It is without further ado that I announce this meeting of the Fighters Guild open, yes there is a dire bear running amok in the kitchen, anyone that wants to go slay it is welcome to but we can't delay anymore. The main topics we are discussing today are as follows:The potential merits of forming an alliance with the Barbarians Guild.How do we deal with the problem of the mages guild not paying us enough for the alchemy ingredients we got for them.What equipment should be standard issue for new recruits.Helmets, yes or no.And the benefits of specializing in unarmed combat, other than to annoy Monks.Now then, shall we begin comrades?
>>36041499Also whoever stole the head armorer's hammer is to give it back or we'll let him find out who did it himself, this will also include him delivering punishment, don't forget what he did to the last guy that happened to.
Has anyone seen the new recruits from Grentock lately? They set out looking for furs last week
>>36041499Ah, another meeting's on, then? >The potential merits of forming an alliance with the Barbarians Guild.Better to have them fighting with us than against us, I'd say. If this keeps up we could get communication between all the martial guilds and actually make progress on improving things.>How do we deal with the problem of the mages guild not paying us enough for the alchemy ingredients we got for them.The Mage's Guild can be uncooperative at times, just speak to either one of the Bureaumancers or Currencymancers and they'll get proper payment sorted out. Failing that, ask for Anfarthon and tell him Xafras sent you, he's an old friend of mine.>What equipment should be standard issue for new recruits.Standard issue? We're fighters, we have as many fighting styles and weapons as you can imagine! New recruits should be given a weapon that best reflects their path of training.>Helmets, yes or no.Only for beings without horns, it gets rather inconvenient when I try finding a helm to fit my head.>And the benefits of specializing in unarmed combat, other than to annoy Monks.Well, you're never caught defenseless.
why do fighters take better care of and style their beards better than wizards?
>>36041499>Helmets, yes or no.Mmmmrp. Mrp phrph ph mrrrph.
>>36042236>>The potential merits of forming an alliance with the Barbarians Guild.>Better to have them fighting with us than against us, I'd say.Yes and when we've had jobs with them in the past, they usually charge in first and at least half always get slaughtered by traps and what not. Rather convenient, I'd say. Never too many left over to have to split the loot with.Also has anyone else found it strange they were able to organize and form a guild?
>>36042261Likely because our facial hair isn't regularly burnt off in pyromancy accidents.>>36042480Hey, if the Thieves of all people formed a guild, any class can. I'm glad for it, since it's the only way they're going to get representation in the civilized world.
>>36042142Those greenhorns? They'll be lucky if they come back alive, if at all.Now, for the matter at hand...Barbarians and fighters should be united, and I've always said as much.. They're a nice bunch, and they can hold their own on a fight. Take my cousin, goes for Anqhor the Boody these days. Back when he was just Rob, we tried to get him in therapy for that anger problem he has, but it turns out it's making him good nowadays!Mages are a pain in the ass, and this can't stand anymore, but we must recognise they'd sweep the floor with us if we went for a direct confrontation. Hold your groaning and mumbling, gentlebeings, but I think the solution is very simple: we won't take any jobs until they pay what they owe. In short, an embargo.Recruits should get some light armor at first. Get their bearings, learn to move, etc, and then they can learn how to fight in more restrictive clothing. I'm thinking leather or something similar. In terms of weapons, let 'em choose which weapon to specialise in, but we can't afford to give out anything above the most basic of qualities. You know how the treasure is after the city made us pay for the collateral damage our last brawl caused.Helmets yes. Unless you don't want a helmet. Who are we to decide wether people should wear helmets or be total dumbasses?And isn't annoying monks enough benefit in and on itself? Unarmed combat classes? Yes please!
>>36042480note that they are almost always led by eitherA) the biggest, strongest and meanest slab of meat there isorB) some batshit insane, shroomsmoking druid, shaman or witch doctororC) a godtime to go mode:all of the above
>>36042517>he thinks that the Thieves Guild existshaha wow what a crazy guy this one is, does anybody know where he lives?Just in case he gets lost going home, or something. He does sound kind of drunk, haha!
>>36042599>implying the shamans aren't swole motherfuckersNo room for weakness in the icy and lawless wilds.
>>36042633Shamans are usually more ...stringy.
>>36042555>Can't take a bathrobed octogenarian mano-a-mano.Sounds like you should be looking to practice some form of ranged weaponry instead of investing in a bucket to cover that shameful mop you call 'hair!'
>>36042713Ha! I'd pay to see you even get to a mano a mano against a wizard. Bugger will see you coming from a dozen miles away, and you'll be lucky if you can survive until you are within earshot of his damned incantations.And I'm fine with my axe and shield, fucker. Forlok the Fair... The Fair Princess, more likely.
I would like to take the time to press for more training among the new recruits for the use of ranged weapons. I don't care what, longbows, crossbows, I'll take javelins or even slings at this point. I just got back from a job working as guards on a merchantman and I swear half the recruits I got stuck dragging along for so called field experience didn't know what to do when the pirates started raining down arrows. I swear, kids these days just aren't getting the same appreciation for stringing a bow and feathering an attacker! Every single one wants to run fiercely into battle swinging their bloody sword about. I don't know where they get it from, but most of them think that's all their is to fighting anymore.Thank the gods most of those wash out before too long.
>>36042906Hmph. At least he won't gag when he DOES see me. Tell me, is the beard merely a decorative compensation for your weak chin, or does it also serve as an extra layer of armor when you go as long as you have without washing it?But to get to the point of it, your brutish axe is pretty obviously worthless for fighting any kind of wizard, save perhaps a bound one. It's far too slow. A rapier to cut him to bits before he can start any kind of "abracadabra" business is far more suitable, don't you think?
>>36043067>>>/archer'sguild/>>36043081>>36042906Ladies, ladies, you're both beautiful!
>>36043081I wash enough as it is, one time a week and no more. Keeps the good humours inside, and the bad ones where they belong, with the virility of another man shoved up your ass, wimp.A raìer may be useful in one of those fancy pancy duels you are so fond of, but in a real battle they're worth the same as you: nothing. And like I said, you won't ever get within earshot of a wizard without his own consent. And even then, he can crush you with a flicker of his fingers.
>>36043133I'M NOT BEAUTIFUL, I'M DANGEROUS *flexes furiously*
>>36043067I blame the barbarians. Recruits show up here when they're not stupid or smelly enough for them. Our image needs work. Sad but true.>>36043133Pah! Archers are but another kind of fighter. A more stylish kind, true. I, for one, support the motion put forth by >>36043067. Besides, if we are hypothetically to compete martially with the spell-casters, we are not likely to get very far by running up and hacking at them.
>>36043298>Besides, if we are hypothetically to compete martially with the spell-casters, we are not likely to get very far by running up and hacking at them.And what was I saying, you pansy. We can't fight them head on, and we can't stab 'em in the back because of our mighty code of honor.
>>36043298>>36043358I still don't see why we're so set on fighting them to begin with. Sure, there's a few bad apples but most of them have given due respect to the guild.
Pardon me is this the Fighter's guild?
>>36043412Yes, yes it is.
>>36043268Now, now. Being bad at duels is nothing to be ashamed of, my big friend. Real battles aren't my expertise, it's true, but if you continue to beleaguer my character with such baseless accusations I'll have your precious beard as a trophy before you hit the floor.Maybe it'll be useful as a sponge, eh?>>36043358But let's put such base conflicts aside for now. We need to focus on our common... difficulty, that being these caster sorts. Would you agree that crossbows would be a suitable weapon for such a situation?>>36043381I hate to be so blunt, but the sign outside does say "FIGHTER'S GUILD," doesn't it? It stands to reason we ought to be able to fight whoever we please, should the need arise. I do think we may be overestimating them, though. More often than not, any one given mage is but an aged virgin fiddling about with potions or scrolls, as opposed to an omnipotent warmage.
>>36043381I'm not bent on fighting them, I'm just saying that we should make 'em pay their dues in a way that doesn't get anyone hurt.>>36043412Yes it is, come in.
>>36043457>>36043441Who is in charge here? I have a missive i need to deliver from the Mage's guild. If i can't deliver it in person i'll have to head back there to that hellhole.
>>36043457Understandable, but as I mentioned >>36042236, there's a rather simple fix to the issue: talking to the right people.>>36043446Sure, we could talk about how to fight the Mage's Guild, but there are more pressing matters.>>36043481This is one of the guilds that doesn't have a guildmaster. Closest we have is Coragax the Steelclad, Fechtmeister, but he's out. I'll take the message for ya.
>>36043446Is that so? I've killed more people in a holmgang, a real duel to the death, than you have hurt the feelings of those pretty ladies you call rivals. Come and get me! *bangs shield with axe*A well placed bolt would kill a wizard, sure, or divert their attention enoughfor a meleefighter to close in and slash 'im. First worthy thing to come out of your mouth today.
>>36043518Thank the gods, *hands the missive to Xafras*Now that this is done i can get a drink. Need one after getting hit on be a tentacle horror.
>>36043518You talk to the right people allright, but it won't hurt to have a plan B that doesn't involve blood being spilled
>>36043558No problem. Watch out for yourself out there.>>36043560True. I have never been a strategically-minded satyr, so I leave those decisions to others.
>>36043538I would, but... ah, your stench's shield has already turned my stomach for the evening. I'd rather kill you when I'm feeling better.>>36043518Do you think we ought to have a guildmaster? Just thinking out loud, you know, but it might be a nice thing to have somebody in charge in case of formal occasions or temper tantrums from our more volatile members.
Fighters! I come as a rep-presnt-ive of the Barbarian Guild! I was sent here to ask a question!Barbarians like weapons! But some people say some weapons are better than others! One of my brothers told me his long mace was better than my maul! He is dead now, but I am scared he might be not lying...Is he right?
>>36043621To the Esteemed Fighter's guild,We at the Mages guild thank you for the ingredients you have collected for us. We regret to inform you that due to internecine conflict with the Druids in the form of a "Prank war," our guild treasury has been stolen. While we work to recover our erstwhile funds we are unable to pay you they worth of the items you collected. We ask you either wait patiently for this situation to resolve itself or allow us to give your credit to pay for our services to make a fair trade.Sincerely, The Mages guild.
Man fuck these mages! They all ish ungreateful fucks! I suggest we take some pikes, *burp* some mead and we go in mage's guild sticking up the pikes in the ass of every mage we see!And I would like to propose to discuss the shortage of beer this month!Oh and one last thing - Drunken boxing ish awesome *hic*>falls over
>>36043621This plan is reserved for when push comes to shove, and only if you'r thing doesn't work, Xafras. Economically, we have th upper hand. They need the product we offer at the rates we set, much lower than the ones they could get from adventuring contracts. Meanwhile, we can do just fine without their money, just cutting corners, or moving the manpower we have devoted to supplying them with their ingredients to other ventures. Tell them this, and they will realise they need us >>36043661Like you would be able to even put a scrath on my shield, worm.>>36043709It's all in how you use it, lad. Unless you're fighting with those needles my friend here calls "rapiers". Then yes, some weapons are better than others
I was informed today by the guardsmen that I need to file a 2 page long report because of a bandit raid I went on yesterday. They said that if you kill more than 40 brigands in a week you need to report on it. What the fuck is this? On a good week I kill 240, this is going to be a serious problem.
>>36043723Prank war, eh? I understand. The druids and mages have been having intermittent prank wars since before the guilds existed, it's an honored tradition.>>36043832We're a guild now, we need to keep tabs on our actions. If you don't want to do so much writing, kill less people.>>36043821I'll save that card for if the Bureaucromancers don't get their finances worked out.
>>36043832Look Bonehammer, just use the 136 EZ form. >Where were you when you killed things>What thing where you killing>How many did you kill>Who was with you when you killed things
>>36043895Kill less people? ...Kill... Less people?Is this what you spineless women have come to? Kill less people? Those damned bandits had been stealing from a farming village for months! They had it coming.
>>36043945Avoid unneccessary bloodspill. Otherwise, it's bad PR.
>>36043723Now, see, this kind of thing is simply unacceptable. Delaying our payment for the sake of a childish arrangement with those moss-eating druids!? They think we are no better than thugs!>>36043895I can hardly understand why you're condoning this. They clearly think of us as underlings, not as partners. Something must be done!
>>36043919That makes sense. The form they gave me was filled with useless shit. I owe that guard's uncle for drinks, he was probably fucking with me.
>>36043966Why did you become a warrior, Ulrik? I became one because I enjoy killing people, but most of all because I like protecting innocents. You're telling me to stop killing bandits for the sake of PR? And you call yourself, "the Bearded?"
>>36043945You could just incapacitate them, you know. I've been working on my nonlethal combat skills for such a situation.>>36043969You are finding offense where there is none, Forlok. Calm down, we're working this out peacefully.
>>36044027Well, he DOES have a beard. That's hardly something you can dispute, you know. Hardly worth bragging over, either, in my opinion, but I shan't judge.
>>36044050The bandit type doesn't reform. And some of them were murderers. No reason not to kill them, in fact, there was reason to.
>>36044073We have these things called jails. And court systems. I understand when lethal force is necessary, but it isn't 'always'.
>>36044027I became a warrior because I like protecting innocents. Period. I wouldn't go further down that path, son. A warrior isn't just muscle, but the sum of physical and tactical prowess, both in and out of the battlefield.Couldn't you get to the same results without hindering our image? You say image doesn't matter, but who is gonna sell weapons and food to bloodthirsty marauders who murder just because they "like it"? Think ahead. We're part of this society, and we must abide by their rules.>>36044055Now you are just looking forward to getting your ass kicked seven ways to Sunday, maggot!
Can someone tell me why my food expenses aren't covered by the guild contracts? Just because I'm a dragon and consume a few dozen cattle a day, the guild doesn't want to foot the bill? I'm hoping this is a misunderstanding.
>>36044073>>36044100I must agree with our burly friend, here. We're fighters, not shepherds of lowly criminal filth. Send the Guard if you wish to detain a pickpocket. Lethal force might as well be our nom de guerre, if you'll pardon my pun. Have you men no honor?
>>36044180>>36044146>>36044100Forlok and Banrok are correct. You humans aren't even immortal, why go out of the way to protect your criminals?
>>36044180We're fighters, not bloody murder machines! We must protect people, and make those that break the law pay! We are not fuckin' judges!>>36044211Because we're not protecting them, Serrakosh, we're dealing a much harsher punishment than death by keeping them alive but broken and trapped.
>>36044211>>36044180I've killed twelve men today, don't speak to me of honor. But if I desired wanton violence I would have stayed with the other satyrs in the vale. Instead, I chose a path of goodwill and fighting for the protection of all who need it. So I'm not going to kill people who don't deserve death. Especially those who haven't killed another.
>>36044289...Harsher than death? I swear, you humans are quite strange.At any rate, can someone address my question? >>36044161
I tell you what, kids today...hmm... they just don't get it! In my day you had t' do more than be good with a sword. Ya had ta think! Ya had t'-....zzzZZZz- Gah! Like I was sayin'. Kids today, don't know ho to think! Gotta come up with a plan, more then runnin' head long into a spear.Did I ever tell you kids about the time me and my companions fought our way to the throneroom of the Black Lord of Aetherwind!?Now that was a battle and a half I tell you....zzzzzzz....
>>36044294Those that work with murderers may as well be murderers. I knew the leader of those bandits, whose corpse now fertilizes the soil, and he had slain a teenage boy. Not to mention they were stealing from an already poor village, and some had to have died.Crimes are discouraged by harsh punishment. These were bad men, it's good for all of us that they're dead.
>>36044365His name was Netherwind you senile fool! Eh? Or was it Otherwand?Where's my sword? ...Or was it an axe?
>>36044324Food expenses aren't covered by the guild because they never have been by any guild. We cover clerical expenses only.>>36044372If you were a paladin, I'd say you've fallen. Since that isn't the case, suffice it that murder is unjust, even when done to murderers.
>>36044401You had a mace you half-blind codger!And I know full well it was Foulwand, I just said it!
>>36044436Bah. You elves have never had the nerve to do what's necessary. You kill your neighbor, you get killed yourself. Otherwise there isn't any real punishment. I actually care about justice.
>>36044465That you, Aila? You don't look a day over 213. Why don't you come here? I've still got some gas in the tank!Or was your name Genna?
>>36044477Elf? ELF? Do I look like an elf to you? >>36042236
>>36044436Hm? Money for food was included in the bills for my first few jobs, but this has stopped recently.
>>36044520Pointy ears, half-naked, bleeding heart, you might as well be, yes.
Sorry I'm late guys, that rampaging Frost took a while to put down. What did i miss?>>36044542Besides there being a dragon in our guild apparently.
>>36044562Half naked? Unless you're counting the pauldron, "half" is an understatement.>bleeding heartApologies for considering morals before ganking every person who pings as evil.
>>36044581You smell like cave dragon. Ha! Hopefully you thinned out some of the primitives.
>>36044517Bah, would you look at what I have to deal with? Senile old goats and bickering children all over the damn guild.... When did we get a guild?I tell you, this reminds me of my days campaigning with the sellsword companies in the North! Now those were some real fighters! Could march for three days straight without any pissin' and moanin'! Up hill both ways in fact! Don't get me started on the winter marches either.....zzzzZZZzzzz....
>>36044611Yes, i just finished off a large Frost dragon that was terrorizing the people around here. So how long have you been part of the guild Mr. or Ms Serrakosh?
>>36044581It's good to hear someone else say it.I didn't say anything because I thought someone had put something in my drink.>>36044611How did you even get in here, you great lizard?
>>36044672I don't use human titles. Serrakosh is fine.About three months. I find human society interesting, and I had just finished sleeping for 15 years. I felt like doing something novel.As for you, how did you become a dragon killer?
>>36044705Is your eyesight poor, human? I'm outside, my voice is entering through some open windows.
>>36044706Are you actually a fighter, Serrakosh? I'm pretty sure most dragons are members of the Monster's Union.
>>36044746The recruiter suggested that I go there, to which I replied I did not want to. He started shaking, so I thought he might be cold and I suggested I light a fire. He quite fervently declined that and allowed me in.
>>36044724Ah, I see. My apologies, I thought your voice was coming from the stuffed creature on the wall yonder and that perhaps I was going mad.
>>36044778I would not completely discount that possibility, Forlok.
>>36044706Went ruining diving with some friends, young fire drake just took up residence, it ambushed us and killed most of them but missed me with its breath. I closed to melee and was using a frost-brand, i lived it didn't. Took it's corpse to the Mage's guild since the bloody thing torched all the other loot. Sold it for a bit and one of the mages made me an enchanted necklace with one of it's fangs on it. After that i got jumped by a few other dragons claiming me a murderer or screaming about racial pride. I added more teeth to my necklace. After a while it just became my thing. This Frost dragon is my 6th fang.
>>36044810I'm honestly not very knowledgeable about my own species. My father, and the other dragons I've known, considered it the fault of those of our race who have died that they did to begin with. Said we were born powerful enough where if a mortal managed to kill us we didn't deserve to be alive to begin with.Your story is quite interesting to me. Is that what most dragons are like?
>>36044802Yes. Er, no, certainly not.Um. Perhaps we should get back to the question... of... of...Helmets! Yes. Tell me, Sir or Madam Dragon, do you or do you not prefer to wear a cooking-pot on your head to protect your "brains"?
>>36044623I can't elate how wonderous it is that old goat is asleep off his own musings. Everytime that bloody story changes.Up hills both ways, down hills no ways, dragging the point days upon days.
>>36044866In the case you actually think that I am the stuffed animal, I meant you should not discard the possibility that you are going mad.I have not yet found a helmet stronger than the bone-plates covering my head, so I do not wear any, no.
>>36044904Oh look a dragon born...... Haven't seen one of those before.
HELLO. AYE. I'M LATE. SORRY. Roight, so. Barbarians, good friends of mine, good at smashin' things, not so good at takin' orders. I'm figgerin'.. Loose alliance, so we's can bring 'em in on big jobs wivvout subtlety.Mages don't pay us? We don't get 'em anythin'. Easy enough for me.Standard issue gear? Eeeh. Give 'em a good solid breastplate an' 'elmet, preferably one that lets 'em give their best war face! An' then their choice o' spear or axe. Don't need to futz around with a sword. Them's only got one use anyhow.Helmets: You really need to ask? Helmets.Unarmed combat's not bad. Always good to be ready for whatever. Like 'at time that orc tried sneakin' up on me in the privy.. Used his skull to scrape me bum, har har!
>>36044848In my experience it's mixed bag, some go out looking for fight to prove their strength, others just don't want humans getting uppity, a third group just hate the fact a human is capable of beating them and the rest just don't care. Dragons like most sentient races are very different from individual to individual.
>>36044922Would it be too much to ask the Barbarians to trounce the mages, under the notion that they're ale is held captive? This would of course entail our guild to profit from this endeavor with said ale. We get ale, the barbarians get a good bash, and the mages get what they bloody deserve for their niggardly attitudes.
>>36044916Well, I certainly was born from a dragon, but I am a full dragon, if you were implying something else.>>36044939I see. Where I was from most of the dragons were very old and very powerful, and did not care much about the goings on of the mortal world. That is probably why I am so interested.
>>36044996Har har har! I like it! And the barbarians get all the experience what they get for breakin' magic things!Praise victory!
>>36044939Say, did you ever know a woman named Rashida?
Sorry to interrupt my Lord's but matters most urgent have come up, I haven't had time to do my face paint and outfit or come up with rhyme or rhetoric. Most tragic. It's the gunslingers again. You know? The ones of metal and flame.
>>36044996Don't antagonize the mages, they're good people. And they've got enough shit to deal with.
>>36044922>helmetsOh, good grief. And you seemed much more sensible than that at first.Look. What's the point of a helmet, anyhow? Can someone tell me that? They're heavy and bulky and you can barely see out of the damned things at what you're defending yourself against. Who are we fighting, fellows throwing rocks? Any rock big enough to worry about is a rock big enough to dodge if you're a fighter worth his salt. Leave them to the Guard to muck around in, that's what I say.
>>36045032Didn't you requisition a vacation day for today? Why are you at work?
>>36045054Here comes our resident pussy again! How'd you get into the guild anyhow?
>>36041499>Helmets, yes or no.To be honest, it really depends on what your going up against. I wade into battle with my helm on for protection from lucky strikes, yet however I am unlucky enough to wield an ancient vorpal blade. No helm or pauldron or magic can stop it when it decides to kill. I've seen it cut clean through a Greathelm!The thing terrifies me. It's purpose is sinister, I swear. I hate it.
>>36045073I did. But as you can see by this large set of tomes and scrolls they are petitioning for membership again. Time of work doesn't mean much at gunpoint.
>>36045054Have you ever noticed that much of the shit the mage guild deals with is a product of their own machinations?
>>36045068You havin' problems with helmets? I think you need a stronger neck, laddie! Why, I once beat a troll in an 'ead-butting contest thanks to me helmet! Staved his skull in, I did, and my ears were ringin' for only three days! Besides, barely seein' out of one? Seeing is merely a convenience for a true warrior!
>>36045001Most of the old ones stay out in the wilds far away from humans, better hunting for them. They are pretty big after all. Most Dragons around here are either weak or young by your races admittedly high standard.>>36044996I've been to the mage's guild to sell off dragon bits. Place is a mess and a fortress. They deal with outsiders daily. Might want to put more planning into it than that. >>36045028Hmm, doesn't ring a bell. Could you describe her?>>36045032Their "bullets" bounce of dragon hide so i'm not worried.>>36045083Because he's a satyr and when he lets loose he really gets into combat.>>36045091Yeah, go see a cleric about that.
>>36045083I was there at it's founding, you mindless marauder. It's a sad state when I'm the reasonable one between us.>>36045106I won't deny that, their line of work is extremely unpredictable.
>>36045118Rashida Scalebane, a Jamuuran woman? Short hair, dark skin, saber in her hand? REALLY hates dragons?
>>36045101Oh, for heaven's sakes. Really? The gunslingers are just chemisters with bad tempers without the strength to wind a crossbow.Let them make their own guild, if they're of a mind, and leave us out of it, I say.>>36045121>It's a sad state when I'm the reasonable one between us.We are entirely agreed, my good goat-man.
>>36045154Not ringing a bell, sorry. I don't hate dragons, just better at dealing with them than most others who want too. That being said she sounds like i should meet here one day.
>>36045110Oomie beet troll with 'ead? Not dis troll! You beet week troll!
What was I talking about.... Oh yes, the sellsword companies! Not bad really. Knew how to make a real plan of attack they did. Even took down wizards and warlocks of immense power! Just don't make them like they used to.What's all this about dragons now?
>>36045118Yes but they don't bounce off of my face. There is a reason I don't work in a nobles court. >>36045158I agree totally sir but their bad temper might be directed at the guild and it's members and I'm unsure if your armour deflects bullets..The point is they want to be considered part of the guild as a separate branch and for accommodations to be made for them.
>>36045176And now there's a troll in here? Who keeps letting these creatures in?
To the Fighters Guild,It is with sadness that we have learned that three of your recruits have stolen a holy goblet from our treasury and proceeded to dry hump a statue of our goddess while shouting things in Dwarven. We have one of the recruits at our Chapel, and ask for you to make the other return the goblet before the next Holy Day.P.S. We invite all of your members to our next Holy Day celebration. There will be feasting.-Knight-Champion Lightbane
>>36045176"Oomie?" You callin' me one of those lanky pink-skinned surface-dwellin' pansies? THEM'S FIGHTING WORDS, TROLL! I'LL PICK YOUR TEETH OUT OF ME TEETH WITH YER TEETH!
>>36045212Can someone tell me what this says? I can't read.
>>36045229Urh? I BITE YOR TEETH WIT MY TEETH AND TEETH EM TO BITS!
I recommend a simple short-blade for the new recruits. After which they can specialize into more...exotic tools of war. Helmets depend on ones preference, though I would recommend one if you wish to keep your scalp. Unarmed combat is quite useful to properly learn if one becomes disarmed, not that any proper warrior would allow themselves to lose their blade, and would probably save us some cost in cleaning up the blood and gore off of the walls every time a warrior is gutted.Anyway, has anyone seen my khopesh? I swear, if one of you fools took it then not even Essil-al-Albabu would be able to save you from my wrath.
>>36045196Find someone wearing good armor that is fresh and not tired after fighting a dragon. Those bullets will be of no consequence then. Then tell them why they can't join.>>36045203No idea>>36045192I just slew one on a rampage.>>36045212Fricking dwarven ale again i bet.>>36045240Our recruits fucked up a church.
>>36045212>>36045240Oh good Gods above...Our recruits have stolen nice feasting ware and humped statues and we need to get the ware back before the next holy day to which we are invited for feasting.>>36045276Yes well sadly that is rather hard consider the nature of the guild.
>>36045263I find short-blades rather difficult to use. Considering they are smaller than my individual claws.
>>36045192>Even took down wizards and warlocks of immense power! Just don't make them like they used to.I say!Could you repeat that part? How did they go about doing that? It's damned impressive, if true.>>36045212Aah, the paladins. It's a shame they've got one of our own recruits doing that. We need to teach those creatures a lesson.I'll definitely be attending that Holy Day feast, though. Fine fellows, those men. A bit stuck up sometimes, but fine fellows the lot. We could learn a lot from them.
>>36045212And now more criminal activity from our guild? This reflects poorly on our reputation.Well, someone write back to the paladins telling them I'll have these poozers sorted out in no time.
>>36045296If you'll let me rest i'll do it then. Just tired after fighting that dragon right now.
Has anyone seen Jorro? I think we went drinking last night. I seem to vaguely remember a church...
>>36045118Maybe I should, I think this sword is giving me visions... but I can't risk losing the damned thing though! If a cleric declares it as a desecrated relic, they might be inclined to take it from me and destroy it. Vorpal weapons are too rare to give up.I've been trying to use it sparingly lately, because it's getting worse.
>>36045301Anyone can be killed with enough force and effort. Might want to ask him ow many lived through the fight however.>>36045340Well this is going to be good.>>36045299Start with some armor to cover your soft spots first.
>>36041499KROGTHAN DEMAND CONE OF SILENCE ON MEETING. KROGTHAN HAS DOCTOR PRESCRIPTION!
>>36045330Well that's one problem sorted. I must ask does anyone have a face paint smudge? I maybe in robes to make a wizard envious of but I can sure at least do my paint->>36045340You.
>>36045262YOU CAN'T BITE ME TEETH WITH YER TEETH IF YA DON'T HAVE ANY LEFT! YAAAARGH!
>>36045371>>36045363Eh? My head hurts.
>>36045330Looks like it'll be a short task. >>36045340
>>36045221When did they start makin' kids so damn big? Seems like half the runts that come here have never even seen the proper way to use a spade! I don' know what farmland spat you out but they must have been using drake shit to fertilize the fields.>>36045276Bah! Everyone's killin' dragons these days. Seems like everytime I get off the pot some kid is running in from the stream with a newt on a stick callin' himself the new dragon slayer!>>36045301What!? Oh that business with the wizards, it was simpler than you think! That's the problem today! These fighters today just aren't thinkin! Always got to go shoving their sword up the nearest monster they can find like they're goin' to find hoards of gold and king's daughters just falling at their feet!It's just like that one lad, what was his name... Garret? Jared.... No! I remember now, his name was Jace! Kid didn't know the pointy end of a sword from the pommel! Reminds me of that time I got caught deep in the lands of the Unholy Blight....zzzzzz....
>>36045408You know, I think I'm going to get some more sleep. Hey, dragon, can you fly me somewhere? Err, fast?
>>36045384Read. This. Missive.>>36045212And if I don't get a good explanation in five sand timer turns I will do to you what the King did to my father after the joke about how the Queen "feels".
>>36045299If you are not willing to attempt to learn then you are wasting my time. Find a dragon-sized blade then come back.>>36045212Indeed, I will be there. Your religion is quite interesting to an easterner like me. I dearly hope that will find the ones responsible soon so that I may flog them for their insolence. I apologize for the inconvenience.>>36045363Dafyd, I apologize for interrupting this meeting, but my khopesh has gone missing and it is imperative that I find it before I teach sparring class this evening. Have you happened to come across it?
>>36045424Do you mean me? I suppose so. Climb onto my tail.
Yes hello I would like to make fightings pleaseMostly with cats
>>36045362Cursed weapons are never worth it Colin, besides with the money you have you could afford a new uncursed one.>>36045384You and your freinds humped a goddess's statue and stole a chalice last night. We have a note from the paladins that your buddy is still there in a cell.>>36045408Yup.>>36045410I've killed five admittedly young ones. However since thats a bout 4 more than your average Dragonslayer has done, i think i've earned my title.>>36045430It's under the dire bear in the kitchen i think.>>36045447Don't, let him face justice for his stupidity.
>>36045402Heeheheh.. Ow, bloody hell that stings, fink I chipped a tooth on your eyelid, I did!You're a good sport, troll! I think I've got another cask of stout around here somewhere. Let's do this again sometime!
>>36045447Ahem, that one's wanted by the paladins.>>36045465Mhm, what are your qualifications?
>>36045472Justice? I've been taking a short nap. Did this man do something wrong? Hm?Where did he go?
>>36045472The only hook-shaped thing you'll find in my kitchen is a meathook. Also, Dire Bear? That's just Bobby, he's a real softie, and always helps with the butchering when the pansy new recruits won't.
>>36045485Hmph. Hit hard for little oomie-simile thing. Hard skull. Maybe did beet troll.
>>36045490He defiled a church and stole from it while in a drunken stupor last night.>>36045521He was using the khopesh as a backscratcher Culinaire.
>>36045530Har har! Told you! Ain't nobody who can beat Axebeard Beerhammer in a headbuttin' contest! Course, there was the dullahan of Amberley Moor, but 'e don't count, given that 'e didn't 'ave a head, har har!
>>36045538The dragon was a distraction! I'm out of here on this dire bear![There is a muffled GRROOWWR in the distance.]
>>36045490Apparently, he and one of the other lunkheaded recruits have done unholy deeds, stolen sacred goods, and generally offended our good friends the Paladins, and if we don't make things right we won't be invited to their Holy Day feast.Give me the brigand. I'll take him to the Paladins and personally knock his head and Jorry's heads together for them! I could use the air, listening to you lot bicker about who among you is the biggest brute is tiring.
>>36045486I fightings four catsThree cats dead, one runnedI have jousty-stick and guinea steedNot so good for manwords
>>36045538Damn. It's the arena for him tonight, I suppose.
>>36045561Y-you-! HALF-ELF!Someone go and get him I am too busy looking for a damned mirror shield to do my damn face.
>>36045561Poor sod is going to get eaten, or at the very least mauled.>>36045574Can you track a dire bear?
>>36045472Thank you old friend. >>36045410>>36045486>>36045521Falrik! Xafras! Why was one of my blades out of its scabbard? I swear, if one more of my blades goes missing this month I then I will personally decapitate a random member chosen by lots! How can I be expected to teach Swordsmenship with half of my arsenal strewn about the guild hall!
>>36045574A dragon, a troll, and now a... what are you? A mouse?There has to be a line somewhere.
>>36045594(I, personally, would have drawn the line at trolls. The mouse at least seems honorable enough)
>>36045593What's all the ruckas going on in here about anyway? Can't you ever have a meeting without someone being killed violently?
>>36045574Sounds good to me, we could always use someone with your enthusiasm! >>36045593It was likely Kiel, I swear that lad is more fit for the thieve's guild.
>>36045614No one's dead yet. There's currently a recruit riding off on a dire bear, possibly the chef's.
>>36045594Mages are the line i do believe.>>36045614No one has died yet.>>36045582*draws greatbow* I'm on it, you owe me for this. *takes the shot, and hits Kiel in the shoulder knocking him off*
>>36045594>>36045609Mouse is too smallAm rabbit>>36045583Maybeif dire bear is cat
>>36045593The same way you taught swordsmanship to your bedwarmer!
>>36045624It's most certainly Bobby-- he's been grumpy all week, even when I gave him an extra liver in his breakfast. >>36045485Do you have any dwarf bread I can borrow? Even a scone is fine; I just want to show the recruits how food fighters started.
Hail Comrades, I have a question for my fellow Polearm users.I've been fighting with a glaive for a very long time, and none can deny it's effectiveness for combating poorly armored opponents, but I sometimes find that the blade can be ineffective against an opponent in some kind of plate mail. Even with the extra force and torque of a full swing, I have to be very precise and try to strike in between the plates or at other weak points and joints. And of course however, a proper fighter is very aware of this, and thus can adjust their strategy and stance to deal with my halberd, especially if they're wielding a heavy shield.So my question is this. How effective are Polehammers? Is anyone here experienced with them? I'm thinking of having one forged and weighted to deal with enemy knights and juggernauts, but still have the ability to keep them at reach. The blunt force can help cave in those plates I believe, especially if you get enough weight behind a good swing.
>>36045638OH, OH HOLY SHITTHE BEAR HAS SMELLED THE BLOODOH SHIT[Muffled crunches and crying in the distance.]
>>36045673*runs over and tackles the bear off of Kiel* Back off or i'll drop you and make a fur rug.
>>36045673BOBBY! DON'T HURT YOUR TEETH ON ANY WEAPONS, YOU HEAR!
>>36045673Yeesh. I was afraid that might happen. Well, at least it got the Dire Bear out of here.
>>36045673>>36045692>>36045702...I could have worked in the King's court. Or the Assassin's guild. Or both.
>>36045723I'm in Dragonbone plate you don't stand a chance.*punches Bobby in the snout* Back ye git!.
>>36045645My apologies, good Sir Hopsy.
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>36045638>>36045624Well, that's good I suppose. >>36045646You're lucky that I can contain my irritation quite well through meditation long-beard. I don't get paid enough for the ridiculous I have to deal with on a daily basis.>>36045723*throws knife*
>>36045703Bobby is a member of the kitchen staff. We wouldn't have as much roast meat as we need if it weren't for him. Besides, he's a fine worker, and never asks for much more than a nice meal or a recruit. >>36045723Who's a good dire bear? You are!
The bear was a distraction! Fools! Go, my wyvern! Aw fuck, my arm.[Muffled 'Where did he get a wyvern?' in the distance.]
>>36045743>>36045750RRRRAAAAARR!*Takes knife in shoulder, charges Surri and knocks him back.*
zzzzZZZzzzzz..... What now? Bear? Dammit, Ybgvar, get er wife out of the guildhall. If she's not here to string a bow or use a pike she's takin' up good space for the other lasses that can....zzzzzZZzz
Rolled 15 (1d100)>>36045755Can't kill the wyvern without letting Bobby losse damn. Serrakosh could you chase him down please? *draws Frostbrand arming sword* Have at thee you cranky bear!
>>36045750>rolls a 5 on knife throwingAaagh shit, my leg!
To you fucking pricks,One of your recruits pissed on my bread while claiming he stole "valuable shit" from somewhere. I demand that you buy every single piece of piss-soaked bread.
>>36045594hello fighters guildi am fighterplease membership form
>>36045810*Sniffs*Urrra.*Trots off into woods.*
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>36045770Well...his hide is a little tougher than you would think. This gash hurts quite a bit, I'm getting old, reflexes not what they used to be. *Stabs eye with dagger*
Rolled 22 (1d100)>>36045810Shit, looks like I've got to do everything here. *Draws dagger*
>>36045837You just stabbed yourself you're so groggy with pain.>>36045844Now that he's in a better mood in going after that wyvern.
>>36045837>>36045836Here, my friends, we have a time paradox. I apologize, my presence may have caused this.The bear was stabbed in the eye in an alternate time line, which briefly overlapped here. Currently, he is in the woods, eyes healthy.Goodbye.
Gentlemen, I actually recognize that wyvern. He acts as a mount for the Paladins from time to time.Your problems may be solved.
>Watches these events unfoldGuys this is why the Mage's Guild never takes us seriously anymore... Although I guess it wouldn't be a good Fighter's Guild meeting without a good fight breakin' out!
>>36045885Really? ok then i get to rest now.>>36045868Time magic pah>>36045825Gods dammit.>>36045891Yeah i guess.
>>36045862>>36045868Crap, well it'll heal eventually. I'll just go back to my meditation. Which of you will be here for the sparring session in 3 hours?
>>36045770*gets flattened by the rampaging bear.The guinea pig runs away. Thus ends the tale of the heroic Sir Hopsy.*
>>36041499As for the new recruits, I vote they get a nice big pouch of dried stew. Stew is marvelous stuff for adventuring-- you can put fresh meat, dried meat, leaves, enemies, fruit, bread, stew, or cheese in it! You can always find something nice to eat when you know you have stew!>>36045825Is it dwarf bread? Because the piss would just make it better. If not, take it up with Bobby, there's a good chap. (OHOHOHOHOHOHO)
>>36045913Sounds a good deal more interesting than any more of this nonsense, assuming that others are handling the situation with the recruits.
*Arrives carrying a dead elk. Drops it on Culinaire's feet.*Hrra.
>>36045656Har, of course! I always keep a bag of scones on me. Tasty snacks an' good for crackin' skulls if need be! Builds strong teeth!
>>36045913Provided nothing else happens i'd love to. Fighting men is different from fighting beasts or dragons. Think i might be getting rusty.
Alright lads 'n lasses I had to go talk to the leader of the Bards Guild for a bit.Managed to sort out a deal where we take on and train war bards, what are your thoughts on this?
>>36045941Oh lovely, this'll be ready in a jiff. Want the heart, sweetie?>>36045968Thank you. One of my assistants tried to soak the last loaf I had, and the builders thought it was cement.
>>36045986As long as the keep what's in the beeches to themselves i don't see why not.
>>36045986Aye. The more sword arms at the front lines the better. Warrior skalds are also excellent for troop morale.
>>36046011So you are totally against the idea, correct?
To the Fighter's Guild,One of our wyverns has returned our goblet and brought one of the troublemakers to us. We thank you for the swift return of our goblet and will honor your guild accordingly during the Holy Day feast, which you are still invited to. We are sending your recruits home now, and as an added bonus, this letter contains a package of treats for you to enjoy. We hope you enjoy the elven treats known as "hot chocolate truffles".P.S. Do make sure your swords are clean if you device to attend.-Knight-Champion Lightbane
>>36046022Some female skalds would be even better for my morale. If you know what I'm saying.
>>36046011I have it by his word that they're more restrained than most bards. He's an honest man for a Bard the guildmaster so I trust him on it.
>>36046036Methink oomie should test treet first. Trap maybee.
>>36046053Yes well most feral creatures are more restrained than most bards.
>>36046029No, meant they should keep their hands to themselves unless they set the mood, they aren't satyrs theyhave no excuse.>>36046036Nice love these things.>>36046053Good maybe it won't be orgy porgy land then.
>>36043723I say we give them a chance to smooth this over: They can either give us a discount on magic items for the next year ('specially potions and weapons), or they alter the contract to give us compound interest on the missed payments, or we stop doing "fetch quests" for a while and see how well their prank-war goes without their fancy flowers.
>>36046049Verily.>>36045362I suppose I could entertain offers... soon.
>>36046073>>36046036How DARE they undermine my reputation as a cook? And the hygiene of my Tenderizer? Those shiny ponces.
Anyone got a larger version of the OP image? Burt Reynolds knight is something I need more art of.
>>36046097Good thinking.>>36046127Colin Buddy snap out of it.>>36046137Think they wanted to make amends actually. Still they just gave you an excuse to go all out on your cooking. *i have some Dragon meat headig here soon if you want it*
>>36046172...Are you quite serious? Dragon meat?
>>36046049I do believe half of them are lasses, so have fun mate.>>36046137I think this is a chance to show them just how good a cook you are, any man that can make the ingredients you use taste nice is a man I would die for.Also has anyone returned the armorer's hammer yet?
>>36046097I say we build up a decent stock of the nonperishable bits that new members can get, and leave the "moonlit flower of the highest mountain" bit off.>>36046172Lovely marbling on this one, and it's smells nice and spicy-- is it from a red? I'll have a fine time with this; I never get to do much more than roasts, ale, and stew, usually.
>>36046199Not cannibalism if we eat it, besides some people have a taste for it. I don't get bent out of shape when i see a dragon eat people besides the frost dragon had to be butchered for scales and bones anyways. Not using everything is just wasteful as hell.>>36046212Frost actually, Adult that rampaged through 3 villages.
>>36046246Understand. Equal. I bring oomie meat.
>>36046199We're a fighters guild, and the peasants complain when I send the scullery lads out for beef. I had to persuade them with the Tenderizer to avoid a riot.>>36046210It's all stew, mostly. You can do a lot with stew. >>36046246Hmm. Maybe something with apples, then. >>36046271As long as you bring enough for everyone!
I leave for just one minute for a pint and the lot of you piss the bear, someone dies, and cause a whole folly of ruckus.
>>36046271Just don't expect many to eat it. Humans are stringy as all hell or so one of the dragons told me. Not to mention for us it would be cannibalism.>>36046319No one died yet.
>>36046319I opened the meeting and went to talk with the Bard guild master, I come back and all this has happened. How do you think I feel.
>>36046326The mouse died.
>>36046326It's apparently quite tender, in stew.
>>36046326Then just who the bollocks is >>36045916Sir Hopsy?He wasn't an exchange member was he?
>>36046368Crap he did! Poor little fellow.>>36046369Not my cup of tea thank you.>>36046383Rabbit who joined the guild. Poor little thing.
>>36041499>The potential merits of forming an alliance with the Barbarians Guild.We exchange remedial reading classes in exchange for beserking shock troops to hire out.>How do we deal with the problem of the mages guild not paying us enough for the alchemy ingredients we got for them.Blueball them. Make this issue known to the other guilds, and essentially embargo them from hiring trained men from doing their dirty work. They will hire peasants to try and gather rare herbs from dangerous locales, but it obviously wont work. They will see the error of their ways, or else have to leave their towers themselves.>What equipment should be standard issue for new recruits. A padded jack, jack chains, gauntlets and a helm, all topped with a tabbard or baldric in guild colors. They can add on armour from the guild stores based on their needs. Illumination related.Dagger, and either a hand weapon and shield, cross bow or polearm to start with with. As the decide to specialize, they can hit the guild stores for special weapons too.Rope, bedroll, fire starting kit, waterproof cloak and a sturdy cookpot are suggested.>Helmets, yes or no.Always. You ever wonder why people without helms always have so many statues and paintings? Its to remember the dead.>And the benefits of specializing in unarmed combat, other than to annoy Monks.Exhibition, physical betterment, and -you didn't hear it from me- extra coin in the pit-fights.
Alright, I've returned from the Mage's Guild! Their official coffers are drained, but Bureaucromancer Hobbes and Anfarthon offered to fill in the remaining debt from their own funds. Seems there's no need for boycotts or attacks, then.
>>36046383I think he was a potential recruit. >>36046369You know what, for the members that are non humans it shall be allowed, however that means we get to eat the meat of their species in turn.
>>36046430Not anymore I reckon. Not unless we want to explain to the Cleric's Board why we let a rabid bear loose in the mess hall.
>>36046425Awesome. Means i can sell the scales, fangs, and bones then.>>36046451Not rabid just testy, he's better now.>>36046430Exactly, Also a warning on the dishes to avoid cannibalism.
>>36046451He's not rabid, he's just a little under the weather. Give him some time, and he'll be right as rain.
>>36046451We always have a some sort of beast loose in the mess hall, it's a hazing ritual for rookies usually.
>>36046496Either way, we get fresh stew-meat.
>>36046400Don't worry about it gropey, the issue with the Mages has been resolved. However, your expertise in matters of arms and armor is always appreciated.
>>36046488Oh you're fine you fluffy bastard. >>36046496Well I know that, the Cleric's are hardly an amusing bunch though. I don't think they appreciate our sense of humor.
>>36046511Remind me when you put human in a stew please.
>>36046496Hell they let a young wyvrn loose during my first month, this is a cakewalk compared to that. It was sink or swim back then.>>36046511Aye, talking about stew what's for eating?
>>36046532I helping as ass... assitat... ass cook and ask if put in oomie. Cooky man said yes.
>>36046538It was literally sink or swim last month when the water elemental when hay-wire and flooded the wine cellar.
>>36046172Hmm? Is something wrong?>>36046425>Trusting a Mage's Guild Bureaurocromancer to actually pay up.Are you sure? I'm still waiting on my pay from an emergency militia contract to defend one of their outer "observatories" from bandits. Years it's been! It's trifle coin but still.
>>36046532>>36046538Stew's stew, and I keep separate pots for all the types. Why, just last Thursday, that lad with that chunk of scrap metal, you know, the one who lost the leg? He was glad to know it had gone to a good cause.
>>36046550Well, im eating out today it seems.>>36046538You do not want to know.>>36046568Who're you?
>>36046568As far as I'm concerned the payment for that job was getting to kill bandits.
>>36046568Woops, forgot name tag in another thread.
>>36046582Just let me get one that hasn't got humanoid in it then please. Call me squeamish if you must but ugh.
>>36046550Make it a separate stew from the others and put a warning on it please lad.>>36046561Oh yeah, took ages to drink all that.>>36046582Well, looks like we're all cannibals>>36046590As far as I'm concerned killing bandits is it's own reward, payment does sweeten the deal though.
>>36046525Well, I got here a little late. What else about kit do we need to discuss?
>>36046617There was a young lad asking about Polearm advice earlier
>>36046612>>36046607Are you questioning my hygienity? My stews are made of the finest stew, and I would never serve someone the same species! I think I generally give you two the pig one, actually.
>>36046617Descoos why elf in my cave. Elf won't leave. Tell me I husband. Wot husband.
WHAT IN THE NINE HELLS IS GOING ON HERE!
>>36046672You're actually significantly beyond the hectic part.
>>36046612The troll got the worst of hangovers from that
>>36046672A Fighter's guild meeting. Standard fare, really.
>>36046657Uh oh, looks like a wood elf's chosen you as her mate, running won't do you any good. So my advice is to either try and learn about her and make it work, or call us in to kill 'er.
>>36046672I don't even know anymore. I think i'm going to finish moving the Dragon parts to the sellers. See you all later.
>>36046683then tell me...WHY IS THIS PLACE STILL A MESS
>>36046696Keel? Wot, yous murderer? Why kill elf?
Gods, look at the lax discipline here, you don't even form proper shield walls!I've seen not a single good discipline or marching drill in my time visiting, nor any proper use of the pike, lance, or long spear. You simply charge into battle against beasts.How do you expect to fare should you be drafted into a well formed unit against organized enemies?
>>36046714See you at the monthly bar brawl tomorrow then.
>>36046672First time in the Guild hall huh?
>>36046633Ah, the majestic polearm. What do you wanna know? >>36046657Mix vinegar and citrus oil and spray it around your cave. If it works on cats, it'll drive an elf out easy.
>>36046736Grr grr growl ura ra haaar raaagh raa grr.
>>36046745No that's next week.Tomorrow is the monthly bar brawl crawl!
>>36046736Why are you even here, Captain? Do you need the guild's help with something?
>>36046740I'd rather not but if she won't leave if you ask her then she will likely get violent. In situations like this killings the last option.I might have to call in a bard to get her out if you don't want her in your cave.
>>36046771>>36046745Monthly? You women keep one-upping each-other. I drink what this guild drinks in a year in two weeks.
>>36046749The lad that wants advice is here my friend >>36045661
>>36046779Wot mate? Why elf want mate?
>>36046791Of course you do. Blaggard.
>>36046771Wait, whens the annual beast slaying contest then?I have a tribe of murderous giants to slay I've been tracking for months for the event.
>>36046807Elve's are weird, trust me, when a female elf see's someone she likes she moves in despite protests and won't leave them alone.It's some weird thing their god put into them, without thinking they would fall in love with other races.
>>36046877You too far aheed. Wot is mate?
>>36046747yarrand I see it be a waste of time looking for sailors>>36046765RRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!
>>36046765Now, now, Bobby, calm down. >>36046807>>36046894Let me explain this best I can, the way my darling mother did--when troll and troll, or elf and troll, or orc and ork, or orc and humie, or elf and tree, anyways, when they fight real nice, and they conk on head wif a good rock, that is teh thing called luffthen, they stalk the one they lub like prey, and surprise them at home with battle, except wif more grapples and less armorthen, babbiesthat is mate
>>36046894A thing you make snu-snu with
>>360468313rd Wednesday of the month. There's a scrimmage for it tomorrow though at noon
>>36041499>barbarian's guildWhile I am not a member, as an agent of the empire I would /strongly/ advise against any deals with barbarians. It isn't looked upon kindly.>Mages guild paymentcertainty the mighty fighter's guild would have been above such squabbles? I suppose not.>Standard equipment.Pilum, scutum, and galea are of the utmost importance. Ideal, would be the three basics and lorica hamata, or lorica segmenta if you cannot afford mail.
>>36046831Wait until we've worked through all the stew-meat, if you will.
>>36046899I'll have you know we sink as well as an sailor about
>>36046903Wen troll want baby we go dark cave and then split body. Then two trolls.
>>36046899I think there are some recruits looking to go serve on ships, they look like a fine lot, and can swim pretty damn well, last month's water elemental saw to that.
>>36045661I understand your frustration, but the long and short of it is that there is no perfect weapon. Like comparing swords to maces, the glaive is a generalist where as polehammers/poleaxes/ bec de corbains are any armour specialist whick trade their reach and cutting potential for mass and concussion. Personally, I prefer a Guisarme for the combination of wide cutting head, armour piercing backspike, hook with which to snag armour/clothes or trip foes, and the reenforced thrusting tip. Its generalist, but with options.
>>36046966Perhaps it's a tad different for you, then-- mother was never one for details. The elf thinks it works like I said, though.
>>36046966Ah, well explain that to her and she'll likely leave, just point her towards the nearest Orc territories, female elves love Orcs for some reason.
>>36046995>>36047011Understand. Teach elf to split into two elves.
>>36046988>Gary Gygax's wet dream.jpg
>>36046955>>36046967you won't want to be doing that on my shipit be an airship am a privateer for the King and I've just had a new airship madeam looking for a crew
>>36046988One must remember that if one is a soldier, not a brawler, you must think in terms of armies, logistics, and strategy first. And rock-paper-scissors of individual weapons second.A simple spear head for thrusting is light, easily mass produced, and simple. On the end of a long lance it is highly practical for formation fighting behind shield walls, where to space yourselves out far enough to leave room for swinging a long weapon would mean an easily shattered and routed formation.
>>36047052NO, only trolls make babies that way lad, just tell her you can't breed with her and she'll leave the cave.
>>36047057Oh, well then, we can send a few archers and fencers with you if you want.
>>36047057Perhaps I can convince you to leave the service of the squabbling barbarian kings and enter into the Emperor's employ? 11 years of naval service is rewarded with citizenship and a pension of farm land.
>>36047078Not want trivialize feelings of love. Teach elf determination. Teach elf split into two elfs.
>>36047075You make a good point Legate, always good to have an outsiders view on things. What about specialized squads with different polearms?
>>36047133Ah, young love at it's finest!
>>36047133Well, have fun I guess
>>36047121I tried the Navy thing before ladit wasn't for meand besides "squabbling barbarian kings" just means more gold for me>>36047113do they know their way around a ship?I don't sailor who don't know port and starboard
>>36047075Hence the mention of my preference for the Guisarme.And spear walls only work if you're using pre-plate technological levels. I assume you're not from some backwards dirthole where they still fight like the ancients. Pike, supported by polearms, crossbows and shieldmen are the height of foot troops.We're the fighters guild, not some dirt-poor peasant militia.
>>36047121Actually, been wanting to talk about setting up a guild hall in the Empire, we would be able to help out over there as well as here. Just remember that in times of war the Fighters Guild is neutral and will only fight against the sides that attack guildhalls
>>36047145You forget your roots Arleiv.We are specialists tasked with the contracts of kings and clients to perform tasks that ordinary soldiers or legionaries are ill equipped or experienced to perform. Pay little mind to the Legate, however good his advise it, solely for the purpose he thinks like a soldier and not a fighter.
>>36047242But a soldiers view is always important, many of our recruits were once men of war and it does affect the guild.
>>36047281Truthfully said. But we mustn't get wrapped up in the politics of an empire. It gets trickyHarreqdale was a mess, and they were only a wealthy merchant republic.We're still not accepting contracts from them until next spring.
>>36047281Many of our recruits are now dead. I'm all for discipline, but we need self-reliance foremost.
>>36047335>>36047356Agreed, I remember the first time I was left alone in the redmist woods, if it hadn't been for some tricks a ranger taught me I wouldn't be here today.
>>36047145A great number of our legions enlist troops from the far reaches of empire who wish to serve for citizenship, land, and perhaps the rank of centurion.We allow certain variations in equipment to fit the tradition of the peoples, you can tell the land a legion is from at first glance at the make of their galea and shields. On the standard though, front line, light shock troops will carry a short javelin in addition to their lance in order to disrupt an enemy charge. Should the javelin pierce or circumvent a shield, an enemy forward hastati now has a gap to place pressure. Now you speak of specialized squads. A squad, or centate, of eight man is standard in the legions. Auxilaries such as skirmishers would be lightly equipped, with numerous short pelta for throwing. Military police, the immunes to whom keeping order over soldiers and conquered territories falls to will often carry spear hafts with no head to cudgel miscreants. Cavalry carries shorter spears, smaller shields and longer slimmer spatha blades.Remember, in large armies, logistics trumps tactics. I'll take sharpened sticks over adamantine pilum if I can be guaranteed a stick for every man, readily replaced, and standardized across the force.
>>36046988Thank you for the insight Gropey. I think I'll try to overtime build an arsenal of different Polearms to have for my choosing before a battle.
>>36047238Unlike barbarian kings, we can keep order within our borders. If anyone wishes to enlist in the auxiliaries or legion there are methods to do so. >>36047222>mea faciem cumThe pike is ideal in a situation where armor and shielding is poor, and longer pole arms are an advantage. If you aren't some backwater mercenaries, and have the industries, economy, and logistics to armor and shield every man in multiple legions as opposed to not being able to properly outfit a mercenary guild, you have shields, and armor, and as such, adapt a shorter spear.I wager you have been the "wife" to many men in your travels, pantomime
>>36047768Lad, we aren't an army, we're a group of mercs and adventurers that made an organization to train wannabe warriors and to give retired soldiers a job.
>>36047768Oh look a bottom bitch prelate who thinks his one tour through the desert is grounds for his experience in telling us fighter how to be proper mercenaries.
>>36047768Pike are for stopping calvary, and stopping other infantry formations.Have you wondered why arming troops with shortspears hasn't been seen in 1000 years? Get thee behind me, sodomite.