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/tg/ - Traditional Games


>Twitter: https://twitter.com/HalflingQM
>http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Paladin%20Quest

You are Fei Yu Xiang, Knight of the Moon, Defender of Man and Blade of the People.

You have had a most eventful day - or, as it turns out, three days, though you only spent one of them conscious. Your horse died crushing zombies beneath its feet while you charged recklessly at their master. You saved a fair maiden from the assault of a once gentle man driven mad by his hunger and ambition. You learned of the root of this village's distress and recent disappearances, and uncovered a pair of vampires. One, a good man whose mind had rotted away by hunger, you slew as a stranger picked off his minions from afar, at the cost of your life. The other, a fair maiden whose gentle nature held her hunger at bay for thousands of years, drained what little blood remained in you to save it, in her own way.

You are presently in the house of said fair maiden, lying in her bed while she feeds you a soup of tomatoes and deer's blood. The transition took a toll on your body - even if you are "alive" right now, you did die out there. But even with the first sip of the deer's blood you feel the color and warmth of life and wellness return to you, chasing away the aches and mothballs and pains in your head. It feels like the opiates the doctors at the monastery would give you for a broken leg or deep cut - and you've seen what they can do to a man if not used in moderation. No wonder most vampires fall like Alfons did; he was an addict.

You grasp Cheng'e's hand as she turns for a wet towel.
>>
>>32354710

"My lady, you and Carver spoke of Hunger Kings and Queens and Princes," you manage to croak. She flushes a bit, whether at your words or your touch you do not know. "I know the first two from the stories of old, how they held their court in a city floating above Lake Zhongda and made their marvelous works of wonder and terror upon the Isle of Dawn. But the second - you've made one of me, and I know not what that means."

She smiles small and slight. Pulling a chair over from her desk, she takes a seat beside your bed, and clasps he other hand about yours.

"I-It's rather simple, really," she starts. "W-We... who hunger... the w-way to take the stillness of the earth into our...ourselves is l-lost. Gone, for the betterment of all; w-we made sure of th-that once w-we understood the consequences of o-our hubris. The curse can only p-pass from older... o-one who hungers to another, through t-total exsanguination. With each g-generation, the powers of the curse wane, and the madness of it waxes, like imperfections multiplying in a manuscript hand copied over the ages.

"As I-I'm one of the o-originals, yours is a nearly perfect copy." She turns her head away, hanging it in shame, refusing to meet your eyes. "I-I'm sorry..."

>My Lady, you have nothing to apologize for.
>Don't be. My Lady, I shall bear this curse as you have, and turn it against the darkness.
>And I am sorry. I was a fool, and had I not been foolish, you would have not needed to turn me.
>[Write In]
>>
>>32354731

Phone voting so can't write out but options 1 and 2
>>
>>32354731
>Don't be. My Lady, I shall bear this curse as you have, and turn it against the darkness.

I'd just like to say, OP, I kind of love you.
>>
>>32354731
>Don't be. My Lady, I shall bear this curse as you have, and turn it against the darkness.
>>
File: FEI YU XIANG.png (22 KB, 516x479)
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http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/32354710/
ARCHIVED SO THAT MISARCHIVER-SAN DOES'T ARCHIVE THIS AS WEEABOO FIGHTAN VAMPIRE KNIGHTS QUEST II: ELECTRIC WEEABO.

ALSO NEW STAT SHEET. ENJOY.
>>
>>32354862
I love you.
What do we need to do to get a seventh die in Chivalry?
>>
>>32354862
God damn.
Vampirism gave us a lot of bonuses didn't it.
Charisma, dexterity, stealth ...innuendo...
>>
>>32354926
Honestly, I feel like we should be taking penalties to Innuendo
>>
>>32355050
Well, that might come along with the zero intuition.
>>
>>32355097
We still roll 2 for Wisdom, I imagine
>>
>>32355169
Probably.
Or we can just decline to roll, and fail all innuendo checks in purpose.
>>
"Don't be, My Lady," you reassure her, brushing your free hand against her cheek and gently turning her silvery eyes to meet yours. You then clasp it around the hand that clasped your hand that was clasping her other hand. "I shall bear this curse as you have. The power it gives - My Lady, I swear to you upon my that I shall turn it against the darkness. Such is my duty as a servant of the Moon."

She doesn't respond, but the sadness in her eyes slowly evaporates. The two of you stay like that for the Sun and Sky only know how long, quite content to simply be in eachother's presence. After a while, when the sun is not quite so high in the sky, but not yet even near begun to set, the front door of Cheng'e's cabin opens, and a most delight smell of blood and raw venison wafts in upon the draft. The sound of shoes being shucked off a pair of feet follows, and an annoying person enters.

"Hey Queeny," the person calls from the cabin's foyer, footsteps moving towards the room. The two of you haven't really moved. Or noticed him. "Where do ya keep your skinning too-"

So naturally, he walks in on the two of you having a moment. Or hour. Hours? You're not entirely sure.

"Oh for the gods' bloody sake," Carver yells at the two of you. "Would the two of you just shag already and get it over with, yeesh! Oh wait, no, you're not bloody boyfriend and girlfriend there, are you, this is just a purely platonic staring at each other all 'likey-dikey'. Or this what happens when you Henanites finally end that bloody dance you do for gods know how long before you acknowledge your bloody feelings."

His face falls.

"I just walked in on the Henanite equivalent of a make out session, didn't I?"

>I beg your pardon, Sir Carver? I'm not familiar with foreign parlance.
>Sir Carver, stop saying such strange things. It's unbecoming of you.
>Sir Carver, apologize to Lady Cheng'e. You have sleighted her honor.
>[Write In]
>>
>>32355374
>I beg your pardon, Sir Carver? I'm not familiar with foreign parlance.
Make... Out?
But sir, we are inside, and nothing is being made.
>>
>>32355374
>Sir Carver, stop saying such strange things. It's unbecoming of you.
WE SHALL NEITHER CONFIRM NOR DENY
>>
Rolled 17

>>32355374
>>I beg your pardon, Sir Carver? I'm not familiar with foreign parlance.
What an odd fellow that one
>>
>>32355374
I'm just having fun imagining this tangle of hands.
>>
>>32354710
Cheng'e - Should she not live on the moon? Where is the rabbit HobbitQM?
>>
Rolled 1

>>32355536
Maximum handholding
>>
>>32354862
Did we always have 6 in Chivalry before the turning?
>>
>>32355582
Yes
>>32355581
>nat 1 on handholding
Did we get more lewd or less?
>>
>>32355582
Yeah, we were super chivalrous from the beginning
>>
>>32355602
We're holding our own hand.
>>
>>32355614
>>32355602
Perfect.

>>32355537
I hope we don't find out that she had a husband who is also an archer. An archer capable of shooting down 9 suns.
>>
>>32355374
>>I beg your pardon, Sir Carver? I'm not familiar with foreign parlance.
So Dense. So Good.

Also, hand holding for hours? My. How lewd. Or is this a vampire thing?
>>
>>32355582
OF COURSE. NOTHING LESS THAN MAXIMUM CHIVALRY.

>>32355537
THE PROBLEM WITH THIS IS THE MOON IN THIS SETTING IS LESS A PLANETOID AND MORE A PUNCTURE IN THE FABRIC OF THE UNIVERSE LETTING OUT SMALL AMOUNTS OF POSITIVE ENERGY. THE SUN IS ANOTHER SUCH PUNCTURE, ONLY MUCH LARGER, AND THE STARS ARE MUCH THE SAME, BUT EVEN MORE DISTANT.

SUNLIGHT IS LITERALLY HEALTHY FOR YOU, IN SETTING. THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS SUNBURN.
>>
>>32355631
>My hands are holding on their own!
>>
>>32355374
>I beg your pardon, Sir Carver? I'm not familiar with foreign parlance.
God, we're harem protag levels of dense.
>>
>>32355665
That is pretty awesome.

Literally healed by basal cell carcinoma.
>>
>>32355675
Eh? Nandatte?
>>32355665
>THE PROBLEM WITH THIS IS THE MOON IN THIS SETTING IS LESS A PLANETOID AND MORE A PUNCTURE IN THE FABRIC OF THE UNIVERSE LETTING OUT SMALL AMOUNTS OF POSITIVE ENERGY. THE SUN IS ANOTHER SUCH PUNCTURE, ONLY MUCH LARGER, AND THE STARS ARE MUCH THE SAME, BUT EVEN MORE DISTANT.
>SUNLIGHT IS LITERALLY HEALTHY FOR YOU, IN SETTING. THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS SUNBURN.
Everything you just said is the most glorious thing I've ever read
>>
>>32355675
New mission.
Gather harem.
Of sexy vampires.
>>
>>32355665
>SUNLIGHT IS LITERALLY HEALTHY FOR YOU, IN SETTING. THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS SUNBURN.
Neat
This applies for vampires too I guess?
Also glad to see you back Paladin, halfling quest was just as fun as I thought it would be
>>
>>32355665
Wait, if we are a worshipper of positive energy, then, could we not plan on ripping the canvas between us and the positive energy domain above us, to bath us all in positive energy?

Where is the knight oiling himself image when I need it.?
>>
>>32355725
I left for an afternoon and anons did well in that quest. I was impressed both with the story and how pulled through. I have high hopes.
>>
>>32355725
NO. MOSTLY BECAUSE YOU'RE UNDEAD. BUT SINCE YOU'RE NOT OF A DECAYED TEMPLATE, YOU DON'T CATCH FIRE LIKE MOST VAMPIRES DO. YOU ACTUALLY CAN GET SUNBURN BECAUSE YOU'RE A VAMPIRE, SO I SUPPOSE I STAND CORRECTED.

NOW HOLD PLEASE, THE PALADIN IS BEING VERY DENSE.

>Captcha: Considerable Chenglow

WHY YES, CHENG'E HAS LIT UP LIKE A LAVA LAMP, CAPTCHA!
>>
>>32355724
Oh hell no!
Its not chivalrous to discriminate like that
>>
>>32355665
So is there a Moon Goddess?
>>
>>32355665
Wooooo! New Paladin Quest!

And, I'm agreeing with the other anons. That is an awesome concept. And it explains why sunlight isn't good for vampires and other undead.
>>
>>32355773
Oh.
Shit.
Guys, what if we create a black hole?
>>
>>32355793
YES OF COURSE! THOUGH TECHNICALLY, SHE'S "JUST" THE SPIRIT OF THE MOON, JUST LIKE THERE ARE THE MOUNTAIN SPIRITS AND WHATNOT
>>
>>32355773
So, are we still hurt by any positive energy we channel? Can we even channel it?

Can we channel both positive and negative and become the Naginata of Day and Night?
>>
>>32355819
Did you ever read Fookin' Princesses? Because this is sorta like that: the quest. Which is awesome.
>>
File: SUDOKU COMMITTED.jpg (305 KB, 1871x661)
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>>32355882
I CONTRIBUTED EARLY ON TO THE FIRST THREAD, BUT DIDN'T CONTINUE. I WAS THE ONE WHO SPOKE OF COMMITTING SUDOKU.
>>
>>32355882
Wait, that is the one where we started with romancing the red dragon, is it not?

I missed it after the boat crash. Is it worth following still? What did I miss out on? Awesome?
>>
>>32355931
Haha. So that was you HobbitQM.

I am proud of /tg/.
>>
>>32355933
>I missed it after the boat crash. Is it worth following still? What did I miss out on? Awesome?
Oh yes, awesome happened
>>32355931
Our MC seems to be shaping up to be an exaggerated version of the main character in that story, so you might want to read it for ideas, or just fun.
>>
>>32355931
54?
Why 54?
>>
>>32356046
Never mind.
Got it.
>>
>>32355988
Will do anon. So many good threads. So little time to read them all.
>>
>>32355931
WHY ARE WE YELLING
>>
>>32356142
BECAUSE OF THE GREAT JUSTICE FLOWING THROUGH OUR VEINS.
>>
>>32356156
DOES THAT MEAN THAT WE DRINK JUSTICE AND NOT BLOOD?
>>
>>32356192
DOES THAT MEAN OUR LADY IS JUSTICE ITSELF?
>>
>>32356192
UM...
I DON'T KNOW.
YES?
MAYBE JUSTICE IS IN BLOOD.
>>
>>32354862
>Zero Intuition

AW YEAH BABY.

Densest Knight.
>>
>>32354710
Fuck yeah, it's Paladin Quest.
>>
>>32354862
I blame the innuendo boost on carver.
>>
"I beg your pardon, Sir Carver?" you ask, breaking your gaze with Cheng'e. For some reason, she is a rather bright beat red, sputterring incoherently at Carver's words. "I'm not entirely familiar with foreign parlance. Shag, you say - is the creation of carpetry a common passtime of friends and family in the Weimarland? I know the Haoman desert is famous for its beautiful carpets - do you hail from there?"

Carver smacks his hand against his head.

"H-h-h-He wasn't talking about c-c-carpets," Cheng'e declares rather forcefully; you can almost see steam rising out of her ears. "Th-that western barbarian was speaking of things that are shameful to speak of in polite company, and would do well to wash h-h-h-his tongue with ash and saltpeter."

"Barbarian, am I?" Carver asks, getting a tic in his eye. "I don't recall - which one lasted longer? Your Henanite Empire, which fell apart after what, six hundred, seven hundred years, or the Imperial Republic? Oh wait, we're celebrating our 2000th year next year, so, ah, never mind."

"HMPH," Cheng'e puffs her cheeks idignantly, turning away. "H-H-H-Henan came first, so even... even if we've had civil war for c-centuries, we've had civilization longer, mister b-b-barbarian."

"So if it was not carpets you spoke of, then what did you mean by 'shag'," you ask. Cheng'e makes and expression like a child would when they accidentally swallow a particularly large bug. Carver, on the other hand, gets a wide grin split across his face, making you feel much like the canary looking out at the cat.

"Well, you see..." he begins, a cackle in his voice. "When a man and a woman love each other very much... or find each other moderately attractive... or can't stand the sight of one another... or just had a few too many drinks at the bar, well, they get this tension in their chest."
>>
>>32356363
Cheng'e has slipped from your hands and made a valiant attempt to launch herself at the man. Unfortunately for her, Carver happened to be trained in the art of dodging bullets - a difficult task relying on knowing where an enemy is going to shoot more than speed - and a vampire moves significantly slower than a bullet. He steps out of the way, and continues.

"See, shagging a good way to relieve that tension," he explains. You nod for him to continue, wondering why Cheng'e seemed so upset at his explanation. "And it's a tension that needs to be relieved; if you don't, well, I've seen what happens. It can tear a group of friends apart, if they leave it bottled up, teach men and women an unhealthy hatred. Now I'm real good at readin' people, Herr Knight, and I see that tension building between you and Queeny here."

At this point he's struggling to keep Cheng'e from scratch at him, a laughter chiming in the back of his voice.

"You can see the results of it even now!" He tells you as he wrangles her hands away from his face, which is split with a wide grin. "I think it's really important the two of you shag, before this gets even worse, or spreads to you!"

>I see. But what does the act entail - carpetry?
>Lady Cheng'e, he may be right. Do you need to relieve this tension in the soul?
>Wait. Are you speaking of copulation? How shameful.
>[Write In]
>>
>>32356363
>"When a man and a woman love each other very much... or find each other moderately attractive... or can't stand the sight of one another... or just had a few too many drinks at the bar..."

Carver best sidekick of the year, all years of glorious Henan Empire
>>
>>32356344
Not that I don't like that joke, though I think we're overdoing it a little, but if this is anything like DnD Innuendo is used for any sort of hidden meanings in speech. Like the ability to hold a seemingly innocent conversation, or make a couple of simple everyday gestures and have someone be able to understand the meaning behind it.

Being as dense and straightforward as we are, it still wouldn't see much use, but there are uses other than being sexual.

>>32356385
>Lady Cheng'e, he may be right. Do you need to relieve this tension in the soul?

Gods, I love this quest.
>>
>>32356385
>Wait. Are you speaking of copulation? How shameful.
Hazukashi
That is an act to be done between a husband and a wife
Probably
>>
>>32356385
>Lady Cheng'e, he may be right. Do you need to relieve this tension in the soul?

And we propose that we go play in the garden to relieve this tension. Or something completely innocent.
>>
>>32356385
Tension in the soul? Ah I see now, we absolutely MUST "shag", my lady. Meditation is a sacred and communal event.
>>
>>32356466
This. Courtly romance hoooo
>>
>>32356469
I like it.

I am for this anon.
>>
>>32356385
>>Lady Cheng'e, he may be right. Do you need to relieve this tension in the soul?
I don't know when this joke will get old, but it isn't now.
>>
>>32356385
>Lady Cheng'e, he may be right. Do you need to relieve this tension in the soul?
>But what does the act entail - carpetry?
>>
>>32356438
And his mistresses. What, we're a decedent empire in the middle of a 2000 year civil war
>>
So, in the transition to Vampire, we got all the racial bonuses and penalties. Did we lose any of our human ones? Other than the Constitution stat entirely anyway.
>>
>>32356505
Vampires have instant regen, right?
>>
>>32356385
>>Wait. Are you speaking of copulation? How shameful.
>>
>>32356510
We split not Dio in half and he just stood there and called us a punk bitch, he wasn't even a hungering prince like we are
>>
>>32356385
>>Lady Cheng'e, he may be right. Do you need to relieve this tension in the soul?
>>
>>32356385
>"I see. But what does the act entail - carpetry? Perhaps you should show us how to 'shag' properly."
captcha
>idlytoo innocent
hue
>>
>>32356397
CARVER IS A NATIVE OF CÉBAILE, THE CAPITAL OF THE EMERALD ISLANDS.

TO PUT THAT IN PERSPECTIVE, HEILYN IS RELATIVELY MILD MANNERED FOR THE YOUTH OF THE EMERALD ISLANDS, AND SHE LIVES IN THE HEART OF DEBAUCHERY. MOST OF THEM MELLOW OUT WITH AGE; THOSE THAT DON'T BECOME PIRATES.

>>32356495
NOT QUITE. MORE "THE EMPIRE COLLAPSED LIKE ROME, AND THE ITALIAN CITY-STATES HAVE BEEN PLAYING EVERYONE ELSE OFF EACH OTHER FOR THE PAST FEW CENTURIES. EXCEPT THEY'RE ASIAN.

>>32356531
NO, HE WASN'T. BUT HE WASN'T A RUN OF THE MILL VAMPIRE EITHER.
>>
>>32356596
So our dear little halfling is actually a reserved and proper young lady in her world.
>>
>>32356596
>HEILYN IS RELATIVELY MILD MANNERED

Huh. Well that's an interesting look into life there. Might have been a decent idea to mention that first thread, you know, point out that she lives in whats essentially Slaanesh's favorite country.
>>
>>32354710
>Paladin
>OP's pic is Rance with a glaive.
>>
>>32356670
Well if the direction we're going in now continues we'll be doing a full blown Rance imitation by thread 5.
>>
>>32356596
That doesn't explain how decadent the courts are.
>>
>>32356810
We are actually going to be the opposite from a sexual perspective.
>>
>>32356835
THE FLOATING CITY SORT OF EXPLODED ABOUT A THOUSAND YEARS AGO AND IS NOW AT THE BOTTOM OF THE LAKE. THE ISLE OF DAWN IS A CHEERFUL AND SUNNY PLACE TO GO THAT EVERYONE WANTS TO TAKE THEIR ADORABLE DAUGHTERS TO TOTALLY NOT BE EATEN BY SHOGGOTHS.

OTHER THAN THAT, NOT SURE WHAT COURTS YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT. THE FIVE CITY STATES ARE NICE, BUT THEY'RE NO LIETENS OR EVEN HAOMA (Imperial Republican Elf City).
>>
>>32356596
In the Emerald Islands, what happens to women who get pregnant when not in a stable relationship?

Are children the father's responsibility to raise?
Does the child go to a huge church-like or warlike organization to be raised?
Does the child starve?
Is there some type of ancient child support payments?

I hope there's no ancient child support payments. At least not without some magical Detect Bloodline.

Though that could be a plot device. If magical aptitude is hereditary, and a Queen has a child that doesn't share the father's magical aptitudes, then awww shit.
>>
>>32356920
So the empire is elven?
>>
>>32356995
Certainly would have solved half the problems in GoT. Honestly, I can't imagine there wouldn't be some way to magically check the parentage of a kid.

which hityllp
>>
>>32356995
May be all the abandoned kids get taken in by pirates and became the next generation of sailors!
>>
>>32357077
That could be interesting. As Pirate Queen we'd also, by proxy, end up running the national orphanage!
>>
>>32357056
Could go the Fantasy EU route and make it illegal magic.
>>
>>32357101
Then we retire to be the best nanny in town.
>>
>>32356995
Where did this question even come from?
>>
>>32357128
Where did you even come from?
>>
>>32357010
The Imperial Republic (which is to the south and West) is integrated between Elves, Dark Elves, Gatorans, Humans, Dwarves, Halflings, and Gnomes. The first stable Emperor was a Halfling woman, Ruari Culaigne, infamous in middle east for the sacking of Bab-Ilu in a preemptive attack on the Orcine homelands. The current Dynasty is human, though both sort of elves have had their turn.

>>32356995
1) Clerics of Helen have long held it to be their duty to make sure children are not born out of Wedlock. While there are no Parentage Checking Spells, the Clerics provide women with infertility spells that shut down their reproductive cycle. Most do this until they want to have kids because it gets rid of the menstrual cycle. Even when it's dispelled, it takes a month to get going again.

Magical aptitude is Scholarly. Most schools teach children basic cantrips light making light or cleaning themselves off.
>>
>>32357142
>While there are no Parentage Checking Spells
Bah, why can't magic solve everything.

>infertility spells
That's pretty fucking interesting. Would these be masscast over an area in warfare, to deny the enemy the ability to replace their numbers, and eventually win the war after 20 years of attrition?
>>
>>32357249
No, it's what rapists cast.
>>
>>32357249
I would think that they dispel it before it came to that.
>>
"Lady Cheng'e, please calm yourself," you politely ask the Hungering Queen, even as she makes an attempt to claw the gunslinger's eyes out. It's probably just a mock attempt, given what you saw from Alfons the other day, and you'd rather not see this tension work her up into making a serious try. "Perhaps Sir Carver is correct - perhaps this tension that he says has built up between us is getting to your head and clouding thought. So very well, we must shag to keep peace within this household, then we shall."

Cheng'e erupts into a very bright flair of red, before it drains out into a cold and deathly pale. She backs away from the half elf, and takes a seat up her chair, her hands returning to the towels. Glaring at the gunslinger, she speaks.

"I think I'm beginning to hate you," she declares.

"See," you plead with her, "this is most unlike you. Let us get this act out of the way, so that we may proceed. Now, Sir Carver, just what does the act of 'Shagging' entail?"

"Oh it's very simple," Carver cheerfully quips. "What you do is you take your sword and slam it into her sheath for as long as your stamina'll let you do that. Some folk, it just takes a few minutes till their out and spent. Other folk, it can go on for hours and hours and when you're finally done no one involved will want to walk for a while."

"But I don't have a swor-" Your brain finally manages to click on to what the foreign man was getting at. A look of horror must have washed over your face, because Carver burst out laughing while Cheng'e glared at him. "So shagging is copulation. She's right, that's shameful to speak of; you should wash your mouth of it's foulness."

He rolls his eyes. You turn to the Hungering Queen.

"My Lady, I must apologize for my ignorance," you say, bowing your head in shame. "It has caused you severe discomfort, and I have with my proposition sleighted your honor. I beg your forgiveness."
>>
>>32357351

"It's not you who needs m-my forgiveness, Fei Yu," she says, smiling at you and lifting your head. "It's the barbarian who has offended m-me. Though I-I fear that he is not very repentent."

>Sir Carver, please apologizes to Lady Cheng'e.
>I would ask you forgive him, My Lady. He knows not our manners, his offense is not his fault.
>Indeed. But there are other matters to attend to, are there not?
>[Write In]
>>
>>32357351
Carvers sides are forever in orbit around us
>>
>>32357372
>>I would ask you forgive him, My Lady. He knows not our manners, his offense is not his fault.
>>
>>32357372
>I would ask you forgive him, My Lady. He knows not our manners, his offense is not his fault.
CULTURAL AWARENESS
>>
>>32357372
>I would ask you forgive him, My Lady. He knows not our manners, his offense is not his fault.
>>
>>32357300
This setting has prestidigitation, right?
Prestidigitation would be more use to a rapist than (in)fertility spells. As well would Bigby's hand spells.
>>
>>32357372
>Sir Carver, please apologizes to Lady Cheng'e.
>>
>>32357372
>Sir Carver, please apologizes to Lady Cheng'e.

He knew -exactly- what he was doing.
>>
>>32357372
>>Sir Carver, please apologizes to Lady Cheng'e.

>that entire scene
ZERO INTUITION HO!
>>
>>32357372
>Sir Carver, please apologizes to Lady Cheng'e.
Okay Carver, time to apologize
>>
>>32357249
One of the biggest differences in the cultures of the former Henanite lands and the Imperial Republis is the availability of the spell. It's a gift from Helen, or so her Priestesses claim, and while it does effective require the Priestess to Lay Hands upon the subject of the spell, no one outside her order is gifted with it. In the Henanite lands, receiving the spell is seen as shameful, for the Helenic missions originally started by offering their services to Geishas.

So while the Weimarlands are fairly blaise about sex and gender, the Henanites are fairly conservative. There have been female rulers in Henan and the states it broke into, but nowhere near the number of women in power as there are in the Weimarlands. To put it in perspective - all the rulers of the City States that claim descendence from Henan are male, where as the current Emperor, her right hand, and the ruler of the largest city in the Imperial Republic are all women.

More importantly, no one makes a big deal out of it.

The Middle Eastern area has a bit more access than the Far East due to proximit than the Far East, so there are no shameful connotations of receiving the spell. Infact, the spell is the only reason why worship of Helen is permitted in the region - they are otherwise rathr militant in their religious beliefs.

It should be noted that this does not stop an orc from making Half Orcs with humanoids, male or female - their reproductive systems work differently, and only require that they consume the flesh of their "mate". Half Orcs, though, work either way, and have actual sexual dimorphism (technically speaking, despite being hulking masses of teeth and muscle, Orcs are all female). Most only use their "humanoid" means of production, though, as about half of The Way involves stamping out the Orcine Instincts of Half Orcs.
>>
>>32356920
>OTHER THAN THAT, NOT SURE WHAT COURTS YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT. THE FIVE CITY STATES ARE NICE, BUT THEY'RE NO LIETENS OR EVEN HAOMA (Imperial Republican Elf City).
Yeah see, I was making a joke about how unlike those barbarians we know that sex is only supposed to be between a man and his wife... and his mistresses. I mean, we are civilized.

Think of it like how the bible belt seems to have more porn shops then the rest of America combined.
>>
>>32357592
Well as long as Family is supported then it matters not if your ruler is male or female. Family is the most important thing.
>>
>>32357372
>Indeed. But there are other matters to attend to, are there not?

I think the joke has played its course.
>>
>>32357351
>Indeed. But there are other matters to attend to, are there not?

Alright, we can come back to this another time. Let's get that plot ball rolling.
>>
>>32357637
>Think of it like how the bible belt seems to have more porn shops then the rest of America combined.
My /pol/ senses are tingling.
>>
>>32357592
So far east - Henan
Middle east - ?
West - Emerald Islands
>>
>>32357717
Its kinda true though. Possibly because zoning laws are much more lax.
>>
>>32357768
Really?

I imagine the town would be eager to chase them out.
>>
>>32357767
Far East - Henan
Middle East - Rus.
North of Rus - Darkhan/The Craneshead (Mongolian Elves).
West - Weimar. Emerald Islands are a part of them, off the south east coast.
>>
>>32357790
Seriously. Remember going to Huston and seeing about six porn shops on a major road.
>>
>>32357819
Ahhh thanks good QM.

>>32357825
I can somehow see it.
>>
>>32357768
Could be any number of reasons.
My best bet is either the large african population of the area have different purchasing habits, or the deeply religious being more interested in porn than the more secular.
>>
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>mfw just in time for Paladin Quest

>>32357372
>I would ask you forgive him, My Lady. He knows not our manners, his offense is not his fault.
>>
"Carver, your jest was most shameful, and sleighted the honor of Lady Cheng'e," you inform the Half Elf. He rolls his eyes and shakes his head in exasperation, at which your gaze upon him hardens. "I would ask that you apologize to her. Immediately."

"Fine, fine, don't eat me, I get it," he says, throwing up his hands. Both you and Cheng'e glare at him at the comment about eating him. "I'm sorry! I poked too much fun at your sensibilities, your ignorance, and apparently your condition too. Hector and Helen, I knew I got me arse assigned to a land of sticks in the mud, but this bakes the cake then takes it. It's called having a sense of humor - or are jokes like that too overt for your tastes?

Cheng'e lets a fan drop from her sleeves, a simple cantrip most anyone knows to hide small things in the folds of space they make around themselves. She flips it open and starts fanning herself with vigor, as if it were a hot summers' evening. A smile plays upon her face, and she drops her voice a practiced octave.

"Ufu~!" She laughs haughtily, her stutter vanishing. "You shall learn well the tastes of Henan and her children, o Lion of the West. They are sweet and subtle as the winds caress, and only the most refined tongue can experience them fully."

You give as much as laugh as is appropriate. True, it was a crude joke upon the poor foreigner, but the reference to Lady Xaolin of Muon Dao's epic, the Trials of Paon Jin Wo made it appropriate for polite conversation. However racy it might have been. The joke, you see, was a direct quote from the passage where Xaolin tempts the young Paon Jin to lie with her. The tastes referring to acts best not mentioned in polite conversation - he refused, of course, though not until after her soliloquoy on the pleasures of the pillow, one of the most lurid descriptions of such acts ever put to pen.
>>
>>32358243

"What," the ignorant half elf deadpans, noting the laughter in Cheng'e's eyes, but not understanding the reason behind it. "No, seriously, what?"

"I believe, good sir, that we are even," you tell him, "'for though you have learned much of this land in it's travels, you have yet to taste its sweetest fruits.'" Cheng'e's eyes light happily at that. "Forgive me. I have done to you as you have done to me - I would recommend you read the works of Muon Dao, if you wish to understand."

"I'll put it on the list," Carver drawls, taking out a notebook from one of his many pouches and pulling forth... not a quill or stick of charcoal, but some sort of tube with ink in it. A clever contraption.

>Ask him about this list of his.
>Ask Cheng'e if she ever had the pleasure to meet Muon Dao.
>You're feeling able now. See what work there is to be done.
>[Write In]
>>
>>32358267
>You're feeling able now. See what work there is to be done.
We've sat around long enough
>>
>>32358267
>You're feeling able now. See what work there is to be done.

I'm sure there's something to do around here. what with the recently disposed vampire guy and our dead horse that needs retrieving.
>>
>>32358267
>>You're feeling able now. See what work there is to be done.
back to work gents
>>
>>32358267
>You're feeling able now. See what work there is to be done.
>>
>>32358267
>You're feeling able now. See what work there is to be done.
Well these social links are all fun and all but we got undead, monsters, bandits, heretics, and BBEGs to smite
>>
>>32358267
>Ask Cheng'e if she ever had the pleasure to meet Muon Dao. While walking to bury our horse.
>>
>>32358267
>subtle/crude Henan joke
Dude, you're too cool.

>You're feeling able now. See what work there is to be done
No rest for the RIGHTEOUS
>>
>>32358543
we can sleep when we're dead
....oh wait
>>
>>32358686
Hey, we probably don't need sleep anymore. We can be righteous 24/7!

Really need to ask Cheng'e what all has changed with our transformation.
>>
>>32358726
My guess is
1) We're even STRONKER then before
2) Crave blood
3) Supernatural attraction/ devotion to our sire
>>
>>32358543
Ain't no rest for the RIGHTEOUS
Money don't grow on SIN
I've got JUSTICE to pay
I've got LAW to feed
And ain't NO VILLAIN in this world that's free.
>>
>>32358726
>Hey, we probably don't need sleep anymore. We can be righteous 24/7!

I'm still a little hazy on the Vampiric aversion to sunlight in this setting, is it only the Hungering Kings and Queens or do the Princes enjoy the immunity as well?
>>
>>32358782
We've got some, since we stuck our hand in the sunlight at the end of last thread.
>>
>>32358782
OP said we can get a sunburn.
That's about it.
>>
>>32358781
Yes. Yes. Yes.
>>
>>32358781
No I can't slow down
I can't hold back
Though you know I wish I could
No there ain't no rest for the RIGHTEOUS
Until we close our eyes for good
>>
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>>32358781
I can't hold back
I can't slow down
I don't even wish that I could.

Yeah, there ain't no rest for the RIGHTEOUS
Until we close our eyes for good.
>>
>>32358815
>sunburn

Fuck man, I don't know, Is our PALLY-BRO ballsy enough to brave that risk?
>>
>>32358823
I was walkin' down the street
When out the corner of my helm
I saw a beautiful young maiden approaching me

She said I never seen a knight
Who looked so all chivalrous
Oh could you use a little RIGHTEOUSNESS

And if you SLAY THE RIGHT EVIL
Your country will be nice
You can go right along on your wat

I said you're such a sweet young thing
Why would he do this to your town
>>
>>32358857
We need to find sunscreen potion
>>
>>32358857
We'll have to be careful during sunny days though, people don't have sunscreen here, since only undead get hurt by the sun.
>>
>>32358917
As long as we wear armor we should be fine.

That actually reminds me of a book I read as a kid.
Some kid got turned into a vampire, and he had to slather on sunscreen, and cover every inch of his skin in like 3 layers of clothing.
>>
>>32358967
Was that the Rehabilitating Vampire support group?
>>
>>32359015
I don't think so.
I'm not even slightly certain, though.
>>
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"Well, those tasty animals ain't gonna skin themselves," Carver declares as he shuts his notebook. "You wanna help out, Queeny? I know a thing or three about taxidermy, and I'd bet a deer's head would look mighty fine over your mantle. Or how about you, Moon Man, cloaks for the Orphanages and all that jazz. Not that they'd need them, this far north - I'm amazed it's so damned temperate."

"No," Cheng'e says, placing another towel on your forehead. "He still needs to rest, and I need to watch, and ensure the process is complete. In the days of Henan, we waited a week and a day as the Princes slept in their sarcophagi. He has had but two."

"Yes," you say, giving her a look. You're conflicted on the matter yourself - she knows more of this than you do, and you know that you should listen to her. But another part of you reminds you that she is a woman, and it is in a woman's nature to nurture and worry over those in her care. An important role, there can be no doubt, but... "I've spent two days at sleep all ready, and I am feeling well and able. You were all mighty wizards in those days, but I am tied still too the Moon; I think my connection with her allowed me to bear it better."

You push yourself up from the bed, struggling to rise. You muscles ache and groan, but you've had practice ignoring such little pains. You can see the worry play up Cheng'e's face as you shuffle out of bed, but it fades as you pull yourself up to your full height. It hurts to do so, but you don't let it show upon your face, and that seems to reassure her. You smile at her, and she slowly, uncertainly returns it.

"See," you declare, clasping her hand in yours, "I'm fine. There's no need to worry."

She opens her mouth, but Carver speaks first.
>>
>>32359275

"Well alright then, mate," he says, clapping you on the shoulder. You ignore the unwanted contact, reminding yourself that he is foreign, and that they are much more blase about touching one another in the West. "You know how to skin a beast, or cut 'em up? Don't worry if you don't, I can show you. It's actually real easy, the first thing you've gotta do is-"

"I have other business to attend to," you tell him, as you force yourself to walk out of the door. "My steed fell to the zombies that plagued the tunnel into town, and the cemetery needs to be rededicated to the Lake Spirit, and the bodies once again interned. Will you join me, My Lady?"

"I-I would like to," she replied, "The Mountain has been bothered by his Love's distress... But Carver is a guest, and someone needs to cook what he has brought us."

"Don't worry about it," Carver says. "As long as you're alright with me house sitting for a bit, I can take care of all that jazz. I found some herbs and spices while I was hunting, too, so if you two don't mind, I can cook you up something Alamani style. Besides, you're the local priestess right? It'd be wrong to keep you from doing right by your flock."

"They're not..." she starts, before sighing. "Our faith is not like that, Sir Carver, but I understand your meaning; it is my duty, and if you don't mind doing the woman's work, then by all means."

Carver rolls his eyes. He mouths the words "women's work," seemingly amused by the concept.

"Yeah sure, I don't mind at all," he says. "You two do what you need to do, I'll have some steaks ready when you get back!"

>The Spirit of the Lake is weeping. The rededication takes priority.
>Brightstar has gone unburied for too long. Bring his body back, and give him a proper Funeral.
>[Write In]

>Gonna go see Gojira with my mates. Pausing the quest for now, we'll resume when I get back.
>>
>>32359299
>Brightstar has gone unburied for too long. Bring his body back, and give him a proper Funeral.
>>
>>32359299
>The Spirit of the Lake is weeping. The rededication takes priority.

Our steed would understand the importance of such an act.
>>
>>32359299
>The Spirit of the Lake is weeping. The rededication takes priority.

Our steed is as noble as we are, and thus may bear the burden of waiting just a bit longer. Please forgive us, dear friend, this indignity, for someone suffers.
>>
>>32359299
>Brightstar has gone unburied for too long. Bring his body back, and give him a proper Funeral.

It was our arrogance that led to his demise, we have already put it off too long.
>>
>>32359299
>The Spirit of the Lake is weeping. The rededication takes priority.
>>
>>32359299
>>The Spirit of the Lake is weeping. The rededication takes priority.
Brightstar has five more days before that cantrip we cast fades, let's work on the graveyard first
>>
>>32359425
Arrogance nothing, we were cutting off the head of the serpent, and he needed to be put down before his knife...bone...whatever seriously injured us.
>>
>>32359299
Brightstar first. Im worried itll rise as a zombie
>>
>>32359474
We charged ahead leaving our steed and friend undefended against the horde.
>>
>>32359275
>But another part of you reminds you that she is a woman, and it is in a woman's nature to nurture and worry over those in her care.
That only applies to Children, doesn't it?

>>32359299
>The Spirit of the Lake is weeping. The rededication takes priority.
>>
>>32359688
>That only applies to Children, doesn't it?
Everyone is a child to a Hungry Queen
>>
>>32359688
To her we are a child.
She's been alive for thousands of years, and we're somewhere around 20
>>
>>32359688
She is over two thousand years old. Everyone is a child to her. Especially her spawn (Us).
>>
>>32359917
Does that mean that getting lewd with her would be incest?
>>
>>32360074
Well, we're more her adopted son than anything.
And that, anon, is my fetish.
>>
>>32360074
>>32360096
I think it's like donating an organ to an adopted child. So its borderline incest.

Which makes it borderline my fetish, and thus, close enough.
>>
Oh, by the way QM! We got Halfling Quest 2 to gold like you asked!
>>
>>32360592
*dwarf cocksucker quest.

It's like you weren't even there.
>>
>>32360646
Look, if I want to call it by the actual name of the thread that's my business.
Definitely wasn't because it was shorter or anything.
>>
>>32359299
>>Brightstar has gone unburied for too long. Bring his body back, and give him a proper Funeral.

Also fuck yes Gojira. OP has best taste.
>>
>>32360774
You know, I forgot he said that he'd be leaving to go see it and have been anxiously awaiting an update for the past half-hour.
>>
>>32360811
I was wondering how many people would be doing that.
>>
>>32361512
I'm shitposting in agreement.
>>
>>32361512
In the interest of figuring out when he'll be back, I present some basic numbers:

Last Post: 7:55 pm EST
Godzilla Run Time: 2 hours, 3 minutes
Estimated drive to and from theater: Let's say 30 minutes round trip as a guess.
Assuming he wanted to arrive 10 ish minutes before the movie ...

My best guess he'll be back around 10:45 pm EST.

Good thing there are other quests to keep me entertained.
>>
>>32361710
Matter of curiosity, which ones are you in right now?
>>
>>32361862
Hive Queen, Garden, and Bionicle. Still wondering why no Harem Protag, and where the hell Gobble disappeared to though.
>>
>>32361955
Also Golem, cause that just popped up.
>>
>>32361955
I'm in golem, and yeah, did guide say when his next thread would be?
>>
>>32361955
>and where the hell Gobble disappeared to though.
gobble is kill
>>
>>32361955
I miss Gobble
>>
>>32362121
Just checked the archive, said he didn't know and would let us know via twitter. Sadly that hasn't happened yet.
>>
>>32361710
Just got out, dropping by Wendy's and then heading back. Lost my trip because I'm phoneposting.
>>
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>>32363220
>Just got out, dropping by Wendy's and then heading back. Lost my trip because I'm phoneposting.

>mfw

was it awesome, or was it AWESOME?
>>
>>32363220
Alright, decent estimate on my part then. Can't wait!
>>
>>32363220
Wendy's sounds good, bring me some too please.
>>
>>32363747
Yeah, you'd better share.
>>
>>32363799
You got cash for that, nigger?
>>
>>32363840
Take it. Take it all!
>>
>>32363321
Alright, so I was at least an hour off. Maybe I underestimated the drive to the theater. Or one of the other variables I was just guessing.
>>
>>32364261
Writing as we speak.
>>
>>32364261
For being one hour off you lose one year off your life.
>>
>>32364280
Celebrations!
>>
>>32364298
I agree. It shall be done, you shall not be forgiven.
>>
>>32364362
I nether need nor want your forgiveness, only your excellence.
>>
>>32364460
How can I give my excellence to a person who can not figure out when an anonymous person on the internet will return from watching a movie?
>>
>>32364523
Derp. 4460 was me, I misread what 4362 said and though he was mad. welp time to commit sudoku
>>
>>32364362
>>32364523
Were me, I was just messing around. No body is mad EVERYBODY CALM DOWN

GREAT NOW MY JUSTICE IS FLOWING
>>
The bodies of the Townsfolk, and their rededication to the Lake that brought the their lives come first. It is a thankless, bitter task the two of you go about. Without a master to guide them, when Carver vanished and dissappeared into the wood, the mindless undead turned upon one another in a ravenous frenzy, devouring flesh and bone alike. Cheng'e says the words as you bury what you can - a consecrated mass grave is better than no grave at all, and better by far than dug up and desecrated.

In the end there are too many, too rotten and decayed by battle and necrotic tain to recognize. You search the Castle for the Town's Record while Cheng'e prays to the Mountain to send her a stone to be shaped for a memorial. You find it within the old lord's office, buried under bloodied paperwork and journals Alfons kept in his mother tongue. You can neither speak nor read it, but perhaps Cheng'e or Carver might be able; or someone back at the Monestary.

When you return to the graveyard from your trip into the castle, you nearly panic. A stone rolling down from the mountain top, at least the size of a carriage, looked as though it were about to crush Cheng'e as she knelt in prayer, her eyes closed. It stops at her feet, and she looks at you with a very slight smile. You suppose this was the spirit, answering her prayer.

"That's quite the stone, My Lady," you comment, approaching her as she rises from her knees. "I shall get Carver, but... I am not sure if between the two of us we will be able to move it into place. It must be at least two tons, perhaps three, maybe even four. Even if all three of us pushed upon it, I do not think it will move."
>>
>>32364789
"Y-you've much to learn, l-little princeling, of what it is you have become," She says, her fan hiding a wide and playful smile dancing upon her mouth. "Th-Though the hunger pangs will never seek to h-haunt u-us, this c-curse of o-ours is not without it's benefits. Th-Though the price is f-far from worth it, Father Earth did give u-us a few gifts to ease o-our struggle."

She waves the fan in one hand, and with each flap the stone slowly rises, until it is at least a foot off of the ground. She walks to the graveyard, and it follows behind her like a puppy trailing its mother, and when it is at last in position, she lets it down gently. Though she stays upright, she visibly wavers as she puts it down, and almost leans upon the stone.

"It... it has been quite some time since I-I have had the need to lift something th-that heavy," she says through panting breaths that are fairly deliberately not gasps. "L-Like any muscle, i-it will wax and wane with practice. I-I have had much, in m-my time; I-I do not expect y-you to be ready for something like this in m-many years."

You nod. "I've located the town record; will you need my assistance putting the names upon the stone?"

"Th-There is no need," she tells you, and allready her hands and spells are at work, shaping the stone into a memorial, listing all the town's residents since it's foundation. "I-I should be done sh-shortly."

"Then, there is something I must do. Tell Carver I may be late for his cooking."

You depart, to bury your steed in the Light of the Moon. She is not full this day, she waxes, coming into her glory and greatness but not yet fully there. You find a hill upon which to bury Brightstar, and a good stone to mark his passing. With hammer and chisel you mark his name in the old characters, the year he died, and what Lord reigned over these lands when he did. On the crown, you mark the phase of the moon, as best you can with what skill you have.
>>
>>32364460
>>32364523
>>32364607
>>32364703
I'm >>32361710
>>32363321
and >>32364261

and I have no idea what your talking about.
>>
>>32364806


You return to the cabin in better spirits than when you left it, for your steed rides now among the stars.

>Share Alfons' journals with both Carver and Cheng'e.
>Share Alfons' journals with Carver. Lady Cheng'e need not worry about them.
>Share Alfons' journals with Cheng'e. You don't fully trust Sir Carver.
>Keep them hidden, for the eyes of your Monestary only.
>[Write In]
>>
>>32364829
>Share Alfons' journals with both Carver and Cheng'e.

And we're back!
>>
>>32364829
>Share Alfons' journals with both Carver and Cheng'e
>>
>>32364829
>Share Alfons' journals with both Carver and Cheng'e.

also
>it follows behind her like a puppy trailing its mother
If that rock acted anything like any puppy I've ever seen, Cheng'e would be flatter than a pancake right now
>>
>>32364829
>Share Alfons' journals with Cheng'e. You don't fully trust Sir Carver.
>>
>>32364829
>Share Alfons' journals with both Carver and Cheng'e.
>>
>>32364829
>Share Alfons' journals with Cheng'e. You don't fully trust Sir Carver.

Normally I'd say give a fellow the benefit of the doubt, and he did lend us aid against the undead horde. Still, there could be something in there emberassing/sensitive to Cheng'e.
>>
>>32364899
You must be a lab person
>>
>>32364829
>>Share Alfons' journals with both Carver and Cheng'e.
>>
did QM fall asleep?
>>
>>32365250
Yes, very.
>>
>>32365629
Let him eat his Wendy's in peace, man.
>>
>>32365629
Might just be basking in Gojira afterglow
>>
>>32365629
Currently writing, it's another long one because Carver and Cheng'e got into a fight over the kitchen. Well, less a fight, and more Cheng'e forcing him out and likely never allowing him near the stove again.

He's a better cook than her.
>>
>>32364829
>Share Alfons' journals with Cheng'e. You don't fully trust Sir Carver.

Not that he isn't a bro or anything, but what exactly is a foreign military operative doing here? I'm all for sharing after we know. We at least know Cheng'e's story.
>>
>>32365641
Myself as well
>>
>>32365811
I can tell, you're a good person.
>>
The vennison steaks are, of course, delicious. You suppose that cooking is not as feminine a passtime over in the Weimarlands as it is here; most Henanite men would not know what to do if they found themselves in one. It is a mysterious domain where Women rule the day, and only the Lord's tasters may tread without incurring their wrath. So you can quite honestly say that you have not the foggiest clue what the man did to make something as simple as meat and potatoes delicious.

Cheng'e has a very odd look upon her face, as if she were upset with the meal placed before her. She pokes the meat suspiciously with her knife and fork, as if she were expecting some unpleasant creature to pop and disgust her. When nothing does, she cuts into it, slicing a small piece off and nibbles at the end, as if testing rancid smelling beef. Her frown deepens as she chews the whole thing down - is that jealousy that crosses her face?

"H-He's a better cook than m-me..." she mutters to herself, as if she were a samurai admitted cowardice in battle.

"Well, my father was a gourmet to the myriad Dukes of Cebaile," he says, clearing the table and getting to work cleaning the dishes. This brings a twitch to Cheng'e's eyes, and with a huff she goes to join him. "His father was much the same, and his Mother before that - I think it goes back to when the Eagens held the throne at Lietens, or maybe even earlier. What's the sayin': Dynasties come and go, but the bureaucrats remain? Anyhow, I was the second kid in the family, so I was never gonna take over from him, but I grew up in the castle kitchens, and you pick up a few things on the way, you know?"

"I can't possibly imagine," she responds far to sweetly - and the dishes start floating away from his hands and into hers, as she calmly usurps the sink from him. "A man has no place in a kitchen. That's a tried and true maxim, a tradition that has held for centuries."
>>
>>32366050
Carver politely backs off from the suddenly rather territorial vampire. You don't think she's going to be letting him near the stove tops ever again, if the way the now floating knives are so subtly pointing at him is any indication. The gunslinger gives you a somewhat worried look.

"This a cultural thing?" he asks no one in particular, eying the floating knives warily. "Because if it's a cultural thing, then I am very sorry for offending you Miss Queeny, and I humbly beg your forgiveness. I am not against prostrating myself before you, if you feel the offense is of that magnitude."

"Oh, there is no need," she informs him with a warm smile. "Your meal was wonderful."

Quite notably, the knives do not change their position.

"Sooooooo..." he says in a long, drawn out breath. "How bad was it out there. I didn't get much of a look from the treeline that night."

"About as bad as you would expect, given the circumstances," you reply, reaching into your bag. "Though I think I may have found some answers, though they're not in a language I'm familiar with. I expect it might be in your tongue, Sir Carver, or another one spoken in your Republic. Would either of you like to take a look at them?"

"Sure, lemme see," Carver says, putting his hand out in askance. You hand him one of them, and he opens it to a random middle page. He spends about thirty seconds reading through it, and then snaps it shut handing it back. "Um. Yeah, trust me when I say that even if that's a code, I don't think either of you want to read that. Given your, ah, delicate sensibilities. It's rather graphic, and it invo-"
>>
>>32366080

"Let me see," Cheng'e snaps, clearly still a bit miffed from the cooking thing. She takes the same book, opens it to a middle page, a spends a few seconds more than he did reading through it before turning a bright, beat red. "Th-th-th-that man... I-I-I feel violated. Please excuse me; the urge to visit the Mountain's hotsprings has come upon me. The scalding ones. And I would rather not be disturbed."

>Dare I ask what was written there, Sir Carver?
>Go after Cheng'e. The expression that came across her face was... troubled, to say the least.
>[Write In]
>>
>>32366100
The lady asked not to be disturbed. I say we talk it over with Sir Carver, to see if any useful tactical information can be acquired. Make it clear that we are, of course, available to the lady if needed.
>>
>>32366100
>>Dare I ask what was written there, Sir Carver?
>>
>>32366100
>Dare I ask what was written there, Sir Carver?
Not a good idea to follow a women to a bath, right? also EXTREAMY CURIOUS about what was written now. Please let us know PQM.
>>
>>32366100
>>Go after Cheng'e. The expression that came across her face was... troubled, to say the least.
>>
>>32366100
>Dare I ask what was written there, Sir Carver?
>>
>>32366100
>Dare I ask what was written there, Sir Carver?

Oh this should be good.
>>
>>32366100
>Go after Cheng'e. The expression that came across her face was... troubled, to say the least.
Surprise event hoooooo!
Bad End hoooooooo!
>>
>>32366217
Probably a fanfic starting him and Cheng.
>>
>>32366100
>Go after Cheng'e. The expression that came across her face was... troubled, to say the least.

Note for later, much late:
Something to the effect of saying that if Carter is a better cook that Cheng'e that she might learn from him in order to spread his skill beyond his life time.
>>
>>32366100
Both.
>>
>>32366100
>Dare I ask what was written there, Sir Carver?

First we get the info, and then we go after the distressed damsel. Having the damsel explain distressing information would be a burden upon her. That isn't chivalrous at all. Especially when someone else is available to explain it in her stead. Afterwards its full chivalry ahead.
>>
"Dare I ask what was written there, Sir Carver?" you ask the man, eying Cheng'e as she flees up the mountain side with remarkable alacrity. "Lady Cheng'e seemed most distressed by the contents of that journal - did Alfons betray her trust in some manner, or was it a matter somewhat more... lurid?"

Carver gives a hollow laugh.

"Heh. You could say that," he says, picking up the book that Cheng'e dropped. "Lurid doesn't really begin to cover it. The man had a sick and twisted mind even before he became a vampire, or at least didn't mind if people who read these thought that way. It's filled with poems and prose, all centered around Queeny there, about the thousand and one ways he'd violate her and make her his. Forever and ever, according to the poem I stumbled across."

"That is..." You start, not really knowing how to finish it. You're at a loss for words, and you're not ever sure if Carver has a pithy one liner to fill in the blanks.

"Creepier than a butcher shop full of human corpses?" Carver recommends. Okay, yeah that works. "Yeah, I'd say so, and in my line of work I've had to deal with that sort of bullshit before. It's usually cannibals, or necromancers, or cannibal necromancers. But, point being, this guy wrote out his rape fantasies of the vampire queen in such excruciatingly obscene detail that I am almost one hundred percent certain that it's a cipher."

"So what," you say, "he relies on how disgusted anyone who understands his writing in that they don't pay it any closer attention?"
>>
>>32366100
if we where going to go after her we should do it first before she undresses for her bath.
>>
>>32366922

"Yeah, actually," Carver explains, flipping the journal open and giving the passages a closer look. "You see this sort of thing a lot with cults that spring up in the bigger cities down in the Republic, to demons and devils and the sort of thing that makes angels and demons want to team up to kill. Cultist'll write up in exsquisite detail how he ate this gal or raped and murdered this gent in the name of whatever unpronounceable thing they worship. Makes the guards all want to throw up, and keeps us folks at DIO with our paychecks because we're the only folks with the stomach to deal with this sort of shit.

"Anyways, so the cultist plays up the creepiness, but hides some critical information within it. Steganography, it's called, though it can be anything, not just the stuff meant to creep you out. The person who wrote it, or the recipient of the message knows to look for it; most detectives and guardsmen don't. Hell, we only picked up on it because the Marquessa has a pet sociopath who reads this sort of thing like a kid reads penny dreadfuls."

"Alfons was not a man to keep things quiet," you say after a bit of time passed. "But if you're certain, how long will it take for you to find this information?"

"A day or two, maybe," Carver tells you. "A week tops. But here's a better question: are you really going to let your... good friend deal with that shit alone, kid?"

>She did not want to be disturbed.
>No, now that I know what it is that distresses her.
>I fail to see how this is relevant to finding out what Alfons hid.
>[Write In]
>>
I'm going to hit the hay. I'll probably be running Halfling Quest around noon tomorrow; next Paladin Quest thread will be Wednesday or Thursday, depending.
>>
>>32366950
>No, now that I know what it is that distresses her.
CHIVALRY
>>
>>32366950
>>No, now that I know what it is that distresses her.
>>
>>32366977
THANK YOU
*Passes out*
>>
>>32366977
Thanks for running. What did you think of the movie?
>>
>>32366950
>No, now that I know what it is that distresses her.


>>32366977
Thanks for running! Looking forward to both quests!
>>
>>32366977
Thanks for running.
>>
>>32366950
>No, now that I know what it is that distresses her.

She's almost definitely going to be naked.
>>
>>32367017
It was magnificent. Especially the part where the scientist goes full WWE announcer.
>>
>>32366950
>No, now that I know what it is that distresses her.

NOBLE INTENTIONS
>>
>>32366977
Oh, bye dude thanks for the run.
>>
>>32367074
I loved the bit where the brass were like "MURICA FUCK YEAH NUKES DIDN'T KILL IT SO WE JUST NEED TO USE BIGGER ONES" and that scientists was like "wat..." and then his 'I told you so' moment later
>>
>>32366950
>No, now that I know what it is that distresses her.

She asked that Alfons be given a clean death... this has to be a helluva betrayal. She probably blamed herself at first. The corruption of a good man. What must have gone through her mind when she made Fei a Hungering Prince. Three days of waiting to see if it had gone wrong. Burying basically an entire town. When we start with the comforting, we need to a strong game plan. She just took a hit just as she was beginning to come up for air. I dunno about you guys, but I hope to start flexing those write-ins.



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