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/tg/ - Traditional Games


File: 1350851556541.png-(90 KB, 300x300, Erik the Lich.png)
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You are Sir Daniel, an old hero long dead, or were, until Erik the Lich resurrected you to be his helper.

Fortunately, Erik is the laziest man you've ever known, and only wants to read erotica. But you're a good servant, and want to help your master by clearing the ladder to the top.

Last time you found Clarice in a glorified mental hospital, had a quick therapy session and talked with Clarice.

You left and went to Umbra's mountain, alone, as the smoke would kill your living things.

You fought off a few of Umbra's golems, shattering them with your hammer.

Inside the volcano you found his "living" area, more like a cave filled with maps and tables with records of previous wars.

You tried as best you could, but your attacks couldn't hurt a man made of smoke in a volcano.

Umbra's golems threw you into the lava, but it wasn't enough to stop you. But it did destroy all your gear, apart from your dragontooth hammer.

You climbed out, glowing white hot, and glassed everything just by touching it.

You left the volcano, leaving Umbra trapped in a glass prison.

Back at Adrian's house you got some clothing and left off for home, so Erik could tell you how to destroy Umbra for good.

Once back you got side tracked and explored the mountain you cleared out, and inspected the Dragonstone Obelisk.

Erik gave you a phylactery detection tool calibrated for Umbra, and with it you found his phylactery.

A necklace hidden in a sketch book. You destroyed the book, and crushed the necklace.

Areal came to claim Umbra, but you warded her off and made a new deal regarding him.

You are standing in Umbra's room, alone.

What do you do?
>>
see if there are any other books we didn't destroy that have value to erik?
>>
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/21209759/
Previous thread.

>>21225633
All the books were burnt by your glassing, only the sketchbook survived because it was holding the phylactery.

What do you do?
>>
>>21225657

So how many people are there still on our hit-list? It's somewhat hard keeping track of our body count.
>>
>>21225726
However many there are, they're all on other contenents.
This is going to take a while.
>>
>>21225726
Total kill count
Roland
Beric
Mort (Redemption)
Janus
Salin
John
Nomad
Umbra

There are 4 left.

What do you do?
>>
We need to conference with Erik, see if he has found any new targets. Also, pick up that siege bow.
>>
>>21225790
Do you wish to return home?
>>
>>21225825

Yes.
>>
Let's check for any interesting curios, then return to the port. We should ask Hydra if he could use our help under the water.
>>
>>21225825
return to the manor, time to check up on our gear
also, while transversing the ocean, see if we can commune with hydra and obtain any new sea style powers
>>
>>21225825
Did any of the diamond golems survive? We might as well take a new garden ornament with us.
>>
>>21225850
You leave Umbra's room, and cave the tunnel in once more.

You know a faster way back to Sileo now so the journey goes by in a day.

Back at the docks you find someone clamping your boat.

>"Should of paid the first ticket then, eh?"

The man laughs and walks away, bot realizing that you're just going to cut the rope and bugger off.

Once aboard the ship you cut the rope, and bugger off, leaving the clamp stuck to the pier.

>>21225861
You ask Hydra if there's any goings on under the water.
>"Deep ones stir, the merrfolk are getting ready for war, and fissures are moving the Old City of Impossibilities. But at the moment, everything is stable. If anything does occur, I shall send a servant to get your aid."

>>21225892
No new powers as of right now.
Can't really think of any that'd aid a skeleton...

After days and nights upon the waves you make port once again, tied up, you walk the Sea Road back to Gallowmere.

Your new siege bow is ready.

You pay the blacksmith his dues and request he fletch some arrows with the diamonds from the Golems.

>"It'll be tricky, aye, but I think I ca' do it. Come back next Friday, I should have a few for you to practice with."

The smith takes the bag of diamond shards and sets to grinding them down.

Your new siege bow is similar to your old one, but the wood is darker and the string a bit more taught.

What do you do?
>>
>>21225955
Give it a test shot, towards somewhere we know isn't important. We need to make sure it feels right.
>>
bring down that olf keep the elementalist was using. see if siege bow lived up to it's name.
>>
File: 1350853288150.jpg-(77 KB, 640x400, 1337186633294.jpg)
77 KB
>>21225955
For powers, how about the ablility to spin our apendeges fast enough to act as a propeller underwater?
Pic also related.
>>
>>21225955
we practice, ,make sure we can use the damn thing
>>
>>21225986
You take your new bow out of the town, into a clearing in the woods.

You notch and arrow.

>>21226002
Roll 1d20 for accuracy to hit the castle.

>>21226004
Inertia would scatter your bones.

>>21226010
You've used it before, many a time.

What do you do?
>>
>>21226004
or we can waterbend, control an area of water through sheer intimidation
>>
Rolled 17

>>21226014
lets hit it
>>
Rolled 7

>>21226014
Rolling
>>
rollan
>>
Rolled 1

whoops.
>>
Rolled 19

>>21226014
BAM
>>
>>21226030
You take aim and loose the arrow at the mountain Castle.

You feel the familiar sonic boom as the arrow accelerates past Mach 1.

A few moments later you see a cloud of smoke and dust rise out of the trees.

>>21226052
You're feeling good about this new bow.

You notch and loose another arrow, this one flies faster and straighter.

Another cloud of dust rises into the skyline where Beric's castle stands.

You march along through the forest, soon you arrive at the main gates, two giant skeletons are still stuck to the wall where you pinned them so long ago.

You look up, the tower Beric once stood upon has fallen to ruin, and in the last few hours, it would seem. You see parts of your arrows sticking out of softer parts of the tower.

What do you do?
>>
>>21226095
retrieve them, return to the mansion
time to check up on our lazy apprentices
>>
>>21226095
Dance a little jig of glee.
>>
>>21226095
Admire our handiwork for a bit. Head to the top of the tower, enjoy the view, destroy it a little bit more for some catharsis and then head home.
>>
>>21226095
Talk to erik, see if we can get a new communication spell
>>
File: 1350853963207.jpg-(28 KB, 360x261, proceed.jpg)
28 KB
>>21226095
Good. A quick check to see if there's anyone squatting. Perhaps later remodel this keep to use a s a secondary fortress, run by the apprentices. Much later, though.

Otherwise, proceed as planned, rendezvous with Eric, the Succubus and Rebecca. Perhaps set out on a quest to forge a new sword?
>>
>>21226124
Note: See "Pieces" the two arrows are gone.

>>21226127
You do a little jump, and click your heels mid air like a 90's sitcom final scene.

>>21226128
You climb to the top of the tower and look out over the land.

You see the seas and mountains stretching out
over the horizon, and down far bellow you see Gallowmere, with Erik's manor resting on a hill.

>>21226132
You return to the manor house and go to ask Erik for a communication spell.

>"Sorry, Daniel, but the best I can do is a talking conch. I could make another one, but that's it. Try not to lose it in lava."

>>21226151
You're sitting in Erik's library, Erik's reading his novels, Rebecca is also buried deep in words.

Areal is filing her nails.

What do you do?
>>
>>21226132
This, this is important.
>>
>>21226194
Just stand there. Awkwardly.
>>
>>21226194
Get another Conch, grumble about Erik sucking at magic.

Sit down by Rebecca, read over her shoulder, see if she wants to talk.
>>
>>21226213
Pretend to be a suit of armor.
Stand in the hallway and wait for people to walk by.
Wait for the laughtrack to play.
>>
>>21226249
Right in a spot where a suit of armor doesn't belong
>>
>>21226227
Oh god, Daniel is just like that creepy uncle who shows up on xmas stinking of vodka and crushed dreams.

"So, anybody up for a game of Agricola? Uno? Monopoly?"
>>
>>21226263
Do we Catan?
>>
>>21226263
Except we mostly just smell like bones.
>>
>>21226213
When they ask what your problem is, announce loudly that you need a hobby
>>
>>21226213
The silence that radiates off of you makes any surrounding sound so much louder.

The scraping of a file on nails is like a hacksaw through wood.

The sound of pages turning is like great paper tomes falling from the roofs of towers.

Areal breaks your silence.

>"Fuck me, just stop. How are you doing that?"

>>21226227
Erik has one he prepares earlier. You tie it to your belt for later use.

You take a peak over Rebecca's shoulder.

>The Science of the Necromatic Arts. Reduce, Reuse, Recycle.

"Would you like to talk, Rebecca?"

>"No, Uncle, I'm reading. And all our talks are arguments, or therapy. And you don't pay for the latter."

>>21226249
You stand outside the library door, but no one walks by for a while. Everyone's doing something, or know who the 6'6 suit of armour is.

>>21226269
You have no notion of what Catan is.

What do you do/
>>
>>21226285
Now stare at her awkwardly. Let that irritating silence get good and unbearable before finally saying "Hi."
>>
>>21226285
We really do need a hobby.
Maybe we could take up forging. That should save us some dosh next time we're flung into a lake of molten rock.
>>
>>21226285
Loudly announce from outside the library that you need a hobby.
>>
>>21226311
We already left the room, I think.
Even better. We just stick our head around the door and stare.
>>
>>21226194

Instaed of a talking conch, can he do the spell on our skull and have the sound come out of our nose hole?
>>
>>21226331
Bonus points if we lower our head down from an impossible angle, like the top of the door frame.
>>
>>21226339
No. Our pelvis. We don't talk out our asses nearly enough.
>>
Perhaps we could scour the markets of the world looking for a replacement blade? Last one got melted in the volcano. A backup weapon is always good, especially so if it is as versatile as a sword.
>>
>>21226285
"My own niece doesn't want to talk to me. Wow, I feel unloved."
>>
You reenter the library.

>>21226311
You lock eyes with Areal.

In the span of moments an infinity passes between you as she gazes into the hollow sockets of your skull, where if you had eyes, they'd be the wide staring kind of a mad man.

>"No, not doing it."

Areal turns back to her nail file.

"I need a hobby!"

>"Yes, you do."
Everyone in the room says in unison.

>>21226349
>>21226339
>>21226341
>"There's a difference between a conch, and a magically animate skeleton. If I can, I'll do it. But as it stands, I can't."

>>21226351
There's only one blacksmith in the area, and his swords are really good for your kind of job.

>>21226373
>"Well, Uncle, if you didn't come to me like a whimpering quim all the time, I feel like we'd be on better terms. But as of right now, I'm reading, and you're moaning."

Her words, they sting!

What do you do?
>>
>>21226285
"Can we talk about something other than therapy without arguing then?"
>>
>>21226392
>"You only know the world through the field of battle and that red-tinted vision that follows your blood lust. I'm a thinker, you're a homicidal nutter. What could we honestly talk about?"

Well?
>>
>>21226390
"Screw you guys, I'm going home" The just stand there.
>>
>>21226392
Nah, fuck'em. Let's go get Stumbles and hit Mort's. Just like the old times.
>>
>>21226410
"And I'm proud as hell of you for being a thinker. Honestly you're one of the few people who could outdo me in being a homicidal nutter if you put your mind to it, but you chose a better path.

We can talk about baking, theology, travel. I'm trying here Rebecca, meet me half way."
>>
>>21226410
"You know, despite homocidal and nutter being two good words to describe me, they're not the only ones suited to that. Here's a thought, what do you know about history from my era?"
>>
>>21226390
S-she just called us a vagina. That's not cool, tell her to watch her mouth!
>>
>>21226410
"History? Theology? The history of dance as an art form and how it has shaped our culture as we know it?"
>>
>>21226410
"I made that fucking elf tolerate me and you're nowhere near as asspained. I swear to Hydra, I am not going to be closer to the damned elf than my own flesh and blood, pardon the pun."
>>
>>21226412
>"But you live here..."
Areal stares at you, wondering why no one else is as confused as her.

She's regretting setting up here in the manor, things were so much simpler in the central hells.

Things went as she said, and her word was law. But in Erik's manor, logic and reason, even that belonging to demons, goes on holiday.

>>21226432
>"For now, I feel it's unfair to judge you without doing what you do. I'll be leaving for a little while soon, when I come back with a new view on life we'll talk about your profession."

>"You? Talk about theology? Uncle, you God only gives you advice on how to kill better, and the tools to do it. Travel? I know you robed that ship, Uncle, that was naughty. And baking? You can't cook for shit."

>>21226434
>"More than you, obviously."

>>21226435
Eh, someone caught on.

>>21226469
>"I'm not talking about dance as a combat form, or how it's shaped our culture, which it hasn't."

Rebecca doesn't want to reciprocate with the talking.

What do you do?
>>
>>21226498
>>21226412
>But you live here...
Ok, I lost it for a second there. Good show guys.
>>
>>21226498
"You're leaving? Do you know how to defend yourself?"
>>
>>21226498
"I gave it all back. It was a security test. From now on every one of those travelers is going to be more careful and protect themselves better from actual bad people.

I have an eternity to learn baking so I might just pick it up. You'll see when I make perfect cake. I'll show you.

Where are you planning on going? Are you prepared? Do you have a sword? Are you good with it?

I know I'm as you call me a 'homicidal nutjob' but I do want you to stay safe and a lot of that is being able to defend yourself. Let me teach you something, it's all I'm good for apparently."
>>
>>21226518
ask her if she requires escort and offer the apprintaces.
>>
>>21226498
"I know about gods other than Hydra, I chat it up with the retard god all the time! Also, I totally dance for fun all the time, and it has shaped our culture. It is now considered an acceptable form of prayer to Hydra because its that awesome."
>>
>>21226545
"I won't even draw a moustache on you."
>>
>>21226498
"HEY. I can too cook! I'm the best cook ever! YOU CAN'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO. YOU'RE NOT MY REAL MOM." And then we run from the room sobbing, as elegantly as we entered.
>>
>>21226599
We're not leaving the room. Come on. We're finally managing something vaguely resembling a conversation with Rebecca. Don't ruin it.
>>
>>21226545
>>21226518
Nah, this is something she has to do herself. It's the old adventurer's call. Wish her luck.
>>
>>21226610
Fine, but that's how we're leaving when we finally get bored. We can just yell it at areal.
>>
>>21226518
>"When you're training those three I'm watching and practicing with Stumbles, he's pretty good with a rapier."

This is a development. It's that adventurer blood, it demands violence and exploration or it'll drive her mad.

>"And I'll be leaving in the week. I'll be back in a while, don't worry. I've got my stuff packed and everything."

>>21226545
>"Oh yeah, "security"... And I wouldn't eat anything that you make, ever, lest I wake up with Erik standing over you and all my flesh gone."

Rebecca closes her book.

>"I have a sword and armour, Uncle, and what good would it be to see the world if I had to be protected at every turn? No thanks, I can look after myself. I'm your niece, remember?"

>"I don't feel you could show me much in my fighting style. You're more like a crazed berserker, I'm a lot more elegant."

>>21226560
>"Mentally challenged, Uncle. Retard isn't socially acceptable. Dance isn't important, and only you pray like that, because no one has the balls to tell you to stop."

>>21226571
>"I would shatter your bones if you did."

>>21226599
Rebecca puts her book to one side and opens another, Erik flips his pages.

>"I'm sorry, but what? What the fuck? No one has anything to say on the giant skeleton screaming about his mother and doing a fake sob as he stormed from the room?"

>"Nope."
Erik flips a page.

>>21226610
You walk back in to no one's surprise.

What do you do?
>>
>>21226611
We had an idea of how to defend ourselves before we set out. We're making sure she has decent equipment and working knowledge of what to do in situations she's likely to encounter, and she's going as part of a group.
>>
>>21226623
Challenge her to a cook off
>>
>>21226498

Fellow Englander (if that's a word) from a few threads ago. I am the one who knows oif the quim. I've been lurking quietly mostly since then. Loving the thread, btw.
>>
>>21226623
Dance is SO important. It makes people happy! It attracts attractive mates! It is a form of expression that varies culturally! And Hydra said it was awesome! Do you know better than a god?
>>
>>21226649
>"No."
Ouch, blunt...

>>21226655
Englishman is a word. But feel free to post and influence the story as you see fit.


>>21226662
With the cold, calm certainty that brings pride to your souls Rebecca says.
>"Yes."

She doesn't address the other points.

What do you do?
>>
>>21226623

Tell Rebecca that we won't allow her to go unless she spars with us and can hold her own to some extent.
>>
>>21226623
"I'm not going to come with you, but allow me to worry about you a bit.

And Rebecca, have you actually seen me fight? Sure there's a lot of rage there, lots of raw strength and so on, but I'm extremely good at it. If it was just a crazed berserker I wouldn't have won against a lot of my opponents. There aren't any wasted movements, I play to my strengths but I'm not a frothing berserker, I'm extremely precise.

I'm asking you to let me just teach you a bit. Make sure my niece is going out to see the world prepared. Please."
>>
>>21226623
"A rapier, eh? Just how good are you with it?"
>>
>>21226677
Tell her to stop being such a cunt and ban her from reading those necromancy books.
>>
File: 1350856375477.jpg-(123 KB, 333x366, I don't think so.jpg)
123 KB
>>21226623
>Dance isn't important
Don't you EVER say that thing to me again!
>>
>>21226677
We're making a total fool of ourselves here.
It's glorious.
>>
>>21226677
"I heard a yes, therefore I'm cooking. I also heard a no, therefore you don't know better than a god. Well, maybe the 'mentally deficient' god."
>>
>>21226689
Don't insult our niece. We're trying to make progress here.
>>
>>21226689
No, that's valuable adventuring knowledge
>>
Wait, how many members of our family are still alive save Rebecca?
>>
>>21226677
"Ok, I'm assuming you're not going into this like an idiot. You know what herbs are edible, what ones are good for medical purposes, but do you know which ones will get you high as a kite? Very important adventuring knowledge, sometimes you're in the woods for months bored out of your mind."
>>
>>21226711
We were a professional murderhobo. We lost track of how many barmaids, grateful maidens, and various other women we slept with. It's been 150 years. We probably have relatives everywhere. But we don't know about the location of any of them other than Rebecca and her immediate family.
>>
"Bloody Hell, can't I get a single laugh out of you? I know I'm not the best jester, but I can usually get a smirk by now."
>>
>>21226711
Rebecca and her epileptic mother we forget about
>>
>>21226680
>"Fine, fine, see me in the yard in a few minutes."

>>21226684
>"I'll admit, I've never seen you fight. But from what you say, and that hammer, it isn't pretty. And what good is my rapier going to do against you? But fine, if I hold my own for 5 minutes you stop crying about it."

>>21226689
>"No, free world, free choice. And I'd just ask Erik or Mort about it."


>>21226695
>"Dance. Isn't. Important."

Now you've never hit a child, well, hard... But this one needs a good throttling.

>>21226711
None. Her father died to wolves, and her mother and brother got ill during your time loop.

>>21226746
>"You'll get nothing from me."
Her face is as stoic as a mountain. She'll have a death glare to be proud of.

Rebecca leaves to get her gear.

What do you do?
>>
>>21226677
"Since you're reading about necromancy, I'm going to assume you're open to learning about magic. Here's a suggestion: learn alchemy, learn how to make potions of sustenance and healing. They'll save your life, trust me."
>>
>>21226677

>tfw simple words escape your mind.

I'm tired, okay? ;_;

We should check on Stumbles, btw. We haven't brought him any fancy trinkets or hugged him in a while.
>>
>>21226765
Stare at Areal in the meantime.
>>
>>21226765
Tell Eric and Areal not to answer any necromancy questions. Not that Eric could, but anyway.
>>
>>21226771
After this. Kiddo needs bonding time
>>
>>21226765
pick up one of the training swords
head outside and start a few exercises, ask the boys to observe, correct techniques, spar with them while we wait, the best way to learn is to teach, so they must know be able to spot even our flaws in finesse
>>
>>21226792
I don't think we care all that much, we're a skeleton harboring a demon, we killed the pope, and our master is a porn-addicted lich
>>
>>21226765
Glare at Areal for a minute before leaving.

Get to the yard and get ourself a training sword. When we see Rebecca tell her that she never knows what she's going to be up against so she should have various weapons available, at the very least a bow and a hammer.
>>
>>21226818
Not glare, just blankly stare. Quietly.
>>
>>21226824
When we head out to the yard, do this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j-fzaoi_Jgo
>>
This is going to be one of those moments where we either A. Have to let her win or B.Lose to her mary sue skills
>>
>>21226842
Or C. Beat her and teach her until she's ready to leave.
>>
>>21226842

But we're like ridiculously good, and she's our blood, so it's only natural that she's awesome.
>>
>>21226842
All she has to do is hold her own for five minutes.

She's going to be good but she's never really worked at it like we have. We still ought to be better.
>>
>>21226786
Areal leaves the room for her boudoir.

>"Don't tease the demons, Daniel. It's not nice and you're better than that."

>>21226792
>"Daniel, as of right now, I'm the greatest necromancer on the planet. But if the child wishes to learn, I'm going to teach her. You can't stop her making her own decisions."

>>21226824
>>21226818
It's the same thing for you, really.

You make your way outside and pick up a training sword.

Soon enough Rebecca comes out, she's wearing light plate and hard leather, with a full helm. In her right hand in a meter long rapier, the point nearly invisible. On the left is her shield, a small wooden one with steel around the edge.

>"OK, Uncle, let's go."
Rebecca lifts the rapier upto her face and raises her shield.

>>21226842
She's a 16 year old girl. You could beat her to death with her own hands. She's your kin, but she's not you.

What do you do?
>>
>>21226765
We should spar with a sword. The hammer is harder to mock-fight with.
>>
Rolled 11

>>21226883
Charge her with the hammer raised for an overhead smash, bash her with the handle at the last second. Only hard enough to bruise
>>
>>21226883
get into a classic defensive stance
gesture her to come at us
'come, let me see how you fight offensively'
>>
>>21226883
Play avoidence for now. Get a look at her stance and footwork.
>>
>>21226765
Evangelize her in the ways of Dancing.

"Beyond the silly cabrioles, and the ditsy spins, there lies the building blocks of the primordial language of Kinetism. Master your form, your balance, your stride and strike, and you shall master the art of battle."
>>
>>21226904
We're using a sword.
>>
Rolled 83

>>21226883
Now is the time friends now is the time we roll to dance!
>>
Ask her if she'd like us to hold back a bit, or hold nothing ba--ah, who am I kidding? She'd most likely want us to come at her with everything we've got. She's a smart kid, she can hold out against our full might for 5 minutes....right?
>>
>>21226883
Use our wooden training sword. Don't use our hammer or real sword.

When we fight her do it with elegance, show some grace and precision. Don't mock her in the fighting but show her any weak points she has. Prove that we aren't a mindless berserker, just that we're extremely good at this.
>>
>>21226912
This.
We float like an undead butterfly and our chest is full of bees.
>>
>>21226883
"Come at me, lets see how you press an assault"
>>
>>21226927
i agree with this
>>
Rolled 57

>>21226925
And a backup roll
>>
>>21226926
We exploded a soul and smashed a golem made of fucking diamond
>>
>>21226883
Teach her to dance the danse macabre
>>
>>21226904
You've only got the training sword.

>>21226908
"Come get some."

This angers her.

Rebecca makes her way towards you, slowing checking the ground for loose footing.

>>21226912
"Beyond the silly cabrioles, and the ditsy spins, there lies the building blocks of the primordial language of Kinetism. Master your form, your balance, your stride and strike, and you shall master the art of battle."

Rebecca attempts to strike you in the gaps between your plate.

>>21226925
But your moves are too fresh. You dance past her strike and trip her up.

She's sprawled out on the ground and you tap her helmet.

"Dead. Don't get angry unless you can use it to your advantage."

Rebecca knocks your sword away and rises.

What do you do?
>>
>>21226949

...Well. Shit. Bring out the wooden sword, then.
>>
>>21226969
Feints. See how well she can read a foe.
>>
>>21226969
Kick her in the nuts.
>>
>>21226969
"You know how 'let us dance' came to refer to fighting? Because its just like a dance. Your movements are based on your partners. See what they do and react accordingly. Be swift, be graceful, move with the force of your whole body. This is how you dance the danse macabre"
>>
>>21226969
continue, be on the defensive, while taking apart her assault easily, each time tell her whats she is doing wrong and how to fix it
>>
>>21227000
She's fighting us with nuts?
>>
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>>21227000
I THINK YOU ARE CONFUSED.
>>
>>21227000

in the quim*
>>
>>21226969

She wants another go? Very well then. Can't say I fault her for wanting a rematch. Might as well use this to try hammering some lessons into that head of hers. She'll probably go on the journey regardless of the results, but at least we can try teaching her what we know, and damn it, this is probably the closest thing we have to bonding with her.
>>
>>21227000
No, none of that. She's our niece.
>>
>>21226969
"Watch your form. Keep your grip loose and everything flowing freely until the moment of impact. Don't waste your energy on a tight grip and tense muscles until the right moment.

Everything should flow, one move to another. React to what the other does and carry that through to your own offensive.

Again, come at me."
>>
Rolled 79

>>21226969
again giver her tips and help tell her were we are open and how to make wholes in our guard

after insist she take the apprentices with her as a guard every adventure needs a party
>>
>>21227022
I have to wonder how many people knew that word before it showed up in the avengers movie and everyone heard about it.

Anyway, fight dirty. See how well she can respond to unorthedox attacks.
>>
Switch between training her in defensive, offensive, and dirty tricks. Teach her to -win-. Also, take that earlier Anon's idea and recommend taking up alchemy.
>>
>>21227011
Nope, kick off the purse of nuts her father used to eat that she always carries around to remind her of him. Get her more riled up.
>>
>>21227051
Now that is just uncalled for
>>
>>21227047
Oh, and we should go over her pack and make sure it will actually keep her alive
>>
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>>21227051
YOU ARE AN EVIL LITTLE MAN.
EXCELENT.
>>
>>21227059

Well she does need to be prepared for such things in the real world... being as awful as possible here will better prepare her for later.
>>
>>21227044
No. This is her adventure. All we can do is prepare her. If we want her to grow we can't send people with her, a true adventuring party grows over the journey. We have to respect the fact that she wants to set out on her own.
>>
Rolled 53

>>21226969
DANCE LIKE THE WIND!
>>
Rolled 62

>>21227104
Backup Roll
>>
>>21227051
You could actually mention his father, anger her, play with her feelings and then masterfully defeat her to humble and humiliate her. And the lesson would sink in. After that, she would need consoling. IF we play this correctly, the bond between Rebecca and Daniel could grow. Talk to her about loss, about being trust into a life she did not choose by a complete skeletal stranger, About having to cope with the undead, with brutes, with demons and monsters when all she wanted was a peaceful live. About how she misses her actual family and apologize for not being there with her and taking for granted her presence and loyalty.

Damm, that girl has some issues.
>>
>>21227130
Or she'll be really pissed at us.
>>
>>21227084
maybe keep her back for a month, and in that time, train her with the lads, teach her skills beyond that of combat, but plenty of combat also
>>
>>21227130
Oh come on, that's just mean. We don't play with her feelings like that. We can try to grow closer, but we don't manipulate her like that. We can apologize for not being there, we can comfort her, but we don't do that.
>>
>>21227130
No.
We didn't really know his father, did we?
And even if we did, let's not go there and insult our own family or play with such ties.
>>
>>21227163
Agreed, we're trying to make up for traumatizing people. Except Adrian, who totally gets off on it
>>
Rolled 29

>>21227110
YOUR DANCE FU IS WEAK
>>
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>>21227084
>she has a mess of adventures with her new friends
>starts falling for the cute cleric
>they both like eachother, everyone can tell
>too shy to talk about it openly
>everything is adorable
>rogue misses a trap, cleric is caught in it
>he dies before she can tell him she loves him
>our cynical little niece snaps when the first person she's ever idealized, ever truly loved, is gone
>his god doesn't tolorate raising of any kind
>she becomes pic related.

I'm a terrible person, I know.
>>
Rolled 92

>>21227187
AS IS YOURS!
>>
>>21227187
This isn't real combat, he hasn't asked for dice rolls
>>
>>21227199
finaly a decent roll
>>21227200
we always need to roll to dance tho
>>
>>21227000
You break apart her nut sack, scattering apart her cashew lunch.

>"My nuts!"

You spar with her for a little while, giving her tips on her moves.

Eventually you can see slight improvements.

"You know how 'let us dance' came to refer to fighting? Because its just like a dance. Your movements are based on your partners. See what they do and react accordingly. Be swift, be graceful, move with the force of your whole body. This is how you dance the danse macabre"

>"OK, fine, so maybe it is useful, what of it?"

>>21227032
>"Fine, yeah, sure."
She lets her arm loosen up before attacking, it's a little harder to block, but you still have no problems.
>>21227045
>>21227047
You let her get in close, almost touching you.

>"Ah ha! Almost have you no, Unc-"
You throw a handful of sand into her eyes.
>"What was that?! Fight fair!"

"There is no fair in battle, only life and death. Get used to it."

You ask her who she's traveling with.

>"I found a group looking for a fighter, and I'm the only one that can read. We're guarding a caravan going to the port, then Kerm."

>>21227130
>"Uncle, if it wasn't for you my mother and father still would of died, and I'd be alone in an empty house. I don't judge my housemates by appearances, they're good people. But thank you, all the same, for giving me a home. I know you can't be home all the time, your job demands it."

>>21227198
I don't know who that is.

>>21227199
You spend the rest of the fight dancing and slapping her with your blade.

Eventually she collapses from fatigue.

What do you do?
>>
>>21227219
Look longingly at the charcoal sticks and whisper, "later my pretties"
Then ask her what she has in her pack, how she plans to sustain herself in the wilderness, etc. Suggest that she take up alchemy and learn how to brew potions of sustenance, healing, and other useful things. Adventuring isn't all fighting skills.
>>
>>21227219
you are good, but i still wish i could train you for a while, must you go on this adventure? you show a lot of promise, and with work, i could make you formidable
>>
>>21227219

We take her into our arms and we tell her we've very proud of her.

Captcha: chivalry kenilab
>>
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>>21227219
>Doesn't know Yuno.
Oh, but are you missing out.
She's the postergirl of yandere. Literaly, they made posters.
>>
>>21227256

Fun girl, shitty manga/anime.
>>
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>>21227219
CONGRATULATE HER.
Tell her to go take a bath or something, sheesh.
She's going to be sore after all of this.

Also
> You break apart her nut sack, scattering apart her cashew lunch.

> >"My nuts!"
>>
>>21227219
"You did good Rebecca. You fought well, you learned fast, and you're much better than most everyone.

I wish you could stay for years so I could teach you everything I know, but I know what the call to adventure is like, I remember my own so very long ago."

Pick her up, carry her in our arms.

"I'm proud of you. Always remember to bring rope, chalk, climbing pitons, a telescoping pole, medical supplies, a spyglass, a pick, a lantern and lantern oil.

Now let's get you some dinner."
>>
>>21227283
And then we cook something and tell her someone else made it
>>
>>21227219
You have strong foundations. And a certain hunger all too familiar too me. You would be an excellent duelist, should you choose this path.
>>
>>21227293
We probably know how to cook. We spent a long time as a murderhobo, spent a lot of time in the wilderness. You learn to make a stew pretty damn fast if you live like that.
>>
>>21227293
BUT WHO?
Because she's known these people for longer than we have.
So yeah.
Awkward.
>>
>>21227243
>"Who are you talking to?"

"Hmm? No one, no one at all..."

You stare longingly at the sticks.

"I'll need to see your pack, to check how you'll survive and give some tips there."

She gladly accepts that one, at least you know how to pack a good pack.

>>21227244
>"I could train all my life, Uncle, but I'd never know the adventure. I'm going, and that's final."

>>21227250
>"Don't touch me."

>>21227256
I think I have a picture of her taking it in the arse somewhere...

>>21227281
Did you get that from the Fall of Cthulhu comic dump?

>>21227283
She picks herself up and wards you off.
>"I'm fine, really."
You give her your list of necessity. She thanks you for it.

What do you do?
>>
>>21227310
>"Daniel who made this?"
"Um. You did."
>"......"
"......"
>>
>>21227328
Could you share it?
>>
>>21227328
Cook her a lunch since we kicked her in the nuts.
>>
>>21227328
You pack that pack. Pack the hell out of that pack.
>>
>>21227328
have a sudden epiphany and realize you should totally take up alchemy as a hobby. Then realize you can't drink whatever potions you make.
>>
>>21227328
"Get some food Rebecca. I'll get started on packing. You'll be a great adventurer, I'm sure of it.

Bring one of Eric's conchs, if you ever need me I'll be there for you. I know I sound like a worrying grandmother, but you're important to me."
>>
>>21227389
adding to that if she would like to have an apprentice accompany her she may take one along.
>>
Oh wow, we're like a bunch of daddies all trying to make sure their daughteru is ready for the first day of school... "Is your backpack packed? Let me check it for you... To make friends you have to do so and so... Run away from scary old men! And if you want, you can call me any time. Are you sure you don't want me to walk you into the school on your first day?"
>>
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>>21227410
This is HER adventure, not ours. Do not steal this struggle from her.
>>
Put a note in her pack saying:

Dear Rebecca,
I hope you will find everything that you may need in here and, above all, I hope you remain safe.

Remember all that I have told you and remember that I love you.

Good luck, Uncle Dan.
>>
>>21227431
... Yes.

And we're going to insist on meeting her party and staring them down. She's going to complain that we're embarrassing her in front of her party.
>>
>>21227328
leave her to a hearty meal
then go see erik,
hey, could you make me another conch that links up with yours and mine? i want to give it to rebecca, just so she can call me for help if she needs it
>>
>>21227328
Make sure she has the essentials. A good supply of jerky and spices, something to boil water in, equipment to start a fire, maps, compass, wool blanket or two, extra socks, healing potions, rope, bandages, something to carry water in, a good tarp, knives, one of erik's conches, inclement weather clothing, and one or two of something you always remembered wanting but never actually brought with you.
>>
>>21227459
Lantern and oil, pick, hatchet, and a book or two. Also, ask if she'd like us to have Hydra bless her armor. Don't press the issue if she refuses though, no need to force our religion down her throat.
>>
>>21227356
No.

>>21227364
>>21227357
You tell her to go take a bath, you'll sort her pack out.

She agrees and goes inside.

You enter Rebecca's room, the condition is immaculate. Not a spot of dirt anywhere.

Boring.

You take her pack and open it on her bed.
The contents are
>Rope
>Lantern and oil
>Extending pole
>Fire anywhere kit
>Tinder box
>Guides to edible fungus and flora
>First aid kit
>Chalk
>Rune to central dictionary
>Knives
>Cutlery
>Maps
>Rain cloak

You drop in a conch, so you can call her every 5 minutes.

>>21227431
We'd be good parents, a bit extream, but good.

>>21227441
>Deer Rebekka
Aye hope u wil find evrything that u maye ned in here, aye hope u remane safe.

>Remembr al that aye have toled u and remembr that aye lov u.

You aren't skilled with word craft.

>>21227447
You make a note to inspect her party before she leaves. Put the fear of God in them.

>>21227459
You gather all of that and put it in her bag.

Rebecca is soaking in a bath.

What do you do?
>>
>>21227499
>>Deer Rebekka
>Aye hope u wil find evrything that u maye ned in here, aye hope u remane safe.
>>Remembr al that aye have toled u and remembr that aye lov u.
>You aren't skilled with word craft.
mebber we should werks on dat
>>
>>21227499
Go cook something. Find a chef's hat. Make a stew. You're an adventurer, you make the best stew.
>>
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>>21227328
Yes.
>>
>>21227499
Add in "Keep yer feet dry, fancy footwerk does naught if swampefoot be rooting yer toes"
>>
>>21227499
Make some stew for her. And try to make some fresh baked bread to go along with it.

After we get that made we'll go visit the party she's joining.
>>
>>21227525

We definately need to learn to read and write properly. Jesus Christ ...
>>
>>21227499
she is well prepared which is good, along with the note, leave a small bag of gold and silver coins, so that she wont be short of money on her journey
>>
>>21227554
Aye haff knowe eyedeeuh wat yew ar tokking abot
>>
Rolled 48

>>21227499
Not only are we an adventurer-- WE ARE A BUTLER.
Or were.
Sort of.
At one point, maybe.

Anyways, we can cook, can't we?
>>
>>21227549
do we want to risk her being caught, britches down in a bush cause of our cooking giving her splatteguts?
>>
>>21227525
Since when were we a 7 int barbarian?
>>
>>21227583
We wouldn't have survived as long as we did if our food weren't edible
>>
>>21227529
I dumped them.

>>21227527
You go into the kitchen, now that there's living things in the house it's been restocked.

You put on a big poofy hat and cook a stew. Leek, spring onion and deer, with carrot and potato. I feel like G.R.R.M!

>>21227554
You make a note to learn how to letters.

>>21227592
Since writing with actual skill is something for the upperclasses. You can write, just not well.

Your apprentices wander into the kitchen, asking what's for dinner.

What do you do?
>>
>>21227608
"Stew. It ought to be good.

Keep an eye on it and stir it occasionally, I'm going out for a little bit."

Track down the adventuring party, I think we need to politely introduce ourself and evaluate them.
>>
>>21227608
"Stew. Mostly for Rebecca since she's leaving soon, but you're welcome to a bowl. Actually, fuck that. Go fetch me a moose, I'm eating too."
>>
>>21227608
a hearty stew, something to make rebecca, i sparred with her a little in the yard, she needs more work, but wants to adventure, and she is one of the few people i cant intimidate into doing what i want
so, i am going to train you fellows harder, and then we are going to go with rebecca when she meets her adventurering party
>>
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>>21227529
>>
>>21227608
We shall make... the Potage Le Magnifique!
Remember to drop one gold coin in at the end, for reasons.
>>
>>21227608
Then thanks for being awesome.

Apprentices! Adventuring Apprentices!
If we're a cook, then they might as well be apprentice cooks!
Get them cutting and stirring and cleaning and working!
There better be white bread with this stew!

Also maybe they could tell us how it tastes.
As we lack tastebuds.
>>
>>21227608
assume hydra form and taste

>entrails nustomed
>>
>>21227608
Ask them if they can smell what Daniel's cooking.
Add more water, leek, spring onion and spice to compensate. Have a big hearty goodbye meal.
>>
>>21227645
We're making MOAR food, taking hydra form, and sitting down to eat with them.
>>
Rolled 2

>>21227639
>Remember to drop one gold coin in at the end, for reasons.
10/10.
>>
>>21227624
"Deer stew, keep an eye on it and don't tell Rebecca I made it."

You leave the manor to find her adventuring party.

It doesn't take long, they're spending the first half of their share at Mort's bar.

You can tell it's them, they're young and their armour is undented.

What do you do?


>>21227639
Why?
>>
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>>21227667
>>
>>21227682
order them a round, then sit with them
'so lads, whats happening?'
>>
>>21227682
Sit ourself right down between them and order a drink.

"So, you're adventurers are you? How long you been at this?"
>>
would anyone like my stew recipe? i think this one would be great if it was winter in quest.
>>
>>21227682
Strike up a conversation. Ask if there's anything they'd like to know from someone who is quite familiar with the roads ahead.

We a quest NPC now.
>>
>>21227682
>missing a skyrim reference
Come on, man. How'd you miss that?

Go up to the bar, real casual like. Buy them a round, start talking with them. Start asking some very pointed questions about their adventuring plans.
Try and figure out which one she'll fall for and lose, starting her on the path to full yandere
>>
>>21227722
This
Lets give them a high reward quest and see if they actually take it.
Have them promise to keep it a secret from Rebecca.
>>
>>21227727
But we already psychology tortured someone already, and she is still taking therapy 3 years later.
>>
>>21227716
Go for it. I love me a good stew.
>>
>>21227727
There is absolutely no need for that.
>>
>>21227716
TELL ME YOUR SECRETS, CHEF
>>
>>21227747
We're not going to drive any crazy. We're just going to play the overprotective undead-sorta-dad for a bit.
>>
Good god no our daughteru is not going to become a yandere, stop filling this quest with your animu faggotry.
>>
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>>21227700
You signal Mort to send another round over, he does so.

"So, lads, what's happening?"

>"Well, lad, we're drinking in celebration for out new job. Got hires the other day."

>"Thanks for the drinks, by the way. Do you know the owner?"

"A bit."

>>21227714
>"Well, we're pretty new. We've done some things before, like giant rats..."

>>21227722
>"Who are you anyway?"

"Sir Daniel, the Dancing Knight."

There's a sudden "Oh shit" moment.

>>21227716
Yes.

"I can give you all sorts of advice, kids, just ask."

>>21227692
Yeah, it's her.

What do you do?
>>
>>21227777
Don't tell them we're rebecca's uncle. Let them know about any dangers on the road ahead, recommend good inns, and and good ways to keep their stomachs full on the road ahead.
>>
>>21227777
"Calm down kids. I'm just here to talk.

Tell me about yourselves, if you have any questions about the adventuring gig just let me know."
>>
>>21227777
Damnnit man you can't just taunt my dick like that.
Let's be nice. Polite, affable, the works. We just know Rebecca's going to rant about us all during the trip, we need a good first impression.
>>
>>21227810
Or she'll keep her mouth shut about us because she has an ounce of common sense.
>>
>>21227777
Well. We also better make sure they don't tell REBECCA for example that they met the Dancing Knight.
Because then she'd know even more that we've been talking to them.

And while we're at it, let's not assert our habits on them.
Except tell them that whenever given the chance after battle they should scribble charcoal eyeglasses and mustaches on any fallen foes.
A valuable scare tactic, that one.
>>
>>21227777
"relax, I just want to give you a few pointers."
I don't know what kind of pointers they'd need, I'd imagine stuff regarding local monsters and the like
>>
>>21227828
Agreed, just tell them useful stuff adventurers should know.
>>
>>21227828
>Except tell them that whenever given the chance after battle they should scribble charcoal eyeglasses and mustaches on any fallen foes
hence forth this shall be known as the mark of Daniel.
>>
>>21227777
Tell them to use our name as a threat. For example, if someone ever asks them, "Oh yeah? Who are you?" Tell them to respond, "The Children of the Dancing Knight." Or if they're asked, "you and what army?" Tell them to respond with something similar, invoking our title in a suitably threatening manner.
With any luck, after a while, their explo its should become as famous as our own.Then, we could keep an eye on Rebecca by asking around about the Children of the Dancing Knight, and the rumors and stories should spread well enough for us to keep tabs on her and them.
>>
>>21227875
THE MARK OF THE DANCING KNIGHT.
>>
>>21227887
Oh come on dude, this is supposed to be rebecca's party. Don't piss her off by making her adventure under our shadow.
>>
>>21227901
agreed. voicing to cancel
>>
>>21227777
>pic
Something tells me it has been cut from bigger picture to meet "SFW" requirements of blueballed board such as /tg/... where would I find the original picture?
>>
>>21227801
"The road's dangerous, less so when I was your age, but still... Keep your wits about you."

>"That's common sense."

"Common sense is a fucking superpower, kid."

>>21227803
>"Well, uh, we're new to this whole thing. Going out for gold and glory, you know? We've done small jobs, but nothing like this, an ocean journey? Hell yes."

Kids these days... Back when you were going out, you were looking to make enough money to survive, not like these younguns...

You tell them about certain types of monster and how best to combat them, and how to find valuable food on the road.

The soak the information in like a sponge.

"And I swear to Hydra, if you tell Rebecca that I talked to you... You ever heard of my decompressing touch?"

They nod.

"Oh, I've got far worse... The decompression is fast, really fast. The drowning one, however..."

They get the message.

>>21227810
I can and I will.

You go over to the bar as Rebecca walks in.

You give her a little wave as you talk to Mort. She's none the wiser.

>"Ah, the young bird's leaving the nest?"
"Yeah."
>"Don't worry, it's only natural. Though most of the time kids find a normal job and move to a different street in the area.. They don't go off to kill things for money..."
"My little girl..."

You see Rebecca and her party in an alcove, talking.

What do you do?
>>
>>21227901
It might just save her life. We'd be doing her a favor. We're a very intimidating figure, even our name can scare the shit out of people.
>>
>>21227887
No, that'll just make them soft, and invite the ire of our enemies. They'll be fine.
>>
Ok, here's the ingredients list:
1 pint of heavy cream
2/3 stick butter
2-3 tablespoons of flour
2 small onions (chopped)
8 or so small potatoes (peeded and diced to personal preference)
half a bag of baby carrots, or about 1 and a half cups. (chopped)
2 1/2 cups of bacon bits
3 cups of grated mild cheddar cheese
paprika
Carribean Jerk spices (premixed or home made)
salt
pepper
Instructions:
boil the potatoes and diced carrots in a large pot, until tender. set aside liquid for later.

Dice the onions to desired side and place in a saucepan with the butter until golden brown and soft. while this is happening, add Jerk seasoning to them, along with some paprika. add plenty of both. then add in the flour, and mix it up with the heavy cream.

Add in the carrots and potatoes and bacon bits, stir nicely and add in about 2 cups of the reserved liquid at first, then add in the cheese. stir well here, and add liquid until desired texture achieved. finish off with some salt, pepper, and a dash of jerk on top to finish your winter meal!
>>
>>21227887
No. This isn't our adventure. We want Rebecca to make her own name, we want to listen for tales of Rebecca, not for the Children of the Dancing Knight.
>>
>>21227887
What >>21227438 did. And said.

We're not taking away her adventure or asserting our character over the wondrous journey of someone who's quite dear to us.
>>
>>21227911
In my Image archives.
With the rest of my 4Chan bartering tools.

>>21227920
No meat?
>>
>>21227915
Catch up with Mort, check out his remodeled club, and then go eat dinner with the family.
>>
>>21227914
You filthy bastard, how dare you
Eavesdrop with our magic hearing, just a little.

>>21227920
My mouth is watering already.
>>
>>21227920
That isn't a stew. I don't know what the fuck it is, but it isn't a stew.
>>
>>21227942
Bacon is meat
>>
>>21227914
Who is in their party? Like how we've got our elf rogue, human female witch, and human male paladin, what are the species/classes of her party?
>>
>>21227942
Bits of bacon.
>>
>>21227914
"They grow up so fast."

Just sit at the bar, catch up with Mort, keep an eye on Rebecca and be filled with pride.
>>
>>21227960
sounds pretty tasty though
>>
that's just the basic shell to it. you can add any other meat you like to it. I'd like to see shredded chicken to it for more meat. you can also add celery if that's your thing. chunks of beef work well as well. it's a potato stew base and is easily built on.
>>
>>21227983
>chicken stew
What the FUCK are you doing jesus christ.

>>21227971
Also this.
>>
>>21227988
Chicken does taste good, though.
>>
>>21228004
Well yeah, but in a stew? A stew is for good hearty red meat like venison, lamb and beef. Chicken stew sounds more like a curry.
>>
>>21227961
No where near enough meat. I throw a leg of an animal in when I make stew.


>>21227944
You have a little catch up with Mort.
>"Eh, been busy. You know, the club's gotten popular, had to expand."

You have a little chat with Mort, all while keeping your "ears" trained on the alcove.

>"Some guy bought us these drinks, said he was proud."

>"What did he look like?"
Rebecca asks.

>"Dunno, he had a, um, hat? on."

>"Riiiigght."
Rebecca sips her drink while you leave the building.

>>21227971
Two men and one woman, you there's a dwarf, but they could just be short.

As for classes?
A fighter.
Ranger.
Cleric.
Duelist.
Berserker.

>>21227953
With great enjoyment.

What do you do?
>>
heck, i experiment with all my meals. haven't tried chicken in it yet. that's my next risk. the posted recipe is my last proven recipe. it was a great success.
>>
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>>21227942
Well, this is no time for barter, this is time for you give what's asked and no one gets hurt~

Gavrill elated - when I tried to riddle her on Akinator, they djinn assumed I'm thinking of Yuno. What a cute misunderstanding.
>>
>>21228020
Check on the stew, catch up with stumbles and meryl. wait for everyone to come back for dinner
>>
>>21228020
Go back and check on if anything's caught on fire back in the Kitchen.

>>21228019
Hey, hey, hey.
Curry is delicious too.
See where we're going? Chicken curry stew.
Makes you feel all warm and fuzzy.
>>
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>>21228032
>Not even the Akinator knows what you're talking about

Can't you see how hopeless this is, man?
>>
the recipe shapes up to be a really good stew base, drop in a meat of choice then, it's a suggestion, not a requirement. I built that thing one night cause i was hungry and DAMN did it pay off.
>>
>>21228028
I'm sure it was delicious, but don't call it a stew.

>>Venison stew
-Venison stewing meat (things with lots of fat. Legs/ necks etc)
-Shallots or Onions
-Parsnip
-Carrots
-Potatoes
-Seasoned flour (That's flour with misc seasoning in it. Usually salt, pepper, garlic salt and dried herbs)
-500ml Beef Stock
-500ml Vegetable stock
-???ml Red wine. This is really to taste.
-salt/pepper for seasoning.

1.cut meat into cubes and season with flour then cook in a frying pan with butter or oil until browned.
2.Chop carrots, parsnips and onions into whatever size you want. Usually for stews they're cut nice and chunky.
3. Combine everything in a stewing pot/ casserole dish. Add salt and pepper. (and any other spices you might want)
4.Cook for 2-3 hours at high heat in an oven.
5. Eat with mashed potato and bread for sopping up juice.
>>
Did this just become an Epic Foods thread...?
>>
>>21228104
Don't call it a stew because it didn't have enough meat in it?
MMMMYEAH.

But then again I'm glad that this board is all I'll ever need.
>>
>>21228020

Is Rebecca the Fighter or the Duelist? Also are classes actually a thing in this setting or are they more like generlisations? e.i. armoured melee dude is a fighter, agile melee dude is a duelist, smashy melee dude is a beserker.
>>
>>21228122
She's clearly the dualist. I'd assume the fighter is a standard sword and board kinda guy.
>>
>>21228028
Dammit man, I'm a carnivore. I eat meat, I need meat.

>>21228032
Real shame, motherfucker, but no. It's mine.

>>21228046
You return and check on the stew, your apprentices are all wearing cooking aprons and squabbling.

>"No, it NEEDS cinnamon."
Steve shouts.
>"Fuck off, it needs more salt!"
Gary yells back.
>"You're both wrong, it needsh cabbage. Cabbage ish shuch a good vegetable..."

Everyone stares at SpiderDan.

"You're all wrong. It's perfect. I said stir, not modify."

>"Yes(h) s(h)ir..."
They all give in and stir like good little boys.

You go and check in on Stumbles and Meryl, both of them sitting in the garden on a patio swing.

>"Hello, Daniel, I shee you took Dan on hish firsht adventure, thanksh for that."
Stumbles says, looking out over the gardens.

"No problem. How you been, by the way?"

>"Good, good, Meryl and I have been on our honeymoon. I've gotten pretty popular among the upper clashshesh."

"And Meryl?"

>"I was in a gardening book! My turnips are prize winners!"

"Good, good. Dinner'll be ready soon, come have some."

You return to the kitchen and send the lads out to set the table.

You pick up the big pot and carry it out.

The lads are putting bowls and bread down, and some drinking glasses.

Areal and Erik enter at the smell of food, Stumbles and Meryl follow. Rebecca's last, a bit tipsy.

Everyone sits down and compliments your apprentices for the food.

What do you do?
>>
>>21228122
Classes are just a generalization for you. Rebecca is indeed the duelist.
>>
>>21228115
Because at no point does it "stew." Everything is just cooked. And what kind of dumbass stew has cheese on it anyway.

>>21228113
It's like I'm really on /ck/!

>>21228020
Check on the stew. She seems to have a pretty balanced group and we have prepared her well.
>>
>>21228151
Did we put the coin in the stew?
That was the most importaint part!
>>
>>21228178
No. Coins contain a slight amount of lead. It'd be toxic.
>>
>>21228151

Ask Erik if there's anything necromantic he can do with our dragontooth.
>>
>>21228151
>cinnamon
Steve is now banned from the kitchen forever.

Thank stumbles for training with Rebecca.
Make a toast to her first adventure. Make sure it's really embarrassing for everyone.
>>
call it what you want. It takes 2-3 hours for me to get it just right.
>>
>>21228151
Turn on Avatar form so we can eat dinner.

Make a toast about how proud we are of Rebecca going on her first adventure. Try not to tear up, fail.

Don't tell any stories about our adventures. Not even our first one.
>>
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>>21228151
Ask Meryl how life has been since the Shadow Moses Incident.
>>
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>>21228151
>spoiler
too bad...
>>
>>21228161

I wonder what class we are? Paladin/Berserker/Duelist? (obvious, RAGE and dancing respectfully)

Oh and Lizzyform to eat, but pray to Hydra for this meal first. It's polite!
>>
>>21228170
What. But vegetable stews do stew at some point during the stewing process.
Dunno about the cheese though. Especially not if it melts into a glob and ties everything together, ugh.
>>
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>>21228248
Don't you fucking stop, bro.
>>
the point you add it into is after you've added some reserved liquid in, and you stir it in. it melts into the creamy sauce, and makes it very good. then you add in more reserved liquid for thickness preference.
>>
>>21228206
>"If you had more of it I could reanimate it..."

>>21228212
>He doesn't like cinnamon!
Oh my god you have no taste.

You raise your glass in a toast for Rebecca and her first adventure.

"May Rebecca's nights be warm, her days long, and her foes really stupid!"
You pour the wine into your face and let it spill onto the floor.

>"You're cleaning that up."
Erik says.

>>21228230
You assume champion form, and eat dinner.

Pretty funny, actually, you grow flesh and all you can think to do with it is eat.

>>21228247
>"It's been pretty good, wait, what are you talking about?"
Meryl puts stewy bread into her mouth/hole/thing.

>>21228248
You gonna give it to the guy? I wouldn't. Funnier this way.

You spend the night eating and drinking, and generally being merry.

You say very few actual words, letting the others talk the night away.

Stumbles talks about new business contracts, Meryl her garden, your lads talk about some jobs they're going on.

Areal says her stories aren't for the table.

>"Well, I've been reading some of those books Daniel got from Roland, finally, I know, and I've discovered a way to make doors open themselves. Isn't that neat?"
Erik says from his pocket edition of the Busty Barwenches Vol. XXIIV

What do you do?
>>
>>21228301
>>21228259
>>21228259
Nah man. The vegetables are boiled, the onion sounds like it is fried/ lightly seared. Then it's served with the juice(??) and cheese. Hot cheese and runny liquids is a bad idea unless you're making some kind of sauce which should be made prior to serving.

But how to you stir the cheese into an even sauce while there's chunks of vegetables and stuff in the mix too. Surely it'd be better to make your cheesy, creamy sauce and then add the vegetables to that?
>>
>>21228151
Is it just me, or does anyone else think our apprentices might get a bit jealous we're letting our neice go on her own adventure when we really haven't allowed them to do much but tag along with us?
We should start sending them on small jobs, like bandits or something.
>>
>>21228333
It took you three years to figure out how to make doors open themselves.
And you said you were the most powerful necromancer in the world earlier?
What.
>>
>>21228333
Cinnamon is for sweets, pies and MAYBE roast veg.

."Was there anything else in the book? Perhaps a bit more useful?"
>>
>>21228369
He's the most powerful necromancer LEFT. The bar is very, very low.
>>
>>21228333
Hey Meryl? What ever happened to Snake?
>>
>>21228369

Just goes to show how far the standards have fallen, thanks to our murderous crusades...
>>
>>21228363
nah, we are molding them into top tier fighters , she wants to forge her own path
>>
Rolled 6

>>21228392
Stop that shit.
>>
>>21228256
>>21228230
No, no more squandering the gift of Hydra to partake in earthly and fleeting pleasures!
>>
>>21228333
Really, who the hell puts cinnamon in a stew. cinnamon's for rolls, bread, pie and pancakes.
>>
>>21228333
"... you are a horrible wizard. Do you ever do anything other than read smut?"
>>
>>21228363
Dude.
We didn't even know she was out to go adventuring.

But these fellows here are our APPRENTICES. And some damn good fighters, too.
And with them we can go and FIGHT STUFF while destroying those magicians foolish enough to make themselves known.

It's not really the same as going out to protect a shipment or something like that, which adventurers start their adventuring with.

And in any case, they're probably dealing with giant rats and the sort if there's a need for it. They've certainly got the capability.
>>
>>21228333

When everyone is sharing stories make like Areal and say your stories are inappropiate as well.
>>
the steps is:
boil and cook the veggies
prep the onions
add flour, cream, and some spices
add veggies and bacon
STIR THAT SHIT
add some reserved liquid, about 2-3 cups
add cheese and stir it in
and then add more liquid to get it to thickness desired
>>
>>21228333
contemplate how we are allowing rebecca go out on her own, but we still dont trust our lads, hmmm
starting tomorrow, set up a stall and training ground in the town, see if anyone else wishes to be trained, lets create a fighting force for the town , and learning other core skills like climbing, what is edible flora , etc..
>>
>>21228333
Ask everyone how they like the soup. Let a dramatic silence build up after everyone voices their opinions and then tell them you cooked it.
>>
>>21228363
One's a farmer, the other's a merchants son. The third is three years old.

They know Rebecca is related to you, but they are going out as a group soon. They've got to see the world too.

>>21228392
>"Double-triple-turn-cross. Meaning I don't know what you're on about."

>>21228369
>"Yes. A corpse once knew life, a door didn't. Very different."

>>21228414
>>21228374
It seems I'm the only man left with the gift of taste.

>>21228420
>"Of course not, I read fantasy novels, too.

">>21228424
>"WE KNOW!"
Everyone at the table shouts at you.

Well... Maybe you SHOULD tell some stories...

What do you do?
>>
>>21228409
Hydra is cool with it, we talked about this.
>>
>>21228363
They are npcs, she's a pc of her clique. They understand.
>>
>>21228300
see for yourself
rule34 -> Yuno_Gasai

>>21228333
Funnier that way.
>>
>>21228396
>>21228420

Read the earlier threads. Good grief.

But in the end, we really know VERY LITTLE about Erik.
All we know about him is something he could have just willingly revealed to us, which is still very little.
Also, this is even more worrying when you think about how he has the training of an illusionist.
We can't know what he's hiding. And we have no proof that he is hiding anything.

Then again we have no need to worry. We're his servant, aren't we?
And if anything, we'll make our master the mightiest magician in the end.
>>
>>21228458
Tell a story about something funny that happened in a bar.
>>
>>21228479
And then we find out he isn't really a lich and he just uses illusion to make us think he is. And to make us think we're a skeleton. In reality we're a peasant he kidnapped.
>>
>>21228458
>fantasy novels too
Oh god, Erik is a fa/tg/uy, isn't he. He's all porn, books and stupid uses of magic.
When will we start working on deep rot. I MUST KNOW.
>>
>>21228458
Don't tell any stories. Instead start singing, get everyone else to join in.
>>
>>21228458
Tell a story all about how my life got flipped turn upside down.
>>
>>21228458
Tell them of how you prepared for your first adventure. Focus on not going full on vietnam war vet mode. We can do this. We went to therapy.
>>
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>>21228477
You are a terrible person.
It's always more special when you find it on /tg/
>>
>>21228523
>>21228518
You guys. I love you.
Just thought you should know.
I'll get back in the box now.
>>
>>21228458

"Oh yeah? Well I do have an appropiate story! Once upon a time there was a necromancer called Morty, I talked him out of being a baddie and now he lives happily ever after as a bartender!"
>>
>>21228506
But we escape the lich! Become an adventurer and defeat the lich with thanks to our experience in wielding the cat!
Fall in love with an elven broad, have ourselves a child and retire, finally as an old master catsman.
>>
>>21228479
Makes you think, doesn't it? What if he implanted the idea to kill off his opposition, what if he just makes you want to do what you're doing? Compared to everyone else in these threads, you've known Erik the longest, but know almost nothing about him.

Areal did say this house holds an extreamly bloody past.

Or not.

Maybe.

>>21228508
Deep rot?


You decide to tell funny stories instead of the darker ones you're used to.

Like how you missed shots with your bow and inadvertently made a way to Beric, or how you infiltrated Mort's crypt through song and dance.

People laugh at the second one.

>>21228531
That story isn't pretty.

>>21228523
That one, however, is.

"So I'm dead, right? Then boom, Erik's standing over me saying 'Come along old chap, it's time to get up' but I don't get up and he has to blast my ass out of my grave. Oh man, that was so long ago, well, a long time for you lot."

The night goes on, everyone has a good time.

What do you do?
>>
>>21228556
No. We're not acting like an idiot at the table.
>>
>>21228570
Deep Rot was a massive computer made out of skeletons. Shit got crazy, especialy once we worked out an internet made of pain to connect with.
>>
>>21228570
Deep Rot
http://1d4chan.org/wiki/Deep_Rot
>>
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>>21228533
Gee, chill, man, have a catboy...
>>
>>21228570
Skeleton logic gates.
In a pocket dimension.
A lot of them.
Computing.

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/12936417/

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/12939196/
>>
>>21228608
>>21228609
>>21228642
Oh that.
>>
>>21228570
How was the stew?
And if it was any good we might as well commend the boys on a stew well made.
>>
>>21228570
Find Rebecca. Give her a hug against any objections she may have.

"I'll miss you, stay safe, don't make the mistakes I made. Come back and tell me the stories of your adventure, but most importantly come back.

I know I'm not a good person, but I at least want to try and be a good uncle. I love you Rebecca, I always want you to know that."

Tear up some.
>>
>>21228570
So.....where is the food we eat going after we come out of hydra form?
>>
>>21228622
>okita
I am placated.
For now.
>>
>>21228570
"So rebecca, is my cooking really all that bad?"
>>
>>21228694


Sweet, because we are still in Hydra Form we can actually cry!
>>
>>21228678
>"'S pretty good, could doe with less venison... But good all the same."
Areal says.

>"I like it"
>"Same."
>"Foooood."
Your apprentices sound off.

Stumbles and Meryl's faces are full, so they can't speak.

>"It's good, Uncle, but I could do better."
She's found you out.

>>21228698
On the floor. Duh.
But really, same place your skin goes.

>>21228694
>"Uncle, people are watching... Get off of me!"
"Mmm... No."
>"You're getting those crocodile tears on me dammit."
"Deal with it."


Mid hug Hydra form recedes. You sit down at your seat once more and let everyone finish their food.

What do you do?
>>
>>21228570
Bid goodnight to everybody. Especially Rebecca.
We need to prepare for our next target. I suggest intelligence gathering. So, buy a long, dark, mysterious-stranger robe, sail to far away lands and spend the following months buying drinks for strangers, giving small quests to adventurers, learning what ills the land and who is the next target. Keep a low profile, resort to violence only if you must. Mask your presence(leave your artifacts at home, carry only coin, clothes and a small dagger), learn. Then strike.
>>
>>21228736
>crocodile tears
"I knew you had a sense of humor."
>>
>>21228736
Roll our eyes at Areal for that doe pun.

"Heh, crocodile tears. I've got to remember that one."
>>
>>21228736
well, ill leave you too your meal, lads, dont forget, up early in the morning , i have a job for you
during the night, make loads of wooden swords,shield,javelins,clubs,helmets and arm guards
crudely put together a stall, we are gonna get more apprentices, and have our current ones train their own, multiply the towns fighting numbers
>>
>>21228741
Why don't we just carry useable weapons in our chest cavity?
>>
>>21228779
But our form's receded already-- I don't-- Wha-- Whuh?
>>
>>21228752
>"No, it means they're empty."

>>21228779
>"How did you roll you-never mind, I don't care."
Areal finishes her stew and downs her drink.

>>21228741
Something like this is going to need general consensus.

>>21228798
"I've got jobs for you, be up early."

What do you do?
>>
>>21228799
WE USED TO HAVE BEES THERE.
WHERE ARE OUR BEES.
>>
>>21228736

So Eric. Got any books that'll help me write better? I have trouble with those pesky letters, especially the ones called "Whys".
>>
>>21228814
>Lava
>>
>>21228814
replenishing their numbers if i remember correctly
>>
>>21228814
In our room. The place is a fucking mess
>>
>>21228824
DAMN YOU, UMBRA!
THOSE BEES HAD BEEN THROUGH JUST AS MUCH AS WE HAD!
>>
>>21228833
>>21228827
OH OKAY.
Disregard this, >>21228835, for I suck cocks.
And to be honest, I think they may have made a nest in the sockdrawer there.
Hum. I wonder how fast bees multiply.
>>
>>21228811
I'm all for reconnaissance. Anything to stop another fiasco like the volcano.
>>
>>21228852
I wonder how fast they multiply in 3 years, and what that hellish buzzing sound is
>>
>>21228799
I meant for us to travel light, but such restrictions hardly apply to a construct that draws strength from it's will. Still, the hammer is a rather messy tool, easily identifiable to boot. As for the Siege Bow, few people can carry one, much less fire it.

Perhaps tomorrow we could ask Morty or Erik about next targets. But right now, we are gathering far too much attention. If we keep this up, Wizards will start to prepare for us. And you don't want a wizard to be prepared, oh no you don't.
>>
>>21228811
Either ask Rebecca where her brother and mother were buried, or just go to the cemetery to find them.
We'll find them.
We have all the time for ourselves.

And why? Because they were distant kin.
And it wouldn't be right to not to remember them even a little afterwards.
>>
A sudden, horrifying realization hits you. You leave the table and go to the wing where you bunked up.

The door to the north wing is shut, and you have to kick it in.

The entire hallway is covered in hive combs, and coated in honey. You march through the comb floor, crushing your way along.

The door to your room is covered in hornbees, a living mess. They'd of attacked anyone else by now, but they remember their contract with you.

You push the door open.

>"Greeetingzzz Daniel...."
The queen says, while pumping out eggs.

She's a big girl, a foot long, and on your bed.

Dear god.

"Uh, what?"

>"Weeee have uzzed your room azzzz a hive. We hope you don't mind."

Holy shit, they're fucking everywhere.

What do you do?
>>
>>21228900
After she leaves we'll ask Stumbles. Who do you think has been raising her this whole time?
>>
>>21228921
"Um. Hi. Gonna have to find you a new place for a hive, Erik's going to be pissed when he finds out about this."
>>
>>21228921
"I don't really mind. It's not like I ever sleep.

How've you been doing lately?"
>>
>>21228921
hey, hmmm
there is rather a lot of you now
well, the usual, a few dozen to fill my chest cavity, and a few jars of honey
>>
>>21228921
Shrug.
Go and do something completely different.
>>
>>21228921
I wonder if there's enough bees to lift us up. It would be so bitchin to fly around on a swarm of undead bees.
>>
>>21228921
PURGE THE XENOS.
>>
>>21228921
Oh lord what the fuck.
>>
>>21228921

You know we could probably let her have Beric's castle...
>>
>>21228921

>pumping out eggs

Suffer traumatic Meryl related flashbacks.
>>
>>21228984
PERFECT. Minimal risk of them attacking anyone too.
>>
>>21228984
thats genius
tell her about berics castle, and how its near unlimited space would be better than this room, but to still not to sting humans unless they are expressingly trying to kill you
>>
>>21228951
Do you really
think that Erik
will actually mind
a few million bees occupying a room he's probably never seen, most likely, in over three years?
>>
>>21229021
What if someone decides to clean it? Or they decide to expand further? They've taken the entire wing.
>>
>>21228951
>"The Liiich knowzzz about uzz..."

"Roight."

>>21228966
>"The hive growzz all day. We thank you for the draw of sockzzz."

>>21228971
>"Naturally."
A swarm of warrior hornbees fills your chest cavity.

>"Feel free to take some honey."

>>21228976
Logistical nightmare.

>>21228984
>"Weee will take thizz castle. Yes. Sooon."

The hornbees begin preparing the young for transport.

>"Don't stand on anyone on the way out."

"No problem..."

>>21228998
You have a flash back of squeezing Meryl's thorax, scream, and run from the north wing.

What do you do?
>>
>>21228921
go tell erik about the bees and ask him what we should do
>>
>>21229034
Well yes, they'll probably care.

But Erik's the last person that will mind.
Unless if his Library gets hit.
>>
>>21229060
Strip naked and jump in the fountain again. Continue screaming. Bonus points if areal sees it, she wasn't there the first time.
>>
>>21229060

Bubblebath. Clean those memories away!
>>
>>21229075
I can personally tell you that if Erik's library got damaged, it would take every other Magic user and Champion to stop him on his revenge war.

>>21229085
Areal walks to the window of her room to look over the town and scenery.

Then sees you jump into the fountains, screaming, with a chest full of bees.

She closes the curtains without blinking and goes to bed.

What do you do?
>>
>>21229060
Clean and nice and shiny and scrubbed and NOT REMEMBERING NOT REMEMBERING
>>
>>21229060
Dry heaves, dispite the lack of throat muscles.
>>
>>21229085
>>21229099
Politely ask the bees to leave you alone for a moment before, though.

So, what is it going to be? Gather Intelligence and remain unseen, or train our guys and prepare a small militia force?
>>
>>21229107
The night's still young!
Go check on the Cemetery.

Or don't. If someone has a brilliant plan for the sake of our future.
>>
>>21229107
clean, gather hornbees
get some tools and wood, and start making these supplies for the stall/school
>>
>>21229107
Does that mean Eric is actually a extremely competent opponent or is he just really really mad
>>
>>21229146

Probably both, mostly the latter though. He loves his porn.
>>
>>21229136

Can we pull off the stealthy portian? We are 6.6 and skeletal and in/famous.

Also if we wrap up in a black cloak we are so using a scythe as our main weapon.
>>
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>>21229137
>>
>>21229146
It means you've only seen Erik in his apathetic state, he cares for one thing in this world, his books.

Erik, if mad, is a force to be reckoned with. And the only person capable of stopping him is under his command.

In short, if Erik wanted to, he could raise an undead army in a few hours. He's been busy while you were away.

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/21225612/
Archived.
G'night ladies.
>>
>>21229207
Yes.
YES.
YYYEEEEEESSSSSSS!
This has got to happen at some point.
Although it should be an actual warscythe. A farmers scythe isn't much good as a weapon.
>>
>>21229240
Night story man, thanks for the thread!
>>
Night OP. Also we should wreck his library and say the other mages did it. What's the worst that could happen?
>>
>>21229365
Global Thermomagical War.

It's well known that magicals want to be the best, so it makes you wonder why none have come for Erik, even when he's shown how potent he can be. Example. You.
>>
>>21229365
NO YOU FOOL
>>
>>21229365
No, bad idea.

>>21229240
It's a good thing he's a lazy sod. He's the only really powerful wizard we've met who hasn't gone completely bonkers and needed to die.
>>
>>21229389
Does he have control of us while we're in hydra form?
>>
>>21229463
Yep. Even if he didn't, unless you could break his phylactery, he'd come back and wonder what's come over you all of a sudden.
>>
>>21229478
I thought we weren't undead while in hydra form? Now I wonder what we're going to do if the shit hits the fan and he goes bugfuck crazy
>>
>>21229531
Run far or die.

Erik still has command of your soul. Even when you're in Hydra form.
>>
>>21229207
Yes, I see your point. The face and the bony hands could be disguised with scarves and poor lighting. Perhaps there are magical charms that could help. The real trouble would be stature(which we need to disguise, a 6.6 hobo is easily recognizable). I can think of a few ways, none of them pleasant.

-Try posturing to reduce your apparent height. When stationary, this is perfect, this thigh slanted a bit sideways, your shoulder joints a bit further away from your neck. There are many little tricks that can do this, none of them taxing on our skeletal structure. The obvious downside comes when we have to move. It would look awkward at best. Careful dancing would be required there. Perhaps walking with a cane and pretending to be a hunchback could help here.

-Grow the fleshy bits with Hydra's influence. The easiest, but also the most inefficient and dangerous(for them). Some people would lynch us with that appearance. Terrible at playing incognito too.

-Replace some bones in our body with parts from smaller skeletons. Can this even be done? could we go back to our old body? Would our abilities be affected?

Of course, those pesky elves and their aura detecting abilities would have to be maneuvered around.
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>>21229549
Perhaps, we could contract adventuring parties to do the scouting for us while we plot behind the curtains. A few coins of gold can purchase the lips of most innkeepers and bartenders. We don't even have to deal with the adventurers ourselves, there would be couriers for that. Of course, a chain is only as strong as it's weakest link, proper screening would be required.


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