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/tg/ - Traditional Games

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Previously, on Super Bizarre Slime:

Steam Group:

Transcending history, and the world, a tale of dicks and souls, eternally retold.

We join our group of bizarre travelers, bound together by an even more bizarre destiny, amidst their final journey and destination.

The camera pans to a blonde and blue haired kid jamming his pinky inside of his ear canal. This would be Zeke Northwind, the party's cunning and vigorous shota. Though merely supposed to be used for bait against monster girls, he now sits among the front as a credit to the team.

"-He's incredibly quiet for a kid who just lost his father and endured hell's visage itself...", the red haired man in the desert priest attire mentions openly.

"...", Zeke stares forward, his eyes full of maturity and understanding uncommon very much among children his own age.

"I can't possibly fathom how a young mind could possibly digest such heart wrecking news..."

"...!", Zeke's face immediately lights up the moment he sees something shiny off in the distance, "OOOOOOOHHHHH"

"W-Wha...? Where is he-?", the red haired man watches the boy run off joyfully in search of adventure.

"Why is he playing with a broken beer bottle.."

Zeke picks up the beer bottle piece and admires it with a strangely serene smile. Zeke was diagnosed with possible ADHD.

"That boy ain't right", the black man with the dragon scaled armor mentions aloud.

The camera pans next to the blue haired dragon girl with the inhumanly slit pupils inside white eyes and tiny dragon wings ill befitting her stature. She casually sips a can of a name brand alcoholic beverage in polite dignity befitting a princess of the beloved Toth family, a family of royal dragons. She burps out her name in flames, spelling 'Ossla Toth' in bold italics. Truly, she would be the party's physical powerhouse.

"Tastes better going down than coming out", Ossla nods with unexpected seriousness.
A devious and cynical looking woman clad in a hooded cloak that conceals her eyes stands next to Ossla, waving her hand in front of her face as a gesture of how much the dragon girl's breath stinks. Her lipstick, green with eyecatching malevolence, her hair, green as per her family's credo, she stands proudly as a member in a long line of mid-bosses. Adena Blight.

"Heh heh, your name kinda looks like 'A Den of Blight', Adena", a white haired girl in braids, wearing pink and white clothing suddenly points out to the sorceress.

"...Ivy, I'm curious", Adena suddenly turns to the petite looking girl, her strong awe-bewildering voice speaking in clarity, "Dhampir's have a problem with the sight of blood, yes? What do you do when your time of the month comes?"

"-Ah", the petite girl stops in her place, look of bewilderment apparent, apparently.

Adena makes a variant of a certain hand gesture before the Dhampir, a mocking yet humorous motion, her vile lips curling into a unpleasing smile.

"Well gee...", the petite Dhampir girl scratches the back of her neck nervously, "I'd have to suck my own dick, I guess"

"Careful, you'll break your neck if you're not"

"Heh heh", Ivy scratches her nose in a teasing and playful manner.

Although they've only met recently, the two seem as though they've become well adjusted chaps, chapping it up as they chap one another's personality in chap related chap exchange.

The girl in the white braided hair, Ivy Illzvolt is a Dhampir, and a professional pro wrestler. She goes from town to town wrestling monster girls. And that is her entire life story.

Ivy is not a very complicated character.

"Sure has been awhile, hasn't it, Mary?", Ivy talks to herself as she touches her ear in a different sort of playful mannerisms.

Who the fuck is Mary? Ivy is a very complicated character...

"Oi, Sparky~!", a bizarrely energetic female voice breaks the exchange of chapitude.
The camera pans over to a beautiful ebony skinned women in neon ninja gear. This is Lily Lovesworth, she smells like a butt.

"I do not"

Go climb a wall of dicks, Lily.

"Sparky! I'm calling you, hey~!", Lily takes out a poisonous ninja knife and pokes Adena from behind without a hint of restraint, "HEY. HEY. I'M TRYING TO TALK TO YOU"

"-!", Adena, even though she spends the majority of the time ignoring the ninja, turns around with a scowl.

"Hey. You ever notice, when you're casting spells and shit, your hips start like, shaking and stuff?"

"That's to better conduct and channel energy for spells"

"Do you have any control over it?"

"Over what?"

"Heh", Lily snickers loudly and crudely, "Your hips"

"Stop talking to me."

The camera next pans toward the back, behind a cape with snake pauldrons, where a cyber punk Egyptian princess sits on top of a throne being towed by a group of elven slaves. Her purple eyes are encumbered by fatigued circles, signalling how much time she spends staying up all night browsing hentai on the internet, which is not proper princess behavior.

"Kakra", the princess blurts out her right hand's name, "I feel shooty. Fetch me my 1911A1"

A frizzy pink haired Dullahan wearing pink panther colored clothing, with a gash of turquoise mist leaking from her semi-connected neck, immediately stands before the princess in a salute. Her lips are thick, she probably had work done, nobody has lips that fine by heritage.

"YES! MY PERFECT PRINCESS!", Kakra shouts out as proudly as a subject could be, perhaps a little too happy. Like, perversely happy. Molestingly happy, maybe not. But there's definitely something there. She's a little too happy to receive orders from her princess. You know?
The perfect princess in question happens to be one among the next-in-line, vying for the Pharaoh's name with this quest, an Anubis girl by the name of Annette Ubisco. Which is a silly name. Because ANette UBISco. And that makes the name a pun. Not a good one though. But atleast it's not something you'd notice right away.

The red haired man with the fish ears and the dark skinned lancer in dragon armor walk in front of the princess's carrier, the right is actually a reverse trap Sea Bishop masquerading as a traveling priest to assist the party without feeling too awkward over conversation and possible pap smears. She goes by the name of Athryn Honeywell, a former princess of the Northern Sea. The left is some dude named Jojo or something, who knows, he's not important.

"Miss Annette, what exactly do you intend to shoot?", Athryn asks in that polite and boyish voice.

"Whatever intends to be shot", Annette brandishes a beautiful colt model pistol.

"Miss Annette, that is a unscrupulous dismissive answer. Please mind your surroundings and do not disturb the environment with gunfire"

"I wanna shoot something"

"Please, you must resist, ill requited attention is very much unwanted"

"...I never get a chance to shoot something back at the palace", Annette grumbles in a depressed tone.

"You shall not."

"...", Annette digs her knuckles into her pale face looking very bored, "And why wouldn't I?"

"It's not behavior befitting a princess", Athryn explains with a stern face. A stern freckled face. Red haired and freckled. Cute. And handsome. Girls and boys would probably fuck Athryn. I'd a Athryn. Wouldn't you an Athryn? You'd think people would be on to the fact that she's a reverse trap Sea Bishop. Because she probably smells fishy.
"Yeah, gunfire would be-", Jojo begins to speak.

"Audible sigh... Very well, Athryn", Annette points her pistol into the sky, "I will only fire upwards, that way I will not harm the forest"

"Did she just say 'audible sigh'-?"

"That also seems entirely unsafe for all parties involved"

"Yeah, that's no-", Jojo begins to talk again.

"FINE.", Annette twirls the pistol until she holds the barrel, "Kakra, holster my pistol for the time being. I'll use it for fishing later"

"RIGHT-O! PERFECT-O PRINCESS... uh... 'oh'..."



Annette, Zeke, Adena, Ossla, Lily, Athryn, Jojo, Kakra, Ivy. This is the fellowship, of the Super Bizarre Slimes.

Our heroes and not-so-heroes arrive upon the dense portion of the (Forest of Electricity! Sparkling Secotioid!), though many are still taken aback by sleep deprivation, dehydration, and chronic vogue posing.

"FUCK", Ivy bends her knees outwards and makes a box in front of her face with her thumbs, "WHY CAN'T I STOP THIS?"

"My perfect princess~", Kakra announces playfully with a sleeping fairy between her bosom, "We've finally arrived at our destination"

"Finally, we're here. God, that took what, like six months?", Ossla mentions off hand as she stretches her semi-flat chest.

"We would've gotten here faster if the princess didn't say she wanted to go back to the capital"

"I forgot my luggage"

"You went to pick up a team of elf servants back at the pyramid"

"I forgot my luggage"

"Are you talking about the elves or the bags the elves are carrying"

"I forgot my luggage"

"Princess, please"

"Kakra. Please. Luggage."
They will not be able to enter the Forest of Lightning from above, being that the electrical discharge would surely fry their flying transport. The forest's entrance is thick with the calming fog, a misty sort that shines with crystal ambiance. The sounds of nature muffles, the sound of a synthesizer calming playing the background, setting the peaceful yet unnerving atmosphere of this incandescent beauty.

"How're we supposed to go anywhere in this?"

"The forest is actually quite large, since we're on foot, and in the denser part, we'll need a ride", a cutesy leering voice with a hint of sleep fatigue emits from Kakra's breasts.

"Why are Kakra's breasts talking?", Ivy peeks over Zeke's snickering head.

"We brought that fairy with us, remember? The one that knows her way around here. We don't have a map or something", Lily explains with a sniff.

"Oh right", Ossla crosses her scaly arms and nods confidently, "Wait, seriously? A breast fairy!?"

"The Daddy Mulk River is just at the entrance, I believe the local populace runs a ferry that'll take you much further into the forest", Kakra's breasts light up as they speak.

"Hah. We're getting directions from a Dullahan's bosom, that's perfect", Lily coughs into her hand with a giggle.

"Climb a wall of dicks, Lily", Kakra's breasts flash like a lightning bug.

"This feels surreal", Kakra bluntly adds, completely straight faced in her execution.

"Well then, you heard the breasts", Annette crosses her arms and clacks her heel, "Let's go fishing"

And so, our party enters the Forest of Lightning.

Upon a few minutes of sheer uninterrupted walking, they come across a beautiful green and purple tinted river with shining robot piranhas jumping out of the depths and splashing into the surface.

"Swimming seems like a bad idea", Adena mentions to herself, incredibly deadpan.
They come across a flat lodge floating inside the river, tied aside by a piece of shoddy looking rope.

"Do we just hop on-?"

"WHYHELLOTHERE, OUTSIDERFELLERS", an oddly low baritone female voice breaks the silence.

"Ah, you must be the ferry master-", the party turns to meet the voice.

There's a goblin girl wearing a cowboy hat and suspenders, but that's not the eye catching part. Rather, she has a huge heaving chests for a girl her size. Like. Watermelons. Gazongas. Big fat cat tats. They look dangerous. They take up like 40% of her upper body. She's not even as tall as Zeke, who's like, 12. Or 18, if you go by censor laws. 21 in some countries.


"ISUREAMYOUFELLERS,IGOBYTHENAMEHEREOF'SHWING BOREGARD'", the goblin girl stumbles her words together in an odd dialect. Like... some kind of deformed Kenny Rogers., "Y'ALLWANNAGOUPCREAKHERE-AH?"

"W-What?", the party mutters as they double take then look back downwards at the goblin's chest, "WHOA"

"I've got a boner so complicated", Zeke mentions offhandedly.


"Did she just say her name is 'Shwing'?", Ivy rotates her befuddled look between the Gobling ferry master and the party.
"I think the goblin's telling us she'll send us upriver if we pay her", Athryn announces as she/he struggles to understand, "Miss Annette, perhaps you should reason with her"

"Capital idea", Annette walks over the faces of her elven servants and stands before the short and well endowed monster girl, "Listen here- WUUUUUU"

Annette struggles to put her phrasing into words, the oppai goblin's chest seems to bounce with no sense of gravitational belief. There's also the problem of Annette being a sheltered hikkimori the majority of her life, but she seems to forget that in regular intervals.



[] Offer her a ride on Ossla's back
[] Offer a sensual love making song sung by Jojo
[] Offer a belly dance by Adena
[] Offer her help for her abnormal heaving chest
[] Offer her Zeke's hand in marriage
[] Offer Blackjack
[] Wrap together a make-shift raft out of elven servants instead

Thread seems to autosage if the OP's not empty. Let's see if the subject field matters.
[x] Offer her a ride on Ossla's back
[x] Belly dance
>[] Offer her a ride on Ossla's back
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[X] Offer a belly dance by Adena
Yes. All of my Yes. I have never voted Yes so hard for anything before ever.

[x]Belly Dance
>[x] Wrap together a make-shift raft out of elven servants instead

Ah shitposter, how I have missed you.
[x] Wrap together a make-shift raft out of elven servants instead

Elves are good for two things. Decomposing into bones, and firewood.
Just saying, man. Never seen another quest have autosage issues like this one.
In any case, I'm not the one who hangs around. I just say my piece and leave.
>[x] Offer her help for her abnormal heaving chest
That can't be healthy.
That's wrong, there's a number of words that set off the autosage trigger in the original post. If you say one, the thread autosages.
[X] Offer a belly dance by Adena

This time, we're serious.
[x] Offer her help for her abnormal heaving chest
That has to mean immense back problems, I'm just imagining my sore back times ten.
Also, good to have you back.
[x] Offer her help for her abnormal heaving chest
>[X] Offer her help for her abnormal heaving chest

The poor thing must be suffering!
[X] Offer her help for her abnormal heaving chest

Tie breaker!
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Also, nice to see you back Bromont.
[x] Wrap together a make-shift raft out of elven servants instead
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[X] Offer her help for her abnormal heaving chest

"We will offer you help for your abnormally large chest"

"OHYEAH,HOWYOUGONNADOTHATNAH?", the goblin girl digs her hands into her hips, her breasts jiggle like jello.

Annette grabs Zeke by the shirt collar as he spaces out, drags him over behind the oppai goblin, and places his hands on her chest.

"Zeke, help the nice lady carry her groceries"

"Wha- No, Miss Annette, this is-!", the boy begins to protest as his cheeks turn red.

"Princess, that is a GROSS misuse of our-", Jojo's stern voice breaks the scene.

"Oh my...", Athryn covers her/his already partially covered mouth, blushing innocently in utter surprise.

"NOWWAITJUSTAMINUTEHERE", the large breasts goblin girl raises her hand up to the protesters.

The ferry master turns to the right, with Zeke's hands firmly holding up her chest. Then she casually turns to the left, with Zeke's hands still firmly holding up her chest. Zeke's face remains neutral, neither excited nor cursing his predicament.

"WELL,HOWDOYOULIKETHAT...", the goblin girl nods with amble relief, "KIDHEREDOESWHATBRASDON'T"

"Good, then it's an accordance", the princess extends her hand quite casually, "Let's shake jibblies on it"

And so, our bizarre individuals brought together by destiny begin their journey into the famed Forest of Lightning, a true transtechnological biological oddity.

The cover of the lodge floating ever so steadily on the river's rampant currents tints with grey and black triangles, like some sort of strange art project. There's a hint of vomit on the sidelines and the smell of alcohol apparent.

"Talk about a dump", Lily mentions offhandedly, having no self-control of her speech patterns.

"TRUEMENAH, DISHERFERRY'STHEONLYTHINGKEEPINGYAHFROMBEHINGROBOCHOMPFOODOOEY", the goblin girl continues to speak in that weird dialect, Zeke holding firmly her chesticles in place.

"This is much harder than it looks", the boy puts on a look of concentration, "My hands feel shaky.."
"Why do you speak so...", Kakra bites her tongue and changes the subject, "From what part of the forest do you come from, booby-rocket?"



"LOUISIANA,DEYDAHBOYS!", the goblin girl cheers as she pumps her fist into the air, Zeke desperately trying to maintain his grip.

"Louisiana... they the boys?", Annette repeats the words to herself with a hint of curiousness, "What's a Louisiana? And why does it sound like it condones incestrial relationships?"

"PRINCESS! PRINCESS! HELP!", indentured elven servants wave to the princess on the side of the lodge.

"What now...?"


"You can swim, can't you?"


"Oh relax, you're not people, those fish only eat men", Annette casually turns back to her right hand Kakra, "Make sure my luggage isn't thrown out for extra room, and for the love of Ra, let's avoid this 'Louisiana' place at all costs"

"No please-". Athryn interjects into the conversation, "I'll find some room for the elven kind, there's no need for loss of precious life"

"SIR ATHRYN!", the elven girl servants squeal in unhealthy delight, their eyes swelling with tears, "YOU'RE SUCH A PINNACLE OF HUMANITY! AND SO HANDSOME TOO! HE IS GOD! SUCH A MANLY MAN!"

"I am not a... no nevermind, excuse me", Athryn massages her/his temples.

And so, with everyone on board, the party begins their journey down the Daddy Mulk River. Oddly enough, the lodge seems to hold together rather well, experiencing little to no turbulence.

"Is 'Daddy Mulk' the name of a tree or something? It sounds like an odd choice of words", Ivy asks to the ferrymaster goblin as she admires the misty scenery.


"That so...?", the Dhampir begins to play with her fangs, massaging them calmly with her tongue.
Ossla sits cross legged in the middle of the lodge, getting jittery from the sheer lack of excitement. She glances over at the boy for a fraction of a second, then lights up with an idea.

"Oi, Zeke", Ossla rolls over to the boy, still attached to the Ferrymaster.

"Huh-? Yes-? What is it, Miss Ossla?", the boy glances over at the dragon girl, his curiosity peeked.

"Alright, wanna see something cool?"


"Alright, check this out!"

Ossla opens her blue lipped mouth and sticks her tongue out in a unrestrained crude fashion. A little green spark ignites on the very tip of her tongue, a small flame appears and dances around the tip of her tongue.

"Raliraliraliralirali", Ossla exclaims as she dances her tongue around her mouth, the little flame circulating and gyrating whichever way she moves, but it stays on in perfect balance.

"Whoa!", Zeke's eyes light up with childish glee, "That's so cool!"

"I know, right? Imagine what ELSE I could do with me tongue, heh heh", Ossla giggles with a slight perverse ring to it.

"Oh totally! Hahaha"






"...So like, touch the tip of your nose and stuff?"

"Well- that's not what I was talking about"

"Huh? What were you talking about"

"You know... let's just drop the subject"

Lily lies on the other side of the lodge on hey side, noticing this event taking place. Without getting up, she hops her body from the flooring, and using sheer technique, lands straight back on her side as soon as she reaches the two on the opposite side of the lodge.

"Sup', whatcha guys talking about?"

"Ossla was doing something cool with fire from her mouth", Zeke explains as soon as the ninja girl asks.

"Oh yeeeah...?", Lily pierces the dragon girl's eyes with her own crazed blue eyes, "Say, scaly, how come I never see you actually breathing fire on bad guys and stuff?"
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"Never had the need to", the flat chested dragon girl crosses her arms around her flat chest, did I mention she didn't have any tits. Flaaaaaaat.

"You breathed fire a couple times by mistake, so you CAN shoot stuff out, right?", Lily gets uncomfortably close to the dragon girl's face, "Riiiiight?"

"Of COURSE I can"

"Then let's see it"

"Fine, you asked for it!"

Ossla turns to the side of the boat, where nothing would catch fire except maybe some trees, but who cares about trees? Certainly not Vikings. Don't you want to be just like the Vikings? Vikings were so cool.

"...Paaaah...", Ossla opens her mouth and gasps at the open air.

"We're waiting"

"...", Ossla takes a deeper breath and opens her mouth once more, "Paaaaaaaaah..."

...But nothing comes out.

"Hmmm~?", Lily gives the dragon girl a very mischievous smile.

"...Fine.", Ossla sticks her finger claw inside her mouth, like a person does to manually induce puking, and stimulates the gag reflex, "PAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!"


An unhealthy amount of green flame vomit emits forth, covering the side of the boat in a mist of green emerald flames.

"KUUURRUUU!", Zeke yells out in deep fascination.

"THERE!", Ossla turns to the ninja girl, clearly out of breath, "TAKE THAT!"

"...Did you just vomit fire?"

"I... I have performance anxiety...?"

"You can't spit fire on command, can you? HAHAHAHA, wow, that's pretty low for a dragon, don'tcha think?"

"----", Ossla narrows her gaze in indictment, "Go climb a wall of dicks, Lily"
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The misty fog up around the forest seems to lift the further you sink into the forest. The plant life and trees curve and sink in abnormally strange ways, bits of bark are clawed off to reveal circuitry and mechanical insides. As a duo of hanging lamp trees rise overhead, something becomes clear in the horizon.

"HEYWENEARINGAFORKINTHERIVERTHERE", the goblin ferrymaster with the rubber baby buggy bumpers announces to the party.

There is indeed a fork in the river, splitting off into two separate paths. To the right, in the distance, lies a giant... a giant...

To the right, is a giant neon octopus the size of a mountain, it doesn't appear to be alive but merely for decoration. To the left there seems to be a more... Romansh ruinous plain. A partially submerged area full of pastel roman pillars and ruins covered with age, long forgotten by the world.

Which way will you go?

[] The Giant Neon Octopus
[] The Lightning Forest Columns
>[x] The Giant Neon Octopus
Columns are columns, but a giant neon octopus is a giant neon octopus.
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>[x] The Giant Neon Octopus
[X] lightning forest

Let's get dangerous!

BTW, Bromont, how how's it hanging?
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A little to the left. How are you this fine day, Anon?
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>[X] The Giant Neon Octopus
>[x] The Giant Neon Octopus
Why are there still 1911s in the future?

Shouldn't it be in a museum?
IIRC Annette collects guns. She had that one that made it rain as well.
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I'm alright.

Patiently waiting for Shantae 1/2 and you vn.
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>[X] The Giant Neon Octopus

>already a 110 year old design
>still favored by plenty of private and military users
If it ain't broke, don't fix it. Also it's been hinted in prior threads that Annette is a hikki 20th century arms collector (due to her just having a closet full of guns that pile on top of kakra when opened).

A Mauser K98 if I remember correctly. I bet she spends her time on the future equivalent of /k/.
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Haha, I sure have been working on it a long time, haven't I?

Also, friendly reminder, the kickstarter for Shantae's new game only has a few days left to go. It'd be super nice if you guys had any spare change to donate. Virt's a pretty rad musician.
Ain't denying that the 1911 is one hell of a gun despit its age.

But, in a future with lasers, super powerful lightweight armor, EDIBLE lasers, ect. Guns just seem kind of useless.
I have donated.

Donated enough for the shirt and the transformation idea vote.

I can not be the only one who thinks Shantae looks like Leela with darker skin and two eyes.
>[] The Lightning Forest Columns
lift column. dot coms.
[X] The Giant Neon Octopus

"Why don't we ask Kakra's chest fairy which direction gets us there faster?", Ivy's common sense should be common logic.

"Hmm? Oh yes. That sounds stupidly obvious", Annette snaps to as she admires the scenery, "Kakra, come"

"I'll need two fingers for that, Princess!", Kakra happily slides over to her princess's side.

Annette ignores the Dullahan's words and immediately reaches into her cleavage. She pulls out a familiar light haired, milky brown skinned fairy girl in fancy white fairy clothing.

"Niia. Wake up.", Annette politely shakes her fairy friend.

"Mmm...", the fairy girl dreary reopens her eyes, "Hiii~..."

Annette points the fairy at the upcoming fork in the river, hoping to bring the miniature girl back to the reality of the situation.

"Oh dear, we're at the fork already!?", Niia jerks around in Annette's grip in a clear panic.

"Is this bad?"

"Listen to me, this is very important", Niia looks up the princess with her beautiful face, thanks in no doubt to plenty of beauty sleep, "You must follow my instructions to a T"

"Yes yes, of course. Now which way do we go?"

"You must, absolutely, positively, NOT go-", as Niia points up from the princess's hand, her body goes limp and her mouth opens wider, a loud and nasally snore fills the tense air, "...Zzzzzz"

"---", Annette's Anubis ears spring out from beneath her neatly combed hair out of sheer frustration, "Great, magical, thanks. Let's goooo... uh... to the RIGHT"

"IF'NTHATBETHEWAYY'ALLWANTIT", the ferrymaster operates the lodge to swing it one side in a very smooth ride. Not one bit of discourse or reservation.

The ferry crosses rightward in the fork, setting the course for the giant neon octopus in the horizon. Nobody seems to have any objections, though they are starting to wonder why they brought a narcoleptic fairy girl along when she does nothing but fall asleep in Kakra's Kakras.
Adena stands at the very tip center point, arms at her side, watching the weird pastel mesh of colors resembling plant-life and nature pass on by. She removes her hood, letting her long sexy green lay to one side of her shoulders. The air smells strangely crisp and natural for such an unnatural location, she thinks to herself. That giant structure coming up ahead, however, brings by a feint hint of nostalgia over her career as a mid-boss for would-be heroes and adventurers.

"You know, I'm used to all sorts of weird and stupidly eccentric locations, most ran by complete fools, but who in their right mind would create such a garish landscape?"

"Why do you say a think like that, Sparky?", Jojo takes a couple steps forward dramatically despite nothing dramatic happening.

"You'd have to be some sort of fool to believe it's a REAL octopus, but I can't imagine how someone could build something so... strange. A clusterfuck of colors and patterns like that, if it were designed purposely, the people involved are most like hedonists"

The party nears the giant octopus shaped structure, lights melting into glowing abyss. The light could blind a space ship in orbit, it's quite a sensory overload given physical form. Blue neon lights twist and speckle across the individual legs and green neon glow resides from the underside. A metal red glow emits from the dark recesses of what would appear to be eye socket holes.

The party immediately equips whatever item in their inventory to help block the bright lights. Adena puts her hood back on, Jojo's eyes are artificial, Zeke equips a pair of goggles, Ivy puts on a Vampire Hunter D-like hat, Annette slips on a pair of stylish sunglasses, Kakra as well, Ossla grits her teeth and bares the light, Lily looks around at everyone equipping things and scoffs at her limited inventory space.

...Because it's hard to carry extra supplies in a skin-tight bodysuit.

There's an odd humming noise emitting from the area around the party. An artificial sort of humming noise, like that of a cheap hotel room light or an active air conditioner unit.

"Oh hey, look at that!", Ivy announces to the party as she points off to the side.

"Hmm...?", Adena swings her hips around to see.

On the sidelines of the river, a great and dense forest of mushroom and fungus awaits. With little lines of glowing translucent apparel hanging idly from the bulbous shapes, like swinging vines. The giant mushrooms take form in varying shades of gleaming colors woven and twisted with patterns of shapes embedded on the top portion. From simple shapes of hearts and stars to more complicated formations, then weave together among each individual fungi like a tapestry of dreams.

"Ah. The Sparkling Secotioid!", Ossla announces with a fair amount of happy glee, "Fantastic! I never thought I'd ever get to see one!"

"Excuse me, what are those...?", Zeke asks with a polite tone of voice.

The fairy still being held tightly by Annette suddenly snaps to and assumes a tourist guide like pose.

"Why, those are Mutated Secotioids", Niia explains in her almost foreign accent, "They conduct the electricity that powers the entire artificial part of the forest. You see, when lightning strikes, the rounded portion adsorbs the energy like a conduit. That's also why they glow so brightly, they're the only things holding this forest together"


The party only now notices the sky above, having been shrouded by the thick fog beforehand. It's a dark and ghastly overshadow with bits of electric currents flashing throughout the clouds, like a stream of lightning sparks spread throughout in abnormal increments. A bolt of lightning strikes a secotioid nearby, and is immediately sucked inside like a vacuum. The thunder is muffled, but still audible.
"Well, I don't know", Ossla puffs up her cheeks with a nod, "That's bretty cool guys"

"Bretty cool", Ivy taps the side of her cheek.

"Yeah, bretty cool", Kakra puffs up her cheeks as well and joins in.

"Pretty nifty, indeed", Athryn ruins it, though she/he probably didn't understand why.


There's another foreign sound, this one much more peculiar than the rest?

It sounds like.. sounds like...

"What IS that?", Annette looks from river bank to river bank, trying to pinpoint the source.


"No, not ABAJ"

"UHOH", the oppai goblin girl voices her dismay out loud.

"What do you mean, uh oh?"

"Think she means ABAJ"

"Shut up"

The sound.. it's whirring.. sorta like...

It's whiny... and loud... but it sounds musical...

Some sort of... instrument?

"Is that an electric guitar", one of the elven slaves blurts out.

"An electric guitar? Why are we hearing an electric guitar?", Annette spins around, obviously getting nervous.

"Are the fungi produces that?", Adena bites her thumb in confusion.

"...", Zeke looks up into the sky with his usual neutral expression, "Oh hey, I think I know what that is-"

A ferocious looking harpy clad in yellow and blue feathers, skimpy lightning bolt spandex, and a miniskirt swoops down and pries Zeke away from the oppai goblin's bosom. She digs her strong black talons into the boys shoulders and lifts him off as if he weighed nothing.

"AH SHIT!", Zeke yells out as he's carried off, "THIS IS LIKE THE SECOND TIME THAT'S HAPPENED... THIS WEEK!"

"AH-! ZEKE!", Ossla yells out in horror as she tries to swipe at the harpy.

"KYAAA HAAAA HAAA!", the sound of electric guitars whirring in the breeze fill the sky as the harpy laughs to her own delight.

A second, third, forth, an entire group of harpies clad in ferocious clothing, lightning bolt symbols, and black leather come into focus as they circle around above.

They all possess blonde and blue hair, matching their exotically aggressive feathers. They look unnatural, like no other bird girl you've seen before. But above all else, they look metal.

"Ossla, you have wings, fly after them and grab Zeke", Lily mentions to the dragon girl, poking fun at her.

"...", Ossla, ignoring the way the ninja put it, tries desperately to flap her little wings and give flight, only to fall flat on her ass.

"Swing and a miss"

"ADENA!", the blue dragon girl quickly crawls to the sorceress, "STOP THEM!"

"Don't shout, I'm trying", Adena spreads her fingers apart and begins to shake her hips like a belly dancer.


Adena snaps her fingers to and fro, thick green lightning shooting from her fingers like a whip. As Adena's lightning strikes them, they all air guitar in the sky. The lightning bolt strikes them in succession, connecting them all as one in some sort of sky connect-the-dots. However, they shrug it off as if it were nothing.

"Ah. Yeah. That would make sense.", Adena palms the side of her head in frustration.

"What is it?", Annette doesn't take her gaze off the sky monsters.

"Thunder Birds. Who else would freely fly around here when the sky's full of millions and millions of volts"
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"HEY! CHECK OUT WHAT I FOUND!", the harpy carrying the boy shows him off, "FUCKING FABBO, RIGHT SIS?"

"FUCK YEAH, MY VAG'S DRYER THAN DEATH VALLEY. WE'RE EATING GO~OD TONIGHT!", a side ponytail'd Thunder Bird proclaims.

"FUCKING FABBO!", a very long haired Thunder Bird with a pierced lip spreads her wings merrily.

"LET US GIVE THANKS TO THE GOD OF ROCK'N'ROLL FOR THIS BOUNTY!", a brown skinned Thunder Bird proclaims with permanent carnivorous glee.


They all air guitar in the sky, the sound of rich electric guitars hit the scene with each flap of their individual wings. Merely flying literally lets loose the sound of electric guitar.

"Um.. girls?", Zeke begins to speak to the harpies nicely, "Could you set me back down-? Pretty please?"

"SEX TOYS DON'T SPEAK, HUMAN", the side ponytail'd Thunder Bird proclaims.



"That sounds really... unsanitary", Zeke mentions with sadness in his eyes.

"CUT THE CRAP KID, WE DON'T CARE HOW YOU FEEL. YOU'RE NOTHING MORE THAN OUR CATCH OF THE DAY-", the Thunder Bird stops her boasting as soon as she catches a good look at the boy.

"PLEASE? Pretty please with sugar on top?", Zeke pleads once again.


"Hey, the fuck's wrong with you?", the Thunder Bird with the long hair exclaims.

"Look at him"


"Look at this kid", the harpy carrying Zeke touches the boy's hair, "Doesn't he look familiar?"


"Naw, LOOK at him closer. Look. His hair.", the harpy motions at the boy's oddly colored head, "It's the SAME COLOR AS OURS!"


"Now that you mention it, he DOES look a bit like us"

"RIGHT!? Maybe we're from the same bloodline or something!"
"Think the Queen has a lost little brother or son?"

"How messed up would that be? We were about to fuck him!"

"I'm alright with brother fucking, why aren't you?"

"No, guys, look, we should take him back to the Queen. Maybe he's part of the clan!"

"Duuuuuude, that would be so surreal. Let's do it!"

"HELL YEAH!", the Thunder Birds lightning five in the sky.

The harpies make off with Zeke.

The party feels mixed. remaining stunned and taken back by the sudden attack, but mainly confused by the entire way that unfolded.

"It's like...", Jojo shakes his head trying not to laugh, "It's like a reverse stereotype."

"Reverse stereotype...?", Kakra turns to the lancer.

"Yeah. Like, when the princess is kidnapped and you have to rescue her in shit. Only, it's a dude, this time"

"It's a story about monster girls, of COURSE the DUDE would be the one who needs rescuing"

"GUYS!", Ossla yells out all jittery and panicking, "WE NEED TO SAVE HIM! HURRY!"

"Jojo, where are they heading?", Annette kicks the dragon lancer's back leg.

"----Into the eye sockets", the man explains as he zooms in with her false eyes.

"Well, we're passing on by anyway, so it won't be that much of a detour"
"WHY AREN'T WE MOVING FASTER! THEY COULD BE HURTING HIM!", the blue dragon woman balls up and cries.

"He's still up there you know. All you gotta do to save him is fly-", Lily crosses her thumbs and making a wing gesture with her hands.


Ossla grabs the ninja girl by the breast, "GO. CLIMB. A WALL OF DICKS. LILY"

"Please, fighting amongst ourselves is counterproductive right now. Cut it out at once", Athryn stands firmly between the two girls.

"OH, SIR ATHRYN! YOU'RE SO BRAVE!", elf girls swarm around the clothed Sea Bishop.

"Please...", the red haired reverse trap looks wry and worn down by the elf girls wanting stares, "Please stop."

"Yeah, I wouldn't worry, he seems to be enjoying himself", Jojo explains as he watches the boy being carried into the neon octopus.

"I SEE LONDON, I SEE FRANCE-! OH GOD, YOU'RE NOT WEARING UNDERWEAR!", Zeke yells off in the horizon.

"...Imissmyhumanbra", the oppai goblin mentions offhanded.

"Relax, we'll get there in no time"

And so our party arrives at the entrance of the giant neon octopus structure.

"I really, really wanna slide down one of these octo-legs", Ivy mentions as everyone enters the area.

There is a long elongated velvet staircase at the entrance of the octopus, which leads straight up inside.It's littered with skulls, used condoms, egg shells, and harpy feathers.

"The subordinates are idiots, but Harpy Queens are quick to reason and negotiation", Annette explains as she leads the party forward.

They follow the staircase inside the giant neon octopus, it begins to spiral around inside for some reason or another. It's pretty confusing. But sooner rather than later, our bizarre friends enter the royal Thunder Bird throne room.

...Which is a metal of fuck throne room with pinball and toy football tables.

There's also a llama in the corner.

"What...", the group trails off at the sight of the creature.
"WHO DARES ENTER THE DOMAIN OF METAL!?", the Harpy Queen roars out as if she were speaking through a megaphone.

Sitting on a highly decorative rock and roll throne, behind a wall of nonlethal electricity, sitting unfazed as if she were Nikola Tessla performing an amazing feature of power, a Thunder Bird Queen makes an appearance.

...She kinda looks like an aging rock star.

"We've come for the boy", Annette proclaims as she steps forward.


The Queen of Harpies electrocutes the elf servant girl standing closest to Annette viciously.

"AAHHHHHH", the elf girl screams in pain.

"Look, we saw your subordinates carry him inside here-"


The Queen of Harpies electrocutes the same elven servant girl.


"Would you stop that?"

"DO NOT ORDER ME AROUND---!?", the Harpy Queen shoots lightning into the elf harder, "YAAAH YAAH YAAH YAAAAAH"

"PLEASESTOPTALKING,PLEASESTOPTALKING!", the elf girl pleads out, she smells like burnt toast.

"...", Annette crosses her arms as she glares at the Queen.

"...", the Queen looks to Annette and sighs, "Oh alright, fine. I'll stop doing that"

The elf girl servants in the party huddle around Athryn, scared of being electrocuted at once. Though Athryn doesn't seem to care anymore if that happens.

"So you wish to have your 'boy' back?", the Queen begins to speak plainly to the princess.

"Yes, we'll need him"

"Too bad, you can't have him"

"Why not?"

"Because he bares the mark of the Thunder Bird. Thus he is part of the family. And I am VERY possessive of my kin"
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"Zeke.. is not..."

"Dude, what?", Ivy looks like a confused stoner.

"...Why is an Anubis and... a strange mishmash of characters traveling through my forest anyway?"

[] Tell her you're heading to the Alruane Queen's palace for Bizarre Slime, maybe the truth will help
[] Tell her you'd be willing to make a person trade for the boy
[] Threaten the Harpy Queen (and electrocute an elf)
[] Offer her the spoils of past adventures
[] Well, tough luck, guess the kid's a lost cause
[] Shoot the Thunder Bird Queen with a squirt gun
[] Use Lily
Wow, so many options, so many ways I can see it going bad... Going to have to think on this one jeemy.
>[] Shoot the Thunder Bird Queen with a squirt gun
[X] Tell her you're heading to the Alruane Queen's palace for Bizarre Slime, maybe the truth will helpu
[X] Use Lily

Use those ninja skills to replace the boy with an elf. The harpy won't know the difference.
[x] Tell her the truth
If all else fails, challenge them to a guitar duel
>[x] Tell her you're heading to the Alruane Queen's palace for Bizarre Slime, maybe the truth will help
The truth will not help.
[X] Tell her you're heading to the Alraune Queen's palace for Bizarre Slime, maybe the truth will help

"We're on our way to the Alraune Queen's palace, actually.", Annette tells the aging thunder bird queen the honest truth.

"Madam Vesperi? The fuck you want with that frenchie?", asks the queen harpy very bluntly.

"She has a... she has something we wish to acquire"

"Would that 'something' happen to be a very certain 'slime-like' substance?"

"...Well, I don't know, that could mean a wide variety of things"

"Bizarre Slime, doom and gloom girl, Bizarre Slime"

"How do you know about-?", Kakra interjects from the princess's side, a look of confusion written all over her face.

"Bwahaha, you dumb cityfolk, word gets around faster than you realize", the harpy queen begins to laugh out boastfully, "Maybe you should've conducted yourself better, eh? Real quiet-like, eh? The element of surprise is above you, eh?"

Annette's stance changes the moment the Harpy Queen calls her' doom and gloom girl', as if a trigger switches inside her that clouds her better judgement.

"Oh my", Annette returns the Queen's vigorous words with her sullen gloomy face, "You talk so happily, without a care in the world. Are you trying to make this ever-so-morose woman unhappy?"

"Say what, now?", the queen returns the stare, slightly off put by the princess's shift in mood.

"If you're aware of our exploits, then you'll know we don't take kindly to people who impede our journey. I beat an immortal Egyptian pharaoh to death with fists made of sand"

"I heard a bullet killed him, not your fists"

"It's not my fists you should worry about", Annette crosses her fingers and digs her chin in, "I am but a simple woman of hexes and curses, but there is a certain curse I carry with me everywhere I go. Ra's fists follow me, every step of the way, and I'm the only thing standing in it's way of beating you to death"
File deleted.
"Hah, don't play me for some sort of cowardly bitch, ya downbeat freak. You do that and you'll never see your little boyfriend again"

"Boyfriend? Huh.. wait no... it's not like that-", Anny takes an off balanced step forward.

Adena immediately steps forth and pushes the princess back, "Please, allow me."

"Who the fuck are you?"

"Yes, we're on our way to steal from the Alraune Queen. What is she to you?"

"What do you mean, broccoli hair?"

"What I mean is, is she your ruler-?"

"Fuck no, I rule my own shit. WE rule our own shit. WE RUN THIS SHIT!", the thunder bird queen raises her glorious wings in celebration.

"And you are...?"

"Queen Fira. And you-?"

"Fira? The ex rock star...?", the elven servants mutter amongst themselves.

"Kakra, the princess's right hand"

"...WHAT", the dullahan next to the princess immediately stiffs up.

"I'm a hardcore lesbian, but I do enjoy a good spitroasting"


"Please, don't let my lofty exterior delude you, I enjoy ass play intensively and vigorously", Adena nods to herself quite solemnly, "Though, nothing quite beats a good fisting"

"Such... disgusting insolence... we will remember your name knave-!"

"H- WAIT!", Kakra yells out in protest.

"Remember it all you want, we are still at a impasse"

"We are not. We've taken a liking to your... your... what did you say his name was?"

"Poon Tank McFrank. Do not worry if at first he denies it, that is his true name"

"We will keep your 'Poon Tank' and you will leave. This is my decree, and as ruler, it will be followed"

"But wait, you just said you had no affiliation with the Alraune Queen"

"I did-?"

"You're on bad terms, aren't you? Given this garish lair... Are you perhaps... rebelling against her highness in your own way?"

"Good guess, you're sorta correct", Fira scratches her chin with her talon, 'Yeah."

[] Offer to bring the Queen's head
[] Offer to openly prank the Queen
[] Offer to steal Queen's royal necter
[] Offer to steal the Queen's Royal Bra
>[] Offer to openly prank the Queen
>[x] Offer to steal the Queen's Royal Bra
Frosted bumps
We counting the votes on foolz too?
Why would you run a quest on foolz when you took the time to make a thread for it? Thats retarded.
>[] Offer to bring the Queen's head
Some people can't access 4chan for whatever reason and can't vote on 4chan.
Then why even run it here? Just use anonkun or something
>[x] Offer to openly prank the Queen
>[] Offer to bring the Queen's head
pg9 bump
[X] Offer to bring the Queen's head
>[X] Offer to bring the Queen's head
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Sure are quick to killing. But we can kill the plant queen, super hard, if you want.
I don't want. Why is everyone voting for killing her? We've never even met her. She might be a really awesome person.

[X] Prank the queen
Absolutely kill.
Death to leafbitch
[X] Offer to openly prank the Queen

I thought stealing her bra would've been more fun but /tg/ seems to want to go full MurderHobo tonight.
Oh cool, this is back

[x] Offer to steal Queen's royal necter
[x] Offer to openly prank the Queen

We don't have to vote for just one, right?
[X] Offer to openly prank the Queen

"Tell me, just how much do you like this... Alraune Queen?"

"I think she's a stuck-up french bitch, I wouldn't lose sleep if something bad happened to her, if that's what you're asking", Fira shoots the sorceress a giddy glance.

"Stuck up, you say?"

"Without a fricken doubt. She thinks she saved the forest and shit just by existing. All she does is dance around in her gay little green house tower in her gay little disco town. She does that little grammatical correction thing where she corrects yer mistakes out loud. Fuck, if I don't wanna speak good, it's none of her fricken concern.", the harpy queen takes a swig of alcohol with her talon, "Pisses me off..."

"A thought occurs, violence rarely affects those types the way you want it to"

"Huh? I don't know about that. If I saw her getting whipped or slapped, I'd be pretty happy"



"If you wish to really crawl underneath her green skin, you should embarrass her. Embarrass her more than she's possibly been embarrassed before in her life. You should- No, why don't you allow us to prank the Plant Queen?", Adena flashes the bird girl a look, one of conniving nature.

"I see... so you propose to accomplish this... in return for your boy?"

"Of course, you have our word. Now, if you would be so kind as to hand him over-"

"I'm afraid that's out of the question"

"...Excuse me?"

"Embarrass the princess and... bring proof of it. Then I'll give you back your precious boy servant"

"...Not ruined for marriage, I hope?"

"You ask a lot"

"I'd like to avoid psychologically scarring the child any further-", Adena exclaims in her usual tone, though it sounds uncharacteristically not right.

"Huh, didn't think Sparky cared about anybody else but herself", Lily mentions as she relaxes both arms around the back of her head.

"I agree wholeheartedly", Athryn interjects very earnestly.

"That makes three", Ossla mentions very casually.
"...", Jojo looks around the crowd unamused, "Oh, I SEE how the fuck it is. Just because you like the kid, you don't give a shit if I get molested by giants, but if anything of the sort happened to him, it'd be the end of the world. You bitches are cockblockers"

"We thought you and Big Bertha were an item, quite frankly", Adena mentions in her usual mocking tone.

"The bruises DID look like love taps", merrily states the ninja woman, "I miss the amazon tribe, those chicks had some sick clothing style"

"...", Lancer quiets down, grumbling beneath his breath.

"VERY WELL!", Fira, the Thunder Bird Queen, spreads her wings like a typical decree-like gesture, "You have my word, and my word is law. If you embarrass the Queen majorly and record proof of it, I shall relinquish Poon Tank back to you, untouched. However, if you fail, the consequences will be DIRE"

"Fair enough, lets shake on it", Adena opens her hand.


The thunder bird spreads her wings, sending another set of lightning bolts into the same sizzling elf nearby.


"Alright alright, we're moving, jeez"

As the party motions to leave, Ivy, the wrestling Dhampir, raises her hand to ask a question.

"Hey, could we use the octopus's legs as slides?"

"No.", the queen shoots her down almost immediately.

"...I understand."

As the party walks down the red velvet steps, they begin to talk amongst themselves the consequences of everything that's happened... while Ivy slides down a nearby neon octopus leg in the background.

"So, Adena, you have a plan?", Annette opens up to the sorceress.

"...", the green haired former villainous simply shrugs her shoulders.
>6 for pranking
>4 for beheading
We can revote again, if you want. Makes no difference to me, either way.
Just stick with the pranking
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Next shot is of Zeke sitting at a harpy dinner table, wearing the exact same outfit as the Thunderbirds, lightning bolt shaped cleavage hiders and all. Inappropriate drawn-on tattoos scattered across his skin.

"Oh Zeke... what did you get yourself into this time", the boy whispers to himself as he looks down.

"This fucking meat is raw as shit-!", a harpy with drill hair, the top portion being blonde while the bottom portion being blue, gestures over at the shota, "Oi, servant boy, take this back into the kitchen"

"You're made of lightning, ya dumb broad, just electrocute it if ya wanna cook it", a short haired harpy with earrings cackles out.

"Microwaved food ain't my idea of a decent meal. I prefer my meat like I prefer my men, slowly roasting over an open flame"

"Kya kha, as if any dude would wanna get with a brad with a forehead as big as yours. You could land a fricken blimp on that thing"

"Hmph, better than being a walking, talking stick figure", the harpy shoots her sister a look of sheer hatred, "String beans"

"Girls girls", a third harpy with a sharp looking nose interrupts the two, "You're both just terrible. A couple of nobodies who get mad over trivial shit like a couple of shitflinging children. So immature"

"Says the girl who pisses herself drunk last Christmas"


The Thunderbirds begin to motion to claw one another's eyes out, thinking fast, the boy seeks to diffuse the situation. Zeke tugs on the shorts of the first harpy, very weakly.

"Um.. excuse me.."

"Huh? My meat's not gonna cook itself, get fucking going or I'll clock ya-"

"I think your forehead is just fine, miss"

"-The fuck you just say to me, boy?", the harpy jolts completely to the boy, eyes full of rage.

"And you, miss-", Zeke points to the second harpy, "I think you're just lovely the way you are. Nobody cares if you're too skinny or too fat, it's what's on the inside that counts"
"...Of all the corny bullshit-!", the second harpy's eyes sharpen with rage.

"And finally, you, miss-", Zeke points to the third harpy connected to the conversation, "We all do embarrassing things throughout our life, and yes it sucks, but humor is the spice of life. If nothing wrong ever happened and everything was perfect all the time, the world would be a very dull place!"

"...Why you little-!"

The three harpies, alongside the rest of the dinner table, give their undivided attention to the boy with the same hair color as theirs. It doesn't look like her diffused the situation, if anything, he's made it worse-!

"...", Zeke lets out an audible gulp.

"You little...", the first harpy begins to cackle menacingly, "Well, would you look at that? This little shrimp thinks he's some sort of sweet talker?"

"Absolutely embarrassing", the second harpy laughs under her breath.

"Such a pitiful sight", the third harpy mentions as she sips her tea.

"Oi, servant boy", the first harpy's face comes uncomfortably close, "Get the fuck out of here before we fuck you up. Understood?"

"Yes... mam?"

The lightning harpy releases the boy, and goes back to eating from the dinner table as if nothing had happened. With the raw meat in hand, Zeke shrugs off the whole experience as a failure and heads off to cook it for the Thunderbirds.

As the night draws near, Zeke finds himself a spare harpy chamber to rest in. Although it's basically just a nest disguised as a simple bed, he welcomes to reprieve from the awful bullying those harpy girls put him through today.


The door to the creaks open rather ominously, the sound of two separate pairs of talons clacking against the metallic flooring enters the area.

"Eh-?", Zeke looks of very drowsily, "I must apologize, but this bedroom is taken-"


The harpy girl with the drills from before immediately swoops into the bed atop the unsuspecting boy.

"I know it is~", the thunder bird proclaims as she looks to the boy with hungry eyes.
"M-Miss... um... you're the harpy who didn't like the raw meat-"

"Oh no, I enjoy raw meat most of all", the monster girl whispers closer as she narrows in.

"Hey! Wait! What are you doing?"

"Uh. Well... nobody's ever really said anything nice to me before", the thunder bird explains with a blush rising across her face, "I couldn't say that before without saving face, so um... here I am"

"Oh. You're... welcome?"

"Mhm...", the harpy begins to strip, "My chest is so shockingly hot right now! I think I might be in love with you-!"

"That's.. nice"

"ISN'T IT!?", the lightning harpy eyes the boy with hungrier eyes, "You love me too, don't you?"

"Not... really-"

"Oi, boy!", the second harpy enters the room in a daze, "I-I have a confession to give ya. Look, I ain't so good with words, but I think it may be love at first sight-"

...The second harpy stops the moment she notices the first on top of Zeke.

"OH... HELL NO!"

"The fuck're you doing here? Acting all gay and shit, get out of here ya dumb fuck"

"I could be asking you the same fucking thing, you harlot-!"


"Mister human...", and now the third harpy from earlier today enters the room, "Nobody's ever said anything that sweet to me before..."

She also immediately stops as she notices the first two at one another's throats.

"Oh, I see you're busy, I'll come back later-"

The three harpy girls begin to caw at one another fiercely. They begin to circle around the room, maintaining distance as if they were in some sort of knife fight.

"CAW... C-CAW!"

"I... I just wanted some rest..", Zeke whispers to himself, his eyes going bloodshot.
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The Thunderbird Queen enters the room, followed by the rest of the horde, curious as to what is causing the racket.

"What in the name of-", Fira looks around at the feuding lovesick harpies, "What ARE you doing?"

"CAW!", the first points to the second.
"CAW-CAW!", the second points to the third.
"BAH CAW!", the third points to the other two.

"Good lord", Fira averts her gaze back to the boy, "His swagger is uncontrollable-?!"

"What? No, I don't have anything to do with this-"



"No! Please! Just let me fucking rest you bitch!", Zeke yells out in anger as he's swept away by two separate harpy twins.

-Zeke is taken down below the Neon Octopus, and inside an elaborate looking dungeon-

"OOF!", Zeke grunts as he's thrown inside a prison cell.



"I HOPE YOU GET CRAB GIRLS IN YOUR PRIVATE PARTS, YOU GODDAMN BIRD BRAINS!", Zeke screams as he rumbles the iron bars.

The harpies pay him no mind as they exit the area, leaving him alone in his fate, with no certain possibility that he'll ever even seen the light of day again. Zeke lets go of the iron bars, letting out an even more exasperated sigh. But. With every negative, there is a positive. Atleast now, he'll be able to rest easily-



There's a blue skinned woman heavily chained up inside the same prison cell, she has a heart-shaped eyepatch over one eye, and one very pretty red demon eye on the other. There's bondage-like apparal locked around her thick body, and a skull emblemed mouth restraint keeping her from speaking.

"A-A... A succubus?"

[] Help her out of those chained restraints
[] Loosen her mouth restraints and talk with her before you do anything drastic
[] Throw a blanket over her face and ignore her
[] Politely tell the monster girl you want nothing to do with her and look for a way out
>[x] Loosen her mouth restraints and talk with her before you do anything drastic
[] Loosen her mouth restraints and talk with her before you do anything drastic

[x] loosen the mouth restraints

Maybe she can be of use, and also if we need to we could simply put them back on
>[] Loosen her mouth restraints and talk with her before you do anything drastic
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>Zeke looks like a male Thunderbird

How'd we miss that, anyway?
>[x] Throw a blanket over her face and ignore her
Might actually be able to get some sleep.
But... That's not porn. Are you retarded? No, why am I even asking you, of course you are if you think that a black box with no other indication of sexual activity taking place is "porn".
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Fuck the police.
Please do not engage him, we've been trying to ignore him in the QTG but he just doesn't seem to stop. My deepest apologies, all of you. This man does not reflect /tg/'s personal opinions.
Thank you, you may go.
[x] Throw a blanket over her face and ignore her

The kid just wants some sleep. Daring escapes and new acquaintances can wait until morning.

There are no nipples in that image. She's decent enough to spend the day at a public beach if you think about it.

Alright, thank you. Hopefully the message will be heeded.
Now you're shitposting off topic, which is against the rules.

For someone coming in and policing /tg/, you're not doing a very good job of upholding the rules very well yourself.
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Apologies, didn't see the areola.

Now what's winning?
You must understand, I as I'm sure most of the fellow thread-goers here have had our fill of people trying to push "warnings" , "unwritten rules", and "board culture" on us because "I don't like what you guys like in your guys' thread." Apologies if it comes off as over-defensive, however at the same time, after some of the shit we've dealt with it doesn't seem necessarily unwarranted.
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>[X] Loosen her mouth restraints and talk with her before you do anything drastic

Also, I missed the earlier vote, but why you guys never wanna kill the baddies in bromonts threads? Geez, such a buzz kill.
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To be fair, I think we've killed a lot of people over the course of the adventures. I'm sure we'll probably kill lots more.

Also, loosening mouth restraints seem to be winning.
>All I know is that in my short exposure to you guys, you've certainly earned your reputation.

You get too easily upset over things people say on 4chan, anon.
Says the guy telling us he'd just stop by to warn us.

You're not fooling anyone, anon. You've done this before. Only this time, you're still genuinely angry. Even if you're not, it's clear you're just fishing for replies. Now, you can stick to reeming everything you don't like for the rest of your days on /tg/, but we'd much rather you just sit down with us and enjoy the adventure together.

And if not, that's alright, we mean you no ill will. After all, we'll all here for the same thing.
This will end in tears.
Everyone seems to be on a hair trigger waiting for something to start causing a problem, and for everything to catch fire.



People who take notice of the thread should do what they normally do. Get interested, get uninterested, or filter.
There's no need to continue a cycle of posting and responding, everything is fine right now.

For me however, it's time for sleep.
[X] Loosen her mouth restraints and talk with her before you do anything drastic

"Oh fuck no, you kidding me?", Zeke looks at the succubus with shaking legs, "That's a fricken DEMON"

Zeke very cautiously hurdles over to the chained up succubus and removes her mouth restraints.

"No I'm not!", Zeke yells out loud to himself, the succubus seems mildly confused by his words, "I'm doing nothing of the sort!"

Zeke is clearly overwrought with fatigue, talking to himself like he's some sort of loony. There's a perfectly safe monster girl restrained in such a way that she couldn't possibly harm a fly. Obviously hearing her speak will not in any way harm the boy.

"What if she entrances me into giving her some sort of kiss of death? Or maybe BRAINWASHING. She's a DEMON"

Common sense was never Zeke's strong point, but at the very least he's cautious. So, curious as to the new character's motives, the boy carefully removes her mouth restraints.

"Oh, goddamn it", Zeke exclaims much to his own dismay as the voice in his head dictates her personal actions.

The succubus's mouth restraint slides right off without too much complications, though the marks on her cheeks are still visible. The boy begins to wonder just how long this woman has been imprisoned here.

"You're not... you're not going to eat me or anything, are you?", Zeke asks the succubus with terror in his voice.

"...", the succubus's one visible eye is a rich red pupil covered in inhuman black sclera looks down to the boy very seriously.

...She's not speaking...

Unable to take the silence, the boy begins to break it with idle chatter.

"I-I'm uh... my name is Zeke Northwind. I'm from Garma, sometimes spelled with an 'h'. Do you know where that is?"

"No, no of course you probably wouldn't", Zeke begins to fidget nervously, "Uh... so, I was traveling here with my friends until I got separated. Kidnapped, really. By those lightning harpies. I wasn't thrown in here to be your food or anything, you understand, I was just uh... well, that's a long story too..."


"Look, my mother told me all about succubus types. How you're always dishonest and... really yucky. I don't really wanna get myself apprehended like that. I've heard stories about how you run an Amusement Park that lures children to never be seen again. Or atleast, that's a bedtime story my mom used to tell me. That's not true, is it?"


"That's not helping. At all. I'm starting to get more upset here. That eye of yours is really really bright and scary looking. You're not thinking about sucking my soul out right now, are you? I guess asking you isn't going to help me, unless you were maybe one of the nicer ones that told me what you were gonna do ahead of time. Though, those types are always like "And then I'm going to do X and there's nothing you can do about it" any stuff... like, in an evil way. You're not evil, are you miss?"


"You look evil. Really really evil. But, you're the first, um, succubus I've ever met. So, I'm not sure if appearances are all that important. I believe what's important is what's on the inside, right? By the eye patch... that eye patch looks really suspicious..."


"I'm rambling, aren't I? Well, I'm only doing that because you're not talking! And that's making me nervous, like you're about to cast some big spell that'll knock me out or suck my soul. I'd really hate to bad end like that, after everything I went through"


"Please, Miss Succubus, I really really miss my mom right now", the boy begins to actively tear up, "I need to know if you're going to kill me or not. I don't want you to play around with my like that!"
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"Why aren't you saying anything!?"

"I'm waiting for you to let me out", the succubus explains with an abnormally calm tone.

"W-Why would I do that!? So you could kill me easier?"


"Stop that! I don't even know your name! Give me that much atleast!"

"Dani", the demon girl's serious eye turns much more friendly, "Dani Geminia!"



"Ugh, Dani, I'm not sure if you're giving me that look because you're not hostile or because you're trying to lure me into a false sense of security! Would you cut it out---! I just wanna get some sleeeeeep!"

"Why don't you free me and find out yourself?", Dani speaks in a slightly cracking voice.

Almost like... a goose? Maybe not that extreme.

[] This is much too stressful, put the restraints back on and go to sleep
[] Too much risk! Find something to beat the demon to death with!
[] Throw holy water in her face
[] Release the succubus from her chains
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>[X] Release the succubus from her chains
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Well hey, I don't like it when you guys fight each other. I'd like it much better if we all worked together and loved monster girls as one.

In monmusu titties, unity. Unity through monster girls.
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>pretense of danger or choice
You are just the cutest little thing.

[x] Release the succubus from her chains
I regret nothing. Except for Dani no longer being Jailbait

[x] This is much too stressful, put the restraints back on and go to sleep

Dani has suffered enough already
[X] release succubus from her chains
the cameo we all wanted but never deserved
[X] Release her
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>Succubus is Dani

[x] Release the succubus from her chains
[X] Throw holy water in her face

Never trust those who share traits with the Anatidae family. They are known to be liars and rapists.
>[] Throw holy water in her face
[X] Throw holy water in her face
Throw holy water in her face
What's with this sudden deluge of holy water?
I just voted the once, but I suspect that the others are just people trying to stir things up again.
Blast it with pholy water
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Holy water
>[x] Release the succubus from her chains
Oh wow. I didn't notice this thread despite it being up for days.

[x] Release the succubus from her chains
Oh shit, it HAS been up for a few days.

Isn't there an age limit on threads?
>[] Throw holy water in her face
[X] Throw holy water in her face
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Aaaand stop, let's tally up.

>7 for [X] Release the succubus from her chains
>5 for [X] Throw holy water in her face

Friendly reminder that you have to check your submissions, and also you can always vote more than one option.
I count 8 for holy water.
>Friendly reminder that you have to check your submissions
Learn to read. He's ignoring the three without an X in the box so that the option he wants wins.
Wow, thats incredibly gay. Nowhere in his first post or even any subsequent posts does he say this.
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blah blah yay EX5 blah blah getting around to finishing it someday blah blah blah

Oh shit, good to see you back
Some would think it's common sense, it's like you guys have never been in a Quest/CYOA or Bromont Thread before. Also, with all the shitposting going on, it's hard enough for him to tally votes, so why not take the logical step or making it a little easier, eh?

Delicious Suckybutt
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[X] Release the succubus from her chains

"Do you promise me you're not gonna eat me or rape my soul or something?"

"Huh? But that's exactly what I'm gonna do."


"Kidding", Dani gives the boy an apologetic face, "Sawwy"


"Yep! You have my word!", the succubus nods ever so slightly inside her imprisonment, "Not gonna harm you"

"Look. If I help you out, will you get me outta here?"

"Well, how the heck would I know the way out if I'm in the same dilemma you're in?", Dani tilts her head slightly, "This isn't some sort of NPC-related quest where the guy knows everything about his problem but he's just too lazy to do anything about it"

"What are you even talking about?"



"True love! Have you ever had a hankering for vanilla fudge ice cream on a cold winter day?"

"N-...I don't think so?"

"Then you know nothing of love. Truly pitiful", the squeaky voiced succubus opens her mouth wider to laugh, "Ka-ka"

"Alright, forget it, I'm going to sleep-"

"Hey! Wait! Come on, be a neighbor and lend a helping hand?"

"WHY? You don't have any leverage here"

"Because if you release me from my prison, I will grant you THREE wishes!"

"You're not a genie!"

"You don't know that! I could just be a really convincing actor. C'mon, why won't you help me out?"
"Because I'm SCARED!"

"Don't be. It'll be all right. Trust me!"

"..God..", Zeke looks over the succubus's restraints, "Damn it, fine"


"So... how do I get you out of there?"

"See that vase in the corner?"

"Whoa, when did that get there?", Zeke immediately notices a vase with a cross-shaped picture on it.

"That's 'holy water'. Just sprinkle it on my chains and it'll melt right off. Careful not to get any on me though, 'holy water' is a natural aphrodisiac for demon girls"

"That is the stupidest..."

Zeke picks up the cross-shaped vase and begins to sprinkle the liquid across the chains, being very careful as to not fuck up majorly. The liquid corrodes and melts the Succubus's restraints within seconds, she jolts herself out and breaks whatever remains off her body.

Dani stands before the boy now, towering about his shorter-than-average physique. Her short hair is a darker shade of blue, accented by the demon horns on the side on her head. Her body is curvy, thick in the places that matter and thinner in the places that accent beauty.

She wears that certain succubus outfit that seems stereotypical upon first glance, but rather unique and sexy upon further investigation. There's a green jewel on each bridal gauntlet, possessing a pentagram-like shape inside it's surface. Exotic pattern? Check. Sexy high heels? Check. Heavily revealing? Big check there.

"...", Dani looks down at the boy now, the merry smile from her lips replaced with an inhumanly neutral glimmer.

"Oooooh... I've made a terrible mistake"

"...", the menacing demon girl kneels on her high heels, inching closer to the boy's face.

"Damn it! Come on! I don't want any of this anymore! I just wanna see my mother-", Zeke begins to tremble in terror.

Releasing a restrained succubus from her shackles? In a room with no escape no less? How dimwitted could you possibly get?
"...", Dani's face enters the illuminated portion of the cell, while wrought with thick purple lipstick and exotic eyeliner, upon further inspection is incredibly soft and warm looking.

Like, seeing a beautiful woman standing before a dim flame, a sense of calming euphoria enters the boy's mind. Dani's face is soft, and alluring, though it seems featureless through it's perfection. The imperfections of her nose and cheeks blend in as though they were sculpted for better character. Look at her face brings the image of home to mind, but not on some sort of a physical plane.


Dani embraces the boy around her enormous bosom, and gives him a hug only mothers are familiar with.

"Ooh...", the boy's slobbering sobbing face is stunted.

"There there, you're going to be just fine. Everything's going to be all right."

"This helps."

"I knew it would, boys are all the same"

"----", the boy shudders at her words quite uncomfortably, "You're pretty nice, Miss Dani"

"Well, you remind me of my daughter"

"You're a mother, Miss Dani?"

"I prefer the term 'MILF'. I think it sounds cool, I wonder what it means"

"Um.. I'm still kinda.. crying", Zeke sniffs his nose a little bit, "I don't know why. I'm sorry"

"You're just simply overloaded at the moment. Take a couple deep breathes and everything will seem much better"

"But why would it-?"

"The world is how you view it", Dani rubs the boy's hair very fondly, "And it just seems bad right now because you're cranky."


"You're tired, aren't you? Kids get cranky when they're tired"

"I guess so.", Zeke rubs his nose as he looks up to the succubus, "Um. Can I ask you a question?"

"Certainly. About anything."

"Can I... Can I call you 'Mother Goose'?"

"...", Dani gives the boy a disapproving pout, but eventually rolls her eye, "Yeah, sure kid, do whatever you want. I've got your back."

"Cool!", Zeke wipes his face off one more time then bucks up, "Thanks, I feel much better, Mother Goose!"
"I'm glad. Now why don't we get some rest?", Dani rubs the boys shoulders with no ulterior motive, "We should make sure you're rested up when we escape"

"I can't rest while we're still in this damned jail cell-"

"Oh, I wouldn't worry about that", Dani points off screen, "I think your friend's got that covered."

Zeke pries his face away from Dani's motherly chest in time to notice a familiar black and white slime girl standing in front of the cell door.


"Mafuya? M-Mafuya!", the boy waves to the nureonago.

"...Mafuya sees Zeke is getting friendly with blue skinned prostitute", the slime girl stares straight through the boy, deadlocked on Dani.

"Um.. yeah? Dani here's being really nice to me-"

"Mafuya is about ten seconds away from cutting a bitch"

"...Oh~?", Dani covers her mouth as she looks back to Zeke, a smile from ear to ear, "Looks like she likes you"

"She's...", Zeke smiles very nervously, "She's got a knife..."


The main party returns to the ferry without Zeke, which prompts the oppai goblin girl to cross her arms in disappointment. Well, sort of. It's actually very hard for her arms to reach.

"WHERETHEBOYAT?HE'SMYCHESTSAVER", she speaks in a thick Louisianan accent.

"Didn't get him, but we'll be back to scoop him back up when we're done-", Lily openly tells the goblin girl.

"Lily, shut up-!"


"Now wait, please be reasonable-!"


The goblin girl releases her lodge from the shore and drifts off into the strangely pastel color scheme.

"Princess, why don't we just kill the goblin girl and TAKE her ferry?", Adena mentions offhandedly.

"I cannot.", Annette watches the oppai girl float off into the neonset, "I am... enamored by her fortitude"

"She must have her fair share of back problems", Athryn states while trying not to giggle.
"Well, that sucks a fat one", Lily looks down the river, which is infested with robot crocodiles, the ferrymaster seems to be shooting a few in the distance with a shotgun, "How're we supposed to travel now?"

"BYYYYAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!", the little fairy stuck in Kakra's cleavage suddenly breaks the tension.

"Ah, fuck. We keep forgetting you're with us-"

"FUCK, I RAN OUT OF AIR", Niia coughs and groans, "You shouldn't worry, there's a common way of travel within the forest of lightning. It's only accessible now that we're close to the secotioids"

"And that is...?"

The party comes across a herd of wild BUMPER KARTS nestling around a nearby fungus cluster. They move about as if they were on a simple bumper kart track, though there doesn't seem to be any tracks of the sort.

"Are you fucking kidding me?", Lily throws her arms up, "This is AWESOME, I LOVE THIS PLACE!"


A radish girl wearing sunglasses covered in hip tattoos enters the scene doing tricks on a skateboard. She lands before the party and gives a double thumbs up.


"Oh hey, Radical Radish, my least favorite mascot"


[] Yeah sure, why not
[] Is there some sort of trick?
[] No.
[] It's a tad bit suspicious how you always find us, why is that?
[] Throw the radish girl inside the river

Also, hi tottori.

[x] throw radish girl into the river
>[x] It's a tad bit suspicious how you always find us, why is that?
>[X] No.
Manuals are for sissies.
>[X] Throw the radish girl inside the river
Hm, way the hell not?
>[X] It's a tad bit suspicious how you always find us, why is that?
[x] It's a tad bit suspicious how you always find us, why is that?

>'holy water' is a natural aphrodisiac for demon girls"

That was a great Doujin.

>"Mafuya is about ten seconds away from cutting a bitch"

I may or may not loathe Ebonics, but when Mafuya says it I just can't help but smile.
Pretty sure those two particular posts were counted, though.
I think more than one x between the brackets would cause the CTRL+F function to ignore your post, if that is how Bromont is counting them.
Erm... Anon, correct me if I'm wrong, but wouldn't throwing holy water at the succubus also free her?
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>[X] Yeah sure, why not
>mfw motherly milf Dani
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[x] It's a tad bit suspicious how you always find us, why is that?

Tell me your secrets vegetable woman.
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Welcome back, tottori. I see your skill has gotten even better. Can't wait to see it finished. R-Right? There's free hugs involved if you do!
[X] Throw the radish girl inside the river

"Um, no."


Without any hint or warning, Lily slides behind the talking radish girl and picks her up by the stem.


"Alright, I've had just about enough of this", the ninja girl expresses with a lukewarm expression.

"Wait, Lily, just what are you planning to do?", Athryn attempts to steady the annoyed woman.

"I'm gonna do what we all should've done from day one", Lily begins to walk back down to the river, "I'm going to throw the tutorial mascot into that river"

"Wait no, Lily, that's not-", Ivy vaguely attempts to stop the ninja girl, though not very hard.

"Wait no, stop...", Jojo mutters out just loud enough to be heard but not taken seriously.


"Alright.", Lily stops and raises the plant girl up to hear her clearly.

"Well... did you know that... uh... in order to defeat the crystal spring dragon, you must attack the glowing center point with all of your might?"

"That was second adventure, this is the forth"

"The forth? Shit. Really?", Radical Radish looks around frantically and grits her teeth, "Shit. Well, bumper karts require steering-"

"Yep. Into the river"

"What do you have against good bumper kart etiquette!?"

"So long"
Lily tosses the radish girl inside the river full of man-eating metal fish without a hint of regret, and quickly returns to the party dusting off her hands.

"Where were we?"

"Transportation", Annette looks over at the neon bumper karts beneath the giant mushroom, "Looks like that's a safe bet"

"But isn't the forest really really thick? How're those supposed to pass through?"

"No, the outer part is really thick", the chest fairy peeks her head out from beneath the dullahan's breasts, "We've passed most of that. It's all one big pinball palette now"

"Alright, that answers that", Ossla digs her claws into her hips, "Now, what are we doing about Zeke?"

"What do you mean?", Kakra shoots the dragon girl a sly look, "Easier just to leave him to his fate. Isn't it?"

"You know, ever since this thing started, you've had a bug stuck up your ass over the kid, Kakra", Jojo's voice rises as he confronts the dullahan.

"He's a snot nosed kid, who cares?"

"Kakra.", Anny swats her subject with annoyance, "Stop your mockery at once. You and I both know he's a credit to the team"

"Hmph. Some credit...", Kakra pouts as she crosses her arms, the fairy between her chest does the same.

"Kakra just misses him in her own way", Adena very bluntly states as she shakes her head, "The two prank each other relentlessly"

"Alright, maybe I do a little. But that doesn't change the fact that pranking the Queen is kind of out of the way, isn't it?", says the dullahan as she plays with her hair.

"Not exactly, she's sitting on the slime, after all", Annette explains very carefully to the party, "It's just a matter of execution"

"...What was that back there, Anny?", Ossla forgets about Zeke for a moment and averts attention back to the princess, "You lost your cool back at the octopus"

"It was nothing", Annette shakes her neatly combed head, "I just don't like people making fun of my disposition"
"Perfecto Princess has always kinda been like that", Kakra admits very solemnly.

"But, back on topic, Adena-?"

"Yes, your majesty?"

"Have you any actual plans of-"



The Daddy Mulk River explodes into a tornado of bluish green metallic sparks, the clouds about shatter as the powers spirals rip through the skies above. A thunderous roar is heard, from beneath this rising fabric.

Radical Radish leaps before the party, purplish residue emanating from her necklines. She takes one more step before an explosion of energy and power encompasses the party's view.

A ominous figure emerges from Radish's stomach, ripping apart her carcass and swooping into the field like a horseman of the apocalypse. The trees and grass melt behind him, as he draws his gargley breath behind his heavily encrusted gargoyle styled helmet.

The figure stands before the party, roughly 8-9 foot tall in height, in weighted and heavily detailed armor. His voice is distorted and flangered beneath his helmet, his roar shakes the very foundations of reality as he stretches his limbs.

"AHHHH, I AM FREE!", the ominous man with a maximum level stat above his head exclaims.

"Who's that guy?", Ossla points to the man with her thumb.

"Doesn't look like Santa Claus", Lily shrugs at the dragon girls questions.

"Well Mary, would you look at that. I think the final boss has appeared a little premature", Ivy talks as she touches her forehead.


"Certainly smells like a Blight", Athryn pinches her nose beneath her face mask.

"Hey...", Adena shoots the Sea Bishop a sour look.

"OH SIR ATHRYN, PLEASE SAVE US!", the elven servants swarm around the reverse trap.

"Yes... of course...? Of course..."

"Yeah, huh.", Lily begins to dig her little finger into her ear canal.

"Gee, nice going, bitch", Jojo scowls even harder than humanly possible.

"Eh, bound to happen sooner or later"

"YOU...", Augustus Blight points to the princess, thousands of shining orange skulls with cat ears swarm around his fingers.

"Hello", Annette casually greets the final boss.

"YOUR POWER... OF RA...", the ominous figure makes a pose like Jagi from Hokuto no Ken, "IT IS FORMIDABLE, YES"

"It's alright, I guess"


A giant cosmic chicken man with seven individual skulls littered across it's multiple heads emerges from the man's back, it's fists creak and crack with several hundred powers of the stars above. It's power is unmatchable, the sheer horrifying atmosphere of the God quakes and quivers the very fabric of reality around it.

The final boss theme of the game begins to blare out, as every prepares for the fight of the millenniums-!

"LET US DO BATTLE, CHILD OF RA. YOUR PUNY EGYPTIAN GOD STANDS NO CHANCE, AGAINST THE KING OF KINGS-", Augustus Blight waves his arms around dramatically, his pose is one ready for pure hand to hand fighting.

Truly, this will require the strength of all of mankind. But will it be enough!?

Augustus Blight removes his helmet, revealing his monstrously powerful gaze. Embedded into his skin is the thousand screaming faces of all those great who perished before him-!
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"...", Annette pulls out a Mauser C96 and shoots the final boss in the face. As he falls to the ground dead, she casually turns back to the party, "Anyway, like I was saying, Adena you're the one who suggested we pull some sort of prank off"

"You're right. Well, I wasn't thinking it through clearly, merely going with the most convincing route"

"Then, do we have any suggestions?"

"The old tack in the chair trick?", Jojo nods his head confidently.

"Kind of tired"

"How about we hold her in place and thai kick her?", Ivy kicks the air stylishly, "Thai kicku!"

"Really lacks style"

"We could go for a panty raid", Lily mentions with a perverse smile, "Have the harpies use her panties as a flag"

"That's a maybe"

"How about we put black dye in her drinking water, that way, her skin will change color?", Ossla adds with a giggle.

"That's right, plants do change color according to dye. It'd be pretty funny"

"We could take turns teabagging her", Athryn coughs out very crudely.

"I wasn't... expecting that from you, but all right"

"We could ask the audience?", Ivy adds with a finger raised.

"Only as a last resort"

"Well, we have to decide on SOMETHING!"

[] Put a tack in the Queen's chair
[] Thai Kick the Queen in the buns
[] Steal the Queen's underwear and parade them
[] Put color dye in the Queen's drinking water
[] Teabag the Queen
[] Pie in the face
[] Batsu!
[] -Insert idea here-
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hmmmmmm. Well:
>[] Put a tack in the Queen's chair
An oldie but a goodie, but may not have the desired effect.
>[] Thai Kick the Queen in the buns
Seems more painful than humiliating.
>[] Steal the Queen's underwear and parade them
Bretty good, but from what we saw of this frenchie alraune queen, I wouldn't be surprised if she goes commando like the slutty frenchie she is.
>[] Put color dye in the Queen's drinking water
Not sure how this would be humiliating, but I will assume that the color of the water she consumes has some kind of visual effect on her skin that will be funny. A solid Maybe.
>[] Teabag the Queen
LOLyes, I'm not quite sure how our party would do this, but this would definitely be quite humiliating. Though since it's a sexual thing, and monster girls love this shit, it may not have the desired effect?
>[] Pie in the face
A classic, solid all rounder.
>[] Batsu!
Sure, why not?
>[] -Insert idea here-
But I'm an unimaginative fuck, so I don't have anything.

I'm honestly tied between
>[] Put color dye in the Queen's drinking water
>[] Teabag the Queen
>[] Pie in the face

Well, if she's so french, would that mean she has hairy pits and all?

Do plant girls even have hair on their pits?
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>[] Thai Kick the Queen in the buns
>mfw I see what you did there.
[X] Put LSD in the Queen's drinking water

Nothing funnier than an entire city in the throes of substance abuse.
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Whatever is picked, it will have to be something that can proven that the heroes did to get Zeke back from the thunder birds.

I'm torn between:
[x] Steal the Queen's underwear and parade them
[x] Put color dye in the Queen's drinking water

Though the batsu option is also intriguing, I do not know how the logistics of that would be handled. If it could be done, and done well, then: [x] Batsu!
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>Why white socks?

Because I thought I was done but forgot that part, then I decided I was too lazy to make them something besides white socks
[x] Put color dye in the Queen's drinking water

If that's not enough then we can also
[x] Steal the Queen's underwear and parade them
I love what you do man.
>[x]Color dye in queen's drinking water.
>[x]Teabag queen
>[x](Insert idea) Throw Miracle Grow over her tits to make them swell to a ridiculous size.
...Which option could lead to delicious monstergirl funtimes?
Probably the teabagging option. The chemical reaction between slime and tea leaves might cause some humorous response.
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As always tottori, looks pretty damn great.
I think the white socks work just fine.
>[x] Put color dye in the Queen's drinking water
Sounds fun. Surely we can do better than black, though.
>dat pubic mound
>[x] Steal the Queen's underwear and parade them
Sounds like fun times to me.
>[x](Insert idea) Throw Miracle Grow over her tits to make them swell to a ridiculous size.
This... might be potato enough to spud. Seconding.
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>[x](Insert idea) Throw Miracle Grow over her tits to make them swell to a ridiculous size.
>[x] Put color dye in the Queen's drinking water
>[x] Steal the Queen's underwear and parade them

Either one of these work, or all of the above. Color dye has the most votes, what do you guys think?
All of them
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All of the above. Though I do wonder how they'll sneak into the Queen's chambers.
Going with all. Gotta prank at max power.

Just to emphasize, all of them, at the same time.
All of them is fine.
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>[x](Insert idea) Throw Miracle Grow over her tits to make them swell to a ridiculous size.
>[x] Put color dye in the Queen's drinking water
>[x] Steal the Queen's underwear and parade them

"Well Princess, there's no simple way to prank the queen. No single prank is worth that much effort", Adena bites her thumb as her mind runs rampant with suggestion, "No one prank would undermine her that much to begin with. Why not go all out and prank her as much as possible?"

"Wouldn't that be twice as dangerous, Princess?", Kakra looks to her superior pleadingly.

"No. It's as they say, Kakra", Annette holsters the Mauser pistol behind her, "Overkill is underrated"

"Excellent. I vote we coat her drinking water in color dyes, steal her underwear, and... hmm..", Adena can't quite seem to finish the sentence.

"Why color dyes?", Ivy goes crosseyed as she asks.

"When you put a flower in color dye, it absorbs the coloring albeit at the expense of good health", Annette explains very conclusively, "I'm sure we can make some homemade liquids from the surroundings. All we'd need to do is drop it in her plant's drinking water, and she'll look like a parkinson's patient's artistic canvas"

"Oh... so that's how it works?", the half vampire girl nods at the explanation, "So what if you put growth formula in there?"

Annette halts her indecisive planning for a moment and shifts her pretty purple eyes in the Dhampir's direction.

"Growth formula...?"

"Uh, sure. Mary says throwing 'Miracle Grow' over her tits will make them swell to a ridiculous size", Ivy nods with utmost certainty.

"Mary... did?", Anny's eyebrow expresses her dwindling curiosity, "Isabella, just who IS Mary exactly?"

"I bet if we squeeze off a photo of the princess sporting some ridiculously abnormally large breasts, it'd make the lightning harpy folks pretty happy!", the pale skinned girl gives a homely thumbs up.

"...Not going to tell me, are you?"
"Your highness-", Athryn quickly butts into the exchange with two elf girls latched onto her shoulders, "May I ask where our destination lies, precisely?"

"We entered the thicker backwoods for a reason. We'll be going the back way, sneaking into the Alraune Queen's home from the backdoor"

"Which is... where, exactly?"

"Hold on a moment-"

Annette reaches into her guardian Dullahan's bosom and takes out the same slumber brown skinned fairy as before...

...She looks unnaturally beautiful.

"Why IS Niia so purdy, anyway?", Ossla peeks over Anny's shoulder.

"She's had her beauty sleep", Annette snarks as she shakes the fairy between her fingers, "...Hey"

"Mhm...", the narcoleptic fairy fights to go back asleep.

"Sleep, Niia?"

"Sleep, please-a"

"Wake, Niia."

"Sleep, please-a"

Annette eyeballs the fairy girl very cruelly, a demented smile enters her face the closer she holds Niia up with her shaking fingers.

"Tell me, how do you like your martini, Mr. Bond?", Annette playfully whispers out to the fairy.

"Shaken, not stirred-", though the moment the words exit her lips, she stiffens up, "WAIT, STOP! I'M AWAKE!"

"Good", the gloomy princess releases the brown skinned fairy girl, "Which direction is the Alraune Queen's location?"

"Her Greenhouse Palace is to the east... I think?", Niia points down deep to the forest, "Atop a golden lake, a sea of technicolored bridges, arches of light, big pulsing techno beat. Trust me, it's very hard to miss, Anny"

"So we're close then?"

"Mildly. It's just a little further to the east, using the karts you'll get there in no time at all"

"...Thanks Niia, despite being unreliable, you were a great help"

"Oh.", Niia lets out a elongated yawn, "Stop."

"Niia, I want you to listen to me very carefully, because I'm going to instruct you do something very important. And you cannot fall asleep while I'm tell you this", Princess Anubis's eyes narrow unto the hovering fairy.
"Hu~h...?", the fairy wipes away her eye sand, "What do you need?"

"I need you to go back to the Neon Octopus and try to free Zeke, understood?"

"Ehhh... there's no way I could do that-"

"Then go back there and give him some company. If he manages to free himself, lead him back to Rakenmire. You're our plan B if something happens to the plan A"

"I'm... very much...", Niia nearly falls asleep in mid-air, "Yeah yeah, I'll do it"

"Thank you, I wish you luck", Annette shakes her little fairy friend's hand with her ring finger.

The fairy very lazily flies off back towards the river, moving at a near snails pace. She wags her silvery wings like old people fuck.

"She's not going to be any help to the kid, you know", Jojo admits with a shrug.

"She's not really any help to us either. Frankly, I'm nervous", Annette tells the party very earnestly, "I'm not very good at pulling off pranks"

"No need to worry", Adena poses fabulously as she explains, "We've plenty experience in all fields involved"

"Yes, no need to worry Perfecto Princess-", Kakra poses fabulously next to Adena, "We're so good at it, we're pulling them ALL off at the SAME time!"

"Yeah!", Ivy poses fabulously next to the other two, "Whatever they said"

"What the hell y'all flems doing?", Ossla says as the three girls pose with even greater extraordinary flexibility.

"I... I don't know", Adena admits as she twists and turns.

"...", Ossla's confused dragon eyes turn to horrified dragon eyes the moment her body begins to move on it's own, "A-AH!"

"IT'S CONTAGIOUS!", Lily yells out as well, catching chronic vogue posing syndrome in unison.

The girls strike one more fabulous pose across the panel that serves as nothing more than the cover of the story. It's like seeing a part in a motion picture where everything is loud and dramatic although it serves no purpose in the grand scheme of things. A trailer shot, if you will.

Jojo pulls a muscle as he attempts to join in.
-Zeke has left the party!-

-Niia has left the party!-

Our not-so-heroic 'proto-gon-ists' make their way to the electric bumper karts, and although they are numerous in number, the elven slaves are only given a single kart to share with.

"So Athryn", Lily nudges the reverse trap in the shoulder, "You're a paladin or some shit, right?"

"Cleric is the proper word, and please do not touch me"

"What's your creedo? Good for the good god?"

"Go climb a wall of...", Athryn looks at the ninja girl with wryer eyes than usual, "You're not even worth it anymore."

"Oh, that's no fun", Lily touches her own cheeks playfully, "I'm going to have to try harder now"

"Please don't"

"I feel like I've been issued a challenge"

Our bizarre party mates find their own individual styled kart to their personal likings. The bumper karts seem to have minds of their own, shying away from the party the closer they get. But of course, they're no match for a good old fashioned pair of opposable thumbs. Within minutes, they're tamed behind the combined riding skills of the entire party.

Except Jojo's.

"WHAT IN THE SAMUEL HILL-!?", Jojo yells in distress as his bumper kart swings around viciously.

"MOO!", the bumper kart groans out with strong opposition.

"ADENA!", Lancer is thrown from side-to-side like a ragdoll, "ADENAAAAA!"

"...", Adena drives by Lancer's kart very casually.


"Ah, you'll get the hang of it", the sorceress giggles beneath her hooded figure as she drives off.

"DOES IT WANT MY QUARTERS!?", Jojo yells out still in a panic.

"MOO!", the bumper kart cries out to it's comrades.

"HERE!", Jojo reaches into her pocket and throws a multitude of quarters into the bumper kart, "TAKE THEM, TAKE THEM ALL!"

"MOOOOOOOOOOO!", the bumper kart groans in pain as Jojo continually throws wads of quarters inside.

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What am I even reading?
Eventually, the party enters the thicker part of the forest, regrouping as one.

The pastel robotic trees are neatly spaced apart, the bark being splinted out in separate hexagon shaped indentions. The grass is a strange shade of purple and blue, it seems to crease beneath the bumper karts causing little friction. The ground beneath the grass seems smoother than normal dirt, causing little complications in speed or maneuverability.

"HEY, THIS IS ACTUALLY KINDA FUN!", Kakra exclaims in glee, a trail of green neck smoke tailing her.


The trees make a pinball machine nose as Ossla slams into one and repels her straight off.

"HAH! WHAT?", the dragon girl crackles out, having a little too much fun.

As Ivy speeds along an avenue, Adena flies around the corner, shooting out like a shooting star. The two didn't notice each other until they were in ramming distance-!




A cartoonish bonk softens the collision, the two girls bounce off one another and slam into two separate pairs of trees.

"Oh.. Oh wow", Ivy covers her mouth as she tries hard no to smile, "How is somebody... supposed to stay MAD on one of these things?"

"YOU SON OF A BITCH-!", Adena stands up from her kart seat and points to the Dhampir, "You..."


"You GOT ME, so GOOD just then", Adena's villainous exterior immediately bleeds away, revealing the sleeping child inside.

"Would you look at that, Mary? Adena's actually SMILING. Not like a wicked one, like a genuine smile. I knew she wasn't a complete sour puss!"

Jojo passes the two girls, whose hairs colors if combined would make something mint in flavor, barely in control of a mere bumper kart.

"WHAT DO THESE THINGS RUN ON!?", yells Lancer, who ignored the earlier explanation of being powered by lightning secotioids.

"HEY, BOBO!", Lily announces her presence behind Lancer's kart.

Lily's kart bumps into the back of Jojo's, bonking his helmeted head back and forth, slamming on the wheel and slamming into the back of the chair.


"WAH, NOBODY WANTS TO PLAY WITH ME ANYMORE", Lily puts on a playful slurring accent.









Jojo shoots off a fallen tree and flies straight into a puffy white bush full of Christmas tree lights. The bush somehow explodes into a fine mist of purplish flames.

"OH MY GOD, YOU KILLED LANCER!", Ivy yells out as she clutches both sides of her mouth.

"You bastard!", Adena shakes her fist in the air.

Switching back to the Princess, who's racing confidentially at the head of the group, her cape wisping gracefully in the wind, as is her Anubis ears in plain view. Ossla and Kakra come flying up behind her, slamming into one another's sides.

"HEY, PRINCESS!", Kakra tries to get Anny's attention, "You can SIDE BUMP in these things. Is that not just the greatest!?"

"Up yours, Dollar Ham!", Ossla side bumps into Kakra's kart.

"Suck a fat one, you fat-assed Dragon!", Kakra returns the slam with due strength.

"Hah, funny you of all people talking about fat asses!", Ossla spin slams the frizzy haired dullahan.

"Would you rather I talk about chests?", Kakra smashes into Ossla's kart, locking them both in place.

The Egyptian princess begins to become annoyed by her party's conduct, her stubborn pride wounded by their inability to take anything seriously.

"OI!", Annette slams her fist into her kart's wheel, hoping to get everyone's attention.

...The Lightning Forest's bumper kart honking noise is set to the theme of funky town.

"...", Annette stares at her wheel mildly astonished by the weird horn.

"Why're you salty, Princess?", Ossla rides alongside Annette, "Princess's shouldn't be salty, they should be sweet. Like me"
"Ossla, if you had a taste, it'd burn someone's tongue off", Kakra sticks out her tongue beside the blue dragon girl.

"And if you had a taste, the guy's tongue would fall off. Because you taste ROTTEN", Ossla returns fire at the lowly dullahan.

"Aren't the two of you in the least concerned about Zeke?", Annette glares at Ossla and Kakra, "Or for that matter, securing my position as Pharaoh? Do you think we have much time left? Do you think it should be spent acting like a couple of undignified morons?"


The two take a quick look at one another and then back to the princess.

"Princess, we know the dangers of what we're doing. But life is short, if we're still managing to get to our goal, why not have some fun while we do it?"

"BECAUSE", Annette's stern and stubborn personalty refuses to budge or have fun.


The forest-way suddenly changes as the party passed through a thick patch of giant glowing fungi. They enter some sort of a trance-like neon highway, powered by the mushrooms producing the power. Tiny shapes and symbols are embedded in the neon highway, as the colors mix together like some sort of rainbow road.

The bumper karts begin to make a pleasing and much more quiet noise as their flaps rubs across the road, little sparks of blue light shooting behind them.

"N-NO... I CAN'T...", Annette attempts to ignore the extravagant change in scenery.

Little fluffy specks of flower seeds begin to shower the roadway's sides, magically upbeat music begins to take the scene as the neon road enlarges into a highway. As they pass over highlighted bumps, little vibrations enter their eardrums and massage their ear canals comfortably.

Holographic words and symbols begin to float overhead, as everybody passes through the roadway and high fives one another. The shapes burn themselves directly into Annette's hiding face, sending mixed signals of pleasure through her subconscious as her imagination is enlightened exploited.
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"Ah.. damn it"

Annette begins to smile, her hands lose their concentrated magic and revert back to puffy Anubis palms. Annette's stubborn heart melts away into a sea of bliss for the next couple minutes.

As does everyone elses.

The party eventually passes the fungi clusters, reentering the forest in it's normal state.

"Pleasant.", Athryn nods very confidently as her/his pretty red hair blows in the breeze.

"Wasn't it?", Ossla grabs herself and gives a self hug.

"I've seen better.", Adena looks on ahead with a straight face.

"WE WOULD'VE ENJOY IT MORE IF WE WEREN'T ALL STRUGGLING TO HOLD OOOON!", the elven servant girls struggle driving around on their single bumper kart.

"Nobody cares"

As the party drives further and further towards their destination, another troubling though comes out.

"Your highness, exactly HOW are we supposed to enter this palace?", Adena looks over to the princess.

"We use the key for the back door"

"...Do we have a key?"

"We do not."

"Where do we find the key?"

"I know somebody who has it for certain"

"You do?"

"Yes. Two people have a key for sure. The Queen, and the Princess"

"So we have to acquire the key from either one, huh? But if the queen is securely locked inside the palace, how do we get it?"

"We get it from Vear"

"Vear is.."

"Vear is the princess"

"And Vear will just give us the key?"

"No. But she has it"

"Alright. I understand that much. But just how are we supposed to find this 'Vear'?"

"Destroy or burn down the forest. She's in sync with it"

"Oh. Alright. Sounds to my liking", Adena twiddles her fingers like a cartoon villain.

"Unless we randomly run into her or something, in some off chance"
The trees become much thicker and dense, the bark becoming rougher in material and sharper in length. The party's faces and karts are reflecting right off the bark's shiny white surfaces.

There's actually a few monster girls wandering around the foreground. FERAL weregirls in abundance smacked with insect girls and plant girls blending in with the forests unnatural glammer.

"Hey, Ivy. How ya doin', white girl?", Lily drives alongside the Dhampir with a wave.

"Oh hey, Lily. Say, that's a pretty color for a kart", Ivy happily waves back to the ninja girl.

"Say, Chomper, you're half vampire right? So that means you like, a quarter undead or something, right? Some sort of affiliation?"

"Not.. really?"

"Say, you ever watch a zombie movie before?"

"Huh? Yeah, I've seen plenty-"

"You know what they say the last thing that happens to you when you die, right?"

"Your bowels release or something gross like that.. is that what you're talking about"

"Yeah, exactly! Now, keeping that in mind, you ever watch those movies thinking, 'WOW, EACH ONE OF THOSE ZOMBIES HAS RUINED DRAWERS' or something to that effect? Because you have to die to be a zombie, remember?"

"...", Ivy gives the dark skinned woman a serious look of disgust.

"You're never going to be able to unthink it. Never. Why do you think they walk so funny?", Lily drives uncomfortably close, "Enjoy your John Romero flicks now, you bitch"

The party finally hits the rocky side of a moutain, strangely enough it's unaltered in any sort of way. But it does serve as a landmark of sorts, lighting up the monotony of plant-life.

"This is a good landmark to remember", Kakra begins to snap her fingers' joints, "I'll mark the side by hand so we know where we stand"
"Let's look around a little and get used to the area-"


-"What was that?", Jojo asks as he returns to the party, a branch sticking out of his helmet.

"Sounded like singing", Adena explains as she adjusts her makeup, "I suggest we burn down the forest at once, it may be haunted"

"Now hold on a moment, that'd harm the local wild life-", Athryn plants her foot down firmly, "We can't just murder innocents for comfort or peace of mind-!"

"...", Adena glances over at the Sea Bishop with tired eyes.

"Bitch boy's right", Jojo slams his lance into the ground, "Let's just investigate the potentially horrifying creature's origins before we jump to any brash conclusions"

"Oi oi... Do you even listen to yourself talk sometimes", Lily whispers to herself, amazed by her companions stupidity.

The party follows the elegant hum, taking mind to be as cautious and quiet as possible. Hopefully, whatever horrible creature awaits, it will be satisfied with live elven meat.

They come across a circular forest clearing, the sound of flowing water inside. The party catches a glimpse of reflective light, as they find a fountain of remarkable beauty. The concrete pivots spin and turn, the water ripples in unnatural ways, little jolts of electricity can be seen covering the plant vines encumbering the fountains foundation.

Standing next to a beaker of white light, shining from beneath the fountains water like a tower watch light, is a girl no older than Annette.

Her hair is a mix of blonde and green, eyes redish. She wears two rugged leaves that barely cover her breasts with a rose petal skirt. Her thigh highs are made of sap. There are traces of lightning vines wrapped around her leg and arm. She's also got a mean mound of venus.
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Strangely enough, her skin color is humanish.

"She looks like a bad guy", Jojo mutters in the back, "I don't think she's noticed us yet"

"That's Vear", Annette plainly blurts out with no concern.

"Oh. Hey. Guess we did just 'run' into her", Adena shrugs it off, "You jinxed it, princess"

"That's one headache out of the way"

"Problem is, what do we do now?"

[] Use words to persuade the key away from Vear peacefully
[] Shoot the Alraune Princess in the face
[] Throw balloons full of piss at her
[] Bum rush the Alraune Princess and take her alive
[] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess
>[x] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess
[x] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess
It's not like this could go horribly wrong for Jojo and by extension everyone involved.
>[X] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess
Seems like a sound plan.
>[x] Bum rush the Alraune Princess and take her alive
Hostage! We can trade her for the Slime.
As much as I want to (>[] Shoot the Alraune Princess in the face) I know that that will make it extremely hard for us to prank the queen, sooooo

>[X] Bum rush the Alraune Princess and take her alive

Besides, what's more embarrassing then letting your princess get captured by the order of the futacock?
>[X] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess
I do love making Jojo do things so very much
[X] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess
[X] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess
Jojo is the sweetest talker
[x] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess
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>Time for kill even though I know Bromont doesn't have the balls to kill her off

>Implying every main character of the past quests were killed atleast once, some multiple times in the same thread

Think Roy was the only one who made it to the end.
>[x] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess
Marion happened, anon.

Mario happened.
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3/4's the Blights. Dark Slime Girl. First thread final boss. Violet dies at the end. Ash dies at the end. Zeke's dad. Lots of elves. Werebat girls.

People die when they are killed.
[x] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess
[x] Use words to persuade the key away from Vear peacefully
[x] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess
[x] Bum rush the Alraune Princess and take her alive
[x] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess

Throw Jojo at her, and whilst she's distracted, pin her to the ground.
[x] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess
[x] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess
[x] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess
[x] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess
[x] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess
lel i am samefag
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Guys, guys.

What's any of that have to do with monster girls? Come now, instead of getting mad at each other, why not post monster girls instead?
[x] Have Jojo sweet talk the princess
You can just report them, you know.
To be fair, there were no actual nipples present. So a warning sufficed.
It was questionable at best, as is >>27577523

NSFW? No, the punishment would be much more severe otherwise. All the images on this thread right now are worksafe.
Well, I wouldn't say they're "worksafe", but they're FAR from being pornography. You are absolutely correct though, anon, when you said "they're questionable at best."
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I hate it when it comes to that, totally sucks. Anyway, it looks like [X] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess is winning so far. Bumrush being second.

I'm a little sluggish tonight, so sorry if I'm slower than the last few days.
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>[X] Have Jojo sweet talk the Alraune Princess

"Jojo", the princess pokes the Lancer with her human fingers, recently transformed in the background, "Retrieve the key from the princess at once"

"...Eh?", Jojo looks around and points to himself, the branch stuck inside his helmet jiggling around, "You want ME to get the key?"

"Yes. It's a card-shaped object, it should be on her side"

"No no no, I understand HOW but WHY?"

"The element of surprise is still on our side, we've caught her while she's photosynthesizing", Annette points to the bright light around Vear, "Simply go up there and... do whatever it is humans do that grab the attention of the opposite sex"

"...Y'all want me to go up there and sweet talk the bitch?", Jojo points behind him with his thumb.

"Well, none of us can certainly do it. Vear is not a lesbian as far as I know. She is a monster girl, she'd respond positively to a male advance"

"...Then why the fuck wouldn't you send faggot over here?", Jojo points to Athryn with his staff.

"Hey...", the Sea Bishop looks kinda hurt by Jojo's phrasing.

"Hey, no offense, but you do look kinda feminine for a dude"

"Athryn will not suffice, for different reasons"

"DIFFERENT reasons, huh?", Jojo looks at the sparkling fountain then back to the party, "Y'all just want me to go up there because it's an obvious trap, don't you?"

"I didn't say that, those are your words"

"Your highness, be a little bit reasonable-"

"It's an order, Jones"

"Oh come on, you can't ORDER a man to GET DOWN"

"I just did"

"----", Jojo wearily does a double take back and forth one more time, "Man, the shit I do for loyalty"

Lancer takes out a red bow tie from his inventory and puts it on over his dragon scaled armor, and proceeds to neatly comb his helmet's surface.
He quietly maneuvers behind the Alraune princess, using his abnormal leaping skills, hops to the top most point of the water fountain. This grabs the attention of Vear, who snaps out of her photosynthesis.

"...Uh.. Hi-?", Jojo waves very weakling to the plant princess, "I couldn't help noticing you from the uh..."

"From the-?", Vear casually greets the Lancer without a hint of surprise.

"Well, if I said trees or bushes, I'd sound like a pervert stalker, you know what I mean?"

"I suppose so, but sneaking up on me, that doesn't seem like a pervy stalker thing to do?"

"Alright lady, put yourself in my shoes. You see a beautiful young lady from across a field, how do you approach her?"

"With more subtlety", Vear adjusts her static infused hair, "I don't hate it or anything"

"...Oh yeah?", Jojo proceeds to inflate his libido, "Well I guess I tend to grow on most folks. You too right? You being... a plant.. and all"

"Ooh, you like to talk dirty, don't you old timer?", Vear flashes Jojo a naughty look.

"Heh. Baby, if I were twenty years younger", Jojo touches his nose with his thumb, "I'd of swept you straight off your feet and straight into bed by now"

"I bet you would've, you smooth talker you"

"With age comes knowledge, you know", Jojo gives the plant princess an old perverted look, "I could teach you a thing a two, if you wanted"

"Hmm... come here", Vear motions to herself with her index finger.



Jojo motions over closer to the Alraune princess, as she narrows in to peck him on the cheek, she instead whispers into his ear.

"Anny has an old loser like you employed? She's even dumber than I thought"



Several million volts of electricity suddenly enters Jojo's skin as the princess inserts her electric vine wrangled arms into his chest.

"RRRRRRRRRAAAHHHHH", Jojo grits his teeth as he yells out in pain.

"Talk about a shocking experience, huuuuuuh?", Vear's face is stricken with a sick sense of sadism.
After several painful seconds of electrocution, the plant princess pulls away with happy and giddy laughter. She's smiles quite openly, taking in the smell of burning flesh much to her own delight.

"...The fuck you smiling at, bitch?", Jojo shrugs the air as smoke rises from her burns, "I'm STILL standing"

The sadistic smile across the princess's face vanishes in an instant, instead replayed by minor annoyance and anger.

"...You've been tormented quite a lot, haven't you?"

"You have no goddamned idea-"

A pair of ravenous biting vines emerge beneath the fountain's surface and tackle the Lancer off screen where sounds of chomping and snapping take place.

"ANNY~", Vear looks over at the forest clearing, "Come on out, I know you're there"

The party quickly hops off their bumper karts and enters the field of play. Annette seems mildly unsettled by involving herself further here.

"There's my N.I.L.E. pal~", Vear Vesperi stretches her fingers and strikes a pose atop the electro plant fountain.

"Hand over the key and nobody gets hurt", the Anubis princess proclaims.

"...Besides him?", Vear glances over to Lancer who's still getting chewed on by the man eating plants, "What is this, Anny~? I thought we were friends?"

"Your highness-?", Athryn pushes off some squealing elf girls, "You're involved with this person?"

"She used to be my N.I.L.E. buddy, browsing the internet, swapping stories and the like. Then she made a mean post on the internet about me, and we're mortal enemies"

"...Princess", Ivy's expression is dumbfounded to say the least, "Mortal enemies over a comment on the internet?"

"The internet is serious business", Annette proclaims in her authoritative voice, though goes strangely meek, "For hikki types, like me, I suppose. Only contact with the outside world until now..."
"Hey, you're out and about, you're making friends", Lily nudges Annette in the rib cage, "I'd say you're doing alright for yourself for a hermit"

"You touch the princess like that again and I'll cut your arms off", Kakra pushes the prodding ninja girl away.

"If you WANTED this key, you could've just asked nicely", Vear removes the card key from her inventory and brandishes in front of everyone, "We're still friends, right~?"

"...", the Egyptian royalty simply expresses her usual serious leer.

"What's the matter? Surely a ghouly girl like you could use a friend, right?", Vear says with a Shaft-styled posed look.

"...What.. did you just say?"

"Oh? I'm just saying you should get out more often. I mean, look at you, you're as pale as a ghost. Are you going to a funeral or something? You look depressed and gloomy..."

"...Bastard...", Annette's serious face disappears, and in it's place, wrathful indignation!

"Oh, I'm sorry", Vear makes a V shape with her index and middle fingers, "Is that just the way you naturally look~?"

"Uh oh.", Kakra watches the princess's face like a hawk.

"Ruh roh", Ossla puts on her best scooby doo impersonation.

"What're you trying to do? Make this downhearted girl even MORE despondent?", Annette twiddles her fingers in frustration, "Fuckers like you should learn some manners the right way"

[] Attempt to calm down the princess from making a mistake
[] Just let her have at it
[] Launch a full scale bum rush, use the momentum as a slightshot
[] Throw spare elves at the man-eating plants to help Jojo
[x] Throw spare elves at the man-eating plants to help Jojo
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>[X] Just let her have at it

Dis gun b gud.
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Looks like that Alraune Princess needs to call Kenny Loggins.
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>falling for provocation in a Bromont story
Normally that's a fair point. But we've already beat the toughest Boss and area already, so while it's a fairly obvious bait, Annette and the rest of the party are more than likely going to be able to push through.
[X] attempt to calm down the princess from making a mistake
>[X] Launch a full scale bum rush, use the momentum as a slightshot

Hey, if she's gonna get angry, might as well use it.
>[x] Just let her have at it
>[x] Throw spare elves at the man-eating plants to help Jojo
[x] Bum rush
>[] Just let her have at it
>[x] Launch a full scale bum rush, use the momentum as a slightshot
Sorry, can't write tonight.
[x] Attempt to calm down the princess from making a mistake
[x] Throw spare elves at the man-eating plants to help Jojo

Well, alright then.
[X] Set fire to the forest

May as well get the element of panic into the fight if a fight is what it comes to.
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That's okay, will be waiting patiently for your return.
Write when you feel the juices flowing again (so not spreak), we will be right here.

Also, be careful of posting monstergirls that are too risque I know first hand now.
There an archive of these?


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Well shit, I think it's tied.
Between what and what?
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Between everything except calming the princess down.
To break the tie I'll switch from setting the forest on fire to tossing the elves.
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Alright, tossing the elves wins.
Granted the elves are on fire.
even better
Looks like things are on hold until bromont is feeling better

Let's hope the elf body count rises steadily when he returns

Burn, elves!
Second. Purify their heresy with fire.
>hating elves
What faggots
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>liking elves
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>liking durrfs
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>not cute as fuck
>not a million times better than filthy knife ears
>not liking elf slaves
wat do?
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[X] Throw spare elves at the man-eating plants to help Jojo

Annette takes a step forward, the serpent pauldrons on her shoulders coming to life in inanimate anger. Well, that is of course, until the party stops to notice Jojo pissing his pants off in the distance with the kill plants.

"Highness", Athryn openly pleads to the Anubis girl, "Lancer's in serious trouble, we should help him"

"Oh, I suppose I could kill some time before I kill her sometime soon", the Egyptian girl's eye dart suspiciously back to the elves.

The elf girl servants still sharing one bumper kart look as though they've seen a ghost or something horrific, that is the look they express when Annette walks toward them. She carefully and methodically looks them over, prying them apart with her prodding eyes.

"M-Master? Just what are you going to do to us?", an elf girl long blonde hair asks ever so innocently.

"You'll do.", Anny pulls that very elf away from the overdraft vehicle.

"W-", the elf servant struggles in the princess's grasp, "Wait a minute-!"


Annette sinks her fingers into the top of the blonde elf girl's hair and carefully strokes it around.

"What's your name?"


"That's a male's name"

"I'm a boy"

"I honestly could not tell from looking at you", Annette begins to rub the elf's head, trying to calm it down, "Well, Toby, can I ask you a question?"

"Of course, your highness-!"

"Are you fireproof, Toby?"

"-Please your highness, don't-!"

"The light that burns half as long, burns twice as bright", Annette takes out a simple lighter and points towards Jojo, "You're going to go rescue Lancer, understand?"

"B-but those things eating him are HUGE!?"

"Oh, don't worry. They won't catch you if you're on fire", Annette flicks the lighter on and ignites the elf's very flammable clothing.

The elf servant runs around in circles on fire, Kakra kicks him forward toward Jojo and the killer plants, which seem to freak out as much as the flammable elf itself.
...Ivy and Ossla seem to be mildly off-put out by the princess's sudden stroke of cruelty.

"...What?", Annette looks to the Dhampir and Dragon with confusion wrought across her face, "We've got a healer in our party, don't we? What's a few minutes of agony? You don't want to go touch that thing right?"

"I'm not a burn ward transport, you're aware?", Athryn gives the princess a look of disapproval.

"Ah. You'll do fine", Annette grabs a couple more elf servants and lights them on fire, "What's a few more?"

"Whoa! Put down the lighter!", Ivy tries to stop the princess from causing any further damage.

"Ugh... your highness, that's incredibly inhumane...", the Sea Bishop mutters as she/he watches the elves run around the plain on fire, one or two jumps into the nearby fountain.

Within a couple minutes of throwing burning elves at the carnivorous plants, they release Jojo from their spiky grasps and retreat further back into the darker recesses of the forest, fearing the flames and all they represent.

The elves stagger off in varying degrees of burns, it was not known until now just how flammable elves really are. they're like natures little matchsticks.

"I'M ALIVE! HAH! IN YOUR FACE! HOPE A BULLDOZER RUNS THE WHOLE LOT OF YOU OVER, YOU PRICKLY FUCKS!", Jojo proclaims as he rejoins the party covered in plant guts and vine thorns.

"Lancer status, rescued", Kakra salutes off to the princess.

"Please- everyone, stay still so I can heal- stop running around in-", Athryn runs around attempting to help the flaming elves, "Oh, this is a mess"

"Hey, smart thinking, using fire to frighten the plants off me-", Jojo gives the princess a thumbs up.

...Only to have the princess run the lit lighter along Lancer's armor.


"Sorry, habits"
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>They won't catch you if you're on fire
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"...Where'd the plant girl with the sparky vines go?", Ossla observes the now abandoned fountain, saying it despite knowing how much it'd upset Anny.

"Oh, I'm sure she hasn't gotten too far away. I have a strong feeling she wouldn't leave us here to rot alone anyway, now that she knows I'm here"

"We should chase her down on the bumper karts!", the Dhampir girl explains, obviously giddy about returning to bumping things.

Annette covers her Anubis ears back into the recesses of her black hair, and proceeds to give the half-vampire a sheer look of hatred.

"If I catch you having.. having..", Annette openly makes a disgusted face, "-FUN-", she resumes her normal apathetic persona, "Without my permission, I'll shoot you where you stand"

"Oh come on, highness, you love having fun and you know it", the dark skinned ninja girl drives on by the Anubis.

"Only if carefully moderated and scheduled", Annette explains as she hops back into her bumper kart, "Otherwise, it's distracting and needless"

"If you say so", Lily sticks out her tongue and speeds on by, "HEY EVERYONE, CHECK OUT THIS SICK AS FUCK BUMPER KART DRIFTING-!"

"----", Annette leers at the disobedient ninja woman with angered hawk-like vigilance.

And so, our bizarre party begins their continued search for Vear, tempers beginning to ride high from accumulated stress.

-Until they very immediately find her standing before a swamp beside a thick patch of sizeable fungi!

"Well shit, that was fast", Jojo exclaims as his bumper kart continues to go wild in the background.

"That WAS a little too fast", Adena observes the scene with greater detail, "Either she gives up or it's a trap. I don't imagine plants are very fast runners, in any case"

"Oh no~!", Vear feigns panic and covers her forehead in uncertain fear, "I've been discovered~!"
"Oh yeah, she's just acting it up like a total tool", Ossla turns to the green haired sorceress, "Oi, Adena, tell that plant girl to go fuck herself"

"Tell her yourself"

"Alright", Ossla stands up in her seat and wiggles her little dragon wings, "HEY! GO FUCK YOURSELF!"

"Just what is she planning next to those mushrooms?", Kakra carefully checks ever detail before proceeding for the princess's safety sake, "Are they poisonous, perhaps?"

"Is that it? Is she trying to do that whole 'plant spore poison' gag where we can't touch her without getting sick?". the Dhampir shakes her head firmly, "Because poison doesn't really affect me as much as it would a human being"

"Be neither", Ossla shrugs it off, "I'm immune to a fuckload of ailments. I'm afraid she's shit out of luck if she thinks that's gonna save her"

Vear slides slyly next to a hurdle of giant mushrooms, patting them very gently on the cap. No poisonous spores are coming out or anything, perhaps we've all just played too many video games.



"Did one of those... 'mushrooms' just sneeze?"

"Mushrooms, mushrooms... they're not mushrooms~", Vear pulls a thick mushroom close to her.

There's a humanish face with hair, a fully developed female figure, and pretty blue eyes. She looks like a girl trapped inside a mushroom's grotesque figure. It's beautiful in some ways, however.

"Matango-?", Annette's eyebrow rises at Vear's strange choice of comradery, "Just what are you going to do with a mushroom girl, exactly?"

"What, more spore bullshit?", Ossla digs her disinterested chin into her scaly knuckles, "I suppose it's dangerous to Lily and Adena, but we're mostly monmusus ourselves"

"The hell is she planning...?", Adena looks genuinely confused, a bad sign for what's to come.

Vear digs her hands behind her back and pulls out a variety of fine knife cutlery, which she brandishes quite proudly before her.
"Setting your elves on fire-? Ah-? So that's how you use your subordinates?", Vear grabs a hold of the mushroom girl and raises her right hand, "How educational, I'll show you something just as cool in return"

Vear cuts the Matango's legs with a stroke of lightning, uprooting the fungus girl up from the soft soil. The alraune princess hands the Matango a couple of knives and sinks her back into the ground, bulbous top down.

Vear takes a vine attached to her body and wraps it around the Matango's female figure, then begins to unravel the same vine, spinning the mushroom girl on her cap like a spinning top. Vear kicks the spinning mushroom girl with knives forward, propelling her towards the party at an alarming rate.

"..AH", Ossla's intrigued daze is broken as the spinning mushroom nears her with those sharpened knives, "WHAT IN THE NAME OF DRAGONA-!?"

The spinning Matango grazes the side of Ossla's with a screeching metal clash. The dragon girl barely manages to avoid being skewered by a mushroom cutlery tornado-!?

"Ossla, are you alright?"

"I'm not afraid of being stabbed, but I'm afraid of losing my ride-!", the white eyed dragon girl rubs her bumper kart, "Hey-! She scratched the paint job-!"

"AND ANOTHER~!", Vear rips out a second Matango with greater precision and equips it with more knives.

"OH! I've got this one!", Lily throttles her bumper kart forward.


Lily successfully bumps the spinning knife wielding mushroom girl away with a well timed bump.

"Hah. That was cool."

"...", Vear's face begins to contort comically to express her frustration, "OOOOOOHHHHH!"

"I didn't say you could do THAT-! You have no idea how dangerous those things ARE!", Annette grunts as she explains the chain of command to Lily.

"Hey, it's do or die, right?", Lily begins to grind the steering wheel, "This is the greatest thing ever"
Time for Beyblade monster girl edition?
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>not just less interesting orcs
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Vear spins a duo of mushroom girls with knives toward Annette herself, much to the Anubis's apathetic displeasure. Kakra immediately hops in front of her princess's kart and slashes the mushrooms to pieces with her bare fingers.

"This is getting ridiculous, RUSH HER!"

And so, you spend the next ten minutes chasing after the alraune princess, who continually arms a herd of mushroom girls with knives and launches them toward your bumper karts, which in turn bump them away in hilariously awesome fashion.

Vear lifts up some Mandragora, which screech to paralyzingly high pitches. She begins to toss them in with the spinning mushrooms, making it a miserable clusterfuck of plant girl bumper kart fodder. The party responds by covering with their ears as hard as possible and steering with their feet. Ossla steering with her tail.

"Hey, how'd that tail even fit in a bumper kart to begin with?", Ivy whispers to the dragon girl.


The party chases Vear through a maze-like hallway of intertwining trails, going through one avenue after another, in true Scooby Doo fashion. In fact, the theme to Scooby Doo should be playing manually about now.

In one avenue, they run into one another. In another, they run into more spinning mushrooms following them. In another, they run into a boy with a heart problem and lots of disabled Japanese school children. Then finally, they run back into each other and a very surprised Vear.


"Nyaaaah~", Vear sticks out her green tongue at the party, "You losers actually think you can catch me? Hah!"

Vear hovers over the ground like Superman, her super charged roots propelling her across the forest's dirt. Using her vines to slingshot herself to locations, the party crosses backwoods and hidden pathways to catch her.

The party drives inside a weirdly bend circular tree, making a perfect 180 around a circle in true Sonic the Hedgehog fashion.

"This is the absolute WORST"

"I think you mean the absolute BEST!"
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The party shoots themselves into a football field in the middle of the lightning forest, everyone looking just as confused as they should be.

As Vear slides into center-zone, she digs her lightning vines into the hardened soil and electrocutes the flooring. An entire team of living skeletons dressed in football gear rises from the center-zones surface, growling as if to mark their undead arrival.


"Yeah, okay."

The party proceeds to smash into the skeleton girl football players as they tackle the bumper karts. Skeleton bones and football helmets flying every which where. Their souls imploding upon impact into a fine mist of bluish powder.

"It's like Mutant League Football all over again"

"Except we're not tackling the ref every five seconds for no good reason"

"I don't think we played the game right"

"GODDAMN IT-!", Jojo spins his kart around in a panic, "THIS BLASTED SKELETON HAND IS TRYING TO GIVE ME A HANDJOB-!"

"She's just trying to give you a hand", Adena says in the most serious and uncaring voice you could possibly imagine.

The party speeds on through a clearing, exiting the football field and sliding into a avenue filled with trees twisted downwards, forming a makeshift walkway. A bumpy makeshift walkway.

"Hey, Anny~?", Vear looks back to taunt the princess, "Who died, anyway? You're dressed in all black because someone died, right? If not, your fashion sense is laughable at best! Certainly matches that ghoulish face you're sportin' though!"

"----", the pharaoh-to-be opens the palm of her hand slightly.

A wealth of golden serpent roots suddenly weave and bob across the soil unnaturally, latching onto Vear's leg in a matter of seconds and dragging her crashing to the floor.

"I've had enough of your insults for one day, how gloomy can one girl get?"
Vear quickly breaks free and jumps off the side in sheer panic. The plant princess splashes into a nearby yellow tinted lake, embarrassingly ruining what little clothes she still had on.

"---", her face contorts into one ugly frustrated muck of anger, fists shaking at just how salty she's becoming.

...That is, until the mischievous alraune spies a switch on a nearby tree. A lever, if you will. She swims to the edge of the lake and pulls it at once, proclaiming herself the victor.

"HAHAHA! I WIN!", Vear boasts out as the sap thigh highs she was sporting are washing down her legs.

"I think she's lost it", Kakra says with disinterest, "We've got her cornered, perfecto princess. Orders-?"


The yellow tinted swamp water before Vear begins to bubble and oxygenate, the surface sizzles unnaturally and artificially. The lever has done something terrible to the water, no doubt.

"Hehehe, come on~ What are you waiting for~ Too afraid you'll ruin your nails?", Vear taunts the party on with a smile.

"What is this...?", Ossla observes her reflection in the water's surface.

"Doesn't look safe", Annette catches her breathe and nods, "Better send in a elf"

"HEY- WHA- WAIT-!", one of the spare elves is brought forward and thrown into the yellow tinted lake water.


The elf sinks to the bottom like a rock, trying desperately to swim back up but ultimately failing. She's being sucked down by an unknown force-!
"Oh~? Would you like to take a swim to get me, perhaps~? Too far to jump, isn't it~?", Vear points down at the oddly bubbly swamp water, "This here is heavily oxygenated water. Non-buoyant surface. You know what that means? It means it'll suck you down straight to the bottom and keep you there until you drown. There's no getting out either, you'll spend the rest of eternity at the bottom of a swamp-!"

"Looks to be accurate", the party nods as they watch the elf girl below struggling and drowning.


But, in the time it took Vear to boast about her victory, Adena simply walked across the surface of the water and reached Vear's very location in a matter of moments.


"Hi.", Adena immediately bitch slaps the plant princess into a nearby tree and flicks the lever back to normal.
Dont bump so early.
"That took entirely too long given our present power and team layout", says Annette as she rubs her temples, "I really should've planned that better"

"Ah, don't beat yourself up, Princess", Ossla pats the brooding girl on the back, "It's just a really off day, you know?"

"Yeah, maybe you're right, Ossla", the Egyptian princess stretches out her tired shoulders as Jojo and Kakra tie the plant princess down in her own vines.

"Elves are safe and healed, highness", Athryn rejoins the team having fished the nearly drowned elf, the pointed eared girls seem to be touching his/her body very inappropriately, "I've made a terrible mistake"


"Ah, shut up", Lily slaps the plant girl across the back of her head.

"So this is the key, is that right?", Ivy observes a freaky organic keycard with it's own heartbeat, "Freaky..."

"The plan's the same as before. We use the card to get in the back, then we sneak up to the Queen's chamber and set up the pranks", Anny explains with a tired sigh.

"And your slime, right?", Lily makes a comedic gesture with her fingers, "Need your glowing splooge, don't ya?"

"Right, let's not forgot the reason we're here-"

"Just what is that slime FOR, anyway?", Lily tightens the plant princess's ropes a little harder, "Is it really worth all this hassle?"

"Yeah, I'm sorta new here, what's this 'Bizarre Slime' for?", Ivy raises her hand as if she were in school.

"That's really not any of your business, is it?", Annette brushes the mockingly prodding woman, "Needless to say, everyone will be well compensated for your jobs. That's all you need, right?"
"Well, maybe if I didn't face the physical manifestations of my deepest fears in some sort of internet social commentary rip-off after fighting an immortal pharaoh that vomits copies of anything he consumes and a giant crystal dragon that ate like half our party plus an acid pissing slime girl, I wouldn't care so much. But, wouldn't you know it, I'm getting a tad bit curious", Lily finally lets loose a smartass comment to her own boss.

"We're not asking for you to like it. Just trust the princess, it's a very important to the city's future, alright?", Kakra responds in a 'matter-of-fact' tone, "Besides, most of you are outsiders anyway, what do you even care?"

"We did almost die on multiple occasions", Adena says as she pose with those wicked hips, "What could be so important, I wonder? If we came all this way just to discover friendship is the most precious gift of all, I'm going to kill atleast half of you. Lily at the very least"

"I should feel threatened, but I'm more honored than anything", Lily smiles rather sincerely.

"HEY!", Vear begins to struggle harder within her vines, "I'm gonna tell you what. I'm gonna flex my muscles and rip through these vines like they were nothing"

"No you're not", Annette shakes her head with crystal clarity.

"It's happening", Vear begins to struggle harder and harder, "You're going to be so sorry you pissed me off. I'm MUCH stronger than you could possibly imagine. This isn't even my final FORM!"

"It's not happening."

"HHHHHHRRRRRGGGGGHHH...", Vear lets out a variety of deep groans and painful cough, "YOU'RE IN FOR A BIG SURPRISE-! IF YOU DON'T LET ME OUT RIGHT NOW, YOU COULD DIE!"

"No, man, it's really not happening"

"HYYYYYYYAAAAAAHHHHH", Vear stretches so hard she pulls something. After taking a few deep breathes, she calms down, "Alright, I thought I could break free, but it doesn't look like that's happening"

"Yeah, we told you"
"It's just that, I thought in a situation like this, I could go all out and surprise myself by how strong my hidden potential is or something like that, you know? I mean, these are my own vines. You'd think I could will myself out of here or something. This is very embarrassing"

"Maybe you shouldn't be so judgmental and snooty, man. You know?", Lily points to the ropes, "Come on, I've tied more people up than I'd care to count, thinking you could break out is just disrespectful."

"Yeah naw, you're right. I was being a major boner earlier, I'm sorry. If I could take it back, y'all, I would. But what can I say, I had a very sheltered childhood"

"Say, is there a hidden trick to using this keycard or something?", Ivy brandishes the living card key.

"Oh yeah, totally is. Actually, there's a trick to the whole back entrance. I'll tell you if you want, it's cool", Vear gives a very confident nod.

"And you're just gonna tell us how to get past your secret back entrance?"

"Well yeah, you're just gonna torture me if I don't, right-", Vear stops talking for a moment and giggles, "You just made an anal joke, you know that?"

"----", Ivy looks up in sudden realization and begins to giggle, "Oh god, I just did, didn't I?"

"Pffft, secret back entrance", Ossla covers her mouth as she laughs wildly, "Damn it, Ivy. It just now clicked"

"Hahaha", Kakra outright begins to laugh at the crude joke, "Don't make me laugh too hard, or milk will come out"

"Out your nose?", Adena strikes another dead panned joke under the radar.

Pretty soon, everyone is busting up on the ground, laughing their asses off.

"Hahahah", Vear giggles in outright fauxhood, slipping the last knife in her inventory beneath her wrist. She watches as Annette takes a few steps forward for questions, readying for the incoming poisonous strike.


Before her head is separated from her body by a quick sword-like stroke. Lily yells 'WHOOPSIE!' as she accidentally trips and dismembers Vear's head from her body.

Goddammit Lily.
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"-----", the party's laughter ceases, the entire party goes dead quiet.

"Oooh...", Lily notices the knife slip from Vear's headless body, "Butterfingers. I'm sorry, I guess I'm just not very HEADstrong"

"----", the party stares at the ninja woman in sheer astonishment.

"-What? You laugh at an anus joke but I feed you gold and I get nothing?", Lily shrugs and reshoulders her las-blade, "It's because I'm black, isn't it?"

"Lily. Why did you just kill the alraune princess-?", Adena calmly accesses the situation.

"Did you hear the princess earlier? You can't have fun or she'll shoot you. I was just following the rules, you guys are all trouble makers"

"We needed her, to interrogate her", Adena tries to explain very slowly so that even a clod like Lily can understand, "She had vital information, we don't know if she was lying around the key or not"

"You kidding me? Look how overpowered we are! You just skipped an entire boss area because you have that water ring equipped. We've already killed the final boss of the game. Look at us! We're a regular city clearing RPG party. We're broken as fuck. Who cares if it's a trap or something? We can just blow whatever's wrong up, can't we?"

"Just like we did with Zeke when he was captured?"

"Hey, nothing's stopping us from going back there and killing the whole lot of those lightning harpies. I'm pretty sure we can take them"

"Lily", Annette's normal serious face is gone, replaced with hardened anger and hopeless frustration, "I understand this is a hard concept for you to understand, but maybe I don't WANT to murder every party of wrongdoers that annoy me. I have to rule Gharma, if I killed everyone who did me wrong, I'd have no one to rule over"

"You killed like a bazillion werebat girls for no good reason, you're no sparkling sunshine, princess"

"See? Don't you have some personal shit you still need to sort out? Why're you all staring at me like that? Adena, you killed plenty of things. Old man, you killed Adena's sister and shit, didn't you? I'm sure everyone here's dirtied their hands a few times, hell, even Zeke killed a couple bad guys. Like, dead. He shot Pharaoh Phimosis or whatever the his name is in the fucking head with a gun. Why're you giving me shit?"

"Because you DON'T LISTEN!"

"Look, your highness, that wasn't all random occurrence. Look, the plant lady here had a KNIFE, she was gonna use it on you", Lily shrugs it off openly, "I did my job, right? I'm here to help you, aren't I?"

"You saw this and you didn't warn anyone instead? Or merely wound Vear instead of chopping her head off? She was bound, you could've easily taken away the knife"

"Well, I guess in hindsight, sure. But hindsight's 50/50, right?"

"20/20, not... not 50/50"

"Potato, potahto, who cares?"

"I CARE, you didn't have to CHOP her HEAD off"

"She was a plant girl, I thought it'd grow back like a lizard's tail", Lily puts on an apologetic face.

"Did you now?", Adena pries the ninja with her lukewarm stare.

"Hah, naw.", Lily clicks her tongue and points to the sorceress, "Can't put nothing past you, Sparky"

"LILY", Annette screams at the top of her lungs, "Name ONE instance in this ENTIRE quest where you actually did something useful and not just FUCK AROUND the ENTIRE time"

"Just now. What, you blind or something?"

"-----", Annette's breathing becomes raspy and short, she seems genuinely angered and upset for the first time it didn't involve jokes at her expense, "Why are you here?"

"Huh-? I uh... I'm here to help you?"

"You're not helping me"

"Like fuck I'm not! C'mon guys, I'm growing on you like a tumor, aren't I?"

"----", the party looks away from the insubordinate party member.

"Oh what, did I kill any of YOUR family members? I rest my case"
The rest of the party doesn't appear to be laughing with her.

"Lily", Kakra looks to the side and scoffs, "You're really mean hearted and frankly, not great to be around"

"You do didly squat for the party", Adena explains in a seriously apathetic tone.

"You've tried to kill me on multiple occasions", Athryn narrows her eyes above his/her mask.

"You do call me names a lot too, it's not cool", Ivy rubs her forearm in distress.

"You don't listen to a goddamn thing I say", Annette's eyes widen in fury.

"Ah whatever, atleast my good friend Ossla will back me up", Lily slides over to the dragon girl, "Right, best friend?"

"...", Ossla looks to the frantic ninja girl rather pained, "You practiced stabbing me in the chest to look for any weak points"

"Oh. Is that how you're going to do me? I call you my best friend and you turn around and stab ME in the back. Of all the poetic irony", Lily plunges a knife into Ossla's scales, which breaks apart, "You know, you can go fuck yourself"

"I think I wish to liquidate our agreement", Annette speaks out frankly, "I want you out of my group"

"What? Oh COME ON! You're overeating! Look-", Lily gets on her knees and assumes a begging pose, "I have abandonment issues, alright? My parents weren't good to me, I've had a tough childhood-!"

"You never had parents, you're a Black Butterfly member"

"Oh come on-", Lily looks around the group, one by one refusing to even look at her, "-Hey, come on!"

"This was the last straw, consider yourself expelled. Get out", Annette points off into the unspecified distance.

"Et tu.. Jojo?", Lily looks over to Lancer, who's chewed up and scarred to high heaven, "Et tu?"

"-----", Lancer looks around while shaking his head.
"-----", Lily springs up from her begging posture and spreads her arms wide open, "You know what? You don't deserve me. Yeah, I said it. Look at you, and your little goo fucking fetch quest. Oh boohoo, I WANNA BE PHARAOH OF A OCEAN OF ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. I SPEAK TO MYSELF BECAUSE I HAVE NO FRIENDS, WAAAH. I WANNA FUCK THE PRINCESS BUT SHE'S NOT GAAAY. MY FAMILY ARE BAD GUYS, AND I'M GONNA DIE JUST LIKE THEM BECAUSE I ARE BAD, OH NOOO. MY BAD LUCK NEVER ENDS BECAUSE I'M TOO DUMB TO CHANGE CLASSES, CRYING SOUNDS. AND YOU-"

Lily points to Ossla and shakes her head, "I'm sorry, what did you want to do again?"

"I'm a teddy bear connoisseur"

"Really? That sounds absolutely amazing"

"Thank you, Lily", Ossla nods very happily.

Lily trails off and takes a couple steps back from the party, obviously trying to hold back the tears.

"You people are not very fucking nice"

-Lily has left the party!-

The ninja girl throws a smoke bomb and disappears into the forest's colorful backgrounds, her neon ninja clothing providing actual adequate camo.

"---That was intense", Ivy lets out a sigh of relief.

"Talk about an elephant in the room", Kakra loosens up her skimpy collar.

"Well, the plan's still the plan", Annette takes a few more deep breathes, "We've got the keycard, let's ditch the body and head on over to the palace"

"Ah jeez", Ossla begins to sweat nervously at the turn of events, "Atleast things can't be any worse for Zeke, right?"
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"MAFUYA, H-HEY!", the boy tries to calm down the slime girl as she phases through the metal bars carrying a knife.

"Mafuya has been following Zeke the entire time, making sure Zeke would stay safe", the slime girl explains with a slightly demented tone, "Zeke has saved Mafuya's life, Mafuya will keep Zeke safe from anything that might endanger Zeke's life"

"Y-Yeah.. you're my number one nigga, after all... right?"

"But even Zeke makes mistakes. Zeke has to be saved from Zeke's self", Mafuya eyeballs the blue skinned motherly succubus in the prison cell, "Zeke has obviously fallen under the influence of blue demon woman"

"----", Dani gives the nureonago the silent treatment.

"Dani...!", Zeke nudges the succubus in the thigh, "Say something! Tell her you're not doing that-!"

"I can't", Dani looks down at the boy with sympathetic eyes.

"H-Huh? Why not?"

"Because...", Dani grasps her face and smiles so tenderly an angel gets it's wings, "It's so adorable-! Yandere love is the purest form of love, you know?"

"Dani, she's going to STAB you in the FACE-!"

"What must happen, must happen, in the name of LOVE-!", Dani crosses her arms beneath her blue bosom and nods confidently.

"Love...?", Mafuya inches over towards the two menacingly, "Zeke, what does succubus mean by.. 'love'? Inquiring minds want to know"

"She doesn't mean a thing, I'm JUST as confused as YOU ARE-!

"----", Mafuya looks to the boy with her empty black oil-like pupils, "Zeke must come with Mafuya at once, Zeke must abandon whatever it is Zeke is trying to accomplish. It's too dangerous. Zeke will come back with Mafuya and stay safe, does Zeke understand? Mafuya will not let bustas harm Zeke."

[] Tell Mafuya to fuck off
[] Tell Mafuya to stop treating you like a baby
[] Tell Mafuya all she had to do was follow the damn train
[] Tell Mafuya you'll go with her, but only if she spares Dani
[] Tell Mafuya she's acting like a busta herself
[x] Go with Mafuya at once.
>[x] Tell Mafuya to fuck off
[X] Tell Mafuya you'll go with her, but only if she spares Dani
>[x] Tell Mafuya you'll go with her, but only if she spares Dani

Dani hasn't really DONE anything.

Not to say she won't sooner or later, but this is Zeke we're talking about.
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>[X] Tell Mafuya to fuck off
>[X] Tell Mafuya she's acting like a busta herself

Mafuya supposed to be our nigga, but she's bein a turbo busta. Zeke need to set her ass straight. Can't have a ho keepin Zeke down. Ya dig?
>[X] Tell Mafuya to fuck off
Yanderes total listen to you right?
[x] Tell Mafuya she's acting like a busta
[x] Go with Mafuya
[x] Tell Mafuya to fuck off
>[x] Tell Mafuya to fuck off
Wow, what's with the sudden about face with Mafuya? She's best girl.
[X] Tell Mafuya she's acting like a busta herself

You don't go pulling knives and not expect to be called a busta.
Jesus, did we just now finally hit the bump limit?
She's a good girl about to do a bad thing. Can't let bitches (even Mafuya) keep a nigga down.
[X] Tell Mafuya you'll go with her, but only if she spares Dani

I don't want our nigga stabbing use in the chest and nice boating into the sunset, but I really want dani to live
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You know, SBS is structured like a video game.

Kakra - Tutorial
Stage 1 - Rakenmire flying minigame, puzzle/platforming section, Mini-boss Blight, Pharaoh boss
Stage 2 - Tunnel surfacing minigame with fishing skeleton enemies, Mini-boss Blight, uphill climbing section, Dragon/Undine boss
Stage 3 - Monster girl wrestling minigame, challenging platforming/enemies section, Mini-boss Blight, Origami Boss
Stage 4 - Bumper kart minigame with skeleton football players and spinning mushrooms, varied technological forest section, Mini-boss Blight(?), Alraune Queen boss (?)
Bonus level (?) - ??? minigame, ??? section, Mini-boss Blight, Apophis Boss (?)
>He knows
[VN Intensifies]

Anon pls, the only game less likely to ever be finished than the BS VN is Otome Function

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