Oi, boyz! A while ago, our Freeboota Krooza discovered a Spacey Hulk! Kaptin Krunch was grinnin ear to ear, and he went into da Hulk wit all the Nobs on the ship. It's been... I don't even know ow long, but we got no Boss, and we got no Nobs.Now, Some a da boyz propose a he-roic quest to find the Kaptin and see what's goin on inside dat Spacey Hulk. In da highly likely event dat the bigger boyz are all dead, I say da first boy to come back to da Krooza wit da best loot becomes da new Boss!Iffin you want to go into da Ulk, roll on dis ere table to decide what kind of boy you are (d20):1-2: Slugga Boy3-5: Shoota Boy5-6: Loota7-8: Stormboy9: Kommando10: Painboy11: Herda12-13: Mekboy14: Weirdboy15: Tankbusta16: Burna Boy17: Deff Dread18: Killa Kan19: Flash Git20: Gretchin (good luck)Now make sure you give yourself a suitably orky name for all yer posts.Roll on dis table for yer war paint and bonuses for da rolls (d6):1: Red (+1 for speed rolls)2: Black (+1 for defense rolls)3: Blue (+1 for evading damage)4: Yellow (+1 for ranged firepower)5: Purple (+1 for sneakin around)6: Green (+1 for melee strength)Then, roll on dis ere table to decide what part of da Hulk you'll be goin through (d6):1: The airlock at da top in what used ta be a Chaos Krooza.2: The big hole in the face of da Hulk, carved into a big rokk.3: Da open mouth of anudder Ork Krooza juttin out da port side of it.4: Them gun ports on the starboard side, what look like a big Oomie ship.5: Dat shiny fin-lookin piece a Eldar Krooza. Might be good luck.6: Da big hole we blasted into its stern, courtesy of Kaptin Krunch imself.Good luck boyz. Find da Boss, and if e's dead, just make sure ya don't get zogged by whatever did it!
I never done dis quest ting before, but I'll try it now to rescue our kaptin. Rolled a 12 (Mekboy), a 6 (Green), and a 4 (Starboard entry)I go by Chop'Shoppa, the choppiest, Lootiest Mek in dis whole krew, and I say I'll be da first to find the kaptin and our nobs, and whatever krumped em good!
>>34125262You find yourself crashin a boardin pod right through an Oomi-looking hull, right into the Hulk. Lookin around and gettin yer head on straight, you see the battery stations, or what used ta be dem, go off in two directions, to yer right or yer left. Which way do you go?
>>34125389If it's facin da way I tink it's facin, da Boss shoulda entered into da rear of da Hulk (or so the description implied). I'll go to my right, hopin I'll find da Boss, or at least what zogged him.(If I'm a Mek, do I get any kind of tech affinity for the machinery around me? There wasn't really a color for it.)
>>34125437You head down da battery line, noticin all the missing cannons and guns dat woulda been perfect fer lootin. After pasin troo the doorway and into a criss-crossing chamber, you have tree new options: Eider keep going forward troo the chamber, or jump down off da catwalk, onto da lower level, which presents two opposite directions dere as well. Steam pours from da grates below, but smells stagnant and wretched.(Not a bad idea. I'll think of something in the meantime)
>>34125522I'll keep goin forward on dis level.(what are my weapons, by the way?)
>>34125576(You have a choppa ax and a shoota. You can wield either with two hands, or one in each with a penalty to accuracy if you choose to do so. Many more weapons will be available as you go along. You're not as good at fighting as you are with engineering, but you can hold your own like a proper ork)You exit into a slanted, busted up ventilation chamber, with spiky bits all cobbled into the fans. A big central fan lies before you. None of them are operational.Roll a d20.
Rolled 7 (1d20)>>34125639Oi Squig, wot 'bout me?(8, 2, 2)
>>34126442I tink dat makes you painted black (dead 'ard with better defense), and you'll be enterin troo da big rokk lodged in the front of da HulkAlright 'Eadcruncha, you wanto to take a boardin pod to the entrance, or do you wanna take a deep breath and fly dere wit yer own jets?
>>3412503120, 6, 4.I am become dead, dyer of deaths.Let's see how long this poor chap lasts.
>>34126442Also, as I'm a forgetful squig, you've got a choppa axe and a simple shoota. Ugrades and looted weapons will come later. You can wield either weapon with both hands, storing the unused one, or you can duel-wield, losing some accuracy with both, but bein real choppy and shooty like a proppa ork.
>>34126553Alright, Dedd Grot, you're gonna hafta take a boardin pod to the starboard side of da Hulk, troo dat Oomie lookin piece. If Chop'Shoppa returns, you can join im.Because of your size, you can only take a choppa or a shoota. Bein painted green gives you better melee, but it's your call.
>>34126553Dedd Grot, I'ma need you ta roll a d6 to decide what battery port you crash troo. If you roll a 1, you's gonna crash right into Chop'Shoppa's pod.
>>34126553Da uva grots call me, OOGE CHOPPA.'cuz I bigger n meaner den dem uva grots.(Standing over half a foot taller than the average Gretchin, I am still fucking fucked.)I be taken dat choppa.
>>34126677Use dis cube wif dots!Dice+1d6
>>34126677(Spectacular fail, I rolled a die and got a 4.)
>>34126753Fail? you crash safely into a porthole, unharmed. The battery line extends to yer right and left. Prepare er choppa and pick a direction.
>>34126783Whoops, sorry. This is me. Forgot to type my name for it.
Oi, make sure you lot are puttin yer Ork names down so we can track you troo da Hulk.
>>34126783I was referring to my inability to use the 'dice+1d6'.Choppa take the right path. right means right 'n I always no right.
>>34126525Oi fink dat pod'd be da best bet. An' any good Ork knows da best dakka has choppy bits too, so da both of 'em.
>>34125031Oi! I'z da biggest Boy 'ere, so OI'Z should get da boss!I'z rolled a... sixteen an a... four, an, an, an... a foive!I'z Scorchtoof, da burniest Ork 'ere, an' Oi'z gunna find da boss!
>>34126843Goin down the side of da ship, you proceed troo da airlock and into a ventin chamber a sorts. You can eider go forward, back the way ya came, or jump down to a level beneaf you which is also a two-way path.
>>34126857Smart move, stormboy. You crash right into da rokk, through a makeshift airlock. When you exit yer pod, you find a carved-out asteroid base a sorts. Chitterin wit bolts and lectricity. From where ya landed, you can eider go forward to a windowed observation room, to yer left into a minin tunnel, or down a metal hall built into da rokk to your right.
>>34126968Oi's go fowards all brutally kunnin' loike.
>>34126906Alright Scorchtoof, you've got some yellow paint fer luck, and you'll be eadin to dat shiny Eldar-looking airlock at da top a da Hulk.For equipment, do ya want a shoota wit a small burna on it, a large bunra fer roastin enemy gits, or a choppa? You can also dual-wield da shoota and choppa, but da big burna's too big fer dat. (More upgrades and weapons will show up later, though)Also, do ya want to go in to da Hulk on a pod? Or do you wants us to fire you out of a cannon?
>>34126992As you go forwards, into the observashun room, you can look down troo da windows and see nuttin but pitch darkness. Except you kinda tink you see sumfin movin a level below. A flickerin light in da room means power's still on somewhere, and you might not want to stick around all obvious fertoo long. Roll a d20 to search around da room. Because yer a Stormboy wit good eyes, add +1 to da roll.
>>34127007Wot koinda question is that, Squig? Always choose da biggest burna! If anyfink gets close, Oi kin clobba dem wiff me Burma loik it were a klub. As fer da meens o' entry, take da pod - all dis non-breaff stuff 's bad fer skorchin'.
Rolled 1 (1d20)>>34127040Toime for some lootin.
>>34127079Haha. The light flickers and goes out, leavin you blind save fer da light back da way you came. More skitterin in da rock walls could give you some spookin, but you've got three options. Da Orky option of going back da way you came and pickin another route fer lootin and cunnin brutality; da Looty route of bumpin around the room in da dark (roll another d20, but subtract 3 from the result) to see if you can find somefin useful; or da Orky Looty route of crashin troo da window, guns blazin into da darkness!
>>34127007Oi fink yous meant da kannon dere, Squig.>>34127138Krump it! Dat fing down dere turned off der loight! It probably 'as some flash gear.
>>34127052All dis boardin safety is makin me ashamed and proud at da same time! Alright, your pod slams into da Fin-lookin fin, catchin you wit all a GorknMork's lucky tuffness. Fallin troo da airlock, you find yerself in a gloomy, but semi-glittery Eldar-styled chamber.A loud rumble and some flickers echo around da room every few moments. You don't feel any people nearby, and you've got three doors around you. On behind you, one to yer right, and one in front of you. You can't see anything werth lootin in the empty chamber.
>>34127185Yer goin into da darkness? Roll anuver d20, but add +2 fer bein Ard an Orky.
>>34126920Oi don' fink Oi sur-survi- not get crumped make'n dat jump dere. Oi fink forward is da best option, yea!
Rolled 5 + 2 (1d20 + 2)>>34127211Waaaaagh!
>>34127189Well, now fee some good ol' Orky in-too-ishun ter figure out where da zog da boss went. First, light me siggar an' take a puff. Now, let's see... Da boss is da boss cause 'e's not afraid ter go straight forward at da runtz an clobba 'em, but da boss is also kunnin' and might try terr go around em all sneeky loik... But he's da boss, an' da boss is always flight, so Oi'll go ROIGHT!
>>34127223Alrighty Choppa, you go into a dank chamber what useta have big fans movin air throughout da ship. Dey'z ain't movin no more, and da room looks all warped from being Space Hulked wit all de udder stuffs and rokks. Dere'z only one door up a staircase ahead of ya, and a big ole in the wall to yer left. You can go troo eider a doze, unless you want to roll a d20 fer lootin.
>>34127274Da boss is always roight, ravver. Dunno where "floight" came from.
>>34127291S'if dere any uvva way, Squig!dice+1d20
Rolled 4 (1d20)>>34127314Oi fink dis, grot is outta whack!
>>34127243Waaagh!!!You blast troo da window, glass sparklin and shatterin all over da place. You land in da middle of the room, and yer Orky senses kick in wit yer Waaagh!!! You sense someting moving, stumbling towards ya. Yer not quite off guard, but you can barely react in time. Roll a d20 fer yer reflexes and get dat choppa ready fer meleein sneeky gits!
>>34127274You burst troo da right path, into a small closet. Lookin up, you notice a window in da roof is cracked and ready to blast you into space!You can roll a d20 fer lootin da room, but dat glass don't look loike it'll last much longa.
Rolled 16 (1d20)>>34127339Rollin ta krump!>>34127314Yous puts da rolly fings in da e-mailz binz, den press der buttonz, ya git!
Rolled 18 (1d20)>>34125031'Ol roight! Let's see Wot I Geht!
>>34127314>>34127331Ya can't really find one. It be possible dat somefin loike a door lies behind any of da collapsed crates, but nuttin you can do about any a dem roight now bein a grot an all.
Rolled 4 (1d6)>>34127381
Rolled 4 (1d6)>>34127381(Should I use /tg/ Dice, or my own dice)
>>34127381Awesome, you got a Kan! Roll a d6, then another one for color bonuses and entry to the Hulk.
>>34127372Zog me, dis dun look good. Roight, I'z gunna flip down me visah, grab ontah megas can so Oi'z kin blast meself back to da door if da glass breaks. Den, Oi'z gunna grab whoteva I can an' get da zog outah dis closet.
Rolled 4 (1d20)>>34127421Use the TG dice, because you're a killa kan, haha. Nice roll.
>>34127422Ol' ready donn Mistah!Stompy' AND Shooty! WWWWAAAAGGGGGHHHHHH!
Rolled 7 (1d20)>>34127428Bah, dis doice is brokin'.
>>34127396Well, dat is well 'n troo-ly squig shit. Oi look aroun' da tunnel 'n take da exit fur-vest from da entry point.
>>34127422Sorry, I didn't see the next two rolls. Alright, you got a Yellow-painted (shooty) kan and you'll be launchin to dat Oomie side of da Ulk, right behind Chop'Shoppa (no Idea where he went) and Big Choppa. Maybe you can give dat Grot some backup.As a Kan, you can pick a shooty loadout (yer bonus) a choppy loadout (some saws) or a burny loadout. Combine any into yer two arms if you want, but not all three (not yet at least).
>>34127475Oil' take a Shooty on me Left, und a Choopy on me Roight!
>>34127373You react quickly, catchin the clumsy, Oomie-shaped fing right in yer Choppa. With ease, you bat da ting away. It moans, bored, as it collapses to da ground. You still can't clearly see what it is, but you can see a tunnel to yer left or straight forward. Or you can try to feel around and loot dis room, too (d20).
>>34127450You find 5 Oomie-shaped teef! Not porppa teef, but not a bad start fer lootin. The room is still devoid of valuable stuff, but the glass isn't borken, so you're safe to go back to the central chamber.
Rolled 1 (1d20)>>34127508Oi gives da stoopid 'umie a taste of my dakka, den Iz loots da room
>>34127433>>34127469Alright, da furvest is dat staircase. It's not too tall, and da door moves outa yer way juss fine, but you get da feelin dat dere's people round ya. Openin da door, you see a barracks wit beds, chests, and maybe some loot (rolla d20 if you want ta loot. Add +1 to the roll because you can access under the bunks, and another +1 because the light is fully on, somehow).
>>34127549Why da zog would doze pointy-eared grots store teef as toiny as dis? Roight, I'z goin' da sentrul way dis toim, wiff me Burna at da ready!
>>34127506You get strapped to a boardin pod, and fired at the starboard side of da Hulk. Roll a d6 to see which porthole you crash inta.
>>34127561You can't find nuttin in da room wit a roll loike dat. In fact, yer stumblin knocks over a large box, nearly krumpin yer noggin, and making it harder to move to yer left. You doubt you can squeeze through wit yer jets, so flyin back up to da observashun room or goin forward on dis level are yer best bets.
Rolled 2 (1d6)>>34127587Why'd dey haveta nail me inerr! i betsa ders enuff space inside da pod fer me!Oh Wait'er second, I'mma Kan.
Rolled 2 (1d20)>>34127578Oi want to climb da nearest bunk 'n check da joint out. See if oi can sneak up 'n crump some oomies, or rather, yea!Den I want ta loot da room.(Could I hear Killa kan, crash into our side of the hulk?)
>>34127615Krump it! Oi heads forwards.
>>34127584Loights flicker again as you enter da big room, and the rumblin stopped, You see a oomie-like figure in da distance, coming from da forward door. And anudder! Dis one comin from behind you. Yer bein flanked by slow-movin, sick-lookin Oomies! You think you can attack one of dem before de udder gets inta melee range (requires another d20), or maybe anudder stratagem fer afight wit dees oomies.
>>34127620You crash right between da two udder pods used by da udder Orks. Kicking yer way out, you see two ends of the battery line, a path to yer right, and a path to yer left. Which one do you pick?>>34127622You can climb up, and yes, you easily feel the rumble and hear the crash of Gutz Cracka' as he slams into the outside of the Hulk.
>>34127633Barrelin forward troo da cramped hall, you swear you can hear more noise behind ya, but you can also see more light ahead a ya. In moments, you push through a rusty door and into a wet turbine station, hollowed out by Warp and foightin, ya think. Dere are skeleton bones a Oomies on da floor, and a few boxes all over da place. Roll a d20 to see if anytin good is inside em.
Rolled 18 (1d20)>>34127653'Oomies all around, eh? Toim ter do my seekret move! Oi'll give her a hint fee shot it's loik: dere's lots o' spinning an' lots o' fire!
>>34127676I Take the Roight Path, Da Boss would've taken the Roight Path.I 'ope I don't find anything mean Nobz, 'cept da Boss of Course!
Rolled 15 (1d20)>>34127700
>>34127676Bein' a grot, 'n all, does dis startle me?If not I wnt to clmb up 'n look around.Den if it's clear; LOOTY TIME!
>>34127707Now dat's a proppa roll! You spin out, sending flames all over da place. Da Eldar walls don't burn, but da Oomies sure do. Dey halt dere advance, but don't scream like normal Oomans burnin. Smell worse, too. Dey collapse a few feet away, curlin up like bonfires.
>>34127714You fond some proppa loot now! Got yerself two Krak Grenades and a cask of fuel fer yer jets, in case ya need em. Da turbine has a big hole in it froward, if you want to keep goin dat way.
>>34127711You follow da roight path, and stumble into a vent chamber. A catwalk lies before ya, and a lower level under dat, venting some nasty fumes. Ya can ere some movement forward, but you might be too evy to walk it. Roll a d20 if you want to proceed.
>>34127720I'm removing all yer basic fears cause you'd ave to be crazy fearless and dedd ard to go to dis Ulk what may have killed da Boss anyhow. You need to see somefin really terrible before you get spooked.Roll a d20 and add 1 fer Lootin da barracks.
>>34127741Somefing ain't right 'ere, 'Oomies don't act loik dat, an' Oi don't fink dem Eldar gitz'd let da sistums on dey're ships let Oomies in, even after dis long. Maybe dat chaos-ey part 'as somefink ta do wiff dis...Roight, back to da sitch-oo-ay-shun! Is dere any loot in 'ere? Any signs dat da Boss moight've been 'ere? Maybe an 'ole dat looks loik flashy bitz would a been dere, but a big, green Boss might've ripped out?
Rolled 11 (1d20)>>34127788Zog it! UI'mma Kan! I KAN do emmyfing!
Rolled 15 + 1 (1d20 + 1)>>34127807Oi use me sneaky, grot skillz to loot dis barracks, good 'n proppa!
Rolled 19 + 1 (1d20 + 1)>>34127807(I have to go to the shops, if this thread is still up n 30 minutes, I'll jump right back in. Mind taking over for the next bit Narrator?)
>>34127830Doos dat' mean I don't haveata run away from danga? (Referencing Lexicanum with the whole 'Killa Kans have run away from the first sign of danger')
>>34127830Accordin to da map, you're da furvest from where da Boss' last signal came from, far below you. One a de udder two doors in dis room should lead down, or you'll just affta break da floor or sumfin.No Loot still, but you can always search da burnt corpses and take dere teefs.
>>34127857I was planning on shutting it down for the night in the next half hour, but I'll control your guy until then/you return. I definitely want to pick this up tomorrow if you guys are okay with that (Another fa/tg/uy is also welcome to take this over while I'm gone, too).But for your roll, you find Two Lasguns! You can carry both on your back, but can't dual-wield with yer choppa.
>>34127876Right... Dem 'Oomie teef 'd be no good, dey're all burnt up from me speshul move. Oi'll go left dis toim, seein' as dese Eldar walls 'n stuff kan't get burned up fer shortcuts.
>>34127840>>34127866I never knew Kans did that. Your fears are up to you.You just barely manage to scamper forward, da Catwalk collapsing behind you (You and Choppa can no longer go back that way). You shuffle into a big ventilation room with large, inoperable fans. It looks mashed into itself as a part of da Spacey Hulkification wit udder ships. You can go through a gaping tunnel in the wall to your left, and there's a staircase leadin to a barracks ahead of you with a trange little grot lootin around it (the stairs don't look like they could support your weight). You can also try to loot this room, or knock around the crates to see if there's anyfing behind em.
>>34127945'Oi! You! Ya lookin' fer da Boss too?'
>>34127925Bustin troo da door, you find a winding, warped-out passageway what used ta be a stairwell. Da upper stairs looks smushed down by gravity, but you tink you can go down if you want. Dere's still de udder room behind ya, or you can start goin down if ya want.
Oi' Squig is et too layte for this ork to join en' on the lootin'?Those Boyz are gunna need me stabby implehments sooner or lahter.Rolled: 10,1,3
>>34127964One adda Kans, I'm Safe!Yeah, I be lookin fer da Boss! E's not round ere, but I foundsome Oomie flashlights what we can use ta find im!
>>34127966Oi'z gunna check da uvva rooms first, just ta make sure.Awlso, Oi'd look ter make a mark on da wall to let ovva boyz know dat oi landed roight near 'ere.
>>34127769Roight, does Oi 'ave one a dem map fings? Lets 'ead tru dat 'ole, propa kunnin' loike.
>>34127968Not at all. I won't end tonight's seshun until me eyes can't open no more.Yer a Fast Painboy! Dat's kinda awesome. You'll be landin yer boardin pod in the piece a Ork Krooza lodged in da Hulk's port side. Roll a d6 to see what part of da Krooza Bitz you crash inta.
Rolled 6 (1d6)>>34128016roight then! WAUUUUGH!
>>34127987'Eh! Grough! Get up here! Left's go Huntin'!'(By that, I mean I'm trying to hitch him a ride on my armor) 'I say we go true dat tunnel over dare! Seems loike da only way out from 'eer'
>>34128016Whoops, forgot to say Narratin in my name. Whatever, you guys know it's me.>>34128000Dat's good tinkin. Roll a d20 fer da hecka it, and add +5 fer style because yer Brutally cunnin>>34128009You barge into da ole, and find anudder Oomie figure walking slow-like. He turns to greet ya wit a dum spression, and you notice he don't look like any Oomie you fought fore. Looks all diseased and spooky, like meat you wouldn't even feed to a squig, yafinks. He's turnin to rush you melee, but yer fasta. Make yer attack or whatever ya wantta do. You also notice this room's got a higher cieling, bout three stories above. You can fly up if you want.
>>34128009(pretty much exhausted, going to check to see if the thread is up in the morning, till then, night OP)
Rolled 5 + 5 (1d20 + 5)>>34128058Oi'z got me own flare, Oi do... Now, mark which way is shot, an...
>see this thread>get excite>already this far inEmperor damnit! I was pumped.
>>34128054Sounds like some cunnin brutality ta me (Choppa finds some stability enough to have both Lasguns ready fer a foight. He now counts as an addition to your gear, and you can fire his lasguns at will or let him off you whenever you want. I'll be honest, this is the best Master Blaster teamup I've seen).You crash through da tunnel, sputtering metal scrap and sparks everywhere, and eventually the two of you squeeze into a long hallway wiff more doors, like a residential block of a Oomie ship. Roll 1d20+5 for your next encounter.
>>34128101Don't worry man, you can join tomorrow, OR you can roll up your character now and do it with us tomorrow!
Rolled 1 + 5 (1d20 + 5)>>34128112(Oh Jesus YES! It's like if a Mini-Me Dreadnaught had a Turret Gun!)Wot's dat?
Rolled 19 + 2 (1d20 + 2)>>34128114Deal, Rollin' for da orkiest ork to play tomorrow
>>34128101It'll be kon-tin-you'd termorrah.All did sed, we'z still dunno whot'z goin' on in dat Chaos-y bit.
>>34128141OH FUCK! I'M PANICING. /tg/ dice, you fail me once again!
Rolled 4, 2 = 6 (2d6)>>34128148Shit, okay so I'm a Flash Git, now what about the other two (didn't know you couldn't roll two types of dice)
>>34128153Zog it all! cahn't you gitz at least wait tull I can reach ya' before gettin' use selfs krumped!?!
>>34128166Wow, you actually got a Paint that helps your Role. Lucky.
>>34128070Night. Remind me you're about to fight another zombie tomorrow.>>34128076You mark it pretty well, enuff fer Orks to know which way is down, and dat yer leadin da way troo dis Eldar ship. If you go troo da next room, roll a d20 fer anuvver encounter.>>34128101You're more than welcome to roll an Ork fer da Hulk. I think we have enough time to get you on da Hulk before I shut down.>>34128026Alright Painboy, you crash very close to da Core of da Hulk, wiff much of da Krooza behind where you land. Out of yer pod, you find yerself in a kontrol room fer da Herdas. You see dead squigs all over da place in dere cages, but no Boyz. Dere's a hole in da wall behind you, anuvver hole before you, and a door no one used to yer right.
>>34128182'E prob'ly won't get any good loot, 'cause 'e's going inter a Rokk.>>34128197Dese grots're gunna know who ta fear!
>>34128166Okay, I is a the dakka-est FlashGit. Name is what I'll have next thread and I'll be lookin in da big 'ol hole, sure as sure it's a cunning sign from Mork (or is it Gork?)
>>34128216Which'eva ones more Kunnin'.
Rolled 18 (1d20)>>34128213...Zog me, dese doice're broke.
>>34128197Alright OhPee, I iz lookin in dat big 'ole. What I find?
>>34128197Rioght then!'irst thangs 'irst I grasp me anes-stesh-sha aplichator (Large Mallot.) and me shoota and call out to mah surrodins' "ANY BOYZ 'EROUND 'ER NEED SUM HEALIN?" as loudly as me orky lungs will allow, I also Prep to leg it if needs be.
>>34128166Cool, looks like you'll be crashin in after Eadcruncha in the Rokk. Come up wit yer name whenever you want. For yer gear, while I won't stop you from taking a choppa, you can start off with a Big Shoota if you want, and bonuses for shootiness with yer yellow paint scheme.>>34128141ALL of the doors along the wall burst open. Four sick-lookin Oomies skulk out into da open, lumbering towards you, but also a weird greenish blob monster. It's small, but seems to rumble with some sort a Weirboy majick. You have first shot with your shootas or lasguns, but they're closing in on you.>>34128152Goodnight
Rolled 5 + 2 (1d20 + 2)>>34125031ERE WE GO
Rolled 1, 3 = 4 (2d6)>>34128271Lesse how I look and where I go
>>34128262Wot? I nevva said OI, wuz done, just tellin' dat git dat 'e kin sign up termorrah if 'e wants.I bettah not be done, aftah whot Oi rolled.
>>34128284>3: Da open mouth of anudder Ork Krooza juttin out da port side of it.OI!
>>34128228You get attacked by a strange green blob! It's got some orns in it like one a dem Chaos demons or somefin. It misses you by an inch, and you have da drop on it wit yer burna. Roll fer yer attack on dis weird ting.
>>34128262Me name's Flashzzap Goldtoof, Da flashiest FlashGit in da hes-toor-ee of ork. I fink I see signs of anoffa ork goin through, where can I go?
Rolled 7 (1d20)>>34128298Blob? Betta hope did fing is somefin' burna-bull!
Rolled 16 (1d20)>>34128262I Blast it roight in Propa! If I can, Lasgunz und me Big Shoota! If not, Big Shoota! Fill da Hall wiff lead!If they get close, start Slashin' 'em up!(I'm gonna Roll, even if you haven't told me yet)
>>34128246You find Eadcruncha's pod. Dere's a windowless, dark observation room ahead of you, a mining tunnel in da rokk to yer left, and a metal tunnel to yer right, into da rokk wall.>>34128251You ere some scuffling behind you (front of da Krooza), and some ahead of you, but no sounds behind da door. If dey were proppa orks, dey's reply quickly. You sense somefing is wrong.>>34128294Roll another d6 to see which part of da exposed Krooza you land in. If it's a 6, you'll land right nextto da Painboy.
>>34128335Good roll, Big Choppa lasguns da first Oomie roight in da noggin, and e goes roight down proppa. Yer shoota fires wildly, but clips da next two Oomies. Dey stay standin, and move at ya. Ya get one swipe wit yer saws before da two Oomies get a swip atacha.
>>34128346'If 'use Not Orky Iz Krump 'ya good 'ya hear!?!"I Prepz me Mallot for Krumpin' and keep My shoota switchin' to both openings preparin' to light up wat evea comes throogh.
>>34128320Yer burna scorches it, but it squigles, still alive. A putrid stench crops into da room. It tries ta move past ya, towards da Oomie corpses. You get a d20 to intercept -1 for it bein quick and the sickening stench of it.
>>34128346Iz is checkin da minin' tonnel, Da boss is krump'd and I needz to find me somfin flashy so iz can show da Boys I iz da flashiest so I iz new Boss.
>>34128394You can ere shufflin movement. Sounds like Orks, but still not really loike em. You've got a chance to move outa da room, but if you choose to stay still, you need to roll a d20.
Rolled 10 (1d20)>>34128407Oh no ya don', Oi killed em, fair an' square, so OI gets tah do whot Oi wants to em!
>>34128413Da minin tunnel seems half-finished. You find a big drill wedged into da wall, with bloody footsteps escaping it, and a dead skeletal Oomie hangin off da machine. Roll a d20 to loot da site.
Rolled 12 (1d20)>>34128392WWWWWAAAAUUUUGGGGHHHHH!!!!
>>34128432Iz kinda 'opin this git would roll>>34128294to see eff he links up or not nut i might just conziduh legin' itAlso i was considering this being my current gear:1. shoddyily made shoota2. one anes-stesha Mallot3. bag 'o' HEALIN' GUBBINS (Random scraps for healin light wounds.)
>>34128439+1 for Orky banter. You succesfully incinerate the fiend. It stops moving, dead in its tracks, and seems to completely evaporate wit yer burna, some green-white fire along wit yer good-ol orange burnin. Afterwards, deres no trace of it. Roll a d20 +2 to loot da room it was in.
Rolled 13 (1d20)>>34128458Lets see wat De's oomies left ol' Flashzzap
>>34128459You chop one Oomie in da chest, ripping it in half, but da second Oomie rushed you, trying to slash at you. For some reason, da fourth Oomie does nothing while the mysterious blob rushes towards da downed bodies. Roll 1d20 for ardness to zombie melee, and anudder 1d20 for Choppa getting a lasgun shot off while you get lunged at (choose a target for him)
Rolled 4 + 2 (1d20 + 2)>>34128475Roight, let's see whot you'z was hidin'...
Rolled 1 (1d20)>>34128496Tuffness test
Rolled 1 (1d6)>>34128346>Roll another d6 to see which part of da exposed Krooza you land in. If it's a 6, you'll land right nextto da Painboy.Go Doice, GO!
>>34128474You might as well wait for him to roll a landing point. Backup could be useful. Your gear sounds perfectly fine. Sorry I completely forgot to give you your options earlier.>>34128477You find dat you might be able to tear off da drill for spinny choppy, if you so wanted. No flash, but da Oomie as some shiny teefs to pull out, and you see four shimmering gemstones near the corpse, left behind in whatever happened.
>>34128544Zog it all!>>34128546Well itz time for me to leg it through the door behind me that no ones opened!
Rolled 15 (1d20)>>34128496Fuck my life on that last one btw, and this one is for the Lasgun, on the Guy attacking me, if I can't, then to the Oomie mukin' about.
>>34128515You find an Eldar shrine, or what used to be one. It smells nasty and looks corrupted as hell. A three-circled image with outward arrows is scrawled in blood on da wall. Da gear is all desecrated, but you do find a Fire Dragon Flamer Piston, which you tink you can strap onto your Burna (+2 damage to armor, but -1 flame spread).
>>34128550Iz a FlashGit, I can Krump anyfin wif just dakka...Howeva, me has a brutally kunnin plan. Can iz pull of da spinny drill and add it to da front of me Big Shoota? Like dem oomies wif dere bay-ohh-net? If not, I Krump da dead oomie's 'ead in for muckin about and take me dem flashy stones.
>>34128544>>34128564Somehow, dis sickly Oomie slams into yer arm, knockin yer joint off balance and makin you take a -2 penalty for yer Big Shoota. Luckily, Choppa blasts da Oomie's ead off wit a laser, stoppin it from doin more damage. Da forth Oomie finally moves on ya, but dat Green blob reaches a downed Oomie, glowin sickly green and fusin wit it or somefin.Da glowy Oomie corpse gets back up, eadless and all! It jiggles wit some weird power! You can eider attack da dull Oomie, da glowy Oomie, or leg it outta dere!
>>34128591Oi'll stuff da bit in me pack, just in case Oi foind somethin' that needs PROPPA burninatin'. Y'know whot, Oi fink dat symbol fing is fer one o' dem Chaos fingies, Oi dunno. Maybe sum'n on the Krooza'z got an oidea 'bout dis?[Ruffling around in my pack to see if I brought comms equipment. If not, go down the staircase from earlier.]
>>34128640>or leg it outta dere!Oi'd suggestLEEEEEEEG IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT
>>34128546Oo, you land way off from da Painboy, directly into da bow face of da Krooza, some ways behind da Painboy in da center of da craft. Behind you is da void a space. You tink, if dis is anyfing like our Freeboota Krooza, you're below da Kaptin's Bridge. You can try to scrounge around the ruined room you just crashed into, maybe find a ladder up to da bridge, or use da door to your left to see what's outside.>>34128561Openin da door, you find a grot, cowerin in da corner. Eh doesn't seem to regard you, and shivers from da light.
>>34128687>You can try to scrounge around the ruined room you just crashed into,Gonna loot me some bitsThey best be red bits
>>34128664>>34128640I ain't a Git loike you Loota! WAAAUUUUGGGGHHHHH!!!I rush BOTH OF THEM! Spinnin' and Sawin'!(I think Kans can Spin like Dreads, right?)
>>34128687"Oi dis no time for dat now ya git we got some fioghtin' to do!" I yellz to the grot while i seal teh door behindz me"Lookz Liek Leggin' it won't 'elp after all." I lomment as I prepar' to fioght my way outz.
>>34128608You can take da loot, but rolla d20+2 for drill bayonet. You may nit be a mekboy, but you're cerainly brutally kunnin.>>34128660Forgot to mention that you guys can try to comm da Krooza at any time, but it might not always work (roll a d12), and you can talk to da udder Freebooterz about stuff or try to figure out where you are in relation to de udders or da Boss.Going down da staircase, you see a door of a more Oomie design crashed into the stariwell, but da Eldar archiekture continues further down another level, into an open Eldar hole in da wall. So basically, do you's wants to go down one level or two?
Rolled 3 (1d20)>>34128727
>>34128711You find 8 Ork Teefs of decent size and 2 Snotling Teefs of meager size. you also find 2 Magazines of Shoota Ammo, which can apply to yer Loota. Finally, crammed into a komputer, you find a Tellyporta Beacon. Might come in handy later, especially on a Spacey Hulk.>>34128727Hell yeah, you can spin. Roll a d20+2 against the nearer glowy Oomie, then a d20 against the Oomie rushin you. Choppa won't be able to fire is guns wit you spinnin, though.
Rolled 7 (1d20)>>34128745Hrumph. Well, konsiderin' dat we've got da ovvas searchin' da Oomie-lookin' places, Oi should stick wiff da Eldar lookin' places fer now. Oi shud prob'ly make one o' dem map fings so'z Oi don't get lost.>If I have to roll to make a map, this is for it!
Rolled 20 + 2 (1d20 + 2)>>34128793for the Glowy Oomie!
Rolled 4 + 2 (1d20 + 2)>>34128745GorkaMorka give us ya Brutal Kunnin!
>>34128732Oi! Wha!? Ain't no talkin wit Gubbinz like you! What you want!? Ain't got no words no more to speaks wit you! You can't be no dok! Can't be!(The grot is clearly out of is mind. You can't tell ow long e's been in dis Krooza, but likely while it was bein turned into a Spacey Hulk. If you want to try and clear up is madness wit drugs in yer kit, or a good knock on is head, roll a d20.)
>>34128811...Dat Oomie got fragged ter zog.
>>34128793(Should we take that 3 I rolled, I just rolled it assumin' I would need to. Or should I roll again?)
>>34128793>You find 8 Ork Teefs of decent size and 2 Snotling Teefs of meager size.IM DA RICHEST BOY ON DIS SHIP!> you also find 2 Magazines of Shoota Ammo, which can apply to yer Loota. Finally, crammed into a komputer, you find a Tellyporta BeaconToime to find da udder boyz and show em da fancy new tellyporta I got meself>"OI LADS>WHERE ARE U?!"
>>34128777I'll count that 3 roll for Choppa missing an attempted lasgun before you spin.You fucking nail that glowy Oomie, shredding it so cleanly that it sends glowy bits all over the hall, AND right into the oncoming dull Oomie, slicing is edd clean off. Da glowy oomie turns to gree burna, and vanishes into nothingness, weirdly.
>>34128811zogged him right in da gabber
Rolled 2 (1d20)>>34128827"Zoddin Snap outa 'et we got bigga problems!">I give 'em the good 'ol bump on the noggin' to stahp speakin' lioke a weirdboy.
>>34128800Yeah, you can scrawl a map if you want. Take a 20 on it if you want to record all you've done so far.I also should mention that I'm passing out where I am. I'm gonna take my leave here. Just wanted to get through the first Zombie/Nurgling encounters. That said, if anyone else wants to take over as QM, you're more than welcome to.
>>34128855Ow! Dere ya go urtin me like dem silent Boyz. I knew you wasn't a real Dok!
>>34128897I thinl we can wait till next thread just give us time 'und will be therethis is really fun
>>34128850I wiggle me Shootas and Frown, saying 'Choppa, ya know how ta fix me arm? it's a bit shtiff, it is.'And I'll leave it off from there for Choppa himself to pick it up.Any specific time you want to start Squig? I have a party going on tomorrow, but I 'fink' i can participate. I hope.
>>34128897See yah, Squig.I say we stop here and resume tomorrow.
Alright guys, I'm out for today. This was fun. Hope to see you back here tomorrow.
Should we archive this?
>>34128933Oi sholl be dere
Rolled 3 + 2 (1d20 + 2)>>34128826'imma gonna say I iz break da drill...me Kunnin got me in trouble it seems
>>34128933>>34128945You'z gots my burna.
>>34128926>>34128922>>34128927Work might get in the way for me in the evening, but I'll be on around 1 or 2 (Eastern US time) in case you're on. I'll definitely be on tomorrow night after 10 like I was tonight.
>>34128970Yeah, you can't quite get it to work on your shoota. It can still be used on its own as a two-handed melee weapon, but not as powerful as your big shoota and it can't latch on unless you somehow find a mekboy. If you choose to keep it in your inventory, you might be able to use it to break through some walls in the Hulk.>>34128943I have no idea how one goes about doing that, but I'd love it if this got archived.
>>34128975>AutoDin dis painboy will be der.
Rolled 9 + 2 (1d20 + 2)>>34129000Cool cool, keepin' it. Muh stuff1. Big Shoota2. Gold Teef3. Minin' Drill.