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ITT: Kid Shows of the Imperium

I'll start with DORA THE ROGUE TRADER
>>
Inquisitor Time with Flynn and Drake
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I.G. Joe anyone?
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Bilius Nye the Mechanicus Guy
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Spongebob Commissarpants.
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My little Marines.
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My Little Sororitas: Burning is Purging
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The Ultramarine Squad Show
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My life as a teenaged Servitor.
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Adeptus Astartes: Terra's Mightiest Heroes
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>>21308661
>Not Explorator
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>>21308717
YES
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Dexter's Lab would feature a diminutive Techpriest whose laboratory constantly gets trashed by a dickish Eldar wench.
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Ultramon
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>>21308729
But woudn't that be HERESY?

Eldar. Winning?
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Tau Titans.
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>mfw in the 40k universe there probably is a cartoon show about Commissar Cain foiling Failbaddon on a weekly basis
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Magos Gadget

And his apprentice Penny and trusty Servo-Skull, Brain
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>>21308743
Tau don't have titans!
Tau don't even think titans exist!
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>>21308743
HERESY
>>
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Captain Planetfall, of course
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>>21308746

Why the fuck would it be Cain and not Creed?
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>>21308758
Cain is more marketable.
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>>21308758
Because Creed is too good at hiding the media don't know who he is, duh
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Sister Possible.
A sororitas who inexplicably keeps teaming up with an I.G.
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not a kids show but

Parks and Administratum
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Neon Genesis Imperatorum
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>>21308769

>the media don't know who he is

The Lord Castellan of one of the most important planets of the Imperium? Famed Imperium wide?

Yeah...nah...
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Explorator Rex
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>>21308693
>>21308702
>>21308669
>>21308736
>>21308746
>The Average imperial citizens.
>Even knowing about these organiations.
>>
During the Crusade

Curze the Animated Series.
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>>21308789

I'd assume they know what Commissars are, and the existence of space marines in general, and the inquisition in general. Nothing specific though.
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>>21308789
Cain is popular in-universe, you know.

Has shows based on him and everything
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>>21308751
Oh Jesus, I would watch this.
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>>21308798
Even knowing about the existence of chaos is considered grounds for execution for the average imperial citizen.
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TITAN XLR
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The late night Slaaneshi cult show

Only available when you switch to HereitcTV
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>>21308807
Again, Cain is popular in-universe and has TV shows based on him.
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>>21308807
that actually differs planet to planet.

i have a feeling the average Cadian citizen has some knowledge of Chaos.
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>>21308808
HELL. FUCKING. YES.
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>>21308798
no. no one knows the inquisition is a thing. even most criminals are skeptical of it.
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>>21308746
>Abaddon is based off of Snidely Whiplash, with a daemonicly possessed mustache that plays Muttley.
>>
>>21308807
I always thought that was more of a "worst kept secret in the universe" kind of gig.

Everyone knows chaos exists but the inquisition decides that they shouldn't, so letting on that you know is gonna get you fucked up.
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>>21308824
But they know what Commissars are and stories have shown popular propaganda/shows in-universe for them.

And you said they didn't know about those.

Who do I believe? You? Or the fucking books?
>>
I always thought imperial kids tv would be like arab kids tv:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-pOBvFhAHbc

but more extreme, and with commissars.
>>
film edition

Xenos vs Heretics
Whoever wins, we purge
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>>21308751
The show was canceled and the creators purged after the sheer number of Adept Penny porn invariably gave rise to Slaaneshi Cultists.
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>>21308836
they know about commissars and shit, yeah. i mean specifically the inquisition. They don't know about that.
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>>21308807

Yes, but that's chaos. I didn't say chaos.

Imperial citizens know what Commissars are... they're essentially spiritual officers attached to Guard regiments.

Space Marines are known about everywhere. Sometimes only in myth, but still, everywhere they're known in general as enigmatic defenders of mankind.

And the Inquisition is known about on a general level as an institution. People don't know about grey knights or chaos or the true nature of the warp or any such thing, but Inquisitorial inquiries are a real thing and can involve anyone, literally Anyone can be called to stand trial in front of a tribune, sometimes merely to offer evidence. People know of the Inquisition in the general sense of an investigative body.
>>
>Implying the Imperial Television consists of anything but Ecclesiarchy TV.
> NOW DONATE 500 BUCKS OR U GONNA GET PURGED!
>Further implying that most imperial citizens have enough money to buy a TV and enough time to actually watch the shows, rather than working themselves to death.
>>
>>21308848
Of course there's at least some knowledge of them, otherwise noone would shit their pants in fear when they seen an Inquisitor. The average guy doesn't know what they do, of course, just that they'll shoot the shit out of you if you don't do exactly as they say.
>>
>>21308848
Zemelda, a teenage imperial citizen, in the Cain books knew about Inquisotors.

There's also the popular myth of Inquisitors disguising themselves as Rogue Traders.
>>
kids shows in the imperium are probably mostly instructional vidieos of how to work in in the mines.
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>>21308830
>>21308815

>Slowly Jaq said: ‘I have a terrible secret to confide, my Lord. In the warp be it known there exist powerful daemons of Chaos. Chaos is the contradiction of all sanity and civilization, and of reality itself. These daemons can enter reality if they are invited by corrupt fools. The name of one vile Chaos god is Slaanesh. I regret to say there are worshippers of Slaanesh on your own world—’ And all of these words comprised an order of execution for all those who heard them in this luxurious room – as Meh’lindi well knew. - Inquisition War
>>
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>>21308661

Daemon Station

Chat with the sexiest Daemonettes 24/7

Viewing may result in visit but Inquisition.
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>>21308837
I'd at least hope that in the year 40,000 the production quality would be a bit better
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>>21308861

This. People know Of an Inquisition just enough so that when an Inquisitor flashes his or her seal and says 'Hey listen up chuclefucks I'm from the Inquisition' they know to shut up and obey.
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>>21308867

Inquisition War is largely 1st Edition Canon and really just a fapfiction about Meh'lindi
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Inquisition League NOW!
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>>21308870

Oh wait... kids show.

Hmm.

Well kids need to learn sometime.
>>
kids shows in the imperium are mostly educational shows about working in the mines.
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>>21308891
>To catch a Cultist
"Sit down a moment. So, what have you been watching lately?"
>>
Whatever Happened to Magos Jones
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>>21308898
Yeah, read it the first time.

Shut up.
>>
Where in the Imperium is Rouge Trader Sandiago?
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Totally Sororitas!
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Samurai Draigo

>Long ago on a distant planet, I, M'kar, the shape-shifting Master of Darkness, unleashed an unspeakable evil! But a foolish Grey Knight warrior wielding a magic sword stepped forth to oppose me. Before the final blow was struck, I tore open a portal in time and flung him into the warp, where my evil is law! Now the fool seeks to return to the past, and undo the future that is M'kar!
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>>21308921
Oh, God-Emperor... you bastard.
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>>21308729
>>21308709
>>21308691

Das Bestus
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>>21308904

Uhh.. Fifty ways to better serve the Emperor?

It's my favourite show, honest.

--------------

Also I don't suppose anyone has or could edit a version of that pic with him made to look like an inquisitor?
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>How I met your Living Saint
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Ciaphas Cain: The Brave and the Bold
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>>21308922
>>
Mystery Imperium Theater 40,000
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>>21308922

But unlike Draigo Jack can actually cut through a 2+ save.
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The Smurfs

A show about the Ultramarines :v
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The Golden Throne Theory

>3 Custodian Guards are forced to deal with what they have and haven't been told about the emprah when a Farseer begins making calls through the webway underneath the throne
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>>21308870

Oh for the love of god!

>Viewing may result in visit but Inquisition.
>but

I obviously meant by. How the hell did I make that mistake?

Perhaps the warp dust's getting to me.
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>>21308964
HERESY
>>
The Real Adventures of Jonathan Questus
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Psyk?

>The son of an inquisitor blessed with the ability to piece together heretical crimes must pass himself off as a psyker lest the arbites think he is a heretic himself
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Orkboy Bebop
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Rolled 20

Titan XLR

A Titanicus transport crashes on a barely civilized planet near the Eye of Terror. Koop, a man blessed by the omnissiah with supreme technical skills, repairs it and uses it to fight off invaders and trash the local administratum offices on a weekly basis.
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How to Drive Your Chimera
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>>21308989

Already suggested:

>>21308808
>>
>>21308984
I'd watch it.
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The GRIMDARK Adventures of Billy and Mandy
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This Old Hive.
Cooking with Flamers.
AdMech Stars.
Ultimate Imperium Ninja Warrior
The I Files.
Giligan's Feral World.
The Andy Griffith Show, following the day-to-day missadventures of a well-meaning but clumsy small-town Arbites.
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>>21309024
>mfw nothing in the show actualy changes.
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>>21309024
Show canceled and creator purge because of the similarity of Grim to a Necron
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Rolled 8

Curze beyond
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That's So Raven

About the titular psyker who gets flashes of the future
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>>21309056
You suck
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>>21309043

How about have Grim as a Death Spectres marine instead?
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The Psykers of Waverly Place
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>>21309064
Show canceled and creator purged for blasphemous portrayal of one of the Emperor's Angels of Death
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Phineas and Ferbus, following a pair of your Mechanicus Adepts
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The God-Emperor's New Groove
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Catachan Devil Hunter
A nature show hosted by Stephanos Irwin that visits a new planet every month and educates people about the biodiversity of the imperium's fauna.

the host wrestles some incredibly dangerous animal once an episode
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>Purge Mandate

>An Inquisitor is falsely accused of Heresy and black listed by Arbites, Assassins and other Inquisitors. He must attempt to find out what happened to him while dodging everyone who seems to have their own agenda....
>>
>>21309084
Yes.
YES.
I want to see a funky God-Emperor so bad.
>>
I guess Warpscape and Warpgate WG-1 would too heretical...

Warp Trek would be unrecognizable.
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>>21309084
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>>21309138
>>
>>21309136
>Warp Trek would be unrecognizable.
The prime directive would be a little different.
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The Commissar Fuklaw Show

In the Imperium's Cartoon Network counterpart's version of Adult Swim
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>>21309157
It consists of this image for a half hour straight, and if you ever get up or change the chanel, he punches you though the TV.
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Exterminatus Now: The Animated Series
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Angry Marine Power Hour.

or something...
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Schola Progenium Musical
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Girls und Baneblade
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You guys are lucky. When I was a juvie back in the Britanicus cluster, all we got was orkish vids on the airwaves.

I still remember Bitza's opening music.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rfyp5JVrKBo
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I am Adam. Prince of Cadia and defender of the secrets of The Imperium. This is 1313th 'Cringer'... my fearless regiment. Fabulous secret powers were revealed to me the day I held aloft my power hammer and said... By the power of Golden Throne!
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>>21309255
I have the Power! Cringer became the Mighty Legio Secundus, and I became Sigmar the Lost Primarch and the most powerful man in the universe. Only a few others share this secret... Our friends: The Emperor, Lord Castellan and Draigo. Together we defend The Cadian Gate from the evil forces of Abaddon.
>>
Da fresh Warboss of Ultima Segmentus.

Yo diz iz a story all'bout how...
(and i can't into making a Ork version of this)
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>>21309255

>I am Adam. Prince of Cadia

Claiming lordship over a world belonging to the God Emperor.

>Fabulous secret powers were revealed to me

Clearly consorting with the ruinous powers.

> I held aloft my power hammer

Taking the Emperor's holy powerhammer from it's rightful owners, the Adeptus Astartes.

Heresy.
>>
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Cadian Wars
A cartoon based on the many, many wars that have ravaged the area of space around cadia. The shows follows the 501st cadian as they defend the imperium from vile xenos, heretical cults, and forbidden archeotech.
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>>21308669
>>
The fresh prince of Cadia
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>>21309312
>>
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PURGE-ON!
A cartoon following the various adventures of five Schola Progrenium girls as they make their way from lowly orphans to fully-fledged Bolter Bitches.
Lots of cake, prayers and semi-lesbian antics included.
I'm so sorry.
>>
Cogzzy and Drix

The adventures of Cognitator Jones and his partner Drix within the body of Adept Hektor. They fight to keep Hektor's digital mindscape safe from the predations of murderous machine spirits and digital daemons.
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The Trails of Brother-Captain Donald Duck
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>>21309344
I'd watch that. I'd watch that so hard! (pun intended)
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>>21309344
10/10, would watch
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>>21309358
you mean TRIALS
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>>21309358
That was epic.
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>>21309344
Must be made into a fan webcomic
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>>21309344
> Fun things are fun!
>>
Courage the Cowardly Necron
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>>21309358
Oh shit YES
>>
>>21309391
> B-but Elvira-chan, aren't fun things heretical?

>>21309387
Yes please.
>>
Sym-Bionic Titan

The Titan, of course, being a 40K Titan
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>>21309424
Starring brrody, rebelious Catachan Lance; Daughter of a noble Illana; and the Servitor Octus
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I.N.C.I.S.

Imperial Navy Commissariat Investigation Service
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Imperial Comics: The Life and Times of Scrooge Macragge
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>>21309461
You should photoshop commisar hats on them
>>
Somebody wanna archive this?
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How to train your Carnifex
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> you will never watch PURGE-ON!! after a long day slaving away in a factory
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>>21309479
oh look it's the "work in the mines" moron again

it wasn't clever the first time, and it's still not clever now
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>>21309489
Not even the same guy.
Was referring to >>21309344
>>
Recess

Follows a group of six kids in a Schola Progenium
>>
Blackadder
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>>21309512
"B-but, TJ. Isn't that heretical?"
>>
Buzz Lightyear of Segmentum Command
>>
How I Met Your Mother.
Only that everyone is an imperial officer of some kind.
Comissar is best girl, haters gonna hate.
>>
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>>21309520
>>
>>21308758
Because Cain is marketed across the Imperium as an action star.
>>
>Ecclesiastical Planet
>Nothing but Church TV 24/7
>>
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Lamb-Chop's Purge-along

...I feel so old...
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I hope you get the damned reference. I don't know if this series was popular in America but it sure was in Christian Philippines. This cartoon was fucking Christian propaganda, I swear

The Flying Hab.

Three children stumble upon a strange hab of a Mechanicus Magos and his faithful servitor and accidentally set off a Time-warp. They aretransported back to the events of the Horus Heresy and have fun adventures with religious figures such as the saints, the primarchs, and even the Emperor himself as they battle the evil of Horus!
>>
>>21309531
"To infinity and beyond" would make one hell of a badass chapter motto
>>
>>21309550
See >>21309552
>>
>>21309552
The series ends when they return to their time and get purged by the Inquisition.
>>
>>21309551
Heck yes. Charlie Horse the Arch-Militant.
>>
>>21309563
>The series ends when they return to their time and get purged by the Inquisition.
Nonono, they set out with the entire Ordo Chronos and travel to the end of time to fight alongside emps in the last battle.
That's why thy disappeared.
>>
Titan Toppa Emperor Lagann

A show about Emperor abiding citizens, a Mechanicus Magos, a Titan and their struggle against the Tau oppression

Or something like that
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>>21309552
I get it, don't worr. My preschool was run by pastors and they showed us The Flying House. Pretty weird for Japanese to make an Anime of Christianity, seeing it from hindsight. You've awoken long repressed memories in me, Anon.

Pic related, Anime Jesus ffs...
>>
>>21309579
Tau = Beastmen because they have no (significant) Warp presence.
Makes sense.

It'd work better with Orkz though.
>>
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Xeno's Adventure
>>
Super Titan Mechanicus Team Hyperforce GO!
>>
Corsairs of the Koronus Expanse
Lawrence of Tallarn
Strike Psykers

But we have been neglecting games.

Command & Conquer: Gamma Alert
Company of Guards
Xenosiders
Imperium Total War
Assassin: Codename XLVII
Imperial Cause
Purging Floor
Vindicare Elite
>>
>>21309621
Promptly cancelled by the Inquisition and everyone involved in it get executed on the spot
>>
Some sort of 'teenage mutant ninja turtles' analog starring the raven guard?

Borias the techpreist (bob the builder)
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>>21309631
>games

not kids show
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>>21309632
Oh no!

Even in the grimdarkness of the far-distant future, CN still cancels good shows!
>>
>>21309631
Puella Heretikadora Heretica.

All the GRIMDARK and "life ruined by te contract" stuff is already present
Just replace Kyubey with the Ruinous Powers.
>>
LazyHive

Cancelled because the pink-haired schola girl inspired so much fapping it summoned Slaaneshi daemonettes
>>
Mr. Roger's Underhive
>>
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>>21309563
Dunno, The Flying House ended when the kids tried to save Jesus from Crucifixion and ended up witnessing the whole damn thing. And then they were depressed for three episodes and returned back in modern times changed by the experience.

Maybe the kids of Flying Hab attempt to save the Emperor but end up witnessing his sacrifice in the Battle of Terra and end up being changed by the experience.
>>
the standard
Rambork
Orky Balboa
starring Kilbustah SteelStone
>>
>>21309673
On Imperium TV?

HERESY
>>
>>21309673
>Rambork
>Not Sly Marbo
>>
Non-children's shows:

Band of battle-brothers: Follow a squad of Astartes as they fight the renegade Astral Claws in the Badab War.

"The Orlocs" A family of modern gangsters in the hives of Necromunda.

"A Game of Hives"
>>
Clifford the Big Red Grox
>>
>>21309665
>>21309605

You watched shows like THAT as children? You're probably the only ones that know how living in the Imperium feels like
>>
Sesame Hive
>>
>>21308824
>confirmed for having not read the Eisenhorn and Ravenor trilogies
>>
Arbites

whatcha gonna do whatcha gonna do when they come for you
>>
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>>21309728
>Oscar the Grouch is a tyranid
>>
Anyone ever seen clips of North Korean kids shows? Just replace the US with Chaos and Japan with miscellaneous Xenos and boom, Imperium TV. No other changes needed.

Here's a glimpse into the insanity:
http://www.cracked.com/article_19329_the-5-craziest-childrens-cartoons-from-north-korea.html
>>
Too many mutants and/or xenos.
>>
>>21308967
The butt inquisition? Those guys are assholes.
>>
Strike Sisters
>>
>>21309735
Abnett fluff always needs to be taken with a grain of salt. He's good, really, really good, he has ZERO respect for established canon. He just writes whatever the hell he wants to write, and it always gets published because despite (because of?) raging literary douchebaggery it's almost always good.
>>
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>>21309750

>not Cookie Monster
>devouring all cookie biomass in the system
>>
>>21309779
>Bert : eldar
>Ernie : dark eldar
>>
>>21309769
Other books by other authors also mention regular people knowing about the Inquisition.

The claim being ddressed by the example was that civilians don't even know it's name, which is bullshit
>>
The Mysterious Forge Worlds of Gold
>>
Elmo is a khorne berserker. Just replace the tickles and laughs with ranting about the blood god.

Big bird is a kroot.
>>
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>>21309552
Lol Southeast Asian detected, we more or less got the same cartoons regionwide

Doraemus

Weakass nerdy kid Nobita living in Hive Tochaeo in the Nihon sector gets heretical help from his uncle from the Tau Empire, who sends a feline tau-drone named Doraemus. Despite Doraemus' high tech tools and sound advice, nerdy Nobita still fails in his life. The series is geared to teach the folly of listening to whatever Xenos and traitors have to say.
>>
Brother-Captain Scarlet
>>
>>21309836
animated with Space Marine puppets and remote control Rhino toys?

FUCK YES
>>
>>21309836
Gerry Anderson Space Marine series?

Genius.
>>
>>21309836

And in that vein,

The ThunderHawks
>>
The S-Team

P.E Baracus played by a Salamander of course
>>
>>21308779
You are obviously thinking about Neon Genesis Xenos, you know. The show that goes in depth about how puny and unstable the spirits of those who pilot wraithlords are.
>>
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>>21308931

Nevermind
>>
Webway WG-1
No, it's about the times Emps still tried to use it, don't worry.

Sanguinius can be O'Neil
>>
>>21309633
Can we fix it?

No it's tech heresy.
>>
Sheep in the Big Hiveworld

With the memorable antagonists Lord General Specific, Guard Private Public, and the Mad Tech-pri---

"I am not being mad tech-priest! I am angry! ANGRY TECH-PRIEST!"
>>
>>21308963
>:v

Vasco, pls go.

Sage for no contributions.
>>
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Magos Wierd and Servitor Steve
>>
Inquisitor House
>>
>50 Shades of Grey.
A practical cooking show.

>Inquisitor Who?
Pretty much the same but the script is by Dan Abnett.

>Breaking Bad Guys
An Arbites buddy-cop thing.
>>
>>21309631
>Assassin: Codename XLVII
>VIndicare Elite

Fuck, I would play those.

And while we're breaking the rules.

The [REDACTED] Trilogy.

Agent [REDACTED] wakes up stranded on the shore of a planet, he knows not who he is apart from the synskin on his body and the rifle in his hands. While piecing the information he must survive those out to get him, both former employees and recently made enemies using his Assassinorum granted skills.
>>
Ned's Declassified Schola Survivial Guide
>>
>>21309098
>JUST YOU WATCH! I'M GONNA SHOVE MY FIST UP THIS CATACHAN DEVIL'S BUMHOLE!
>>
I-Carly

"I," of course, meaning Inquisitor
>>
Are You Afraid of the Warp?
>>
My Little Sister Can't Be This Heretical
>>
>>21309961
-][- Carly?
>>
>>21310037
YES
>>
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>>21309769
If nobody knew about the Inquisition there wouldn't be any reason to, well -- fear it.

Just saying.
>>
NEXT TIME ON SALAMANDER BALL Z

VULCAN READIES HIS NEWEST INVENTION, THE KAIOH-CANNON, TO TAKE DOWN THE NEFARIOUS VEGABBADON ONCE AND FOR ALL. BUT WHEN VEGABBADON READIES HIS INFAMOUS GARLIC GUN, THE FORCE OF THHEIR BATTLE SHAKES THE PLANET ITSELF.
>>
>>21309312

Now this a story all about how
My lasgun flipped turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute just to shoot right that
I'll tell you how I became member of Cadian 5th

Iiiiiin west Catachan, born and raised
On the Deathworld where they killed most of my mates
Shootin' some orks, relaxing all cool,
And all shooting heretics of some underground cult!
>>
>>21309943

So what would Borderlands be? A documentary on what happens when heretech and xenotech fall into the hands of non-Admech?

"Remember citizen, it happened on Pandora, it could happen here too. Report strange and unknown tech to your local Tech-priest."
>>
Four Tank Men and a Grox

In the 40K equivalent of Poland
>>
Teen mom.

a documentary following the life of a group of teenaged Eldar parent and their struggles through unplanned motherhood
>>
Barney the Purple Space Marine
>>
>>21310142
>Unplanned motherhood
>Eldar
Even if that happens, I think they would get all sorts of support from the community.
>>
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>>21309531
BATTLE BROTHER BUZZ, LOOK A XENO!
>>
>>21310157
XENO PURGE
YES JUST ME
THEY CAN'T STAND AGAINST BARNEY
WITH MY BIG BOLTER
AND MIGHTY CHAINSWORD ROAR
THEY'LL BE GONE FOREVER MORE
>>
Orks are probably the only xeno anyone gets to know about on Imperial TV. Super easy to paint the Imperium's superiority alongside them, and no chance of anyone getting into any cults or nothin.

Plus, they're entertaining!

On that note, don't Orks have their own TV stations, too?
>>
Now here is a classic"Ultramarine Peter Pan and the Orcs"

As the narrator tells the viewing audience, the action about to take place "has happened before, and will all happen again", only now it will happen on Ichar IV, in the Realm of Tltramar, where George and Mary Darling's preparations to attend a party are disrupted by the antics of the boys, John and Michael, acting out a story about Ultramarine Peter Pan and the Orcs, which was told to them by their older sister, Wendy. Their father, who is fed up with the stories that have made his children less practical, angrily declares that Wendy has gotten too old to continue staying in the nursery with them, and it's time for her to grow up and have a cell of her own. That night, they are visited in the nursery by Peter Pan himself, who teaches them to fly with the help of his servobot , Tinker Bell, and takes them with him to the Moon of Never Land.
>>
>>21310215
A ship of Orcs is anchored off Never Land, commanded by Captn Hook with his Oddboy, Mr. Smee. Hook boldly plots to take revenge upon Peter Pan for cutting off his hand, but he trembles when the Tyranid that ate it arrives; it now stalks him, hoping to taste more. Hook also forms a plan to find Peter's hideout using the knowledge of Battlesister Tiger Lily. The crew's restlessness is interrupted by the arrival of Peter and the Darlings. The children easily evade them, and, despite a trick by the Warp corrupted Tinker Bell to have Wendy killed, they meet up with the Lost Boys: six Cadian lads, who look to Peter as their leader. Tinker Bell's treachery is soon found out, and Peter banishes her forever (with a Powerfist). John and Michael set off with the Lost Boys to find the island's Inqisitors, who instead capture them, believing them to be the ones responsible for taking the chief's daughter, Tiger Lily. Big Chief, the Inquisitions chieftain and Tiger Lily's father, warns them that if Tiger Lily is not back by sunset, the Lost Boys (along with John and Michael) will be burned at the stake.
>>
>>21310219
Meanwhile, Peter takes Wendy to purge the Eldar. Wendy is considering leaving when the Eldar witches try to drown her, but things change when the Eldar flee in terror at the sight of Hook. Peter and Wendy (who quickly spy on Hook) see that he and Smee have captured Battlesister Tiger Lily, so that they might coerce her into revealing Peter's hideout. Peter and Wendy free her, and Peter is honored by the Ordo Hereticus. Hook then plots to take advantage of Tinker Bell's by looting her remains and revealing the location of Peter's lair. However, his plan to kill Peter becomes a bit compromised when Tinker Bell makes him promise "not to lay a finger, or a hook, on Peter Pan". He agrees, and then locks Tinker Bell in a lantern as a makeshift jail cell. Wendy and her brothers eventually grow homesick and plan to return home. They invite Peter and the Lost Boys to return to Ichar IV and be adopted by the Darling parents. The Lost Boys agree, but Peter is so set on killing Xenos that he refuses, presumptuously assuming that all of them will return shortly. The Orcs lie in wait and capture the Lost Boys and the Darlings as they exit, leaving behind a melta time bomb to kill Peter. Tinker Bell learns of the plot just in time to snatch the bomb from Peter as it explodes.
>>
>>21310223
Peter rescues Tinker Bell from the rubble and together they confront the Orks, releasing the children before they can be forced to walk the plank. Peter engages Hook in single combat as the children fight off the crew, and finally succeeds in humiliating the captain. Hook and his crew flee, with the tyranid in hot pursuit. Peter gallantly commandeers the deserted ship, and with the aid of Tinker Bell's dust, flies it to Ichar IV with the children aboard. However, the Lost Boys decide to return to Never Land, because they fear their kommissars wrath.
>>
>>21310214
>ork tv

Da Nobz of Hazerd
>>
>>21310223
Mr. and Mrs. Darling return home from the party to find Wendy not in her bed, but sleeping at the open window; John and Michael are asleep in their beds. The parents have no idea that the children have even been anywhere. Wendy wakes and excitedly tells about their adventures. The parents look out the window and see what appears to be an orc ship in the clouds. They alert the Planet Defense Forces and then they all get purged.
>>
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>>21310227
>>21310223
>>21310219
>>21310215
> mfw Never Never Land is a symbol for Nurgle and his Daemonworlds.
>>
>>21310251
> Nurgle
> not Slaneesh
>>
There should be an Imperium equivalent of Mulan

About some girl who disguises herself as a dude and enlists in an all-male Guard regiment.
>>
>>21310263
Nurgle is all about stagnation and refusing to change, as is Never Never Land.
>>
I can totally see some Doc Who parody show in the Tau Empire.
The Doctor would be the last of his dying race(Eldar), Necrons would be cybermen. They'd make fun of Sapece Marines by having the colorful, round, silly astartes going from one Xeno planet to another wiping them out yelling "Exterminatus, Exterminauts!!".
And of course the Doctor would have his attractive, blue companion girl, bopping around with him on his adventures...
>>
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>>21310330
Naaah
>>
>>21309631
>GrimDarksiders
>>
Mysterious Cities of Archeotech

Ariator: The Last Sister of the Order of the White Rose

Sabrina the Juve Psyker

Arbiter Cadets: Has Ro Ben received Inquisitor training? That recruit from the water world seems to be able to hold his breath for a long time - is he a mutant? Tech recruit M from Mars seems suspiciously elder-like...
>>
Commissar Time with Cain and Jurgen
>>
>>21309523
Barney is secretly a Slanneshi cultist.
>>
>>21311414
But no one other than Amberley or Cain bothers remembering him.
>>
>>21311166
We are TAU!
>>
>>21311414
>Letting kiddies see jurgen.
No, not if Cain's descriptions are anything to go by.
>>
Danny Xeno
>Purged before the pilot is finished
>>
The real DemonHunters

The exploit of a Squad of Grey Knight and... Their hungry green demon team-pet?
>>
Code Heresy: Slaanesh of the Rebelion
>>
Heretic Girl Quest
>>
>>21311166
Their eyes should be red, but otherwise that's perfect.
>>
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387 KB
>>
Full Metal Techpriest
>>
The Life and Times of Chapter Master Boreale
>>
>>21311889
YES
>>
Teenage Heretic Ninja Xenos
>>
>>21311889
Hnnng! Damn defective memory banks! Where did i first seen that? The original one?

tl;dr sauce of the original?
>>
>>21311938
It's a Power Rangers thing.
>>
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>I don't even know how to 40k this shit
>>
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>>21309157
No it's a kid show.
>>
>>21309631

Assassin's CREEEEED!

You kill chaos cultists by making Baneblades, titans and other assorted vehicles appear form thin air from the most improbable places
>>
>>21311938
I saved it off /tg/ a year or so ago.

I have no idea who created it
>>
Lower Hiver McTou and the Sump-Mutants

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xaCzbqdFS24
>>
>>21309553
And Space Rangers sounds like a chapter name...

I think we have our next project, /tg/
>>
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"My name is Zacariah Bagans, I never believed in daemons until I came face to face with one. So I set out on a quest to purge what I saw back to the warp. With no Grey Knight teams followingnus around, I am joined only by fellow Inquisitor Nickolas Groff and our techpriest Aaron Goodwinius. The three of us will travel to some of the most highly active warptainted locations, where we will spend an entire night being locked down from dusk until dawn.

Raw;
"By the Emperor, kill it, kill it!

Extreme;
"I feel the warp overtaking me..."

These are our Warp Adventures.
>>
>>21312057
>no Grey Knights team

And they were all purged
>>
>>21311966
gets me every time
>>
Event Horizon
A dark movie about an ancient past where a recovery crew is trying to recover the first ship that has ever made a successful warp jump.
>>
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warsmith dino dan

a joke from the old CSM 6th leal threads because >chaos dino's

I had one with him wearing power armour but misplaced it.
>>
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>>21311974
>infiltrating baneblades into your sleeves
>>
>>21308879
So?
Chaos isn't common knowledge.
>>
>>21310451
You now realize the Tau Empire made the first in-setting jokes regarding Space Marines and stairs.
>>
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Servitor Wars!
>>
>>21312155
oh god dino dan is the lamest show ever
>>
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>>21312275
Screw servitors, two custom-built titans slug it out inside a big rock quarry.
>>
>>21312312
YOUR KID SAYS HE SEES DINOSAURS FOR REAL EVERY WAKING SECOND OF HIS LIFE.

GET A SHRINK YOU BITCH.
>>
>>21312155

>fully explaining the joke

Jesus Christ.
>>
>>21312275
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, PRESENTING THE MASTER OF MAYHEM: COMMISSAR CHARLES.
>>
Upotte! 40k

>That's heresy Bolter-chan
>>
Kim Possible, agent of the inquisition.
>>
>>21308661
>not Dora the Explorator
Why?
>>
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41,000 hours of documentary on the history of the Imperium
>>
>>21313117
Oh my god.

OH GOD-EMPEROR THAT IS GLORIOUS
>>
>>21313249
http://wh40k.lexicanum.com/wiki/Explorator#.UIxKRGedbiQ
NO U
>>
>>21313275
Yeah, noticed Explorator=/=Explorer and deleted the post

I admit my mistake, i am a faget
>>
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my little kharn bloodshed is magic
>>
Not a kids show, but Battlebarge Galactica
>>
>>21313327

Red Squat
I mean even if they have been eat-
>>
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291 KB
A Thousand ways to fry
>>
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Strike Sororitas.
>>
>>21313349
Squats are canon again.
>>
>>21313376
fund it
>>
Pockec'tan

The adventures of a Necron C'tan trainer
Gotta shard'em all

btw: i hate wardexes
>>
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>>21309566
That happened. Chanukah special 1995, they did a play about the siege.
>>
Kill the Heretics Charlie Brown!
>>
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>>21309203
>>21309344
>>
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>>21309203
>>
>>21308768
monty pthoons fying circus is more of creeds style.
..
..
and now for somthing compleetly different.
CREEEEEEEED!


alos tomas the titan,
>>
>>21311166
Ethereals
Hear my plea
Help me not to make a
Fool of me
I'll be a Fire Warrior
Wait and see
I will serve the Greater Good
>>
>>21308661
Instead of a monkey Boots is a Psyber-parrot

That's wearing boots.
>>
Top Gear 40k.
>>
>>21309665
And THEN they get purged by the
Inquisition.

For attempting to invalidate the God-Emperor's noble sacrifice.
>>
>>21316651
Some say he's beaten Doomrider in a race while blindfolded

and that he may be one of the lost Primarchs

All we know is, he's called the Stig!
>>
>>21316710
> and that he may be one of the lost Primarchs

HERESY!

BA-BA-BA-BA-BA-BLAM!
>>
Leman Russ fencing.

Dudes with swords on Leman Russes trying to drive closer and hit each other with their swords.
>>
>>21316710
Sum sez dat 'e invented da color red...all we know is, 'e'z called Da Squig.



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