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/tg/ - Traditional Games


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http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Neckbeard%20Quest
Previous threads.

---

>Hey, why is it so red in here?

"It's this heating system. I turned it on because it'll be getting really cold tonight."
>>
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>I see..

You downed the two souls. You have collected a total of 3 souls, expect a call from your boss tonight.

"So, you said you got your 'shot-term' goals done. What do you plan on doing next?"
>>
>>29670766
>>29670795
ask Charm Dealer how being our minion makes him feel. Try a Dr. Phil approach.
>>
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>>29670870

"I feel like an idiot for letting myself go easy on you when we first met."
>>
>>29671186
>Oh? You ready to go again already~?
>Round Two: Fuck!
>>
>>29671186
Yeah, whatever. So, do you people from /d/ work like seahorses or something? I mean, that reversed genitalia thing going on there. How does that work?
>>
>>29671186
WhatchutalkinboutDealer?
>>
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>>29671310

>Oh? You ready to go again already~?
"No-"
>Round Two: Fuck!
"Not right now!"
>>
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>>29671408

>Fine, whatever.
>So, do you people from /d/ work like seahorses or something?
>I mean, that reversed genitalia thing going on there. How does that work?

"Penis goes into vagina. End of story."
"Now answer /my/ question, what do you plan on doing next, since you got revenge?"
>>
>>29671900
Go to sleep. How much sleep have we be getting recently anyway?
>>
>>29671900
I'm going to spread the good word to the rest of /tg/.

And by spread, I mean lay waste to this place while collecting souls for Beelzefag.

You think that'll do wonders for your business?
>>
>>29671900
Are trolls a thing here? Like not the fantasy rpg kind. The internet kind. Like massive douches. If so nobody would really care if we went, say I dunno, reaping troll souls by the tens? 20s even?
>>
>>29671940
Neckbeard did have a busy day. Woke up after dieing. Visited previous minion. Lost previous minion. Set his post on fire. Visited a bakery. Ended up here.

Eat dinner, then hit the sack. Got any meatbread?
Asked while digging through his stuff.
>>
>>29671900
>What do you mean, "plan"?
>>
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>>29671940
>>29672102

>Eat, then sleep.
>Say, you got any meatbread?

"I got a loaf, but I suggest taking a bath first."
"You smell like death and decay."
>>
>>29672267
...I guess.
>>
>>29672267
>SEXY death and decay, or BORING death and decay?
>>
>>29672267
"Fine, but only because I see a bit of my father in you."
Walk through a random doorway, realize you don't know where the bathroom is. Inquire in a super sleuth manner where the bathroom is.
>>
>>29672267
Yeah, lets take a shower or three.
>>
>>29672267
"Well, there's still more souls to collect. Beelze was kind of vague on what our goal is here."
>>
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>>29672296

>...I guess.
>WAIT
>SEXY death and decay, or BORING death and decay?

"The latter."

Charm Dealer leads you through the door behind his counter, which leads into his house.
>>
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"The bathroom is on the left side, and don't go into my room!"
He was nice enough to not slam the door on you.
>>
>>29673247
Go into his room.

Who the hell does he think we are!?
>>
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The place doesn't reek of booze like your first minion's, and surprisingly doesn't reek as opium.
It's still a mess, boxes, papers and books scattered around, as well for materials for masks and charms.
Despite it being a mess, you still have walking room.
>>
>>29673247
So, is CD a legit male with a vagina, or is he/she not correcting us because it's easier?
>>
>>29673279
Go into CD's room.
>>
Bump. Come on, people!
>>
>>29673279
This is an evil overlord/henchman relationship.
IE, what's mine is mine and what's yours is also mine.

His room is ours. We should loudly declare this then stomp into the bathroom.
>>
>>29673279
Acquire the finest oils available in the room to groom our magnificent neckbeard.
>>
>>29673289
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/29396269/#p29428187
>>
>>29673695
Got it.
>>
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>>29673500

You loudly declare that what yours is yours, and what his is yours, all while stomping over to his bedroom.
The door is locked.
>>
>>29674091
Whatever. We don't want to damage OUR property. Yet, at least.

Let's just take a nice long shower, rack up the water bill.

I don't think we need to see him shower, so let's just fade to black for the moment.
>>
>>29674091
Go have a shower. Deal with his insolence later.
>>
>>29674091
MORALE BROKEN!

Let's go shower.

>captcah sucts hho
>>
>>29674133
>>29674091
Also seconding fade to black - we don't need to watch him take a shower.
>>
>>29674091
List of things to do:
>Shower
>Make sure we're diabolic mastermind here
>Get our (second?) favorite minion back from Garrush and Yorick
>Reap souls of Garrush and Yorick
>Acquire more minions
>>
>>29674133
What are we going to see that we haven't already?

That being said, I think a certain unicorn girl has a raid to take part in.
>>
>>29674264
Doing unspeakable things with the toiletries.
>>
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>>29674134

You hopped into the shower, planning on dealing with his insolence later on.

>>29674202

You made mental notes on what to do. You already got showering down, next you'll make sure you're a diabolic mastermind.
Then you'll get your first minion back from pompadorc and horseless headsman, and steal their souls at it too.

But first, you needed a shower. You have already stripped off your carapace armor from your torso and pelvis, as the armor wasn't able to leave your arms and legs. The ogre horn remains in your anus.

Take this time to change characters or remain as neckbeard?
>>
>>29674439
Change to Garush and Anon. There's an invasion to fight off.
>>
>>29674452
Seconding this.
>>
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>>29674452
>>
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"My post.."

>Anons?
>>
>>29674825
"I'm... fucking homeless..."
>>
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"... My books, my booze.. My computer.."
>>
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>>29674841

".. My fucking alchemy projects."

"Gone."
>>
>>29674861
"It'll... bes all rights. You cans stays wid mes for da times beings."
>>
>>29674861
"Listen, Anons. Yous can stay ats my place for as longs as yous need, alrights?"

"Takes your time. See whats you can finds unburned. I will ask if anyones saw anythings."
>>
>>29674861
>Garrush:
>>29674900
>>29674928

>Anon:
-Swear vengeance against the neckbearded monstrosity
-no, swear REvengeance
-get some training montage afterwards- you can't run forever
>>
>>29674991
Dude, are you nuts? Swearing revenge on the dude who considers us his minion?
Fuck no. We need to report that asshole and find out what the fuck his motive is.
>>
>>29674861
Seconding >>29674991
Neckbeard's crazy and psychotic, and I'm sure being his minion is even more dangerous than not being his minion.
>>
>>29674991
How about we NOT try to kill the bearded monstrosity that is seemingly immune to death. The last time we saw him, fucker had an arrow in his head and was still kicking.
>>
>>29675043
*still licking
>>
>>29675043
Anon also knows that Beardy survived a fight with at least ONE mod.
>>
>>29674861
Does anon know neckbeard did this?
>>
>>29675264
He was present for it.
>>
>>29675264
We don't know for a fact, but it's definitely a reasonable suspicion. We do know that he burned down his own post.
>>
>>29675277
No he wasn't. Charlotte was.
>>
>>29675277
No, the burning happened after Anon split with Garush. Beardy decided to go back to Anon's room, found REVENGE.png, doused everything in flammable liquid, then waited for Charlotte. The rest is history.

At least, that's how I remember it.
>>
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>>29674900
>>29674928

>Listen, Anons. Yous can be stayings at my place for as longs as yous needings, alrights?
>Takes your times. See whats you can be findings unburned.
>I will asks if anyones saws anyth-

"I'mmm goingg to kickk his asss."
>>
>>29675427
"Uh... you knows whos dids dis?"
>>
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"Eeeveeen if I dieee... I'mmm gonnnaaaa kill himmm.."

He's slurring. You made sure he was sober when you left, how did he get drunk so quick?!

"But tha~at won't happen.. Nooooo. Monster will come baaaaack anywaaaaay.."
>>
>>29675427
Anons, we saves that for laters. Right nows, wes make sure we cans be WINNING when we kicks his ass.
>>
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"PFfff..."
"...Anything not burnted wasss loooooted anyways.."
"Eeeven the closeeests empty~!"
>>
>>29675456
"It's okays. We's cans gets somes helps froms the Lurkings Facilitys to replace somes of the stuffs... maybes..."
>>
>>29675456
Go back to Garush's place and pick up Yorick and Mimic. Then we can get gear for everyone.
>>
>>29675456
"Anons, yous musts ask yourself one thing. Yous have losts alots, dis is true. Buts is dis worth dyings over?

I don'ts thinks so. We'll fights, buts nots now. Yous won'ts be fightings da beardy thing until yous are readys. Thens we will fights it togethers."
>>
>>29675530
>...But it'll be awesomes when we's kick his ass.
>>
>>29675003
>>29675043
>>29675064
Hmm, you're right.
First we must make sure that he actually dies when he's killed.

But this thought is too rational for the anon at the moment, so let's rather find out how much alcohol can we imbibe before collapsing and try to beat this record.
>>
>>29675560
Bump. I'm guessing Teli fell asleep.
>>
>>29676273
So, discussion time?

How do we level up cryanon? He has alcohol/tears-based powers, so laws of rpg dictate we should find some ancient primordial booze on quest to self-realization.
>>
>>29676323
We gotta become ZEN again.
>>
>>29676632
So, different inner demons will give different powerups?
We'll need to, at least, powerup our inner crying demon into MANLY TEARS.
>>
>>29676632
if we make peace with all our inner demons we become an avatar of /tg/.
>>
>>29676794
no, we must do something more monumental.
We must accept some people don't like things we like and that's okay.
>>
>>29675560
>>29676323
>>29676632
>>29676760
>>29676794
>>29676868
>to find the greatest booze
>to turn BITCH TEARS into MANLY TEARS
>to make peace with inner demons
>to accept others into your heart

sounds like a plan!
>>
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>>29676897
>My tears are the tears that will drown the heavens
>>
>>29675443
>how did he get drunk so quick?!
Wait, are Anon's tears alcoholic? That would explain a lot.
>>
>>29678352
If the partial awakened status from his dream sequence is real, then yes. Same with his blood and sweat.
>>
>>29679049
>blood
Shouldn't that make it impossible to sober up?
>>
>>29679049
His whole thing's about crying, so just the tears. Pretty sure he's got RAGE and LUST modes, at least. Maybe RIGHTEOUS or something. His normal mode of operation is like a neutral mode of sorts, passive and in control.
>>
Bump for Neckbeard.
>>
>>29675456
weep over the realization that sweet picture of that unicorn bitches ass it gone forever.
>>
>>29683929
We can always take another.
>>
>>29683992
no man that was a one of a kind sweet ass pic that was at the perfect angle and we didnt get caught, it was our little secret ass and all those lewd memories that we have of our time alone with our pants down looking at dat ass while in a drunken sadness will be the only memories there will ever be of that ass. dat ass man... dat sweet sweet ass all gone *cries more*
>>
>>29684095
>Implying she didn't pose for it.
>>
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>>29675466

>It ams okays. We can gets somes helps from Lurkings Facilities to replacings somes of stuffs..

"Tch.. They won't heeeellp.. Wouldn't leeet me inn without uniformmm, annnnnd THAT got burnt to crisp."
>>
>>29684634
what if anon and charlot are in a secret relationship with eachother that they dont want anyone to know about, what if shes not pissed he took the picture but that te let someone else see what was specificaly for his eyes only and now shes going to munish him with that length of rope that she had. what if when the girls were beating him up it was because it was one of his fatacies and asked sharlote to have the girls rough him up a bit and have her stick her horn in his ass butt it would be fine because the girls would think that she would just be doing it to fuck with him but he actualy has a bit of an exabitionist streak. what if they both truely love eachothe when nobody is around
TFW i just wrote fanfiction for the first time ;_;
>>
>>29684958
"Mimics cans makes ones for yas. I thinks."
>>
>>29684958
Then start your own thread then.
>>
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>>29675524

It looks like you have no other choice.

>>29675530

>Anons, yous must ams askings yourself one thing.
>Yous have losts alots, this ams true. But ams it worth dyings over?

"Mmn.."

>I ams not thinkings so. We'll of fightings, buts nots now.
>You ams not be fightings the beardies until you ams ready.
>Thens we will be of fightings it togethers.

".. Let's just gooooo."
>>
>>29685017
"Dids yous haves insurances?"
>>
>>29685017
We can force the lurking facility to take you back.

By using force.
>>
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>>29685042

>Dids you havings insurances-

>"Insurance"
>"4chan"
>>
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"ALRIGHT, BUTT-FUCKS!"
>>
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"Where the fuck are you keeping our white-haired Anon?!"
>>
>>29686058
BATTLEMODE ENGAGED
>>
>>29686058
IS THAT A MASSAGER OR WHAT
>>
>>29686058
Tell them where Yorick is, then see what they do.
>>
>>29686058
Give them Yorick, call her a whore, be pretty much how every drunk is.
>>
>>29686058
"Nots nows, Charlotte. Can'ts ya sees Anons is devastateds he-"

"YOU FUCKING CUNT! DID YOU FUCKING DO THIS!?"
>>
>>29686154
Do this. I'm pretty sure Anon has run out of fucks at this point.
>>
>>29686211
>>29686154
Sounds good to me.
>>
Bump
>>
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>>29686104
>>29686154

You tell them Yorick is at your place, and that you'll be happy enough to give her back, as long as they-
>>
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"WHOOOOOOOOOORE"
>>
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Battle Instigated
>>
>>29688868
>>29686194

This.
>>
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Time to settle this in a civilized way! By laying the smackdown.
>>
>>29688919
Garush: Attempt to negotiate.

Anon: Intoxicating Tears on Anry
>>
>>29688919
Garush, blow Beaky out of the air.
Anon, get in touch with INNER RAGE
>>
>>29688919
Garush: Attack them using your legendary boken: the boken no pico.

Anon: throw acid tears at them
>>
>>29688919
Garush use headcannon on Anry
Anon buff Garush with tears
>>
>>29688919
Garush: negotiate
Anon: Puke projectile.
>>
>>29688919
Garush: Attempt to stop fight

Anon: Acid eye beams
>>
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Rolled 97

>>29689032

Garush commences ARTILLERY BARRAGE on Anry!
Highest number knocks her out.
>>
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>>29689032

Meanwhile, Anon attempts to get in touch with his INNER RAGE.
>>
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"Right.. Where's rage?"

"Nothing but us demons here!"

Looks like this will take a while.
>>
>>29690564
Achieve drunken boxing stance then
>>
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Wow! Not only did you hit a critical on Anry, you knocked her out cold!

It is now your opponents turn.
(I am allowing you to play both you and your opponents on this one.)
>>
>>29690593
Charlotte, horn attack anon
Cyclop, throw a rock at anon
>>
>>29690593
Charlotte: Magical Girl Unicorn Sparkle TRANSFORM!

Blinky: Blend into the background (Opponents -100% accuracy when attacking, Blinky attacking Garush and Anon breaks the illusion).
>>
>>29690593
Charlotte: Unicorn beam Garush
Mako: Bum rush anon
>>
>>29690471
By far my favourite battle image so far.
>>
>>29690896
Didn't see "Unlimited Boken Works," did ya.
>>
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>>29690640

While Mako blended into the background, something magical occured..
>>
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>>
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Charlotte has revealed herself!
>>
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It is still Charlotte's party's turn.
>>
>>29691048
Charlotte: Trample and Gore.
Mako: Gather strength
>>
>>29691048
Charlotte, use Trample!
Mako, use Sneak Attack!
>>
bump
>>
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Rolled 1

>>29691082
>>29691292

Charlotte uses trample on Anon, rolling for gore success.
>>
>>29693305
>1
awesome
>>
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Rolled 31, 12 = 43

Gore successful! You'll leave him bleeding.

Accumulating total damages.
>>
>>29693305
She freaks out about seriously hurting anon. High school aged magical unicorn girls are like that
>>
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It is now your turn.

Anon is bleeding, his wound looks like it will last the entire battle, losing 5 HP per turn.
>>
>>29693510
Anon, Healing Tears.
Garush, Cheap-Ass Win (Unlimited Boken Works)
>>
>>29693510
You find seeing your own blood... arousing?
>>
>>29693510
Anon use healing tears

Garush use hair cannon on Charlotte
>>
>>29693510
Garush: Headbutt.
Pompadour vs. Horn.

Anon: All Range attack: projectile vomit.
>>
>>29693539
Seconding this.
>>
>>29693539
So every fight Garush is going to push an "I win" button?
Cheap ass victories are lame as hell.
>>
>>29693510
Garush, pompadour blast the scary unicorn.

Anon, imbibe alcohol. If we have no source of alcohol, healing tears.
>>
>>29693539
we know we can do this, lets not use it every time, who says that it will work every time as well.
>>
>>29693638
If we had a "mana" system I don't think it'd be that bad.

Either we leave it as it is, and make it a one time use per battle that denies further use of pompadour magic, or we hit it with the nerf bat and tone it down. But it shouldn't be something that we can just mash.
>>
>>29693577
Seconding
>>
>>29693731
I imagine Charlotte's unicorn beam is pretty powerful as well.
>>
>>29693734
We do have a mana system, but Garush has regained mana since last battle.
>>
>>29693785
Maybe they should be build up spells, with the possibility of the enemy interrupting the spell casting by stunning/inflicting damage.
>>
>>29693792
Oh. That's right. Sorry, splitting headache over here. That, and trying to explain to somebody how Planetside 2 works.
>>
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Rolled 33

>>29693604

Garush does not have enough mana for UNLIMITED BOKKEN WORKS.

Anon uses healing tears on his wound, curing it of ailment.
Rolling for healing points.

It is still your turn.
>>
>>29693734
Maybe forcing out of YANKEE form for so long?
>>
>>29693972
Headcannon to Mako.
>>
>>29693972
Pompadour vs. horn.

Charge.
>>
>>29693972
Garush, attack Charlotte with your pompadour.

Use your pompadour magic to steel it, then begin fencing. Show her the power of the Pompadour.
>>
>>29693972
Garush: Tri-Burst!
>>
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>>29694038

You still do not have enough mana for that, either. However...
>>
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Rolled 1

>>29694052

You charge your pompadour at Charlotte, Charlotte doing the same with her horn.
Your two clash, struggling on who will be the successor.
Rolling for success.
>>
>>29694662
Can we devour her mane and add it to our pompadour, or is it only other pomps we can consume?
>>
>>29694662
You could flash your [MANLY PHISYQUE], but she is a horse idk
>>
>>29694704
you sick fuck
>>
>>29694704
But Garush is a gentleman. He wouldn't take a lady's hair.
>>
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Rolled 21

Success! You smack her across the face with your glorious pompadour.
Accumulating damage.
>>
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Charlotte's party's turn.
>>
>>29694818
Charlotte: Shimmering Shield to party.
Mako: Analyze weak points.
>>
>>29694818
Cyclop and Charlotte unite to form the UNICORN RIDER!
>>
>>29694818
Charlotte: Beamu attack Garush
Mako:Punch Anon
>>
>>29694857
But she is sahing herself for some ano..BAKA
>>
>>29694818
Charlotte: unicorn beam anon
Blinky: sneak attack
>>
>>29694857
>Implying a suave motherfucker like Mako's a virgin. Mako's a badass, one of those cool guys who spends all night at the club ignoring the mad pussy that flocks around him like fucking doves in a John Woo film.
>>
>>29694818
Charlotte: Be the bowling ball to their pins
Mako: Sneak attack Garush for massive damages.
>>
>>29694894
You are describing Garrush there.
Mako is a bitch, when Charlotte passes out he will run crying
>>
>>29694990
>Implying Garush would go to "da club"
>Implying Garush would cultivate mobs of ho's

Das not manlys.
>>
try not to break charlotte's horn.
And not rip heads - we must kick the habit.
otherwise, CHAAAAARGE
>>
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>>29694850

Charlotte casts Shimmering Shield to her party, raising protection to 2%.
Mako analyzes that they do not see him and he can totally stab them in the ass if he wanted to.
>>
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>>29694892

Charlotte prepares her unicorm beam, draining all of her mana. She points the horn at Anon.
She will fire the beam on next turn.
>>
>>29695360
Anon vomit on them to make mako visible.
Garush summon bokken
>>
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>>29694892

Mako sneaks behind the opposing party, readying his handy shanking knife.
Alright, Mako, who do you shank?
>>
>>29695386
Wouldn't Garush be the better target?

Anyway, Mako should shank Garush through the pomp, disabling his artillery.
>>
>>29695423
Garush
>>
>>29695423
Garush.
>>
>>29695423
Shank Garush. He's the actual threat here.
>>
>>29695423
Garush. In the ass.
>>
>>29695506
K-kanchou~!?
>>
>>29695423
>Garushs Pompadour takes up half the Image
Have I mentioned how much I love personality of this quest?
>>
>>29695582
Teli should do a vote-comic. Srs.
>>
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>>29695436
>>29695442
>>29695478

You use up all the gathered strength to shank Garush's pompadour, successfully disabling his artillery.

"Guh! You ams cheatings!"
>>
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"It ain't cheatin', it's taking advantage." Mako leaves a smug grin.

It is your turn now.
>>
>>29695727
>Anon use acid tears on Charlotte
>Garush use manly abs to distract Charlotte
>>
>>29695727
Both pile Mako as revenge for the pomp
>>
>>29695727
Anon: Achieve Drunk Zen Demon Attack
Swisgarr: Taunt the horse with manly chest
>>
>>29695727
Anon: Intoxicating Tears on Mako and Charlotte
Garush: Men strike.
>>
>>29695727
Double-Suplex Mako into Charlotte
>>
>>29695750
Well that's just stupid.
>>
>>29695727
Anon: Use Healing Tears to repair Garush's artillery

Garush: Use Expose Chest to stun Charlotte
>>
>>29695727
garush kick his as for being a punk
anon fondle unicorn buts (shift gears into imaginary personality lewd guy)
>>
>>29695750
Yeah, let's pile the guy that ISN'T about to unleash their ultimate attack.
>>
>>29695779
>>29695814

Stupid from the viewpoint of someone who wants Charlotte to lose.
Unicorn waifu is the best.
Also
>Garush too invincible for my liking.
>>
>>29695829
>Complaining he's invincible
>All combat is relegated to dice

Yeeeeeeeah, shut up.
>>
>>29695785
this is the best idea and we should do this
>>
>>29695852
Ok fine, I just don't like him.
Sorry for not being on the Garush bandwagon.
>>
>>29695898
How does it feel? Y'know, being silly ?
>>
Both: Get ready to dodge whatever Charlotte is up to.
>>
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Rolled 2

>>29695750

You both leap toward Mako, readying to pile on him for fucking with Garush's pompadour.

Rolling for success.
>>
>>29696074
Fucking silly anon.
>>
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You both land face down onto the pavement.
Mako continues to look smug as fuck.
>>
>>29696170
TAKE COVEEEEEEER
>>
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"Wow, Garush, I thought you were tougher than that!"
"Maybe Anon's bitchyness is finally rubbing off on you~"

It is still your turn.
>>
>>29696205
Punch Mako in his smug face.
>>
>>29696205
BREAK HORN WITH POMPADOUR OR AT LEAST TURN IT TO SOME OTHER DIRECTION BEFORE IT FIRES I DON'T KNOW GODDAMN
>>
>>29696205
>Anon cry acid tears onto both of them
>Garush flash his manly abs
>>
>>29696205
Note the ominous looking horn and DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODGE.
>>
>>29696205
Cry acid into their eyes! Blind them with your abs!
>>
>>29696205
Garush: Punch Mako.
Anon: Use tear magic to erect a barrier.
>>
>>29696205
Anon: Alcoholic Tears on Charlotte to disorient and confuse.

Garush: Yankee Rush Mako.
>>
>>29696205
>Anon use mana tears to replenish Garush's mana.
>>
>>29696205
>use tears to deflect the lazer
>>
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>tfw Teli has difficulties murdering her favorite source of beefcake

Takes too long, I'll mourn Anon and Swisgarr in the mourning.
>>
>>29697140
>Implying Charlotte, a woman, could hurt that much manliness

She never should have left the unicorn kitchen.
>>
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>>29696272

You both take notice of the horn being charged up and prepare to dodge.
>>
>>29697223
Well WAY TO FUCKING RUIN THE SURPRISE!

And of course Garush is the obvious one to die. Anon and Beardy are technically the main characters if not the same character.
>>
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Rolled 2

>>29696294

>Man, ams hots here..

You remove your coat and slowly remove your shirt, in attempt to distract Charlotte.
Rolling for success, 3 sided die. 1 is successful, as usual.
Charlotte seems pretty focused on firing that laser at somebody.
>>
>>29697254
Anon: Kick Charlotte under the chin to force the beam to fire skyward.
>>
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And she didn't take the cake! Beefcake, that is.

>>29696294

Alright Anon, where do you aim?
>>
>>29697241
>>29697140
It's not his time yet.
Garrush is kamina to our simon, obi-wan to our luke and zyzz to our /fit/.
His death should be more meaningful than getting zapped by random unicorn asshole.
>>
>>29697254
lewd
>>
>>29697358
Charlotte
>>
>>29697358
side of the head, to foce beam to fire Mako-ward
>>
>>29697358

>>29697348
Do dis.
>>
>>29697358
Charlotte's heart
>>
Once (and if) we win, we should totally recruit them into our party.
Probably apologize on Anon's behalf, he is clearly unhinged.
>>
>>29697483
Once we win, I think we're going to have to clear the air once and for all about what the beef is between Charlotte and Anon.
>>
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Rolled 1

>>29697404

Your tears turn to acid, burning your eyes and blinding you. You press down on your lower eye lid and spray acid at Charlotte.
Rolling for success.
>>
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>>29697694
I guess we really melted her heart
>>
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Rolled 13

>>29697694

You may not have directly hit her on her heart, but you definitely struck on her neck.
Accumulating damage.
>>
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Your turn, team Charlotte.
>>
>>29697837
Charlotte: Beamu attack Garush
Mako: Throw a large rock at anon.
>>
>>29697837
Charlotte, shoot Anon since Garush is disabled.
Mako, slap Anry awake.
>>
>>29697837
Oh what the fuck. Did this guy just spray you with green apple colored tears? Oh it is ON. BEAMU HIS ASS.
>>
This thread has become ridiculously schizophrenic.
>>
>>29698016
Elaborate.
>>
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Rolled 2

>>29697862
>>29697898

You fired your beam, but not sure who it hit..

1, you hit them both
2, you hit Anon
3, you hit Garush
4, You completely miss
>>
>>29698059
Well... fuck.
>>
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Rolled 173

>>29698059

Accumulating damage.
>>
>>29698059
Damn girl.
That some payback.
Coulda just busted his kneecaps, but naw.
Unicorn street justice.
>>
>>29698151
OH DEAR LORD
>>
>>29698151
Jesus fuck...
>>
>>29698151
Nigga he dead.
>>
>>29698151
Ouch. Too bad we didn't pick the "hit them both" option.
>>
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>>29698151
>Garush

AAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
>>
>>29698151
>Beam: damage only clothes
>>
>>29698151
"ANONS! NO! YOUS... YOUS BITCHES!"
>>
>>29698151
They're battling the street, yeah?
I think Anon, if he was knocked back, would either be disintegrated or blasted assfirst through several buildings.
>>
>>29698213
>Almost double his max life total
>Surviving

Unless his healing tears granted Autorevive, nigga dead.
>>
>>29698238
I never said anything about surviving, I'm just wondering what happens to the corpse if there's anything left.
>>
>>29698213
Regardless of what happens to anon's body, I'd imagine that many buildings and god knows how many people just got a huge fucking hole blasted in them.

Who knows, it might have even gone into another board. Somebody in /d/ might have finally fulfilled their disintegration fetish.
>>
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Anon is defeated!
And blasted like, a mile away.
A defeated, glittery mess that's a mile away.
>>
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"One down, another to go."
"Give back white hair!"

It is your turn, Garush.
>>
>>29698297
Garush: Berserk mode. Grab Charlotte and beat Mako with her.

That's right: Beat a motherfucker with another motherfucker.
>>
>>29698327
I second this, or a pompadour whiplash into Mako's face from the left.
>>
>>29698323
Pompadour attack Mako from the Left
>>
>>29698323
We believe that we just saw our friend die.
We're normally pretty polite and reserved.
Time to tap into our righteous Orc fury.
>>
>>29698327
>29698327
Thirded.
>>
>>29698323
"Well, befores yous attacked us, we were gonna do that!"
>>
I change my vote from
>>29698377
to
>>29698327
Fourthed.
>>
>>29698323
>"Give back white hair!"
"I WAS GOINGS TO. THEN YOU OVERREACTEDS TO DRUNKEN RAMBLINGS AND THISS MESS STARTEDS."
>>
>>29698442
>>29698388

Damn dice gods, always wanting to be civilized and shit...
>>
>>29698327
>>29698351
>>29698383
>>29698421

>>29698388
Damn son.
>>
>>29698463
Civilized is Garrush's second name.
And right now he is thinking about changing it.
>>
>>29698351
>>29698367
We are pompadour-mind.
>>
>>29698059
>>29698151
Fuck, man.

I always loved the Unikhorn A-beamu
>>
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>>29698388
>>29698442

>I was ams goings to..
>.. Buts then you OVERREACTEDS TO DRUNKEN RAMBLINGS AND THIS MESS STARTEDS!

"Yeah, either bring us to a trap or bring her as a mangled corpse!"

Oh, this bitch.
>>
>>29698700
"...das it. I trieds ta be's nice. Now ya fuckings die."

Rip her horn off and stab Mako in the eye with it.

ORC RAGE!
>>
>>29698700
She's already a fucking demon-spirit possessing a decapitated head, not much we could even do to her.
>>
>>29698700
"By da times I'ms done, yous is goings to be apologizings and beggings forgivenesses."

Suplex the horse onto the cyclops.
>>
>>>>29698700
Seconding this one >>29698745
>>
>>29698700
"Since yours daddys didn'ts, I'm gonna haves ta teaches ya somes respects. A girl dat can'ts respects a guy's feelings ain't no kinds of ladys ats all."
>>
>>29698767
>>29698753
>>29698745
>>29698729

...the fuck?
>>
>>29698753
This.
>>29698745
well, we could do something humiliating, like putting her on roo-
oh.
>>
>>29698700
Reflect the suns light off your muscles into a beamu of your own.
>>
>>29698777
I don't know either man.
>>
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>>29698782

>By the times I'ms of dones, you ams goings to be apologizings and beggings forgiveness.

"W-wait-"
>>
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Rolled 49, 65 = 114

You hastily grab the unicorn, and forcing her over into a suplex, crashing her into Mako.

Accumulating damage. Going by the plus by plus.
>>
>>29699210
Holy fucking shit, did Garush just KO both of them in a single hit?
>>
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Charlotte's turn.
>>
>>29699266
Charlotte: Healing Wave if she's got the mana for it.

Mako: Blend.
>>
>>29699266
Charlotte, gore Garush with horn
Mako, kick Garush in crotch
>>
>>29699266
Charlotte: Heal your party.
Mako: Throw knives.
>>
>>29699266
Charlotte's Party: RUN THE FUCK AWAY

Garush: Don't let them.
>>
>>29699266
Charlotte is not the type to give any quarter. She turned down Beardy's "offer" while everything burned down around her, she won't stop for a pissed off ork.

Gore that motherfucker.

Mako, throw some knives.
>>
>>29699266
Seconding >>29699320
Screw running away - when you start a fight see it through to the end
>>
>>29699281
>>29699299
Seconding Healing Wave. If we do not have enough mana, consume sugary treats to recover mana.
>>
Bump
>>
>>29699266
Thanks for the thread, Teli. See you tomorrow.
>>
>>29699266
Anon is not dead right?
Paralyze in fear, garush aura is too opresive
>>
>>29699266
Consider diplomacy.
>>
When we go back to neckbear, we should give our minion a tongue bath. He doesn't seem impressed by our sexual prowess and that's just a thing you can't allow in a minion. The tongue seems to have had an effect on him too.
>>
>>29700386
>Oppressive
Feminist detected.
>>
>>29704380
>check your privilege... BAKA
>>
>>29705110
Privilege is a myth perpetuated to make a certain section of humanity feel like shit for being who they are. It's terrible, and you should feel terrible for continuing it.

>Implying I'm taking this seriously and not just bumping the thread.
>>
>>29705175
We're on autosage, dumbass.
>>
>>29705197
Oh yeah? Well, you're an idiot.

Okay, I'm sorry, I overdid it.
>>
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>>29705237
>tfw we still get beefcake and Swisgarr didn't get BEAMURUUU'd

no homo
>>
>>29705197

Hi, back from bed. I'll start up a new thread later or sooner, please archive this thread.
>>
>>29706653
yes sir/maam
>>
>>29706768
You forgot the thread number. Oh well, still has the tags. That's more important.
>>
>>29706653
Hey, welcome back.


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