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/tg/ - Traditional Games


Sorry I'm late, guys. Got involved in a campaign on Red Orchestra 2. We eventually managed to drive the foul Soviets back to the pit that spawned them, in the name of the Fatherland.

Twitter here: https://twitter.com/LoverofTang

Archive here: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=tangfag

IRC channel is #ngeq on Rizon.


The entry plug for Evangelion Unit-04 smells of blood and what you assume is Mari, lavender and apples. Probably her soap and shampoo, you distantly note. You're several sizes too large for the pilot's crash couch, but that's not a problem, as you're almost tall enough on your own to be able to reach everything from the bottom. You're faced with a problem, though. You've gone over almost every inch of the damned thing, despite Dr. von Franken's loud and accented protests.

Leaning against the tube's wall, you stare at the crash couch. You've gone over it, as well, and it's clear. There are no bombs on the Evangelion or in the entry plug. You've vetted everyone involved with the activation test, and except for Percival Robards, who had a questionable absence from the United States four years ago, there's nothing wrong with any of the crew.. Unless activation tests generally explode, there's not much you can do to protect it now.

So now it's back to basic instincts and gut feelings. You hate operating with basic instinct and gut feeling. Too much could go wrong if your gut is wrong, too much to go tits up if your instinct isn't right. It's a Catch Twenty-fucking-two if ever there was one, and you're not drunk enough for this. Climbing out of the entry plug, you light a cigarette while your legs dangle off the side, and you try to figure out what to do now.

[]Check the biology section. There might be some sort of plague or something there.
[]Check the Eva's armory. A good place to hide explosives.
[]Write-in. (Seriously write-ins are great.)
>>
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>>33588883
iirc they never went through properly the armour, maybe get someone on that?
Let's check bio section I guess.
>>
>>33588883
>[x]Check the Eva's armory. A good place to hide explosives.
>>
>>33588883
>Check the programming, look for any kind of bug that could be lethal to the pilot.
>Check the armoury.
>>
>>33588883
>[x]Check the biology section. There might be some sort of plague or something there.

That woudl be something most wouldn't think of looking, Evas are BIO-mechanical after all.
>>
>>33588883
>[]Write-in. (Seriously write-ins are great.)
Inquire about any previous issues that might be cause for alarm with the Eva.
>>
>>33588883
>[]Check the biology section. There might be some sort of plague or something there.
>Check if biology has had any unscheduled deliveries that could have accounted for that blood trail.
>>
>>33589059
>>33589054
>>33589045
>>33589029
All of these, make emphasis on how we are looking out for Mari more-so after the recent attempt on our life.
>>
Real quick question: What's you guys' opinion of the pacing so far?

Also, writing.
>>
>>33589625
not too bad
>>
>>33589625
How long until we get fucking smashed and try to pilot an eva?
>>
>>33589625
Nice, the pace is slow enough to allow a nice story to unfold with an interesting plot. While being fast enough not to take the piss.
>>
>>33589625
When will we see Misato naked after downing 6 piss-pour sake bombs?
>>
>>33588883
Ok, so we saw a big blood smelling thing under a tarp, we have heard reference made to an engine. Perhaps time for some inductive reasoning?
>>
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>

Dangling on the edge of the entry plug, cigarette held in your hands, you flag down Dr. von Franken. He moseys his way on over to look up at you, and asks what you want.

“Howdy, hoss,” you declare in your worst American accent. “I'm needin' to know if there's any issues with the Eva that might cause the shit to hit the fan, if'n you know what I'm saying?”

“Nein! Eva is glorious masterpiece of engineering! No problems at all! Filthy Catholic, you're polluting the Eva's entry plug!”

“Good to know there's no issues. What about anything that could kill the pilot?”

“Pilot is unimportant. Replaceable, ja? But no, nothing that can kill the pilot, other than the Angels and if you don't do your job, Section Two.” Waving off what's undoubtedly his unrepeatable in polite company praise, he shoots you a glare and then wanders off to go harass his poor interns, or something.

Right. That's a dead end, he's not going to tell you shit if you want it. So you call Smith.

“Howdy, hoss,” he greets in his actual accent, something vaguely Mid-Westernish. You think. You're from the Isles, not America.

“Smith,” you greet neutrally. “Can you get into the Eva's programming?” You drop from the entry plug and onto a catwalk, beginning the saunter to the Evangelion's armory while Smith hums in your ear.

“No can do, Boss. Just tried. Mari says to put her on the phone, though.” Oh Christ. Sighing, you tell him to do so.

(1/2)
>>
“Hi Special Agent!”

“Hello, Mari. Can you get into your Eva's programming for me?”

“Yes! I looked up what you told me a few days back, too, and it's from some war movie. Smith said it was shitty and I shouldn't watch it, but I did anyway and honestly you're nothing like whatshisname, Jack.”

“Don't swear. It's unbecoming an officer and a gentlewoman,” you evade her question. “Anyway, I don't know what you're trying to say. What's the programming look like?”

“Fairly standard stuff, really. 'If arm lost, cut off blood flow,' honestly. Nothing interesting. Why?”

“Just wondering,” you say evasively. It wouldn't do to worry her.

“Hey, before you go, we should go see a-” you hang up the phone with the force of a thousand angry wolverines, and finally find the armory for the Evangelion. You see a prototype rifle that looks more like a large battle rifle than the pallet rifles you had been briefed on, which were honestly more like assault rifles firing 9mm or .22 for all the good they'd done.

In one corner there's a large progressive knife propped against the wall. It looks more like a miniature sword, though, but there's nothing that jumps out and screams “bomb” at you.

[]Investigate further.
[]Head on to the Biology Division, you've wasted enough time.
[]Write-in.
>>
>>33590111
> Head to biology.
We need to ask about the tarped meat.
>>
>>33590111
>[]Investigate further.
>[]Head on to the Biology Division, you've wasted enough time.

"Smith, see what you can find out about that shit from earlier in Biology."
>>
>>33590111
[]Head on to the Biology Division, you've wasted enough time.
>>
>>33590111
>[x]Head on to the Biology Division, you've wasted enough time.
>>
>>33590111
>[x]Head on to the Biology Division, you've wasted enough time.

Wasn't this meant to be renamed "Evangelion: You can (not) operate"?
>>
>>33590111
>[x]Head to the Biology Division

We should also try to find the engine, too. It vanishing is suspicious.
>>
>>33590879
Very suspicious.
>>
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>>33590111
>“Yes! I looked up what you told me a few days back, too, and it's from some war movie."

FUCK, SHE CAUGHT US

>“Hey, before you go, we should go see a-”

... and she still wants to

wait, does

does that mean that

that she
>>
>To Biology!

Giving the armory one last check, you don't find anything suspicious, and begin your traipse to Biology, the lair of nerds and men more intelligent than you. Your phone buzzes in your pocket. It's Smith's phone, but in actuality it's probably Mari. Shoving the damned thing back into your pocket, you put on your sunglasses afterwards.

Now thoroughly disguised, you manage to slip past several people that would probably have recognized you otherwise, and your trip to Biology is thankfully shorter than your trip to the armory for the Eva. Biology is located above ground, in a building with lots of covered windows for some reason.

Entering from the cool Nevada morning to the even cooler air conditioned building, you try to read the map conveniently posted on the wall when you get a text. Checking it, it's Mari. “You're better than that Jack fellow” it says. Oh God. How horrifying.

“Well fuck,” you say to the wall. The wall doesn't say anything back, because it's a wall. Quietly, you turn off your phone and put it back in your pocket, and turn back to the map. According to it, Biology is divided into three groups. Metaphysical biology, Evangelion biology- that's weird. You thought they were simply large robots. That's something to ask someone later, though. The last group is Angel biology. Probably studying what the best chemical weapons to hit them with would be.

[]Head for the Metaphysical biology guys.
[]Go find the Evangelion biology dudes and question them.
[]Angel biology is sure to have something.
[]Write-in.
>>
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>>33591157
>>
>>33591192
>[]Go find the Evangelion biology dudes and question them.
>>
>>33591157
What did we tell her, i forgot
>>
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>>33591157
>>
>>33591258

Some cheesy line out of an old war movie (apparently) about The Horrors Of War. She just caught us red-handed at it, too.

AND SHE STILL LIKES US.

So when she said "you're nothing like [character]," she meant we were... cooler?

OH GOD BACKFIRING
>>
>>33591192

Go find the Evangelion biology dudes and questiont hem
>>
>>33591192
>[x]Head for the Metaphysical biology guys.
>>
>>33591288

Well in that case

>>33591192

While we're walking to evangelion biology would should just shoot off a simple "thanks" to mari. No need to be a jerk
>>
>>33591157
>“Hey, before you go, we should go see a-”

See a doctor?
>>
>>33591192
>[]Go find the Evangelion biology dudes and question them.
And after that, we can go ask if they can find a way to for us to torture information directly from the souls.
Or perhaps they can help us use our Angel-powered A.T. Field instead of burning away our normal human A.T. Field and destroying our soul back at the Metaphysical Biology
>>
>>33591192
[]Head for the Metaphysical biology guys.
[]Go find the Evangelion biology dudes and question them.
[]Angel biology is sure to have something.
Check all of them. Ask if any strange deliveries came in earlier.
>>
>>33591338
she's teen pregnant
>>
>>33591192
>[x]Go find the Evangelion biology dudes and question them.
We should definitely find out how someone could tamper with an Eva. If everything mechanical is clear, they have to be going after the biology.
>>
>>33591192
>[x]Go find the Evangelion biology dudes and question them.
>>
>>33591192
>[x]Go find the Evangelion biology dudes and question them.
About the round thing that smelled like blood and was covered with a tarp a few days ago in the main hangar.

If they go on about illegal and classified, tell them this whole test is illegal because it doesn't have UN approval.
>>
>Evangelion biology. Those nerds probably know what's up.

Following the map to the offices and labs where the Evangelion biology guys hold fief, you don't HEAR any shrieks as poor, unwilling prisoners of war are tortured to death. But NERV doesn't do that. Right? RIGHT? Probably not. When you come across the first door labeled “Doctor,” you knock on it. No one answers. It's the same all along the brightly lit hallway, until you finally find a cluster of people standing around a water cooler. Looking at them, they look at you.

“Sup. nerds,” you greet. Their faces instantly assume reactions varying from hostility to almost tears, and you smack your hand into your face. “Christ, I'm kidding. Don't get your knickers in a twist, yeah? Anyway, I'm Section Two conducting an investigation and I need to know if you guys have had any recent deliveries?”

They look at each other, then back at you, then back at each other. “Nope,” they say in unison. Yeah, that's bullshit, you're calling bullshit.

“Horse shit,” you say calmly. “I know SOMEONE fucking did because there was something under a tarp that I saw earlier, but when I went back to look at it, it was gone. And in before someone mentions 'illegal' and 'classified' the activation test later? That's even more illegal because the UN hasn't fucking approved it. So somebody better start talking, or I start opening up filing cabinets.”

“Well, what can it hurt? He's Section Two, right? They're the good guys, too,” a timid looking man ventures from the back of the group.

[]”That's the stuff, Sparky. You can talk to me.”
[]”I need to talk to someone in charge about this.”
[]Write-in.
>>
>>33591813
>[]Write-in.
"Keep talking, man. We're dealing with some serious shit here, and I want to make sure no one else gets hit."
>>
>>33591813
[]”That's the stuff, Sparky. You can talk to me.”
>>
>>33591813
Thats the stuff sparky, you can talk to me
>>
>>33591813
>[x]Write-in.
"Exactly. I'm a good guy. You're a good guy. We're all good guys here."
>>
>>33591843
>"Keep talking, man. We're dealing with some serious shit here, and I want to make sure no one else gets hit."
Or wind up dead in a crater where this base used to be.
>>
>>33591813
>[]Write-in.
This: >>33591868 . Add In that we're here in order to make sure that Mari doesn't end up dead as a doornail.
>>
>>33591813
[]Write-in.
What do you know, Sparky? It'd be in all of our best interests that you help me out.
>>
>something Happens
>we save Mari's life
>desperate scramble to re-assign credit ensues
>>
>>33591868
>>
>>33591868
>>33591843
These two.
>>
>>33592125
>Fail
>Have to continue the job with a hyperactive, possibly horny teenage EVA pilot trying to get in our pants.
>This is happening while Shinji is having to deal with Rei and Asuka and the Angels all at the same time.
>>
>Write-in.

"Keep talking, man. We're dealing with some serious shit here, and I want to make sure no one else gets hit,” you say reassuringly. “You're a good guy, I'm a good guy, we're all good guys here, right?”

“R-right,” he ventures, then swallows, and goes on, his courage gathered. “We got one about five days ago, but it was only transported to the lab the day after that.” You tune him out momentarily, but the time line matches up, so you resume actively listening to him.

“-o I mean, we were supposed to be trying to see if it could power something small, to start out with, but that didn't work even from the shard Tokyo-3 sent us, so we flash-cloned it in a vat-”

“Wait,” you halt him. “What did you get from Tokyo-3?”

“A partial S2 engine, from the Fifth Angel. Well, really it was more scraps, but they were semi-intact, right? So we tried to use 'em to power something small, like a coffeemaker, but that didn't work so then we flash-cloned it in a vat and we're going to try using the cloned organ to power a computer.”

That sounds like it could go horribly wrong. But why were they, the Evangelion biology guys, testing an Angel organ? You ask this question.

“They want to try and stick one into an Evangelion to get around the issue of power and the time limit it imposes, we think, but no one's told us anything. Anyway, yeah, we're doing that in, uh....” the man checks his watch, “about twenty minutes.”

[]Ding ding ding, you have a winner. If something's going to go wrong, it'll be there.
[]”Thanks.” You need more information. It won't do to stop something that's beneficial.
[]Write-in.
>>
>>33592321
>[]Write-in.
"Wait a minute. Isn't that really fucking dangerous? What if it contaminates the Eva or some shit?"
>>
>>33592321
>[]Ding ding ding, you have a winner. If something's going to go wrong, it'll be there.
>Keep vigilant just in case of some other type of infiltration
>>
>>33592321
[]Ding ding ding, you have a winner. If something's going to go wrong, it'll be there.
>>33592385
These two are good
>>
>>33592321
>[]Ding ding ding, you have a winner. If something's going to go wrong, it'll be there.
>>
>>33592321
>[]Ding ding ding, you have a winner. If something's going to go wrong, it'll be there.
Niggah get that shit outta here until we KNOW it can at least power a coffeemaker.
>>
>>33592321
> Ding ding ding, you have a winner.
Nope, no angel bits into our principal's EVA while we are on the job. It would be a real shame if we needed Mr. Parabellum to argue the point for us.
>>
>>33592321
>[x]Ding ding ding, you have a winner. If something's going to go wrong, it'll be there.
You know, it'd be great if the Eva could be upgraded to be able to run more than 5 minutes on a internal battery, but this is Neon Genesis. We cannot have nice things.
>>
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>>33592321
>[]Ding ding ding, you have a winner. If something's going to go wrong, it'll be there.

We Dirac Sea now
>>
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>>33592321
>[]Ding ding ding, you have a winner. If something's going to go wrong, it'll be there.
"Fantastic. Of course it wouldn't be tested properly before sticking it in an Evangelion. No, that would only be PROPER and SENSIBLE and SAFE."
>>
>>33592321
>[]Ding ding ding, you have a winner. If something's going to go wrong, it'll be there.

Point this >>33592385 specifically out.

Watch out for that imminent... what do those techs back at NERV call it? Ah yes, "Pattern Blue."
>>
>>33592482
Wait no, bad reading, it's not going straight in an Evangelion.


"Ah yes, the elusive, rare and dangerous 'Pattern Blue'. Maybe this time I can see one with me own eyes instead of being knocked out for some reason or another."
>>
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>>33592287
>Mari gets upset that we're ignoring her, starts asking around
>"Oh, he was investigating something to make sure you didn't drop dead."
>"HE REALLY DOES CARE!"
>>
>>33592321
>>33592421 is good. We need to make sure there's no way the computer they're testing it on can contaminate the Eva. While probably keeping a healthy distance.
>>
>>33592321
>[]Ding ding ding, you have a winner. If something's going to go wrong, it'll be there.
Ah, mad science.
Well, daft science, at any rate. How did they not expect this to backfire?
>>
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>>33592565
>>
>>33592565
>Go to sleep at night with all doors and windows locked, the vents boarded up with as much chicken wire as we can fit in.
>Wake up the next day with a hole in the wall and Mari sleeping nest to us.
>It slowly dawn on what happened while you slept.
>>
>>33592703
Reminder: It's NGE: the only girl not really fucked in the head is a lesbian practically
>>
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>

"Wait a minute. Isn't that really fucking dangerous? What if it contaminates the Eva or some shit?"

“See, that's why we were trying to test it on a coffeemaker and then a computer, first, to make sure they suddenly don't turn into horrendous creatures from beyond the abyss of darkness-” You look at him, hard, and he suddenly swallows again, this time in fear for his vocal chords. “We wanted to make sure they were compatible with human technology.”

“Right. Makes sense. But before you go sticking fucking alien organs RECOVERED FROM A CORPSE into our only LINE OF DEFENSE FROM THEM, why not try to implement a HUMAN solution to the power issue?”

“We have. The Evangelions are temperamental and don't like anything we've tried so far, including nuclear fusion engines.” Jesus Christ, you mutter as you cross yourself. How horrifying.

“So, wait. Why is there an Evangelion 'biology' group?”

“No one's told you? The Evangelions are part cyborg.” And suddenly, you don't want to know any more. Feeling slightly sick, you thank them for their time. You leave the nerds to their water cooler, and you work through what you've just learned.

The Evangelions aren't all metal and machine. Part of them is organic. Someone wants to put the organ that powers the Angels into an Evangelion. They don't know if this will affect human technology or vice versa. 'Evangelions are temperamental.' That's probably the biggest issue, you think, but not one you can or probably need to concern yourself with.

[]Find where they're going to test the S2 engine, see if you can't stop it.
[]More information is necessary before pursuing a course of action.
[]Write-in.
>>
>>33592893
>[x]Find where they're going to test the S2 engine, see if you can't stop it.
>>
>>33592893
>[]Find where they're going to test the S2 engine, see if you can't stop it.

Get work to the sub-commander and NERV HQ Head of Science.
>>
>>33592947
yeah this
>>
>>33592893
>[]Find where they're going to test the S2 engine, see if you can't stop it.
At the very least try and get it moved to somewhere that won't be missed "if" things go tits-up.
>>
>>33592893
>[x]More information is necessary before pursuing a course of action.
>>
>>33592893
>[]Find where they're going to test the S2 engine, see if you can't stop it.
>>
>>33592977
And also this >>33592947
>>
>>33592893
>[]Find where they're going to test the S2 engine, see if you can't stop it.
>>
>>33592893

Find where they're going to test the S2 engine and stop it

Also guys if the Eva's are part cyborg could we be part eva?

captcha "Apocalypse espinyou"
>>
>>33592893
>[x]Write-in.
Get out of there.

We can't stop the test, but we can save both Mari and Smith.

Fuck the nerds, they can power up the EVA without the pilot right? RIGHT! So lets get the fuck out before the entire site gets turned to their base atoms.
>>
Guys.
What if Tang-chan anticipates this and it is merely a clever ploy to get our arses raped on a silver platter?
>>
>>33592893
>[]Find where they're going to test the S2 engine, see if you can't stop it.
Ok. Priorities. First, we stop the stupid thing.
Then, we fix whatever stupid thing we did to stop the first stupid thing.
>>
>>33593038
We know that this is all shit. There are better alternatives to the EVA power problems, such as big fucking capacitors, or switching the EVAs out during combat.
>>
>>33593097
What if it would actually work, here.
And perfectly.
And the sabotage shit is coming from another angle.
>>
>>33593244
In actual NGE, NERV Nevada got vaporised by the S2 engine test.

Along with everything in 50KM of it.

That would be bad for our job seeing as OUR FUCKING PILOT IN IN 50KM OF IT!
>>
>>33593307

Actually, the pilot survived.

The base crew didn't.
>>
>>33593323
>Actually, the pilot survived.
And where did you get that idea?
>>
>>33593323
The point stands. Mari is still within 50Km of the S2 engine. If that goes up, she's so fucking dead, us too, and then Shinji will be forever without our great advice and protection. He'll never be able to drive around in the Jeep we took from the German guy.

Oh the suffering!
>>
>

You have an objective. You have an idea of what's going on, and how you can stop it. But where? You turn back around and reenter the room with the water cooler.

“Where's this test supposed to be held?”

“In the basement,” someone different from the man you'd originally talked to said.

“Great. How do I get there?”

“Take the elevator down. Like, duh,” one woman says, and you turn to look at her. She quivers under your gaze, and you can't tell if that's a good thing. Thanking her, you turn and find the nearest elevator. On an instinct, you check your pistol. Loaded, round chambered, four magazines ready to rock.

You take the elevator down, and NERV proves it has shitty taste in Musak all over the world. Sighing, you can't even muster the necessary hate to swear about the Musak.

The elevator dings, the doors open, like elevators all over the world. You step out, and you realize you forgot to tell Smith what was going on. Fucking brilliant, Cryan, fucking brilliant. Shaking your head, you begin looking for someone.

You finally find a janitor, sweeping the floor.

“Sup,” he greets you.

“Sup,” you greet. “I need to find an S2 test thingy?”

He looks at you. Then he really looks at you, like he's looking into your soul. And then his hand reaches into his cart. Split second decision. No turning back. What if he's got a gun? Then you're going to pump him full of bullets.

[]He's going for a gun! Shoot him.
[]He might not be going for a gun. Your spiffy new armor will protect you, just in case.
[]Write-in.
>>
>>33593483
>[]Write-in.
S-2 Badge
>>
>>33593483
[]He might not be going for a gun. Your spiffy new armor will protect you, just in case.
>>
>>33593483
>[]Write-in.
Duck back into the elevator, tackle him when he runs out of bullets (if he has a gun)!
>>
>>33593483
>[]Write-in.
Level gun at head with a simple "No". Fire if he persists.
>>
>>33593483
>Gun pointed at him, tell him to back away from the cart with his hands where you can see them.
>Shoot to incapacitate if he doesn't comply.
>>
>>33593483
>[x]He might not be going for a gun. Your spiffy new armor will protect you, just in case.
No need to pull.
>>
>>33593483
>Write-in
Stand there and watch.

If he pulls a gun then head for cover.
If he doesn't then continue.

No need to kill anyone yet, we are on a murder break.
>>
>>33593483
>>33593553
I'm inclined towards this. Let's not rely too much on our armour where we can avoid it.
>>
>>33593483
>[]Write-in.
Move into a ready for action pose (knees bent, ready to dive in a direction). If he pulls, shoot to wound. If he pulls out something non-lethal, relax.
>>
>>33593483

These
>>33593532
>>33593553
Do what cops do when accosting someone who's acting suspicious.
>>
>>33593799
Those are Americans.

We are British. Thus, the American cop mentality doesn't stick with us.
>>
>>33593799
Shoot first, don't bother to ask questions later?
>>
>>33593844
Only if he's a minority
>>
>>33593866
Or military.
>>
>>33593842
>We are British.
So... brandish a club and politely talk him down?

I thought Cryan's Irish though?
>>
Your combat instincts, finely honed tools of destruction and mayhem, are going crazy. Your brain dumps an enormous amount of adrenaline into your bloodstream. Every inch of you screams to kill or flee. So you do the reasonable thing.

You split the difference. You dive back behind the corner you came around, even as your hand goes into your coat and you pull your pistol. You land hard, on your back, pistol up and aimed at the corner where the man has to poke his head around the corner if he wants to shoot you.

“Uh, dude? What are you doing? I was going to offer you a Butterfinger.” His head slowly pokes around the corner, the self-same candy bar leading the way like a battleflag.

“Shut. Up.” Slowly you stand, and reholster the pistol. You turn the corner, and the man hands you the candy bar. Nodding your thanks, you slip it into a pocket.

“Sup,” you both try again. “I'm looking for a test thingy,” you try.

“Oh, yeah, down the hall and to the right. You okay there, bud?”

You shake your head. “Nope. Thanks for the directions.” He waves your thanks off with a friendly grin, and you continue on your way.

[]Pistol out just in case.
[]No pistol. Don't want to startle anyone.
[]Write-in.
>>
>>33594018
>[]Write-in.
One hand on the holster for quick-draw, just in case. Paranoia set to Eleven.
>>
>>33594018
>[]Pistol out just in case.
We want to stop the test. If nothing else, it'd be a good way to distract people.
>>
>>33594018
>[]No pistol. Don't want to startle anyone.
>>
>>33594018
[]Write-in.
Lets tell Smith what we're doing
>>
>>33594018
Eh, this one just in case though >>33594054
>>
>>33594018
>>[]Write-in.
>One hand on the holster for quick-draw, just in case. Paranoia set to Eleven.
>>
>>33594018
>[]Pistol out just in case.
Better to have it out, and not need it, than need it and get shot in the bollocks because we felt like getting cocky.
>>
>>33594018
>>33594119
>also call or text smith to let him know where we are
>>
>>33594018
This >>33594054
Can we speed-dial HQ from down here & >>33592947
>>
>>33594125
>>
>>33594106
>>33594156
We're underground though, so the signal might not go through.
Maybe there's a nearby terminal for comms, but that has a chance of getting intercepted.
>>
>>33594054
>>33594070
>>33594114
>>33594119
>>33594125
>>33594172
>>33594175
WHY IS EVERYONE SO PARANOID! JUST CHILL, ELSE PEOPLE WILL START TO THINK THAT WE'RE THE TRAITOR!
>>33594018
>No pistol...
>>
>>33594267
Any moment not spent being paranoid is a moment something bad can happen. At least we're self aware about it, right?
>>
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>>33594267
>WHY IS EVERYONE SO PARANOID
Is this your first thread? It has to be to ask such a question.
>>
>>33594018
CHECK
THE FUCKING
CANDY BAR

DEM SMALL BOMBS MANG

Also no pistol.
>>
>>33594422
He is suspicious, isn't he...

We should have shot him.
>>
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>>33594267
Paranoia is a valuable survival trait right now.
When you keep running into people trying to kill you, you should probably start expecting people to try and kill you.
>>
>

One hand on your pistol holster, you turn the corner and step into the room the janitor indicated. Inside, there's a red spherical thing sitting on a platform. There's cords and wires running to and from it to a small desktop computer. The assembled people, about six, turn to look at you, and the lead man looks you up and down.

“Can we help you, Agent?” Ah, so he's already picked out you're a Section Two Agent.

“Can you guys delay the test for a bit?” They look at you, then at each other.

“Yeah, of course. Section Two says 'delay' we're going to delay like bitches.” Finally! Some cooperation! It feels great! Grinning at the man, you turn the phone on and shoot Smith a short text letting him know where you are and what you're doing. He'll get word to Fuyutsuki for you, if it goes tits up.

You're sliding the phone back into your pocket, pointedly ignoring the texts and voicemails from Mari, when the door opens behind you, and you begin to turn. Your ears pick up a click behind you, and you almost get off a sigh before something slams into your back, knocking you forward, and you hear the sharp reports of an AKM as the shooter behind you begins stitching the room with 7.62x39mm.

(1/2)
>>
You hit the ground, hard, and you're fairly certain you just broke your left wrist under you, trying to catch your fall, but that's small time, someone just shot you. Forcing yourself to roll over, you see the janitor holding an AKM pistol, his face set in grim determination.

Setting your own face, your draw your pistol with your good hand, flip the safety off, and settle the sights on him, using a knee to prop it up and aim. You take a breath, and begin firing into his chest. He goes down almost as hard as you, the six shots you placed into his chest in rapid order shredding his lungs and heart.

You look down, and see that you're bleeding quite a bit. Huh. That-

Black. Everything's black, and the nothingness is comforting. But you can't stay in the black, can you? There's people to be protected, aren't there? Are they close to you? Not really. Will they be? Maybe.

What's it going to be, mate? You going to stay in the comforting embrace of the dark? Or are you going to find the light?

[]Stay.
[]Go.
>>
>>33594861
[]Get the fuck up.
Fuck you, conscience. We're in this for the long haul.
>>
>>33594861
>[]Stay.
>[]Go.
>Implying there's time for this kind of bullshit
>[X]Wake the fuck up.
>>
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>>33594861
>[]Go.
This is it gentlemen.

I'ts been an honour posting with you all...
>>
>>33594861
[x] Up & at 'em soldier.

And return that fuck's Butterfinger. Snickers are superior anyway.
>>
>>33594861
>[]Go.
Damn. Had a feeling that janitor and his cart needed a frisking.
Thought there'd be time to ask a nearby tech about that "nice, candy giving janitor."
>>
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>>33594939
[]Stay.
[X]Go.

Whelp, its time.
>>
>>33594861

Dying is for SEALs. You were trained better than that.

[X] GET. UP.
>>
>>33594982
Of course I fuck it up
Meant for this >>33594861
>>
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>>33594948
>>33594955
>>33594982
bunch of sissy quitters.
>>
>>33594861
>>33594939
This fits so damn well.
>>
>>33594861
>[]Get the fuck up.
>>
>>33595018
>You going to stay in the comforting embrace of the dark?
>Or are you going to find the light?

>[]Stay.
>[]Go.

Learn to read context, dipshit.
>>
>>33595059
Yeah, that whole "heading toward the light" thing usually goes the other way
>>
>>33594939
>>33594906
>>33594949
>>33595010
>>33595044
Time to wake up and wax that fucking janitor
>>
>>33594861
[]Go.
>>
>>33594861
>Light Up the Night
>>
>>33595105
Six 9mm Parabellum shredded his heart and lungs. He doesn't need waxing anymore.
>>
>>33594948
LIKE FUCK IT'S THE END!
>>33594861
>[]Wake up
LETS GET MOVING SOLDER, WHAT ARE YOU? A MAN, OR A MOUSE? NEITHER, YOUR EX-SAS,MARC AND SECTION 2! YOU ARE THE ABSOLUTE PINICLE OF HUMAN LIFE!

SO PUT THAT BRUTE STRENGTH TO USE, IT'S TIME TO MOVE!
(read above in a drill instructor's voice)
>>
>>33595141
Double-tap.
Just in case.
>>
>>33595160

And then stab the Wanker's corpse for good Measure.
>>
>Go, and get the fuck up. They forged you better than this, didn't they?

The dark is comforting, yes. It's warm and soft and it's an amalgamation of your mother and all the girlfriends you loved and it smells of your mother, lavender and chocolate chip cookies and safety. But you haven't been a child in a long time, have you? No, and in the deepest, darkest depths of night...

You regret it. You regret not having your innocence anymore. You regret not being able to run to someone bigger, older, with your darkest fears and secret loathings. But like you told your last dream hallucination. You weren't a child anymore. You'd put away the childish things and the toys. You would be fucked if you stayed in the warmth and comfort when there was a fight to be fought, a cunt with his shit needing kicked in, a defenseless Child needing protected.

And then....

.
.
….

“Fuck,” you say softly, eyes still closed. You're almost afraid to open them and look at the hospital ceiling, but it'll just be one more in a career that has seen several. So you do. It's not a hospital ceiling. It's the bedroom you share with Smith. There's two people sitting in the room with you. Mari is curled up on Smith's bed, snoring quietly. Smith is sitting in a chair, next to you.

“Glad to see you're not dead,” he whispers.

“Thanks,” you say just as quietly.

“Docs fished three 7.62 steel core bullets out of you. Said the only reason they hadn't shredded your guts beyond all recognition was the layer of calc carb under the first layer. That mean anything to you?”

“Yes.” You don't elaborate. “How long has it been?”

(1/2)
>>
“A day. Everything went fine. The experiment you stopped didn't work, so the Evas are stuck with 5 minutes internal power, for now.”

“How's M-” you begin, but Smith shushes you.

“She's been a trooper about it.” For some reason he's standing, and leaning over you now.

“Y'know, it would have been nice to know about the subdermal armor.”

[]”Yeah? I thought it was a nice ace up my sleeve.”
[]”Next time they screw with my body without my permission you'll be the first to know.
[]Write-in.
>>
>>33595403
>[]”Next time they screw with my body without my permission you'll be the first to know.
>>
>>33595403
>[]”Next time they screw with my body without my permission you'll be the first to know.
>[]Write-in.
"Sorry for keeping shit away from you. Anyway, janitor's our guy. You get him?"
>>
>>33595138
http://youtu.be/riF9nrWbJyk
>>
>>33595403
>[]”Next time they screw with my body without my permission you'll be the first to know.
>[]Write-in.
Only learned about it yesterday myself
>>
Rolled 12

>>33595403
>[]Write-in.
"I had the same thought the first time I got shot here."
>>
>>33595369
>>33595160
>>33595141

"Agent Cryan, your efforts to protect NERV and it's interests is commendable, but your metods were..... excessively through."

"It's called 'setting an example', sir."

"Setting an example involved beating a corpse with a Fax machine."

"Yes."

"And then setting it on fire."

"Yes."

"And then trying to force it down the Unit-"

"Commander, with respect, are we going to do this point by point? Because I had other things planned for this week."
>>
>>33595403
>[]”Next time they screw with my body without my permission you'll be the first to know.
"...Sorry."
>>
>>33595403

Seconding >>33595438
>>
>>33595403
>>33595438
Thirded
>>
>>33595403
>>33595438
Xth numbered
>>
>>33595403
>Write in
So this is what Its like to be mortal...
>>
>Write-in.

“I had the same thought the first time I got shot here, you know.”

“Ha,” he laughs. “Funny.”

“The janitor was our man. Did you get him?” Smith looks at you for a long moment, concern in his brown eyes, and you look away.

“Do you remember putting six in the X-ring, hoss? You sure as shit got him. The doctor that performed the autopsy described his heart and lungs as 'shredded hamburger meat.'”

“Oh,” you say quietly. “Oh.” You look up again, and Smith is holding something behind his back.

“You know,” he says, still quiet. “You almost make me feel bad about this.” He brings his hands around from his back as you try to scoot away, to the wall, every instinct in you screaming to flee, but it's too late, there's a pillow descending onto your face and you're still too weak to stop it.

It smells like lavender and apples, just like Mari's entry pl- Smith can't know about the pistol you keep under the mattress everywhere you go, can he? You put it there while he was out. Your hand goes for it, and one of his stops you.

“Nuhuh,” he says over you casually. “That's not nice, Dec. You're supposed to be smarter than shoving shit under the mattress, you Irish fuck.” That's offensive. You're not fucking Irish, you're Northern Irish. The world is going dark again, from the lack of oxygen, you surmise, and your fist lashes out with the last of your strength.

Smith stumbles back- you must have caught him in the groin, muttering. Shoving the pillow off your face, you see Mari watching with wide eyes, shrunk back against the wall on Smith's bed. To your left, there's an AK-74 propped against a wall, bayonet fixed. To your right, on the bedside table, there's your CZ-75.

[]Go for the rifle.
[]Go for the pistol.
[]Choke his bitch ass out.
[]Write-in.
>>
>>33595803

Choke his bitch ass out

damnit smith, just as we were starting to trust you
>>
>>33595803
>[X]Choke his bitch ass out.
>>
>>33595803
>[]Choke his bitch ass out.
Show him what a NORTHERN Irish fuck can do when angry. Don't kill him though. Can't interrogate the dead.

Totally fucking called this.
>>
>>33595803
>[]Choke his bitch ass out.

Fuck you smith.
>>
>>33595803
>[]Write-in.
Whale away at Smith while we can. I don't think we have enough strength to maintain a stranglehold. "MARI, GET THE GUN."
>>
>>33595803
>[]Go for the pistol.
Anybody played TTT, and been the only innocent in a game full of traitors?

This is exactly like that.
>>
>>33595803
>[x]Choke his bitch ass out.
Is Smith stupid or something? If Smith wants to kill Declan, why didn't he do it when he was unconcious?
>>
>>33595803
>[]Go for the rifle.
Guys he almost smothered us and to quote the QM
>your fist lashes out with the last of your strength.
>>
>>33595803
>[]Choke his bitch ass out.
Knew it
>>
>>33595900
Exposition.
>>
>>33595803
>[]Go for the pistol.
Just shoot him
>>
>>33595803
Smith, you fucking cunt.
>[]Choke his bitch ass out.
>>
>>33595803
>[]Go for the rifle.
Bitch needs to get stuck. A whole fuck load.
>>
>>33595803
So Smith was the mole all along? Guess he was fed up with being the team bitch.
>>
>>33595803
>and your fist lashes out with the last of your strength.
guys
>last of your strength
>[X]Go for the pistol.

Fuck, our hero's a fucking Lancer with that this fucking luck.
>>
>>33595803
>[X]Go for the pistol.
we dont have the strength for a fist fight
>>
>>33595803
>Go for the pistol.

I hope we're using the CZ 75 AUTOMATIC variant. Just empty the whole clip into that cunt.
>>
>>33595803
[x]Go for the pistol.
'That's *Northern* Irish, you prick.'
>>
>>33595803
>[]Go for the pistol.
...oh Smith, you stupid little shit.

>>33595990
Luck of the Irish, mate.
>>
>>33595803

>Pistol

Aim for his face, he's wearing a vest.
>>
>>33595803
>[]Go for the pistol.

Aw, Smith...And I liked him, too. Maybe make sure you don't shoot to kill?
>>
>>33595803
>[X]Go for the pistol.
WE MOZAMBIQUE DRILL NAOW
>>
>>33595803

>Go for the pistol

"Seriously, am I the only member of this fucking organization with a secret Agenda and a backstabbing knife at the fucking ready?!?"
>>
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>Mari's going to go for a gun and kill that fucker
>splatter his blood all over her face
>her innocence shattered forever

[x] Go for the Rifle.

Handgun might well have been unloaded while we were sleeping. The rifle's bayonet, however, will still work fine. And if Mari's going to go for a weapon, the CZ-75 is her best bet.
>>
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>>33595803
Are you having a fucking giggle smith?
>Go for AK.
Time to get rekt!
>>
>>33596080

>With

Shit, I meant without. Without an agenda.

It is too soon to let them know.
>>
>>33595803
>[]Go for the rifle.
There's no telling if Smith unloaded the gun or not.
The rifle at least has the bayonet.
>>
>>33596094
>Not getting a hard-on for this.
>>
>>33595803
>[X]Choke his bitch ass out.
>>
>>33596094
She'd just get horny, dude.
>>
>>33596094

"Mari, here's a valuable lesson in Secret Agenting. Hate everyone you work with, then every act of betrayal is like fooking Christmas."

>>33596080

>With an agenda

What a hilarious typo.
>>
>>33595803
[X]Go for the rifle
>>
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>>33595803
>>
>>33595803
>[]Go for the rifle.
At least it definitely has the bayonet. Can't be sure Smith didn't unload the pistol.
>>
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>My friend just gave me a butterfinger.

Welp, Im fucked.
>>
>>33596224
Quick, get some subdermal armor.
>>
>>33595803
>[]Go for the bayonet.
>>33596208
>>
>>33595803
>[]Go for the rifle.
>>
>Choke him out. (When I called the votes, choking him won out.)

You force yourself from the bed, feeling every one of your twenty-eight years, and then you realize you're completely naked. More important things to do than get dressed, though, like choke Smith.

“Mari,” you rasp hoarsely. “Step outside. Now.” There's a quiet rage building, the likes you haven't felt since you first learned the bayonet. Out of the corner of your eye, you see her do as you said, closing the door quietly behind you.

Smith rights himself. He's shorter than you, by about three inches, and you've got maybe fifteen pounds on him. You stagger forward, set into the boxing stance you first learned at eight.

“That's how it is, then? Golden gloves? Marquess of Queensbury, then?” You grin at him. Then you close the distance and headbutt him in the nose. He goes backwards, and you bring a knee up into his groin. His knees close instinctively, and you hammer a fist into his gut. Martial arts aren't like street fighting. Sure, you know combatives, sure, they're effective. But fuck if street boxing doesn't feel GOOD after a cunt's just tried to choke you.

He goes down hard, and you follow him, slamming your fists into his nose the whole way.

“Why, you fucking cunt? What the fuck is your problem?” You ask, and he grins up at you through the mash of teeth and blood you've made of his mouth.

“Fabbot uh duharh muh,” he says, and then you feel a pistol pressed against your gut. “Cuh uh fuhy uhmuh suhp hus?” He asks you, still grinning, and you grin right the fuck back.

“Let's find out, motherfucker,” and you keep right on chugging along, even as he starts trying to shoot you. The fucker forgot his safety. By the time he gets it working again, and he's delirious, but he manages to put two into your side, before his arm collapses

[]Keep going. There will be no mercy.
[]Try to call a security team.
[]Write-in.
>>
>>33596278
>[]Write-in.
Punch him out. "You don't get to die so easily. You're gonna wish I killed you."
>>
>>33596278
>>33596303
Yesssss
>>
>>33596278
>[]Try to call a security team.
We need to stop getting ourselves shot.
>>
>>33596278
[x] Beat him unconscious & have Mari call a security team.
>>
>>33596278
>[]Try to call a security team.

I don't really want to kill him. Besides, too much killing probably wouldn't be too good for Cryan's psyche.
>>
>>33596278
>[]Write-in.
Knock the cunt out, tie him up and get some pants on. Then get a security unit, inform them that he tried to kill you and have his ass hauled off to a cell for PERSONAL INTERROGATION (beating him until his nuts are fucking paste)
>>
>>33596278

>Knock out

I would prefer incapacitating the traitor for interrogation, instead of killing him.

WE need to him so as to kindly inquire as to who thinks hiring people to fuck with us is so goddamn funny.
>>
>>33596350
this.
>>
>>33596371
Oh it will be funny.

For us, when he no longer has the ability to control anything below his wasteline, and his gentiles are bloody mash.
>>
>>33596278
>[]Keep going. There will be no mercy.
Beat him until he stops making noise. Then beat him some more. Then keep going until you know he's not getting up.

I don't really care if he lives or dies, and frankly I don't think we're coherent enough to notice the difference.
>>
>>33596350
>>33596400
>>33596371

Amend that with if he dies in their custody, they will be treated as traitors silencing an exposed mole.

We are NOT letting the closest thing we have to a lead slip away.
>>
>>33596278
>[]Try to call a security team.

>all this getting shot
Whomever the closest things to friends he has are going to rib him so hard over this.

>>33596428
>his gentiles are bloody mash
What have you got against non-Jews mate?
>>
>>33596473
No, you miss understand. I mean the whole thing GENERALLY. Not the pussy circumcision. I mean going at his balls with a lawnmower for being such a traitorous cunt.

I don't hate non-circumcised people as this would be to hate myself.
>>
>>33596526
Fun fact: Some cultures in Africa and the Middle East practice female circumcision.
>>
>>33596526
He's talking about the fact that you misspelled genitals for gentiles.
>>
>>33596526
You said gentile, not genital.
>>
>>33596526
>>33596473
>>33596546

Just so we're totally clear though, we ARE going to nut-punt him so hard he inverts and becomes genetically female?

Sometime during or after the interrogation?

I just wanna make sure we're all on the same page.
>>
>>33596546
Wat...

How does that even work?

My brain is full of fuck. After all the shit reguarding Gaza, Ukrane, Smith being a traitorous SOB and my poptarts going missing.
>>
>>33596601
cut off the labia and clitoris

FGM is some shit man
>>
Looks like might get to teach Mari how to run an interrogation and knowing her, she will probably enjoy it.
>>
Knock out. Break his arm to relieve him of the pistol, then beat him senseless WITH the pistol.
>>
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>>33596526
>No, you miss understand.
No, I'm thinking YOU misunderstand.

>>33596601
>How does that even work?
Google it.
>>
>>33596586
Nah, I don't want to be too violent.

>>33596601
I think it involves cutting some of the clitoris or something.
>>
>>33596601

You'll know it by another name: Female Gential Mutilation.
>>
>>33596601
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Female_genital_mutilation
>>
>>33596586
No. We're going to remove every nerve in his body manually, thus causing absolute pain, then we're going to stick his brain in a jar and then we're going to shoot it with a 30mm gatling cannon.
>>
>>33596646
Or put his brain in a borg body. That solves traitor problems on space stations so it'll work here, too, right?
>>
>>33596586

>Here is what happens to a male, medically speaking, as his testicles are crushed:

>As the pressure on the testicles increases, some males would quickly pass out. Most would pass out prior to the outer membrane of each testicle tearing open. Some unlucky ones would stay conscious due mostly to adrenaline. Even if they pass out at some point many would wake to vomit uncontrollably, some would also lose control of their bladders and defecate as well. Almost all would have trouble breathing since the pain is so severe that they would be forced to hold their breaths in a type of shock as most of the muscles in the body tense in response to the severe pain. Some would also lose their peripheral vision temporarily has the brain struggles to handle the overload of input from the testicles.

>After each testicle ruptures its contents would empty into the scrotal sac. The pain would continue from the rupture but the inside of the testicles have no pain receptors. Severe swelling would set in at once. Some males would go into shock around this time, some may have heart attacks or have medical issues due to the high blood pressure they are now experiencing. Some would die from the experience.

>This damage would be beyond repair and the remaining parts of the testicles would have to be surgically removed.

We might not be able to get any info out of him if we crush his balls.
>>
>>33596674

>Turn turncoat into Robocop.
>Hope this solves problems.

You know he betrayed the people who made him, right?

You paid attention to that movie and all?
>>
>>33596674
Bro. Do you even Star Trek?

Anything related to the Borg should be met by a nuke. Put him into a servitor body to maximum compliance.
>>
>>33596698
Hence why we do it afterwards...

ONCE we have extracted who hired him...
>>
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>Borg-ifiying
>Robocop-ifiying
please, you guys don't know shit.
Turn him into a Replicator hive-intelligence.
>>
>>33596709
>>33596723
Well, he'll have to follow the three laws! All we have to worry about is if someone has an electromagnetic card and unlocks him.
>>
>turning an enemy into something that could easily kill us
>>
>>33596769

>Three laws

You mean Asimov's three laws?

He wrote some stories about how those laws could be circumvented.

They consist of ALL OF HIS STORIES.
>>
>>33596800
Well, we could always make him a borg that has no way of hurting anyone.
>>
>>33596769
Do you even HAL9000?

You know, the AI that went crazy after it met a situation that caused a loophole in it's very software, one that lead it to killing everyone?
>>
>>33596709
Did you? Robocop was just being a cop, he let the people who made him continue on their merry corporate-bastard way while getting vengeance on the guys who did him wrong.

Still a terrible idea to make people we don't like Robocop.
>>
>>33596840

The point I was more making involved the fact that Murphy was still Murphy after being covered in Chrome.

We don't want badguys getting that shit and hoping a mild software patch is gonna help us.

Which is a point we largely seem to agree on, so I'm gonna go ahead and drop the argument if it's cool with you.
>>
>Beat him until he's conscious and have Mari call a security team so you can put some pants on, wrap your bullet wounds, and then beat him some more.

Through the haze of blood lust and pain and sheer hatred, you recognize you need to keep him alive. But you figure punching him in the gut will be safer and less risk of brain damage, so you start working him over lower down. After a while, you collapse backwards, spent.

“And it's Northern Irish, ye fookin' prick,” you say. He moans under you, and you take that as agreement. “Fookin' right I'm better'n'you, cunt. Been fookin' doin' t'is quite a while now.” Generally, your accent is more English than Irish, due to something something anthropology linguistics you don't fucking know you're a soldier and a psychologist.

Mari enters the room, takes in the remains of it, and Smith and yourself, and she quietly ventures a greeting.

“Hullo,” you tell her tiredly in response. “Go get a security team. Or something. And a medic. I'm bleeding, here.”

“O-oh.” She's extremely quiet for a moment, and then she runs off again, leaving you alone with your thoughts.

What a completely fucked situation, you decide. Smith was probably the real mole all along, for whoever, and he only revealed himself now because... He's a cunt. That's all you're drawing here. Smith is a huge fucking cunt, and you hate his guts.

When the security team arrives, you're staring at your mother sitting on Smith's bed staring at you. She smiles, and then she's gone just like she appeared.

[]”Detain him and see to his injuries. I need to speak with him.”
[]”Hand him over to your interrogators. And after they're done, make sure he disappears forever.”
[]Write-in.
>>
>>33596890
>[]”Detain him and see to his injuries. I need to speak with him.”

Why, Smith? Why?! I thought we had something special!
>>
>>33596890
>[]Write-in.
"Detain him and give him some manner of care. Once I've got this fucking lead out of me, I want to interrogate him personally. If he croaks, you're all goddamn terrorists."
>>
>>33596890
>[]”Detain him and see to his injuries. I need to speak with him.”
>>
>>33596890
"Detain him until I get my shit together. If anything happens to him you and anyone in security detail will be executed for treason."
>>
>>33596890

>Detain and see to his injuries.

"I'm holding you accountable for his containment and well being. If he disappears in ANY sense of the word, you get to personally explain that to Gendo Ikari."
>>
>>33596890
>[x]”Detain him and see to his injuries. I need to speak with him.”
>>
>>33596890
>[]”Hand him over to your interrogators. And after they're done, make sure he disappears forever.”
We need to let the trained professionals look at him, if we do it, we run the risk of killing him accidentally, before we get anything out of him.

We need to properly recover now, and make sure Mari doesn't go catonic from the crazy, nude northern Irishman who nearly got killed three times this week and just beat Smith unconscious.
>>
Wait.

We're still naked.
Might want to fix that before she comes back.
>>
>>33596890
Seconding this write in.
>"Detain him and give him some manner of care. Once I've got this fucking lead out of me, I want to interrogate him personally. If he croaks, you're all goddamn terrorists."
>>
>>33596942

>personally explain that to Gendo Ikari

I like this SO MUCH MORE than the Death threats.

Gives them a sense of the LEVEL of importance, and the cold knowledge that the goddamn King of NERV is on our side.
>>
>>33596890
>[]”Detain him and see to his injuries. I need to speak with him.”
Swear to disappear them personally if they fuck this up in any way. Then put pants on.
>>
Oh! Maybe Smith just has a mindslave implant in him. We just need to fish it outta his head and he'll be right as rain.
>>
>>33596992

Pants at least. We can get more after the medic patches us up.
>>
>>33596890
>>33596942
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aBSU4SBrNJU
This. Ye gods, this.
>>
>>33596942

>Threatening to Gendo someone

Pffftahaha. That's fucking great.
>>
>>33597013
If this happens I'm going to put my head through the double layered brick wall to my rear.
>>
>>33596994
>>33596942
Thirding.
>>
Oh fuck. This. >>33596942
Put the fucking fear of Gendo into 'em.
>>
>>33596890
>33596942

I normally just lurk this quest, but this write in is so hilarious that I feel the need to support it
>>
man, we need to apologize to Mari for being a cunt
>>
>>33597382
And for accidentally flashing our nuts while we were beating the fuck out of Smith (the cunt).
>>
>>33597411
very poor conduct indeed, hardly becoming of an officer and a gentleman.
>>
>>33597411
She probably enjoyed it.
Did that age limit bullshit finally get resolved?
>>
>>33597461
Yes. We don't romance any of the pilots.
>>
>Write-in.

“I'm holding you accountable for his containment and well being. If he disappears in ANY sense of the word, you get to personally explain that to Gendo Ikari,” you tell them, and they all swallow and nod. They roll you over off of Smith and begin bundling him out, leaving you face down on the floor. You feel someone standing over you, and it's probably Mari.

She kneels down next to you and places a hand on your side. “Are you okay?” She ventures, and you want to laugh.

“I'll be right as rain in a few days, Mari. Don't worry about me. Are you okay?” You ask her.

“Y-yeah. So like I was saying, maybe we should go see a mo-”

“I'd like to apologize,” you say at the floor, and to her, interrupting her statement before it goes places you don't want to think about.

“For what?” She sounds startled at the thought you want to apologize to her.

“For scaring you the other day. I was a prick about it, when I shouldn't have been. Now can you get out? I'm naked as the day I was born, for God's sake.” She giggles- fuck, that's horrifying, and leaves the room, closing the door once more. Standing, you find a pair of your undergarments and put them on, and then find a pair of pants. Shoes and socks are next, and you emerge from the trashed room, to find a medic waiting for you. He sits you down and looks over you.

“Well, you're extremely lucky. The bullets got caught between the titanium and your skin. I can go ahead and pull 'em out here, or you can wait for surgery later. What'll it be?”

[]”Pull 'em out here.”
[]”I'll wait for surgery, thanks. Just bandage me up and give me some morphine.”
[]Write-in.
>>
>>33597431
Indeed, we should also inform both NERV Nevada's base Commander of recent events (while we have clothes on ofcourse). Then we ought to see about getting transport for the EVA. Right now I don't care if we have to commandeer a pair of Frigates and a cargo ship.

We should also inform the Subcommander of recent events and our imminent arrival.
>>
>>33597461
Age of Consent in Japan is fifteen. All the pilots are currently underage and thus not legal.

It's not like you guys will live long enough to see any of them turn fifteen. World ends in January, 2016.
>>
>>33597461
No.
>>33597484
Why bother lying about something that can be easily verified?
>>
>>33597491
>[]”Pull 'em out here.”
Remove Kebab bullet now, reduce risk of infection.
>>
>>33597491
>[]”Pull 'em out here.”

>>33597484
I'd rather not, anyways
>>
>>33597491
>[]”Pull 'em out here.”
I've had worse.
>>
>>33597491
>[]”Pull 'em out here.”
>>
>>33597515
>Why bother lying about something that can be easily verified?
But...
>>33597512
>>
>>33597491
>[X]”Pull 'em out here.”
>>
>>33597491
>[x]Pull em out and wrap me up doc and be quick about it.
>>
>>33597491
>[x]”Pull 'em out here.”
Flex our abs, pop 'em out ourselves.
>>
>>33597543
Assaulting the Russian Embassy is also not legal. Didn't stop us. Most of what NERV does is wrong a level that surpasses legality, yet look at where we are. Frankly, I find it hilarious how wishy-washy Tang has been about the whole issue.
>>
>>33597602
I have been decisive on everything but this. If I want to waffle, I'm damn well going to waffle.
>>
>>33597602
Especially since he's an Asuka fan.
>>
>>33597602

Tang originally endorsed us going for Asuka. A large part of this is because a portion of the players are uncomfortable with the..... let's be diplomatic and call it the 'age gap'.
>>
>>33597617
asuka best girl

But she's not going to win just because I personally like her. That would make me a huge cunt. As OP, I might be a huge faggot, but I'm not a huge cunt.
>>
>>33597645
just a small one.
>>
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>>33597645
>>
>>33597616
This is probably the very worst thing you could waffle on. I'm generally of the opinion that QM should force a vote on if there will be a waifu and who it will be and then sticking to that vote. Letting the waifu'ers divide up into factions and fight it out just hurts the quest.
>>33597617
>>33597642
I thought he initially said we could go for whoever but that one of his friends was pulling for Asuka.
>>
>>33597642
>A large part of this is because a portion of the players are uncomfortable with the..... let's be diplomatic and call it the 'age gap'.

Frankly, I'm not even sure why people are even arguing for romancing young girls. I mean, why? Just why?
>>
>>33597491
>[]”Pull 'em out here.”

>>33597666
Aaaand saved.
>>
>>33597709
because NGE is best known for its "damaged goods" jailbaits as the adults are nuttier/less remarkable.
>>
>>33597709

I don't either.

Misato for waifu.
>>
>>33597645

Honestly? I think Asuka might be a best.

For Shinji.

If we could get the two of them over themselves for about five minutes and down to talking then it would help the overall situation a LOT.

Note, I'm not calling Shinji out or something. Sure he was a bitch sometimes, but considering what he went through, you can't really hold that against him. Same for 'ska.
>>
Rolled 26

I like Misato and Declan's Mother/Father dynamic for the kids, but as for a romantic intrest we'd need to hold on tight because Kaji might NTR us.

Fookin Japanese cunt
>>
>>33597753
>Misato for waifu.
Could've sworn he already said that's not happening unless we're down to share with Kaji.

Cryan's destined to spend the rest of his days with his dearest love, alcohol.
>>
>>33597769
Yeah, I think they'd be cute together if they got their acts together.
>>
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>>33597769
>>
>>33597799
No, Misato is still an option.
>>
>>33597808
Misato a shit
>>
>>33597793
DAMMIT STOP ROLLING
>>
>>33597816
Agreed, Lilith FTW
>>
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>>33597804
>>
>>33597808
then everythings good
>>
I don't really care, though expect to lose readers, but maybe that's for the better, more focus at the task on hand.
>>
>>33597835
Beat me to the punch.
>>
>>33597808
Does that mean you've changed your mind from thread 8 where you said:
>Kaji's the only man for her. Even if she doesn't like it.
>Unless you guys are into open relationships?

Because, in the end, that's the same as disallowing her. I'm just curious at this point since I'm shipping CryanXBooze.
>>
>>33597750

To be fair, the world ended and after the adults lived through THAT shit they were more or less forced to traumatize their own children so they could pilot the monster-robots powered by angst.

Then Gendo handpicked the most fucked up as to be able to better manipulate them.

>>33597804
>>33597835

Yeah, that's kinda what I meant. Yeah, he didn't exactly do fantabulis on some shit, but given that he was a random kid with little to no training he did a pretty goddamn good job.

You can't really hold his bitching out against him given his circumstances. He did about as good as he could possibly have done, all things considered.

That said, what we really need is to tell Lilith to bring back Mr Rogers and get him staffed as a Therapist at NERV. I'm like, 99.9 percent certain she can do that if we asked. And then we just let him do the talking while we do the punching.
>>
>>33597951
I'm allowed to change my mind.
>>
>>33597951
Silly, Cryan x Indian Motorcycle is best.
>>
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>>33597963
>That said, what we really need is to tell Lilith to bring back Mr Rogers and get him staffed as a Therapist at NERV. I'm like, 99.9 percent certain she can do that if we asked. And then we just let him do the talking while we do the punching.

But at what cost?
>>
>>33597951

He took that shit back hard not long after he made that comment. Like, ten-fifteen posts later he had officially redacted.
>>
>

“Pull 'em out here, Doc, and then give me some morphine.” He shoots you up first, which you're thankful for, and then begins working. Finally, he realizes the skin is meant to be peeled back from the armor, which then pops up to allow surgery, and which is all kinds of messed up you don't even want to think about what they did to you to make that possible.

He finishes, smacks a bandage on the holes, and then wraps that with athletic tape to ensure it stays put. “All done,” he declares. You thank him, and he wanders off, probably back to the lair of all doctors and medics, the Hospital Ward or infirmary or whatever they call it here in the US. Smith is probably being seen to for facial reconstruction from the working over you gave him, Mari is probably hiding because you're a scary cunt when you need to be, and you need to call the Subcommander in Tokyo-3 and see if he can get you 'alive' in the files again, because you want a fucking drink and you need to be able to show the pricks in the canteen your ID because of the USA's fucked liquor laws.

Well, at least you can feel good about your seven new scars. Traitor's exposed, kid's protected, nothing's exploded, and you only had to build ONE improvised explosive device. That hallucination of your mother, before the security guys showed up, though- the fuck is up with that?

You realize the morphine is making you weird, so you find a bench to slump down into. An email to Subcommander Fuyutsuki informs him of everything, requests backup, and a return to 'alive' for you on your file.

But you're left with questions. Why does Mari like you? You're nothing special. Why do people keep trying to kill you? How are the Evangelions cyborgs? What are the Angels, really? And, perhaps most importantly of all...

Why does NERV's choice in Musak suck so FUCKING BADLY?
>>
>>33598029
>Why does Mari like you?
Because family issues.
>>
>>33598029
And that's it for tonight, guys.

Thursday is next thread, as soon as I get in from my final exam, so hopefully around four pm central standard time.

Archive here:

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=tangfag

don't forget to vote!
>>
>>33598029
I wonder if Mari's Fetish is Shadowruns
>>
>>33598007
Must've been after I crashed out then.
>>
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>>33598076
Mine sure is!
>>
>>33598073
So that's what, little over 15 hours?
Nice.
>>
>>33598029
>Why does Mari like you?
Simple, we are the apparent best guy for her. Despite the fact that we're twice her age.

She's also fucked up and into being a sub apparently...
>>
>>33598073
Thanks for the run, both of the normal and shadow variety, and stay delicious but only with breakfast
>>
>>33598093

Dude, go back and check the very end of that thread. Dude showed up and wrote some funny shit about Cryan ignoring third impact.
>>
>>33598142
Will do.
>>33598073
Thanks for runnin' & g'night.
>>
>>33598142
I HIGHLY approve of that.
>>
>>33598073
Good thread, tangfag. Thanks for running.
>>
>>33598203

>Tang likes funny writeups.

Alright then, I guess I'll do another one.

>Cryan.
"Oh hey spooky dream bitch. I was wondering when you were gonna show up. Thanks for not wearing Mum's face this time."
>.... You're welcome. Listen, I wanted to talk about something....
"Is it about how I normally end up yelling at you?"
>Actually, no. It was going to be about playing games.
"Fookin' excellent. You wanna Tableflip rematch?"
>No, but-
"Goddamn right. I'm the table-flip champion of the univer-"
>Cryan, shut the hell up for a second and listen to me.
"Or what, you'll put on my Mother's face and try to seduce me."
>In your dreams.
"You mean where we are currently?"
>... Poor turn of phrase. Anyway, I think you have too harsh a view on games. They've been used as a tool for teaching for a long time. Think about the paintball incident, you disguised valuable lessons as fun. It keeps the training cycle active while disguising it as downtime.
"So you want me to teach the kids how to Operate? How the fuck do I disguise that as a game?"
>There's a game called Shadowru-
"I am not doing the Dungeoning or the Dragoning, so you can save you breath."
>I can give Misato sexy fantases about you.
"Well, at least you know my pricetag. Where do I acquire nerd gear, and how do I talk the brass into this?"
>Rei will develop an interest on her own, you just need to put on the slightest show of getting dragged in.
"Right. So how sexy are these fantasies of yours going to be?"
>Invest in Cialis stock.
"Fookin excellent."
>>
>>33598523
MOST EXCELLENT, FRIEND.
>>
>>33598523
>>33598627

".... Alright, well all I have to do is disarm the bomb, then Asuka and I just wait for our team to catch up and let us out."

"Yeah, Rei an' I already killed the mobsters, so all we need is you two to not blow up the package or yourselves and we have a successful run under our belt."

"Just to clarify, Shini's disabling the bomb?"

"Well, he's the Rigger with Explosives training, so I'm just gonna kick my magic ass back and let him finish saving the day."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence Asuka."

"If you get us killed I'm-" >Thunk "THE HELL?"

"DUDE, YOU'RE MAKING SHINJI DISARM AN ACTUAL BOMB?!?"

"He has a decent explosives skill, he gets plenty of hints if he rolls high."

"OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD!"

"THIS IS THE BEST FUCKING GAME EVER!"

"SHUT UP AIDA!"

"DUDE, THAT WAS MARI!"

>Cryan, we need to talk later about your teaching skills.
"Tick tock, Ikari."
>Doing Gendo's arm fold thing in no way diminishes our need to talk later.
>>
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>>33598720
You're doing God's work, Anon.
>>
>>33598720
>>33598786

>So Cryan, we need to tal- what are you doing?
"Setting up a Micro-brew."
>In Section 2 headquarters? Isn't that against regulations?
"Oh shit, better call the cops. Oh wait! I AM the cops. I'll be sure to get on that 'misuse of resources' citations sometime between 'never' and 'fuck you'."
>Why are you so.... difficult?"
"Because someone is inside my head irritates me. I like having my personal space."
>Indeed. There's a lot of ROOM up here."
"Oi, fuck you. Can't you pester someone else? Or actually HELP me?"
>How? Spy on people and give you intel?
"Nah, that means I'd have to trust you, and I doubt hallucinations are considered a viable witness in court."
>Then how should I help?
"Could you aim Mari's 'affections' somewhere else before she start humping my leg? How about Shinji, kid could use a pick-me-up."
>I will see what I can do.
>>
>>33598928
>Implying that Mari hasn't already attached herself to our backs with he gripping power of squid.
>Implying she would ever let go.

She is just one bad day from a Yandere...



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