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/tg/ - Traditional Games

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>One of the Biggest problems in Frontier towns and villages is the issue of Dire fish species such as Dire pike, Dire Trout, DireMouth Bass and Dire carp who will all gladly swim into any channels connecting untamed fresh water sources and make a mess of agriculture channels.

>Hydras live-birth small squirming newt-sized "fry" that wiggle their way into rice paddies, Abandoned Aqueducts, and even refuse channels. They start out small eating catfish, crayfish, and frogs- but in 2 years they grow to be the size of alligators and can have as many as 3 heads.

>Dungeons often become Flooded when it rains and due to this dungeons are often home to creatures such as Dungeon Shrimp, Dungeon Guppies and a Football sized Crustacean known as the "Dungeon Triop". All of whom hatch, feed, grow, reproduce, and die in the span it takes for all the water to evaporate.

>Some of the best -if not most interesting- fishing in rural areas is "Fey kettles" small perfectly circular ponds that are EXCEPTIONALLY deep. These small ponds often contain unusual and beautiful species of Fey fish, Frogs, Turtles, and are sometimes treated as "apartments" for water Nymphs.

>One of the most illustrious and sought after Fish in the world would be the "Illuminated Goldfish". A species of Carp kept as a pet by exceedingly wealthy nobles and eccentric wizards, this fish is only caught on small floating plateaus with pools within the twisting realm of the arcane nether that connects elemental planes and worlds.

>Due to Mimics being a species of "terrestrial Mollusc" many adventurers are disappointed to find that these creatures are in fact perfectly comfortable breathing underwater indefinitely.

>Despite what people might think, some of the most world renown fisherman have NOT been Elves or even Aquatic races, but Dwarves, Humans, Minotaurs, and Cat/Dog people.
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>Undead fish are often met with a loyal cult status among a small group of daring fishermen due to undeath creating a fish that never grows tired and puts up a spectacular fight.

>Fishing in Undead Blighted lands is often considered a suicidal by those who haven't practiced it. But only the few brave know that Undead creatures never seem to bother the quiet serenity of a living being fishing.

>Undead Fish species are often broken down into: Skeletons, blighted, and "natural". Natural being fish who can subsist in an undead environment without being blighted (such as carp, catfish, and snails), blighted meaning undead fish (usually trout, pike, and sturgeon) and skeletal being the obvious skeleton fish.

>Skeletal Fish are often seen with contempt even from fishermen who enjoy undead fishing, as the fish can quite easily tangle lines, ruin lures, and even then be difficult to remove due to their wriggly bony bodies.

>In some particularly blighted and disgusting old-growth undead areas fisherman can often find pools of ROT. These pools are often great for fishing up the most unique species of rare and unusual blighted fish. The process however usually involves cutting of the congealed top and can be very much like disgusting, awful smelling, humid ice fishing.

>A well guarded secret among fishermen who seem to never fall to the undead blight: Carp from undead lands can be boiled and then pickled into a curative that -although is disgusting- can prevent and provide resistance towards undeath's contamination.
need dragonfish/gyarados
That's pretty awesome.

I'm totally stealing that, just so you know OP.

Don't worry, that's kind of the point.
I just like providing/writing fluff.
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>The elemental plane allows for numerous types of fishing: Soft soil, Sand, and Magma. The most common being Soft soil, sand, and Magma in that order.

>Soft soil fishing is often the most difficult to understand by off-worlders as to the untrained eye it seems little more than burying your baited hook in large unrocky areas of soil. But, people quickly warm up to it when they start reeling in catches: Moles, Large worm-like fur covered mammals, and the odd scaled shovel faced dirt fish.

>Sand fishing is however the most exciting with the least amount of danger: large sail boats blown by wind channels created by the Earth plane's cavernous channels. The main item here are illustrious, silver-coloured, vibrating, anvil-headed sand fish. Creatures that swivel and vibrate through the sand with flaky neigh perfectly smooth bodies.

>Water does exist in the elemental plane of earth, but it is often in the form of dripping, trickling, condensation that fogs up on the rocks or very small pools that house only guppies or shrimp.

>Magma fishing is also an option, but it isn't any different than it is in the mortal plane or the elemental plane of fire: Lava Crabs, Lava Fish, Newts and other elemental creatures whom must be quickly either thrown back or immediately crinkle up and perspire due to the temperature change when caught. Amazingly enough: not only edible, but quite savory, sweet, and spicy.

>Another form of fishing can be found in "Mercury swamp": dangerous, terribly toxic, standing pools of mercury home to unusual and inorganic species of purely elemental rock fish and shrimp.

>The Elemental plane of Earth is also home to DANGEROUSLY salty waters and caustic pools of acid that both house organic species of Elemental Tilapia, guppies,and shrimp whom are all edible and quite palatable if washed correctly.
This is better than that cuisine thread the other day, and that was damn good.
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>The Elemental plane of Food has some of the most abundant "water-based" fishing without getting into the elemental plane of water or staying in your own home realm.

>Bodies of Broth, Soup, or Ramen are often both abundantly delicious, readily available, and easy pickings for beginners fisherman to the realm as they carry Fish such as Broth Bass, Cracker Crabs, Pot Sticker Frogs, Fresh water and Saltine Shrimp.

>Oatmeal provides one of the biggest headaches to Fishermen into the realm due to it's consistency and abrassive brown sugar reeds. But, still, fisherman pursue them as the only source for Fat, Soft and fluffy, BreadFish.

Sorry, little tuckered out or I'd do more.
>abrassive brown sugar reeds


Sorry, meant river Banks/sand. Sugar is more of a mineral/sand/soil sort of deal than an actual thing that grows.
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Finally, fishing in fantasy. I love you OP
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Sure, one for you.

>Dragon "ponds" are created when long, slithering, fur-bearing oriental dragons next in burrows by the banks of small ponds. These Dragons will exhale warm water in their sleep and these small ponds can turn into large lakes or even small misty swamps.

>Dragon ponds are often Host to an abundance of illustrious, magical, and beautiful species of fish whom entirely rely upon the dragons for their habitats. Fast growing species of koi, long flowing finned guppies, decorated frogs, and schools of rainbow coloured panfish.

>These Dragon Waters are often more dangerous than Undead waters due Oriental Dragon's regularly stalking their own waters in search of prey: Deer, Water fowl, livestock, and fisherman a like all potential victims.

>The most magnificent fish native to the Dragon pond's is easily the Dragon salmon. A Large alligator sized, fish with DAZZLING colours, this fish spends it's life growing up within the pond or swamp until it has grown to adolescent, after which it uses it's powerful body to swim out into the nearest body of running water to spend it's adulthood in the ocean. Even if the Dragon moves, the Dragon Salmon will still find, lay it's eggs in, and then die in the pond or swamp the Dragon creates.
Are you the same guy who did the cooking thread a couple days ago? You should write a full-on PDF and sell it. Maybe kickstart a printing and illustration.
>no Cracker Goldfish
stopped reading right there.
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Yep, I'm that guy.

I'm severely interested in the more "mundane/world fleshing out" side of Fantasy like Food, Fishing, Ecology, and farming.

It's all pretty interesting to me and I feel as though a lot of Fantasy settings tend to ignore the fact that all that Fantasy would have Fantastic changes on every level no matter how mundane.
This. These are great ideas. Love the "Even the Undead leave a fisherman alone" part.

Is your elemental plane of food like the elemental plane of earth, like, everything's food and there are only little tunnels where you may pass, or is it like a nicer, gentler plane where the ground is food and the sky is blue (kinda like Candyland from Wreck it Ralph)?

The Earth-Plane-like Food Plane is a scary as fuck thing. Imagine drowning in syrup or being crushed to death by pancakes, or getting killed by a Sushi Elemental.
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>The Jormungandr is a sea snake said to be so long it stretches across the earth and bites it's own tail. This however is only slightly exaggerated as this creature "is" long enough to encircle itself around 1 ocean. Each ocean in the world is home to 1 Jormungandr that regularly asexually reproduces hundreds of thousands of eggs at a time. Only 1 or 2 will reach adulthood and live to kill and eat it's parent to replace it.

>Leviathan's are horrible amalgamations of crustacean, whale, cepholopod, and fish and such immense, gargantuan, creatures that only 1 may exist on the earth at a time. These humongous creatures subsist entirely on consuming the horrific monsters of the deep: Sleeping minor elder gods, adolescent Jormungandrs, Whales, Megolodons, and numerous species of Dire beast are all it's prey. Luckily they exist merely to cull the tide of monsterous ocean horrors and anything smaller than a medium sized boat can easily slide through their teeth. Leviathan's give live birth to millions of seal-sized offspring before they die. When they die the leviathan's body creates an island nation sized corpse that feeds billions of organisms and gives back the great bounty the creature had taken.

>The Sea is host to numerous species of Whale both baleen, beaked, Tusked, and toothed and all of them a like (as well as sharks) fall prey to the "Whale Eater". A Humongous Marine Mammal-like Reptile, the Whale Eater as it's name sake eats whales and is so large it's only known predator is the Leviathan.

>One of the most ill-favored disasters in sea-side communities isn't monsters, plagues, or even storms: It's Dire Algae. Great huge Horse Carriage sized globs of vegetation that floats above the bay and smothers it in a 5ft thick veiny, rubbery, flesh-like, mass of vegetation that blankets the waters. Dire Algae SMOTHERS any marine life underneath it: corals, anemones, sea cucumbers, crustaceans, and fish are not safe from the Growth.
OP has captured my attention. Anyone care to give me a foolz link to this cooking thread I keep on hearing about?
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>Is your elemental plane of food like the elemental plane of earth, like, everything's food and there are only little tunnels where you may pass, or is it like a nicer, gentler plane where the ground is food and the sky is blue (kinda like Candyland from Wreck it Ralph)?

The Elemental plane of Earth is just an entirely solid "mud ball", it only has roofs, no sky-line.

The Elemental plane of Food though has a skyline it's like a combination of Kirby, Adventure times (candy kingdom, breakfast kingdom, grocery kindgom etc..) so yeah it's like Candyland from wreck it ralph.

The Elemental plane of food though is still pretty dangerous, I mean, most water sources are usually scalding/bubbling up pools of broth, ramen, soup, sauces or oatmeal.. And the safer ones are 'always-cold' rivers and lakes of near freezing milk.

The elemental plane of food is divided into Meals (biomes), Food groups (genus/animal familys), and condiments, spices, and raw ingrediants making up the sort of elemental chemical scale.

Open Portals to the elemental plane of Food are often closely guarded or otherwise shut down entirely due to cross contamination. The open flowing "Air" of the mortal realm brings in rot and can cause their world to grow stale and mold.
On the other side though the flowing "Air" of the elemental plane of food can bring over spores, crumbs, and bacteria that cause breads, vegetables, and meats to start germinating.
>Food, Fishing, Ecology, and farming.
So those are the four chapters of your book?

Here, it was archived/documented at the 1d4chan wiki.


Most if not all of the Racial Cuisine, Monster Meats, and miscellaneous were written by me.
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Mind I have a go?

>For the exotic fisherman, pay attention to wizard towers or sacred temples near bodies of water. While they themselves are unlikely to offer fishing opportunities on their grounds, run off magical energy often finds its way into the water and allows for special breeds to grow.

>Magic often gestates into breeds such as the Bleak-Faced Gulper known for their enjoyment of dark corners, Thorny Tillfish, small but pesky spiked fish often found in crop irrigation, or the Sun touched Lantern bass often made when sun god acoyltes dump holy water or lose charms in waterbeds.

>For special fish, you often need special bait. visit the local temple and receive manna if possible, fish grown from holy water find these pieces of bread impossible to resist though their divine strength may leave a challenge.

>Preparing these fish is ill advised, gods have struck down many a fisherman for cooking those touched by it. While magic fishes may seem like a fine meal, be wary of unexpected side effects. Arcane energy and the oil in most fish often mingle to create haphazard salves or potions. On the other hand, these scaley sorcerors tend to make great reagents and can catch a proper penny.

>Just beware of the erratic nature of magic. Never go in expecting any type of fish until you see it. Colossal Cods have often broken lines or crushed those who've somehow managed to reel them in.
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>So those are the four chapters of your book?

Well, shit, if you're gonna lay it out for me so easily I don't see why not.

Depending on how long it takes me and how expansive it is I could throw something beefy together including all those topics and sell it on http://rpg.drivethrustuff.com/index.php
i might have to steal this, sir.
Thank you for your magnificence.
Go for it. You could easily make a couple bucks a pop, and once it's made that's free money with no additional work.
You are a magnificent person and I love you for these threads. I love this side to fantasy worlds. I like the dragons and the monsters and all that, but it's the little intricacies that are the most fascinating.
>Sushi elemental
Well, I know what the mad wizard is going to terrorize my player's town with, next.
>You should write a full-on PDF and sell it. Maybe kickstart a printing and illustration.
I second this. I'd back it in a heartbeat. This stuff is great.
Thirding, if it was available in a nice binding.
Technically sugar is derived from reedlike structures, called canes of sugar. However grain sugar that is used in baking and cooking and your morning tea is made by a extensive refining process
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>yfw You go on a fishing trip with fantasy Jeremy Wade
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(This one is for you)

>Around Temples or Areas radiating complete and Total blessed and holy power exists entire PONDS of holy water. Holy water pools "bless" the creatures that dwell within them. Consumption of these fish BURN the wicked all the way down while at the same time elevating "positive" character Traits, curing illness, and making it difficult if not impossible for one to lie.

>Fishermen often avoid visiting Temple pools of Holy water due to Holy Water Elemental: Large radiant, illuminated, humanoids whom exist to keep the serenity and peace of their native Waters. Large Holy sights often dig motes and fill them with holy water just for such purposes.

>If any fish is to be Caught in pools of Holy Water it will most likely be either the Temple Tilapia and Prophet's Pike. The Tilapia themselves are usually a favorite dish at any Holy sight's dinner table and are said to be "heavenly" grilled with a dash of lemon and served with a side of fries. The Prophets pike however is said to be simply a normal species of pike with an abnormal high resistance towards Holy Light: they put up a descent fight though on the line, keep the frogs away, and Monks often use them as a metaphor for the "well mannered Agnostic".
This. A million times this. I would kill for this to be a real thing.
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>You are a magnificent person and I love you for these threads. I love this side to fantasy worlds.

Aw, Thank you so much!
Would you like me to write you up something???
Can we have some good swampfish?
I always have fishernagas and/or crocmen in swamps, but never specify what they are fishing for.
Damn you! You are in the exact niche I wish I was able to do well!

I am going to read all of these and steal your powers! Somehow!

Not that anon but maybe legendary fish? You know ones that are infamous enough to have a name whispered among fisherman as the ultimate or legendary catch?
I guess this is just my Catholic showing, but this post made me think of Lenten Friday fish fries.

And now I want fried fish...
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Swamp fish?
I could do a couple, I can't guarantee anything.

>Orc Crappie
A Pan sized Black and Red fish, the Orc crappie is so named for the affinity the Orc's have for fishing up this little treat and frying it with bacon and serving with sweet potato fries. It's also STUPID common and swims in large schools eating up anything smaller than it's mouth.

>Forked Hydra Gar
This horrifying species of Alligator Gar gets it's name for having anywhere from two to three heads that grow back when severed, Being able to grow larger than an actual Alligator, the Forked Hydra gar eats turtles, other fish, and isn't afraid to stalk humanoids. This fish is infamous for tangling lines with it's multiple heads.

>Ogre Crappie
A Large, Rotund, Fat, Beaked fish that's brown and milk white. This fish is herbivorous and is only marginally related to Crappies. A peaceful fish by nature, this creature is content to happily graze and mind it's own business, but growing to the size of a tub it will defend itself with it's powerful beak. The meat is abundant, juicy, and amazing in stews or gumbo.

>Four Legged Bigmouth
A terrestrial herbivorous sucker fish the size of a pig, this creature has four dexterous smooth skinned arms and legs with ape-like opposable hands and feet. The Four legged Behemoth is slow, fat, and typically crawls either on the bottom of swamps or lakes sucking up worms and shellfish. When it's on land it's either to escape predators or to fill up on grass and rotten fruit on rainy days. This fish doesn't have a beak or teeth, but instead has a Row of Rocky, Gnashing, hard grinding bumps in it's throat.

How are those?
>I guess this is just my Catholic showing, but this post made me think of Lenten Friday fish fries.

That's the idea, anon.

It's a mix of "friday lent" and the whole "jesus totally pulled a coin out of a fish" and 'experts' always say it's a tilapia.
I especially like the bigmouth. I'm stealing all of them. Good work!
How about a handgrenade fish?

Swamp fish that, if her mouth is shut (click, lockdown jaw), and is left to rot for a month, gets bloated with methane and other gasses, while having a bit of phosphorus in there. The scale is very tough, but the internal organs decomposed.

You can throw these at enemies after pricking the skin, the phosphorus ignites the gas and the bones act as shrapnel.
"Aye, lad, carp! Bigger than a dwarf, with fangs like wolves! They say they're descended from Forgotten Beasts and Titans, and they stop at nothing to cause pain to anything that dares approach them! Beware the carp, lad, beware."
>"My pa told me carp are harmless."
I am also stealing that. I like the unusual wilds.

The archer fish is a particular creature living in rivers and swamps rife with thick foliage. Lacking much in the way of prey in the water these air breathing fish suck in water and purse their lips expelling water with such force as to be able to pierce flesh like that of an arrow.

It is not uncommon to find natives dead with near clean wounds entering and existing their bodies hanging from the trees where they attempt to harvest the fruit.
Keep doing your work, assemble it all, do not let this go to waste, that's all I can ask of you.
>that and if you wanted to do something about Island Turtles....
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>DireMouth Bass
I loled
I cant let this die
This must go in the archive.

So the fishing around wizard's towers... It's kinda like that time Jeremy Wade went fishing in a Chernobyl reactor.
Dwarves are legendarily bad fishermen. Their idea of 'fishing is, generally, to wander into a river and try to grab hold of fish. This has lead to the dwarves both reviling and revering carp. Reviling because they're known as murderous creatures craving dwarf flesh, revering because anything dangerous is considered a delicacy among dwarves. The more dangerous, the more desirable it is.

However, dwarven leaders tend to approach fishing the same way they approach everything else; industrially.
Rivers dammed with magma pumped from the bowels of the earth, or diverted into shafts down into the bowels of the earth, through giant gratings to filter out the fish.
They have also been known to practice these techniques on the ocean; setting up a fortress at a shoreline, using complex systems of walls and pumps to create an enclosure, and simply pumping it dry to harvest the sea-life caught inside.
More restrained dwarven fishing usually involves crossbows. A squad of crossbowdwarves stands by the side of a body of water, and simply shoot fish as they swim by, with dwarves further downstream to scoop out the dead ones.
Naturally, all of this infuriates the elves no end. Which is probably half the point, knowing dwarves.
Incidentally, dwarves only have one word for 'fish', which translates as 'aquatic creature'. They don't distinguish between fish species, or even aquatic mammals. Any specific names are usually Human loanwords.
The one exception is mermaids, which translates from dwarven as 'paydirt'.
This in particular is an insight into the dwarven mind. Many years ago, there was a fashion for bone trinkets, with rare and exotic creatures being highly prized. The dwarves saw this, and set up systems to capture, breed, and air-drown merpeople on an industrial scale, discarding most of the creature, and creating stupendous levels of by-catch of other water creatures. Naturally, skilled dwarven bonecrafters flooded the market within a few years, mermaid bones devalued, and production stepped up to meet the shortfall. This continued until human high society learned how the bones were obtained. Outrage resulted, war was threatened, and a compromise was reached to ban the consumption of sentient creatures, and crafting anything from their remains. This had the effect of making the value of goblin skull totems skyrocket, despite the vast amount of them in human hands thanks to dwarven caravans.
Dwarven magma fishing is just as absurd, usually consisting of diverting rivers and underground seas into pools of magma. They then proceed to simply mine out the resultant obsidian, carefully chipping it away from the flash-preserved magma creatures inside. It's dangerous work, but that just increases the value of the subsequent dishes.
My brother had an Ultima Online character that became a D&D character. He was an incredibly skilled fisherman and fighter. And he gained all of his combat skills by fishing up incredibly dangerous things that he then had to defend himself against.
Elves are also terrible fishermen, but out of kindness to the environment rather than hatred and lack of care for it, as with the dwarves.
Instead of using baited hooks, they simply sing to the fish, persuading some of them to sacrifice themselves for the good of the elves.
Otherwise, they farm fish rather than capturing them in the wild, seeing life they create themselves as a necessary sacrifice for their own survival as a species.
This is usually done in enclosures in large bodies of water, but occasionally among the trees, in aquariums constructed from imported dwarven glass.
One cannot help but suspect this practice would come to an end should anyone tell them that the pearlash to make the glass clear actually comes from burned trees.
This is even stranger due to the tendency of elven caravans to dwarven lands to simply not return sometimes, presumably devoured by dangerous beasts, crisped by forest fires, or murdered by dwarven chiefs annoyed by being offered bolts of rope reed cloth instead of the exotic animals they desire.
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Bump for more fish?
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I am incredibly impressed with your ability to steal shit from Dwarf Fortress. Truly your imagination knows no bounds.
Let's see you do better, then. Written anything for this thread?
No, but writing nothing at all is more worthwhile than copypasting shitty DF memes to clog up an otherwise good thread.
I reiterate then. Post something better, or STFU and quit stomping on other people's attempts to be creative.
I bet you used to kick other kids' sandcastles over for not being good enough, or berate people for poorly painted armies.
stop clogging up good threads with your complaining.
>Attempts to be creative
>Stealing Dwarf Fortress memes

If what you did was creative, then fanfiction.net is the bastion of internet literary creativity.
Stop clogging up the thread.
The irony of what you're doing right now is lost on you, isn't it?
I'm just repeating his argument to him, since it applies exactly as well to him as the guy he is chastising.
of course, the idea you can clog up a thread that's only at 50 posts with three paragraphs of writefaggotry is hilariously stupid
I believe the term for it would be "quality control".

If you want someone to jerk you off for your stolen fluff, post it on your blog.
Hook-faced Dragon Tuna
a massive, speedy, powerful ocean fish, the Dragon Tuna resembles a massive bullet tuna, having a longer, leaner body than is typical of other Tunas. it is a terrifying predator, reaching lengths of up to 20 feet, swimming at speeds of up to 50 knots. it uses its unique, almost turtle-like beak as a battering ram, followed by delivering a powerful, crushing and cleaving bite. it is a difficult fish to catch, as the beak has been known to cut practically any line in its mouth, and the fish being too large and powerful for mundane nets, making harpoon fishing one of the only ways to land the beast.

White Lance Marlin
an extremely fast and powerful game fish, the white lance marlin's bill is composed of a unique material resembling ivory, and is amazingly hard and strong. the fish is uncannily fast and agile in the water, measured at 60 knots and seen swimming circles around other sea predators such as sharks. surprisingly intelligent, it has been seen making intentional and tactical decisions in combat with other sea creatures, and even attacking small fishing vessels' nets for food. its bill is a prized trophy, and is frequently made into rapiers or spears by merfolk and other aquatic and maritime peoples.

Prism Trout
A tiny, rare, magical breed of trout, said to dwell under the permanent ice of the northernmost freshwater lakes and rivers. prized more for its magical properties than its edibility or delicate flavor, its fat, when prepared with ice mephit dander and pickled in sub-zero temperatures, makes a potion rumored to grant complete immunity to cold weather conditions or magical cold attacks, and it's scales can be used as a power component in "Pattern" and "phantasm" Illusion spells, "prismatic" or "color-based" spells, or water or cold elemental spells. expending a handful of the tiny fish's scales as an additional component in any of these spells empowers or extends the spell's effect, at the user's discretion.
if you want to jerk off about how much you hate stuff on /tg/, post it on your blog.
I wish I could contribute seeing as I live in a coastal area and did marine studies.

But all I can remember is my time fishing and the types of rope knots for boats. My creativity just isn't switched on this morning.
You're really bad at this. I haven't heard "I know you are, but what am I!" used as a comeback since primary school.
Well go blog about it.
I am entirely uncreative and have never been able to do things like this. But here goes.

The ecosystem of a leviathan:
Lucky fishermen may be able to find the occasional living island, which sustains an ecosystem all on its own. Many of these creatures are adapted to be able to survive on land during the times the creature surfaces.There are dog-sized remora patrolling its surfaces. If one happens to be topside when the leviathan surfaces, the remora hardens in a vertical position, waiting for the next time the creature descends. This behavior makes them seem to be trees from a distance, drawing in the unwary.

Another well known creature is the leviathan puffer, a creature capable of inflating itself to the point that it can be blown away on a gentle breeze. They do this when they start to become dry, to be re-deposited in the ocean.
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Nah, I'd rather sit here and see where your grade-school level comebacks go next.

The simple fact is, you posted really tired memes about Dwarf Fortress and tries to pawn them off as original content in a thread which started off with some great original content by OP. What you posted wasn't clever, it wasn't imaginative, it wasn't creative, it didn't add anything worthwhile to the thread, and you're mad because someone called you on it.
"What the city has gone through this past year," said Percy. "It's lucky, Izaak, that you live down country, and have not suffered till now."

"They say the fire didn't touch the worst of the plague districts," said Marburton. "I would imagine that such large crowds milling and looking for shelter will cause another one this winter. Best we should all leave the city before we drop dead in our steps."

"Since the comet of December year before last, there's been nothing but talk of doom on everyone's lips," said Cotton.

"Apocalypse talk," said Percy.

"Like as not it's right," said Marburton.

They heard the clanging bell of a crier at the next cross street.

The tavern was filling in the late afternoon light. Carpenters, tradesmen covered with soot, a few soldiers all soiled came in.

"Why, the whole city seems full of chimneysweeps," said Percy.

The crier's clanging bell sounded, and he stopped before the window of the tavern.

"New edict from His Majesty Charles II to be posted concerning rebuilding of the city. New edict from Council of Aldermen on rents and leases, to be posted. An Act concerning movements of trade and shipping to new quays to become law. Assize Courts sessions to begin September 27, please God. Foreign nations to send all manner of aid to the City. Murder on New Ogden Street, felon apprehended in the act. Portent of Doom, monster fish seen in Bedford."

As one, the four men leapt from the table, causing a great stir, and ran outside to the crier.
Not even the same guy, silly. I just noticed someone was being a talentless hack on 4chan. You're still doing it.
Both of you, shut up. We've got fish to catch.
"See to the bill, Charles," said Izaak, handing him some coins. "We'll meet at nine o' the clock at the Ironmongers' Company yard. I must go see to my tackle."

"If the man the crier sent us to spoke right, there'll be no other fish like it in England," said Percy.

"Or the world," said Marburton, whose spirits had lightened considerably.

"I imagine the length of the fish has doubled with each county the tale passed through," said Izaak.

"It'll take stout tackle," said Percy. "Me for my strongest salmon rod."

"I for my twelve-hair lines," said Marburton.

"And me," said Izaak, "to new and better angles."
Though, it's hilarious that all your arguments apply directly to yourself.
Walton was in his shirt, sleeves rolled up, standing in the glow of the forge. A boy brought down the case from the upper floor, and now Izaak opened it and took out three long grey-black bars.

"Pump away, boy," he said to the young man near the bellows, "and there's a copper in it for you."

Walton lovingly placed the metal bars, roughened by pounding years before, into the coals. Soon they began to glow redly as the teenaged boy worked furiously on the bellows-sack. He and Walton were covered with sweat.

"Lovely color now," said the boy.

"To whom are you prenticed?" asked Walton.

"To the company, sir."

"Ah," said Walton. "Ever seen angles forged?"

"No, sir, mostly hinges and buckles, nails-like. Sir Abram Jones sometimes puddles his metal here. I have to work most furious when he's here. I sometimes don't like to see him coming."

Walton winked conspiratorially. "You're right, the metal reaches a likable ruddy hue. Do you know what this metal is?"

"Cold iron, wasn't it? Ore beaten out?"

"No iron like you've seen, or me much either. I've saved it for nineteen years. It came from the sky, and was given to me by a great scientific man at whose feet it nearly fell."

"No!" said the boy. "I heard tell of stones falling from the sky."

"I assure you he assured me it did. And now," said Izaak, gripping the smallest metal bar with great tongs and taking it to the anvil, "we shall tease out the fishhook that is hidden away inside."

Sparks and clanging filled the basement.
If you want to catch a legendary demon ray of the deep, you'll need a special lure. Preferably one of enchanted glass that sparkles even in the deepest of waters.
I don't recall trying to pass off dwarf fortress memes as my own brilliant ideas.
Yes, but you're STILL "clogging" the thread and treating 4chan like your own personal blog. You just can't stop being a hypocrite.
A few people in the crowd laughed, but others shushed him.

"In my heart," said the man on the stump, "it is always the Sabbath as long as there are sinners among you."

"Ah, a fig to your damned sneaking disloyal Non-Conformist drivel!" said the heckler, holding his thumb up between his fingers.

"Wasn't I once as you are now?" asked the preacher. "Didn't I curse and swear, play at tip-cat, ring bells, cause commotion wherever I went? Didn't God's forgiving Grace …?"

A constable hurried up.

"Here, John," he said to the stout preacher. "There's to be no sermons, you know that!" He waved his staff of office. "And I charge you all under the Act of 13 Elizabeth 53 to go about your several businesses."

"Let him go on, Harry," yelled a woman. "He's got words for sinners."

"I can't argue that. I can only tell you the law. The sheriff's about on dire business, and he'd have John back in jail and the jailer turned out in a trice. Come down off the stump, man."

The stout man waved his arms. "We must disperse, friends. The Sabbath meeting will be at …"

The constable clapped his hands over his ears and turned his back until the preacher finished giving directions to some obscure clearing in a woods. The red-haired man stepped down.

Walton had been listening and staring at him, as had the others. Izaak saw that the man had a bag of his tools of the trade with him. He was obviously a coppersmith or brazier, his small anvils, tongs, and tap hammers identifying him as such. But he was no ironmonger, so Walton was not duty-bound to be courteous to him.

"Damnable Dissenters indeed," said Cotton. "Come, Father Izaak, let's to this hospitable inn."

A crier appeared at the end of the street. "Town meeting. Town meeting. All free men of the Town of Bedford and its villages to be in attendance. Levies for the taking of the Great Fish. Four of the clock in the town hall."

"Well," said Marburton, "that's where we shall be."

I second this notion. Good god OP you're stellar at this.
They returned to the inn at dusk.

"They're certainly going at this thing full tilt," said Percy. "Nets, pikes, muskets."

"If those children had not been new to the shire, they wouldn't have tried to angle there."

"And wouldn't have been eaten and mangled," said Marburton.

"A good thing the judge is both angler and reader," said Cotton. "Else Father Walton wouldn't have been given all the morrow to prove our mettle against this great scaly beast."

"If it have scales," said Marburton.

"I fear our tackle is not up to it," said Percy.

"Didn't Father Walton always say that an angler stores up his tackle against the day he needs it? I'll wager we get good sport out of this before it's over."

"And the description of the place! In such a narrow defile the sunlight touches it but a few hours a day. For what possible reason would children fish there?"

"You're losing your faith, Marburton. I've seen you up to your whiskers in the River Lea, snaggling for salmon under a cutbank."

"But I, praise God, know what I'm about."

"I suppose," said Izaak, seating himself, "that the children thought so too."

They noticed the stout Dissenter preacher had come in and was talking jovially with his cronies. He lowered his voice and looked toward their table.

Most of the talk around Walton was of the receding Plague, the consequences of the Great Fire on the region's timber industry, and other matters of report.

"I expected more talk of the fish," said Percy.

"To them," said Cotton, "it's all the same. Just another odious county task, like digging a new canal or hunting down a heretic. They'll be in holiday mood day after tomorrow."

"They strike me as a cheerless lot," said Percy.

"Cheerless but efficient. I'd hate to be the fish."

"You think we won't have it to gaff long before the workmen arrive?"

"I have my doubts," said Marburton.

"But you always do."
They stood panting at the edge of the mere. The black sides of the valley lifted to right and left like walls. The water itself was weed-choked, scummy, and smelled of the sewer-ditch. Trees came down to its very edges. Broken and rotted stumps dotted the shore. Mist rose from the water in fetid curls.

Sunlight had not yet come to the bottom of the defile. To left and right, behind, all lay in twisted woody darkness. The valley rose like a hand around them.

Except ahead. There was a break, with no trees at the center of the cleft. Through it they saw, shining and blue-purple against the cerulean of the sky, the far-off Chiltern Hills.

"Those," said a voice behind them, and they jumped and turned and saw the man with the pack. It was the stout red-haired preacher of the day before. "Those are the Delectable Mountains," he said.

"And this is the Slough of Despond."
> Passing off
I never claimed they weren't DF. I was merely fluff-ifying it, mainly because dwarves can't fucking fish.

Again, post creativity or get out the thread. Shit, or get off the pot.

Also, ITT:
> Anon can't write
> Berates others who can
Percy's rod had a butt as thick as a man's arm. It tapered throughout its length to a slender reed. The line was made of plaited dyed horsehair, twelve strands at the pole end, tapering to nine. The line was forty feet long. Onto the end of this he fastened a sinker and a hook as long as a crooked little finger.

"Where's my baits? Oh, here they are." He reached into a bag filled with wet moss, pulled out a gob of worms, and threaded seven or eight, their ends wriggling, onto the hook.

The preacher had started a small fire. He was filling an earthen pot with solder. He paid very little attention to the anglers.

Percy and Marburton, who was fishing with a shorter but thicker rod, were ready before Cotton.

"I'll take this fishy spot here," said Percy, "and you can have that grown-over place there." He pointed beyond the preacher.

"We won't catch anything," said Marburton suddenly and pulled the bait from his hook and threw it into the water. Then he walked back to the cart and sat down, and shook.

"Come, come," said Izaak. "I've never seen you so discouraged, even after fishless days on the Thames."

"Never mind me," said Marburton. Then he looked down at the ground. "I shouldn't have come all this way. I have business in the city. There are no fish here."

Cajoling could not get him up again. Izaak's face became troubled. Marburton stayed put.

"Well, I'll take the fishy spot then," said Cotton, tying onto his line an artificial fly of green with hackles the size of porcupine quills.

He moved past the preacher.

"I'm certain to wager you'll get no strikes on that gaudy bird's wing," said Percy.

"There is no better fishing than angling fine and far off," answered Cotton. "Heavens, what a stink!"

"This is the place," said the preacher without looking up, "where all the sins of mankind have been flowing for sixteen hundred years. Not twenty thousand cartloads of earth could fill it up."
"My name is Izaak Walton," he said, holding out his hand. The preacher took it formally.

"John Bunyan, mechanic-preacher," said the other.

"I hold no man's religious beliefs against him, if he be an honest man, or an angler. My friends are not of like mind, though they be both fishermen and honest."

"Would that Parliament were full of such as yourself," said Bunyan. "I took your hand, but I am dead set against what you do."

"If not us," said Walton, "then the sheriff with his powder and pikes."

"I shall prevail against them, too. This is God's warning to mankind. You're a London man. You've seen the Fire, the Plague?"

"London is no place for honest men. I'm of Stafford."

"Even you see London as a place of sin," said Bunyan. "You have children?"

"Have two, by my second wife," said Walton. "Seven others died in infancy."

"I have four," Bunyan said. "One born blind." His eyes took on a faraway look. "I want them to fear God, in hope of eternal salvation."

"As do we all," said Walton.

"And this monster is warning to mankind of the coming rains of blood and fire and the fall of stars."

"Either we shall take it, or the townsmen will come tomorrow."

"I know them all," said Bunyan. "Mr. Nurse-Nickel, Mr. By-Your-Leave, Mr. Cravenly-Crafty. Do ye not feel your spirits lag, your backbone fail? They'll not last long as you have."

Walton had noticed his own lassitude, even with the stink of the slough goading him. Cotton, Percy, and Marburton, finished with the cart, were sitting disconsolately on the ground. The swamp had brightened some, the blazing blue mountain ahead seemed inches away. But the woods were dark, the defile precipitous, the noises loud as before.

"It gets worse after dark," said the preacher. "I beg you, take not the fish."

"If you stop the sheriff, he'll have you in prison."

"It's prison from which I come," said Bunyan. "To gaol I shall go back, for I know I'm right."
how on EARTH are you writing faster than I can read?
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I'm getting a strange feeling that anon wrote it up beforehand.
He threaded the line, which was thick as a pen quill, through the guides, opened the black case, and took out the largest of the hooks he'd fashioned.

On the line he tied a strong wire chain, and affixed a sinker to one end and the hook on the other.

He put the rod in the wagon seat and climbed down to the back and opened his bait box and reached in.

"Come, my pretty," he said, reaching. He took something out, white, segmented, moving. It filled his hand.

It was a maggot that weighed half a pound.

"I had them kept down a cistern behind a shambles," said Walton. He lifted the bait to show them. "Charles, take my line after I bait the angle, make a hand cast into the edge of those stumps yonder. As I was saying, take your gentles, put them in a cool well, feed them on liver of pork for the summer. They'll eat and grow and not change into flies, for the changing of one so large kills it. Keep them well-fed, put them into wet moss before using them. I feared the commotion and flames had collapsed the well. Though the butcher shop was gone, the baits were still fat and lively."

As he said the last word, he plunged the hook through the white flesh of the maggot.

It twisted and oozed onto his hand. He opened a small bottle. "And dowse it with camphire oil just before the cast." They smelled the pungent liquid as he poured it. The bait went into a frenzy.

"Now, Charles," he said, pulling off fifty feet of line from the reel. Cotton whirled the weighted hook around and around his head. "Be so kind as to tie this rope to my belt and the cart, Percy," said Walton.

Percy did so. Cotton made the hand cast, the pale globule hitting the water and sinking.

"Do as I have told you," said Walton, "and you shall not fail to catch the biggest fish."

Something large between the eyes swallowed the hook and five feet of line.
"Before you join the others, Charles," said Walton, pumping the rod, "cut away my coat and collar."

"You'll freeze," said Cotton, but climbed in the wagon and cut the coat up the back and down the sleeves. It and the collar fell away.

"Good luck, Father Walton," he said. Something plucked at his eyes. "We go to town for help."

"Be honest and trustworthy all the rest of your days," said Izaak Walton. Cotton looked stunned. Something large ran down from the woods, through the wagon, and up into the trees. Cotton ran up the hill. The thing loped after him.

Walton managed to gain six inches on the fish.

Grinning things sat on the taut line. The air was filled with meteors, burning, red, thick as snow. Huge worms pushed themselves out of the ground, caught and ate demons, then turned inside out. The demons flew away.

Everything in the darkness had claws and horns.

"And lo! the seventh seal was broken, and there was quietness on the earth for the space of half an hour," read Bunyan.

He had lit his third candle.

Upon my word, Sir!
Manticore Blowfish
a dangerous tropical salt- and brackish-water-dwelling fish, its head is covered in forward-facing spines that secret a deadly toxin, as is the rest of its body. unlike other puffer fish, its long spines break away easily and regenerate rapidly. also unlike its cousins, when it balloons out, it is less of a defense mechanism and more of a warning, as it will frequently follow this display with a sudden, water-jet-assisted charge towards a perceived threat, delivering a ramming attack with its dangerous toxic spines. it also has a dangerous shearing bite, and frequently reaching 5 to 7 feet in length, can be very territorial of the reefs and clambeds they dwell in and around, making pearl-hunting unusually dangerous in the waters they inhabit.

a fully aquatic version of the well-known sewer-dwelling Ogtyugh, the Ogtyughpus eschew's the usual 3 legs of its land-born counterparts for 3 additional tentacles. a slow and clumsy swimmer, it is none-the-less a dangerous ambush predator and opportunist. they can be easily found near particularly polluted port city waters, in deep, fouled cisterns, along dying reefs, or other places where rot and squalor have taken hold enough to make an appealing home for the ogtyughpus. it is rumored that in the darkened depths of the ocean, there lurks ogtyughpi of immense size and terrible power.
The fish was tiring. Walton did not know how long he had fought on, or with what power. He was a human ache, and he wanted to sleep. He was nodding.

"The townsmen come," said Bunyan. Walton stole a fleeting glance behind him. Hundreds of people came quietly and cautiously through the woods, some extinguishing torches as he watched.

Walton cranked in another ten feet of line. The fish ran, but only a short way, slowly, and Walton reeled him back. It was still a long way out, still another hour before he could bring it to gaff. Walton heard low talk, recognized Percy's voice. He looked back again. The people had pikes, nets, a small cannon. He turned, reeled the fish, fighting it all the way.

"You do not love God!" said Bunyan suddenly, shutting his Bible.

"Yes I do!" said Walton, pulling as hard as he could. He gained another foot. "I love God as much as you."

"You do not!" said Bunyan. "I see it now."

"I love God!" yelled Walton and heaved the rod.

A fin broke the frothing water.

"In your heart, where God can see from His high throne, you lie!" said Bunyan.

Walton reeled and pulled. More fin showed. He quit cranking.

"God forgive me!" said Walton. "It's fishing I love."

"I thought so," said Bunyan. Reaching in his pack, he took out a pair of tin snips and cut Walton's line.

Izaak fell back in the wagon.

"John Bunyan, you son of a bitch!" said the Sheriff. "You're under arrest for hampering the King's business. I'll see you rot."

Walton watched the coils of line on the surface slowly sink into the brown depths of the Slough of Despond.

He began to cry, fatigue and numbness taking over his body.

"I denied God," he said to Cotton. "I committed the worst sin." Cotton covered him with a blanket.

"Oh Charles, I denied God."

"What's worse," said Cotton, "you lost the fish."
Percy and Marburton helped him up. The carters hitched the wagons, the horses now docile. Bunyan was being ridden back to jail by constables, his tinker's bag clanging against the horse's side.

They put the crying Walton into the cart, covered him more, climbed in. Some farmers helped them get the carts over the rocks.

Walton's last view of the slough was of resolute and grim-faced men staring at the water and readying their huge grapples, their guns, their cruel, hooked nets.

They were on the road back to town. Walton looked up into the trees, devoid of ghosts and demons. He caught a glimpse of the blue Chiltern Hills.

"Father Izaak," said Cotton. "Rest now. Think of spring. Think of clear water, of leaping trout."

"My dreams will be haunted by God the rest of my days," he said tiredly. Walton fell asleep.

He dreamed of clear water, leaping trouts.

It just matters more.
Dire Prawns
like their tiny cousins, but scaled up to intimidating sizes, there are several varieties of Dire Prawn, including the Gonneprawn and the Great Opal Mantis Prawn. both use their lightning-fast claws to generate explosive soundwaves that stun and kill, and crushing, slashing, or spearing blows to their prey. the Gonneprawn's sonic attacks are considerably more impressive, sometimes even causing the water at the center of the effect to boil with the force of the blow. the Opal Mantis Prawn's sonic effect is secondary to its brutal claw attacks, but it enjoys the added advantage of being able to generate a hypnotic pattern effect with its scintillating carapace to lure in prey. both have been observed living amongst colonies of Dire Goby.

Whalebane Anemone
a massive Sea Anemone, it can be found along tropical reefs, and some larger specimens have adapted to the cold of the lightless deep. it earns its name from its ability to project harpoon-like tendrils out nearly 100 feet to spear prey and deliver both an electric shock and venom. porpoises and medium-sized sharks are its most frequent victims, while the larger specimens can prey on true whales.
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ambulatory mussells who's shell have formed armored like plates over their hyper evolved "foot"

The Oyster variant secret a special mucus that forms a pearl like eye that enables it possess sub-human sentience and is prized among wizards and psychics as well as being a rare delicacy.
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Well, look at all this stuff in my cute fishing thread!

>Some of the best serene, crystal clear, calm running waters can be found in RUINS of all places: abandoned, overgrown cities, fortresses, or old mage cities, with roads, channels, tunnels all alike flooded from long derelict drainage spaces deteriorating or clogging.

>Ruins are often home to a plethora of both mundane and unique fish species often left to their own devices: Escaped Temple Tilapia left to wander into the main channels from flooded temple waters, Carp and Catfish a like rising up from the nearby drainage latrines, and occasionally Bass or even Pike from Agriculture channels flooding into the city. Ruins are also often home to Dungeon Guppies and Mosquito fish.

>A Good Dungeon or Ruin Fisherman can often eye-ball the Age of a body of water in an abandoned city or dungeon simply by comparing the number of Dungeon guppies to the number of pan-sized fish. If a Fisherman see's at least 5 to 10 Tilapia, Crappie, or even more than 1 large carp it's safe to assume the Ruins have been flooded for at least 2 years.

>Golems are often a problem encountered by Adventurers delving into abandoned ruins or forgotten tombs in search of treasure. Fisherman however due to their disinterest in treasure and love for FISH are almost always treated as "benign" entities and usually completely ignored.

>Due to this unique relationship the image of a Fisherman fishing from the shoulders or back of a sitting golem is often a very popular image to use in signs for angling shops or illustrated in fishing texts.

So are you guys making a pdf or 1d4chan article of this? Cause this is really good.
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>So are you guys making a pdf or 1d4chan article of this? Cause this is really good.

Uhmn, there's a lot of pressure for me to put together a pdf and sell it or something.

But, I dunno, I write this sort of stuff all the time and have never thought of doing it for money. I'm just happy to be writing interesting stuff.
Well if you want I can put you into contact with some printers who aren't too evil? Also some other people who do this stuff for a living if you like?

But honestly I'd just make PDFs and see if you can sell them, or even just normally distribute them for free.
Coming up with fish types is fun. There's a lack of crustaceans in this thread though.

>Suckertongue Yabbie
A six inch long, crayfish like creature, with a long, sticky tongue it uses to catch minnows and smaller creatures like a chameleon. An annoyance for anglers, as they often come up attached to a catch already eating into it.

>Speaking Cockle
These strange clam like creatures have the ability to mimic the utterances of nearby creatures in an imperfect, squeaking pitch. These are particularly annoying for fishermen as they scare away more sensitive kinds of fish with their irritating sounds.

>Rust Crab
This foot-wide crab lives in waters which are full of decaying metal, feeding on the rust and adding scraps of metal to their soft, sticky shells. The presence of a rust crab accelerates the process of rust, and even supposedly imperishable metals start to decay if surrounded by a colony of the crabs.

>Death's Head Crab.
These curious crabs seem to develop only in the skulls of dead animals, their fry drifting until they find a suitable skull to live in and eventually wear. Other than their macabre appearance and nasty, venomous pinch, these crabs are otherwise similar to any number of species.
>But honestly I'd just make PDFs and see if you can sell them, or even just normally distribute them for free.

I think I'd be comfortable trying this before I got any printers involved.
If it garners any popularity as a small project than we could talk about taking it somewhere.
>death's head crabs
Those sound like they be of interest as pets for the likes of necromancers. They're like the tiny, overgroomed dogs of the crustacean world, having owners who go to whatever obscene lengths to get interesting skulls for their pets to grow in and stuff like that
I would like to imagine they have no upper size limit other than the size of the skull, it just takes a long time for them to grow into it and careful cultivation. So, you could have a man-sized crab in a giant's skull.

OP, here.

They sound like they'd make a great Addition to Undead biomes.

Like, they're a living non-undead creature that naturally lives and dwells within undead environments that basically wanders about much like a hermit crab: finding and fighting other Skull Crabs for choice Skulls.

Maybe give it some big meaty claws it could use to dig up graves if it's desperate enough.

Deaths head crab

>>scary as shit horse skull walking arround with a crab in it

>>This is my fetish
Man you're thinking too small. Like a retired barbariana turned crazy crab guy with a whole swarm of the buggers occupying the trophies from his adventuring days.

the fuck did I even type
>with a whole swarm of the buggers occupying the trophies from his adventuring days.

To outsiders he's quite terrifying, but to Necromancers, Druids who specialize in the undead/blighted biomes, and to those pecuilar outdoorsmen they just see him as a Crazy Cat Lady of sorts.
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>yfw imagining a burly barbarian cuddling his death head crab wearing the skull of a man he killed with part of the broken axe head still in the skull
> "Boy, I'd show you the head of the last kid to back talk me, but it crawled into that pond and I can't convince it to come out."
I like you lot
>Rainbow Squibfish
These fish resemble inflated puffer fish the size of footballs with transparent skin. In their body one can see magical energies roiling and flickering. If startled or ruptures, the fish explodes, releasing a random spell such as Silence, Grease, or other minor effects. These fish are of great nuisance to anglers but make popular pets.
What about other aquatic live like turtles and amphibians?

I don't think we got any posted yet
>Shell Toad
Shell Toads are toads with thick, turtle like shells.
Oh, I've got one
The Sporetoise resembles a large tortoise with the cap of a mushroom instead of a shell. Spores constantly billow from the porous flesh of this creature as it swims through brackish, murky waters, keeping the fungus on its back above water, feeding on the muck and small creatures floating through it. The fungal spores cause irritation and nausea in any would be predators, and in turn the fungus feeds on the sporetoise's blood. One sporetoise is enough to ruin a whole fishing trip, so anglers give them a wider berth.
This stuff is great, really great.

I'm trying to compile good fluff for a class project, do you mind if I copypasta this stuff? I promise not to make any money off of it, and I'm happy to slap a "Copywrite [your handle]" if you want.
In a game I was playing there was a crab that could cast Shocking Grasp ~3/day. That's how it hunts. It's immune to/has DR to Electrical attacks. It crawled onto me and I didn't know what it was so I immediately Shocking Grasped it, because Electrical Character. That made it like me.

Naw, it's fine, I'm literally capable of producing so very much more.

Feel free to take as much as you want, it is all good.

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