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/tg/ - Traditional Games


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http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Neckbeard%20Quest
Previous threads.

Mako suggested Charlotte that they run. Charlotte refuses to leave the battle.
Anry is still down and out cold.
>>
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Rolled 4

Mako throws a set number of knives, the dice will count. Each knife is 20 damage each.
>>
>>29736969
...Mako is cheap as shit.
>>
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4 knives devastated Garush's health! And torso!
Garush is now bleeding, he will lose 5 hp per turn.
>>
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Rolled 2

Charlotte readies her horn to gore the orc.

1 is success
2 is miss
3 is block with a side of Garush throwing you against your party members
>>
>>29737236
"We gots one chances heres..."

Grab Mako and hurl him at Charlotte.
>>
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Charlotte charges for him and misses completely!
Anry has woken up, wondering what the fuck happened.

It's your turn now, Garush.
>>
>>29737347
Lift Charlotte and throw her at Anry and Mako.
>>
Welcome back Teli. I'm keen for more Neckbeard Quest.

>>29737396
Seconding.
>>
Rolled 10, 10, 6 = 26

>>29737396
Thirding
>>
>>29737396
this just might work...
>>
>>29737396
This, but add "I AMS DONES HORSINGS AROUNDS!"
>>
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>>29737396

You waste no time to grab and lift Charlotte over your head..
>>
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Rolled 55, 40, 30 = 125

... And throw her at the rest of her party.
>>
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Rolled 98, 65, 18 = 181

Accumulating money earned.
>>
Rolled 6, 6, 7 = 19

>>29738156
We are suddenly rich
>>
>>29738156
Remove knives. Flex, closing wounds. Treat Charlotte and company to keep them from dying before we go find Anon and do the same.
>>
>>29738156
getting dosh is good, but stop yer bleedings first
>>
>>29738010
Anry: W-what the fuck? How long was I out f-

>>29738043
Anry: GAHHORSETOTHEFACE!
>>
>>29738267
>getting dosh is good, but stop yer bleedings first
You know, unicorn's horn are know for their healing properties...
>>
>>29738317
We're not the Beardstrosity. Don't even imply.
>>
>>29738267
do we have some cloth to rip into stripes? preferably from someone else to make some bandages
>>
>>29738337
I am not saying that we should shove it deeply into his ass, maybe just rub it over the wounds?

If that fails, put it into his ass.
>>
>>29738610
No horning unless we're beardy.
>>
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>>29738262

You remove every knife and flex your muscles in attempt to close up the holes. You bleed a little less, but you are still wounded and your artillery system is still damaged.

It appears your battle and Charlotte's BEAMU brought attention to the rest of the denizens.
>>
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>>29738262

You check on Charlotte's party to see if they've died.
They're still alive and kicking. You can even hear them groan!

"... A-alright, you win.."
>>
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"Just g-give White back.. Please.."
>>
>>29739127
"You can have her. She's at my place just like I said earlier."

Get Charlotte to cast healing wave or some other kind of healing spell on everyone. She can eat sugary snacks to regain mana if it's required.
>>
>>29739127
"You needs some helps? Here, lets me gets ya to yas feets."

Help her up, brush her off gently.

"Ahm sorry I hads ta hurts yas. I don't likes hurtings girls."
>>
>>29739127
You can have her.
>>
>>29739127
>Check on anon.

Let's make sure he's okay.
>>
I just realized why Neckbeard Quest doesn't get more posts: Once we see two or three even-numbered posts, we don't post suggestions to keep the thread from auto-saging.
>>
>>29739953
You're just now realizing that?
>>
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>>29739978
>>
>>29740083
There there.
>>
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>>29739160

>You cans haves her.
>She ams at my place just likes I saids earlier.
You led them over to your apartment.
>But you ams not goings to be happies whens you findings out..
>>
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But it's always up to you, /tg/

>>29739160

>Here.
>>
>>29740360
Get them something to drink and maybe some bandages. Find out if Torpedo Asshole is still in the sink. Did we get Anon?
>>
>>29740360
Look at the bright side of things.

She can't gain weigth.
>>
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"Huh- oh!"

"HIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
>>
>>29740360
>Go find anon.
>>
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"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"

"Really, pompadorc? You beheaded her?"
>>
>>29740383
"Wes was goings to finds her a news bodys eventuallys, after we gots Anons recovereds and hiddens from da freaks."
>>
>>29740404
TO be fair, we wanted to make her into an awesome banshee weapon.

We decided to find her a new body later on.
>>
>>29740404
Promise to help them find a new body for her as an apology.

But first find anon.
>>
>>29740404
>We's were goings to get her an awesomes new body. Not like lames anons body she had. She'd be stronger thats ways.
>>
>>29740404
"You want I should throws you at yours minions agains?"

Intimidate.
>>
>>29740404
We can make her a new body. Probably.
>>
>>29740529
That failing, we have an awesome onion dip.
>>
>>29740404
And at around this time, Torpedo Asshole decides to comment on this from the kitchen.
>>
>>29740553
Shit, we should take that when we go to fuck up Neckbeard.
>>
>>29740605
Oh, God, yes.

"He does that a lot."
>>
>>29740815
You know, now I'm wondering if Garush has any other disembodied heads hidden away here.
>>
>>29740914
Honestly, I think it's just coincedence that all the heads we've acquired can function without their bodies.
We probably shouldn't become the next episode of Hoarders.
>>
>>29740949
On the other hand, can you imagine firing Torpedo Asshole out of our pompadour? We need more torpedo heads so that we can use them as ammo.
>>
>>29740949
"I... I don'ts knows hows it gots dis bad! Dey... dey just won'ts shuts ups!"

"Whoooooooooooooooore!"

"SHUTS UPS ANONS!"
>>
>>29740383
She seems awfully happy, what is she doing back there? It it because of being reunited with her friends?
>>
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>>29740408

>We ams goings to finds her new bodies eventuallys.
>After we ams gettings Anons recovereds and hidings from freaks.

"Well, you don't have to worry about the former."
Charlotte made her way over to the coffee table, picking up Yorick by her hair.
"I know what she'd like."
"Let's go."
>>
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Select your character.
>>
>>29741303
Anon. We anon now.
>>
>>29741303
CHEST
>>
>>29741303
Charm Dealer
>>
>>29741303
It's tempting to be Mimic, but Anon got Team Rocket'd and I'm curious about him.
>>
>>29741303
Mimic!
>>
>>29741283
"HOLDS ITS! You tinks you is justs walkings outs of heres? I has some questions. Ones, why was you lookings fors Anons. Twos, whys dids yous attacks us? Threes, an dis isn'ts reallys a questions, but you shoulds have somes onion dips an sodas befores ya goes since you probablys needs somes healings."
>>
>>29741303
Damn, I wanted to play the principal at the lurking facility
>>
>>29741303
OP failed to become an hero?

Mimic
>>
>>29741283
>"Let's go."

Charlotte: Be compelled to stay with Pompadorc and Crybaby by BIG ORC ABS and a slim, imagined possibility of witnessing 3D Yaoi.

>>29741303
>Anon
>>
>>29741303
Anonymous
>>
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You are now Anon. You are currently out cold.
>>
>>29741662
Wake the fuck up
>>
>>29741662
Dream about Yorick.
>>
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>>
>>29741662
ey shitlord we have stuff to do still, get the fuck up ya bum
>>
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>Well, shit.
>>
>>29741677
Change the channel
>>
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>>29741677
Change th-

>>29741708
Fuck you anon.

>Check your inner demons status.
Can we still overcome our inner demons? Or was their Acceptance permanent?
>>
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>>29741708

There are no other channels.

>>29741744

Yours demons seem mostly stable. The acceptance is not entirely permanent, as your demons can try to get power over you.
>>
>>29741793
Punch a demon in the dick to assert dominance.
>>
>>29741744
If it is, surely we can bring them into balance with the rest of our being, not allowing ourselves to be crippled by them.
>>
>>29741793
Turn the cable box off and on, that should give picture back.
>>
>>29741793
Demons: Throw sweet rave party. Ride the Id like an unruly hog.
>>
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>>29741848
Not yet, we have to obtain RESTRAINT, CONFIDENCE, and PURPOSE IN LIFE first or we won't be ablt to take on the four demons.

>>29741793
Talk with Alcoholism, or whatever demons is available.
>>
>>29741793
Anon, can't you, like... manifest yourself in your subconscious or something?
>>
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>>29741848

You punch the nearest demon, Lust, in the face to assert dominance.
>>
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"WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR?!"

>I'm just asserting dominance.

"I THOUGHT YOU WERE A ZEN"
>>
>>29742487
Wait: Who's "You?"

And isn't punching a demon breaking our Zen?

Demons: Fuck up the Anon.
>>
>>29742508
>Apologize

Shouldn't piss off our inner demons.
>>
>>29742508
"I am a zen. That makes me dominant. And don't you forget it!"
>>
>>29742553
Got a bit of a laugh from this response.
>>
>>29742510
I think it's Alcoholism.

>>29742553
"THAT MAKES NO SENSE!"

Teli, can you tell us what do we need to overcome our inner demons, or do we have to discover it by ourselves? I suppose we need CONFIDENCE to defeat Fear and Inhibition, and RESTRAINT to defeat Alcoholism and Lust.
>>
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>>29742653
Shit, forgot pic.
>>
>>29742673
Run away crying
>>
>>29742897
noooooooo that was in the past. that's an anon, yasee?
>>
>>29742897
I'm not OP. That's a previous thread image.
>>
>>29742954
Oh, thought you were OP without a trip
>>
>>29743032
I thought that too until I noticed it's a 4chan image number, not OP's index.
>>
>>29742653
I'd rather figure it out ourselves. So far, I think taking FEAR out first could weaken ALCOHOLISM and INHIBITION. LUST probably has less of a connection to it.
>>
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>>29742510

"That makes no sense!"
"You broke the deal, host, now you have to CHOKE ON MY CO-"
>>
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>>29742540

>I apologize. That was out of Zen of me.
>>
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".. Fine. Just don't do it again."
>>
>>29743262
Do it again.
>>
>>29743287
No! Horrible idea!
This is a good chance to discuss our plan of beating the everloving assfuck out of Neckbeard, though.
>>
>>29743262
Throw a giant party to try to wake up anon.
>>
>>29743305
Seconded.
>>
>>29743262
Call an escort
>>
>>29743305
>>29743361
Thirded.
>>
>>29743262
Imagine up a bunch of sluts to party with.
>>
Is there a way to permanently seal Neckbeard in hell?
>>
>>29743362
Awww yiss
>>
>>29743399
The only ones who knew that Neckbeard already died are now dead. He'll probably need to be killed a second time before looking into that.
>>
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>>29743310

You may not have enough people with you for a party, fear and inhibition aren't very good at having fun. But you enjoy having a celebratory drink with Alcoholism. He's an alright guy.

>>29743362

You are now Lust. You take out your mind phone and browse through the list of emotions, feelings and mental states. And you do it discreetly, you don't want Host-sama to notice you calling up people to bone.

Who do you call?
>>
>>29743783
Charlotte.
>>
>>29743783
Let's ring up Chastity and give her a hard time about preventing anon from getting Charlotte
>>
>>29743305
>>29743361
>>29743378
fourth'd

>>29743492
well, we know (mostly because Neckbeard arrived in our house with arrow lodged in his head).

Anyway, our primary goal rght now is to become stronger and less pathetic. We cannot achieve that just by accepting inner demons.
>>
>>29743818
This anon knows what's up.
>>
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>>29743818

Charlotte is only a memory fragment, you still haven't found out how to get that part of your host yet.

>>29743824

You rang up Chastity.

>Hellooooo Chastity~

"Hello again, Lust."
>>
>>29743862
Fifth'd.

>>29744034
Flirt with Chastity, get rejected.
>>
>>29744034
Ask Chastity about Charlotte and why we aren't currently hooking up with her.
>>
>>29744034
"Chastity, why is a lovely thing like yourself busy keeping Anon all restrained, huh? Wouldn't you like to restrain ME instead?"
>>
>>29744034
Ask why Chastity is such a frigid faggot in a teasing way
>>
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>>29744118

>Chastity, why is a lovely thing like yourself busy keeping Anon all restrained, huh?
"I'd rather see Anon get a proper, not-sociopathic lover, whom he would have a chance at marriage with."

>Wouldn't you like to restrain ME instead?
"I don't find you that important."

>>29744120

>Tch, why are you such a frigid faggot, Chastity-kun~?
"Because I am not a harlot like you, Lust."
>>
>>29744201
Hang up and call fetish instead.
>>
>>29744201
"Come over, or I might corrupt anon. You wouldn't want that would you?"
>>
>>29744201
"C'mon, a hole's a hole! And maybe if you'd let him give it to that unicorn bitch, she wouldn't have been able to roast us with her bullshit virgin magic or whatever."

"Hanging up now."
>>
>>29744291
Fuck no. Fetishism would probably horrify us.
>>
>>29744291
That sound like an attack Lust would have, rather than another part of our mind.

>>29744201
"Well, you might want co come over here, lest I keep Anon all for myself~"

Maybe Courage might be up for some fun.
>>
>>29744201
Call Courage.
Probably introduce Courage to Anon - i'm not sure they're familliar.
>>
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>>29744322

>A hole's a hole!
>And maybe if you'd let him give it to that unicorn bitch, she wouldn't have been able to roast us with her bullshit virgin magic or whatever.

"She wanted to impregnate him. That's entrapment."

>Pfft.
>Anyway, come on over, or I might corrupt Anon.
>You wouldn't want that, would you?
>>
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He hang up. What a tool!
>>
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>>
>>29744652
INTERCOURSE INSTIGATED
>>
>>29744611
Wait... impregnate HIM? What?
>>
>>29744611
>"She wanted to impregnate him. That's entrapment."
Goddamn unicorn magic.
>>
>>29744611
Anon isn't from /d/ right?
>>
>>29744692
Charlotte said she would impregnate anon's asshole. I didn't think she could actually do it though.
>>
>>29744652
That's a nice robe. Steal it.
>>
>>29744718
She's a unicorn, of course she could do it. Are you really gonna doubt Charlotte?
>>
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>>29744708
No. Anon is Anon.
The only one known from /d/ is the Charm Dealer.

>>29744635
>That smile.

>>29744652
"You are fast! Were you that exited to see me~?"
>>
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>>29744708

You wish.

"Who else have you harassed?"
>>
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>>29744952

"N-No one, jeez. I just want us and Anon to have fun, no need to hit me like that."

"N-Not that I didn't liked it or anything, Baka!"
>>
>>29745052
>M-maybe you should hit me again, though~
>>
>>29744952
None of your budiness.
>>
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>>29745052

>N-No one, jeez. I just want us and Anon to have fun, no need to hit me like that
>N-Not that I didn't liked it or anything, Baka!
>>
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"Behave yourself."
>>
>>29745357
"Mmm, yes daddy."

"...what the fuck."

Switch to CD
>>
>>29745357
Go check up on anon. Make sure he's not getting too drunk.
>>
>>29745357
War council.
>>
Shit yourself
>>29739181
>>
>>29744611
>"She wanted to impregnate him. That's entrapment."
Nah, entrapment would be puting him in girly clothes.
>>
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>>29745390

He looks buzzed, but not drunk enough.

"Since my body isn't waking up soon, I think I'll go dream."

This sounds like an opportunity for mischief. y/n?
>>
>>29746318
N

Mischief bad.
>>
>>29746318
n. I guess we're the good kind of lust. Go check on Courage, see what he's doing.
>>
>>29746407
Well, anon is browsing /e/, of course we are.
>>
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>>29746386

Oh, fine.
You don't follow your Host to his dreaming, and you just sit there with a raging boner.
>>
>>29746616
Go find Courage and tell him to start hooking up with hot girls soon or else we'll beat him up.
>>
>>29746616
Hijack the host body
>>
>>29748020
Bump
>>
>>29748020
Yesssss. This can only end well.
>>
>>29749653
Bump
>>
Bump.
>>
Back from the brink with you.
>>
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>>29746660

You keep trying to call Courage, but he never picks up.
And whenever you search for Courage, all you find is Fear.
Asshole.
>>
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>>29748020

Yes. Of course.
>>
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>>29748020

It's your turn to pilot the body.
>>
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>>
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"Oh, Yotsuba... Why do you torture me so?"
>>
>>29754594
>Peak under the covers.
>>
>>29754594
which one are we, did we get blasted into someones house, did someone find us and start nursing us back to helth?
either way cuddle with other anon or call them over to cuddle.
>>
>>29754594
Join them.
>>
>>29754594
Is that the OP from Ruby's thread?
>>
>>29754666
SATAN DEMANDS ANSWERS!
>>
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>>29754660
>>29754666

You are now the OP of the thread Ruby once lived in. Or receptionist. However you could call her. You have survived from blowing your lobby to crisp, under Yotsuba's cruel blessing.
You found this boy laying outside in tattered clothing and sparkles, and with damaged buildings left behind. Of course you had to take him in, it's either you or some trafficker pervert, right?
He is still out cold but..

Right now, it looks like you're in a bit of a predicament.
>>
>>29754869
Wake him up sensually.
>>
>>29754869
Turn on your vast collection of granny porn in an effort to unarouse him
>>
>>29754869
Douse him in cold water
>>
>>29754869
Lick him
>>
>>29755002
This, then draw your Walther PPK and point it at his junk.

"Don't get any funny ideas, chucklefuck."

She needs a name. Are we still making her a /k/ommando? How about Kay?
>>
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>>29755110
Or we could name her after /k/'s wafiu
>>
>>29754869
Get dressed.
>>
>>29755169
Why did I expect the letter on her chemise to be a swastika before I opened the image?
>>
>>29755169
>high impact sexual violence ensues
>>
>>29755169
>Jewshit
>/k/'s waifu
I bet you carry in condition fabric.
>>
>>29755110
It's probably Anonymous, like most other people.
>>
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>>29755002

You filled up a bucket of icecold water, then pouring it on him, successfully waking him.
However, this is at the cost of soaking your fucking bed.

"DUAAAHgh-!"
>>
>>29755554
Warm him with your body heat.
>>
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>>29755110

You then drew your Walther PPK, and pointed it at the 'pitched tent' in the blankets.
>Don't get any funny ideas, chucklefuck.

"Wh-what the fuck."
"Where am I, and why are you t-topless?!"
>>
>>29755588
I don't know, it seemed like a good idea at the time!
>>
>>29755588
Take his money and run away
>>
>>29755588
I'm the one with the gun, I'm the one who asks questions! Who are you?
>>
>>29755588
"My shirt was a bit burned in the fire."
>>
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>>29755606

>I don't know, it seem like a good idea at the ti- No!
>I'm the one with the gun, I'm the one who asks the questions!
>Who are you?
>>
>>29755844
I AM LUST
>>
>>29755844
A-Anonymous. My name is Anonymous.
>>
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"A-anonymous! Geeze..!"
"Th-this is your place, right?!"
>Yep.
"Why am I half naked in your bed?!"
>Your clothes were tattered, dumdum.
"Okay.. But uh.. Wh-what are you going to do with me?!"
>>
>>29755889
>All sorts of things
>But mainly sex
>>
>>29755889
well you like like your shivering so i guess i should warm you up with my body heat so make room under those covers boy~
>>
>>29755889
No, what are _you_ going to do with me?
>>
>>29755935
>>29755945
im liking this so lets do it
>>
>>29755889
Put away the gun. Jump in next to him.
>>
>>29755889
Drag him out of the sopping wet bed.
>>
>>29755889
>All these odds

Okay, seconding >>29755973
>>
>>29755889
One, patch you up. Two, send you on your way. You're not my problem, but you just looked so pathetic covered in glitter and blood I couldn't leave you there.
>>
>>29755973
Seconding

Holy shit all these odds.
>>
>>29756059
For this.
>>29756094
Against getting lewd with the obviously unstable arsonist.
>>
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>>29756094

>All sorts of things.
>But mainly sex.

"Wait, WH-WHAT?!"
>>
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>>29755945

>Well, you're shivering and shit.
>So I guess I should atleast warm you up with my body heat, so make room under those covers boy~

You sat right next to the alcohol scented boy in your sopping wet bed. He looks really flabbergasted right now.
>>
>>29756302
Stick a finger in.
>>
>>29756302
stick two fingers in
>>
>>29756302
ask him if he wants to rub our tits to warm up his hands.
>>
>>29756263
>>29756302

Lust: Be in over your head.
>>
>>29756302
Beardy: Burst in like the Kool-Aid man.

"OOOH YEAH! SWIGGITY SWOOTY AH'M COMIN' FOR DAT BOOTY!"
>>
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>>29756342

You stuck two fingers in somewhere you must definitely know where you are sticking them.

>>29756360

You asked him if he wants to rub your tits to harm up his hands.

"Wait.. Wait!"
"Th-that's all you brought me in for? Sex?!"
>>
>>29756542
yes
>>
>>29756542
Well I brought you in to save you from getting molested by some random pervert actually.
>>
>>29756571
this plus "Funny how things turned out."
>>
>>29756571
>>29756599
These are fantastic
>>
>>29756622
they're funnier because they're true!
>>
>>29756542
well we can see where things go from there. I meen you could stay afterwards if you want, gets prety lonely by myself and you were just laying there covered in bruses, what else could i do... we could just cuddle if you want.
>>
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>>29756622

>Well, I brought you in to save you from getting molested by some random pervert actually.
>... Funny how things turned out.

He is starting to look very reluctant.
>>
>>29756727
Add more fingers
>>
>>29756727
"What's the matter? Are you a faget?"
>>
>>29756727
Kay: Put your gun under his chin.

"Bite the pillow."
>>
>>29756727
Lick up his tears
Absorb his secondary character powers.
Upgrade yourself from a D-list participant in the quest.
>>
>>29756727
>Lick up those tears.
>>
>>29756727
"Can we spoon at least?"
>>
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>>29756744

You added another finger, no longer holding back a moan.

>>29756762
>>29756770

You held your gun under his chin, tilted his head up and held him close enough to lap up his tears. They taste like vodka.

"N.. No..."
>>
>>29757045
>>29756414
>>
>>29757045
>"No"? You son of a bitch! What am I, chopped liver?

Throw him out of the bed.
>>
>>29757045
>Continue to drink his vodka tears.
>>
>>29757045
Put the whole fist in
>>
>>29757045
Dammit Chastity, stop holding anon back.
>>
>>29757232
That's not Chastity.

That's Fear.
>>
>>29757045
"No? You're rejecting me? Bastard!"
Slap him and run away crying.
>>
>>29757045
Pistol-whip him.

"What made you think I was asking?"
>>
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Rolled 3

>>29757120
1
>>29757266
2
>>29757288
3

You're gonna let the dice decide on this one.
>>
>>29757411
Someday, the dice will decide against rape. That day is not today.
>>
>>29757411
Beardy: Save your minion!
>>
>>29757580
Well, this is 4chan.
>>
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>>29757288

You gave a nice pistol whip across his face, knocking him down onto the wet sheets.
>>
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>>29757288

>What made you think I was asking?

"Ghh.."
>>
Man, I don't know if it's just me, but the lack of facial features on the receptionist lady just makes her that much more attractive.
>>
>>29757864
You're ready. Take him roughly and violently. Make sure he doesn't enjoy it.
>>
>>29757824
he would sure look nice if he was tied to the bed wouldnt he.

capcha is literaly "you ufreek
>>
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"Looks like I'm winning, Chastity-kun~"
>Because you brought us into this mess!
"Well, if it wasn't for me, we wouldn't be awake by now!"

"Hi! I heard I was at stake!"
>>
>>29757897
Oh no, it's virginity. We should comfort him in his final moments.
>>
>>29757897
Zenon: Bring Lust under control. Through violence if necessary. If he bitches, point out that he's just a manifestation of a part of yourself and that by beating him to a pulp, you're bringing yourself under control. Very Zen.
>>
>>29757984
Lust: morf into Desire and become strong enough to challenge the fun police that is Zenanon. he is not going to fuck this up for us
>>
>>29758035
oh shit going to vote for inner conflict
>>
>>29757984
>>29758035

Both of these.

Wait... if Lust is here, did she knock our asses out?

Virginity: Ascend to the Heavens, your long stay in this demi-plane complete.
>>
>>29757984
>>29758035
>>29758087
we gota have everyone fight for dominance now, fear and inhibitions joining in too
>>
>>29758148
Virginity: Become Biological Imperitive.

Kill them all.
>>
>>29758176
Fear: become Courage

Inhabitions: become Resolve

All out civil war
>>
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>>29757984

It's too late, Lust got what he wanted. You can even hear him repeat PLUCK~ PLUCK~ as he deflowers Virginity.
VIRGINITY has turned into LIBIDO.
>>
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Back to uh.. Anonchan? OPchan?
Kay? Whatever this thread is calling her.

Anyway, you had tied the boy to your bed, and did take him rather rough and violently.
>>
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Man, his alcohol scent is stronger now.
>>
>>29758501
ay boi y u smel liek booze
>>
>>29758501
A man that cries alcohol? He's perfect.
>>
>>29758528
OP-Chan: Say this while Riding anon a little more.
>>
>>29758501
hope you're having almost as much fun as me by now boi toy all tounge tied and straped to my bed~
>>
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>>29758528

>Ay boy, you smell like booze~
"Uh.. Uhnn.."
You roll your rips and began to bob up and down again, getting more noise from him.

>>29758560

The perfect boyfriend. Claim him?
y/n
>>
>>29758984
Y

She's still one of the sanest people anon has yet met.
>>
>>29758984
YES YES YES YES YES
MAKE HIM YOUR SEX SLAVE
captcha: uslavir act
>>
>>29759028
>>29759036
Looks like botching that suicide attempt worked out for the best.
>>
>>29758984
YYYYY
>>
>>29758984
hora hora~ what a cute voice you have, howabout i keep you here and treat you nice like this, so long as you behave I wont be as rough ok?
>>
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>>29759028
>>29759036
>>29759090

>So.. You're mine now, right?
"It.. It looks like I don't have a choice.."
>>
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>Good~!
>>
>>29759319
Kiss him good and long.
>>
>>29759348
Assume control of Ruby's brother.
>>
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"Oh hey, it's me. Your boss."
"I just want to congratulate you on nabbing me three souls. Usually asshats I hire get me one and expect an immediate upgrade. Nah, you got me fucking THREE."
"So, I would like to celebrate by granting you ONE of these upgrades, then you'll get an even better one on the 50 soul mark, capiche?"

"Also, I miiiiiight of given you stun abilities when I sent you back. Seemed like a good idea."

You may Choose:
>Pheromones
Although at this stage weak, it would help you have your way with human denizens of this world.
>Armor upgrade
Adds an additional %2 to your protection
>Status upgrade
Adds an additional 50 points to your HP and MP
>>
>>29759432
>Although at this stage weak, it would help you have your way with human denizens of this world.
>>
>>29759432
>>Pheromones
>>
>>29759432
>Although at this stage weak, it would help you have your way with human denizens of this world.
Because of course we would.
>>
>>29759432
Status
>>
>>29759432

>Pheromones
Although at this stage weak, it would help you have your way with human denizens of this world.

Was there ever any doubt?
>>
>>29759432
>no tongue tentacle upgrade
tell beelze he has bad upgrades and he should feel bad
>>
>>29759432
every time i see you use armor it has been % but you seem to devide it by that number and not percentage. for example 2% armor sould meen 100 damage would be reduced to 98 but what you do is half it so you shouldnt use % because its realy misleading
>>
>>29759567

He will give us better ones when we reach 50 souls. The ammount of souls we have now isin't worth that much.
>>
>>29759605
fuck dude don't point it out
>>
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>>29759464
>>29759466
>>29759462

You have selected Pheromones. Even though you cannot smell it, others can, and it is a nice, sweet scent coming out of your fluffy beard.

"Alright, later!"

You woke up. What time is it?
>>
>>29759692
Smoothie time
>>
>>29759692
Time to feast upon souls
>>29759709
Check your exoskelloteen
>>
>>29759692
Time to get us some souls!
And Weetabix. So it gotta be morning.
>>
>>29759692
snu snu time
>>
>>29759692
adventure time!

wherein we have more adventures, perhaps at a different elf café?
>>
>>29759692
Wait, weren't we taking a shower when we did a character change? where are we now?
>>
>>29759797
Probably the Charm Dealer's house, the morning after.
>>
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>>29759724

Your armor is still the same. Your beard is softer and fluffier after that shower.

>>29759734

Oh right, it must be 6:25 am. Better grab something to eat.
>>
>>29761172
Eat the neighbors
>>
>>29761172
feast upon the soul of that disgruntled looking woman

then check on what made her so disgruntled
>>
>>29761172
Check the fridge.
>>
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>>29761286
>>29761354

You decided to eat the neighbors and check their fridges. You also decided the best way out of there is through the window.

"Hey, where are you going, boss?"
>>
>>29761977
Umm, hungry?
>>
>>29761977
I must consume.
>>
>>29761977
Do not follow.

I will come back in about 20 minutes.
>>
>>29761977
well I was planning on eating your neighbors, but your presence has reminded me that you may not like that

got any food?
>>
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>>29762076

>Do not follow.
>I will come back in about 20 minutes.

"Uh, sure. Whatever."

Which house do you strike first?
>>
>>29762335
The one with the dog in front of it.
>>
>>29762372
Seconding
>>
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>>29762372

You came up to the thread with the dog in front of it. The dog is aggressive, and is barking and growling at you.

"BARK! BARK BARK!!"
>>
>>29762513
>ont of it. The dog is aggressive, and is barking and growling at you.
Use pheromones
>>
>>29762513
Assault dog with penis.
>>
>>29762513
Perfect scenario to test out pheromones!
Don't sex it, though
>>
>>29762513
Eat dog
>>
>>29762704
A soul's a soul.
>>
>>29762513
Recruit dog. Begin giving it orders it could not possibly understand.
>>
I just realized that we're sinking. Only page 4 so far. We have a few hours left.
>>
>>29763141
We are archived.
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Neckbeard%20Quest
Vote that shit up, if you are so inclined.
>>
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>>29762704

You decided to eat the dog, but the dog strikes back!

Battle instigated.
>>
>>29763709
Great thread, Teli!

I have to say, I'm pleased with the introduction of Kay. Seems like Anon has a long road ahead of him of being owned.


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