File: Purple_Heart.png (313 KB, 388x891)

313 KB PNG

>>37981458
... you've been standing around for the past few minutes, briefing each other and shooting the breeze and you kind of want to get back to work. Oh, sure, Blanc expressed admiration for your snow fort, and that's always enough to warm your shrunken, wrinkled, alcohol-soaked heart, but you're not entirely comfortable with hanging around in the middle of a snowfield, in the middle of nowhere.

You'd normally count this as Attending Party or On Break, but you're pretty sure there are more important things to do. Besides, everyone who'd just been fighting looks absolutely beat; Rokko's just barely standing on both legs, Moru's trademark energy is absent and she's studying the ground around her feet with interest, and even Estelle is sort of leaning on her sword, even though that's going to do horrible things to the metal in her weapon-

More importantly, you don't like the way Neptune is looking at you.

Neptune, aka Purple Heart, aka the patron goddess of the nation Planeptune and all things Sega. All YOU know about her is that she's got a reputation for quirkiness, she's no longer really participating in the friendly competition between Gamindustri's nations- something about a nonaggression pact or some such- and that she tends to keep to herself nowadays.

Right now, Blanc is technically talking to her, but it's all going in one of Neptune's ear and out the other, and she's STARING at you with that stupidly serious expression of hers.

[ ] [HOMEWARD BOUND] Make up some excuse to get everyone back into Lowee proper.
[ ] [CONFRONT] If Neptune's got something to say to you, then she'd better just come out and say it.
[ ] [SNEAK] Try to surreptitiously put someone between you and Neptune.
[ ] [FLEE] Leave the goddesses to their talking. Drag your allies away from this scene.
...
[X] [DRINK] is always implied.

>>37981458
Glad you're back blorp, even if it is to run the one quest series of yours I am not actively reading.

>>37981471
>[x] [CONFRONT] If Neptune's got something to say to you, then she'd better just come out and say it.

We can take her.

>>37981471
>[ ] [FLEE] Leave the goddesses to their talking. Drag your allies away from this scene.

What? No, we're not running, we just have to go to the thing. Over there. Yeah.

>>37981471
[X] She obviously wants your booze. Share a little.

File: most exciting time 2.jpg (113 KB, 1047x754)

113 KB JPG

>>37981471
>[x] [CONFRONT] If Neptune's got something to say to you, then she'd better just come out and say it.
Never seen a dwarf before, madam? Huh? HUUUUH!?

>>37981471
>[X] [DRINK] is always implied.
Of course it is. We'll need it for this
>[ ] [CONFRONT] If Neptune's got something to say to you, then she'd better just come out and say it.

>>37981471
Welcome back Blorp!
>[x] [CONFRONT] If Neptune's got something to say to you, then she'd better just come out and say it.

>>37981471
>[x] FLEE
fly you fools

>>37981471
>[X ] [CONFRONT] If Neptune's got something to say to you, then she'd better just come out and say it.

I just took a break from Neptunia off steam to check tg and OH LOOK MORE NEPTUNIA

>>37981471
>[X] [CONFRONT] If Neptune's got something to say to you, then she'd better just come out and say it.
"I'll sell you back main character status, but it's not going to be cheap. . ."

>>37981655
Don't believe Urist is aware she is the main character. Only Neptune believes in the existence of such a thing, in which she thought was her own till recently

>>37981471
>>37981471
>[X] [CONFRONT] If Neptune's got something to say to you, then she'd better just come out and say it.

>>37981712
Yes, it was a joke.
Though if she's brings it up. . .

Sadly I'll miss the rest of the session, but I hope it's a good one!

File: cea8cb5927ccb988e812a2a97(...).gif (496 KB, 320x180)

496 KB GIF

>>37981471
>[X] [CONFRONT]

See... there was a time, not too long ago, when you were intimidated by the goddesses.

Because really, they're the goddamn /goddesses/, with the power to create the continents from mud, reduce those very same continents to mud (albeit with a hell of a lot more blood and screaming), and their very existences are the lifeblood of their respective nations, and vice versa. That's the sort of shit that can leave anyone awestruck- it left YOU awestruck, and you'd never had the chance to meet a goddess until a day or so ago.

Well, after meeting Blanc, you've come to realize that the goddesses are just... people. They're not ineffable unreachable incomprehensible beings beyond the mortal ken, they're EXTREMELY human. Oh, sure, the goddesses each pack enough power to reduce you to a greasy stain of ash, but you're already weak and buggy enough that half the adventurers you pass on the STREET can probably pulverize you, so it's not really all that fucking big a deal.

... long story short, you take a long pull from your flask. Then you square your shoulders, draw yourself up, and pitch your voice an octave lower before giving Purple Heart your best surly dwarven growl. Because if she's got a problem with you, then she'd better fucking come out and say it, 'cause you're NOT in the mood for any catty back-and-forths or strange vendettas or some shit.

You're pretty sure Rokko stiffens up, and you faintly hear someone else gasping in shock, but you take some comfort from Blanc's amused snort.

For her part, Neptune straightens up and, in a burst of pixels, summons a weapon into her hand- it looks like the godforsaken spawn of a sword and a construction girder- before pointing it at you. It's a windless day, but her hair doesn't seem to give a shit and whips around dramatically. "Urist McTwelfthbeard!"

(Cont.)

>>37982353
>McTwelfthbeard

WE ARE SENSITIVE ABOUT THAT

File: 1367027147004.gif (982 KB, 320x287)

982 KB GIF

>>37982353

... it's Twelfthbay.

"- Twelfthbay!" she amends, her stern voice not changing one bit. "You've stolen something very important from me: my role! My position as the one and only protagonist!"

...

You squint at her. That ain't possible. If there's any justice in this world, at ALL, then it wouldn't let you be the main character.

"But when strange things began happening, it all began revolving around you, right?"

... what? HELL no. Besides- it all started revolving around Estelle, right? SHE'S main character material, not you! She's got the sword, the skirt, and the legs! (You steadfastly ignore how Estelle clasps her hands to her cheeks, staring at you with big starry eyes. LITERALLY starry, at that. Fucking moe anime bullshit.) YOU'RE just a short smelly dwarf, that automatically makes you the comic relief sidekick or-

"ObJECTion!" Neptune barks out. For some reason, Blanc groans and runs a hand down her face, muttering something under her breath. "For years, I served as the comic relief AND the main character! They're as mutually exclusive as ice cream and pie! You MUST return to me my status as the main character!"

Blanc, aka White Heart, aka the patron goddess of Lowee and all things Nintendo, resplendent in her HDD form's battle bikini, cracks her knuckles ominously. "Look, Neptune, we /really/ don't have time for this shit..." she growls.

"We have ALL the time in the world for this shiznit," Neptune fires back, not even bothering to look at Blanc. "The plot never moves until such dilemmas are resolved, after all."

Armok preserve you.

[ ] [FINE] Alright, fine, pay Neptune her lip service, tell her she's the main character.
[ ] [REFUSE] Turn her down. If you're really the main character, Neptune can't touch you.
[ ] [IGNORE] Right then! Time to talk about something else, like the boss battle you guys just had.
[ ] [LEAVE] ... go back to Lowee and get the plot moving again. Let Blanc deal with this.
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>37982353
>McTwelfthbeard
Oh lord

>>37982393
[X] [IGNORE] Right then! Time to talk about something else, like the boss battle you guys just had.

>>37982393
>[x] [IGNORE] Right then! Time to talk about something else, like the boss battle you guys just had.

>>37982393
>[ ] [IGNORE] Right then! Time to talk about something else, like the boss battle you guys just had.
It's what she deserves!

>>37982393
>[ ] [FINE] Alright, fine, pay Neptune her lip service, tell her she's the main character.

Damn nobles. Always talk, talk, talk, never any work.

Alright, fine. And how do you know about Dwarven names anyway?

>>37982393
>[X] [WRITE-IN]
>[X] Tell her you have no idea how to do that.

>>37982393
[ ] [REFUSE] Turn her down. If you're really the main character, Neptune can't touch you.
Let's not make Blanc have to do everything.

>>37982393
>[IGNORE] Right then! Time to talk about something else, like the boss battle you guys just had.

>>37982393
>[x] [IGNORE] Right then! Time to talk about something else, like the boss battle you guys just had.
Oooh wasn't it quite a fight! Reminds me of a time a forgotten beast rolled out of the depths of earth, and we-

>>37982393
>[ ] [WRITE-IN]

Beg her to take it back, being a main character is gonna get us killed

>>37982393
>[ ] [IGNORE] Right then! Time to talk about something else, like the boss battle you guys just had.

>>37982393
>[x] WRITE-IN [SASS]
NEENER NEENER

>>37982393
>[X] [FINE] Alright, fine, pay Neptune her lip service, tell her she's the main character.
We don't even WANT to be the main character.
Tell her she can have it back

>>37982407
As far as I am concerned, she complimented us

>>37982393
>[X] [WRITE-IN] What's it worth to her? As it happens, we're interested in "retiring" from active adventuring, if given the ability and materials to build the fort of our dreams. So, you know, a nice big plot of land, a lot of that minimization shit to make a large thing about the size of an adventurer until you enter it and shrink down, a lot of raw materials, and 3/4ths of all the booze in gameindustri.

>>37982393
>[ ] [WRITE-IN]
Ask blanc if she crazzy

I have no idea what the fuck I just read but apparently we're a drunk midget whos somehow pissing off the avatar of sega for merely existing?

I'm with MC. I'm too fucking sober for this shit. scuse me while I go get stuff to be shitfaced with.

>>37982586
>I have no idea what the fuck I just read but apparently we're a drunk midget whos somehow pissing off the avatar of sega for merely existing?
Read the previous chapters, also read the opening post.

>>37982393
> say fine
> becomes neptunia quest
Noooooo

>[ ] [WRITE-IN]
"What makes you think I have any say in it?"

>>37982586
That's The Spirit!

>>37982586
There is a video game IRL
http://store.steampowered.com/app/282900/
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyperdimension_Neptunia
Hyperdimension Neptunia.
A RPG world where video game consoles are goddesses, and video games are personified as moe girls.
The main character of that video game is the personification of sega.
This quest is a spinoff fanfic which goes off the rails where instead the main character is the moe personification of the video game dwarf fortress

>>37982393
>[x] [IGNORE] Right then! Time to talk about something else, like the boss battle you guys just had.

>>37982666
> becomes neptunia quest
top kek, no.
It explicitly says it will be lip service.

>>37982705
~Lip service~

>>37982676
You know, it sounds kinda retarded when spelled out...

Oh well! Urist time!

>>37982586
>apparently we're a drunk midget whos somehow pissing off the avatar of sega for merely existing?

Pretty much, yeah.

>>37982721
why did you say it like that?
it sounds lewd when you say it like that

>>37982721
I'd service nepnep with my lips.

>>37982666
>Say fine.
>Join Neptune's party. She is main character.
>Get removed from Neptune's party.
>Is now secondary protagonist on sidequest.
>Threat Renamed Hyperdimension Neptunia Filler Arc: The Hyperdimension Dwarf Fortress Sidequest.
And nothing changed ever.

>>37982393
>[x] [IGNORE] Right then! Time to talk about something else, like the boss battle you guys just had.

>>37982393
>[x] [IGNORE] Right then! Time to talk about something else, like the boss battle you guys just had.
So we found this cool box.

>>37982666
Seconding this.

File: blanc.jpg (68 KB, 319x796)

68 KB JPG

>>37982393
>[X] [IGNORE]

... you know what? You're being REALLY nice about this whole thing. Hell, you're even being ~diplomatic~. See, you didn't gut-punch her for getting your last name wrong, and you CERTAINLY didn't knock out those goddessly-perfect teeth for even DARING to invoke the B-word in hearing range. 'Cause really, you're more comfortable around goddesses now, but not nearly comfortable enough to get up close and personal with your fists and their punchable faces.

You turn to Blanc. So anyway, what you were talking about earlier- yeah, so Myrra escaped, even after you broke all her fucking limbs. Bullshit, right?

"Ah... yeah. Yeah, it's fucking bullshit." There's a flash of light, and Blanc pops out of her combat-ready HDD form- no more battle bikini, just a fancy patterned dress and a big ol' hat. And a much calmer voice. "Tunneling through the floor, though...? If it's made of the same material as these walls-"

"H-H*a***d h*el**p-" A burst of static underlines Rokko's already-unsteady voice- the robot pauses to clear her 'throat.' "... s-she had, help. A-And Urist did-n't c-const, ruct the f-floor."

You scowl, feeling your cheeks redden. Alright, yeah, mea culpa and all that. You're not making THAT mistake again-

"Hey! Heyyyy!!" A second flash of light envelops Purple Heart, leaving behind a... shorter girl with scruffier hair? What the hell? "Stop that! Stop advancing the plot without me!" Neptune whines, bouncing on her heels. "Don't think you'll be rid of me by phasing me out of the conversation-"

"ANYway," Blanc continues, stepping in front of the much-reduced Neptune. "Myrra had an accomplice. Attacked Arturia and Lee-Fi to keep them from reaching Rokko in time, but we captured her- settle DOWN, Moru, they're /fine/- Estelle-"

"Aye-aye!" The Dragon Warrior isn't particularly tall, but she manages to pluck the screeching, worry-sick catgirl up off the ground by the scruff of her neck. Jeez. Moru really cares for her friends, huh?

(Cont.)

File: neptune.jpg (37 KB, 403x700)

37 KB JPG

>>37983554
"O-Of course I do!" Moru caterwauls, still struggling. "They're my family! Mine and Rokko's!"

... right. Family. You can't help but notice how Rokko glances down at her feet, looking mildly guilty- but, yeah, that's a whole other can of worms that you're not touching with a ten-foot pole.

"Ah... dang. The atmosphere, it's getting too serious..." Neptune sinks to her knees in the snow, reaching for the sky and speaking in a bad stage-whisper. "My quest for the position of main character... forever delayed...!"

You resolutely ignore the patron goddess of Planeptune. No one else even seems to /notice/. Anyway, that was that... "fearmonger" they were all talking about, right? The one who royally fucked up the town?

Blanc nods. "Got it in one. Nasty piece of work, but she was a rookie. She ought to be in custody by now. We really should head back, make sure Arturia and Lee-Fi have her locked down-"

"They're being left ALONE with their attacker!?" Moru groans. She wriggles free from Estelle's grasp, easily dodging the Dragon Warrior's recapture attempt and dashing off in the direction of town. "I'll go check on them first!!"

"Ah, Moru-" The Dragon Warrior groans and sets off after the Monster Hunter, jogging through the snow at a much slower clip. "Moru! Get back here!!"

"I'm just fading into the background," Neptune whispers hoarsely, falling onto her side with a *pomf*. "Oh... it's growing dark... I see the red ring of death..."

[ ] [CHARGE!] Chase after Moru and Estelle. Don't split the fucking party, guys.
[ ] [THE BOX] ... oh yeah. You DID find a box. Maybe you and Rokko ought to bring it up to Blanc?
[ ] [NEPNEP] Alright, alright, /fine/. Help the annoying comic relief character back up. Wonder where her HDD form's height and tits went. Ponder the impossibility of physical transformations that leave one at a different mass/weight than they started out with. Go insane.
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>37983598
>[X ] [THE BOX] ... oh yeah. You DID find a box. Maybe you and Rokko ought to bring it up to Blanc?

ALWAYS THE BOX

Don't give in to Neptune

>>37983598
>[ ] [THE BOX] ... oh yeah. You DID find a box. Maybe you and Rokko ought to bring it up to Blanc?
>[ ] [THE BOOZE] Give Nep a drink

>>37983598
>[ ] [THE BOX] ... oh yeah. You DID find a box. Maybe you and Rokko ought to bring it up to Blanc?
It was boxed shaped, but the bad guys had it, that's never good.

>>37983598
>[x] [NEPNEP] Alright, alright, /fine/. Help the annoying comic relief character back up.
If she's a good girl, we might give the MC position back after we're done with it~

>>37983598
>[x] [THE BOX] ... oh yeah. You DID find a box. Maybe you and Rokko ought to bring it up to Blanc?
I don't give a shit if Vert came to laugh at Nep. Box time.

>>37983598
>[ ] [THE BOX] ... oh yeah. You DID find a box. Maybe you and Rokko ought to bring it up to Blanc?

>>37983598
>[x] [THE BOX] ... oh yeah. You DID find a box. Maybe you and Rokko ought to bring it up to Blanc?

Nep will get better on her own. Eventually.

>>37983598
>>37983673
Yes. How there she try to take the Booze's position as the main character in this quest.

>>37983598
>[ ] [NEPNEP] Alright, alright, /fine/. Help the annoying comic relief character back up.
>Imagine if you had a HDD in which you have a glorious beard upon transformation

>>37983673
>>[ ] [THE BOOZE] Give Nep a drink

Nothing could go wrong with this lets do it

>>37983673
>[ ] [THE BOOZE] Give Nep a drink

>>37983598
>[X ] [NEPNEP] Alright, alright, /fine/. Help the annoying comic relief character back up.

>>37983683
>>37983734
>>37983781

Guys, she's like a leech. If you give her the time of day she'll stick to you and never let go.

>>37983673
>>37983598
Seconding this anon's post. Box & booze for the pining notprotag

>>37983673
On one hand, I'd say thats a waste of our booze.
On the other hand, I'm greatly curious how (not)well NepNep can handle dwarven booze.

>>37983808
But I want that to happen.

>>37983598
>[ ] [THE BOX] ... oh yeah. You DID find a box. Maybe you and Rokko ought to bring it up to Blanc?
>[ ] [NEPNEP] Alright, alright, /fine/. Help the annoying comic relief character back up. Wonder where her HDD form's height and tits went. Ponder the impossibility of physical transformations that leave one at a different mass/weight than they started out with. Go insane.

>>37983746
....
that is either a terrible idea or a wonderful one

>>37983598
>[X] [THE BOX] You need to see this, Blanc.
>[X] [THE BOOZE] I need to drink this.
>[X] [CHARGE!] Quick, while the annoying one is busy moping!

>>37983673
Both of these yes

File: nopenope.jpg (12 KB, 223x202)

12 KB JPG

>>37983598
>[X] [THE BOX!]
>[X] [THE BOOZE!]

It's not like you couldn't keep up with them- dwarves are known for their bursts of speed, even if they don't quite have the brains to prevent themselves from running into fire, magma, or the pointy ends of goblins. It's just a completely different matter when you're absolutely exhausted from a hard day's work of fighting for your goddamn life.

So really, you can only watch as Estelle and Moru tear off across the landscape. Rokko doesn't join them. Given her busted-up metal soles, you can sort of see why- to the blue bomber, running is generally something that happens to other people. Blanc also sits tight, but that's probably because to her, gravity is something that- again- happens to other people.

"Farewell, title card... farewell, credit roll... farewell, main series and spinoffs and TV series, it was an honor to have my name grace your beautifully-crafted lettering..."

... Neptune stays behind because she's Neptune, and you're starting to get an inkling as to what THAT entails. You kneel down next to her and start digging through your pockets, and she looks up at you expectantly. "Aha! I knew that would appeal to your crusty little heart!" she chortles, sitting back up. "So how was it? Was my acting worthy of a nomination? Can we start calling this Hyperdimension Neptunia Que- mmph!?"

You hold her still until she stops struggling against the alcoholic might of your tertiary flask, and you lower her back down to the ground. See, it's like CQC, but with alcohol instead of neck-breaking or jugular-slicing. A lot cleaner and more pleasant for everyone involved.

"Surprisingly effective," Blanc deadpans, nudging Neptune with her shoe. The representative of Sega simply giggles and rolls over- and over and over and over, leaving a snow angel that looks like it's been flattened by a snow bulldozer. "Out of curiosity, how much did you even...?"

(Cont.)

>>37983598
>[ ] [WRITE-IN]
THE IMP!
The imp claimed to be the leader of the flies, reborn via the master after you rekilled it.
The imp is what dug the tunnel.
The imp is what carried the box!

>>37984932
If you're any judge- and you know your fucking booze containers- then it only took her about about 2.5 gulps to Relaxed and 5.8 gulps to get Absolutely Goddamn Inebriated.

"Tempting, and I'd keep a flask close by whenever she visits, but... well." Blanc sighs and shrugs, a surprisingly delicate gesture for someone who uses a hammer to turn her enemies' fully functioning skeletons into bone chips and jelly. "The last thing I need is for her to build up a resistance, decides she likes alcohol, and go around being shitfaced /all/ the time."

... okay, yeah, Neptune the Happy Drunk is the absolute last thing Gamindustri needs.

"B-Booze Man," Rokko mutters under her breath. She returns your quizzical stare with a blank expression of her own. "J-Just, thin-nking up. Robot master ideas."

Right.

"I-I keep, a n-notepad," she mutters, slightly defensive.

....... right. Okay. Anyway. You pull out the spent treasure cube you found earlier. More importantly, you pull out the bullshit magical device that was apparently used to /transport/ said treasure cube, which otherwise would have remained rooted in some dungeon until the end of time.

That's enough to get Blanc's attention. Even more so once you explain how it came into your possession. Still, she doesn't answer for a moment; she turns the device around in her hands, either deep in thought or examining its circuitry. "... you know, I've never seen one of these things before in person," the goddess eventually murmurs.

Huh. Really? You would've thought-

"Oh, sure. I know of the existence of these things," Blanc continues, riding roughshod over your words. Even if Rokko didn't put a cautioning hand on your shoulder, you'd have let it go; there's something of a thundercloud forming on her brow. "But almost everything sold throughout Lowee is filtered through countless levels of bureaucracy, through delegates, through government employees...

(Cont.)

File: a blanc for ants.png (91 KB, 240x240)

91 KB PNG

>>37984960
"Nowadays, if some up-and-coming merchant wants to sell some amazing snake oil in my capital, it shows up as a single line of text, on a form filled with a million such items, and it's one of a billion forms eventually signed by me. Can't look them in the eye. Can't see for myself if they're suspicious as hell."

You wait for her to continue, but Blanc continues staring at the treasure cube holder. About fifty Neptune revolutions later- you counted, you watched the drunk, giggling goddess roll around your little group, covering herself in enough snow to make another snow fortress- Blanc finally looks back up.

"I'm gonna go back to town," she growls, a feral glint shining in her eyes, "and I'm going to ask these treasure cube merchants exactly who the hell /else/ they're selling these things to."

[ ] [WELL OKAY] ... yeah, you'll just let her do that. An angry goddess is bound to get results. So you'll go back to town and catch up with Estelle and Moru.
[ ] [BETTER IDEA] How about you and whoever else can come along to talk to those treasure cube merchants? Maybe they'll reveal more to a scruffy dwarf than to an all-important goddess.
[ ] [HOLD UP] So there was this imp, see? It claimed to be the leader of the flies, and it dropped this box. See if this rings a bell with Blanc?
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>37984990
[X] [HOLD UP] So there was this imp, see? It claimed to be the leader of the flies, and it dropped this box. See if this rings a bell with Blanc?

>>37984990
>[ ] [HOLD UP] So there was this imp, see? It claimed to be the leader of the flies, and it dropped this box. See if this rings a bell with Blanc?
Also, we didn't really win per se, the enemies left because someone called "the master" recalled them and insisted it be immediate
then we just bled there until healing arrived

>>37984990
>[ ] [WELL OKAY] ... yeah, you'll just let her do that. An angry goddess is bound to get results. So you'll go back to town and catch up with Estelle and Moru.

>>37984990
>[ ] [HOLD UP] So there was this imp, see? It claimed to be the leader of the flies, and it dropped this box. See if this rings a bell with Blanc?
I won't hold her back from if nothings comes up though

>>37984960
>"I-I keep, a n-notepad," she mutters, slightly defensive.
Rokko is a cute girl, I hope we see her again

>>37984990
>[X] [WRITE-IN] Learn Bureaucracy from the master by tagging along as she asks very large, blunt, and bone-smashing questions.

>>37984990
>[x] [HOLD UP] So there was this imp, see? It claimed to be the leader of the flies, and it dropped this box. See if this rings a bell with Blanc?

>>37985099
We need to track down her creator and get her fixed
Find the personification of squareenix and beat MML3 out of them

>>37985296
> squareenix
Fuck CAPCOM. Dammit

>>37985296
>>37985320
No, no. This is fine. Squeenix probably deserves the beating.

>>37985296
> squee-nix
ftfy

>>37985296
Sounds good

>>37985296
We haven't seen anything to suggest there are personifications of countries.
The goddesses are personifications of the consoles produced by one company, with their nation being the company itself (that is, cpu white heart is all of nintendo's consoles, her nation is nintendo)
Video games get personified.
Video game companies that never produced a console, like square enix, are non entities in this world as far as I can tell so far (although I might be wrong)

>>37985365
As long as they can deliver MML3, I'll beat anyone

>>37985455
I thought most of the characters in the initial game were representations of companies, and they expanded into games with the sequels?

>>37985455
They're adding characters based of companies in an upcoming game actually.
>S-sha: A parody of Square Enix. She’s a cool, beauty lady that often responds with “not interested”. She has a history as a failed moviemaker, and has had a close encounter with death.
>B-sha: A parody of Bandai Namco. She’s considered a “toy store hero” and loves money more than anything. She charges a small amount of money for just about anything, and whenever possible.
>K-sha: A parody of Konami. An all-girls student at Lastation who has an interest in listening to and performing music. When she holds a gun, her personality changes to that of a war veteran’s.
>C-sha: A parody of Capcom. She’s a leader figure of the Gold Third, and contrary to her looks, she’s quite the glutton. She loses power whenever she gets hungry.

>>37985656
I don't know, I am not familiar with those games. I am referring mostly to what we saw in quest and a bit of reading I did on it.
There is also the fact that most games in the series were never translated to english

>>37985706
>Letter-Sha
those are shitty names

File: White_Heart.png (186 KB, 311x839)

186 KB PNG

>>37984990
>[X] [HOLD UP]

Well, YOU'RE certainly not gonna stand in the way of a well-deserved beating. Or a multitude of beatings, judging by the look on Blanc's face. But if she's gonna go hunting down the merchants who /sold/ those treasure cube holders, maybe it'd help to know exactly WHO was holding this one.

So you fill her in, doing the best you can to describe what you saw- although since you were hurting and/or beaten black-and-blue at the time, the details are a little fuzzy. You remember what the thing SAID- a "master" was calling it and Myrra back to base, and all that jazz. All you remember of what it looked like are the big horrible alien-like eyes on the tiny little body; Rokko pitches in and fills in the rest. The damn thing was carrying a backpack, and a crazy assortment of tools, including a mining pick and-

"... okay. Change of plan." You mutter a curse and cover your eyes as Blanc abruptly shifts back into her HDD form in another dazzling flash. She floats up into the air, jets of energy pulsing from her shoulderblades, and tosses the treasure cube holder back to you- it bounces off your helmet, but you manage to catch it anyway. "You go back and talk to the merchant. I'm going to talk to Vert."

Vert...? Green Heart, leader of Leanbox and patron goddess of all things- well, all things XBox? Why the hell-

(Cont.)

File: Evil Is Good.png (167 KB, 256x256)

167 KB PNG

>>37985885
"Between that little /imp/ you described, and all those damn flies- shit, I should've realized it before," Blanc growls. "We're talking about Keeper. /Keeper/! Myrra's one thing, but between her and Keeper working together, we're looking at a goddamn rogues gallery of Leanbox outcasts! Either Vert doesn't know about this and her nation's in a ton of shit, or she DOES know about this and /I'M/ gonna give her shit for it!"

Keeper?

"You and Rokko just- just go catch up with Estelle and Moru, okay? Tell 'em I've stepped out to Leanbox for a bit. And take that damn idiot Neptune back with you!" Blanc roars, before taking off fast enough that it shakes the snow off the nearby treetops. With a shrug, Rokko jerkily leans down and picks up the downed Neptune like a sack of potatoes, before tottering off toward town.

You follow along. You're not really focused on much more than putting one foot in front of the other, because... seriously.

/Keeper/?

[ ] [KEEPER] Dig through your memories. You know this name from somewhere.
[ ] [CALL MOJANG] She's in Leanbox right now, right? And she's been in talks with Vert or something? See if she knows anything about this.
[ ] [TEXT MAIA] Your little Civilization friend who wants you to meet up with her in Leanbox- see if she knows anything about this. Or about Keeper.
[ ] [ROKKO] She seems amazingly calm about all this. You could use a little calm right now.
[ ] [FUCKING RUN] You're not sure how much a nation can function without its leader being in town, but... maybe you should tell Estelle ASAP, like Blanc wants you to.
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>37985926
>[x] [TEXT MAIA] Your little Civilization friend who wants you to meet up with her in Leanbox- see if she knows anything about this. Or about Keeper.

This can't possible go wrong.

Also make sure Nep can be moved. If she weighs a ton because she's covered in snow it's gonna be a bitch to drag her with us.

>>37985926
>[ ] [CALL MOJANG] She's in Leanbox right now, right? And she's been in talks with Vert or something? See if she knows anything about this.
>[ ] [FUCKING RUN] You're not sure how much a nation can function without its leader being in town, but... maybe you should tell Estelle ASAP, like Blanc wants you to.
FUUUUUUUUUUUCK.

>>37985926
[X ] [CALL MOJANG] She's in Leanbox right now, right? And she's been in talks with Vert or something? See if she knows anything about this.

>>37985985
Wait nevermind, I missed the line about Rokko taking her to town.

>>37985926
>[ ] [CALL MOJANG] She's in Leanbox right now, right? And she's been in talks with Vert or something? See if she knows anything about this.
>[ ] [TEXT MAIA] Your little Civilization friend who wants you to meet up with her in Leanbox- see if she knows anything about this. Or about Keeper.
>[ ] [ROKKO] She seems amazingly calm about all this. You could use a little calm right now.

>>37985926
>[ ] [KEEPER] Dig through your memories. You know this name from somewhere.

>>37985926
>[x] [BOOZE] We need to think, ergo, we need to stimulate our brain cells.
>[x] [TEXT MAIA] Your little Civilization friend who wants you to meet up with her in Leanbox- see if she knows anything about this. Or about Keeper.

> Dungeon Keeper
Uh oh.

>>37985926
>[X] [KEEPER] Dig through your memories. You know this name from somewhere.
>[X] [TEXT MAIA] Your little Civilization friend who wants you to meet up with her in Leanbox- see if she knows anything about this. Or about Keeper.
>[X] [WRITE-IN] Text Moru that Rokko's with us and Neptune, taking the slow way back. That way she won't feel bad for running off after just finding the Blue Bomber, and will think Neptune will protect us.
>[X] [WRITE-IN] Call Estelle. Give her the info without running. She'll know what to do, if anything. Set up a rendezvous outside the treasure block merchant's.
>[X] [CALL MOJANG] She's in Leanbox right now, right? And she's been in talks with Vert or something? See if she knows anything about this.

It's a long walk. Plenty of time to send a few texts, make a few calls, and do a search with our phone to try and jog memories of Keeper.

So uh, I haven't been keeping track of all the bad guys here, but doesn't it seem like each of them has an iOS port? Are phones the masterminds behind it all?

File: 7 million dollar Dwarf.png (46 KB, 1225x297)

46 KB PNG

I still really want Urist to regale to her companions stories about Dwarven medical science.

>>37986129

Master of Magic has not had shit done in the last 20 years.

Granted it was released in port form on the Playstation (Japanese only) at some point in 97.

Majutsu no Keifu (シヴィザード 魔術の系譜)

>>37986129
That and old, old games. Abandonware, plus mobile games, plus piracy. A trifecta of evil, on an uncharted volcanic island. Ouya Island.

There they plot their diabolical plans. To destroy Gameindustri and remake it in their own image!

>>37986535
When we save the world and get our slice of neutral ground to build a fort on, we should invite all the fort builders. Even Myrra and Keeper.
We all have to stick together, and maybe they'll be less evil if they have a place we can all build fortresses and dungeons and shit.

...Fuck, they probably just want to be remembered and have friends.

>>37986314
That would be awesome. Too bad we can't hire other dwarves, we could use that to turn Rokko into some sort of booze powered adamant robot.
Like a cuter Bender.

>>37986726
One of our upgrades will probably be getting dwarf minions, either that or we get them once we actually have a fort up.

The big question will be if they're going to be classical dwarves or if we're going to get cute moe dwarves.

>>37986726
>That would be awesome. Too bad we can't hire other dwarves,

Master of Magic can spawn dwarves of course.

>>37985706
Compa/Konpa and IF are the developers/publishers (Compile Heart and Idea Factory).

>>37985926
>[X] [BASICALLY A LITTLE OF EVERYTHING]

Dwarven minds were not made for introspection. They... were made with a sliding scale where good and bad events are given equal weight, so that the death of an entire extended family can be offset by seeing a REALLY well-made engraving of a table cowering before a giant kea.

... the point is, you've got better things to do than mope around. You pick the tertiary flask up off the ground and polish it off, because you NEED your brain cells nice and fried by all that alcohol.

"Ooooh, that'sh an indirect kiiiisssh," Neptune slurs drunkenly, her head upside-down and bouncing off Rokko's back every few steps.

You ignore her. Or rather, you bounce the empty flask off her head, and THEN you ignore her. Because you're busy getting some goddamn stuff /done/.

First, you pull out your phone and send off a text to Maia! ... or rather, you send it off via a pretty damn circuitous route, in that your text bounces through the International Guild before being eventually redirected to your intended fucking recipient. It's a little annoying, since Maia can apparently text /you/ directly, but given how paranoid she was about your status as a freelancer-

Okay, well, now that Myrra and Keeper, once freelancers and now notorious outcasts, are apparently rising up and doing horrible things, maybe there's something to Maia's paranoia.

You shake your head and dash off your text. Nothing too substantial, just a quick heads-up and non-specific questions about, oh, two certain Leanbox freelancers who've apparently gone bad. And attacked you. With magic and giant fucking flies.

... well, whatever. Next up, Moru. Nothing important, just... y'know. Rokko's okay, Neptune's okay, you're all together, and she doesn't have to fucking piss herself worrying about the Blue Bomber after she fucking pissed herself worrying about her other friends. Moru's really more high-strung than you initially thought, huh?

(Cont.)

File: dragon quest series.png (380 KB, 423x875)

380 KB PNG

>>37987418
"T-Tell h-her, t-to call up T-Trek. A-And tell her to, g-get r-ready," Rokko suddenly adds in that labored, half-broken tone of voice you've come to associate with her.

You shoot the Blue Bomber a quizzical look. How did she know what you-

"Y-You... whisper, out loud w-what you-'re texting."

... fucking hell. You do? Really? GodDAMMIT, that's just- gah! Fine! You'll tell her! And you're done texting anyway!!

Rokko doesn't reply, but you can FEEL her amusement from this far out, even without her saying anything. You growl and punch in the numbers for your next call; soon enough, Estelle picks up.

"Urist? Sorry we left you back there, I JUST caught up to Moru, you wouldn't BELIEVE how legendarily fast that girl can-"

Fine, whatever, it's just- y'know. Blanc's flying to Leanbox. Something about talking to Vert. Said to tell you, you'd know who to tell.

"... what? Really?" Well, THAT knocked all the perkiness right out of her voice. When Estelle starts talking again, it's basically the veteran speaking, all seriousness and no nonsense. "Alright. I'll- I'll get to town. Straight to the Basilicom. I'll let Moru go, she'll find Arturia and Lee-Fi soon enough. Please don't tell anyone else about this, Urist; policy dictates that-"

That it DOESN'T become the talk of the town that the patron goddess stepped out to her rival goddess's nation for an informal chat? Yeah, you can see why.

"Thanks, Urist." There's a note of gratitude in her voice- it's not really something you're used to hearing from ANYONE, it's usually 'please stop screaming with an axe in your hand' or 'please stop, this bar has no more alcohol left.'

W-Whatever. Meet in the market, outside that treasure cube merchant? You know, the one next to that store where you... uh, might be banned from going to for the foreseeable future?

"No problem!" Ah, there it is, it's Cheerfully Perky Estelle again. "Don't strain yourself, now!"

(Cont.)

>>37985926
>Dungeon keeper moe personification
SQUEEEEEEE!

File: 1370150562702.png (159 KB, 859x352)

159 KB PNG

>>37987441
Right. Well. One more call. It's about high time you talked to Mojang, anyway; your friend-slash-pupil(?) was busy as hell the last time you tried contacting her, but, y'know. That's to be expected, now that she's basically signed an exclusive contract with Leanbox, so the work must be pouring in.

Mojang picks up on the first ring. You've almost forgotten that she's even chirpier than /Estelle/, for crying out loud. "Urist-chan! Ohmygosh, I was just about to call you!"

... honorifics. You'd forgotten about those, too. Jeez, she- well, okay, that's not important. There's something pretty big going on, 'cause you've been getting attacked by, uh, some freelancers who used to be Leanbox. Just wanted to see if Mojang knew anything about rampaging outcasts, or horrible fly monsters, or-

"W*at's th*t? * c**t hea* y**, Ur**t-"

You frown as static starts fuzzing up your earpiece, basically wiping out Mojang's voice. You curse and pull back, staring at your damn newfangled phone- no, it's got /signal/, so why can't you-

A new voice cuts in, lower and huskier and scrambled by some sort of filter- but unmistakably female. "Well. We can't have that, now, can we?"

You THINK you hear faint echoes of Mojang's voice- she's protesting, by the sound of it- but then it's overridden by that same corrupted voice singsonging "always on, always listening, always on-" before the signal goes completely dead.

Rokko slows to a stop, frowning in confusion as you bleakly stare at your phone. That's... wow. That's really fucking unfortunate, right there. It's like all this horrible shit just had to wait until /right now/ to start up, huh?

"Told you... you shoulda hashed out th' main charassher stuff," Neptune mumbles, drooling onto Rokko's armor.

If there's a bright side to this debacle, it's how Neptune yelps quite nicely when you bounce your phone off her forehead.

[TO BE CONTINUED NEXT THREAD]

File: end.jpg (17 KB, 512x512)

17 KB JPG

>>37987465
Alright, that's a pretty good place to stop, given that it's a weeknight and... well, it's a weeknight, fuck weeknights!

Barring any more unfortunate complications, the next thread will be THURSDAY NIGHT, starting from 8-ish pm EST! Updates and stuff to the schedule will be at https://twitter.com/BlorpQuest, and questions can totally go here or at ask.fm/BlorpQuest.

Glad to be back, guys, and thanks for tuning in! Hope you guys enjoyed this session.

>>37985926
>[ ] [KEEPER] Dig through your memories. You know this name from somewhere.
>You know this name from somewhere.
I figured it out!
Dungeon keeper has the ability to posses units. The first fly? the second fly? the imp? all claimed to be our nemesis. But the first two died and came back! How? Because it was never a fly, nor an imp. The nemesis who claims we backstabbed in the past is actually none other than the moe personification of dungeon keeper. Who was using flies and imps which are both units from its game, possessed as per the spell in its game

>>37987535
>A new voice cuts in, lower and huskier and scrambled by some sort of filter- but unmistakably female. "Well. We can't have that, now, can we?"
Super fucking shit.

Thanks for the thread Blorp, it's great to have you back.

Can't wait for Thursady

>>37987465
>always on, always listening, always on-
kinect!

>>37987535
Thanks for running! Thursday can't come soon enough!

>>37987630
Oh hey

>>37987581
>>37987697
Thank YOU guys for participating! Honestly, I didn't expect this sorta turnout after a month+ of inactivity.

I'll do what I can to run more often; to be honest, my schedule over the next few weeks are going to be kind of unstable (which is annoying, since I thought I'd be back to relative normalcy until April, at least).

If it really comes down to that, I'll see what I can do, even if it means running shorter threads at weirder times.

File: 26-noscale.jpg (957 KB, 1280x720)

957 KB JPG

>>37987829
Blorp, can we have Segata Sanshiro join our party please?
I think the upcoming situations will require someone who's skills involve making people explode twice when he throws them.

>>37987829
thanks for running blorp

btw, I feel really bad about what we did to myrra and freddie
my heart can't handle hurting all those beloved games. now we are fighting poor keeper too? I feel like i could cry
btw, what happened to her with the development of war for the overworld?

>>37988087
I... I think he would be too powerful.

And he wouldn't be mortal.

He wouldn't even be able to appear as a physical manifestation, otherwise Planeptune would have had no reason to lose the console war the way that it did.

But we'll see.

>>37988320
>keeper
>what happened to her with the development of war for the overworld

...... I think the safest way to answer would be "nothing good."

>>37988944
>He wouldn't even be able to appear as a physical manifestation
He could totally be our Spirit Guide!

>>37988944
A missile was heading for the Planeptune basilicom and he sacrificed himself suplexing it into space. ;_;7
[spoilerThis was why Sega lost the console war. They lost their champion.[/spoiler]

>keeper turns out to be wearing a combination of horned devil and mistress equipment
Ugh. Anyway KNEW IT, imps can't tunnel through reinforced walls.