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You are Reinhold, master swordsman and victor of the Royal Swordsmanship Tournament. The King was so impressed with your skill, he personally requested that you be transferred out of the army and into the Royal Guard! Not bad for an orphan who was raised in a brothel in a poor fishing village.

The only issue at this point is your assignment... you've been charged to be the personal guard of the King's only daughter Marianne. While she is the vision of loveliness that you'd expect from a Princess, her personality is... well... she seems to be RATHER unpleasant.

Yesterday was quite eventful. You punched a jerk in the face, got some reading done and managed to scrape out a victory against Nicolette in a sparring match! But today is a new day, sure to be filled with new experiences...

...you really hope you don't have to put up with Monique for a second day in a row, though.


>Guard Rank: RAT
>Congratulations, you are now a pathetic Rat!
>Snakes eat rats... but rats are ranked above them?
>Though she still isn't fond of you, the Princess dislikes you a bit less!
>You're still not considered a person, though.

Thread archive:
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Princess%20Guard%20Quest

Twitter:
https://twitter.com/QM_Archelon
>>
Sore...

...your entire body is SORE.

You want to just lie in your bed and curse Nicolette for making you suffer so, but duty

calls. With a groan, you sit up in your bed and look out the window... it's just before

sunrise, the usual time that you've been waking up.

With a sigh, you stumble out of bed and then get bathed and dressed.

>what do you do now?
>>
>>27320412
Do some stretching exercises, then take a hot soak to soothe the achy muscles. Might also try to swing by an apothacary for appropriate poltices and tinctures. Perhaps a birch bark tincture might help us in getting around.
>>
>>27320455
Seconded
>>
>>27320412
Stretches, more map copying, then make sure we get on duty with time to spare.
>>
>>27320455
this is a wise choice.
>>
>>27320455
this, see if Sophie has any spells related to muscle aches
>>
>>27320455

Agreed, but this time let's also meet the Princess in the usual spot instead of her door. She didn't seem fond of that last time.
>>
>writing
>>
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Well, you're ready for the day...

...but you're still SO INCREDIBLY SORE. Figuring that you won't be at top bodyguarding form if your every muscle is aching, you walk to the bathroom and draw a bath to soak in for a while.

You still can't get used to the fact that you have ACTUAL RUNNING WATER. And it's HOT, too! Back in the day, the closest thing you got to hot running water was when the owner of the brothel you grew up in got mad at you and dumped the contents of a tea kettle on your head.

But that's enough reminiscing the bad old days, now is the time to RELAX.

Soaking...

...aah, this is heaven.

After a while, your muscles stop hurting so much. Taking that as a cue that you've gotten the most out of soaking in the bath, you get back out, get redressed, and head out of the door.

>try and find someone
>do some exploring
>do some reading
>[OTHER]
>>
>>27320813
>do some exploring

Check out some parts of the castle we haven't been in before. Maybe look to try to find the local blacksmith.

But keep an eye on the time.
>>
Rolled 17, 15 = 32

>>27320813
Prepare to meet the princess at the usual place
>>
>>27320813
THAT FUCKING DUCK!
*ahem*
>do some reading
>>
>>27320813
>do some exploring
The Castle is a big place, I'm sure there are still places we're not familiar with yet.

Lets just make sure we don't get sidetracked and end up being late.
>>
>>27320813
>[OTHER]
Let's go and wait for the Princess.
>>
>>27320813
We need poltices and tinctures to help with what remains of the muscle pains. To the apothocary!
>>
>writing
>>
>>27320813
>Other
Find Sylvie and see if she can help with our muscle pain
>>
>do some exploring

Though you've managed to get a pretty good idea of where things are in this wing of the castle, there's still a bunch of places that you've yet to check out. Working off your recollection of the castle map, you head to the south wing of the castle. You're still a bit sore, and maybe the infirmiry there has something that can help you out.

You first head down a nearby stairwell, and then traverse some long hallways, passing some more libraries as you go. (Why does this castle have so many libraries? and is Gerhard in charge of all of them?)

Finally reaching unfamiliar territory, you turn a corner, and...

>roll 1d20, taking the first three rolls
>>
>>27321020
Welp here is hoping the tomboy and the lewd book nerd remember their promises.
>>
Rolled 16

>>27321145
>>
Rolled 3

>>27321145
Exploration go!
>>
Rolled 6

>>27321145
>>
Rolled 17

>>27321145
nat 20
>>
Rolled 2

>>27321145
>>
>>27321145
>>
>writing
>>
WHOA.

Your swordsman instincts kick in and you dodge to the side, narrowly avoiding walking right into someone.

"Wha!?"

...but even though you didn't run into said person, the shock from having you suddenly appear from behind a corner causes them to fall backwards and drop the clipboard that they were carrying.

"Er, sorry about that," you say as you pick up said clipboard and then reach out to help them back to their feet... and then you actually bother to get a good look at the person you just spooked.

"...uh, Melanie?"

>you scared a maid, what do
>>
>>27321323
apologize.
>>
>>27321323

Offer a hand to help her back up and then pick her stuff up as well. Apologize for startling her. Pretty straightforward.
>>
Rolled 19

>>27321323
Flirt and be apologetic, also ask for the princes schedule.
>>
>>27321351
backing this
>>
>>27321323
Seconding this >>27321350
>>
>>27321350
>>27321351
a combo of these two.
>>
Oh come on, we don't have to be flirty with every woman we come across do we?
>>
>>27321350
we already helped her up and picked up her stuff
>>
>>27321413
Sorry, it's /tg/ after school hours, which means all the horny teenagers are out.

For what it's worth, what you said works for me.
>>
>>27321350
This
>>
>>27321413

>every woman

She's not just any woman, she's a maid!
>>
>>27321413
I see it a more of some light flirting that happens when a 17 year old try's to complement a cute girl
>>
>>27321429
>>27321413
eh i like to see the girls reaction, since with the tomboy she would either blush or play along and then there is the lewd mage who just stutters, so i wanted to know what the maids reaction would be.
>>
>>27321413
>>27321456
he has a point we are 17 years old.
>>
>>27321469
So? We're a professional, not a horny teenager.
>>
>>27321492
we are at the height of teenage hormones, and we were raise in a brothel.I doubt we don't know how to flirt.
>>
>>27321492
we are both dem chems dude
>>
>writing
>>
>>27321350
I support this
>>
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"Sorry about that, I should've been more careful," you say as you help Melanie back up.
"That's okay, it's not like I was hurt," Melanie replies as she adjusts her glasses and dusts herself off.
"Oh yeah, you dropped this."

You hand Melanie the clipboard that she dropped, and she bows in return.

"Thank you, it wouldn't be good if I lost these," she says, flipping through the pages and then turning back to face you. "....hm."
"Uh, is something wrong?" you ask.
"This is rather far from both your room and the dining area. Are you lost?" she replies.

>how do you reply?
>>
>>27321682
just a little
>>
>>27321682
just looking around, ask her if she knows any servant shortcuts.
>>
>>27321682
>I was just getting to know the castle a little better before I met the Princess.
>>
>>27321716
>>27321715

Combination of these.

>I was just getting to know the castle a little better, any tips on places I should know about?
>>
>>27321682
I often find myself exploring the castle before I am to meet with the princess.... so yes, hopelessly.

Something to that effect
>>
>>27321740

This one sounds good to me.
>>
>>27321740
this
>>
>>27321682
"I'm not lost, I'm exploring.

I'm new to the castle so when I have free time I often explore so I know where everything is.

What brings you to this part of the castle anyways?"
>>
>writing
>>
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"I was just exploring the castle for a bit, to get to know it better," you say.
"I see," Melanie replies, adjusting her glasses again.
"So, um..." you begin, "you wouldn't happen to have any suggestions for places I should check out around here, would you?" you ask.
"Eh? Suggestions? You're asking me? Umm..."

Melanie looks around, seemingly deep in thought.

"Mr. Niklaus's laboratory is in this hallway, along with a library that contains his research books. The infirmiry is further down the same hall, if you happen to be hurt."
"Hm. Thanks."

Niklaus... that name sounds kind of familiar.

"Mr, Reinhold? Is that all?" Melanie asks.

>how do you respond?
>>
>>27322062
"Who's Niklaus?"
>>
>>27322062
"Please, just Reinhold.

Could you tell me a bit more about Mr. Niklaus? I feel like I've heard that name before but I can't quite place it."
>>
>>27322062
Yes, and give the princess my regards.
Also visit the scientist and if we have time the doctor.
>>
>>27322120

Seconded.
>>
>writing
>>
"Could you tell me who this 'Niklaus' guy is? I feel like I've heard that name before, but I can't quite place it," you ask.
"Yes. Nr. Niklaus is the chief court mage and head of magical research for the Kingdom of Granache," Melanie replies, sounding like she's reading out of an encyclopedia. "He's certainly earned his position, but his personality..."
"Hm? What, is he a jerk or something?" you ask, puzzled.
"It's not like that, but he's rather... never mind. You shouldn't have any issues with him," she replies.

As she finishes talking, Melanie pulls a pocketwatch out of her apron pocket.

"...oh dear. I should be going now."
"Oh, sorry if I made you late," you say.
"No, I should be fine if I leave right now. Goodbye, Mr. Reinhold. I suppose that I'll see you again soon."

Melanie then bows deeply and hurries away, holding tight onto her clipboard.

>you still have some free time, what do you do now?
>>
>>27322420
Well we're already right here, so let's visit the infirmary. We should get on good terms with the doctor before we have to make use of his services.

And he might have the local aspirin equivalent.
>>
>>27322420
Best get back on our punctual schedule. We don't want to be late for breakfast. Again.
>>
>>27322420
Go to the princess considering you were late before she might want to catch you in the act.
>>
>>27322457
>>27322463
He said we still have some free time.

And we weren't late last time, we were exactly on time.
>>
>>27322477
Late for being early is still late. The princess has come to expect a level of service from us and if we are to successfully grope slash be groped by the princess then we must continue to keep up this standard of excellence.
>>
>>27322420
visit the good doctor and take a glance at the wizards room while heading towards the infirmary.
>>
>>27322519
While I agree that we should be early, I sincerely hope it doesn't lead to Princess Groping of either variety.
>>
>>27322420
Go directly to Princess. Do not pass 'Go', do not collect two hundred dollars.
>>
>writing
>>
You're pretty far from the area that you're familiar with. Since you don't want a repeat of yesterday morning, you decide to make your way to the dining room. Backtracking through the way you came, you manage to make it to your usual stomping grounds without too much trouble. From there, you head down to the dining room and take your usual post by the door and wait.

And wait.

An hour passes, and you can finally hear the familiar chatter of maids. Turning towards them, you can see the familiar visage of Princess Marianne.

>greet the Princess!
>>
>>27322774

>>greet the Princess!

Yeah that sounds about right, let's do that.
>>
>>27322774
It became a daily ritual, so lets be a little sarcastic if she says anything mean.
If she is polite than be as polite as her.
>>
>>27322774
>Smile broadly and guilelessly. We're in a good mood.
>>
i just want to ask before i dive through the archives.
does this quest have a twitter page?
>>
>>27322869
Not yet
>>
>>27322869
Just made one like two hours ago.
https://twitter.com/QM_Archelon
>>
>>27322888
Sweet! I had no idea! I need to get around to making you that 1d4cahn page. If anyone wants to beat me to it, go for it.
>>
womg shadow master's followin me

>writing
>>
>>27322888
>https://twitter.com/QM_Archelon
ohh!

thanks!
>>
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"...I see that you're here early," the Princess says to you.
"Just trying to stay on your good side, Princess," you say with a slight bow.

You hear a few maids giggle in the back, but Princess Marianne just looks at you.

She doesn't seem angry, though!

"If you've had enough joking around, I'd like to take a seat now," she says.

The Princess and her maids walk past you and into the dining room, and you follow closely behind. Their chatter seems more lively this morning, but you decide to stay out of it and take your seat.

>say something
>sit quietly
>>
>>27323081
>>say something
We are on good terms with her, ask about her schedule for today.
>>
>>27323081
>>sit quietly
>>
>>27323081
>say something

what is on schedule today princess? are you going to meet your suitors?
>>
>>27323081
>say something

Mention that they seem more lively today, and inquire as to what the occasion might be.
>>
>>27323081
sit quietly
>>
>>27323081
>Exist quietly. If she feels like talking, she can initiate.
>>
>>27323117
This
>>
>>27323108
>implying she won't be married of to Luciana and unite the two kingdoms.
>>
>>27323081
>sit quietly
and just give a please demenor and see if the maids have brought along anything with the princess such as books, papers, etc.
>>
>writing
>>
>>27323117
>>27323152
this is probably due to her friend coming to see her.
>>
I wonder if her friend can be charmed....
>>
>>27323355
We were raised in a brothel.

The answer is no.

It will always be no.
>>
>>27323355
Can? Possibly.

Is it a good idea? FUUUUUUUUUCK NOOOOOOO
>>
>>27323368
>being raised in a place where you have to be charming as fuck to get any good amounts of money.
>>
"You ladies certainly are lively today," you say as you turn to the maids. "Is today some kind of special occasion?" you ask.
"...of course you forgot already," Princess Marianne says, sighing.
"Mr. Reinhold, a princess from Marconetti is scheduled to arrive here today," Melanie says to you.
"...oh. Oh yeah, that's right," you say, mentally berating yourself for forgetting about that.
"All of the castle staff is extra busy today, as we haven't had any foreign dignitaries visit in several months," Melanie continues.
"I see. Thanks," you reply.

Just then, Margot and several butlers enter the dining hall with a dinnercart, and serve you your breakfast. This morning's meal? Several varieties of muffins!

>CONSUME MUFFINS
>have polite breakfast conversation
>[OTHER]
>>
>>27323442
>>have polite breakfast conversation
We already insulted her, there is no good reason to insult her more.
>>
>>27323355
>>27323368
>>27323391
i fear the real truth is, will she grope us agienst our will? we'll find out soon enough...
>>
>>27323472
No, she won't.
>>
>>27323442
>>have polite breakfast conversation
>>
>>27323442
>have polite breakfast conversation
"Will you be taking our guest around town, or do you have another place in mind to go with her?"
>>
>>27323442

As much as I always support being professional, consuming comes before everything. Our gaping maw will consume every last muffin. No mercy, no survivors.
>>
>>27323439
She's a princess. We're an orphan who was raised in a brothel.

We are so far below her standing that the only reason either of them acknowledge our existence is because we won a contest and happened to land this job as a result.
>>
>>27323516
we can still eat like a civilized human and talk to the princess. we are not a starved man now.
>>
>>27323442
CONSUME when no one is looking, at all other times have polite conversation.
>>
>>27323522
i'm not saying we have a real chance, but charming her is a big opportunity for us.
>>
>>27323537

But... but consuming is important.
>>
>>27323555
To get our head cut off, sure.
>>
>>27323597
How would her overprotective/paranoid/possibly holding incestuous feelings father find out we tried to mess with her?
>>
>>27323555

As far as the princess's friend goes, we should cautiously attempt to impress her. Who knows, maybe she's a bro. In any case, Marianne obviously likes her and respects her opinion, and therefore, her opinion is important for our relationship with Marianne.

Also, I mean that in the professional and character-development sense. I don't think the princess would make a good squeeze, I much prefer Nicolette at the moment.
>>
>>27323637
Stop making me want to dig up a picture of the King of Midland to use for whenever he shows up.

>writing
>>
>>27323643
I'm partial to the tomboy myself, but honestly would love to bully/flirt with the lewd mage.
>>
>>27323637
Servants gossip. Peasants gossip. Nobles gossip.

Anyone who caught any whiff of it would spread that shit around so fast your head would spin. Like ours. In the basket.
>>
>>27323664
glad you caught on to that.it was all gutts fault
>>
>>27323637
that is a bit of a streach. we don't know her yet. calm down anon.
>>27323643
you may have a point there. and i agree. we should hook up with Nicolette than anyone else so far. at least she can match us in a fight more or less.
>>
We were raised in a brothel. We were beaten as a child. Frankly, I'm interested in us as a character, more than anyone else we've met.

Although the butler is pretty awesome. Anyway...

We seem to have a rather upbeat and positive outlook considering our harsh upbringing. We would have seen young women, clinging to hope, slowly transformed by age and bitter experience into old, washed-up whores. We would have seen money casually exchanged hands for sex, and for other things, most likely. We'd have seen girls beaten and bruised by their pimps, or their partners; treated like cattle.

Do you know what little boys did in medieval brothels? They didn't serve the fucking drinks, I'll tell you that. I wouldn't be surprised if we were used at some point.

So where was the light in our life, exactly? How did we learn the sword? All in all, we're pretty fucking awesome for having come up out of that as well as we did. That, or the master of the brothel was a more reasonable guy than I'm giving him credit for.

So far, we obviously don't like talking about ourselves. The only thing people know us for is the tournament, so it's easy to deflect questions. No one knows what to ask, either, but we haven't been forward with details.
>>
>>27323701
well if we ever do reveal the skeletons in our closet it would most likely be with someone we trust or are very close too.
we haven't formed any unbreakable bonds but we are starting too with the people around us
perhaps in due time we will reveal some things about us
>>
>>27323683
>>27323692
you guys have read Beserk as well huh.we would experience so much worse
>>
>>27323664
QM archelon, lets not go there. please? ಠ_ಠ
>>27323677
the lwed apprenctice isn't ready for us. time to seduce the tomboy!
>>
>>27323751
Go back to Mahou Shonen quest, waifufag.
>>
>>27323745
yes, that is why i don't want this quest world/plot to go THAT way. beserk is at best tough as hell place to live in, worse, it's a doomed hell and 99.9999% of the human population will be dead.
>>
>>27323731
>>27323701
Do they have the Children's Crusade in this world?
>>
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>>27323770
>>
>>27323804
probably not.
>>
>>27323827
Please?
>>
>>27323840
it would have been a nice little messed up twist, with even a child king.
>>
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>>27323859
>>
>>27323889

Hey, they were being very polite.
>>
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>>27323899
>>
>>27323751

Nicolette is a lady of noble standing. We have no social backing whatsoever. We need to take our time, anon.

However, on the note of becoming friends (and perhaps more), though she lost our bet, we should see if she'd still be interested in going to town with us when she shows up for her modeling session. Then we can ironically end up as a pack mule anyway.
>>
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>>27323859
i never been in that quest, nor do i care much for it.
>>
>>27323937
>However, on the note of becoming friends (and perhaps more), though she lost our bet, we should see if she'd still be interested in going to town with us when she shows up for her modeling session. Then we can ironically end up as a pack mule anyway.

I'll second that
>>
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>have polite breakfast conversation

"So, um... are we going to be showing this other Princess around the city?" you ask.
"...what?" Princess Marianne says, glancing at you. "I thought I told you yesterday, she's here on business. And as much as I would actually enjoy that, I very much doubt that her father would approve of her sightseeing in a foreign city."
"...ah. He's that paranoid, huh," you reply.
"Yes, he is very protective of her."
"I see."

Your conversation done, the two of you get to eating. Taking manners into account, you manage to keep yourself from immediately CONSUMING the muffins, instead eating at a normal-ish pace.

And just as you finish, you hear a knock on the doorframe of the dining hall. Turning in the drection of the sound, you see Arnaud standing in front of the entrance.

"Princess Marianne? I thought you might like to know that Princess Luciana's carriage has just arrived at the castle." Arnaud says, bowing deeply.
"Thank you, Arnaud," she replies.

Princess Marianne quickly finishes off the muffin that she had been eating and then gets up from her seat. You follow suit, and the two of you follow Arnaud out of the dining hall, with the maids close behind.

>say something
>follow silently
>>
>>27323939
Then I would like to request that you please stop shitposting.

>>27323937
Anyone who's genre savvy knew that was going to happen anyways. I mean, really. >Not spending time with Nicolette and Sylvie
>>
>>27323957
>follow silently
>>
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>>27323957
>follow silently
Gotta give a good impression.
>>
>>27323957

>>follow silently
>>
>>27323957
>follow silently
>>
>>27323957
>follow silently
>>
>>27323957

>follow silently

PROFESSIONAL. We can judge later interactions based on Marianne's behavior and how relaxed her friend is.
>>
>>27323957
>follow silently
>>
>writing
>>
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>follow silently

Deciding not to say anything, you silently follow Arnaud and the Princess as they head to the castle's inner gate. As you approach your destintion, you notice that the number of guards stationed is steadily increasing... most likely because of how important this guest is.

Before long, you make it to the castle gate, where you see Nicolette standing next to a plain-looking carriage that's drawn by two very large, back-furred beasts... you recognize them as llamas, but these are about twice the size of the ones who pulled carts back home.

You watch as Nicolette approaches the door of the carriage, and then signals to the other guards to stand back. She then opens the door and steps back as its passenger exits.

But its passenger is someone who you recognize.

Monique Gilbeault.

Nicolette is visibly angered as she watches Monique turn around and help another passenger out of the carriage.

A girl around Marianne's age steps down, wearing a lavish white dress that accentuates her long, flowing red hair. As she reaches the floor, Monique bows and then turns around.

"Introducing to you all, the fourth Princess of the Kingdom of Marconetti, Luciana Violetta di Marconetti!"

>[1/2]
>>
>>27324234
Oh boy, this will have a happy ending I'm sure.
>>
>>27324234
To quote the rest of /tg/
> purge the heretic with fire
>>
Rolled 28

>>27324234

>>Monique

Aaaaaaaaaaaah shiiiiiiiiiit. Our only hope is that his plotting is as bad as his fashion.
>>
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>>27324234
SONOFABITCH, HE JUST WON'T STOP

GO BACK TO THE BORDER WHERE YOU BELONG YOU LITTLE SHIT
>>
>>27324272
>>27324234
>Monique Gilbeault.
Fuck it, honor duel his ass and make him admit defeat like the sniveling little worm he is.
>>
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>>27324272
and kill off all that heroic plot? nope!
>>
>>27324234

Well.

I'm sure he's not the type to hold grudges. I'm sure this will all turn out fine. Nothing bad will come of this.
>>
>>27324234

Ah nuts.
>>
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>>27324234
>Monique Gilbeault
>>27324307
his last words to us, was that he would make us pay.
>>
>>27324324
And that is why we will ignore him. Completely.

He is nothing.
>>
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>>27324234
>[2/2]

Taking that as a cue to move, Princess Marianne approaches the carriage. As she notices her friend approaching, Luciana's eyes grow wide.

"Marianne! I've missed you so much!" Luciana exclaims as she seems to float towards Princess Marianne, giving her a big hug.
"I've missed you as well," she replies with a warm smile as she returns the hug.

You can't help but smile as you watch the hertwarming scene... but then you notice Monique, glaring at you.

>say something
>ignore that punkass bitch
>[OTHER]
>>
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>>27324234
wait... Llamas?
>>
>>27324334
>ignore that punkass bitch
>>
>>27324234
>she's a redhead
Dammit all. Stupid cannot have.
>>
>>27324334
Ignore his punkass bitchness.
>>
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>>27324234
>>27324299
I can't till we beat this fucker up in an honor duel.
This is his fucking face after shoving our wooden sword up his ass.
>>
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>>27324334
>>ignore that punkass bitch

Let the little pussy drive himself crazy. Worst case, he tries to kill us.

Tries.
>>
>>27324334
>>[OTHER]
Wink at the bitch.
>>
>>27324265
>>27324272
>>27324292
>>27324293
>>27324299
>>27324305
>>27324307
>>27324312
>>27324324
>>27324331
Your reactions. They make the massive loss of sleep this quest causes me all worth it.
>>
>>27324334
>ignore that punkass bitch
but keep a warm smile on your face all the while.
>>
>>27324334
>ignore that punkass bitch

>>27324338
Holy shit, I was too busy being angry to even notice the llamas. Is llama-drawn carriage a common mode of transport around here? Because llamas are fucking awesome.
>>
>>27324324

I keep forgetting sarcasm is hard to pick up on through typing.

>>27324334

>ignore

We are going to be so freaking professional he's not going to have a single chance to screw us over.
>>
>>27324359
This
>>
>>27324334
>ignore

Border Bitch? There's no Border Bitch here.
>>
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>>27324334
>ignore that punkass bitch
>[OTHER]
Wink at the fucker and make him do something.
>>
>Ignore the fuck out of that punkass bitch
>Do not fucking wink at the fucking princess what the fuck
>>
>>27324334
>Other
Wink at him with the biggest shit eating grin we can muster
>>
>>27324381
No, we're winking at the Border Bitch
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>>27324362
aims to please!
>>
>>27324334
>>ignore that punkass bitch
>>
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>>27324334
>>ignore that punkass bitch
>>27324381
we were winking at the punk ass bitch.
>>
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>>27324338
Fun with setting notes:

Llamas and the like are the closest thing to hooved animals that this world has. No horses, oxen, pigs, goats, etc.

Also no horned anything, save from true dragons, lightning elemental spirits, and wind elemental spirits.
>>
>>27324376
>>27324359
oh heck no! besides, the princesses might see that and take it the wrong way.
>>
>>27324420
Then what are the primary mounts? Still llamas?
>>
>>27324390
>>27324409
Not Professional enough. When Luciana and Marianne are elsewhere we can soft troll him.
>>
>>27324429
llama cav my day has been made
>>
So what did Border Bitch do that made us punch his stupid face in? I missed that part of the thread.
>>
>>27324420

...Does this mean our kingdom likely has a llama cavalry?
>>
>>27324420
http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/82633783/
Can you find a way to include this situation into the story?
>>
>>27324462
He's a huge douche who has no respect for anybody. He was giving Nicolette (and us) shit.
>>
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>>27324420
that... is unexpected. what an odd world. not a lot of quadraped then. you need hooves if you're going to have big or even full time quadrapeds animals.
>>
>>27324462

He made some very ungentlemanly comments towards Nicollete's parentage. And he was a total ponce.
>>
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>>27324420
BBEG identified.

Abandon all hope, and say goodby to your hands.
>>
>>27324429
Primary mounts are llamas and alpacas that were bred for such. The ones that pulled Luciana's carriage are especially hueg because High Class Royalty.

Granache's main carriages use large reptiles, though.
>>
Rolled 1

>>27324462
Was spectacularly shitty to Nicolette and a general brat, so we fucked his punk ass right up.
>>
>>27324429
It is the ever faithful capybara that carries the kingdom's soldiers to battle.
>>
>>27323701
i am looking forward on the time when the mc bumps to his FAVORITE costumer during some noble meetings.
>>
>>27324450
>>27324464
... we might also have heavy BEAR cavalry as well!
>>
>>27324488

At least we're getting our ones out of the way through unintentional rolls this time.
>>
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>>27324484
Uh oh

UH OH
>>
>>27324334
>>ignore that punkass bitch

>>27324338
Looks like this isn't as eurocentric as it first appeared!

>>27324420
>No horses, oxen, pigs, goats, etc.
Uh... you realize that there's some pretty serious ramifications to a total lack of beings which can pull plow, right? The sort of complex society (aka civilization) that has already been showcased is really not viable without them. Llamas, you know, can't be yoked.
>>
Rolled 84

>>27324500
I'm currently set to 1d100s for another quest and I don't feel like turning it off
>>
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>>27324486
>No hooved animals except ilama types
>does not rule out bird cavalry

Do we has?
>>
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>>27324496
>BEAR cavalry
>>
>>27324510
I assume there are other creatures that has been domesticated in their place.
>>
>>27324334
Overprotective father.
Friends with tsundere maximus.
Managed to ride here with the Flower of the Borderlands.

I like this princess. Something tells me shes more than Monique can handle.
Probably more than we can handle too.
Thank god our only true love is TURKEY LEGS.
>>
>>27324514
Birds would be viable mounts, yeah. Pretty good ones in fact. Better than Llamas, if they're like ostriches; the hip structure is better suited.
>>
>>27324510
If they can breed GODDAMN LLAMAS to replace horses wholesale, there are sure to be substitutes for the others as well.
>>
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>>27324522
>>27324514
This also opens up for aquatic Calvary.
>>
>>27324557
mother fucking EMU MOUNTS
>>
>>27324481
basically were in a "american" continent before the spanish arrive
>>
>>27324514
>>27324522
Maid cavalry.
It why we have so many.
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>>27324575
shit wrong image, it should be either this one.
>>
>>27324589
Negative; our sword is metal... Isn't it? Might be cool if it turned out not to be. If it's llamas, we're South America or Mesoamerica, aside from macahuitls I don't know any weapon that could be called a sword from that area.
>>
>>27324334

Ignore him. Let his petulance boil over as we remain cool. The opposite of love is not hate -- it is indifference.
>>
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>>27324522
Fuck yeah Bears.
>>
>>27324524
More setting stuff that nobody cares about!

Lesser dragons come in a few varieties:

Lindwurms, commonly called Behemoths. Large wingless dragons what generaly muck about and fuck things up. Some varieties have been domesticated, and they get used to pull plows and carts, ate up as livestock, and various other things.

Wyverns, which have wings in the place of their front limbs. It's possible to train them to fly people around, though it's hard as fuck to do and thus their services are expensive.

Leviathans, which are your sea serpents that exist as terrors of the deep. Nobody wants anything to do with them.

Salamanders, which have arms and legs and wings and breathe fire and are dangerous as fuck.


There are also places that use large tortoises to pull carts, though it depends on the region.
>>
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Lizard Calvary and that is all the types of Calvary i can think about being realistic unless you count bugs,rocks,and trees.
>>
>>27324576
remember that old classic video game "Joust"? we're living it!
>>27324589
i can see that too. also. DIRE WOLF/DOG MOUNTS!
>>
>>27324660
There are also places that use ostrich/emu-type birds as transport.

And now I
>writing
>>
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>>27324660
>use large tortoises to pull carts
SHIET we gonna get us some turtles.
>>
>>27324660

Ah fucking leviathans. I hope this quest never goes anywhere near the ocean. Sea monstrosities are terrifying.
>>
>>27324660
Oh. So the basic beast of burden are fucking dragons. Okay then.
>>
>>27324703
>we're guarding a princess
>sea leviathans
I really hope that this land doesn't get any funny ideas about Greek mythology or the like...
>>
>>27324481
Elephants are not ungulates, and they happen to be one of the largest species of extant land animals. And I'm rather certain that no sauropod ever had hooves, their feet were more like those of elephants.
>>
>>27324728
what you mean like the Indus worm.
>>
>>27324710
LESSER dragons, man.

Plus it's still rare as fuck. Not to mention they are more beasts of burden than true chargers.
>>
>>27324703
i doubt, mc will be to bc protecting a kingdom on the center of the continent.

that said shouldn't this kingdom be like really rich? like old constaninople?
>>
>>27324745
they would last longer and are stronger, the only real problem would be breading and feeding the creatures.
>>
>>27324660
New goal: Domesticate the wild Salamander.
The possible benefits outweigh the burns.
>>
>>27324710
well it seems to show they are not as intelligent or even sapient for once. well, at least as far as we know.
>>27324731
I forgot about the elephants and rhinos. Dinos might not be around in this world/age.
>>
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>>27324660
So I take it being a breeder is a ludicrous profession in this setting.
>>
>>27324754
it is why do you think we had lots of exotic customers when were young?
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>>27324768
>not a giant turtle
Its like you hate fun.
>>
>>27324703

hoping to be more like getting those elemental swords together and master them, becoming the first avatar. Avatar Reinhold
>>
>>27324660
wait does this mean
DRAGON MOUNTS
>>
>>27324754
>shouldn't this kingdom be like really rich?
I don't see why?
>like old constaninople?
That was the center of the greatest empire on earth, located on an important trade route.
Why would this city be on that level?

>>27324842
Yes. Wyvern mount would be totally appropriate.
>>
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>>27324810
fire salamander...
water turtle....
now all we need is an electrict rat and we'll be set.
>>
>>27324836
Then we get some other magic which fuses them into the Blade of All Elements and become the greatest swordsman.
>>
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>ignore that punkass bitch


Now isn't the time to be provoked into doing anything stupid. So instead, you ignore Monique and stand guard...

...though you can't resist the urge to wink at him.

You hear him mutter something under his breath, but he has no overt reaction aside from his trembling in anger. Satisfied with that, you focus your attention back onto the Princess.

"Marianne, how have you been? I see that you've gotten even more beautiful! You look just like your mother!" Luciana says, a warm smile on her face.
"...thank you, Luciana. I've been well, though the past few days have been... interesting," she says, glancing back at you and Monique.
"Oh?" Luciana says, turning to you. "And who is this handsome gentleman? I met Mr. Gilbeault when I crossed the border, but he seems to be equally handsome..." she says, smiling at you.
"He's my new bodyguard," Princess Marianne says with a sigh. "Don't get your hopes up though, he's rather ill-mannered."
"Oh? If he's been able to keep up with you, I'm sure he can't be all that bad..."

Princess Lucianna looks over at Monique and smiles, and then approaches you.

"I am Princess Luciana Violetta di Marconetti, and I'm pleased to make your acquaintance," she says as she reaches her arm out towards you.

>kiss the lady's hand
>do something else
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>>27324863
They are crazy smart.
>>
>>27324868
>kiss the lady's hand

Making Monique squirm is always worth it.
>>
>>27324868

Wait, is kissing her hand overstepping our bounds somehow? We did pay attention in etiquette class after all. Monique did it with the princess but he was a total slimeball.

If it's not, go for it.

>kiss the lady's hand
>>
>>27324868
>>kiss the lady's hand
This is proper etiquette, also slightly mention that it, but not directly say it.
>>
>>27324868
How is her hand oriented? If the back of it is up, kiss it. If not she might be expecting a different gesture.
And yeah, introduce ourselves as Reinhold, guard to [our princess's full title] and greatest swordsman in the land.
>>
>>27324868
>kiss the lady's hand
charm = MAX LEVEL! time to show them all we are a good guard.
>>
>>27324857
i assumed this kingdom is located on that kind of route in this world.
>>27324785
why do i get the feeling that reinhold is trying too much to repressed those memories
>>
>>27324868
>kiss the lady's hand
And apologize to her for Gilbeault while we have the chance. He's surely been insufferable.
>>
>>27324868
She offered it,it's alright to kiss her hand, right?
>>
>>27324920
>i assumed this kingdom is located on that kind of route in this world.
Nope, we're inland.
>>
>>27324868
>kiss the lady's hand
"My name is Reinhold, Your Majesty."
>>
>>27324908
Fuck i messes up that sentence.
Kiss her hand, but try and see if you can get the border bitch pissed by mentioning "that its an HONOR when a lady of her standing PRESENTS HER HAND to you" It doesn't have to be that obvious though.
>>
>>27324907
she offered it, i do not see why not? (besides pissing monique off) anyway, when he did it, every knew his character and what not swayed by his act.
>>
>>27324868
grope her hand
>>
>>27324936
>>27324922
These two get my vote.
>>
>>27324917
um... well, not the greatest swordsman. i think there are a few others here at the this place can own us hard if we faced them.
>>
>>27324934
Your grace or Princess would be a little more appropriate, I think.

>>27324936
This isn't the time for snarkyness. Ignore him. He is beneath our station now. he is not our nemesis, not our rival. He's just a small annoyance and that will be gone just as quick as he came. Don't build him up into this monumental edifice.
>>
>>27324934
I think that it's Your Highness, when addressing a princess/prince. I could be wrong, though.
>>
>>27324922
Something like this would work.
>>
>>27324868
>kiss the lady's hand and introduce ourselves

assuming kissing hands is etiquette in her country
>>
>>27324932
well nvm then

>>27324868
>fondle her hand.
>>
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>>27324868
Bow with as much flourish as possible and kiss her hand
>>
>>27324868
> kiss the lady's hand
I am honored to make your acquaintance your highness.
Welcome to (kingdom name here)
I hope you will be at home here.
>>
>>27325013

>Not a good idea

Melodrama during the sparring was for fun and profit.

Not this time. Politics is srs business, and besides, we're being watched by Marianne.

Annoy her when we can increase her affection to us, not in front of other people.
>>
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For some reason arch hearing you talk about your setting sent me on a nostalgia trip.
>>
>>27324868
>kiss the lady's hand
>>
>writing
>>
>>27324957
We won the tournament. We should at least allude to that.
>>
>>27325065
bragging is looked down upon, especially since border bitch does it all the time.
>>
>>27325074
Not brag, just mention it. It's an important credential if we're making a full introduction.
>>
>>27325065
she's probably not seen nor cares much about it.
>>
>>27325065
>>27325082

Stop waving your dicks around and get to being polite to the nice lady.
>>
>>27325086
>she's probably not seen
If she did, we wouldn't need to tell her.
>nor cares much about it.
It's a pretty important bit of status. It's not like I'm saying we should add "perhaps Mr. Gibeault mentioned it" at the end.
>>
>>27324917
pretty sure there are 3 guys living in the same castle who could wipe the ground with us in terms of sword play
>>
>>27325126
add
A butler
A librarian
A wizard
and maybe The tomboy if we roll 1s.
>>
>>27325126
If there's only three even in the royal castle, it still speaks well to our ability.
>>
>>27325137

>and maybe The tomboy if we roll 1s.

We are very good at that, though.
>>
>>27325145
Thats just in swords skills, that's not counting the other guys.
>>
I'm of the opinion that we should convince the librarian to take a few minutes out of his day to draw a small line on us once a day without us noticing it.
As training.
After all we are a bodyguard we need to be able to notice sneaky people.
Anyone else think vajra spark is perfect for us simply becauae its not an honorable way to fight?
Just tossing out ideas.
>>
>>27325137
Idk maybe the King could woop our ass
>>
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>kiss the lady's hand

"I'm Reinhold. It's an honor to make your acquintance, Princess," you say as you kneel down and kiss her hand.
"Oh my, you really are quite the gentleman!" Luciana replies, giggling.

As you stand up, you notice someone else exiting the carriage, a man with long black hair and odd foreign clothing. He glances at you, and then takes position beside the Princess.

"Ah- Marianne, Mr. Reinhold, Mr. Gilbeault? This is my bodyguard, an Eastern fellow by the name of Takamaru." Luciana says.
"Hello. I am here to guard the Princess," he says coldly.
"He may be rather boring, but he's not all that bad. Father's been on a bit of an Eastern kick lately, so he assigned Mr. Takamaru here to guard me after the last fellow's time was up."
"...I see," Marianne replies, staring at Takamaru as if he was from another world.
"He is quite manly, but not quite as handsome as Mr. Gilbeault... or you, Mr. Reinhold!" Luciana says, winking at you.

You laugh nervously, and then glance over at Monique... his expression says that he'd like nothing more than to throttle you right here.

>say something to him
>ignore him, he's nothing
>>
>>27325168
This sounds like a fantastic idea.
>>
>>27325172
Would be nice to know how we would fair against multiple royal guards (wink wink, nudge nudge) maybe we should get another spar going in the future
>>
>>27325178
>ignore him, he's nothing

Peasant.
>>
>>27325178

>>ignore him, he's nothing

So true.
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>>27325168
>>
>>27325178
Continue ignoring the bitch. Give a respectful nod to our fellow bodyguard.
>>
>>27325178
>Thank you, your Grace.
>turn to Marianne
>Where to now, Princess?
>>
>>27325178
We should ask the samurai for a sparring match.
>>
>>27325178
>ignore him, he's nothing
>>
>>27325178
>>ignore him, he's nothing
Just wink at him again.
>>
>>27325178

>ignore him, he's nothing
But, if possible, give him a nice grin just to fuck with him.
>>
>>27325196
Are you autistic or homosexual?
>>
>>27325178
>OTHER: Nod at Takamaru silently.

Snubbing Monique by treating Takamaru with respect.

Perfect passive aggressive combat move.
>>
>>27325178
>>ignore him, he's nothing
Don't give border bitch any attention.
>>
>>27325196
We should do this, but not now maybe later on in the day. It would be valuable learning experience.
>>
>>27325178
Take notice of his bent sword, reminder to look it up in the library for later (Would Reinhold even know what kind of sword that is?)
>>
>>27325178
Thank the princess for her compliment "you're too kind, I couldn't hold a candle to your own beauty", not schmoozing but casual-like. Keep ignoring Monique.

>>27325194
Your Grace is a ducal thing, it would be rude to call a princess.

>>27325208
Cool plan.
We're kind of being a hell of a dick to Monique though. I mean, he's a bitch and kind of deserves it, but it would be nice to be the bigger man.
>>
>>27325207
Not right now, obviously. But I'm interested in comparing our style to his.
>>
I understand why Monique the border guard douche bag is always here. Just think about it some where there is a large group of people that have to deal with him all the time every single day. Let's say you're his commanding officer what do you do? Simple you give him busy work stroke his ego and ensure he spends the most time possible away from the border so you can do your god damn job instead of dealing with this asshole.

Sadly just went back to check and Monique is captain of the border guard. fuck it my head cannon is set that some where there is a grizzled old captain protecting the border doing the best job he can by keeping Monique away so he can do his actual job.
>>
>>27325178
>>ignore him, he's nothing
Nod towards the body guard and ignore border bitch is my vote.
>>
>>27325178
>ignore him, he's nothing

Border Bitch is going to explode at this rate.
>>
I say we nod to samurai and give a ridiculously polite greeting to Monique, like over the top nice
>>
>>27325222
Grizzled old lieutenant who's the one that actually does the work, but doesn't have the top spot because ~nobles~
>>
>>27325229
Perfect! If he comes at us straight, we can off him fair and square.
>>
>>27325235
"How's your nose healing up?"
>>
>>27325222
>Let's say you're his commanding officer what do you do?
He's the CO, actually. Being nobility has its perks. He's here because he wants to feel important, and walking along with important people is the closes he gets to that. Think from his perspective, he's a third son who failed to get the lofty position he wanted and is consigned to the border, effectively preventing him from achieving any advancement. Sure, that's a lofty position from our point of view, but compared to his father, his oldest brother, and probably his second oldest brother, it's fucking nothing.
>>
>>27325178
>Ignore the cunt.
>>
>>27325242
Ouch. Kinda feel a bit of pity for the poor bastard now.
>>
Or we could throw all the back talk he is going to do into question by complimenting him to others.
>>
>>27325260
If there's an opportunity we can. We're one step above peasentry, but that doesn't mean we can speak without being spoken to. We're still furniture at the RAT level.
>>
>writing
>>
>>27325270
true, we have to be knighted and for that to happen we need to do alot of work.
>>
>>27325260

This is a good move. It will really throw him off if we're in a group situation and someone asks about him; and then, right in front of his face, we introduce him by his profession as captain of the border guard, a noble protector of the realm, and an incredibly skilled swordsman.

At worst, he'll blow it off as an attempt to troll him; at best, it might make him rethink his obvious loathing of our person.
>>
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>>27325178
>>
>>27325252
Don't get me wrong, his comments to Nicolette were still totally unacceptable. But I can't really look down on him too much for trying to look impressive and ingratiate himself with important people. I mean, he's doing a fucking abysmal job of it but I can't hate the kid for incompetence.

And even the parentage comments I can kind of understand, since his bloodline is really all the guy has to be proud of.

>>27325294
He is all those things, and it would only make us look mean and petty to insult him in front of others anyway. Doing it in front of a foreigner could additionally be seen as unpatriotic.
>>
>>27325178
MANLY HANDSHAKE

its an unwritten law between swordsman to know how MANLY your swordsmanship is.
>>
>>27325306
As I've said before: Don't shit where we eat. We can be catty little whores out of sight and earshot of Luciana and Marianne. As long as we only soft troll Monique we're largely untouchable, since any damage to us will not be taken lightly by Marianne....or the King.

tl;dr: Play it cool.
>>
>>27325306
We should probably apologize at some point, honestly. I mean, what he said was genuinely inexcusable, but...
>>
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>>27325325
>>
>>27325331
Nah. It's in the past. He did a bad, we did a bad, now the issue has been settled. No grudges.
>>
>>27325325
as long as we don't show our HONOR yet.
>>
>>27325178
It occurs to me I wasn't clear on who the "him" was. Politely nod to Takamaru. I assume a nod is a polite but fairly casual greeting between men in this culture? If not, do whatever's an appropriate equivalent.
Keep ignoring Monique.
>>
>>27325331

Something tells me he's not the type that will accept an apology with grace and understanding. I do agree we should eventually try, though. Preferably before he actually DOES manage to get revenge somehow.
>>
>>27325331
>>27325344
He would either think of you are making fun of him or think a peasant such as ourselves has no right to ask for forgiveness.
>>
>>27325306
Nope. This guy is just a relentless social climber hoping to latch on to anything to increase his social standing and importance.
Hence the flattery and desperate attempts to insinuate himself into royal circles.
He wants to be more important and doesnt care who or what he uses towards that end.
He embodoes the worst traits of nobility lacking in any type of nobless oblige.
His men are probably grateful he's gone
>>
>>27325370
>Nope
None of those things you said are mutually exclusive with anything he said, bro.
>>
>>27325344

An apology would imply that we regretted what we did and wouldn't do it again. Since that would be a lie, I'd be against it. That doesn't mean we have to go out of our way to antagonize him, and if he shapes up I have no problem working with him, but if he gets out of line in front of us again, he's going to get smacked down again. He'll either learn to behave like a gentleman, or he's going to have a rough time.
>>
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>ignore him, he's nothing

Ignoring Monique entirely, you instead turn to Takamaru and nod to him silently before returning to your place behind the Princess. Takamaru returns your nod, smiling faintly.

"Ah... it's wonderful to see you again, but I suppose that I should get back to the matter that brought me here..." Luciana says, a disappointed look on her face.
"I see," Marianne replies, her previous smile slowly fading into her usual expression. "Perhaps we'll be able to talk more after you're finished with your business."

Nicolette approaches Princess Luciana, motioning towards a doorway.

"Everything's ready for you now, Luciana," Nicolette says to her.
"Very well, Nicolette!" Luciana replies with a smile. "I'm so surprised that you managed to become Guard Captain already... it wasn't so long ago that you were a new recruit, was it?"
"Yes, well... it took a lot of hard work and guts to get this far, but I still have a ways to go before I can become a Knight," she replies.

"Actually, -Miss- Nicolette, I believe that it would be appropriate that -I- escort Princess Luciana to the King," Monique says as he walks towards the two of them. "I've escorted her this far, so it would only make sense that I see her all the way to her destination," he says to Nicolette.
"My apologies, -Miss- Monique, but as the only Royal Guard Captain here, it's -my- responsibility to escort important guests," she replies, making a death glare at him.

>interfere
>let it play out on its own
>>
>>27325421
>let it play out on its own

Nicolette can handle herself, only time we need to interfere if she loses it and tries something stupid like punching him in the face again.
>>
>>27325421
>Suppress the desire to laugh.
>>
>>27325421
"Didn't we play this game once already?"
>>
>>27325421
>Let it unfold. Slow play, baby.
>>
>>27325421
>let it play out on its own
>>
>>27325421
"I'm quite certain we can afford to spare multiple guards for a guest of this importance".
>>
>>27325421

Everyone.

Everyone.

Take a deep breath.

We've got to back away from this one. This is exactly what we were warned about. International incident in the making if we fuck with this.

Nicolette won't allow herself to be provoked again. Maintain stoic professionalism, the current debate is above our pay grade.
>>
>>27325441
Suppress by stifling a laugh
>>
>>27325421
"Nicolette, don't make me knock him out again, Monique, don't make me knock you out again.

Now children, behave."

us bodyguards shall escort the little girls
>>
>>27325421

>>interfere

"I do believe we have established precedence for this sort of situation."
>>
>>27325421

Let it play out. Nicolette is quite capable of taking care of herself and it would be insulting to try to step in over every little thing. On top of that, trying to do her job and ours is a sure way to suck at doing both.
>>
>>27325421
> let it unfold.
Crack the knuckles in our hand right in the middle of lady Monique's snarky reply.
>>
>>27325421
While those two are arguing, escort them yourself. Preferably without them noticing.

HA.
>>
>>27325421
give him a good slap across the face and tell him he caused enough trouble already
>>
>>27325461

Sorry, mistyped.

"I do believe there is established precedence in this situation."
>>
>>27325453
>Nicolette won't allow herself to be provoked again.
She just called him "miss" in front of a foreign dignitary.
>>
>>27325482
>motion silently towards the door
>everyone walks out
>they dont notice
>just standing there on their own arguing
>>
>>27325421
>let it play out on its own

No need to give Luciana the impression we're an uncultured dog, especially since she apparently doesn't know how much of a prick Monique is yet.
>>
>>27325491
And?

>>27325482
lol'd. If we can get away with this I'm all for it.
>>
>>27325421
>let it play out on its own
>>
>>27325500
Nicolette is hardly giving a good showing of herself either.
>>
>>27325421
>let it play out
if it doesn't resolve after another exchange then subtly motion towards the door
>>
>>27325511

So we should totally imply acts of violence towards a fellow government official in response, riiiiiiight.
>>
>>27325511
Yeah, but she's the Hot Blooded Young Cop, it's fine when she does it.
>>
>>27325523
You realize we can "interfere" without physically assaulting Monique? I know it's unintuitive, but it's possible.
>>
>>27325526
She's the Hot Blooded Young Cop?

damn..... guess that mean's i'm the old vet with one day until retirement.

was nice knowing you guys while it lasted, i'm toast
>>
>>27325538
We're the Main Character Detective, not the Grizzled Detective Who's Too Old For this Shit.
>>
>>27325537

Let's see

>>27325461
>>27325481
>>27325483
>>27325444

Really giving me a lot of confidence there guys.
>>
>>27325549
Or
>>27325451
>>
Princess 2 and royal guard lady know each other well enough to be on first names.
And anyone with a brain who spend several minutes with lady Monique can tell what he is.

Part of me thinks that there is a late night girls only pokergame slash girl talk going on.
Nicollete, marianne, sylvie, a miad or two, lucianni all having far too frank a discussion about us.
>>
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>>27325546
Oh sorry, got my quests mixed up
>>
>Don't say anything

We're professionals here, keep our mouth shut.
>>
>>27325554
Missed that post the first time around actually, that's probably th e most diplomatic possible solution.
>>
>>27325554

Wow, literally one person made a reasonable suggestion everyone is ignoring, really makes my day.
>>
>>27325451
I didn't see this with all the suggestions to punch someone in front of royalty like a fucktard

Please, let's do this, the diplomatic approach.
>>
>>27325558
Based on my experiences with women, they probably talk about which guys (including us) are hottest. We very well might hold that title for most of them.
>>
Five more minutes before I close voting, guys.
>>
>>27325451

This, this so friggin much.
>>
>>27325588
I don't think much is going to happen in those five minutes.
>>
>>27325582
Flex rhymes with sex, after all.

>>27325578
Or, you know, we just not get involved. We're a bodyguard, not a white knight. Nicolette can fight her own battles.
>>
>>27325571

Ah come on now, what fun would a quest be if we took the logical, reasonable option every time?

Ah, fine, let's be diplomatic. But if he goes back to personal insults again we will make our snarkery known.
>>
>>27325526
it will sully her HOUSE and reputation for knighthood though, better us one-namers.
>>
>>27325450

Changing vote to >>27325451

I can't believe I missed that.
>>
>>27325588

I think we've pretty much run the gambit here. Healthy majority want us to stay on the sidelines.
>>
>>27325571

Well, I still think the best action is to stay out of something that's none of our business, but I already gave my opinion. Discussing that point would make more sense among the group that wants to step in, but most of those just want to see blood, so... yea, that one isn't going to get a lot of attention.
>>
>>27325596

Perhaps I would taken enjoyment at me saving money on repairs to my desk.

Facial indentions are no joke.
>>
>>27325610

I really don't care, as long as we don't do something fucktarded like anything to do with violence.
>>
>>27325549

>>27325444 Here.
I really meant it more of a "can we please not argue in front of a foreign dignatary?" Kind of way. But, it's a bitch to convey tone through text.
>>
>>27325451
I disagree.
This man has no business bothering the king.
None.
>>
>>27325451

This.
>>
>let it play out on its own

We're a guard now, not a bouncer at a brothel. We're meant to be seen, not heard.
>>
>writing
>>
>>27325594
some one says the keyword, we assassinate the 2 princesses, we remember we were assassins all along which explains his "hazy" past.
quest turns pans out on how to escape, once we do OP reveals the true quest name.
>>
>>27325655
Not the worst twist in the world.
>>
>>27325655
Samurai guy wouldn't let us though, he'd chop us in half before we even drew our sword.

But I'm all for ridiculous paranoia so let's continue. Maybe it turns out WE WERE UNDEAD ALL ALONG
>>
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>>27325655

I can't actually see this happening, but I'd be ok with it.
>>
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>>27325700
>Maybe it turns out WE WERE UNDEAD ALL ALONG

I STILL say that bad feeling we never figured out was a Dark Spirit invading.
>>
>>27325655
this will be the longest prologue quest ever.

and the part where we were working in a brothel was actually tru-
...
hmm.
>>
>>27325700
>Maybe it turns out WE WERE UNDEAD ALL ALONG
but we do feel pain and exhaustion, aren't undeads (and artificial beings overall) immune to these?
>>
>>27325703
>>27325727
>>27325668
>>27325655

[paranoia intensifies]
>>
>>27325737
It's merely pain and exhausting that we're feeling because we feel we should be feeling them as a normal human
>>
>>27325737
We could be a very sophisticated undead.

Or this theory is bunk.
>>
>>27325750

REALISM!
>>
>>27325737
Not if we were hypnotized all along and only felt it psychosomatically.
>>
>>27325737
not if someone programmed us to do it.
>>
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>>27325655
>>
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>>27325759
>>27325761

>mind control mind
>>
>>27325777
i did not say "mind" good sir.
>>
is this archive btw?
in before this>>27325655 happens.
>>
Cant we just be bastard son of the king and enjoy our wholesome incestuous relationship with the princess
>>
>let it play out on its own

"Oh dear..." Princess Luciana says as she watches the two argue. "Mr. Gilbeault?"
"What is it, Princess?" Monique replies, switching back into "suave" mode.
"I understand your desire to see me to my destination safely,' she begins, "but... you see, Nicolette and I have been acquaintances since we were small children..."
"Is..." Monique gulps in fear. "Is that so..."
"Yes. But due to our positions, I see her even less frequently than I do my dear friend Marianne," she replies, pouring on the charm. "I'm sure such a dashing gentleman like you would understand how I feel, yes?" she finishes, putting her hands on her chin in a pleading fashion.

"Um... well... yes, I understand completely, Princess! Captain Nicolette, please make sure that the Princess Luciana reaches her destination quickly!" Monique says with a bow. "I do request that I be allowed to escort you to the border when you leave, however."
"Oh, I couldn't imagine otherwise!" she replies with a beaming smile.

As Monique turns towards the gate with a goofy grin on his face, Nicolette, Luciana and Takamaru head through a nearby door and out of sight.

"My, that certainly was quite the scene," Arnaud says from behind you.
"...it certainly was -something,-" Princess Marianne replies as she turns towards another door. "Come on, I suppose I ought to be getting to my classes."

>say something
>follow silently
>>
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>>27325824

No.
>>
>>27325824
this is not a GoT quest.
>>
>>27325827
>>say something
Whisper to Nicolette
"Nice burn."
>>
>>27325827
>"She handled him like a well trained dog."
>nod sagely in approval, remain silent after that.
>>
>>27325827
I think the princess Luciana is the type who knows just what buttons to press.

She probably is only flattering our "handsomeness" for funsies.
>>
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>>27325830

but fantasizing about killing the princess is a-ok
>>
>>27325821

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Princess%20Guard%20Quest

Read the first post.

>>27325827

>follow silently

Not saying anything at all has worked out for us so far, why should this be any different.
>>
>>27325827
>follow silently
PROFESSIONAL time.
>>
>>27325827
>>follow silently
>>
>>27325851

Nicolette and the rest left separately from us.
>>
>>27325827
Follow silently. No need to do anything else.
>>
>>27325827

Follow silently.

Can we just assume from now on that we stay silent and do our job while we're in public? Unless there's a good reason not to, that's been our choice every time, so just assume we don't make ourselves and our charge look bad, and that we know how to solder on.
>>
>>27325873
Ok, we'll mention that next time we meet her.
>>
>>27325862

Those were jokes, and how many times do we have to explain to people that shoving our dick into the princess is bad?
>>
>>27325827
>follow silently
like an assassin
>>
>>27325894
As many times as there are autists, times infinity, because they're autists and literally don't understand why a loose, contextless dick isn't the funniest thing ever.
>>
It just occured to me that with the proper healing spell it would be completely possible for a woman to fake virginity.
My god. Luciani could be treating her father's paranoia like a high class escort service or seduction game and noone would ever know.
Because whose going to tell thw hyperprotective king his beloved daughter seduced them.
When shes still a virgin.
It would be hilarious to walk in on her trying to seduce grumpy japanese man.
>>
>>27325894
>shoving our dick into the princess is bad?
it sounds it would be so much fun though...
>>
>>27325862
we are not romancing any princess.
ever.
heck i am ok with spirits even, just not royalty.

its just that i don't want another civ game.
>>
>>27325913
Like many things in life, it would indeed be tons of fun, but you don't do it because of the horrible consequences that make the entire endeavor not even close to worth it.
>>
>>27325911
Yeah, setting her up with a new man frequently did seem like a somewhat flawed plan to me as well.
>>
>>27325827
Stay silent, no need to say something that may hurt our new found gentlemen status
>>
>>27325827
By the way, how much time you use for gathering votes before writing?
>>
>>27325932
This

Royal Guard Captains- Go for it
Maids - That's what they are there for
Adventurers - If they're pretty
Water nymphs - fine
Dragons - have at it

Princesses - No no no no no no no no no no
>>
>>27325911
you're ignoring the fact that there could be a (divination?) spell to see if she's a true virgin or not
>>
>>27325939
I reckon that her 'bodyguards' are actually escorts of a different sort, and daddy dearest just can't say no to his baby when she wants a new...toy.
>>
>>27325948
what about
lewd mages
Funny assassins/thief
Childhood friend(who the fuck am i kidding)
>>
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>>27325969
>Childhood friend
>we grew up in a brothel
>>
>>27325969
>Funny assassins/thief
There's basically no way that will end well either.
>>
>>27325969
Mages are kinda crazy

Thief is okay as long as they go to bed tied up ever night.
>>
>>27325979
Daughter of brothel owner, street rat, or a whores kid.
>>
>>27325979
So in other words, we've probably already got with out childhood friend!
>>
I am instituting a new rule: We're not allowed to talk about boning people who have fathers that outrank us.

Nothing good can come from this.
>>
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>>27325979
>one of the castle maids has a dark past
>>
>>27325969
>Childhood friend
>childhood
>friend
>areyouevenserious.jpg
>>
>>27325946
Fifteen minutes in general.
Got distracted by Symphogear, though.
>>
>>27325996
Probably a good general policy.
>>
>>27325969
anything is fine as long as long its not royalty.

there is a reason why most civ quests are dying.
>>
>>27325996
what about noble cougars?
>>
>>27325958
Maybe. But kind of like modern paternity tests it would be pretty insulting to demand a magical inspection of her aura.
And what if she just remained a virgin until the psychic residue or whatever faded? There are millions of reasons to postpone royal weddings.
Honestly it depends on the natire of magic as to whether or not the princess is doing anything untoward.
But she seems like the type.
>>
>>27326033
Apparently the intent wasn't clear enough: If she or her father outrank us then she is not to be discussed.
>>
>>27326019
Sex with royalty wouldn't turn this into a civ quest. The problems are entirely social, not meta.
>>
>>27325996
i would sign on that declaration.
>>
>>27326041
>But she seems like the type.
We've only just fucking met her, how can you make that kind of evaluation already?
>>
>>27326045
but she- she is old enough to support herself!
and! and..i...ok...
>>
>>2732599
That includes nicolette. And sylvie. And the most of the handmaids.
>>
>>27326060
Auties, dude, this is /tg/. Don't get mad, they literally can't help themselves. Just breathe in, count to 3, remember that you're a well adjusted anon, and exhale.
>>
>>27326060
welcome to /tg/ friend.
>>
>>27326060
Because she knows a lot of guys! That makes her a slut just like the girls at school!
-said every single autist in the thread
>>
>>27326090
Ahahahahahah oh god, Anon, I lol'd. That was a good one.
>>
>>27326060
She is an impressIve manipulator with an overbearingly overprotective father in her rebellious teenage years.
She also seems to possess a confident air despite her young age and as mentioned before is not a stranger to dealing with men. Even difficult men like Monique.
>>
>>27326103
...yes
that's called
being good at her job
holy fuck you fucking spergs just do not understand
>>
>>27326103

>She is not a stranger to dealing with men and is confident. Also she might have father issues! Clearly a manipulative slut.

Jesus christ.
>>
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>>27326103
you got the wrong princess then~
>>
>>27326129
pretty awesome feeling isn't it?
>>
>>27326149
Of being, what, like the three of us who aren't utter animals? Feels kinda bad, man.
>>
>>27326128
>>27326129

Everyone /tg/ has seen so many characters in so many settings in so many adventures or stories that everyone here had a mental library of core stereotypes. I know I do. Every character can be considered a variation of a stereotype.

Is it any wonder that someone's first reaction is to compare and contrast with experience, and then take an educated stab at a likely character subtype?

That said, going as far as leaping to "her bodyguards are rotating boytoys and she uses healing magic to cover the fact that she's not a virgin" is a little...

...I don't have a word for it.
>>
>>27326162
I do: Autistic.

Look, I'm not faulting the process here, because stereotypes are how we categorize a large part of our existence as people - we see a pattern, we file it away, rinse wash repeat.

We're not thrilled about the conclusion.
>>
>>27325827

>45 minutes later

You still here arch?
>>
> Be princess with paranoid father
> have a new guard every month to prevent anything "improper" from occuring, never get to know anyone
> recieve diplomatic training daily
> people assume you're a slut because you're used to dealing with strangers all the damn time and god forbid you learn how to get rid of idiots

Being the princess is suffering.
>>
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>>27325981
that is why its good.
>>
>>27326129
....
Woah.
Hold the phone a sec.
I don't care if the princess sleeps with twenty guys a DAY.
I never said that a sex life made her a slut.
I don't think a sex life would make her a slut.
Women are allowed to sleep with men without being sluts.
I merely made a comment on a likely reaction to her father being so restrictive.
Its not a judgement.
Having said that i will drop the subject permanently and remember in the future to avoid landmines.
>>
>>27325827
>Follow silently

Few things are worse than watching a quest thread you've been following since it started play out over the course of the night, and for one reason or another be unable to respond.

I'm finally back, thank god.
>>
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>follow silently


Saying nothing, you follow Princess Marianne through the winding halls of the castle until you finally reach a familiar room. You open the door for the Princess and then follow behind her, where you are met with the scowling face of Sir Gregory.

"Good morning, Sir Gregory," the Princess says.
"...not very much of a good morning at all, all that garbage with the carriage from Marconetti and that moron from the Border Guard had me busy all morning..." Sir Gregory replies, sighing deeply.
"I thought that Nicolette was supposed to handle that now instead of you," she replies, a bit surprised.
"Yeah, well I'm sure you know by now that Nicolette's bullshit always becomes MY bullshit, and... forget it, let's just get on with today's lecture." he says, clutching his forehead as if he had a headache.

Sir Gregory then starts a long speech about economics. You try your best to pay attention, but such matters are about as far from your expertise as it gets. After about an hour, he finishes talking and resumes his usual foul expression.

"...Reinhold," he says to you as you're about to leave the room, "that Gilbeault kid didn't try anything today, did he?"

>how do you respond?
>>
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>>27326156
>three of us that arent utter animals
So, because one dude is going full retard you assume that you're the only people around who arent complete idiots?
Not agreeing with his point, since its a bad one, but you're going a bit too far with the superiority.
>>
>>27326183
You were less offensive when you were just autistically creepy. Now it's sad.
>>
>>27326189

"Not really."

Well, he didn't
>>
>>27326189
"He tried to escort the princess and rile up Nicollette, nothing else that I saw. Par for the course for him"

Woooo first response tonight
>>
>>27326189
tell him he tried to force his way into escorting the visiting princess but Luciana handled it
>>
>>27326189

"He tried to insert himself as Luciana's personal guard, but she deflected it pretty handily. Luckily she's not the type to be offended."
>>
>>27326189
>"He tried, again, to worm his way in. Nicolette called him out and then Luciana shut him down. Somehow he walked away smiling. She is very good at her job. Thankfully he didn't have any "words," like he did before."

>>27326192
Of those voices actively participating. As far as I know there could be a silent majority and the spergs are only a vocal minority, but this late what seems to be isn't always how it is.
>>
>>27326189
"He tried, once again, to insist on providing the escort to the King instead of allowing Nicolette to do it. Princess Luciana shut him down quickly and diplomatically, so nothing came of it."
>>
>>27326189

"Nothing unexpected. Just the same argument as yesterday."
>>
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>>27326202
Sorry to 1up you mate, but...
>>
>>27326208
>>27326204
>>27326202
Let's not gossip about him, he's a big enough pain as it is

"He was acting rather pushy but Miss Luciana put him in his place."
>>
>>27326220
Hah, no, I'm this guy

>>27326184

Been lurking all night because I've been busy and could never quite post
>>
>>27326189
Nothing too out of character. A bit of sass and ass kissing but besides that nothing to consequential
>>
>>27326189

Nothing too bad. He was in the carriage when the princess pulled up, and he argued with Nicolette a bit about continuing with the party, but Princess Luciana settled him down without any issues, and I didn't see him do anything that would outright embarrass us. All in all, I guess you could say he was on his best behavior.
>>
>>27326212
this
>>
>>27326222
She's a little more than a "Miss," don't you think...
>>
>>27326233
Ah

Right

All I'm saying is: we should refer to her by her proper title.
>>
I have an exam tomorrow so I guess I'll call it a night here, guys. Feel free to keep on voting or whatever, I'll read it all in the morning.

I'm busy tomorrow, so the next thread will probably be late Saturday night. MAYBE Friday night, depending on how busy I am.
>>
>>27326189
"he pretty much acted the exact same way as he did with the messenger. fortunately, princess luciana tactfuly send him on his way but if she didnt, things might've turned quite sour. someone needs to make him understand his guarding duties end at the gates. or make it last all the way, as much as i dont like the guy being here more, it would at least prevent a fight from occuring every guest or messenger we have. i really prefer the first option though."
>>
>>27326251
Glad I caught you before you went, thanks OP!
>>
>>27326251
hoping for good results on your exam!
don't procrastinate OK!?
>>
>>27326212
this
>>
>>27326189
Man, you're taking so long to write. Maybe cut the vote counting time to ten minutes top.
>>
>>27326656
did you not see >>27326251?
>>
>>27326681
No, I mean in general. Looking back to his previous thread, he sure takes his time sometimes.

I like the quest so far, but the waiting time tends to get out of hands.


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