>Twitter: @EuroWarQM>Archive: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=First%20Europan%20War%20Quest>Pastebin: http://pastebin.com/40f05rLRToday is the Feast of All Spirits and while the war has somewhat dulled the mood, you were given a vacation by the Gallian and you'd like to get as much of it as you can. Which, in this case, means going out on a date. "What do you want to do first?" You ask."Kill a small animal," Ernestine says. "Pretend it's my nosy boss. Maybe eat it afterwards.""It's actually quite impressive how DuLac looks after her team," you say. "Hell, some of my classmates went out of their way to get themselves and their teams killed during exercises. Not just mock exercises either. One team almost got eaten by a bear during wilderness survival training.""Bears are the least cost-effective game," Ernestine says. "They take too many bullets to kill and they're heavy as hell to drag back. And I don't need my commanding officer setting me up with men." "I'll take your word for me," you say. "So, we have the street performers and the games to look at. The street performers tend to be a diverse bunch, although I'm expecting there will be a few less this year. The games are almost impossible to win at - especially if you want something good - but it's always good fun to try and figure out how they're rigged. Or we could always go hunting, if you really want to.""I'll leave it to you," Ernestine says. "If you're going to ask a woman out, you should at least be decisive about it.">"Let's watch the performers. All the fun of going out to a festival without any of the effort." >"Let's see what the games have to offer. Maybe the hosts got creative with their cheating this year.">"Let's go hunting, if you kill something that bad. I have all the equipment at my place."
Wonderful to see you here, OP.>"Let's see what the games have to offer. Maybe the hosts got creative with their cheating this year."May aswell try and outwit them.
>>38936857>"Let's see what the games have to offer. Maybe the hosts got creative with their cheating this year."
>>38936857>>"Let's go hunting, if you kill something that bad. I have all the equipment at my place."
>>38936857>>"Let's see what the games have to offer. Maybe the hosts got creative with their cheating this year."
>>38936857"Let's see what the games have to offer," you say. "Maybe the hosts got creative with their cheating this year." "Probably not," Ernestine says. "Those are ancient trade secrets passed down from one carny to another for generations. They actually work, so there's no reason to change them." "We'll see about that," you say. "No matter how good they are, there's always a flaw.""Of course there is." Ernestine smiles. "But that doesn't mean you'll be able to find it."Ernestine takes your arm and you lead her to the game booths. The standard games are all there: throwing rings at pegs that are slightly too large, throwing balls at bottles that are filled with water, throwing darts at balloons - that one, you're sure how it's rigged. The only thing new is a game with pop guns that fire cork. It looks like the goal is to shoot the cork to tip the prize over. You've heard of that one, but you didn't think it'd show up in a small festival like this one. "Not bad," Ernestine says. "The classics are all there. Where do you want to start?">"Let's start with the ring toss.">"Let's start with the ball game.">"Let's start with the darts.">"Let's start with the cork guns."
>>38937341>"Let's start with the cork guns."
>>38937341>>"Let's start with the cork guns."
>"Let's start with the cork guns." Surely nothing bad can happen.
>>38937341"Let's start with the cork guns," you say. "This is the first time I've actually seen it. It might be interesting.""It doesn't look to complicated," Ernestine says. "If we can't win at that thing, we might as well retire from the Army.""We can't retire while there's a war," you say. "Not unless we want to get executed any day."Ernestine pulls you towards the stand. The owner, a portly middle-aged man, greets you as you get closer."Welcome, welcome," he says. "Welcome to my little stand. Five ducats gets you five shots. The game's simple. Any prize you can shoot down, you get to keep. How about it?"Most of the prizes are stuffed animals, but there are a few boxes with cheap jewellery. "We'll start with five shots each." You take out five ducats. "Ladies first."Ernestine takes one of the toy rifles and five cork bullets. She takes aim at one of the stuffed bears and shoots all her corks. The first misses, but the other four hit the bear straight on. However, the bear doesn't tilt back until the last shot. "Congratulations!" The owner takes the bear and gives it to Ernestine. "So that's how it's rigged," Ernestine says. "Good luck with that, Renard.""Thanks for that enlightening advice," you say.You pick up one of the toy rifles.>Aim for one of the stuffed toys. >Aim for one of the jewellery boxes.
>>38937870>Aim for one of the jewellery boxes.
>>38937870>>Aim for one of the stuffed toys.Jewellery is probably impossible.
>>38937870>>Aim for one of the jewellery boxes.It's the thought that counts.
>Aim for one of the jewellery boxes.Unless we're planning to drown our companion in stuffed animals, I say we try something else.
So you're going for the good stuff. I need 4d6.
Rolled 6, 3, 4, 1 = 14 (4d6)>>38938166
Rolled 5, 6, 1, 5 = 17 (4d6)>>38938166
Rolled 6, 5, 5, 2 = 18 (4d6)>>38938166
Rolled 2, 5, 4, 5 = 16 (4d6)>>38938166
>>38938166How does this new dice system work exactly?
>>38938214I'm still treating it as an experiment, but it's standard Fate rules. 1 and 2 on a d6 equal -6, 3 and 4 equal 0, and 5 and 6 equal +1. You add the bonus from the dice to your Skill bonus to get your total. I'm still calibrating the Skill bonuses, but this seems to be working well on my end. So far, the rolls are still in your favour, but success isn't as certain as it is with a d100.
>>38937870You decide to go for one of the jewellery boxes. It's definitely fake, but you're a little too old and respectable for stuffed animals, and if you do decide to give Ernestine something, a prize would be less shameful than buying something on the day of the Feast. You figure out the problem the minute you stuff the cork into the barrel: the fit is a little too tight. The cork wastes too much energy just shooting out of the gun, and if you don't fit the cork tightly, it'll throw off your shot. Ernestine either found the perfect fit to get as much force out of the cork as possible, or hitting the stuffed toy four times in a row was enough to tilt it back. You'll have to experiment. You aim at the top of one of the rectangular jewellery boxes and shoot, hoping that hitting the top will make it easier to throw the box off-balance. Unfortunately, the cork just bounces off. The box must be propped up by something. It takes a paranoid carny to rig his game twice just in case.However, this is easy to deal with. You slide over a little to the left and aim for the left side of the box. This time, the cork has just enough force to give the box some torque and it spins sideways. For a second, it looks like the box is going to stay balanced, but then it tilts over a little and falls. "Congratulations, sir!" The stand owner gives you the box, which contains a small golden chain. It's nothing spectacular, but it still looks fairly nice. "That was easier than I expected," you say. "I guess all that battlefield experience counts for something.""I'm impressed," Ernestine says. "I thought it'd be a lot harder to get the good prizes. Where to next?" >"Let's go for the ring toss.">"Let's go for the ball game." >"Let's go for the darts."
>>38938534>"Let's go for the ball game."
>>38938534>>"Let's go for the darts."
>>38938534>>"Let's go for the ball game."
>>38938534>>"Let's go for the darts."A game of accuracy between snipers, let's keep it going.
>>38938534>"Let's go for the darts."
>>38938534"Let's try the darts," you say. "I'm in the mood to throw sharp things." "Sounds great!"Ernestine follows you to the dart stand. There are quite a few people there already, so you get to watch and learn from their mistakes, and learning from other people's mistakes is the best way to learn. The game is five ducats for five darts, same as the corks. There's a wide range of men, women and children playing, but they have a hard time popping the rubber balloons even when the darts hit. "What do you think?" Ernestine asks."Either the darts or the balloons are rigged," you say. "The balloons can be made thicker, or they can be deflated a little so the air inside is under less pressure. That would make it harder for the balloons to pop. The darts can be made heavier to throw their aim off, or they can be blunted to reduce their force on impact." "Getting thicker balloons would be too difficult unless you know the supplier and they look big, so they're probably not deflated," Ernestine says. "That leaves the darts. Heavier darts would be more likely to pop the balloons, but the balloons aren't popping even when the darts hit. That leaves blunted darts as the most likely cheat." "So the balloons will still pop so long as there's enough force behind the throw," you say. "That shouldn't be too hard to pull off." "You certainly sound confident," Ernestine says. "How about a bet? You get to call the stakes.">"I could always use another underwear doll.">"Loser makes lunch?" >"Keep it simple. Fifty ducats."
>>38939032>>"Loser makes lunch?"
>>38939032>>"I could always use another underwear doll."
>>38939032>"Loser makes lunch?"
Going for lunch. Roll 4d6.
Rolled 5, 1, 6, 4 = 16 (4d6)>>38939414
Rolled 2, 5, 4, 5 = 16 (4d6)>>38939414
Rolled 1, 2, 2, 2 = 7 (4d6)>>38939414
Rolled 5, 1, 1, 3 = 10 (4d6)>>38939414
>>38939032"Loser makes lunch?" You ask. "We should be able to buy some ingredients and we can use the kitchen at my place.""Deal," Ernestine says. "Let's get to it." You wait for the crowd to disperse a little before stepping forward."Welcome!" The person running the stand this time is a woman. "The game is five darts for five ducats! The more balloons you pop, the bigger the prize! Who wants to go next?""We'll try it." You hand the woman ten ducats and split the darts evenly with Ernestine. Both of you have the same idea. You step back and pull your arms back as far as possible. The crowd and the owner instinctively step back to give you more space to work with. You move your left foot forward and use it to pivot your body while whipping your right arm forward to throw the dart. With the full weight of your body behind the throw, the balloons pop no matter how dull the darts are. The force of the dart is just too great. Both you and Ernestine pop a balloon with your first dart. It's hell on your shoulder - and most of the other joints in your body for that matter - but it works. You hit again with your second, third and fourth darts. So does Ernestine. You have one dart left to break your time. You throw another dart forward, this time aiming for two balloons that overlap. Both of them shatter. Ernestine, however, misses her last throw. She sighs and rubs her shoulder. Her strength must have run out. "Congratulations on your victory!" Your prizes are two quaint paintings of the Gallian countryside. Yours is slightly bigger than Ernestine's.You're quite certain lunch will be better. "Are you alright?" You ask Ernestine. "You look like you almost dislocated your shoulder.""I'll be fine," Ernestine says. "I'll just need you to carry this around while we go buy ingredients. We're going to need unleavened bread, eggs and a really fat chicken. Let's go!">(1/2)
>>38939767Ernestine sends you running around all the stores that are still open until you find everything she needs to cook lunch, then you return to your mansion to get the broth ready. Ernestine considers canned chicken stock to be an unacceptable substitute for the real thing. "Welcome back, young master." Dezra greets you as you return. "I didn't expect you back so soon." "Dezra, this is Ernestine, Ernestine, this is Dezra." Ernestine acknowledges your butler with a polite nod. "We're here for lunch, so you don't need to worry about us. Go out and enjoy yourself."Dezra looks at Ernestine curiously, but doesn't say anything. He bows and lets you go about your business. Ernestine quickly strips the chicken and stuffs the bones in a pot of water to get the broth started. "This'll take a while," she says.>"I'm sure it'll be delicious.">"Want me to have a look at your shoulder?">"Want me to give you a tour while we wait?"
>>38939872>"Want me to have a look at your shoulder?"
>>38939872>>"Want me to have a look at your shoulder?"
>>38939872"Want me to have a look at your shoulder?" "Might as well," Ernestine says. "It's not so bad, but with my luck, I'll have cramps for days if I don't take care of it. We're the only ones here right?" "I told Dezra to have fun at the festival, so yeah, we'll be alone for a while." "Good, this would be embarrassing otherwise." With that, Ernestine sits down and nonchalantly takes off her jacket and her shirt, leaving only her underwear to cover her chest. You try not to stare, but not very hard."So… I guess black is all you wear?" "It goes well with everything," she says. "My shoulder?"You take a look at her shoulder and how it rotates. It's a little sensitive, but it doesn't look sprained. "It should be fine if you relax and don't do any more strenuous exercise," you say. "I wasn't planning on weightlifting today," Ernestine says. "Now give me my clothes back, you can stare at my chest after lunch.">Give Ernestine her shirt. >Give Ernestine the golden chain first.
>>38940336>Give Ernestine the golden chain first.
>>38940336"Take this first," you say. "Sorry it's so cheap."You take the chain out of its box and place it around Ernestine's neck."Thank you," she says. "I don't mind that it's cheap. The way you won it makes up for it." You give Ernestine her clothes back so she can get dressed and she returns to looking over her soup. You help prepare the chicken and the other ingredients. Once the broth is ready, Ernestine adds the chicken meat and fat and starts rolling the bread into balls, which she adds to the soup in the final step. It takes less than half an hour more for the soup to be ready. "This is traditional Darcsen food," she says. "The taste isn't strange or anything, so you shouldn't hate it." "It smells great." Ernestine pours you both a bowl of soup and you sit at the kitchen table. The soup tastes like normal chicken soup, but it feels warmer and more filling than you'd expect. You mostly eat in silence and Ernestine looks up at you a few times. >(1/2)
>>38941003"This is really good," you say. "It's simple, but it's comforting." "Thanks," Ernestine says. "You know, I like being a Darcsen." There are several responses you could make to this, but you don't know exactly which ones won't get you punched in the face, so you start chewing very slowly and nod to show you're paying attention. "A lot of Darcsen don't," Ernestine continues. "A lot want to become like other Gallians. Some talk about how we should have our own nation, but all they really want is power. My parents just taught me to do things my own way. I didn't join the Gallian Army because of General Gunther's Darcsen integration policy. I just wanted a job I could be good at." "I know the feeling," you say. "I like to think that I can live up to my family's responsibilities, but I know a lot of nobles don't or can't.""I think it's good enough that you can think about that," Ernestine says. "I just wanted you to know that I'm not looking for something stupid like a better lot in life, so if you invited me to your room for sex, I wouldn't have any unrealistic expectations, and I wouldn't mind treating it as a casual thing if that's what you want. And I'd accept immediately." That was... not subtle. >"We don't have to wait until tonight.">"I don't think that's a good idea.">"I'm interested, but it can wait."
>>38941034>"We don't have to wait until tonight."
>>38941034>"I'm interested, but it can wait."
>>38941034>>"We don't have to wait until tonight."
And /tg/'s going for it. Roll 4d6.
Rolled 3, 6, 6, 5 = 20 (4d6)>>38941360Let's hit it.
Rolled 5, 3, 6, 4 = 18 (4d6)>>38941360
Rolled 5, 2, 5, 3 = 15 (4d6)>>38941360
Rolled 1, 1, 2, 2 = 6 (4d6)>>38941360>Unrealistic expectations;_;
>>38941535Good lord what an awful roll
>>38941034"You know, we don't have to wait until tonight." You calmly gather your dishes and set them aside. "We might run out of time.""Who cares about hollow bragging?" Ernestine scoffs. "I know what your physical training is. There's no way you can last that long." Ernestine stands up to set her dishes. You wrap your arms around her stomach and gently nibble on her ear. "We could always bet on it," you say. "Fine," Ernestine says. "Let's see if you can last an hour." The next thing you know, she has her arms and legs wrapped around you and she slips her tongue into your mouth.Five hours later, you're both covered in sweat on your bed. The bedsheets are… somewhere along with all the wet towels you had to use to clean up. Ernestine is sprawled on top of you, half-panting, half-giggling madly. "You win that one," she says. "That was a lot better than when I have to do it myself. I'm not sure if I'll even be able to walk tomorrow." "I don't mind carrying you around," you say. You kiss Ernestine and gently stroke her back until you both fall asleep. You wake up the next morning to the sound of Dezra knocking on your door. "Young master, a missive has arrived for you.""I'll be down soon," you yell. You take stock of the situation. One, your room is a mess and there is a naked woman on top of you.Two, your team probably came back from the festival at some point last night. Three… fortunately, there is no third point that you can think. Ernestine cracks one eye open."I'm guessing this is going to be awkward," she says. >"You can sneak out after I head down.">"We had a one night stand that'll probably last more than one night. It's not a big deal.">"Oh, we can make this more awkward. Let's go mess with my team."
>>38941802>>"Oh, we can make this more awkward. Let's go mess with my team."
>>38941802>"Oh, we can make this more awkward. Let's go mess with my team."
>>38941802"Oh, we can make this more awkward," you say. "Let's go mess with my team. You can start by putting on one of my shirts. I'll stuff your clothes in a bag or something.""You're an idiot." Ernestine sticks out her tongue at you. "Just hand me my underwear and my pants, at least." "Sure," you say. "They're over here somewhere." The convenient part of five hours of depraved sex is that there's no point in having any sense of shame when getting dressed again afterwards. You and Ernestine - who is obviously wearing one of your shirts - walk down to the first floor dining room. "Good morning, everyone!" You yell as loudly as you can. "It's time for breakfast! Dezra, where's that missive?" Dezra looks awkwardly between you and Ernestine. "Young master-" "The letter, Dezra! We have a war to win here!" And you don't have time for a lecture on the proprieties of procreation. "Yes, young master." Dezra hands you a military letter, which you break open. You sit down on the couch and deftly pull Ernestine onto your lap. She peers down to read the letter as well. >(1/2)
>>38942468Your whole team is staring at you, aside from Roberta, who doesn't seem like she could possibly care any less. She's probably seen this before. The rest of them are squirming. You can tell they want to ask and even if none of them have the balls to do it, it's just a matter of time before one of them cracks. "Soooooo…" And Nina is the first to give in to the pressure. "Can you tell us what your friend is doing here?" You peer at her over the letter without even moving your head."I just said it was breakfast time, Nina," you say. "Didn't you pay attention?" "I hope it's good," Ernestine says. "We really shouldn't have skipped dinner.""Who said anything about skipping dinner?" You ask. "You were delicious."The awkwardness has now reached the point where no one is looking at you. Except for Vanesssa, but her face is bright red and she seems to be semi-catatonic, so it doesn't really count. "I guess those are our new orders?" Jetje asks. You can't tell if she's talking to you or her teacup. "Yes." You fold the letter back and stuff in your pocket. "Hey, do you all remember when I lied about us going to the desert just to mess with you? I'm retroactively declaring that a training exercise for our upcoming assignment to the Barious Desert! Are you glad I made sure you were prepared?" "Is there any good news for those of us who didn't get laid last night?" Karl asks. "Not nearly, as good, no," you say. "But we are being assigned to General Belgen Gunther's command, and he's assigning us a tank. Since the current policy is to assign tanks to first lieutenants, I'm getting a courtesy promotion. I guess that means I still come out ahead of all of you.""That was bad," William says. "That was bad and you should feel bad for just thinking about it."
>>38942486And that's all for today. Next thread will be next Wednesday at around 7PM EST. We'll be heading back to the war with desert battles. Good night and thanks for playing.
>>38942550Thanks for the run.
>>38942550Good thread. Renard is hilarious
>>38942550Good thread, wish I got here earlier.