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/tg/ - Traditional Games


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Twitter: @HeroRena

>Last time on HERO QUEST!
>We found an awakened Dark Witch EdgeMurder without her powers and without her memories. Some stuff happened with her but she's okay so whatever.
>Meanwhile Rena went off to find the evil Lord of Death. She entered his chambers and managed to make a deal with him. He'll work with her so long as Threepunch-Man either apologizes for his prior actions or doesn't show up at all.
>>
>>31474729
BEST TIME OF THE DAY
>>
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>Threepunch Man sits on the top of a mountain, looking off in the distance. His keen eyes can make out several God-Level threats still roaming about. Not even his own father and his allies in the S-Class could defeat these beasts. It was only through great sacrifice that they managed to contain the threats away from one of the only pockets of civilization left in the world.
>He sighs as he recalls his father's legendary attack. The Super Serious One Punch Kill. His father did not enjoy such power but for Threepunch Man being able to do that would be his greatest joy.
>He hears something behind him. Something is climbing up the mountain. But what could it be? No beast should be this close to the city. No human except for that crazy couple would ever leave it. Who...
>Who...

???: "Hey!"

>He turns around and sees a skinny redhead in a sweater poke her head up and wave at him.

What.

???: "Hi there. My name's Rena. You're Threepunch Man, right?"

"Uhm..."

???: "I was wondering, do you like Mario Kart?"

What.
>>
>>31474803
Do not humor the mentally ill, it might get attached to you
>>
>>31474803

Obviously.
>>
>>31474803
Don't just stand there.

MARIO KART.
>>
>>31474803
Oh man, I wonder what the last version of Mario Kart this guy played was?
>>
>>31474803
What the hell is Mario Kart?
>>
>>31474803
Just ignore her. She'll say a bunch of stuff regarding multiversal threats, but it all boils down to apologizing to an S class villain. Perhaps two.
>>
>>31474803
Do you even know what mario kart is?
>>
>>31474803
Why do you need us to tell you? Of course you like Mario Kart
>>
>>31474803
Tell her about the superiority of Tekken and Wipeout Pure.
>>
>Holy Shit!
There was something Saitama couldn't take Down? Damn, man I'm gonna need a moment to let my mind process this
>>
>>31474803
"I... kinda prefer Kirby Air Ride."
>>
>>31474803
Ignore the red head, red heads are evil soulless creature
>>
>>31474946
City Trial for life
>>
>>31474960
huh. That might explain why evil Rena isn't pinging on the God level thread indicator
>>
>>31474916
>3D fighter
>superiority
Even if it's a joke, that's a disgusting thought.
>>
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"I... I'm not a huge fan of the series."

Everyone knows Kirby is better.

R: "Oh, that's fine! I have other games. Hold on..."

>The girl looks through her bag and pulls out some odd looking electronics.

R: "I got two 3DS and a bunch of games. Pokemon, Mario, Mario, Mario, Zelda, Street Fighter, Heroes vs Villains."

What in the world are those things.

>>31474843
"Listen, kid, I'm kinda meditating up here. Can you leave me alone?"

R: "Huh? Oh... You don't like games?"

"It's less games and more people who talk."

R: "Well then I guess I'll try and make this quick. You need to apologize to Lord of Death for whatever you did."

>For a moment Threepunch Man's mind flashes back to his younger teen years. A date with the Lord of Death before she became the Lord of Death. A new video game was coming out so he ended up standing the girl up to wait in line.

"Hell no."

R: "But... If you don't the world is going to die."
>>
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>>31474803
>Sonitama
>>
>>31474999
It wasn't always 3D.
>>
>>31475043
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tuL4IaCf4qM
>>
>>31475043
"Because I'm going to kill it."
>>
>>31475043
Woolie pls
>>
>>31475043
The world already ended
>>
>>31475043
You stood her up for a game!

Your a dick man, what would your father say!

You could had at least postpone the date, or let her know beforehand.
>>
>>31475043
So basically you created a supervillain.

Nice going hero. Now get that stick out your ass and apologize. Even if you're as asexual as Rena, it was still a dick move.
>>
>>31475081
Oh. Rena.

He wants to meditate?


Dude needs Tetris
>>
>>31475043
Don't be faggot Sonitama, if you stood the girl up go and apologize like a proper man should.
>>
>>31475063
Oh, in that case it's my mistake. I never played the earlier Tekken games since I played either 4 or 5 and wrote off the whole series as shit.
>>
>>31475043
Be a man and apologise already I mean really what are a faggot?
>>
>>31475062
>Sonitama
I'm missing the non-OPM half of that reference
>>
>>31475043
You a fag who no apology
>>
>>31474803
well?
DO you like mario kart?
>>
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>>31475097
>>31475106
What? I'm not asexual. I just... It was a really good game. But now that I think about it I can't even remember what it was about. It might've been a fighting game. I've always liked those.
But that was decades ago. Does she still really care about that?

"Kid, the world's already ended. What else could happen?"

R: "Everyone in the city dying."

"If something actually threatens the entire city I will kill it."

R: "You can't. Not alone. That's why we need the two of you to work together."

>>31475231
...
But it wasn't even that big of a deal. I didn't think she would flip out that bad and master the One Touch Kill.
Who the fuck holds onto a grudge for that long?

R: "Please, Mr. Threepunch Man."
>>
You clearly need to beat Rena in a game in order to make her go away, otherwise she'll keep pestering you.
>>
>>31475277
>Who the fuck holds onto a grudge for that long?
the ladies.

How do you not know this?
>>
>>31475277
Reflect the truth on your shiny head and know that the nutter speaks valid.
>>
>>31475277
>Who the fuck holds onto a grudge for that long?
You really don't know much about women, do you?
>>
>>31475277

Hey, TRUST US guy.
Friendships can be -ruined- over videogames.

What you did probably was that.

You need to apologize.
>>
>>31475277
Well if it's not a big deal then it isnt a big deal to apologize about either. Honestly man, it's not hard to say sorry. Or are you not MAN ENOUGH?
>>
>>31475277
Uh, being infinitely self-assured that it's obviously not a big deal to her because it wasn't a big deal to you just makes you look like MORE of a jerk, not less.
>>
>>31475087
Mahvel?
>>
>>31475277
A woman, your a guy and even you shouldn't be stupid enough to piss off a women.

Think of it like your mom, you know you did something bad, she'll get pissed.

Same concept but for someone who'll hate you more.

Idiot.

Also when did you start hearing voices?
>>
>>31475253
he is saitama's son
>>
>>31475277
>Who the fuck holds onto a grudge for that long?
A woman that's who, god, you are a dense mofo.
>>
>>31475328
>Also when did you start hearing voices?

He put a game over a girl. He's already one of us.
>>
>>31475435
>
Wouldn't that be a bit recursive?
>>
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I... But it really wasn't that big of a deal. It was just a game. I even invited her to come by and play it with me.

"No. Besides, you haven't even told me what it is we're fighting."

>Rena explains everything as best as she can. The man looks like he believes her but at the end he shakes his head.
>He tells her why Lord of Death is so mad at him.

R: "What!?"

"... What?"

R: "That's so not cool!"

"You too?"

R: "You can't just break a girl's heart like that! They're delicate things. And she loved you and everything. You should go apologize right now!"

"I..."

R: "Come on. Go. Even if you two don't work together this is a stupid reason to not talk to someone."

>>31475315
>>31475304
>>31475303
>>31475302
>>31475298
....

"Fine. I'll go. But I doubt she would accept it.

R: "That's fine, so long as you really say you're sorry."

How... How the hell do I even word this? It's been years since we last spoke to each other. And it was mostly banter as we were fighting.
>>
>>31475483
rub the back of your head.
Look down at the ground awkwardly.
Mumble a lot.
Sweat.
Say you're sorry.
Blush.
>>
>>31475483
whatever you do, do not scream the words 'I AM THE CONDUCTOR OF THE POOP TRAIN' at the top of your lungs
>>
>>31475483
"I'm sorry I got a game that I can't even remember now instead of going out on that date with you."
>>
>>31475483
Dude, my wife and I get into fights about video games, and she's a gamer too.

Also spending too much time questing here and talking to fine fellows like yourself.

Trust this girl.

She can save everyone. Even you
>>
>>31475483
Just say Sorry and mean it, you bald bastard!

Also pot calling the kettle black rena....
>>
>>31475483
"I'm sorry"

It's not hard.
>>
>>31475483
Know that cheesy lovey dovey shit that gets written on cards? Say something like that. But mix in an apology.
>>
>>31475483
"Sorry, I was a jerk."
>>
>>31475483
>How... How the hell do I even word this?
start with Sorry. So long as you mean it.

You do mean it, right?
>>
>>31475483
lel

You just got told how it be by Rena, a person whose density rivals neutron stars.

How does it feel, beacon-top?
>>
>>31475483

Say something about how you are sorry that you were so dense and didn't realize how she would feel when you went to go get that game.

But above all, it needs to be sincere. If you're not really sorry, she'll pick up on it and you'll be up shit creek without a paddle. Ponder on it if you must.
>>
>>31475567
Bullshit, there's absolute no way that neutron stars are that dense.
>>
>>31475483
>I... But it really wasn't that big of a deal. It was just a game. I even invited her to come by and play it with me.
Notice how you remember how you disappointed her, but not the game you disappointed her in favor of getting.

This is a pretty good indicator that you actually DO understand which thing was more important in the long-run.

Just tell her that, like >>31475525 said.
>>
Is funny seeing Rena talking about breaking a girl heart after what she did to Bridgette.
>>
>>31475483
"I never meant to hurt you."
>>
>>31475666
There is a certain amount of irony that this is seemingly part of the problem here.

BUT, Rena did handle that with a damn sight more tact than Sonitama did.
>>
>>31475666
eh, that's different.
She apologized right away, recognized that shit aint good, and so on.
>>
>>31475666
She handled it pretty well though.
>>
>>31475712
>>31475711
She apologized right away because we and Cynthia said that she had broken Bridgette's heart, Sonitama had no one to tell him that.
>>
>>31475735

We are good life coaches. Sonitama should listen to us.
>>
>>31475483
Be prepared for some hate-sex.
>>
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Alright. I think I can do this.
-sigh-
Stupid girl.

"Can you make your way back to the city?"

R: "Yeah."

"Go. If there are explosions you'll know it didn't go well."

Two S-Class 1's meeting each other.
Hasn't happened in a while.
Let's just hope she's in a good mood.

>The two of them head down the mountain with Rena splitting off to go back to the city. Threepunch Man goes to Skull Mountain, the home to the Lord of Death.
>She is sitting upon her skullthrone as usual.

LoD: "Threepunch-Man..."

"Meagan."

LoD: "It's Lord of Death."

>She walks down her throne and stares at him.

LoD: "Well?"

"I... I'm sorry I got a game that I can't even remember now instead of going out on that date with you."

LoD: "It was Street Fighter: Kid's Editon."

"Was it?"

LoD: "Yes."

"You still remember the name?"

LoD: "I never forgot it."

"... Well, I feel even worse now. That game sucked."

LoD: "This is all because of that alternate universe, isn't it?"

"Partially. But that redhead made me realize I was just being stupid this whole time. I was so sure I was right."

LoD: "Hmph. Well, I'm not saying yes to working with you but... I will think about it."

"Alright."

>She stands there, as if waiting for something else.

... Did I do well? Should I just go? I can't read the girl with that stupid mask on.
>>
>>31475525
You could put that shit on a letter
>>
>>31475820
...the man has a point.

How long have you been up here. You might need a shower first.
>>
>>31475821
Tell her she's pretty! Girls love that shit!
>>
>>31475821
Is her daughter your kid? You should ask if it's your kid.
>>
>>31475821
Ask her if she'd like to give it a second try
>>
>>31475821
Ask her to remove the mask so you can talk face to face.
>>
>>31475888
>>31475882
These please.
>>
>>31475821
Grab some coffee.
>>
>>31475821
So, uh, how's the whole Lord of Death thing working out for you?
>>
>>31475821
>I can't read the girl with that stupid mask on.
You know, for some who can detect god level threats, you're missing out on a lot of clues. Like, y'know. Body language, tone of voice, etc.

Maybe you could ask her about the redhead? She seems kinda weird.
>>
>>31475821

Ask if she's open for coffee this Thursday.
>>
>>31475821
Tell her you want to apologize to her face and then ask if she'll forgive you and if she wants to try it again.
>>
>>31475877
nooooo, she can't be!

If she is she (probably) can't be an eggbaby (without torturous plot twists).
>>
>>31475821
Since we're going to be working together, wanna go into town and have a coffee?
I've got a lot of backpay and haven't been in ages, I imagine it's the same for you.
>>
>>31475911
haha, this.

Painful small talk is best talk
>>
>>31475926
>for some who can detect god level threats,
I honestly don't think that is something hard to do at all, they're creature that can destroy the World/Humanity, shouldn't be too hard to recognize one.
>>
>>31475821
Ask her out for coffee and a brawl.
>>
>>31475832
He's probably fine. Sitting under waterfalls all the time is like, guru meditation 101.

>>31475821
Maybe offer to go pick up a copy of that shitty game together so you can both ritually destroy it for catharsis.

Some people love that kind of quirky shit.

>>31475926
>Maybe you could ask her about the redhead? She seems kinda weird.
This is also probably worth doing. She just sort of walked up and started blabbing about Mario Kart. Probably worth asking if she did this with LoD also. (Hint: she did.)
>>
SMALL TALK AND ASK HER OUT TO COFFEE YOU FOOL!
>>
>>31475821
"I hadn't planned any further than this."
>>
>>31475821
ask her if she wants to go for that date now.
>>
>>31475877
Why would you think she has kids?
>>
>>31475821
I'd say ask her what the deal with the redhead is.

Just asking her out for coffee right now seems a bit too soon.
>>
>>31475821
"I hadn't planned any further than this, thinking isn't really my thing, as you might have guessed"
Self deprecating humor to break the ice, GoGoGo!
>>
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"Man, what was the deal with that redhead, huh? She just came up to me and asked to play Mario Kart."

LoD: "Did she? She did the same with me. I guess it worked?"

"I didn't play but... It certainly got my attention. It's been a while since I played video games."

LoD: "Same. She is quite skilled."

"You played against her?"

LoD: "And lost."

"Wow..."

...
..
...

"So... How's it going being Lord of Death?"

LoD: "It's uh... Quiet. I don't really do much."

"Same. It seems I only do Hero stuff when it's with you."

LoD: "Yeah."

"Hey, can you take off your mask? It's kinda hard talking to you with it on."

LoD: "No."

"Come on. I can't even tell if you're glaring at me furiously or what."

LoD: "I won't do it."

"Please."

LoD: "..."

>She removes her mask.

LoD: "There. Now go. Before I change my mind."

>She puts her mask back on.

"Yeah, sure..."

>As he leaves her lair an idea comes to him. He turns to her and does his best to appear casual.

"It's been a while since I've checked out the coffee shops in town. Maybe we can get a cup before the big fight?"

LoD: "... We could talk about our strategy."

"Yeah."

LoD: "Very well. I'm free tomorrow."

"Same."

LoD: "I will be there. Without my costume."

"Okay."

LoD: "Alright."

>They stand there for a while longer before the silence becomes painful. He leaves.

I think that went better than expected.
>>
>>31476144
YES
>>
>>31476144
>I think that went better than expected.
much better than expected.

Though, that's not a complaint.
>>
>>31476144
She digs you bro
hit that
>>
>>31476144
Man, wearing a mask all day did not do her any favors.
>>
>>31476144
You stood up that qt? Shame on you sir.
>>
>>31476144
Rena works in mysterious ways.
>>
>>31476144
Obviously, she wants your Deadly punch.
>>
Rolled 5, 10, 6, 20, 19, 10, 5 = 75

>>31476144
Now you better show up tomorrow. Don't screw it up. Go buy a nice shirt and jacket, and get some sunglasses so other people don't recognize you.

GO
>>
Larro stop making Rena the matchmaker and give her a lover already, damnit.
Or just make her accept that she is an asexual so i can have peace.
>>
>>31476144
Threepunch man? More like You're-gonna-hit-that man!

I'm sorry.
>>
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>Meanwhile, back within the city.

Oh boy..
I hope he did good.
I don't want everything to explode.
Please let everything not explode. I don't do well with explosions.
>>
>>31476206
Also shave.
>>
>>31476211
She's already outright stated she doesn't want to be in a relationship. The only one who isn't ok with it is /tg/ and her suitors
>>
>>31476198
now, imagine how terrifying she could be if she used those powers for evil.
>>
>>31476217
You should hang out in the coffee shop tomorrow.
>>
>>31476217
I think the only explosions will involve their genitals.
>>
>>31476217
Seeing how many explosions you've been through, you still don't take them well.
>>
>>31476217
DON'T WORRY, HE DID GOOD
Go into the city and find caffornicator
we always need more caffornicator
>>
>>31476217
Worry about your own romance. Didn't you have a date with Spine Ravager today? He dressed up so cutely last time, you can't just wear your usual stuff. It would be rude.
>>
>>31476217
Check out that warning thing.
>>
>>31476217
It's fine. You can go do... whatever it is that you do when you are not saving the world now. You have some time.
>>
>>31476217
You should also call Sparkle and tell her you were hopefully maybe successful and probably didn't fuck everything up.
>>
>>31476217
Nothing you can do about it now, so it should be time for your... TRAINING MONTAGE. With suitably upbeat bakcground music.
>>
>>31476217
Quick, call Sparkle, see if there's any progress on gathering the heroes and villains to unite against evil you.
Might as well get a report on anything new happening, or if she came up with a plan. And you need to fill her in on the fact that you managed to get those two to hopefully work together.
>>
>>31476285
You know who we need?

Velocity Raptor and Mantis Shrimp Man.

Because mantis shrimp man always gives good advice and velocity raptor because dinosaur.
>>
>>31476285
Actually, Sparkle should call Rena because she's alarmed by the fact that her "rena fucked up" sense isn't going off.
>>
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He did good? Good. I hoped it would work out between them. I hate to see love like that ruined over something silly.

>Rena calls up Sparkle and tells her that she did well and Threepunch Man and Lord of Death should be on the team. Sparkle says she knew that if anyone could do it it would be Rena. She has her own contacts trying to recruit people. She already has most of the S-Class Heroes. She then excuses herself, her baby bit Monster Marauder on accident again. There's blood everywhere.

>>31476259
But... He scares me...
Did you see him? With those giant shell bits and that freaky tongue and eye? I can't tell if he likes me for my looks or wants to eat my spine or something.
I know I sound kinda hypocritical considering I just lectured the guy on standing people up but can't I just... Not go?
>>
>>31476358
>Mantis Shrimp
Pistol Shrimp gonna kick his ass
>>
>>31476379
She turned that off already.
>>
>>31476379
She learned to turn it off, remember? Or she couldn't get a moment of rest.
Not that she's getting any now that she has a baby.
>>
>>31476396

Weren't you the one saying that he wasn't such a bad guy a while ago?

YES YOU HAVE TO GO.
>>
>>31476396
>blood everywhere
AAAH
>>
>>31476396
I'm sorry Rena, but if you want to break up with him you'll need to do it to his face. Probably with caffornicator hiding around the corner to save you if anything goes wrong
>>
>>31476396
No, go on that date. He's a sweetie.
>>
>>31476396
YOU HAVE TO GO
>>
>>31476396
YOU HAVE TO GO
Put on that cute tomboy outfit.
>>
>>31476396
Rena, since you know the enemy best, her being yourself, start thinking up ways you could defeat yourself. A powerded-up, deathly deadly version of yourself.
>>
>>31476396
>but can't I just... Not go?
You want the world to burn and die a horrible death, don't you?
>>
>>31476396
GO ON DATE WITH SPINE RAVAGER

HAVE A WONDERFUL TIME

FEEL ROMANCE

IF YOU DON'T, YOUR SPINE WILL BE RAVAGED
>>
>>31476431
sweeties don't ravage spines
>>
>>31476396
Rena, you have to go and let him down gently.
You'll probably hurt him, but it'd hurt less than being stood up.

And he won't go on a spine ravaging spree that way.
>>
>>31476396
If the timing was a little better with you guys and the S-1s, it could've been the worlds awkwardest double-date.

This could easily have gone horribly, naturally, so you should probably be thankful.

...but seriously, even if you don't intend to do anything after this, you should at least have the courtesy to break his heart in person.

...set him up with evil-you. What could go wrong?
>>
>>31476400
>>31476408
I thought she just tuned it out?
>>
>>31476457

Rena's spine won't be the only thing that'll get ravaged.
>>
>>31476396
You should do what you want to. If you can't see yourself wanting to go out with him, you shouldn't do it. Even if it's for different reasons, the same logic applies here as it does for Bridgette, right? Just tell him straight up.
>>
>>31476459
MMA's a sweetie, ya? Rena can be a good influence on Spine Ravager like Sparkle is for Ben.
>>
>>31476396
You should call Shadow Man and ask him to tell you what the deal with Spine Ravager is.

Like... what is he, where did he come from, things like that.
>>
>>31476459
What's up with that anyway? Does he eat them?

>>31476482
He wanted to ravage her spine... She ended ravaging his heart.
>>
>>31476457
you forgot your caps lock on anon.
>>
>>31476482
I see no problems with this
>>
>>31476396
You're going, Rena. You'll go and have a great time.
>>
>>31476504
Probably originates from outside the city.
>>
Wait.

Rena can understand what we say, right.

Doesn't that mean we can go into, say, Evil-Rena's mind and discover her plans, and then shunt back to Rena and reveal Evil-Rena's secrets?
>>
>>31476396
Well Rena if you're going to tell him no, you should at least be woman enough to tell it to him in person.
>>
>>31476570
But what if Evil Rena has Evil Voices? And then we just switch places with them?

I don't want Rena corrupted by shitposters, do you?
>>
>>31476570
GENIUS! Of course!
>>
>>31476396
No

Spine Ravager is a perfect gentleman and you should feel ashamed of yourself for thinking about standing him up.

Besides the fact that not going will likely end in your spine being ravaged.
>>
>>31476618
>Betray all your friends and steal their powers!
>murder everyone!
>yuri ALL the time!
>>
>>31476570
She'll conveniently not understand or not believe those things.

What are the Voices anyway?
>>
>>31476640
...i think we may be the evil voices.
>>
>>31476652
The spectators of the show, of course.
>>
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Yeah I... I guess I'll go. I owe him that much. It's not like a date-date or anything. But I do need to tell him that I'm just uh... Not into monsters.
======================================

>We now join Bridgette as she leaves home. She's run dangerously low on alcohol and cookies. As she walks to the store she sees a most unusual sight.
>Rena is sitting outside of a restaurant with the deadly and evil Spine Ravager. They appear to be having dinner.

The fuck..?

>She moves in a bit closer and can hear Rena talking about the time that she had to fight against a Chinese zombie and a mobster.

Are they... Are they dating?

>She hears the Spine Ravager laughing. It's terrifying. Rena looks like she's on the verge of tears the whole time.

Or is she being held against her will? Should I save her?
>>
>>31476640
Evil Rena Quest sounds so much fun...
>>
>>31476652
>What are the Voices anyway?

Us.

It is established that people we inhabit are not only able to understand what we say, but also view images we post and make personal quips about suggestions.
>>
>>31476682
rena was asked on a date by spine ravager.
She is TERRIFIED of not going.
He isn't technically threatening her. It's just he's very scary.

She is going to try to let him off easy, but that is difficult being that he is a giant monster.
>>
>>31476682
Nope, they're dating. They are on a date.

How does it feel, knowing you lost a relationship contest to a giant hideous monster that ravages spines?
>>
>>31476682
>Or is she being held against her will? Should I save her?
does the Spine Ravager technically count as a monster?

Because this could be hilarious
>>
>>31476682
Go find out.
>>
>>31476682
Go save your gir.... uh, friend.
>>
>>31476682
Kidnap her. You'd be helping a friend and getting paid for it.
>>
>>31476682
>Or is she being held against her will? Should I save her?

I think this is a good time to let Rena be the one getting the short end of the dating stick.
>>
>>31476682
You don't have enough information to act on! Spy on them for Rena's safety!
>>
he asked her out and she was too scared to say no. she is planing to break it off after this but you can save her if he gets upset and goes for the spine.
>>
>>31476682
>Or is she being held against her will? Should I save her?
Nah, she's just doing her work as a hero, protecting the world from the spine ravager.

Buy cake and vodka.
>>
>>31476682
Save her? You're a villain, when you do it, it's called a kidnapping.
>>
>>31476682
Why are you even asking that?

You saw how she beat Spine Ravager last time.

He asked her out, and now she's stuck on a date with him out of a combination of politeness and not wanting to get her spine ravaged.
>>
>>31476715
Turn into a girl Spine Ravager
>>
>>31476682
Well, she's doing it so he doesn't ravage more spines.

Keep an eye on them, she might need saving when she tells him she's not into monsters.
>>
>>31476682
no. you can't save rena.

you can only kidnap her.
kidnap her to sweet, sweet safety.
>>
>>31476682
It's a date. Sit back and laugh
>>
>>31476682
I'll second the anon who suggested kidnapping her. Do not go gently into the night.
>>
>>31476682
Let her be. She should be fine. If there is anything Rena is good at it is social relations. In a strange way, but still she is really good. Spine Ravager probably fell for her.
>>
>>31476682
Turn into a spider and go spy on her. But don't SPY-spy on her, just, um, spy. Because you're doing this for her own good. Yeah, that's all there's to it.
>>
>>31476682
Stay back and film for posterity.
>>
>>31476682
Just go say hi, can't hurt right? I mean, worst case you interrupt something, but after Rena's history of obliviousness regarding you she can't possibly hold that against you.
>>
>>31476783
this is a pretty good idea.
>>
>>31476682
She's her Bowser, go be her Mario
>>
>>31476682
>he's holding that tiny little glass
HE IS TRYING SO HARD TO PLEASE RENA
>>
>>31476820
>it's full of spinal fluids
>>
>>31476682
You DO recall how she beat Spine Ravager, right?

They're totally on a date.

I'm sorry you had to find out like this.
>>
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>>31476747
Holy shit she actually is going on a date with him? Oh my god.
I feel bad for her, actually. She must have been bullied into it or something.

>>31476713
Really? That still kinda stings.

>>31476715
I think he does count.

>>31476710
Yeah, so she's being bullied.

>>31476780
Of course. All for my friend and all that.

>Bridgette turns into a spider and begins crawling her way over to the table.

She got all dressed up and everything. I think she looks cute when she dresses up more girly. I-
Ugh. No. Bad thoughts. Alright, let's see what's going on.

>She hears Rena talking constantly. Like a man being tortured to give away information, she just says one thing after another. The Spine Ravager mostly nods or laughs. It seems he really is quite interested.
>Bridgette's connection with monsters let's her know that the beast is doing his best to not ravage Rena's spine. But he would be more than willing to ravage other things if she asked.

I guess she's doing well. I'm just worried how the big guy will take it when she smashes his heart into a billion pieces.
It might be funny but I'd rather not have her die.

>>31476758
... I could but then I'd have Spine Ravager chasing me. I like my spine where it is, thank you very much.

R: "So... I need to tell you something..."

Oh boy. Here it is.
Should I intervene?
>>
>>31476682
She encountered him while she was out heroing, and she tried to charm him to save her life. Somehow it worked. I'm not really sure how she felt about it; she seemed apprehensive.

What the heck is Spine Ravager, anyway?
>>
>>31476881
Jump back
HAHA
HERO RENA
IT IS I, MONSTER MAESTRO
YOU SHALL MEET WITH MY WRATH!
WELCOME TO DIE
>>
>>31476881
No, wait and see how she handles it. Standby for interference afterwards.
>>
>>31476881
>Should I intervene?
NO. Let her handle it. Intervene only if spines are about to ger ravaged.
>>
>>31476881
Summon a female spine ravager.
>>
>>31476881
No
>>
>>31476881
... What color pantsu is she wearing.
I need to know for science reasons
>>
>>31476881
uh, just be ready to try and use your monster powers to subdue him if he gets rowdy.
>>
>>31476881
>Should I intervene?
Yes.

How, I don't know.

Could you summon a nice girl spine ravager for him?
>>
>>31476198
She can never love because she is too busy wingmanning everyone else.
>>
>>31476881
You're on stand by mode. If Ravager is going to... well Ravage Rena Spine you need to be ready to stop that.
>>
>>31476881
Let her try. If shit goes ass-upwards you can try to summon Spine Ravager safely.
>>
>>31476937
This.
>>
>>31476881
she's a big girl, she can break up with bowser on her own
>>
>>31476881
Not yet. This might actually go well. Rena's surprisingly good at connecting with people even if you'd expect it to be impossible.

Just stick around and see how it goes. If they part ways happily, then that's good. If he loses control or gets mad, you'll be there to save her.
>>
>>31476881
Standby for consoling and/or freak-outs.
>>
>>31476881
>But he would be more than willing to ravage other things if she asked.

L-lewd

Don't intervene. Maybe things will work themselves out.
>>
>>31476881
Wait for it. She has to do this on her own.

Jump in when the Spine Ravager freaks out, claim how he can't kill your Arch or you'll sue him to the Villain Association which will result in him getting kicked out.
Be the smarter and more dickish villain.

Then kidnap Rena and cackle maniacally into the night.
>>
>>31476881
only intervene if it goes south, you should back off, and summon him if he starts raging
>>
>>31476237
No she didnt. She said she loves the idea of love, she cant into it.
>>
>>31476881
Let's be honest here Rena could be getting ready to tell Ravager almost any inane thing
>>
>>31476881
If you intervene now, he'll only come back to try again.
>>
I don't think Rena's giving Ravager a fair chance. I mean, she's so scared I doubt they've even played video games together.
>>
You all realize Rena's about to tell him she's not into monster's right?
Brigitte's gonna cry.
>>
>>31477038
It's like /u/boats 2: monsterfags boogaloo in here.
>>
>>31476881
He's about to get his heart ravaged. I think we all know who the REAL monster is here.
>>
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>>31476983
>>
>>31477062
The guy who ravages spines.
>>
>>31476881
By the way Bridgette, you look adorable as a spider.
>>
>>31476881
Only if she actually gets endangered. Half odds he runs away crying like a little girl.
>>
>>31477062
That's hardly fair anon, would a relationship built on lies be any better?
>>
Spine Ravager, MM+ and Shadow Man together in a bar
SM: I knew everything about her, apart from how she'd let me down...
MM+: I could summon everything, but her affection...
SR: I wanted to ravage her spine, but she ended up ravaging my heart...
SAD AT RENA CLUB
SOON
>>
>>31477095
I dont think she's ever managed to transform without being adorable. Actually, I dont recall a time she was ever not kawaii as fuck.
>>
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>>31476951
I wouldn't be able to see from here. She's sitting down. I usually see her in boxer shorts, though.

>>31477095
I am not adorable... I am a monster!

>>31477142
Hahaha.
Haha.
ha....

>>31477107
>>31476925

Yeah, if he freaks out I'll save her. Let's see how this goes.

"I think you're a great person but... I don't think it'll work out right now. I'm not really looking to start any relationships. But I think we can uh... Be friends. If you want."

>There is silence for the longest time. Then, to both Rena and Bridgette's surprise, the monster speaks. His words sound gravelly and he struggles to speak but he still pushes through.

SR: "I... Understand... You are.... Nice girl."

Holy shit.

"Thank you. I'm really sorry about this."

>The Spine Ravager shakes his head. The tension is gone now and Rena chats about other mundane things.

How... How the hell does she manage to do that?
>>
>>31477056
Rena has the worst of luck when it comes to romance. If she isn't being hit on by soul sucking monstrosities that want nothing more than to rip her open and grind her to nothing, then she is being hit on by Spine Ravager.
>>
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>>31477095
She's always adorable.
>>
>>31477062
>I think we all know who the REAL monster is here.
Lesbians. It was always lesbians.
>>
>>31477123
>>31477083
She shamelessly seduced him, all in a selfish attempt to keep her spine safe from ravaging. Poor, poor Spine Ravager.
>>
>>31477153
>How... How the hell does she manage to do that?
It's her superpower.
>>
>>31477153

She is Rena.
>>
>>31477145
...wait, could she transform into a super cute female spine ravager?

>>31477153
Summon a female spine ravager. For science.
>>
>>31477153
NOW. SUMMON ANOTHER ADORABLE SPINE RAVAGER.

This fulfils both your Villain Quota and gets Rena out of an awkward date.

...Though, that's a good question. Kidnap her and take her to the villain assosciation for experimentation to find out how she does that.
>>
>>31477153
Well, you should be better able to tell than us, having been hit by the dreaded rejection yourself.

Anyway, seems disaster is averted. Go be adorable somewhere else!
>>
>>31477153
I... I'm not sure either, but I suddenly wish I had her skill at dealing with breakups.
>>
>>31477153
Poor Spine Ravager.

I really hoped this one would work out.
>>
>>31477153
She Is a FRIENDZONING God!
>>
>>31477153
Nobody can stay mad at Rena.
>>
>>31477153
>SR: "I... Understand... You are.... Nice girl."
Man, Spine Ravager took that more maturely than SOME PEOPLE we know.
>>
>>31477153
Rena works in mysterious ways
>>
>>31477153
Her real power is Aura of Nice.
>>
>>31477205
At this point, we should call it the RenaZone.
>>
>>31477153
That's her superpower.

Keep an eye out on them, in case he decides to ravage her in some back alley.
But you should probably get your shopping done, maybe call Rider out for some drinks after all this shit.
>>
>>31477153
We're honestly not sure ourselves. We think she has some sort of latent psychic power. Either that, or there are a lot of crazy people just waiting for someone to talk to them.

Either way, it looks like things are turning out well. Rena's safe, and SR is actually showing some human emotions.
>>
>>31477153
Another ship sunk

WHEN WILL THE MADNESS END, LARRO?

HOW MANY INNOCENT SAILORS IS ENOUGH TO SATIATE YOUR BLOODLUST?
>>
>>31477153
She is truly amazing.
Now, go hang out with someone else!
>>
>>31477153
offer to summon the guy a female spine ravager or something. they can be villainous together on a picnic
>>
>>31477205
>>31477205
HERO RENA, your ability, complete mastery of THE FRIEND ZONE is what we need to save the world! Use your powers to put EVIL RENA's lovers into THE FRIEND ZONE, thus robbing EVIL RENA of her dastardly yuri related strength! Only you, HERO RENA, GOD OF THE FRIEND ZONE can save the city!!!!
>>
>>31477153
She's sincere
>>
>>31477153
Have you considered dating Evil Rena, Bridgette? It could solve many problems.
>>
>>31477236
I'm sure SR will find a nice monster to settle down with soon, anon. Or maybe a human who sees it for what it is, not how it looks.

Bridgette forever alone though.
>>
>>31477256
Rena x EvilRena OTP.
>>
>>31477251
>He wants Spine Ravager to breed.
>>
>>31477267
Given that Other Bridgette is dead, that may not be wise. Kinda need to figure out why, first.
>>
>>31477273
But is it incest, or masturbation?
>>
>>31477219
This. Bridgette and Cynthia are more of monsters than Spine Ravager
>>
>>31477219
Hey, Bridgette was pretty mature about it, too. She was sad, yes, but that's understandable. It was Cynthia who threatened to kill her over it.
>>
>>31477284
I don't, especially. BUT it fulfils Bridgette's Villain quota, her duties as a Daughter of the Monster AND gets Rena out of a date.
>>
>>31477226
This is a place populated by men, women
and even monsters.
It appears adjacent to paradise,
but is in fact, insurmountably far away.

The place you see before you is one made a cute girl
Her name is Rena.
You were going out with her.

And now, you're entering

The RenaZone

"Can't we just be friends?"
>>
>>31477292
Almost certainly things got derailed at some point during the whole Ignis/AH/Rider-revenge series of events, one of them (well, or AH's demon) probably killed her.
>>
>>31477292
Killed by Anti-Hero, we've already found that out
>>
>>31477318
we did? When?
>>
>>31477153
I wonder how EvilRena deals with breakups.
>>
>>31477267
The Rena that Bridgette fell in love with wasn't a power-stealing serial killer rapist.
>>
>>31477300
It's hot, that's all that matters.
>>
>>31477332
Not yet anyway.
>>
>>31477330
Back when we asked Rena's fangirl about her fanfic.
Turns out her fanfic is exactly what happened in the other universe
>>
>>31477332
What did Evil!Rena rape?
>>
>>31477371
Sparkles, often.
>>
>>31477371
Sparkle.
>>
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>>31477219
..............

>>31477251
>>31477197
Oh wow. I've never actually tried to summon anything that big. Let's see what happens.

>Bridgette focuses her powers and pulls something through from the dimension of monsters. A female spine ravager appears next to Rena and Spine Ravager. She looks at the large male and makes a terrible purring sound. Bridgette can sense that there is a new object of his affection.
>The two of them walk off into the city, destroying a few buildings along the way.
>Bridgette made $50,000.
>>
>>31477371
I dunno, but she's keeping Sparkle around as a slave

The implications are unpleasant.
>>
>>31477371
OtherSparks is her sex slave according to JR.
>>
>>31477371
Alternate Sparkle, according to Revolver's prophecy fanfic iirc
>>
>>31477363
I'm pretty sure there were subtle differences and things we couldn't actually verify.

I mean, the universe were Evil Rena comes from, Caffo is a villain.
>>
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>>31477371
Sparkle is her sex slave
>>
>>31477332
Among villians, does that matter?
>>
>>31477385
Great work, Bridgette! Now that's some villainous relationship managing!
>>
>>31477385
>Bridgette made $50,000.
score!
>>
>>31477385
>those horns
>that barrel chest
>that beard
Now that's a sexy monster!
>>
>>31477385
Now kidnap Rena.
>>
>>31477385
You clearly have excellent taste in girl-monsters too, Bridgette.
>>
>>31477385

No abscond with the Rena.
>>
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>>31477378
>>31477380
Man, being alternate world Sparkle is suffering. First, all that shit happens in her backstory. Then her remaining eye is gouged out. Then she's kept around as a rapeslave by an insane demigod.

And she still maintains enough cohesiveness to help out when given the chance.

Sparkle best character
>>
>>31477385
Great job. All the spines they and their offspring ravage will be on your hands.

Now kidnap Rena, time for her to tell you what happened outside the city.
You do know she went out to meet Lord of Death and the Threepunch Man, right?
>>
>>31477465
Very excellent taste, I must say. My approval, Monster Maestro!
>>
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>>31477435
She already ran off. Another time.
I need to get booze.

>Bridgette resumes her trip to the store. She sees her sister there, a shopping cart filled with plenty of meats and oddly enough coffee cakes.

"Hey, sis!"

>Cynthia jumps up then groans, holding her head in pain.

C: "Sister, dear... Can you... Can you just not yell? Please?"

"Uh, yeah. Are you okay?"

C: "I'm fine I just... Haven't been feeling well."

She looks like shit. I've never seen her not do the whole 'evil big sis' thing.
>>
>>31477385
Have you ever tried summoning a monster-girl to date? I mean, you seem a lot better at summoning the right thing than actually finding someone receptive to put the moves on. No offense.
>>
>>31477512
She's probably got a hangover. Stuff a bacon sandwich in her mouth, it should help a bit.
>>
>>31477512
Looks like she's had too much coffee.
>>
>Bridgette made money

Wait. She's a hero now?
>>
>>31477474
To be fair, that could be because alt-sparkle is working behind the scenes to bump off evil Rena and be an even bigger bitch.

But I'll assume not until proven otherwise.
>>
>>31477512
tell her caffornicator is nice and she should be more gentle

it's her own fault she has a caffine addiction now
>>
>>31477512
Tell her she looks like she could use some coffee.
>>
>>31477512
she hasnt slept in days
Give her hug, wish her well, get on with shopping.
>>
>>31477512
She's got a hangover? Just how much does she need to drink to get hung over like that?
>>
>>31477512
Ask her what's wrong for really real. She can't hide from you!
>>
>>31477512
She drank hero nympho's blood

enough said
>>
>>31477512

Ask her what's with the coffee cakes. She didn't seem like the type to have a sweet tooth before, did she?
>>
>>31477512
Has Cynthia been much of a coffee drinker in the past?
>>31477534
She brought a new Spine Ravager into this world, truly a grand act of villainy.
>>
>>31477512
She either got pounded to ahgeo, is hungover, or is on withdrawal
You should be the perfect little sister and help.
>>
>>31477534
By villainy.

She just summoned a second Spine Ravager and set them loose on the city.
>>
>>31477512
Get drunk with her.

Or shout.
>>
>>31477512
Probably crashing after drinking all that caffeinated blood of Caffornicator I wager
>>
>>31477512
Ask her if she's okay, and if she needs anything.
Now it's your turn to be the overbearing sister. Show her what it was like.

>>31477534
Villains get paid by the Villain association for performing evil deeds.
>>
>>31477534
She initiated the destruction so Villains paid her.
>>
>>31477534
No, she's a villain. She got money for making the Spine Ravagers destroy stuff. Did you read the post?
>>
>>31477531
Do it!

>>31477512
"New girlfriend?"
>>
>>31477512
Oh my god she's addicted to coffee because of Caffornicator.

Tell her she should try decaf.
>>
>>31477512
Caffeine overdose is a hell of a thing!
>>
>>31477590
destroy eachother's genitals
>>
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>>31477512
Too much coffee

Caffeine addiction is a thing. She's probably in withdrawal.
>>
>>31477598
Actually, this is perfect.

Bridgette wants to drink.
And Cynthia needs to drink.

Monster girls time to hit the town and party!
>>
>>31477531
>summon girlfriend

Maybe there is a monster version of Rena in some universe. Sexy full vampire Rena
>>
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>>31477626
>>
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Caffeine is a very addicting drug.
>>
>>31477662
No. Dont you dare. It'll summon evilrena
>>
>>31477676
Its Caffornicator's devious scheme to make Cynthia addicted to her.
>>
>>31477512
Y'know, the funny thing here is that I just got back from making coffee myself.
>>
>>31477680
I don't think so.

Not while the gate is closed.

Bridgette had trouble pulling her own bones and that was while it was open.
>>
>>31477512
"Want to grab coffee or something? Talk about it?"
>>
>>31477695
Nah, it's just a fortunate quirk of Cynthia's bitey nature and Caffornicators freaky biology.
>>
>>31477702
Give yourself a coffee enema.
>>
>>31477680
Or the Rena that accepted MM+'s offer
>>
>>31477706
She should find a necromancer villain to animate those bones.

She can just date herself. Alternatively, give SkellyBridgette to evilrena to stop her from being such a massive cunt.
>>
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"Seriously, what's wrong?"

C: "It's... It's this Hero. She's an S-Class. Rena dragged me over to meet her and she was getting too close so I bit her. Now she keeps appearing but nothing I do keeps her away for long. And she heals rather quickly..."

"Was it Caffornicator?"

C: "Yes... Now please, I just want to go home and sleep this off..."

"Have you been drinking her blood?"

C: "Every time but she doesn't stay down. I must have drunk gallons by now. She should be dead. But she keeps getting back up."

"You... You know her blood is coffee, right? And that caffeine is a drug? A very addictive drug?"

C: "..."

>She just groans and leans against her trolley.

C: "That girl is literally giving me a headache, dear sister..."

"Maybe she likes you?"

C: "Well I don't like her! Ow!" She holds her head again. "I think I'll just... Go to the coffee shop or something..."
>>
>>31477706
>Bridgette had trouble pulling her own bones and that was while it was open.
>pulling her own bones
I had to read that twice before realizing it wasn't an innuendo.
>>
>>31477740
Look behind you.
>>
>>31477740
Oh, that must be her back there.
Go over and ask her nicely to leave Cynthia alone for a bit so she can get weaned off the Caffeine. Also ask her what her intentions are regarding your sister.
>>
>>31477740
"Oh my god... You're in love!
You have my full support!"
>>
>>31477740
No, you're going home with us. We'll get you warm, fed, and cozy, and you'll sleep this off.
>>
>>31477740
Instead of biting her, you should lick her. That way you can get her off your back
>>
>>31477740
Take your sister.

She has a problem. She needs to break the addiction.

Send her towards one of those Self help places
>>
>>31477740
A taste of your own medicine.

Have fun
>>
>>31477740
"Do you want me to talk to her like an adult? I'm... experienced with unreturned affections, I guess."
>>
Huh, maybe this is good for you, Cynthia.

You have a problem that you can't deal with just by biting it.

Maybe you could try using the words that you have? It seems to be a recurring theme of this episode.
>>
>>31477740
The next time she comes around, Cynthia should just set herself on fire. The stalker's speed won't matter if she's on fire.

For now, we need to get her somewhere safe so she can stop drinking so much coffee. Use webbing if necessary.
>>
>>31477740
tell her to go get some sleep, then go talk to caffornicator
>>
>>31477740
BEHIND YOU!
>>
>>31477740
Karma~
>>
>>31477740
There's no escape
>>
>>31477740
Bridgette this is your chance to meddle with your sister's business hilariously. Give Caffornicator bad advice and junk.
>>
>>31477740
Well it's not THAT addictive.

Ask why she doesn't like her.
>>
>>31477740
Hey, has Cynthia tried Rena's tried-and-true bondage method to get over wanting to bite people?
>>
>>31477832
Maybe because she reminds her too much of herself?
>>
>>31477740
have you tried doing things other than either assaulting her or accepting her romance?

try taking her to the park
>>
>>31477832
It's SUPER addictive because it's a SUPER power.
>>
>>31477849
Cynthia actually understands what bondage is, though, we'll never see her wearing that.
>>
>>31477862
No.
It's because Caff is HAPPY in spite of being the butt-monkey. Cynthia's MISERABLE in spite of everything being pretty good.

Caff is who she WANTS to be.
>>
>>31477740
Huh, I wonder if the baby is biting Cynthia because she tastes like coffee from all the coffee she's drinking. Is the baby on drugs?
>>
>>31477740
So every time you drank all her blood, that was like 6 litres of coffee right there. Assuming it's pretty strong coffee, that's like... 5000 mg of caffeine. That exceeds the lethal dose for a human.

If you weren't a monster, you'd have overdosed and died from coffee.
>>
>>31477740
Can't she just... filter out the blood toxins or whatever?
>>
>>31477910
... You seriously think caff is happy? Rather, was happy before she deluded herself into thinking MM++ was returning her affections with the biting
>>
>>31477474
>Sparkle best character
That aint Queenie.
>>
>>31477948
That isn't Evil Rena.
>>
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"You know sis she kinda reminds me of you."

C: "What do you mean..?"

"You know with the whole aggressive flirting thing. You do that all the time. With everyone. Even me."

C: "Yes, but... That's not the same... That's part of my whole Villain thing."

"I'm guessing you just don't like it when the tables are turned on you."

C: "That's not..."

"You know I'm right."

C: "... I don't need this. I'm going home."

"Hey, wait."

>She reaches out and grabs her sister's arm.

"You can rest up at my place. It's warm, comfortable, and I'll cook you whatever you want."

C: "... That sounds lovely. I'll see you there, dear sister~"

>Cynthia leaves. Without paying for anything.
>Bridgette marches up to Caffornicator.

"You."

CF: "Hehe, hey. You're Snakey's little sister, right? That's cool. You're cute too."

"Yeah, thanks. Listen, can you just not bother her? She's in a bad mood."

CF: "I'm trying to fix that, hehe."

"You're not doing it the right way."

CF: "Well, you're her sis. Got any tips to help a lady out?"
>>
>>31477910
Caffornicator hasn't slept in something like 9 years and is soul-crushingly lonely and isolated constantly.
>>
>>31477910
Caffo hasn't slept in 9 years. And she's overdosed on caffeine all the time.
She probably has ADD and who knows what else. and probably doesn't know how to interact with people anymore besides hitting on everyone she meets.
>>
>>31477474
>>31477948
>>31477965
>Not Jade Revolver.

Bah, you people have no taste.
>>
>>31477975
How about not going so aggressively? Y'know, taking it a bit slow?
>>
>>31477983
>>31477965
>>31477948
Guys. All the girls are best girls. Even some of the dudes are best girls.
>>
>>31477975
Act cute instead of aggro?
>>
>>31477975
Teach her how to properly romance a lady, you've got some experience in this field.

>"You know with the whole aggressive flirting thing. You do that all the time. With everyone. Even me."
Why haven't we paired Bridgette up with Cynthia
>>
>>31477975
She likes being in control, and not get hit on, right? If she can manage regular friendly interaction, that would probably help.
Most of all, ask her to avoid pissing Cynthia off, otherwise the biting and addiction will continue.
>>
>>31477975
>CF: "Well, you're her sis. Got any tips to help a lady out?"
She likes heroine dressed like magical girls.
>>
>>31477975
Be less aggressive but no less persistent.
>>
>>31477975
Try to be a bit more, uh, mellow about it?
>>
>>31478028
>Teach her how to properly romance a lady
All Bridgette knows is how to get rejected.
>>
Rolled 60

>>31477975
Apologize for doing this to her, give her some time to herself, maybe make more obvious social acknowledgments and queries as time goes on.
>>
>>31477975
"Well the fact that you're constantly high on caffeine is not helping."
>>
>>31478028
I dont think bridgette will go for that :(
>>
>>31477975
Not make her bite you. Your kind of turning her into a addict and not in a good way,

I'm not sure how much caffine you have in her body, but if you keep this up, she could die of an overdose.
>>
>>31477975
Stop letting her drink your blood, it's giving her headaches and shit. We know you can just dodge that shit.

Bring her a present. Something sweet and little, doesn't have to be expensive. It shouldn't be sexual.

Lay off on trying to get into her pants. If you want to get close to her or whatever, get to know her. Maybe you share interests.

Or you could wait until she's committing a crime and then go to fight her and she'd be obligated to flirt back with you because that's part of her villainous persona.
>>
>>31477975
Take it easier on her, and try not to let her bite you. Its her go-to problem solver, and its messing her up.
>>
>>31477975
look cute and let Cynthia initiate the flirting
>>
>>31477975
Shit. What DOES Cynthia like?

Have you tried being less forward? You're coming on too strong. She isn't used to being hit on, she's used to being the one in charge of a relationship and being the one who does the hitting on.

Maybe take her out somewhere for a drink (no coffee, you both need a break from the stuff), have a talk instead of fighting, get to know each other better - stuff you like, your work, all that noise.

We know Caffo can be caring and sweet, she just needs to show others that she can be like that instead of trying to act all cool and failing miserably at it.
>>
>>31477982
Yes, and in spite of that she's STILL fairly happy.

>>31477975
"She wants to be the aggressive one. make yourself available and let her take you."
>>
>>31477975
She's had her heart toyed with before, so she's understandably not responding very well to Caffeinator's blatant flirting. Just explain that to her and tell her that if she wants to get anywhere and not cause Cynthia trouble, she should just try being nice and friendly instead of a constant innuendo-machine.
>>
>>31478049
Hmm, this is a tricky one.

I was going to suggest drugging Cynthia and sending her and Caffo off to paris with that sweet paycheck you just scored.

Then I remember this is post apocalypse and Paris isn't a thing anymore.

Maybe just talk to Caffo and see what else the two of them have in common?
>>
>>31477975

Try to sincerely get to know her instead of trying to sleep with her.

Or alternatively, get her to chase you instead of the other way around.
>>
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>>31477975
Turn into a Java Monster to seduce Caffornicator
>>
>Jade Revolver being taught the ways of the bedroom by Queenie

someone page emanon
>>
>>31477975
"No. The last thing she needs is more attention from you."
>>
>>31478082
Cheerful isn't the same thing as happy. Especially when it's false cheer.
>>
>>31477975
have you tried -not- hitting on her?
>>
Just curious, what makes you thing Cynthia's like women?

Just wondering, other then being pissed at Sparkle for messing with her, I don't see any indication of her going either way.
>>
>>31477975
Why should we tell this person anything? All we know about her is that she's been pestering your sister despite repeated warnings, and this is taking a toll on Cynthia's physical and mental health. We aren't going to play matchmaker for someone like that.
>>
>>31478148
Sure, she spent years not hitting on Cynthia?

>>31478169
Well, there was the whole Rena thing, which came off as a bit /u/, even if she was mostly doing it to set her and Bridgette up.
>>
>>31478169
>Just curious, what makes you thing Cynthia's like women?
She's a monstergirl, there are no straight monstergirls.
>>
>>31478177
Actually, I have the feeling the Bridgette knows more about Caffo than Cynthia does. She knew plenty about her blood, after all.

I don't think she's entirely disapproving of the match.
>>
>>31478202
What about the ones that rape shotas?
>>
>>31478202
Or that monstergirl mangas
>>
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>>31478202
>there are no straight monstergirls
>>
>>31478217
I didn't say they were gay.
>>
>>31478217
That's just the current target.
>>
>>31477975
"cynthia's been the aggressive one to everyone I know.
You're the first one who's been going after her.
I don't know how well you're doing."
>>
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Wait, isn't Caffo hitting on Olivia?
>>
>>31478310
no, she's taking care of olivia.
>>
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I'm not hooking them up or anything. But I can at least make things easier for sis.

"Look, maybe you can try not hitting on her all the time? Be her friend or something. Go and chat with her. Just don't piss her off and make her bite you. That's really starting to mess with her and I know for sure that you could dodge that."

CF: "Haha... I... I just thought it was kinda hot..."

"Well stop that. Seriously. She's not looking good and if she gets sick or something you'll have to deal with me."

CF: "Ha... Sorry..."

"Also she's not used to being the one not initiating things. You gotta wait til she starts it, you know? Maybe she's out doing villainy and you go to stop her? She'd love that kinda stuff."

CF: "Uh huh.."

"Just... Be cool around her. Relax and let things just flow naturally."

CF: "Haha. Yeah... I'm not too good at that. Sorry."

>She holds onto her arm and looks down, like a scolded child.

CF: "Well hey, thanks. I'll take your advice. Go see what she's up to."

"No. Leave her alone for now and let her go rest for a while."

CF: "Oh. Okay. So... I guess I'll just wait."

"Yes."

CF: "Gotcha. Alright cutie's cute lil sis, I'll see you later."

>She waves and in the blink of an eye she's gone.

That girl has some issues.
Still, she seems decent at least.
>>
>>31478310
Caffo generally hits on everybody.

But she quite specifically DIDN'T hit on olivia because it'd be a jerky thing to do someone who was as messed up in the head as she was at the time.
>>
>>31478347
ask her how long it takes for coffee jitters and headaches to go away.
>>
>>31478347
Hopefully she isn't the type to feel so bad after being scolded she gives up and lays in bed hating herself
>>
>>31478347
She... she's had a hard time since she got her powers. The past 9 years havent been too kind on her mental health so if you see her again be gentle
>>
>>31478347
You should buy that alcohol and cake you came for.
>>
>>31478347
Let's go visit Rena!
>>
>>31478347
Can we summon up a sleep monster to give her a nap?
We should summon up a sleep monster to give her a nap.
>>
>>31478347
Awww.
Well, mission successful. A productive day so far!
>>
>>31478403
>>31478347
DO THIS
>>
>>31478347
Good, now finish your shopping spree. You've got to get some cake, booze and something nice to cook to relax.

Don't forget to pay Cynthia's tab as well, she left without paying.
>>
>>31478347
How B, you're the best at relationship advice. It's a wonder you're still single.
>>
>>31478347
Go back home, buy some Decalf on the way back.

I hope she hasn't raided your coffee pot
>>
>>31478403
It won't work.

Caffo's biology isn't physically capable of sleep anymore.
>>
>>31478347
Ok girl, go do your shopping and return home. Your sister's probably already there sleeping off her caffeine high.
>>
>>31478403
>>31478412
She already left, anons
>>
>>31478347
>Still, she seems decent at least.

She is. Really she just wants people to like her. Be her friend and what not.

Anyways you should get stuff for a meal for your sis and head home.
>>
>>31478444
Supernatural>Pussy science
We put her in a magic sleep.
>>
>>31478347
now go get those some more booze.
>>
>>31478436
Heh heh heh.
Maybe there aren't actually any available girls in the city at all. They're either no substance relationship kinda gals like Caffo, or already taken.
>>
>>31478481
Rena and Brigette are both single
>>
Summon a yuki-onna and have her make caffornicator sleep.
I'm not an expert, but I think those were the monsters that lured travelers to rest in their hovels and then they sort of died from cold during their sleep or something?
>>
>>31478465
Are there any heroes who study pussy science?
>>
>>31478454
It's not a problem, all she'd have to do is summon the monster and task it to find and make her sleep.

But after summoning the She Ravager, Bridgette has got to be tired.

And it can't work on a girl with coffee for blood. Hell, it might even kill the sleep monster.

And you can't just neutralise the coffee in her blood because that might well kill Caffo.

If there were any easy answers to Caffo's condition, the Hero/Villain assosciation would have found it for her already.
>>
>>31478504
Chet has been known to pioneer that area.
>>
>>31478494
And lesbian/bi, obviously. I meant it in context of Bridgette's hunt for romance.
>>
>>31478403
she shouldn't even need to sleep, it's not like she's suffering, the amount of caffine in her system keeps her full of energy
>>
>>31478526
but chet is the homosex
>>
>>31478501
Yes! Have a monster put Caffo into a magical sleep, then wake her up a week later!
You'll get like a million bucks for putting an S rank into a coma, and she'll get some sleep! Win-win!
>>
>>31478501
Not really, Yuki-Onna(Snow Woman) is a ice type monster girl.
>>
>>31478494
But Rena is asexual and Bridgette is Renasexual!
>>
>>31478561
I'd hit it.
>>
>>31478522
>It's not a problem, all she'd have to do is summon the monster and task it to find and make her sleep.
And Caffornicator never woke up again~
>>
>>31478564
Yea, but weren't they the types that appeared during snowstorms and lured travelers to their final sleep or was that some other monster?
I think there was a monster like that in some folklore
>>
>>31478554
Every day she has a caffeine fugue, when her body replenishes it's caffeine, during which she gets distracted, sluggish and unresponsive.
>>
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Yeah, let me buy my stuff and leave.

>Bridgette does her shopping picking up booze, sweets, and even some decaf coffee for her sister. She pays for her stuff and Bridgette's as well. The owner is pretty used to this so he doesn't really question it much.
>She makes her way back home and finds Cynthia sprawled about on the couch.

As dignified as she tries to be it's kinda amusing to see her like this.
Still, I don't think I want to get drunk and watch sad movies while my sister is lying around.
>>
>>31478569
>But Rena is asexual
NegaRena is proof enough that is wrong.
>>
>>31478608
Get a blanket for her.
>>
>>31478608
DRAW A MUSTACHE ON HER
>>
>>31478608
cuddle up with that big warm tail and take a nap
>>
>>31478608
she is FUCKING ADORABLE.
make her some good food and a bottle of asprin for when she wakes up.
>>
>>31478608
Put a blanket on her.
>>
>>31478608
Well, first you should get a blanket for her.

And then doodle all over her face.
>>
>>31478603
Not really http://monstergirlencyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Yuki-Onna
>>
>>31478608
Get a blanket.
Cuddle with her and take a nap. You haven't done that since you were 8? Come on, it'll be nice.
>>
>>31478608
Take pictures, then take her to bed
>>
>>31478608
Molest that tail. You know you want to.
>>
>>31478608
Get her drunk too and watch the sad movies together
>>
>>31478347
Are you gonna go out with Rider again sometime?
>>
>>31478640
Huh, that's not the worst idea. Can you do the Naga thing too?

>>31478636
This is gonna hurt later when she wakes up, but SO worth it
>>
>>31478608
>Still, I don't think I want to get drunk and watch sad movies while my sister is lying around.
Is this your usual evening entertainment?
If so you should get out more girl.
Anyway, cook her some food she can reheat when she wakes up!
>>
>>31478608
Why not? This way you can both get drunk and be sad together!
>>
>>31478680
>can you do the naga thing too?

good question!
>>
>>31478608
If something's getting you down, you could talk about it with us.

>captcha: glisaina anonymous
>>
>>31478608
Take a picture and send it to Sparkle.

Also doodle her face.
>>
>>31478666
But that's incest
>>
>>31478724
Wincest is best
>>
>>31478608
Get her a blanket, and go make something to eat.
She'll wake up when she smells your delicious cooking.

Or, if you're tired, just cuddle up next to her.
>>
>>31478608
Put her hand in a bowl of warm water.
>>
>>31478753
Put her hand in something warm and wet
>>
>>31478724
Nothing wrong with that.
>>
>>31478769
coffee
>>
>>31478724
Yes, and...?
>>
>>31478793
I don't think Bridgette is into incest
>>
>>31478785
haha
she might actually kill us
like, really
kill us to death
>>
>>31478814
We will find out in a moment
>>
>>31478832
imagine the look on her face when she realized she was pranked with a hot pot of coffee, combined with the awful headache.

the pure moment of coffee hell.
>>
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>>31478666
Ew, no. What if I, like, touch her hidden snake bits or something?

And as tempting as it would be to cuddle I don't know. She might bite me. Don't think that me being her sister prevents that.

She does look really cute like that, though. I've never seen her look so vulnerable. I think I'm the only one who sees her like this.
And I can say the same for her. She's been with me the past few weeks to help me out over.. My own problems.
A lot better than she used to 'help' too.

>>31478680
I can't turn into a naga. I could turn into a small ordinary snake, though.

Not gonna prank her this time. Maybe a time where she's not already cranky.

>Bridgette brings her a blanket and tucks her sister in. Her tail still sticks out at the end but it's good enough.

She starts cooking a nice dinner for the two of them and puts away her alcohol.

>>31478685
Hey... Don't beat me up over how I spend my days. Nothing else to do.
My days is pretty much work, hang out with Rena, get drunk.
That's a totally functional not unhealthy for me way to spend my day.
>>
>>31478937
C'mon girl, no wonder you're single if the only way you meet people is through your work.
>>
>>31478937
consider replacing getting drunk with a hobby. or a drug that is less damaging to your liver.

Getting drunk is fine, just not every day. gotta give the old organs time to cope.
>>
>>31478937
Isn't it bad for Cynthia's mental state to be part monster all the time?

I vaguely recall that making her a bit more unstable than normal.
>>
>>31478937
What about Rider? Did you two go out to have a drink or something?
>>
>>31478937
All that time spent with Rena didn't teach you it's important to make friends? You're more of a wreck then I thought.
>>
>>31478937
You should take up a hobby.
Maybe you should git gud at vidya gaem, then maybe Rena-senpai will notice you.
>>
>>31478937
>>31478990

Yeah might wanna tell her to into human when she wakes up.
>>
>>31478937
You seriously have to get a girlfriend or a hobby.
>>
>>31478937
Do you hang out with people besides Rena? Because as nice as it is to spend time with your friends, it's best to have more than one.
>>
>>31478937
Have you considered getting an education? Relying on your natural abilities is fine and all, but are you really happy with that? You're a bright and intelligent woman, you could be doing so much more. Better yourself. Get out there in the world and find people you can talk to, and not just about your problems. Find someone to love who can love you back.

And don't use EvilRena as an excuse. The world's always almost ending. Go to school, fool.
>>
>>31478937
You need a hobby....

Seriously, drinking doesn't count.

Take up gardening or stock market trading or whatever you crazy kids do these days
>>
>>31478937
Do you get drunk EVERY day? That's alcoholism if so. Though I guess if it isn't disruptive it's okay.

That said, don't you have other friends to hang out with? A hobby could be good too. Speaking of friends, how did the date with Rider go, aside from what we saw? Is that worth pursuing, do you think?
>>
>>31479022
>You're a bright and intelligent woman
Dude, she's got a doctorate in Villainology.

Which she stole. Naturally.
>>
>>31479023
oh, gardening!
MONSTER gardening!
Monster gardening would be SUPER FUN bridgette!

>>31478937
Monster plants!
>>
>>31478990
>>31479009
b-but her outfits arent nearly as cute in human form :(
>>
>>31479042
That's one of the only ways to earn it. The other is the slaughter of hundreds.
>>
>>31479058
and bridgette doesnt kill people
>>
>>31478937
Go out. Buy Legos. Build your own Lego Fort.

Then have the Magical Monster over and have fun with your nephew.
>>
>>31479023
Hey, gardening is a good idea! There's all sorts of plant-related monsters.

Speaking of monsters, Bridgette, did you summon the female Spine Ravager permanently somehow or will you wind up dismissing it eventually? Or can you just not dismiss it, forever?
>>
>>31478937
I like the sound of gardening, you should look into that. Maybe you can get a new plant for Rena; it's kind of weird that she keeps a potted stick in her apartment.
>>
>>31478990
I think it was more being a vampire all the time was bad.
>>
>>31479082
>Legos
DIE IN A GODDAMN FIRE
>>
>>31478937
Call over Rider, see if she wants to eat dinner with us and Cynthia.
>>
>>31479091
It's probably sentimental.
>>
>>31479095
Irregardless.
>>
>>31479082
More like:
Go out. Buy Lego. Stick thumbtacks through the bottom of bricks and scatter them around the city.
>>
>>31479091
WOAH WOAH WOAH
Bridgette isn't NEARLY evil enough to leave a poor helpless plant in Rena's care
>>
>>31479121
She's a Monster, not a monster
>>
are there any windows in rena's apartment?

is stick getting any sun AT ALL?
>>
>>31478937
Bridgette since you're a villain, any day job you pick must be equally villainous.

You must become a lawyer.
>>
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>>31479122
>poor helpless plant
I think the plan was to breed a plant which WASN'T helpless, though I fear that might backfire.

I've seen enough movies to know how THAT can backfire.
>>
>>31479163
If there weren't before, there's certainly one now.
>>
>>31479188
wha?
>>
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>>31478937
>Cynthia confirmed for hidden snake bits
ФωФ
>>
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>>31479042
Several, even.

>>31478990
She mentioned she's been getting over it. Her snake for is just so natural and actually calming for her. If she becomes a spider or something then I have to worry.

Gardening sounds like it would be fun, actually. Not even for the monster plant but I could grow my own food like onions and stuff. That would be pretty nice.
I'll think about it.

>>31479091
Ha, no. I think a cactus would die under her care.

>>31479082
Speaking of Magical Monster that kid is adorable. It kinda makes me want my own kid someday. Just, you know, I don't want to deal with the whole forcing something out of my vagina bit. If only everyone could just have a magical egg baby.

I wish all the people at work weren't such asses. Then I might have some more friends.

>>31479036
Oh, Rider. She's... I don't know. When we went out to go eat it just looked like she wasn't really paying me any attention. Halfway through she just got up and left with just a quick goodbye.
So, I'm not sure if that will go anywhere.
>>
>>31479225
yessss
>>
>>31479272
Are you going naked apron?
>>
>>31479272
Keep your hair like that, you look cute.
>>
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>>31479121
>>
>>31479272
Holy crap, you look adorable.
>>
>>31479272
rider has a lot of problems.

most of them involve being FULL OF A SWARM OF GHOSTS.

anyway, maybe try making friends outside of work?

or, even what heroes do you fight besides rena?
>>
>>31479272
You just have to keep dragging her into the real world. The woman's life has been eaten up by her spirits, try to help her out and maybe lighten her burden.

Also, keep your hair like that forever, it's fucking amazing.
>>
>>31479272
What, babies aren't worth vagina trauma? It's not like there'd even be aftereffects cause you can regen and junk.
>>
>>31479301
She ALWAYS look cute.
>>
>>31479301
Pigtails > Ponytail

>>31479272
>It kinda makes me want my own kid someday. Just, you know, I don't want to deal with the whole forcing something out of my vagina bit. If only everyone could just have a magical egg baby.

Well, maybe you could try summoning Magical Vampire Rena from another universe. She's a magical girl, so she'd have that there magical egg.
>>
>>31479272
You should grow out your hair.
>>
>>31479272
Hey... are vengeful spirits a type of monster? Because you might be able to pull the ghosts outa Rider once in a while to give her some peace and quiet.
>>
>>31479272
Ooh! Ooh! I've got an idea!

You could start a gaming club at the Villain Association. Find a few other evildoers who are into video games, get them all together and play. Maybe you could even have a tournament against the heroes!
>>
>>31479335
You know not of what you speak, mortal. Childbirth is the universe's way of saying 'fuck you and the horse you rode in on'.
>>
>>31479272
Well, surely you have SOME interests beyond binge drinking, movies and Rena? List them and we'll help!
>>
>>31479272
Have you gone to visit Anti-Hero? Now that the demon is gone she's not fucking crazy anymore and I imagine she's quite lonely in that hospital.
>>
>>31479272
God damn you look adorable. You're always adorable, but this is a whole new level.
>>
>>31479361
Isn't Rider a Dullahan? Bridgette could probably summon her and control the spirits so they can't bother her anymore, hell she should try that, like, now.
>>
>>31479368
If you're fucking horses, I wouldn't expect the process to give you much trouble.
>>
>>31479390
this is a good idea.
do this one.
>>
>>31479386
Binge watching videos of Rena
Binge drinking Rena
>>
>>31479272
Is there a villainous equivalent to Shadow Man?

You know, some creepy guy who seems to spy on everyone?

Might be a good idea to pay him a visit and see if there are any more "punchclock" villains like yourself that could be good company.
>>
>>31479272
>It kinda makes me want my own kid someday. Just, you know, I don't want to deal with the whole forcing something out of my vagina bit.
You might be able to work around that. You can transform your body into monster parts, right? Does that include male monsters?
>>
>>31479272
Do you even have any place to grow plant.

Queen of the World has some good fertilizer in her back yards, you should take some
>>
>>31479272
>>31479301
>>31479315
>>31479329
>>31479350
>>31479394
How did Rena not fall for you. You're the cutest thing this side of Magical Monster
>>
>>31479272
Summon Rider and chat with her a bit.
>>
>>31479402
nah, she survived being beheaded, but isn't a dullahan, just has superpowers.
>>
>>31479428
Ahahahaha!
>>
>>31479428
Rena just has zero taste. She's like that 3slapdude guy. Doesn't know the perfect girl when she's right in front of them.
>>
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>>31479272
Hey, you should go see Anti-Hero if you have the chance. The poor girl probably doesn't know that Ignis will reincarnate and blames herself for that demon killing him.
Might do you some good to mess around with other people.

>>31479428
I know, right?
>>
>>31479272
Can you summon Ignus from Hell? He was kind of a dick but seemed okay otherwise.
>>
>>31479423
Oh yeah this is a good point. I bet Rena likes kids more than you, she might agree to platonic parenthood. Platonic fucking.
>>
>>31479428
She's into something else.
We don't know what yet, but it's not cute girl, it's not ravaging monster, and it's not douchebag and/or stalkery dude. The search continues.
>>
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>>31479364
>>
>>31479433
>Rider gets compelled to kill Bridgette for obstructing her missions.
>No more MM+

Bridgette can't even summon her anyway.
>>
>>31479421
Dark Stranger? Isn't he Shadow Man's archenemy or something?

And Rena's ex boyfriend?
>>
>>31479484
>>31479364

>villain/hero gaming tourneys
>>
>>31479466
THIS.

Maybe we can start getting that girl vaguely on the path to not being a fucking psycho.
>>
>>31479402
We should ask before doing anything like that. Heroes like her tend to have complicated feelings about their powers; I think she genuinely wants to be a hero eve nif the spirits are bothering her.
>>
>>31479466
Yeah, Anti-Hero might need some love.

Platonic love.
>>
>>31479521
She's not a psycho, it was the demon inside her head that was messing with her.
>>
I hope Bridgette is wearing nothing under that apron and feeds Cynthia the food she cooked
>>
>>31479615
and dealing with that for years magically had no lasting effects? It must be nice living in whatever world you come from
>>
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I'm not cute...
Monster.
Villainous Monster.

Also I'm not naked, I'm wearing a tanktop. And I always put my hair up when I cook. I did so when Rena came by that first time.

>>31479424
Does she? I'll ask her.

>>31479335
Just the very phrase vagina trauma makes me shudder.

>>31479433
>>31479486
I... I actually might be able to do that. But I'd rather not. I don't want to bother her.

>>31479423
I can't transform my body parts. I can only turn into a small monster-ish thing. Snakes, bats, rats, spiders. Stuff like that. Only big sis and big bro can do that. And my nephew, I suppose.

>>31479466
Rider did mention that she told Anti-Hero that Ignis survived. She just didn't do so til he left her body. She has a hard time doing some things.

Also I didn't know Rider was like a Dullahan. That would explain the smoke coming out of her neck and the feeling of doom surrounding her. I thought she just channeled spirits and was immortal or something. But as far as I can tell she's not a natural monster. She was created.

>>31479402
>>31479527
That's the thing, I guess. I could probably summon all those spirits out of her and banish them. But vengeful spirits are tricky. It might possess me. Maybe break out of my summon.
And how would she feel about it? As far as I can tell she enjoys these spirits. At least she enjoys being able to help them a bit.

Maybe I could ask her about it.
>>
>>31479689
Asking her sounds like a good idea to me. Maybe she could let them in part-time, do it like a day job thing.
>>
>>31479689
she doesn't need the spirits to go away, she just needs like, a bit of quiet time.
>>
>>31479689
do it!

Help rider!
>>
>>31479689
Yeah, talk about it and junk. Talking is good, it's how Rena does the shit she does. That and remarkable adorableness, but you're no slouch in that area yourself.
>>
>>31479689
>Also I'm not naked, I'm wearing a tanktop.
All my dreams, dashed
>>
>>31479689
Talking is always the way to go! Surely everything has taught you this, from your misadventures pursuing Rena, to today's events! Besides, it's the nice thing to do.
>>
>>31479769
Well, she's still naked from time to time anon. Unless she's a nevernude. Just imagine things
>>
>>31479689
>Just the very phrase vagina trauma makes me shudder.
You know, as a Monster you SHOULD be eligible for reproduction by Monster egg...
Tricky thing though. You may be TOO human for it. Hard to tell.

>>31479689
>She was created.
and there's the kernel of the mystery.

Who and why would answer a lot of questions.


...son of a bitch. You know who you need to ask, don't you? Only bloody Caffornicator
>>
>>31479689
You're adorable, waaay too adorable.

Also, go help Rider.
>>
>>31479689
The woman could use the human interaction. Well, live human interaction.

Just chat about things, try to get her interested in the real world and maybe how you can help her enjoy it a bit more instead of constantly just trying to help the spirits. Maybe encourage her to do fun things for her spirits?
>>
>>31479804
Its magical girl egg, not monster egg
wat
>>
>>31479689
If you and Rider ever hook up, you would be Eskimo sisters with Caffornicator. So, there's that.
>>
>>31479689
Why not put them all in a glass jar? That way she can put the spirits back into her when she wants to.
>>
>>31479689
Yeah, asking her about it wouldn't hurt.
Maybe ask your dad and Sparkle about dealing with wraiths and stuff. They're the experts on monsters and magical things, right?
>>
>>31479845
Genius, do it.
>>
>>31479689
>>31479816

That might help a bit. While all of those spirits are hungry for vengeance, there's a chance that doing other things might cause them to let go of their thirst for revenge and move on.

Although there are a LOT of spirits egging Rider on. If she tallies for too long, they might do something drastic.
>>
>>31479845
What if she drops the jar
>>
>>31479888
Dont. Drop. The. SoapJar.
>>
>>31479888
Make it a steel jar, then.
>>
>>31479928
Isn't that a can?
>>
>>31479888
What if EdgeMurder wears the jar as a hat?
>>
What if Rena finds the jar and puts jam in it because she thinks it's empty
>>
>>31479962
You get a happy ghost. Who the hell doesn't like jam?
>>
>>31479981
I like jam but that doesn't mean I want to be covered in it
>>
>>31479998
What are you, Gay?
>>
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>>31479998
What if I want you to be covered in it?
>>
>>31480033
This is getting too close to ERPing about jam
>>
>>31479888
Remember Ghostbusters?

Probably something like that.
>>
>>31479998
You are a weird man.
>>
>>31479962
What if Rena then eats the jam?
>>
>>31480086
This is my fetish
>>
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Guys, focus. Enough with jam.

>Bridgette calls up Rider and asks her if she can come over. The Hero says she'll try.
>She never says for sure, just that she'll try her best.
>Bridgette continues cooking. After she finishes her sister still hasn't woken up so she lets her sleep. There's a knock at the door.
>She opens it up and sees Rider in more casual clothing.

Ri: "I'm sorry if I'm late."

"It's fine. Come on in, I was just about to serve dinner."

>Rider walks inside in that oddly stiff way she walks. Being inside Bridgette's home doesn't seem to agree with her and Bridgette can see some sweat on her forehead as the hero sits at her table.
>Bridgette serves the two of them her dish and they eat in relative silence.Bridgette does her best not to stare but she can't help but glace each time Rider swallows, almost expecting the food to go through her neck. It seems solid enough, however, and they eat without incident.

Ri: "Bridgette. I apologize for running out on you last time. I had something to do."

"I understand. You're a dullahan, aren't you?"

Ri: "Not... Not exactly. Close. I am still alive. There is no word to describe exactly what I am. I just use Rider."

"That's fine. You know... I could remove the spirits if you want You know, make it quieter."

>Her suggestions has an immediate effect on Rider. Her eyes go wide and she sits there, a fork still clutched in her hand.
>Minutes pass by in absolute silence before she finally speaks up.

Ri: "I appreciate the offer but I can not take it. I am the Rider. Without me who will fulfill these spirits last wishes? They all want things. Some want me to stab you, some want me to kiss you, others want to see their family, some just want to continue living through me. If I were not here they would not have that. How can I take that away?""

"Then let me just, I don't know, seal them up."

Ri: "You could only truly seal them in a person. Like me. Thank you, but no. I must stay as I am."

She doesn't sound pleased.
>>
>>31479484
Yes! Tear down the barriers between the forces of good and evil! Break the system upon which you all rely!
Such is the face of chaos, and in its eyes you shall see glory!

>>31479689
Pretty sure she was created out of a living woman.
We need to free her from her curse at some point. The dead are not meant to linger on, and while I'm fine with letting that slide I'll not abide by it coming at the expense of the living.

>As far as I can tell she enjoys these spirits.
She hates it. Imagine trying to live with voices screaming in your head dictating everything you do, and giving you no rest until you cave to their desires. It's like what you're experiencing now, except everybody is yelling and a psychotic asshole.
She's a slave even in her own mind.

She doesn't enjoy it, it's just the only peace she has is from her masters whims being shouted at her somewhat less acidly.

She used to cry over it. Now she's too broken to cry.
>>
Bridgette should cover herself in jam, maybe then Rena would eat her.
>>
>>31480172
Rider is cute in a scary way
Anyway, she should totally listen to the spirits that want her to kiss you. Encourage that and avoid the topic of sealing/destroying spirits.
>>
>>31480172
Summon a soul-eating abomination, trap it in a tesseract labyrinth.
>>
>>31480172
Kiss Rider.
You can lessen her burden by making some of the spirits happy.
>>
>>31480178
That's not how it works.

You're supposed to cover yourself in lasagne.
>>
>>31480172
It's ok, I understand. I just wanted to offer you the choice
sorry about the jam
>>
>>31480172
You know who could use a fuckton of insanity voices?
Evil!Rena.
>>
>>31480172
Ask what would happen to the spirits if she was not channeling them. Might as well try to understand things!

Also, aren't these spirits being awfully selfish by taking away her life just so they can bitch and moan about how unfair it is they're dead?
>>
>>31480175
>Imagine trying to live with voices screaming in your head dictating everything you do, and giving you no rest until you cave to their desires. It's like what you're experiencing now, except everybody is yelling and a psychotic asshole.
Oh shit

just like us
>>
>>31480172
ah well, figured it was worth offering.
So, how's the hero gig been treating ya?
>>
>>31480172
Just let it go, if she said know then no need to push the subject.

Just wanted to see if she was up for it.

With that said why don't you go to Queen of the World's place and get some fertilizer.
>>
>>31480172
Tell her that you hear voices too! But yours are mostly trying to get you to hook-up with people.
>>
>>31480172
Put them in Rena. She'll calm them all through the powers of friendship, unhealthy food, and videogames.
>>
>>31480172
Summon legion. Shove spirits into Legion's infinite supply of bodies.

Or hire a mad scientist to clone a bunch of bodies for the spirits to live in.
>>
>>31480244
Also they can be disturbingly lewd and/or moronic.
>>
>>31480172
> Without me who will fulfill these spirits last wishes? They all want things. Some want me to stab you, some want me to kiss you, others want to see their family, some just want to continue living through me. If I were not here they would not have that. How can I take that away?

It really sounds like the spirits are engaging in a right hand vs left hand struggle. It's probably for the best that they move on. People managed to die peacefully before Rider was around. Rider doesn't NEED to do this. These spirits are denying Rider a life of her own in order to (unnecessarily) cling to a life that is already over.

Also, which spirits want to kiss Bridgette?
>>
>>31480172
Hey MM+, do you think the voices that keep talking to you and giving you advice and Rider have some relation?
>>
>>31480172
Maybe you could just... spread them out a bit? You get how what she does is important to her, but there's no reason all of that burden has to be on just one person. The spirits could be sated and find rest faster this way.

Also... what does Rider want?
>>
>>31480172
If a kiss would silence some of the voices for a bit, I wouldn't mind lending a hand again
>>
>>31480172
She could use a hug.

They won't get the things they desire if they kill her in the process, right? And she looks pretty bad. So maybe if they're willing to collaborate, or get in a line or something. Maybe have a maximum number of voices set, and each leaves once their wish is granted. Those jars could keep them locked away until their turn is up.

Bridgette, can you talk with the Spirits? Maybe help them reach an understanding with Rider?
>>
>>31480172
So, what does she want to do? Maybe she can find a way to tune them out for short periods, just to get a break, or properly evaluate a situation on her own terms.
>>
>>31480172
"I didn't mean get rid of them, just... move them outside of your head. Maybe we could stick them in amulets or something so other people could help with the easier ones, like seeing family or something. I mean, that way you could help them even faster.
They can't be opposed to getting their turn sooner, can they?

... Hey, I only got one person killed! What's their problem with me?!?"
>>
>>31480172

These spirits really need to get their shit together and form some sort of spirit-committee. Or some sorta system where they get in line and petition a request for Rider to carry out, instead of just all screaming at her in one disturbing cacophony.
>>
>>31480232
Except Rider's spirits have direct power over her body. Can you imagine what would have happened if we could assume direct control of Rena or Bridgette?
>>
>>31480175
>except everybody is yelling and a psychotic asshole
>wheredoyouthinkweare.jpg
>>
>>31480332
Most will just make them want to have kiss and sex with each other.
>>
>>31480175
So, does that mean Rider;s the heroine of her own quest thread, from like 7chan or 420chan? Or which ever chan if full of assholes?
>>
So does this mean we are dead heroes
>>
>>31480332
[ASSUME DIRECT CONTROL OF THIS FORM]
"FUCK YOU, SPIRITS! AND FUCK YOUR WISHES!"

>>31480359
Mostly civil and polite. Mostly.
>>
>>31480378
No, we're dead NEET civilians.
>>
>>31480172
point at rider
"Allright, you. you. yes, you. spirits. stop giving the girl such a hard time, she chooses to keep you, the least you can do is give her some peace now and again."
>>
>>31480376
larro secretly speaks japanese and runs a parrallel quest controlling rider on 2ch
>>
>>31480378
We're the target demographic.
>>
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>>31480172
She might not be so ok, Bridgette. Just sayin'.
>>
I wonder how MM+ is taking our discussion of our existence?
>>
You know, half the people we ran into seem to have problems with getting some rest.
Rider, Caffo, Cynthia, all need some sleep.

Bridgette, you need to become the sleep fairy.
>>
>>31480172
That's what the spirits want to do, but what does she want to do? If they were shared by more than one person, then maybe she'd have some more time to herself.

Come to think of it, does she have any spirits from the alternate world?
>>
>>31480332
lot of /u/things, I assume.

>>31480172
>I am the Rider. Without me who will fulfill these spirits last wishes?
But you weren't always, were you?

So what did they do before you?
>>
>>31480172
Those spirits are such dumb assholes
ONCE YOURE DEAD YOU DONT MATTER CAUSE YOURE FUCKING DEAD
They should just pass on
And if they don't want to pass on they should be forced to because they're dickbags who can't accept their own death
>>
>>31480472
This! Rider backstory go!
>>
"i didn't ask what the spirits want, i asked what YOU want"
>>
>>31480477
This, we should say to the spirits that if they don't start to bother Rider less we are going to seal them, even if against her will.
>>
>>31480172
Hey MM+, You have experience dealing with Voices in your head (AKA Us) why don't you give advice about that?
>>
>>31479834
There are Monster eggs too, chummo.

Adorable nephew is a result of both
>>
>>31480332
Wonderful things.
>>
>>31480482
This, do this cutie.
>>
>>31480477
>>31480489
That's not very fair. If you had a second chance at life, you'd take it.
>>
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>>31480482
Seconding
>>
>>31480521
Sure, but destroying a life of a people because of that is not the right thing to do.
>>
Couldn't we find someone else to do the job and summon the spirits into them for a while? Let Rider have some time off?
>>
>>31480521
Exactly, and I would be an immature dickbag for it and I should be forced out of whoever I'd possess
>>
>>31480503
More like rapeful things
>>
>>31480555
You mean... make a jar golem?
>>
>>31480555
Or maybe just divide them up. Rider could handle spirits with positive, temporary desires and someone else could handle more vengeful desires.

The spirits who want to stick around permanently can get booted off to the afterlife.
>>
>>31480555
Sound like a job for Rena, she would somehow manage to convince every single one of them to go the after life in less than a day.
>>
>>31480555
We probably COULD. The question is whether we SHOULD.

This is part of what Rider is. Brirdgette knows it's not fun when something you're supposed to be is taken away from you.
>>
>>31480587
>>31480584
>>31480582

I was thinking more just let Rider and some aspiring hero switch off every few days, but those might work too!
>>
>>31480625
That will break a lesser hero, and the more stronger heroes will take the challenge
>>
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"Have you tried just asking them to chill out?"

Ri: "Some listen. Some are so kind. Some."

"Well maybe we could just... I don't know. Stick them in an amulet or something. Make it so you only have to deal with a few out a time."

>A faint smile appears on Rider's face. She shakes her head and looks at Bridgette.

Ri: "I appreciate what you're trying to do but I signed up for this. I knew what could happen. I just... There's just so many. At first it was easy. But then it got worse and worse. Some just don't leave. But I want this. I want them to be happy. I want to allow them a few more joys in life, at least until mine is gone. Is that so bad?"

"Honestly? I think it is. Yes they deserve some happiness but they shouldn't get it by ruining your life. They're just being jerks and trying to cling to something they've lost. You don't deserve this and they should realize that."

Ri: "I agree but..."

>Rider looks away from her.
>For a moment she thinks she's hurt the Hero's feelings but when she catch's a glimpse of her face she can see that she looks... Furious. Then her expression relaxes and she stands up.

Ri: "I need to go."

"Rider, I-"

Ri: "Goodbye, Bridgette."

>She leaves. Bridgette stands there and sighs.

Screwed that up.
I wish I could help the girl.
Maybe some other time.

C: "My my~"

Goddammit.

C: "Was that Rider? In a turtleneck~? I've never seen the girl out of her armor~"

"Not now, sis."

C: "My dear little sister, already setting her sights on another hero~"

"Seriously."

C: "Hehe, I think it's cute. I'm just glad to see you're trying to make new friends."

"And I'm glad to see you're all better."

C: "You know we heal fast~ I smell your delicious cooking. May I have some?"

"Help yourself. I think I'm going to go and just sleep... Don't bother me."

C: "I won't~"

Lies.

>Bridgette goes to bed. Without booze to help her sleep her mind turns to the problems around her and she tries to think of how to fix them.
>No solutions come to mind.
>>
>>31480625
Or some aspiring villain~
By the way I wonder if you can push spirits into monsters
>>
All new heroes get one free spirit implanted courtesy of Rider. There, Rider is eventually free and Bridgette gets tons of money from the villains association
>>
>>31480577
Those things aren't mutually exclusive.
>>
>>31480651
>no solutions come to mind
how about more alchohol?
>>
>>31480651
>For a moment she thinks she's hurt the Hero's feelings but when she catch's a glimpse of her face she can see that she looks... Furious.
Huh.

Wonder what that's about.
>>
>>31480651
If you ever want help with your problems you have but to ask. We will do our best
>>
>>31480651
Double chapter?
>>
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>>31480651
>Screwed that up. I wish I could help the girl. Maybe some other time.

Dammit.
>>
>>31480651
ara ara~
>>
>>31480711
And a drop of Nelson's blood wouldn't do us any harm...
>>
>>31480727
Some of the spirits started wanting to kill Bridgette.
She got pissed off at them, and decided to leave before her will gave up.
>>
Queenie is the closest thing we have to a necromancer around here.
Could we ask her for advice on how to deal with the dead?
>>
>>31480651
I don't think we fucked that up too badly, it was probably the spirits that were furious. Hopefully they are busy debating inside of her for a while, and she just needed to get out of there before the spirits tried to kill Bridgette.

As for the double quest: MOAR CYNTHIA
>>
>>31480651
>>31480787
CYNTHIA ADVENTURES
>>
>>31480729
Larro ran out of plot
>>
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So ends another chapter. Thanks for reading everyone, it was a pleasure to run as always. Time for the next one will be posted on twitter as usual.
>>31480729
I planned on doing one but then accidentally burned through all my plot points this chapter. But it's spring break and I'm off til school resumes so the next chapter shouldn't be too long from now.
>>
>>31480727
If I had to guess, it's one of the spirits.

You're coming at this wrong. What Rider is doing is right. It's a good thing,

The problem is that there's a balance to be observed in these things.

I think there's some clues there, though.

> Some just don't leave.
>>
>>31480651
Do you know any shamans, necromancers or voodoo doctors? Pretty sure those people are in the same business as rider, at least to a degree. Could help her to know she's not the only one helping the dead.
>>
>>31480651
Bridgette, you can always take a few of these spirits to help her with the burden and if you talk with about it she would help.
>>
>>31480806
Brb, getting brain bleach
>>
We need a sidechapter with lilies in.
>>
>>31480806
Why not do just another casual Rena doing stupid stuff?
>>
>>31480806

Is there a chance that we'll be seeing more of Robo-maid soon? It seems like it's been some time since she's been in here outside of the art you do.
>>
>>31480819
There's a lot of Rider plot and backstory to be uncovered, I think
>>
>>31480853
This. Maybe we could intervene with Rider and the spirits. It'd be interesting to try and convince her we aren't just the usual fare of voices that try to control her every move.
>>
>>31480843
This, please.
>>
>>31480843
Whenever Rena does stupid stuff she also moves the plot
>>
>>31480806
Just make a Olivia chapter or Queen or Sparkle or Rider.
>>
>>31480806
Most of this quest has just been reacting to plot points. We've never had a chance to go out and check up on dangling plot threads of our own accord.
>>
>>31480819
>Some just don't leave.
>Forced into consensus: >Minutes pass by in absolute silence before she finally speaks up.
>You could only truly seal them in a person.
There must always be a rider? The problem only arises when some refuse to leave, leading into a backup of spirits. We remove the NEET Spirits and we're find.
Maybe the NEET spirits committed a great crime, and are trying to avoid going to hell, and occupy their time by making rider do inane shit?
>>
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>>31480885
RAINDROPS AND RENA

IT IS TIME.
>>
Let's take Rena to a stripclub.
>>
>>31480895
Maybe the spirits that don't move on into the great beyond are keeping her body hostage?
>>
>>31480910
she wouldnt get it
>>
>>31480910
>"Young miss! Shouldn't you put some clothes on? You'll catch a cold like that!"
>>
>>31480902
We never seen the car in awhile
>>
>>31480806
so, how long until spine ravager and spine ravagette make a spine ravababy?
>>
>>31480895
You know, if there always has to be a Rider, there's one person who knows more about that than we do.

And that's Raindrops, as the historian and archaeologist.
>>
>>31480933
Spine Wavager?
>>
>>31480933
five minutes ago
>>
If Rena and NegaRena kiss do they explode?
>>
>>31480945
Adorable
>>
>>31480967
no, but Bridette might
>>
>>31480967
No. They'll merge and become Transcendental Rena.
>>
>>31480986
Like in the Dark Crystal?
>>
>>31480921
someone post that copypasta from /b/
>>
>>31481004
Yes, Rena will become a perfect being. Which means she'll have long hair in a pony tail.
>>
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>>31480843
That's pretty much what I have planned next but as much as I say I like to wing these chapter's there's still just the tiniest bit of planning. My usual double chapters are a result of my thread about to 404 before a plot point is resolved and then has other random stuff occur after that.

>>31480894
>>31480902
I'll definitely keep these in mind for the next one. But don't worry, it'll be soon. I can say that much.

>>31480850
She's a really fun character and I wouldn't mind having a chapter that's more about her. Right now she's taking her training rather seriously. Rena's just glad she can be lazier.

>>31480933
Average time is 15 years. Sparkle's child will grow up in an interesting world.
>>
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>>31480986

*SO YOU HAVE COME*

*AND YOU WILL *---- is that Mario Kart?
>>
>>31481060
Rena with different hairstyles when?
>>
>>31481066
We never see the rangers, they seemed like an imporant plot point at one time considering one of them was the mayors daughter.

So no double chapter?
>>
>>31481066
>Robomaid
>training
why would a robot train? She should just get her cleaning software upgraded by prince.
>>
I wish Rena would have given Spine Ravager a chance.
>>
>>31481066
Are Rena and Raindrops related? And who're Rena's parents?
>>
If Rena and NegaRena combine they'll form one totally normal person.
>>
>>31481160
I wish Rena would have given any romantic relationship a chance Bridgette ;n;
>>
>>31481160
you don't need a relationship to be happy.
>>
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>>31481193
>Bridgette and Rena will never be happy together in any universe
>>
>>31481170
If Larro doesn't say, anyone you want.
>>
>>31481272
But Rena has to know who her parents were, right?
>>
>>31481286
She only mentioned her mom. Never talks about her dad.
>>
>>31481286
She was raised by rocks
>>
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>>31481245
>>
Larro. Once again, wonderful job
>>
I want to eat jam off Rena's body
>>
>>31481378
I want to eat jam off YOUR body
>>
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>>31481378
Sure you do.
>>
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>>31481404
>>
>>31481404
>>31481378
Jam party anyone
>>
>>31481426
Only if it's lemon jam
>>
>>31481421
Does jam taste better or worse when eaten off a sweaty fit Rena?
>>
>>31481440
It can be lemon for you
>>
>>31481449
Yes.
>>
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We need to get Jade a new gun.
>>
>MFW I just got a new job
>Larro's commission box is open
>And all of these characters are so good

Must resist. MUST RESIST.
>>
>>31482007
She hasn't needed the one she has yet.
>>
>>31482034
Nah man, you don't need to resist at all.

You know you want to commission Queenie, naked, and covered in honey, being licked clean by Raindrops.


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