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I was cleaning and I found my gaming stuff and I found a scrap of paper with my old characters name on it. Funzo the Clown. The flood of memories is swell. I wrote down one of his adventures so I'll share it.

>Join Pathfinder with some friends
>They've been playing for a few sessions when I joined
>Magic is seen as evil in this campaign
>I'm up for the challenge to play a wizard
>He's also a clown
>Funzo the Clown
>DM says it's alright as long as I can cover my bases and not do magic out in the open
>I use props to cover for my spells, never speak, only communicate in pantomime and whistles
>Have a monkey familar, Bungo the Great
>Great fun
>>
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>>23534221
>We're low level
>Have to save a town from goblins who've poisoned the well
>The goblins have the antidote in their warrens
>We set off for glory
>Get to where we can see the entrance to the caves
>Start to make plans on how to get in
>Fighter and Cleric want to rush in a slaughter everything
>Rogue and Ranger want to sneak in and slaughter everything
>Funzo has an idea
>They all look at me like WTF but agree
>I use ghost sound to create circus music and walk down there with Bungo
>Everyone is hiding in the bushes nearby, convinced that I'm about to die
>The goblins are losing their shit but one of them explains the concept of a circus and a clown to them
>They lose their shit in a big way and they all gather around to watch the act
>It's show time!
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>>23534250
>Do some normal Clown stuff with Bungo
>Goblins are eating it up and loving it
>Decide it's time to strike
>While Bungo is doing some monkey bullshit I head to the bushes where my party is
>Turn the fighter invisible and have him follow me out, the Rogue sneaks behind
>I pull out a big sheet and ask for a volunteer
>Of course the chief demands to be the volunteer
>I tie the sheet up while the Rogue and the Fighter kill him
>They drag the body away while I clown around pretending to do "big magic"
>I peak behind and fall over, completely hamming it up
>When it's in the clear I rip the sheet down and the chief is no where to be found
>Goblins go absolutely ape shit
>I act surprised and alarmed and laugh
>Tie the sheet back up, and the fighter, who's a dwarf, stands behind the sheet/curtain
>Pull the sheet down and it falls over the fighter
>Motion for another volunteer, the second in command comes up and pulls the sheet off
>Surprise bitches!
>We spring into action and it's wholesale slaughter
>Get the antidote and save the town
>Honk!
>>
And any surviving goblin children were forever terrified of clowns. As it should be.

This is an awesome character and I may have to steal it in the future.
>>
>Trusting a clown.

They got what they deserved.
>>
>ghost sound murder clown wizard

Mandatory.

http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=xbLc88PaMVE&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DxbLc88PaMVE
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>>23534329
Go for it, I thought it was a good joke but it turned into a really fun character to play. We even got into high levels in this campaign.

I like to think that they tell stories of the painted man who turns friends into foes.
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>>23534548
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xbLc88PaMVE
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>>23534266
HONK!
>>
>>23534548
Funnily enough, I don't think I ever directly killed anyone in the entire campaign. I played Funzo as a support wizard, just crowd control, buffing, and tactics. I did pretty well for a guy in face paint who spoke in waves and whistles. Even saved everyone from the BBEG once or twice.
>>
I'm typing up stories as I remember them, I had at least a few with this guy. Here's a punny one.


>Be around 10th level or so
>We're fighting the BBEG's minions
>Get chumped by railroading DM and knocked out
>Waken up in front of BBEG's lieutenant
>Shady fuck, only in it for a profit
>I've been trusted with the bag of holding
>It's in my sleeve
>Lieutenant will let us go if we give him all of our money and items
>Party is tied up and pretty much helpless, but still full of "Fuck Yous"
>I plead with my eyes and whistle that I don't want to die and that I'll do it
>Motion to be untied
>Party starts to call me a turncoat and lament the loss of our shit
>I get untied enough to pull the bag of holding out of my sleeve (it was literally stuffed up my sleeve, I didn't magic my sleeves until later)
>I throw it on the gorund and one of the minions goes to open it
>I whistle an alarm and make explosion noises like the bag is trapped
>The rogue catches on that I've a plan and starts cursing me for revealing his ingenious exploding poison dart bomb trap
>They untie me to let me disarm it and open the bag
>>
>>23535869
>I walk over to the bag and pick it up, then turn away from them and act like I'm entering in a secret code
>Keep goofing around while buying time for my party
>I drop the bag and duck for cover
>Two of the bad guys do too
>I stand up and dust myself off and point and silently laugh at them
>They get mad
>I open the bag and reach inside and pull out with a flourish... a cigar
>They get even more mad
>I do my best pantomime for "No Respect" and reach back into the back and pull out... a bottle of alchemists fire
>Look shocked and toss it into the lap of our Cleric
>Reach back into the bag, act really happy and estatic because I found what I was looking for, I pull out... and a lit candle
>Use it to light my cigar and look around like nothing is wrong
>The bad guys start yelling that they're about to kill me and to stop mucking around
>I reach back into the bag and close it quickly, I look behind me with a look of shame and defeat, big frowny face, sad eyes
>Set the bag down and shuffle off, still smoking my cigar, which starts to leave huge clouds of smoke in the room
>one of the bad guys goes to open the bag
>>
>>23535886
>Out jumps a Lion!
>The lion pounces on the guy and starts to eat his face
>I run around and untie the Cleric while the Rogue slips his bonds and the Fighter smashes into a different guy with his chair, breaking it
>Smoke fills the room for a moment and when it clears my party is invisible
>Complete and utter chaos
>There's a lion trying to eat all of the bad guys >The rogue has backstabbed the lieutenant
>The fighter is swinging a chair leg as a club and using the back of it as a shield
>The cleric threw the alchemist's fire into the fray so the entire room is one fire
>And I'm doing somersaults around the room spraying people with the Color Spray that comes out of the flower in my hat and throwing pies of Blindness at bad guys
>The bad guys die off and as the lieutenant lays dying he asks, "How?"
>Rogue looks at him and says, "You let the damn cat out of the bag."
>Honk!
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>>23535912
>you let the damn cat out of the bag
>mfw
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>>23535912
Oh god my sides! More sir more!
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>>23535966
I'll type them up as I remember them, but I like to type in notepad and dump a story in one go, so there might be some time between them.
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>>23536008
Where do you live, Funzo? You sound like my type of player.
>>
This shit is genius.
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>>23536054
Minnesota, but I don't have time to play PnP anymore, it's the same old story, work and family.
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>>23536187
Solution: Pay pen and paper with your family.
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>>23535912
Beatifull
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>>23534221
>>23534250
>>23534266

These posts cured my cancer. And made me a Panda.
>>
Here's another punny one. It's about Bungo.
Not all of them end in puns but the rogues player has a gift/curse for them.


>Party generally treats Bungo as a waste of space, and generally he was
>Lazy monkey kept eating all of our food and wouldn't stop stealing in towns so we always had a reputation as heroes but ruffians at the same time, really pisses the Cleric off, so the cleric bogarts all of the banannas
>Here's how Bungo the Great lived up to his name
>Our DM is a theatrical guy, he likes to pull all of the strings for dramatic effect, honestly, he's not a bad GM he just can't get the hang of hooks and is too proud to just ask us to play along
>We get drugged in a tavern and wake up in cages
>Even Bungo has a cage albeit it's smaller and weaker than ours
>After a monologue by the BBEG we're left to try to escape while he readies the shark pit (not really a shark pit but you know what I mean)
>Rogue can't pick a lock that doesn't exist
>Fighter can't break the bars
>Clerics are useless when no one's hurt
>It's up to Funzo to save the day
>Look at Bungo, he looks back, I start whistling and cast Enlarge Person on him
>Oh shit, Bungo got big, he's straining the bars, they're cracking, and he's free
>Guard hears Bungo making a mess of bringing our stuff back to us
>Starts to freak out over the giant monkey carrying a waraxe and a hammer
>Bungo turns the guard into paste
>Frees us and takes point
>Rogue picks the lock on the door and we enter a circular room
>Hear guards on the other side of the opposite door
>>
>>23536437

>Everyone gets ready for a fight when the Cleric thinks to look up
>Sunlight is shining down on us
>We're in the bottom of a big well
>Bungo is a giant monkey
>He grabs us and carries us one by one up and out of the well
>Bungo reverts to normal size
>We run to the town paladin chapter and tell them about the bad guys in the well
>Holy smiting and cleansing
>Paladin captain finds us at the tavern
>Tells us how many of the bad guys they got and how we're lucky to be alive
>Asks us what we were doing down there in the first place
>Bungo sitting on the table in between me and the cleric
>Cleric digs a bananna out of his bag and hands it to Bungo
>Rogue looks at the captain and says, "Just some monkey business."
>Honk!
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>>23536448
Sweet, thanks. I can't ever figure out how to screencap right. Also, I think it'd be weird to screencap your own stories.
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>>23536447

Oh my Christ that is funny.
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>>23536447
oh god so cheesy, so good
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>>23536447
HONK!
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>>23536447
So playing a character that couldn't really speak didn't pose too many problems? I've thought about it but always decided against it.
>>
this all makes me want to resurrect the marx brothers and make them do a Lotr parody
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>>23536661
Not really, since it fit in with the character and the game type. If it had been an RP heavy campaign it probably would've been harder but it worked out pretty well. I did end up doing a whole lot of real life pantomiming and jumping around to describe my actions and faces. As for getting a message across by whistling and using sound effects, R2-D2 taught me well.
>>
>>23536724
Harpo was my main influence for the character. Hell, I used to do the mirror scene from Duck Soup with a mirror image spell to entertain the children.
>>
This fantastic, Funzo. Please share more, if you can!
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>>23535912
Living things in a bag of holding?

I am disappoint.
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>>23536470
Step 1: Take as many screenshots as you need to get the whole thing, making sure there's overlap. Either make your window smaller or put your monitor in portrait mode beforehand; wide screenshots are a pain for those with smaller monitors.

Step 2: Crop out borders, the taskbar, etc.

Step 3: If you have Photoshop, use the macro you'd normally use to make a panorama. It should stitch the screenshots together flawlessly. If you're using a simpler program like MS Paint, you'll have to do this by hand. It won't look perfect, but it'll be sufficient.

Step 4: Make sure to save as PNG. JPGs will look horrible, and are generally unsuited for anything that isn't a photo.

If I managed to get anything wrong, feel free to speak up.
>>
I'll try to type up some more stories today since I don't have to work.

>>23537939
I summoned the Lion inside the bag, it didn't live in there.



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