal, captain.
>>
>>20662419
once again, ale and whores solve our problems
seriously, why wasn't this thought of first
>>
>>20662397
It would be a very bizzare form of HFY.

Imagine the kind of group we could create. Collect more and more equipment, use the knowledge on our devices (We have a few guys with chargers) and become capable of taking down wizards without having magic ourselves.
And then we enchant our custom-made guns for a few bucks...
>>
>>20662419
Wait, lamias and elves come in VILLAGES?! TOGETHER?! Why the fuck are we out adventuring again?!
>>
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My wife is a scientist, and we discussed it and she promised not to leave me if we got zapped into a fantasy world, as she has the knowledge to succeed and thrive.
>>
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>>20662437
and then adopt a little elven orphan girl and play with her ears, in a totally non-sexual way, of course...

Don't judge me.
>>
>>20662461

I think it was an either elf or lamia thing. Plus we adventure for loot so we might obtain bitches and brandy.
>>
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>>20662419
Fine by me, I was up for whatever.
>>
>>20662461

Because we need money.

>>20662480

If we find a village with both, we'll set up base there.
>>
So /tg/ forms a small nomadic mercenary state and sets out to conquer all the bitches and troll everyone endlessly?
I can live with that. It will be bro-tastic.

We should come back to former targets from time to time to collect any children we may have conceived, if they are old enough to travel.
>>
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>>20662375
Forgot pic

I would actually want to use a dagger since I like them but how would I be able to pass as rogue or assassin being 6,1 feet tall? At least I would be able to defend people I like/love and I don't want nothing more than that
>>
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>>20662480
>>20662484
Why don't we FOUND Waifu Village and set up our Adventuring Guild there? That way, we have a consistent homefront to store both our extra waifus and our extra loot
>>
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>>20662478
pic
>>20662461
not sure if together, but there are definately villages
>>
>>20662501

Do you realize the number of people we would need and the gold required to set up our own village?

Leave it to me, the Captain. We'll fuck bitches, rub ears, get money, earn loyalty, and we'll set up more than a village. We'll set up a Kingdom! The Kingdom of Waifu!
>>
>>20662397
No, no...organization will kill the sense of adventure! away, you half-bureaucrat!
>>
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i'd either get rich or die tryin
>>
>>20662516
And thus, the Harem Knights of Kingdom Waifusia conquered ALL the bitches.
>>
>>20662516
We know. We know much.
It would be easy to kickstart a village. I want us to conquer bitches with SCIENCE!.
>>
>>20662501

Yes, with a fine wizard tower(technically an underground research laboratory, the tower is just to look pretty and have a nice view). And then make other such cities with teleportation between them.
>>
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>>20662501
Because founding a village takes time and money, and we are merely adventurers with a penchant for hilariously crazy tactics.

However, if we're really good, many elf/lamia/etc maidens shall flock to the current resident village of the mighty foreign adventurers who hail from the bizzare land of Teejee, all of whom seek a potential bride.
>>
>>20662541
>>20662546

It'll happen, but we need to focus on the now. The now consists of finding a village filled with elves and lamias and fucking them. Fucking them long and fucking them hard.
>>
>>20662546
>using kickstarter to start a transdimensional waifu village/kingdom
>supporters get their very own waifu depending on how much they pledge
This is the best use of Kickstarter I have ever heard of.
>>
>>20662564
>>20662555
>>20662572
Well of course we need to focus on the now first, I was just giving us a long term goal to work towards.
>>
>>20662580
someone start it
someone start it right now
>>
Some people could make a drug lab. Breaking bad, medieval style.
>>
I have a craft knife and two short knives for work (an 8" and a 12"). I have three pens, a notepad, my wallet with coin, plastic note and plastic cards/paper cards/business cards, my phone, my keys a work vest, a work shirts, black pants, steel-capped boots, boxers, a pair of feet shaped earrings and if I'm on my way to work a backpack with a PSP, charger, street shirt, bobby pins, hair ties, and the usual detritus that accompanies a backpack that exists for multipurpose use.

I'm pretty sure, that as long as I don't get killed for arriving and looking different that if I head to a metallurgist/smith or a place of learning and give over all my stuff I will be able to live nicely on paid property giving out what shit I know.

If I land in a place where people are open and innovative the stuff I have on me, and the knowledge I have will enrich them in ways that will accelerate their technological and sociological progress: for good or ill.

Hopefully though they have magic/diving power because the first thing that will need to happen is that I have cure disease, etc cast on me so I don't plague father the entire world.

While I can't myself cause too much acceleration on my own, the fibers, metals and PLASTICS I carry can be reverse engineered, as long as people are open, innovative and careful with the limited resources I have on me.
>>
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>>20662516
Will we be able to find a place that makes awesome rugs?

>>20662524
It's a dirty job, but someone would have to do it, even if we stayed as a small group.
>>
>>20662572
No, get your priorities straight.
First we need to SURVIVE.
How do we manage to not get tortured and killed by the local guards once we arrive out of bumfuck nowhere, looking really fucking weird and out of shape?
I guess they'll think the fattest among us are nobility.
>>
>>20662592

We'll get that Kingdom and harem. Don't worry.
>>
>>20662603

We'll use our diplomacy skills from our long days of gaming.
>>
>>20662603

Well before we can go whoring we have to go adventuring to obtain the loot, to pay for everything.
>>
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>>20662600
Our waifus will deal with both the paperwork and the rugwork.
Think of it! Elves and arachnes, working together to make the fanciest of rugs, harpies running letters to and fro for the bureaucracy savvy succubi deal with all the fine print.

It will be glorious.
>>
I'd travel to a major academic hub, declare my literacy and try to impress with interesting knowledge.

I would then construct crude proof of concept electrical batteries, generators and a few basic components and circuits from my head. I could also build devices that used electricity (filament bulbs, LEDs being the initially most impressive) if provided the materials.

I also know how to manufacture black powder from materials I can collect or request myself, and a few other incendiarys/explosives. I also have a side interest in gunsmithing and weaponry of all ages, and given enough time and trial and error I could theoretically build flintlock or cartridge rifles, as well as offer armchair general advice on how to use these in battle - if industry permits me to get that far.

I could offer blueprints for numerous engines and machines, a fair few industrial processes, and with luck build a working steam engine if given a workshop and some craftsmen.

A could offer a fair bit of medical techniques and procedures, a few antibiotics with there sources, surgical advice, aftercare advice, idea of sterility and identifying and treating some common diseases. Write theories on biology, microbiology, genetics and mention the idea of vaccines.

If I unload all of my applyable knowledge and faced with old age, I'll sit back in the university writing extensive thoughts and theories on potential future scientific, military and industrial breakthroughs, which will amazingly be proved accurate in later centuries and serve as guides for future scientists to look into.

Although its likely i'll be branded a heretic and an immoral evildoer. Then die to dysentery.
>>
>>20662603
If it's a magical realm, they'll believe us if we say "a wizard did it".
After that, we use our modern knowledge and practical skills to earn some gold, but some weapons and armor, then form into groups of adventurers.
>>
I've got a bushknife, an eating knife, biker jacket, armoured biker jeans, contact lenses, zippo, and all other usual clothes.

And i'm a fully qualified blacksmith. I think i'll do just fine providing I don't lose my damn glasses -.-
>>
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>>20662653
>"a wizard did it"
I think they'll set out a witch hunt to find the responsible guy. Especially once we start burning down villages and raping lamias.
>>
>>20662653
>modern knowledge
what if it doesn't work? What if physics work differently there?
>>
>>20662662
>-.-
We don't take lightly to your kind. Fuck off and let us have our civil discussion.
>>
>>20662671

Woah woah, who said we're raping and burning villages?

We're living in villages and seducing! "Seducing". Get it right!
>>
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>>
>>20662674
Then we break magic and ENFORCE our physics.
>>
>>20662679
That doesn't mean we won't bumblefuck our way into accidentally burning a few houses early on, especially if the screencaps I've read are true.
>>
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>>20662635
All true enough, but we also need the dog girls. Loyalty is not to be underestimated.

Maybe I can put one of them in charge of an item store for me while I'm gone...
>>
>>20662674
Doesn't matter, ponos still goes in vagoo. Thats all that matters.
>>20662671
>rape
Now, now, we are all perfect gentleman. Besides, it would be hard to rape something that can crush your bones with a hug.
>>
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>>
Wait wait, we're going to get bored while on the road. We need some songs to sing as we're traveling.
>>
>>20662706
All kinds of monster girls shall live there.

All kinds.
>>
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>>20662706
Well of course. We will take some waifus with us for adventuring, after all.
>>
>>20662729

And we will fuck them all.
>>
>>20662725
If one of us knows guitar, this would be great for by the campfire.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KRRGYEFZF4A
>>
>>20662725
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6j8jMn2Kcgs
>>
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>>20662750
>>
>>20662725
We will listen to this song nonstop and change its name to Earward Bound
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tARfKHBSAfA
>>
Due to these threads and screwing around on /k/ I have a folder on my laptop full of vertical info-pics a la "If you go into the past/other world/whatnot"

>most of basic human science covered
>how to make most basic chemicals covered (gunpowder, soap, alcohol, a few other fun things like rubber and plastic)
>how-to guide for metallurgy and smelting
>survivalist medical guide
>how to make guns and bullets
>high-rez detailed maps of most of earth
>astrological star charts and whatnot (can be real handy to figure out when in time you are... if you can figure that shit out, I can't)


Anything else I should add?
>>
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4nyHPIcbn88

there is no better song for us
>>
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>>20662736
Ah, good point.

Yes...an item shop might do great. Feeding that many people might get tough if the adventuring hits a dry spell.
>>
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>>20662817
Remember, we are going to have a full kingdom, full of farmers, blacksmiths, politicians, etc, all of them our waifus and all of them funded by the loot we get on our CUHRAZY adventures.
>>
Just to be safe, we should find some after the elf and lamia fucking. We'll need milk, after all.
>>
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I will join yon party, if thou needs an Archer.
>>
>>20662849

Some cowgirls.
>>
>>20662803
upload it
>>
>>20662803
Could you please share some of that goodness with us proud neckbeards who never venture outside this board?
>>
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>>20662840
But we need to fund ourselves via CURAAAAZY adventuring before we found a proper kingdom. We'll have to do with simply seducing women as we go along, at least at first.
>>
>>20662808
>MY life is ruined by this song
>Become a wandering murderhobo as penance
>>
>>20662860
And the eggs and bacon?
>>
http:images/1347226465322.png
>>
>>20662891

Chickengirls and piggirls?
>>
>>20662904
>Chickengirls
Seems like someone needs to play the cock.

>piggirls
Thank fuck we aren't on /a/.
>>
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>>20662840
True enough, but I was talking about mine in particular. Wouldn't want to be a burden to the rest of the community, and the extra funds could help balance out any failed scientific endeavors the other people are trying.

>>20662868
>>20662864
I think I know which one he's talking about.

Most of it seems so obvious to us, but most of it would be revolutionary back before the 1600's.
>>
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>>20662891
We'll subsist on only beverages and the burning desire to claim a waifu!

We'll be real men, anon!
>>
>>20662904

Harpies provide eggs. We don't need no bacon.
>>
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>>20662840
>Sire, those outrealmers, the one the wizard brought here...
>What of them, General?
>They...they seem to be raising a horde of some sort of the surrounding monsters.
>What?!
>Yes, milord, they have already formed a small village and have what they call an “Adventurer’s Guild” based out of it.
>Are they planning to attack us?! Rally the guard immediately!
>Thats just the thing, milord! They haven't done anything! They merely go out in the wilds, return with gold and more monsters, and expand their borders. So far, it has all been legal, as dictated by the Writ of Ownership a succubi they have recruited has drawn up with the local lords. In fact, the revenue their exploits have brought to the area have endeared the local populace. They even have a small elf tribe that has moved into their village! Attacking them would prove disastrous, milord...
>May the gods preserve us all...
>>
>>20662929

And we'll claim the human women of the other villages because we're that good.
>>
>>20661948

>WIZARDs
>Not starting the "Fuck everything that moves" trend.

The only thing hornier than a high level wizard with nothing to do is a Lamia Bard.[/spoiler'
>>
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>>20662875
Exactly. Heres how its gonna go
>Form a party
>Go adveturan
>Bring back gold/first waifus to local lordship and get dosh
>Build fortress guildhouse out in the woods and let the first non-combat waifus set up shop in there
>Go adventuran again to get more dosh and waifus
>Use dosh and waifus to expand fortress into a village
>the fame of our exploits will eventually earn us even more waifus that show up while we are out adventuring for waifus
>Rinse, repeat until kingdom of waifus
>>
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>>20662904
How about just actual chickens and pigs? Things that the Cowgirls can see to and raise properly.

Oh, and if you need a good diplomat and duelist, I have capability in both. You're going to need SOMEONE to honey the ears of the male elves and monster-people, not to mention someone with enough forward thinking to be able to properly indoctrinate the half-breed offspring both male and female that will inevitably show up.

Even Captcha agrees: induct groupies
>>
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>>20662950

Not only is this plan smart, honorable and ingenious, it also involves a lot of Waifus.

10/10 would use as a plan, every time.
>>
>>20662982

We are the best adventuring group ever.

We're not out to save the world or earn the favor of the King. We just want a lot of waifus.
>>
>>20660972
I'm probably one of the only blacksmiths on this board.

But even as a novice, my knowledge of metallurgy for outstrips most knowledge of it in any fantasy setting.

Also, you can use iron for cannon barrels, it's just a bastard to cast in that shape.
>>
archive?
>>
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All right then gents, seems you have your roles figured out. Guess I'll just hang back in the village, manage the militia/town guard, and make sure the stores and pub are still in good order when everyone else gets back.
>>
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I see that there is no man yet proficient in ranged combat in this party, I am here to solve that.
>>
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>>20663011
It'll also give me time to figure out how to get my half-dragon waifu
>>
>>20662990
/tg/ - we just keep it simple
>>
>>20663002

Hail brother, I too am a novice blacksmith. I've been practicing since 2006, and while I am by no means a master at any part, I have made my fair share of items.
>>
>>20663029

If I find one, I'll send her back to you.
>>
>>20663029
Well, a few furfags might get ported with us and it wont be too long until half-drags show up that way. Or we could go find a dragon and convince her to move her hoard to our fortress and hope she doesnt mind using polymorph. Then we have a dragon banker to work with our succubi bureaucrats.
>>
>>20663078

What's to stop all these ladies from uprising and making all men their slaves?
>>
>>20663044
I'll keep the homefront safe then.

Come to think of it, I do know how to brew moonshine. The concepts for that and beers are supposed to be similar, so I could do a bit of brewing on the side too.

>>20663078
This place just keeps getting better and better.
>>
>>20663084
Simple we make a religion!
>>
>>20663084
love
>>
>>20663084
Crap, we didn't think that trough.

Oh well, we'll make something up as we go.
>>
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>>20662982
Its all about whats best in life, and that would be waifus.
>>20663084
Because they're our waifus. We treat them well and in return they live with us in harems. We arent trying to enslave them and thus they have no reason to enslave us, especially since we bring them back dosh and more waifus to chat with while we are out gathering more waifus. Our kingdom is one of love, you see. Love and waifus. So many waifus.

Now we just need a guild emblem that will one day be our national flag.
>>
>>20663134
Well, what would represent /tg/ the most?
A book, pencil, and dice?
>>
>>20663029
Come now chum, never ask yourself how, simply ask yourself when. We'll sort out the other details for you. My only question is what god will give us their blessing with all this "business" going on?
>>
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>>20663100
No, I'm not pulling duty as preacher too.

>>20663102
That works. Just remember everyone, don't take them for granted.

Also, dog girls.
>>
>>20663146
>>20663134
Whatever it is, it must include pointy ears. After all, we founded this land on the pursuit of pointy ears to rub, and we must forever honor those humble beginnings.
>>
>>20663170
We make our own god. The god of waifus.
>>
>>20663176
The flag itself should be pointy!
>>
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>>20663134

Something that symbolizes sexy time without being NSFW.

Kind of like this.
>>
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>>20663188
So our flags and helmets will both have pointy ears on them? I like it!
>>
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>>20663188
Swallow-tailed pointy or really pointy truck pointy?
>>
I'll have a sketch pad and some pencils, I guess I could sketch people for money. Oh can I buy magic lessons? Do I need to be smart because I'm an idiot.
>>
>>20663236
Shallow-tailed would fit a flag the most, don't you think.
>>
>>20663248

You can sketch our waifus.
>>
>>20663248
No, but you can start drafagging emblems for our guild.
>>20663236
Swallowtail works for me.
>>
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>>20663276
Perhaps. We could always have both(truck is the term for the ball on top of a flag pole).
>>
>>20663307
10/10
Would follow into battle
>>
>>20662803
so is this guy gonna upload pics or not?
>>
>>20663307
So all of our flags would be topped with balls with elf ears on them?

And I think we should take a page from Bretonnia and place a small statue of our first waifu on top of our helm as a rite of passage for the Harem Knights.
>>
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-6FXeupOp04

You guys seriously haven't linked this for campfire songs?
>>
>>20663307
so fuckin' rad
>>
>>20663385
This too
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q2evIg-aYw8
>>
You know, this would make a hilarious Civ Setting. Trying to expand our borders and our waifus without getting caught up in wars with the other guilds, towns, and eventually kingdoms. Having to fight a dragon and then coerce her to join us, having to keep conditions on the homefront comfy so waifus don't defect whilst also funding our expansion.
>>
>>20663435

It would be the best game.
>>
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>>20663384
Now we're talkin.

Also, I think I found our diety.
>>
I have enough trouble getting a human girl, let alone a non-human.

I think i'll stick with my own species. Unless elf girls are easy.
>>
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since i know some of you want the baker's daughter
>>
Are husbandos allowed or will we have to make a seperate village for that?
>>
>>20663455

Elf girls love a hero/adventurer. Join the Harem Knights of Teegee
>>
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>>20663435

I will gladly volunteer to manage the home front waifus, I will sacrifice my adventuring to appease our many, MANY, waifus.
>>
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>>20663455
elf women like human men like white women like black men
>>
>>20663455
>not joining with the most glorious brotherhood known to man and getting all the bitches
Ya dun goofed, son. Every girl loves an adventurer and you'll be spending the day with the broest of bros and spending the night with your loving harem of your choice.
>>
>>20663465
I guess we can have room for one...
>>
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>>20663486
You only get to “manage” your own waifus. Handling another man’s harem would be the dickest of moves and go against everything we stand for.
>>20663465
Well, I imagine the first village will be too full of waifus, but once we branch out, I see no reason to not diversify our land to accommodate those with varied interests.
>>
>>20663502
What if you prefer to have a pure waifu, rather than a shared fuckslut?
>>
>>20663534

We don't share our waifus. Your waifu is yours alone.
>>
>>20663531

You slight me sir! I may be volunteering to stay home and protect our Waifus, I know the rules, and I dare say I am taken aback with your accusations!
>>
>>20663534
You can have only one waifu if you want, but your waifu belongs to you and you alone. No one is going to be sharing your waifu with you except your other waifus.
>>
>>20663560
Just making sure we are all clear on the rules. After all, >>20663534 was a little confused on the rules, too.
>>
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>>20663534
Why would you share a waifu? Look, early on, we're not going to be adventuring lords, we'll be mere adventurers. It is then that you meet your first waifu, and if you choose so, that can be your only one, that's cool.

But we're bros, and bros don't fuck with another bro's waifu. That's a real dick move.
>>
Know this: All who take the pact of the Harem Knight acknowledges that they are under a bro-tract. It's like a contract, but more bro. Breaking the bro-tract leads to be the ultimate anti-bro, and you don't want that.

So yeah, don't fuck your bro's waifu.
>>
>>20663560
Gentleman, gentleman, let's not bicker like this. A man's harem is sacred.
>>
>>20663581
>bros don't fuck with another bro's waifu.
unless all bros and waifus involved are into that (i'm not but i'm probably into lots of stuff other people aren't)
>>
>>20663465
All love is welcome! What kind of husbandos did you have in mind?
>>
OP here. I let the thread run a while back, what the shit happened?
>>
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>>20663572

All I am saying is that once we amass enough Waifus that it becomes a hinderance to our travelling and adventuring, I will escort and protect them back to found our new homes. I will not govern them unless told to, I will not accost any other Waifu besides my own. I just want to make sure our Waifus are safe and comfortable while the main party is out gaining and massing loot to fund our new home.

I am a man of one waifu, so fear not other Knights. Just one... pointy eared... Waifu...
>>
>>20663696

We formed the ultimate Knighthood.
>>
>Kingdom founded on love in the middle of dense forest.

So, non-hippie Elves?
>>
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>>20663696
>>20663718
/tg/ happened.
>>
>>20663728
>City-state founded on peace, love, and doing the nasty.
>Not hippy.
Come on, all we're missing is the
hallucinogenics.
>practised HeadyT
I'm not sure if this should be taken as a blessing or an insult on my waifu's part.
>>
>>20663146
As for a flag, i was thinking a draconic aquila surronded by the 5 colors of mana and the four leaf symbol would work well, and each harem could have its own personal heraldry
>>
>>20663040

More sons of metal?
What a joyous day.

I specialize in casting and tool making.

Any specializations yourself?
>>
>>20663828

I am a tool maker myself, but posses no way of making molds as of yet, so I have no tried casting. I specialize in broad headed tools specifically. Axes, tongs, chisels, trowels, etc.

I have tried my hand at making blades, but they have always turned out less than stellar. Conversely, I've made a lot of chain linking for mail, and am currently in the process of starting a cuirass.
>>
>>20663750

Picture needs a few elves and lamias at his feet.
>>
this thread must be archived
>>
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>>20663534
To be perfectly clear, this man brings up a problematic and valid point: What if, at any time, two bros have an equal claim on a single waifu? If there is no sharing, who will have claim on this waifu? If this system isn't carefully thought out, there will be classes where waifus are currency. The rich get large harems while the poor are left single waifus left over from the upper-classes' picks.

The simplest way I can see is to simply let the waifus choose, but therein creates a problem where the most charismatic/wealthy bros accrue the most waifus regardless of whether they are deserved, turning it into something of a capitalism of love'n. A more restricted system of doling out waifus on an equal basis will create problems found in arranged marriages where the waifus are not happy because their lives are essentially treated as property. Thus, there must be some system in the middle which restricts the acquisition of waifus while still providing the waifus appropriate liberty to who they give love'n to and to minimize undesired NTR.
>>
I entered the Kingdom of Teegee as an envoy, a diplomat for the neighboring Nation of Drasavia. I was afforded a fair view of their kingdom from the carriage they had summoned for me, driven by a cheery young man and his lupine companion. I must admit, the sights I saw were a touch disturbing to say the least. Humans and elves working alongside minotaurfolk and even orcs out in the fields. It simply went against everything I had ever known. These outrealmers surely had a strange view of the world. Another oddity I noticed was that the further inland we traveled, the more sparse both the houses and the number of males in the villages became. Large manors replaced hamlets and the only thing I could see were women of all types and sizes. Elf, human, lamia, harpy, and even a dragon or two (despite assuming a human form, the dragons still kept their tails, wings, horns and the like for reasons I can only guess at) all lived side by side. My guide explained to me that these were the homes of the famed Harem Knights, and that most of them were out adventuring across the lands to find more treasure, more adventure, and more women. Some had even journeyed to other realms to claim demons and angels as their own! Finally, we had come to the heartland of Teegee, the prestigious Castle Waifusia, which had once been a simple guildhall in what seemed like a lifetime ago. How quickly these outrealmers worked! Finally, I met one of the Harem Knights as he welcomed me into the castle. He was a broad man with the body of an experienced traveler, but what drew my attention was the helm with a statue of a lamia upon it and the small snake child wrapped contentedly around his arm. He beamed at me and beckoned for me to join him within the castle. I was not prepared for the sight within that awaited me.
>>
>>20663893
isn't this why the US has both the senate (equal number of votes per state) and the house of representatives (number of votes based on population)
>>
>>20663916

Who allowed envoys to our kingdom? Was it the Captain?
>>
>>20663949

As the homeguard sharpshooter, it is safe it was not me.
>>
>>20663949
I'm sorry, I took it upon myself to invite at least one of our neighbours, the merchants and pilgrims were becoming ever suspicious on how our kingdom worked, and rumor of dark activities were growing.

It's a cultural exchange, that's all.
>>
>>20663986

We should prepare the men for a possible invasion. Kingdom doesn't trust us for being outrealmers, and they won't trust us because of our love for all these ladies.

>>20664023

Well, if they decide to attack, at least we know who to blame.
>>
>>20664030

I will muster the home guard and the battle waifus if their Knights give permission. No outsiders will escape my sights.
>>
>>20664030
Have faith, good knight, while I may be simply a bookish cleric, I know that they'd have certainly invaded if they didn't know our goings-on. It's better for snide remarks to be muttered then blood shed after all.
>>
>>20663861
Blade smithing is a very tough art.

I've had a few poor attempts at it as well.

Casting is simple, it's more learning to work with the sand, or lost wax/foam.

I despise chainmaille, and just to make sure no one ever tries to buy any from me, i state that it will be forged chain maille and therefore horrendously expensive.

Being a caster, i can make tongs of all shapes and sizes at a very quick pace, which is nice when you need something knew.

Though my furnace does take a beating..
>>
>>20664070

Well, keep an eye on him. See what he reports about our kingdom.

>>20664052

Thank you.
>>
>>20663916
Their mighty castle was in actuality a massive feasthall full of revelry and splendor. Something they called “wargaming” dominated the less rambunctious quarters, with a certain “Forty Kay” being a topic of much debate and dissent. The knight that had greeted introduced himself as one Sir Henderson whereas his daughter chipped in that she was Illiana Scaletail, though she seemed too shy to say much more and was content to simply watch the proceedings from her vantage point.

After we passed through the main hall filled with many cooks of once again various make (one of the lamias of which my new escort stopped to chat before continuing on), we passed by what I presumed to be the heart of their legal proceedings. This room was filled with rows upon rows of desks, all inhabited with succubi in suits and ties writing letters and passing them off to harpies, who then took flight with them out the large window that dominated one of the walls. We did not stop here, however. Instead he took me to one of the castle’s innermost sanctums.

Compared to the din of the feasthall or the bustle of the legal room, this one was deathly silent. There were a few other Harem Knights in here as well, with their seemingly everpresent female attendants. It was here he bid me to speak freely of my purpose in visiting their fair kingdom. Needless to say, it took me a moment to find my bearings and continue on with my mission.
>>20663949
>>20664023
>>20664030
>>20664052
>>20664052
>>20664070
Gimme a sec guys, the story isnt done
>>
Hey Harem Knights, who has the cutest waifu?
>>
>>20664074

I made a proper forge setup last summer. Full brick furnace and a 75 pound anvil. I have my tool rack and apron hook, as well as a small work bench if I need to do leather working or just a larger work surface.

Working with mail is not a big issue with me as I spiral coil all my steel, and just cut off rivet by rivet, and just forge-weld the links shut. A couple second on a hot plate and two quick taps is enough to seal each link. I get a pretty good rhythm going quickly, so I don't mind the work if the client is willing to pay the price.

NOT being a caster, I have to hand shape everything still, which can be a nuisance, especially in creating bars to work with later. Though, my picking up new extra long hot punches made punching handle sockets for axes or trowels much, MUCH easier.
>>
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>Suddenly wizard
Kill him
Magic is an abomination
>>
>>20664186
and thus, our civil war began
>>
>>20664204
says the wizard
>>
>>20664195
My forge keeps getting disassembled each time i have to move. And i always have to break apart my furnace as well. Right now all i really have with me is the knowledge and experience to make these things again, and of course my hammer.

Could never leave my hammer.

i would kill for a permanent forge setup, so i could really get into making the tools that i really need.

The only problem i've encountered with iron tools is that they can be a bit hard to work with in steel heat fires.

just a thought.
>>
>>20664186
Don't start that shit man...
>>
>>20664089
I told him that their kingdoms most recent expansion into the Spiderfall Barrows had left our king nervous, seeing as that region had always been a thorn in our side and a weakness in our perimeter. He merely laughed and said that some of their knights had desired some arachnes, so they had pressed into the area. I had to refuse him on his offer of regaling me with the tale, but the end result is that Queen Visaria herself had decided to join their kingdom and some of her daughters had already begun filtering their way through the kingdom. I was flabbergasted. The Spider Queen and her pet Twitcher had been a thorn in our side for years, and these outrealmers not only bested her, but had convinced her to join with humans! I had to know how they did, so I asked him. I asked him about it all. The monsters, how they kept so many in their thrall despite their numbers, how they expanded so fast, of how they could get the angel and demon in the corner of the room to not only not tear each other to bits, but to chat amiably over a cup of tea! I didn't expect him to tell me their secret, but I couldn't stop myself from seeking the answer. But he and the others only laughed heartily. When they were done he told me. He told me all of it.

He told me of the concept of Waifu, of how they do not go out to foreign lands to conquer them, but instead to romance their women. He told me that all the women around us are not here because they are forced to be, but because they wanted to be. The Harem Knights doted over their women, their “waifus”, they bring them gifts and take the more fiery spirited of them out questing with them and in return they live in their vast manors with them.
>>
>>20664271

I am just curious who has the cutest waifu! I seek knowledge is all!
>>
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>>20664224
The ends justifies the means no?
>>
>>20664186
>Implying that we haven't made a counter-measure incase someone contemplates this.
Why do you think we've mentioned religion? We praise the mother Waifu. The goddess from which we all descend, each of us carrying a small, but equal, portion of her beauty.
>>
>>20664299

I Don't like this one. He seems shifty.
>>
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Guys, what about ifrit waifu's?
They can light our fires, give us warm food to fill our bellies, keep us warm at night
>>
>>20664347

Harem Knights, what say you? Shall we conquer some more women?
>>
>>20664329

Shifty? I just want to know about the cutest waifu.
>>
>>20664369
can we test out the new belt-fed shotguns on the way?
>>
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>>20664186
>>20664299
It depends on who you ask. Well, no, that's certainly not the case, for ask any of the Harem Knights of TeeGee and the answer will be the same. Who has the cutest waifu?

"My Waifu"

And thus, every man who opens his lips speaks the truth, for it resides in each and every one of their burning hearts.
>>
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>>20664441
Opinions
>>
>>20664441
I though we already established that it was the cuteness elementals?
>>
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>>20664292
I was floored. The might Visaria was not conquered with by blade, but with a date! Sir Henderson informed that even now the knight in question who wooed her was in her lair, sprucing up the place along with his other waifus and helping her forge truces with the nations she had antagonized for so long.

He explained how everyone in this land had united under the concept of Waifu, of how you could have one or many (one of their founding knights, Sir Gavran Earstroker, had taken for himself a dark skinned elf and nothing more!). He told me that everyone could have a waifu, that everyone DESERVED a waifu, and that no one should be judged for their waifu. Still digesting this information, I bid Sir Henderson farewell and returned home, passing a man flanked by two fire elementals on either side of him and suddenly understanding why they imported so many scrolls of fire protection from the Wizard's Guild every year.

So this ends my report on the Kingdom of Teegee. Their military is vast, but that is not where their true strength lies. No, their power lies in that of the Waifu, a concept that can convert even the coldest of souls. Even now I contemplate if they are so wrong, if, despite their perversions and deviance, they have the right idea. I foresee a day where the Kingdom of Teegee will take over all the realm and beyond with the strength of their Harem Knights and the power of Waifu, but I cannot for the life find a reason to fear this day. Is it really so bad, to want a waifu of your very own?

----Last report of Evarion Windfellow, Former Envoy of Drasavia, current whereabouts unknown
>>
>>20664474
There's an elemental plane of cuteness? What the fuck is cute even an element?
>>
>>20664459

Well, this didn't go as planned.
>>
>>20664523
Yes
It's kinda like the element of surprise, except with cute
>>
>>20664550

It does not matter how cute this plane of cuteness is, my waifu is the cutest.
>>
rolled 17 = 17

>>20664526
Perception check!
>>
>>20664586

For what? I'm just a citizen of Teegee. Normal ol' citizen.
>>
>>20664523
I know right? it was hilarious when we accidentally opened a portal to it though (despite the fact that we still find cat hair in that room from time to time)
>>
>>20664526
>>20664586
Aha I knew it your a spy!
>>
>>20664586
No no no, roll for a sense motive
>>
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>>20664570
Dude. Dude. This is a homely girl on that plane.
>>
>>20664608
You're*
>>
>>20664570
But don't you see? Every waifu is a cuteness elemental! For they are all imbued with a smidgeon of the elemental plane of cuteness, just enough to resonate with the heart of their true companion. That is why it is up to the Harem Knights to seek out and collect waifus that call out to them and for our kawaiiomancers to help all waifus realize that they are cute to someone.
>>
>>20664526
>>20664441
>>20664299
>>20664186
HEY, THAT GUY'S NOT A GUY, HE'S JUST A BEAR!
>>
>>20664619

My waifu is the cutest.
>>
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>>20664594
I highly doubt that, considering you asked one of the first questions answered to the children in their daycare. Your attempt to sow unrest in our ranks is foolish at best, you think such a realm could survive without a mutual understanding?
>>
>>20664627
Bears are my waifu.
>>
>>20664682

Is it a crime to ask questions? I'm a criminal now? Is that it? For seeking knowledge?
>>
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>>20664705
Certainly not, I'm just finding your flailing about amusing is all. But pray tell, should we count you a criminal?
>>
>>20664705
That may not be a crime, but stabbing sir conhager in the back and destroying his mechanical sentry contraption is
>>
>>20664705
Gaurds! Convert him. He must see the truth .
>>
rolled 10 = 10

>>20664749

Well, that's the cue for getting the FUCK out of here.

You outrealmers are making some enemies with your monster fucking ways. Don't be surprised when my King comes and kills these vile beasts.

Now, to escape!
>>
rolled 11 = 11

>>20664705
>Rollan' sense motive
You're asking questions that fall under categories such as philosophy, you can understand why we might get a bit riled up at the fact that we simply don't have answers that are "true" as the answer will change for each man.

Perhaps some time reflecting upon the question itself rather than asking it blindly and constantly will garner better answers. You're welcome to join us on our next expedition, perhaps you'll find a Waifu for yourself and see our point of view.
>>
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>>20664774
Oh no you fucking don't.
>>
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>>20664741

He must tighten our security of the homeland. We must not embargo ourselves, but we must become more wary.
>>
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>>20664705
You see, outlander, there is no such thing as the cutest waifu, for they are all the cutest.

Some men want nothing more than to touch fluffy tail. For him, the kitsune or the wolfgirl might be the cutest waifu.

Some men love the feeling of closeness that can only come from a scaly coils of a full bodied snakehug. For him, the lamia and her kin would be the cutest waifu.

And even other men desire nothing but a gentle breeze in their treetop hammock as they gently stroke the elongated ears of their lover. He will look no further than the elf when he sees the cutest waifu.

Still others see no reason to look further than a human to find their waifu.

And even beyond the physical comes the personality of the waifu in question. Some like their women fiesty, some like them docile and nervous, and some like them everywhere between and beyond. All of this is all ensconced in the overarching idea of the Waifu.

We have much we could teach you, outlander, of love and adventure, if only you extend your hand to us instead of your blade.
>>20664749
We must not force anyone to walk our path, my child, for that goes against everything we stand for.
>>
>>20664886

I think he's gone, Sir Sage.
>>
>>20664774
He can't get that far, it's miles till he reaches any of our neighbours, and there are plenty who can see a guilty conscience, even when the owner hides. I just hope this man doesn't cross the Illithids on his way.
>>
>>20664886
>>20664952
No I am here I just needed to think. Blood has stained my blade for too long, it is I who need to seek the truth.
>>
>>20665002

If he does survive, we will be invaded. We must convert everyone to Waifuism.
>>
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>>20665023
I don't want to force anyone to our philosophy, that's simply not our way to enslave someone to conditions they don't want to endure.

However, I am willing to hunt a spy who threatens our homes, our women, and our freedom to love as we please.

Let's ride again, my brothers.
>>
>>20665023
You forget that we have dragons and celestials in our domain, not to mention the traps that our more devious waifus like the mighty arachne can concoct. Only a fool would march on Teegee, for such an action would recall all Harem Knights from their adventuring in the defense of their waifus.
>>20665023
Have you learned nothing?!
>>
Why hasn't this thread been archived yet?
>>
>>20665023
look to my cries for just such a thing brother. Now look to the sage who guided me away from such poisonous thoughts, let him guide you too.
>>
>>20665113

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/20660866/
>>
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>>20665154
It is a glorious day for Waifus.
>>
>>20665154

Our plans shall remain ever eternal, questing knights of Teegee.
>>
>>20665189

For Teegee! For the waifus!
>>
>>20665154

Of all the ides we've come up with, the Harem Knights of TeeGee are my favorite, by far.

Captcha = bro, aspire
Yes, Captcha, we did aspire, aspired with the flaming heart of glorious waifu love!
>>
>>20665260

Harem Knights of Teegee should be a quest thread.
>>
>>20665271

I... would monitor that thread.
>>
>>20665271
That would be interesting. It would be equal parts 4e quest and adventure quest. Just make sure you play it and the waifu collection for laughs and dont try to get all serious about it like MGQ.
>>
>>20665322

We would have the largest harem.
>>
>>20665367
You could even play it a little like pikmin or pokemon or something. Combine elf waifu and arachne waifu to receive fancy rugs and hats, combine succubus waifu and angel waifu to receive the most adept diplomat duo you have ever seen, and so on. If only you can get them to get along, that is.
>>
>>20665389

I want to play it.
>>
>>20665389
>>20665399
It would be like ME2 except there is no pretense of you doing anything but going on quests to collect waifus. And it would actually be good.
>>
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>>20665367

The largest and more glorious harem held together with love and kindess, equality and loyalty.
>>
>>20665433
>>20665434

Someone needs to make the thread. This is our greatest quest.
>>
Those whom I aspire to call Brothers, I wish to join the Kingdom of the Waifu. I offer not my sword, which I cannot wield, nor my hands, which cannot craft. I offer to your service my mind. I have studied this thread, and very few have considered the laws of the land. In my days of /tg/ activities, I have found myself often being called upon to describe and pass judgement on the laws of our fantasy mechanics. Yes, I am a Rules Lawyer. One who fights not for personal gain, but to make sure the games are fair for all, justice in it's own way. While the Harem Knights may travel to exotic lands to seek out new waifus, and others stay to craft the tools of survival, there must be someone in the back of the castle settling the mundane legalese so that all may be satisfied. Can I join you, in your quest to establish a Waifutopia?

>Call nglebm

Yes, call Nglebm. I'm sure he can provide a good reference.
>>
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>>20665434
But of course. There would be a lot of catfights between jealous waifus to smooth over. Sometimes involving actual cats.
>>
>>20665465
The Kingdom of Teegee is open to all who hold the light of Waifu in their hearts, even if you can do no more than till a field or bake cookies.
>>
>>20665465

All our welcome to our Kingdom, so long as they honor the Harem Knight bro-tract.
>>
>>20665465

You may administrate, potential brother, as long as you leave those whose best suited to do there jobs, adhere to the bro-pact, and just make sure everything runs smoothly in an administrative position.
>>
>>20663170
This thread is full of CN worshippers of Lamashtu
>>
>>20665465
Our administration is filled with loadsa demons since the hells love their rules and bureaucracy, so you may be a little outclassed, but I'm sure they'll be rather endeared by your efforts. Hope you like to bed the reds, because they're awfully friendly.
>>
>>20665561

Just be sure to ask if they are... "alone" and not in another Knights Harem.
>>
>>20665577
Well yes, they would never make a move on another knight if they are spoken for. Like I said, demons are sticklers for rules.
>>
>>20665561
>>20665529
>>20665489
>>20665486

I thank you, Brothers. I swear fealty to the Kingdom of the Waifu, and the rulers thereof. I swear to uphold the bro-tract, and shall never trespass upon another's waifu. For one's Waifu is dearest, and to impress yourself upon one already taken is to sully the very concept of the Waifu, as well as an insult to your Bro. I carry the Light of the Waifu in my heart, and long shall it burn.
>>
>>20665648

Join us on an adventure one day. You could find your waifu there.
>>
>>20665648
And make sure yo upvote the fuck out of this thread on suptg.
>>
>>20665736

You don't need many if you don't want. My plan is to find "The one" before I retire from adventuring and become the Captain of the Homeguard.
>>
>>20665737
Done.

>>20665736
I shall, once I feel I have earned my right to stay in your Glorious Waifutopia.

>farmer Brodea
I don't know who farmer Brodea is, but he sounds like a pretty cool guy.
>>
>>20665800

When you take the bro-tract, you earned your right to stay in Teegee.
>>
I have just completed a writefag dedicated to this thread. Should I post it here or elsewhere because this thread might be autosaging already?
>>
>>20666327
Post it in a new thread so we can actually make this a setting. I actually might writefag something else, too. D-did you guys like my first bit?
>>
>>20666341

Yes.

Did the envoy get the axe for thinking it's okay to get it on with monsters or did he leave his Kingdom to join Teegee?

>>20666327

New thread, link it to us here.
>>
>>20666360
I was trying to imply that he eloped to Teegee in order to get himself a waifu.
>>
>>20666372

Did he find a beautiful waifu?
>>
>>20666465

Is there such a thing as a Waifu that isn't beautiful?
>>
>>20666479

What if one likes ugly waifus?
>>
>>20666465
No.
Of course he did. He lives a happy life with a hyperactive harpy who delivers his essays on Waifu to the world over and a lazy catgirl who never cleans up after herself, except for when he isn't looking.
>>
>>20666341
>>20666360
New Thread: >>20666515
>>
>>20666490
Then she would be beautiful to him.


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