>>40296118
GREG
HE'S GOT 3 HUMOR, AND HE'S THE FASTEST

Come on Greg, it's time to go FAST.

>>40296118
>greg
>weaker than both girls even with -4 str
ohwow.jpg

>>40296118
Greg. All the way.

>>40296245
>>40296284
>>40296293
Greg hops into your car with his trademark toothy grin, and flips the bird at Tayana, who makes an L on her forehead. "Manners, kids," you say, in the voice of someone who knows they won't be heard.

Greg turns to you and says, "Where to today, Dad?"
>We're going home to pick some stuff up. [Equip]
>We're gonna take a walk around the neighborhood. [Battle]
>We're gonna go play whack-the-dummy. [Training/Tutorial]

>>40296291
He sacrificed it all for go fast.

>>40296311
>Play Whack-The-Dummy

Let's get some training in.

>>40296311
>We're gonna go play whack-the-dummy. [Training/Tutorial]

>>40296311
>We're going home to pick some stuff up. [Equip]
We need to get me heelys.

>>40296328
>>40296324
You drive to the park, a "no-fighting" safe zone where children are free to train their combat instincts without fear of pain. There, an animated dummy awaits you to be beaten mercilessly. Greg hops out of the car, over the fence, and assumes his fighting stance, awaiting your command.

Due to his superior SPEED, Greg acts first.
>HIT: Pretty self-explanatory! Greg's STRENGTH is too low to offer more advanced options.
>DEFEND: Greg can BLOCK, DODGE, FEINT, or TUMBLE. BLOCKing reduces damage on a successful hit, DODGing worsens opponents' hit chances, FEINT gives an advantage to your next attack, and TUMBLing, if successful, combines the effects of a DODGE and a FEINT.
>MAKE BELIEVE: Greg can AGGRESS for a direct attack or TRANSFORM for a temporary physical stat boost.
>JOKE: Greg cannot LAUGH IT OFF, being at his full humor of 3.0, but he can CRACK WISE on his opponent's STRENGTH or IMAGINATION.

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>>40296458
fuck, forgot the image

>>40296458
>DEFEND: TUMBLE

>>40296471
Greg kind of fucks up the tumble, but he's hard to hit anyway, and the dummy misses its attack.

You've examined the DEFEND option, and now you should try out one of the other three:

>HIT
>MAKE BELIEVE
>JOKE

>>40296519
>>MAKE BELIEVE

>>40296528
"Try making believe!" you shout to Greg, and Greg grins wider, shifts his posture, and roars gutturally. He's attempting a TRANSFORM! "I'M A BIG, STRONG BEAR!" Greg shouts, and for a moment you can almost see it. For two rounds, Greg's effective STRENGTH is 2.

The dummy misses again.

>HIT has a new option, PUMMEL, which allows Greg to attempt as many attacks as he has SPEED.
>JOKE

>>40296572
>>JOKE

>>40296572
>>JOKE
you crack that wise boy.

>>40296464
BELIEVE

>>40296572
> Pummel!

Dang, why'd this quest have to start so late at night? I like the concept and art.

>>40296572
>PUMMEL EVERYTHING

>>40296572
Joke.

>>40296598
>>40296615
>>40296617
>>40296627
>>40296640
"Go for a PUMMEL!" you shout, and Greg hits four times out of four. (The damage is sort of irrelevant, given that the dummy is essentially indestructible.) The last shot is a critical hit, and the dummy stumbles away clutching its burlap head, losing its turn. Greg takes the opportunity to CRACK WISE on the dummy's IMAGINATION: "Whatcha got in that head of yours to hurt? Looks pretty empty to me!"

Not his best, but the dummy looks suitably offended.

You clap Greg on the shoulder and lead him back to the car.
>[Equip]
>[Battle]
>Time to do your homework, kiddo. [Training]

>>40296673
>Equip

Let's check our gear.

>>40296673
>[Equip]

>>40296673
We should buy Greg an ice cream as a reward for the spar. you did good, kid.

>>40296774
No! We don't want to spoil him.

>>40296770
>>40296683
>>40296774
You offer Greg an ice cream and his eyes light up. "Really, Dad?" "Yeah, really, kiddo, you earned it." But he knows, and you know, that unlike the school and the park, the ice cream parlor is not a safe zone, and it doesn't pay to go out unprotected.

So you head home, kiss your spouse on the cheek, and follow Greg up the stairs- which he takes two at a time- to his room, where his equipment is stored.

In his closet are a bunch of clothes that are good for going to school but don't do much for his stats. There's also:
>a leather patch-covered jacket that's +1 to HUMOR
>a bear suit that comes in two parts, hood/hat and body onesie. (Greg has a favorite animal.) The hat and body alone grant +1 to IMAGINATION each, and together grant the power to remain transformed into a bear indefinitely- or until someone debuffs him, at which point another TRANSFORM is required.
>an electric guitar that's +2 to IMAGINATION and gives him a new set of MAKE BELIEVE options.
>some heelies that are +1 to SPEED.
>brass knuckles that are +1 to STRENGTH.
>a wizard hat that's +2 to IMAGINATION.

(Common sense dictates that some of these items cannot be used simultaneously- notably the onesie, which covers the hands, feet, and torso- no weapon, no shoes, no jacket. Greg can manipulate one weapon at a time, so he can't have both the brass knuckles and the guitar equipped. And he can only be wearing one hat. In practical terms, of course, he can wear whatever the fuck he wants, but the stat gain system cannot be gamed in this way- he gets the stat bonuses of only one item per slot.)

>>40296917
Heelies.

(this quest going on much longer? You picked a bad time of day. I really want to sleep...

>>40296917
>Electric Guitar

>>40296957
Yeah, I know, this really is an awful time to be doing this. I'm keeping it up until I have other shit to do, but you don't have to stay up with me. I'll have the thread(s) available to read as .zips or whatever at worst- my email is salivary.amylase.Na.Cl at gmail.com if you want to go to bed and read it later.

>>40297001
Put it on SupTG and I'll find it later.

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html

Site for archiving quest threads.

Also I find it hilarious that this kid is going to have like 30 parents.

>>40297045
We are a very compassionate family.

>>40296917
>an electric guitar that's +2 to IMAGINATION and gives him a new set of MAKE BELIEVE options.
ROCK ON

>>40296917
>some heelie
>an electric guitar that's +2 to IMAGINATION and gives him a new set of MAKE BELIEVE options.s that are +1 to SPEED.
>a wizard hat that's +2 to IMAGINATION.

He must become a radical speed wizard of some kind

>>40296957
>>40296989
>>40297149
You get out the heelies and the electric guitar, with the jacket thrown in for good measure. You attempt to convince him to wear the wizard's hat, since, without the onesie, it's objectively better stat-wise than the bear hat, but who are you to stand between your boy and his favorite hat?

Now you're ready to ROCK!

The ice cream parlor is right in the neighborhood, so you decide to walk. On your way, you run into Greg's friend's mom, Yesenia, with her kid Manuel in a bald eagle costume.

You and Yesenia are buds, and she smiles and waves. "Hey there, neighbor! Wanna fight?"

>Sure!
>Hell no, we're going to get ice cream.

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>>40297217
hoo boy, I'm good at this image thing

>>40297217
Sure!

So this is basically pokemon but with Humans, yeah? Better be a good neighbor and have our children hurt eachother.

>>40297217
>Sure!
He might even earn himself a double scoop

>>40297217
>Sure!
can we do "that" thing from mad max with the guitar?

>>40297217
Sure.

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>>40297249
>>40297233
>>40297231
>>40297227
Manuel and Greg square off, sizing each other up. Greg acts first, due to his superior SPEED.

>HIT
>DEFEND
>MAKE BELIEVE: SHRED, WALL OF SOUND, FEEDBACK, POWER CHORD
>JOKE

>>40297339
>MAKE BELIEVE: POWER CHORD

>>40297339
>MAKE BELIEVE: WALL OF SOUND

>>40297339
>MAKE BELIEVE: POWER CHORD

>>40297339
POWER CHORD

I SAY POWER!!!

>>40297223
>bear hat with hole for mohawk
this is perfect. you are a wonderful human being.

>>40297339
>MAKE BELIEVE: WALL OF SOUND

>>40297339
>>40297348
>>40297355
>>40297373
Greg launches into the iconic opening riff to Smoke on the Water, and the air crackles with sonic power, making whatever follows that much more effective. Then you hear a shriek- KEEE-AAAWWW- and for like a second you think there must actually be a bird of prey nearby. It's just Manuel, but wow, it's uncanny. Manuel is using TRANSFORM to become an eagle, unsurprisingly, and gains +3 SPEED indefinitely. He's now nearly equal to Greg in SPEED, which is a little unnerving... but then again, in their equipment, Greg's nearly his equal in IMAGINATION.

Greg then begins to jam out, and the guitar fuzz grows to form a WALL OF SOUND blocking damage. A formidable move! You smile to yourself.

Manuel is unperturbed. He merely flaps his wings and says, in a voice eerily like that of a parrot, "No matter. The ground is now quicksand."

Oh, SHIT. Greg realizes immediately what's happened- his heelies are useless in the quicksand, and worse, he's sinking fast. His SPEED advantage is nuked!

>HIT
>DEFEND
>MAKE BELIEVE
>JOKE

HIT, let's ko the bitch

>>40297408
>CRACK WISE
look at this guy, trying to slow our kid down.

>>40297408
>>JOKE

Crack wise on that dangerous imagination. Or laugh it off? Some defendy thing.

>>40297408
Dive into the quicksand!

Manuel obviously relying on using ground based status effects then taking flight and attacking from the air.

We'll reverse this back on him - take shelter in the ground, then:
>MAKE BELIEVE: THE AIR IS NOW LAVA

Put the title of the quest somewhere in the OP next time so I can find it more easily. Search doesn't work in thread subject or name.

>>40297433
>>40297439
Manuel acts first, since he has the SPEED advantage. "I am the powerful Thunderbird of my people! I call upon the force of Storm! CRACKOW!" It overcomes the WALL OF SOUND to deal .6 damage. Greg is now at 3.4 HUMOR.

Greg CRACKS WISE on Manuel's IMAGINATION. "Is that thunder? Or is it just your fat ass shaking the ground? Or maybe just your overpowering flatulence, huh?"

You clench your fist and smile. That's your boy.

Manuel wobbles and looks hurt. That burn was so bad, not only is he now de-TRANSFORMED (and also mired in the quicksand), but he lost .4 HUMOR as well, leaving him at 1.6.

>HIT
>DEFEND
>MAKE BELIEVE
>JOKE

>>40297482
Ah, okay, thanks.

>>40297505
Defend with a Tumble.

>MAKE BELIEVE
time to roast that bird MAD MAX style

>>40297045
Most children I'll ever have even if it is divided by 30

>>40297528
There's currently 16 posters, so you're dividing up this kid with 15 other people.

>>40297505
>Hit
Now that you have the speed advantage again, it's time to overpower him!

>>40297542
0.0666 of a child!

Use Hit!

Rolled 16 (1d100)

Pummel: use our speed!
Also random rolling!

Shout to other parent: Whoever kid's loses has to buy the winner ice cream!

>>40297654
>>40297665
>>40297422
>>40297542
>>40297517
"HIT him good, Greg!" you shout. Caught in the quicksand and flailing around, Manuel critically fails his dodge and essentially smashes his face into Greg's swinging guitar. BZANG! Manuel's down to 1.0 HUMOR and spends his turn clutching his head. Greg MAKES BELIEVE a jet of fire from his guitar, dealing another .6 damage, and Manuel is down to a teetering .4 HUMOR.

"Finish him!" you shout, and tell your boy to ready a...

>HIT
>DEFEND
>MAKE BELIEVE
>JOKE

>>40297731
>DEFEND
>TUMBLE
Gotta go fast!

>>40297749
Greg's TUMBLE maneuver doesn't do him any good about dodging attacks, but it does put him in an advantageous position for an attack next round. In tears, Manuel swings his fist- but misses. Greg is behind Manuel and in the ideal position to
>HIT
or
>MAKE BELIEVE
offensively.

>>40297836
>MAKE BELIEVE
Time to finish this.

>>40297852
Greg SHREDS the remains of Manuel's HUMOR, and Manuel taps out. You get some ice from the house to help Yesenia tend to Manuel's bruised cheek as Greg sits and LAUGHS IT OFF, returning Manuel's humor to its usual 2.0. You extend the offer of ice cream to Manuel, causing him to perk up considerably, and the four of you walk to the ice cream parlor laughing at Yesenia's story of her husband's burning the dinner on Mother's Day.

>[continued in a sec, I've got to eat something]

>>40297924
There's a big hubbub in the ice cream parlor- the patrons are crowded, chattering excitedly, in a circle around something equally noisy. Eventually the chatter turns into a chant- "Tayme-liAH! Tayme-liAH! Tayme-liAH!"

Two parents lead their crying, bruised children by the hand out of the crowd as the chanting continues. As they go to the ice cream counter and order their kids sundaes, you and Yesenia look at each other, confused. The kids seem to know what's up, though; Greg groans and Manuel shakes his head.

"What's going on?" Yesenia asks. "Taymelia, it's what Tayana and Amelia call their fighting team."

Greg grunts in annoyance. "I can't stand Tayana." He rolls his eyes and crosses his arms. "I guess she and Amelia make a pretty good team, though."

The crowd begins to dissipate, fading back to their seats, and Tayana and Amelia and two adults who you presume are their parents remain.

"Hello, Greg," says Tayana, smirking, and you place your hand on Greg's shoulder. Easy, kiddo.

>Challenge Taymelia. [Battle]
>Get your ice cream. [Reconnaissance]

>>40298117
>Get your ice cream. [Reconnaissance]
We promised a kid icecream, so we gonna give him icecream.
After that...

>>40298117
>>Get your ice cream. [Reconnaissance]

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>>40298140
>>40298148
"Greg, remember your manners," you chide, and Greg sullenly says, "Hello, Tayana." You smile at Tayana's dad and Amelia's mom and move decisively towards the ice cream counter.

After buying Greg a mint chocolate chip/pistachio doublescoop and a peanut butter gelato for Manuel, you discreetly glance over your shoulder to get a better idea of who you're up against.

Taymelia are certainly decked out impressively. Tayana's got on a full wrestler's kit, complete with monogrammed champion's belt and high-top sneakers. No weapon, though- it looks like she trusts in her fists. Amelia's achieving the rare clown-ballerina-fairy princess triple threat with her floofy polka-dot dress, sparkly star-capped wand, pointe shoes that look like they've been dyed in blood beribboned up the calf, and clown nose- probably for the HUMOR boost. Given what you know about these two, it looks like they've elected to play up their strong suits- a smart choice, given that they're fighting together and their strengths are so complementary.

Yesenia whispers to you, "I've got another outfit for Manuel in my bag, I'll send him to change in the bathroom." You raise your eyebrows. "So Manuel's in for a double battle against Tayana and Amelia?" you ask. Manuel nods, and takes another spoon of gelato.

You look over to your left at the pair who just lost to Taymelia. Making to reach for a napkin, you make eye contact with one of the fight mothers, and she nods, then pulls out a pen and scribbles something on the napkin that she then hands to you. OCCUPY AMELIA, it says. Fair advice.

>[continued]

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>>40298398
When you look up from the napkin, Manuel's seat is empty and Yesenia's bag isn't on her shoulder. You tap your fingers with anxiety for a few minutes as Greg eats his ice cream-soaked cone. Eventually Manuel reenters from the bathroom and gives his mom back her bag. He's wearing a Flash mask, boxing gloves, wingèd sandals, and a pool floatie with a hippo face on it. Unprompted, Yesenia informs you that the stat gains are advantageous.

Well, you've delayed as long as you can. There's nothing left to do but make the choice: stay and fight, or try to leave while you still can?

>Stay [Battle]
>Try to leave [Battle]

>>40298855
>Stay

Let's do this.

>>40298855
Onwards, to Battle!

>>40298855
>Stay [Battle]
Earn our love kiddo!

>>40298855
it's time to b-b-b-battle!

>>40298855
Hm, that outfit has the effect of making him well rounded rather than maximising his glass cannon effect. I'm not sure how that's gonna match up with the girls.

>>40299072
Well considering their damage output, he needs to cover his weaknesses.

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>>40298865
>>40298920
>>40298964
>>40298978
The four of you rise from the bar and walk over to Tayana and Amelia's table, where they sit with their parents and their milkshakes- strawberry for Tayana, banana for Amelia. You smile warmly at Tayana's dad and ask, "Would you care to fight? My Gregory and Mrs. Rivera's Manuel versus the famed Taymelia?"

Tayana's dad returns the warm smile and shakes your hand firmly. "It would be a pleasure," he says. Tayana and Amelia finish their milkshakes as the adults introduce themselves- Duane Smith is Tayana's dad, Maisie Jenkins Amelia's mother- and you go to the black-and-white tiled battle floor and square off.

A crowd gathers to watch. Whatever happens here, everyone's gonna know about it tomorrow.

Greg has the speed advantage and acts first.
>HIT
>DEFEND
>MAKE BELIEVE
>JOKE

>>40299072
I kinda fucked up when statting out Manuel- SPEED is the to-hit stat, and his weakest, which restricts his use of IMAGINATION to area-of-effect attacks and renders his STRENGTH essentially worthless. In essence he's operating at half-efficiency as compared to... every other character. In future iterations of this quest, the to-hit stat will probably be attack-specific to make slow builds more viable.

>>40299435
Can you specify the suboptions for each category for grey and manuel? I'm not sure what they can do after their stat boosts and equipment loadouts.

>>40299435
Hit.

>>40299435
>JOKE
something something -4 Str at Tanya, otherwise she's gonna smack our shit

>>40299435
Crackwise

>>40299468
Whoops, yeah. First thing that you may find helpful is that you don't HAVE to give Manuel orders unless you really have a great idea- Yesenia (me) will give him commands independently. Second thing you may find helpful is that, especially in the MAKE BELIEVE and JOKE categories, creative write-ins are totally valid- if I think it's good I'll use it, even if I alter some details to fit what I think the kids are capable of. (If it's REALLY good, I'll give it an all caps name and make it a permanent option.)

>HIT:
>>1. STRIKE: Simple physical attack, and the only option for HIT available to Greg at the moment.
>>2. PUMMEL: Make as many attack attempts as your SPEED stat.
>>3. BLUDGEON: If successful, lower SPEED or STRENGTH along with your attack.
>>4. KNOCKOUT: If successful, opponent loses turn.
>With the boxing gloves:
>>DEFENSIVE STRIKE: Simultaneous BLOCK and STRIKE.

>DEFEND:
>>1. BLOCK: If an attack hits on a turn when you're BLOCKing, damage is reduced.
>>2. DODGE: Additional chance to dodge.
>>3. FEINT: You gain an advantage to hit and damage on your next turn, if successful.
>>4. TUMBLE: Simultaneous FEINT and DODGE.

>MAKE BELIEVE:
>>1. AGGRESS: Attack one character.
>>2. TRANSFORM: Boost a physical stat- and for the particularly imaginative, gain additional techniques- by transforming into an appropriate creature.
>With the electric guitar:
>>SHRED: An improved AGGRESS.
>>WALL OF SOUND: If successful, reduces damage for a few turns.
>>FEEDBACK: Used to give a status effect to the character that gave it to you.
>>POWER CHORD: Confers additional success to same-team music-based effects that follow.

>JOKE:
>>1. LAUGH IT OFF: Heal a character, including yourself.
>>2. CRACK WISE on STRENGTH: lower STRENGTH and potentially cancel a STRENGTH-powered effect
>>3. CRACK WISE on IMAGINATION: lower IMAGINATION and potentially cancel an IMAGINATION-powered effect
>>4. JIBE: Lower a stat of choice and attack HUMOR.

# = min stat

>>40299670
Thanks.
My vote then is for
>WALL OF SOUND

>>40299563
>>40299572
"JIBE her STRENGTH!" you shout, and Greg begins to Do His Thing. "Hey Tayana, don't they put that kinda headgear on babies with squishy bones? Have you got squishy bones, Tayana? It must be hard to fight with those squishy bones you've got there." Tayana's STRENGTH is untouched, but her HUMOR takes a hit- she's at 2.6.

Tayana darts forward, muttering something about your smart mouth, as she throws a left-right-left- and the second right hook lands, dealing a whole 1.0 HUMOR. You're at 3.0 HUMOR.

Manuel makes a DEFENSIVE STRIKE on Amelia, hitting her square in the jaw to deal .8 damage. Amelia is at 4.2 HUMOR.

Amelia SHARES A LAUGH I just made this up lmao, it's a 4-minimum whole-team heal with Tayana, healing them both for .4 HUMOR. Tayana is at 3.0 HUMOR, Amelia is at 4.6.

>HIT
>DEFEND
>MAKE BELIEVE
>JOKE

I'm counting old votes if anyone votes for them again.

>>40299670
They already gave us a tip, to occupy amelia. She's the one going to debuff and wreck our collective shit.

Greg! Make believe that you're on a bike with your leathers! Run circles round Amelia and confuse/distract her whilst Manuel takes care of Tayana!

>>40299829
>MAKE BELIEVE
>TRANSFORM into BEAROQUE STAR
(Geddit? Cus of the hat and the guitar?)

Wall of Sound

>>40299849
This.

>>40299849
>>40299522
Greg gets an idea, and settles into position for motorcycle riding. "Vroom, vroom," he says, pumping the gas, and he enhances his SPEED by +2 for a full 7 turns (or until he's debuffed). Greg's STRENGTH is now high enough to act twice in a turn, which he can take advantage of this turn after everyone else has had their first.

Tayana makes a BLUDGEON attempt on Greg's SPEED and is... very successful, unfortunately. Greg's SPEED is down to 1. Greg will regain SPEED at the rate of one point a turn, but may not take another action this turn. Yikes, dice are a bitch! Also I didn't anticipate Tayana being this effective when I gave the advice, sorry for misleading y'all.

Manuel makes a BLUDGEON attempt on Tayana's STRENGTH. He misses by a hair.

Amelia JIBES Manuel's SPEED. "Hey Manuel, sure sucks you need two items to be usefully quick!" It's clumsy and Manuel shrugs it off without a thought.

Tayana misses her next turn squatting over Greg with a concerned look on her face.

Amelia AGGRESSES Manuel with a firebolt, but misses harmlessly.

Manuel makes a BLUDGEON attempt on the inattentive Tayana's STRENGTH. Unfortunately, while the blow lands, it doesn't impact Tayana's STRENGTH. Fortunately, it deals the max value of 1.0 damage, lowering Tayana to 2.0 HUMOR.

Greg JIBES Tayana's STRENGTH. "Compassion is a sign of weakness," he hisses out into her face. Her face crumples, dealing .8 damage- lowering her to a mere 1.2 HUMOR- and her STRENGTH falls by two.

That was an eventful couple of rounds, wow.
>HIT
>DEFEND
>MAKE BELIEVE
>JOKE

>>40300036
Uh. Whoops, name fell off.

>>40300036
>>HIT

>>40300036
Oh, and Greg's at 2.4 HUMOR post-BLUDGEON.

>>40300036
>JOKE
Gank Tayana til she's down time.
JIBE: That belt wrapped tight to keep your paunch tucked in or what?
I suck at jibes

>>40300083
Tayana PUMMELS Greg while screaming- every punch lands. She K.O.s Greg. You run onto the battlefloor and drag Greg away to begin tending to his wounds.

Manuel makes a BLUDGEON attempt on Tayana's STRENGTH and gets a critical hit. Tayana is immobilized, and she takes .6 damage to leave her at .6 HUMOR.

Amelia attempts to SHARE A LAUGH with Tayana, but her laughter rings hollow and spills off into sobs.

Tayana lies on the ground in silence. Theoretically she could make a verbal attack, but it doesn't look like she has anything to say.

Manuel turns to Amelia and MAKES BELIEVE that she is tied up with rope, with no success.

Amelia AGGRESSES Manuel with a lightning bolt, but misses by a hair.

Tayana attempts to STRIKE Manuel, but fails.

Manuel makes a FEAR ATTACK on Amelia with a swarm of spiders. The attack itself misses, but the fear effect succeeds profoundly, and Amelia misses her next two turns.

Tayana attempts to STRIKE Manuel, but misses.

Manuel BLUDGEONS Tayana's STRENGTH. He K.O.'s her, and Mr. Smith takes her body off the battlefloor.

Manuel MAKES BELIEVE that he is a firing squad. Amelia, helpless with fear, cannot resist the instant kill attack and taps out.

You won. Yay.

>>40300297
>Manuel MAKES BELIEVE that he is a firing squad
Daaaaaayum.

Well, I guess we kinda fullfilled our roll as the tank.
And hey, we beat Manuel in a 1v1 so I guess that makes us the overall victor, right guys?

>>40300297
>>40300346
Manuel my man

so do we still have exp and item for winning

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>>40300346
That particular move- and any instant-kill attack- usually Will Not Work, on the scale of "success happens only on 1 out of 1000 tries". But I adjudicated that Amelia's status effects made her unable to resist.

>>40300297
>>40300403
You made some cash today, which will allow you to buy some new equipment, and experience is handed out all around.

-----

The first thing Greg says when he wakes up breaks your heart.

"Sorry, dad."

"For what?" you say, stroking the unbruised part of his face.

"For... you know."

"You can't always win, son. Sometimes you tap out. And sometimes you K.O.. It sucks when it happens, but it does happen, and there's no sense feeling guilt or shame about it."

Greg smiles gently- not his usual toothy grin, and that breaks your heart too- and closes his eyes. The lids are so swollen it's hard to tell.

You lean forward and kiss his forehead.

"You'll be fighting again in no time, kiddo."

ARC END

>Begin new arc.
>Leave off for now.

>>40300403
Well in Pokemon you still get the exp.
And this seems kind of similar to Pokemon.

>>40300500
>New ARC, faggot!

When is the BBEG gonna get here anyways?

>>40300518
>New ARC
Alright, gimme a bit. Feel free to suggest what sort of things you want to see happen in the next arc.

>>40300556
combo attacks
team attacks

>>40300500
Well damn.

>>40300556
The Toystore, and maybe a shady underground fighting circuit, with tough opponents, but the option to bet on your kid. Thereby providing a high risk high reward option for money.

>>40300501
Well, technically, only Pokemon still alive at the end of the fight get xp.

Oh, also, things that should be changed or gotten rid of too.

Things I KNOW don't work:
>SPEED as the sole to-hit stat is a no-go.
>>I already had HUMOR-to-HUMOR rolls for JIBES and WISECRACKS because it just didn't make sense that you would physically aim an insult.
>>I think I'm gonna do the D&D thing where STRENGTH is the to-hit stat for most melee, SPEED for ranged, and SPEED is the dodge stat for all to-hit attacks.
>PUMMEL is overpowered.
>>I might rename it THE OL' ONE-TWO and make it a "hit twice" attack.
>Animal onesies are a fun part of the concept... and are clearly inferior to other outfit possibilities.
>>Logic be damned, onesies will collide with no other slot. Tuck 'em into shoes, hold weapons in your hands, wear a jacket and pants if you fucking want
>>probably you can only benefit from one outfit-matching effect at a time
>I need to flesh out MAKE BELIEVE.
>>For instance, RESHAPE is an environmental TRANSFORM that buffs/debuffs impartially
>>CREATE is what Greg did with his motorcycle, and makes an imaginary object that grants buffs or techniques.

>>40300606
Hmm... Combo attacks meaning that, as long as it keeps hitting, you can keep going? I can definitely do team attacks, although I'll have to do some thinking to keep it interesting.

>>40300827
nah, i meant more like fighting game style combos, where doing certain things in a certain order would do a special attack, but if you were interrupted in some were way, you'd lose it

>>40300872
I like this idea.

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>>40300518
>>40300556
>_
>New ARC!
>ARC 2: The SEEDY UNDERSIDE of child combat!
After their hospital stay together, Greg and Tayana became fast friends, in the way of children who didn't ever really have good reasons to dislike each other. Besides, it doesn't count if it's in a battle, right?

You become good friends with the Smiths and Jenkinses, as well. Mrs. Smith is a fight parent too, which is interesting- you don't often get a couple who are both interested in training their kids. Sometimes you wish your spouse shared your enthusiasm for the sport.

Anyway, you have this money from the battles won, and you want to take your kid shopping to celebrate him getting out of the hospital. So you take him to the toy store, where all manner of combat equipment is available. You tell him he can buy one outfit and one toy, not telling him that if he has a couple of things he's interested in you'll probably get both to surprise him.

TOYS/WEAPONS:
>Laser gun
>Slingshot
>Yo-yo
>Any toy you want to see used as a weapon

Outfits:
>superhero outfit (pick a hero)
>animal onesie (pick an animal)
>professional outfit (pick a profession)
>any outfit you think could have interesting combat application

>>40301420
>Baseball Bat
Gotta stick with the classics.

>Running Shoes and the old Red/Blue 3D glasses
Shoes to build on speed, and glasses because imagination I guess.

>>40301420
>TOYS/WEAPONS:
>Slinky

Outfit:
>Sonic outfit

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Weapon:
one of these bad boys.
let him pick the hilt color

>>40301507
>Slinky

Care to explain?

>>40301586
It's like a really long ring. Sonic loves rings.

>>40301604
Goddamnit Anon.

What combat effectivness comes from a slinky?

>>40301420
>>Yo-yo
For Yo-yo battles. It's really good weapon. Spining bludgeon, rope for incapacitation, and can have wicked looking spikes.
Outfit: Spiked leather jacket(or west), all punk rock looking. Matching boots, bracers, and pants.

>>40301632
Not him, but you can tangle someone up with slinky pretty good.

>>40301632
Well, you can get steel slinkys, a nice durability improvement over the plastic ones.
You can hold one end and sling the other into their face, you can use it to snare their legs, you can use it to mesmerise them with it's hypnotic oscillations, you could use it as a makeshift knuckleduster...

>>40301499
>>40301507
>>40301515
>>40301679
He expresses interest in a few things, but settles on a steel Slinky- which uses SPEED to hit, since it's whiplike, and has neat ensnarement effects- and some kind of blue hedgehog? You didn't play games much as a kid- too busy fightan in real life. Anyway the hat grants +1 to SPEED, the onesie grants +1, and together it's +3; additionally, the spines deal damage to anyone attacking barefisted. You go back and get him a yo-yo too, which has similar benefits to the slinky with more advanced techniques and less damage, and a pair of classic 3D movie glasses. The glasses are fun, they grant a vision bonus to hit.

Usually I go plurality rule, but no-one overlapped really so I just went with what I felt like would have good mechanical properties.

When you go up to the counter to purchase, the cashier tells you there's a fighting event tonight. You're interested, and ask if you can invite your friends. She says, "Yeah, if they're cool," which sends up alarm bells in your head. But she seems nice, so you assume it's nothing. She gives you a plain-looking flier and sends you on your merry way with your purchases.

You tell Yesenia, Maisie, and the Smiths about the event tonight, and you decide to carpool in your van.

Greg's done his homework, and he's excited to get going to the event. But first, of course, you've got to suit up! You go with his new... is it "Sanic"?... onesie, his new 3D glasses his leather jacket, and his heelies.

Now he just needs a weapon.
>Electric guitar. [Ol' Faithful]
>Yo-yo. [Advanced techniques, but less damage.]
>Slinky. [No special techniques, but heavy and painful.]

>>40301686 see >>40301679

What about a Steel-Slinky wrapped Bat? That's sure to cause some damage. We could also pull the slinky off and tangle people, and then fucking wreck them with the bat. There's your combo move.

>>40301843
>Slinky. [No special techniques, but heavy and painful.]
Gotta give him practise with the yoyo before we take it for a spin in battle.
DOHOHOHO

>>40301853
Oops, too late I guess.

>>40301843
Electric Guitar, an incapacitating weapon is useless without something to hit them with while they're down.

>>40301843
>>Yo-yo.

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let's go yoyo.

>Yo-yo

Is op die?

>>40302763
OP is not die, I'm writing the post as we speak. Sorry for the long pause, my mom got home from visiting the ER

>>40302786
Good for yall, I hope she's feeling well.

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>>40302313
>>40302075
>>40301917
Greg goes with the yo-yo. The other kids arrive, looking pretty sharp in their matchy-matchy outfits, but what do they know! You love your boy's fashion decisions just how they are.

Of course, you had to take a group photo. They squeezed in tight and all, but Manuel still got cut in half by the frame. Dammit.

You pile into the van and plug the address on the flier into Yesenia's phone, and set off on your way.

Talk in the car starts out lighthearted and animated, but as you approach your destination the mood changes- apprehension looms over the car. Not just because it's a big fighting event. The venue you're going to is in a... really sketchy neighborhood. You're a little freaked out.

You spend several minutes within a hundred feet of the building before you finally realize the entrance is down some stairs into the basement in an alleyway. What the fuck, honestly?

You can hear fighting, so you guess you're in the right place. You go down the stairs and an eyeslot opens to reveal a paranoid adult gaze. You show the flier and the bolt slides open, followed by the chain coming off, followed by the door creaking just ajar.

You're not totally sure why you squeezed through. Maybe once you've made enough bad decisions in a row, you just can't stop?

It's crowded inside, and kind of dirty. Money is changing hands in a corner, and there's a rough ring tied off with two kids scrapping in it. The crowd roars epithets at them as they wrestle and spar.

Holy shit, it's a fucking child fighting ring.

>Check out bookkeeper.
>Check out ring.
>Get the fuck out of there.

>Check out ring.
>Ask Amelia what the hell she's supposed to be dressed as.

>>40302938
>>Check out bookkeeper.

Find out who they are betting on, and try to find out information about your opponents.

>>40302938
>Check bookkeeper

You're a really good QM btw. You really know how to spin stories.

>>40302938
>Check out bookkeeper.

>>40302938

>Manuel's outfit
>HE PUTS ON HIS ROBE AND WIZARD HAT!
>I can't stop laughing

>>40303148
he's got a warhammer too. i love it

>>40303176
>Manuel Casts Holy Shock
>An actual lightning bolt crashes through the ceiling and vaporizes a kid
>Various bystander shouts "HAMMER OF JUSTICE!"

>>40302996
Amelia is dressed as Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz movie. Specifically the movie, as her slippers are ruby.

>>40303039
>>40303093
>>40303104
You go to the bookkeeper.

Before you can say a word, and without looking up, the bookkeeper says, "Ten, right?"

You blink. "What?"

"Your kids, they're ten, right?"

Your eyebrows raise. "Yeah, they are. I mean, they're not all mi-"

"Outsiders fight the house. We got two ten-year-old twins, Alex and Sam, they can double fight or fight you individually, your call. Or if you're feeling braver, you can do two-on-one with a twelve-year-old, name of George, tall boy with the facial scar in the ring now?"

You turn to face the ring. George is beating the snot out of a kid, probably his same age? "I... see."

"And then we've got two fifteen-year-olds, Melissa and Roger, we're doing three-on-one with ten-year-olds with them. We figure the odds are roughly even, and the house collects a percentage of all winnings."

"So," he continues, "wanna bet? Wanna fight? What'll it be?"

>you can probably figure out the options from reading the above
>"fucking leave" remains an option of course

>>40303497
>I think we'll just watch a fight for now
>Watch Alex and Sam

>>40303497
> Three V one Melissa
We gotta win back that ice cream money.

Manuel + Greg (they have good apport) vs. Alex + Sam

>>40303583
This works aswell.

>>40303497
>betting so we don't anger them by just watching.

>>40303497
>> Three V one Melissa

One stunner. 2 damage dealers.

>>40303614
We definitely want Manuel, he's straight up fucking gangster.

>>40303497
>kid fighters at 15.

Final boss is a manchild putting money on it now, also 3 v Melissa.

yeah, no matter what we do we should have manuel in it, i wanna see his spellz

>>40303667
>>40303664
>>40303645
>>40303614
The kids are excited by the prospect of getting to fight a fifteen-year-old, and you and the other fight parents say some noncommittal things like "maybe" and "we'll see" that the bookkeeper takes for a definite yes.

"How about Melissa?" the bookkeeper asks.

"Yeah!" Greg says, and you elbow him. He looks up at you, confused.

"Alright, which one of you isn't fighting?"

>Manuel [I'm pretty sure everyone wants Manuel in]
>Greg
>Tayana
>Amelia

I say Tayana

>>40303723
>Tayana, let her scout the 10 year old fighters.

>>40303738
>>40303747
Okay, can do. By the way, if there's ever a fight where Greg isn't involved, you can choose one person to be the main controlled character (and, of course, you can submit commands for the other characters as well.)

>>40303790
Sounds good.

>>40303747
Seconding. We should be able to tank well enough to keep the other two in the game.

>>40303723
>>40303738
>>40303747
>>40303834
Tayana decides to sit this one out. You're still not totally on board with this. "Uh, excuse me..."

"You came here to fight, right?" says the bookkeeper.

You can't think of a polite way to get around the obvious fact you brought your kids dressed for a fight. "Well, yeah..."

"And here's a fight on a silver platter. Let's get these kids off to the changing rooms." He herds the kids off into the crowd and immediately is invisible.

Yesenia frowns. "Changing rooms? Why would they have to change? They came dressed to fight."

>[continued]

>>40303852
Oh no

>>40303886
oh HELL no

>>40303852
Nope

We should find out rules beforehand?

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>>40303945
>>40303900
>>40303886
: )

You're pretty sure you know why the kids are going to the changing room, and it makes your blood run cold. Letting your kids fight without optimized equipment is like letting them fight naked!

They come out to the ring, dressed in totally ordinary t-shirts and pants, to moderate cheering from the audience. Then Melissa comes in.

Like George was, Melissa is wearing what can only be called a gay porn harness. This made you uncomfortable when you thought it was just George's weird stat-boosting clothing, but if it's standard issue if you're fighting for the house...? Whose kids are these?

"Welcome to Battle Au Naturale!" shouts a loudspeaker. You push your way to the front of the audience. If your kid can't use the equipment you bought him, he can at least have your guidance in this fight.

Greg has the SPEED advantage, and acts first.
>HIT
>DEFEND
>MAKE BELIEVE
>JOKE

>>40304148
>JOKE
>"It's a nice combover but it's a shame it only hides one half of the ugly!"

i don't know if make believe will be useful against an opponent this age.
>DEFEND (tumble)

>>40304148
>Tumble

>>40304190
The joke is pretty good to though...

>>40304148
>>HIT
Go for kneecaps, gotta slow her down.

>>40304190
Yeah, I'm switching to this.

>>40304229
>>40304190
"It's a nice combover but it's a shame it only hides one half of the ugly!" Greg calls out. You let out a burst of laughter and pump your fist in the air.

"That's one half better than you!" calls out Melissa, totally unfazed by the insult. Greg is impressed by her timing, but similarly unfazed by the counter-insult.

Amelia TRANSFORMs into an elephant, waving her arm in front of her nose and trumpeting. For three rounds she takes -1 to SPEED and +3 to STRENGTH.

Manuel goes for a BLUDGEON against Melissa's STRENGTH. She takes one point of STRENGTH damage and .8 normal damage, leaving her at 4.2 HUMOR.
>HIT
>DEFEND
>MAKE BELIEVE
>JOKE

>>40304377
>Defend, Tumble

>>40304377
>>HIT
Attack kneecaps for speed loss, we need to stun her, if possible.

>>40304377
>MAKE BELIEVE
>THINK BEAR THOUGHTS

>>40304423
"TUMBLE!" you shout, and Greg does, ending up in a place not much better than he started, but successfully becoming hard to hit.

Melissa takes a swing at Greg and misses.

Manuel attempts a BLUDGEON against Melissa's SPEED, but misses.

Amelia, empowered by her pachyderm TRANSFORMation, attempts a KNOCKOUT. She succeeds with a critical hit; Melissa is out for two turns, and takes 1.2 damage, lowering her to 3.0 HUMOR.
>HIT
>DEFEND
>MAKE BELIEVE
>JOKE

>>40304524
Hit hit hit! Kick em while they're down!

or maybe laugh it off once and then hit.

>>40304524
>>HIT

we need manuel to transform into eagle form

>>40304524
>MAKE BELIEVE
Become a bear whilst we got the time to do so uninterrupted, then we'll have the strength for a speed and strength combo attack like we did at the start.

>>40304524
Laugh it off, then hit

yeah!
transform greg into bear form, and manuel into eagle form, and we can go in for the animal kingdom combo

>>40304552
>>40304556
The crowd gasps as three ten-year-olds stand around a teenager kicking her in the ribs.

Greg hits for .8 damage, leaving her at 2.2 HUMOR.

Manuel hits for 1.0 damage, leaving her at 1.2 HUMOR.

Amelia hits for exactly 1.2 damage, K.O.ing Melissa.

The crowd is silent. That was a fucking curbstomp.

An official walks onto the scene and declares the kids the winners, gives them a cut of the earnings, and then ushers them offstage. Melissa stays onstage, immobile, for an unnerving length of time before she is moved offstage by a stagehand.

You feel sick.
>Fight someone else.
>Leave once your kids get back.
>Snoop around.

P.S.: LAUGH IT OFF heals the user or a comrade, and none of the kids got a scratch on them.
P.P.S.: I laughably overestimated how hard this fight would be. Action economy is a bitch!

>>40304613
Henceforth known as Junglebook style.

>>40304702
>You feel sick.
why, you knew the outcome of a 3v1 fight.

did we not bet on our kids?!? We're a horrible dad.

>>40304702
>You feel sick.
Wait, we have EMPATHY?!

>Fight someone else.
Lets get those twins.

>>40304759
Agreed. Manuel and Greg vs. Twins.

>contemplate the ethics of child fighting

>>40304753
You didn't place a bet at all, but you are getting a cut of the winnings by virtue of being the parent of one of the winners.

>>40304759
>>40304769
I will do this right after going to McDonald's and getting something to eat. Should take an hour or less.

I've been at this for about twelve hours straight LMAO I'm having the time of my life tho

>>40304916
>I've been at this for about twelve hours straight LMAO I'm having the time of my life tho
I was gonna say, first post was 13 hours ago... How long you been awake for? When you thinking of sleeping?

>>40304916
this is the first quest i've actually been interested in

>>40304916
I like your drawings

>>40304934
Since 10 pm yesterday evening EST, so about 18, 19 hours I guess. My sleep schedule's been fucked for weeks, I'm hoping to reset it tonight.

>>40304989
>>40305009
Ahh, thanks! And thanks to everyone who's given me a compliment in this thread, I didn't want to seem conceited by responding, but now I think about it ignoring compliments is as bad?

i kinda wanna run a quest of my own, now, too. something post apocalyptic
how long did it take you to write your system?

>>40305028
>making nice drawings
>up for 12+ hrs already
>going to keep going to reset sleep schdule
>my god qm is full of win!

>>40305300
I mean, I'm still writing it, honestly. my dumb ass thought that a fifteen-point stat spread would stand up to three ten-point stat spreads, so I'm really not the person to be asking for advice on system design.

if you mean, how long did it take from the first germ of the idea to actually posting something? like an hour, maybe two. again, I'm not the best person to ask about these things, I am Not Doing It Right hahaha

>>40304759
>Greg + Manuel VS Twins

LETS FUCKING DO THIS!

>>40296245
style, grace and a funny face

>>40305604
he's got funny eyebrows, for sure.

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>>40305519
>>40304759
>>40305519
Greg comes out of the dressing room and presses money into your hands. "Dad, can Manuel and I fight the twins?"

God damn you, you're no good at saying no to that face.

In they go again. You gnaw on your lip. This'll be more even... and therefore more dangerous. You're worried.

Greg has the SPEED advantage and acts first.
>HIT
>DEFEND
>MAKE BELIEVE
>JOKE

>>40304824
You were a child fighter, once. Kept it up right until you turned sixteen and the ring was closed to you. You loved it. It made you feel alive, it made you pocket money, and you always felt like you were pushing yourself to be your best possible self.

And this... this doesn't feel right. Something isn't right here. The harnesses, the tired, blank expressions of the house fighters... whose kids are they...? They don't seem like they treat their fighters very well.

But in a deeper sense, you think to yourself, this is what we do, isn't it. We compel our children to hurt each other for our pride, our gain. You're just nicer about it.

>>40306358
>DEFEND
>TUMBLE
Let's kick off by trying to draw an attack that'll miss.

>>40306358
>HIT
Focus all attacks on one of the twins.

>>40306358
>You were a child fighter, once.
This is why I like you, the drawings are great but the stories you make are delightfully immersive

>>40306358
>make believe

Make believe that the twins are different from each other try to negate any same alike bonuses they may gain!

>>40306575
>>40306482
>>40306413
You decide to TUMBLE towards the rear of the twin with the lower HUMOR. (That is, Alex.) You land on your ass. TUMBLing is kinda hit-or-miss, huh.

Sam attempts THE OL' ONE-TWO on Manuel. Both punches miss.

Alex attempts THE OL' ONE-TWO on Manuel. One punch lands, dealing .6 damage, leaving Manuel at 2.4 HUMOR.

Manuel says in a voice like thunder, "May the tower of Babel fall to rubble!" Sam furrows his eyebrows. "What?" Alex does the same. "Mrfgbxl?"

>HIT
>DEFEND
>MAKE BELIEVE
>JOKE

>>40306759
>JOKE
>"Cat got your tongue?"

>>40306790
This, but with more sneering

>>40306790
This. More sneering tho.

>>40306815
>>40306790
"Whassamatter, Sam? Cat got your tongue?" Greg calls out. Sam, who can no longer understand any human language, is nonplussed, but Alex takes it pretty badly- taking .2 damage and 3 IMAGINATION damage. Alex is at 1.8 HUMOR.

Sam STRIKES at Manuel, but misses.

Alex STRIKES at Manuel, and hits. Manuel takes .6 damage, leaving him at 1.8 HUMOR.

Manuel AGGRESSES Alex with a laser beam, but misses, scorching the wall behind.

>>40306938
If this is a vote...
>JOKE
>"Looks like your other half has gone loopy! Who'll hold you at night /now/?!"

>>40307060
Dude you are on fucking point with these.

>MOAR SNEERING

>>40306938
choke one of them out with the yo-yo string

>>40307082
It's funny because it's implied their parents don't care about them so this is going to sting like motherfucker.

>>40307109
er, did they get rid of weapons too? in that case disregard

>>40307116
Even better!

>>40307060
Shit, sorry, that was supposed to be a vote, yeah. When this fight's over, I'm wrapping up the thread and calling it a night

Greg accuses Alex of incest, and Alex takes .4 damage, leaving Alex's HUMOR at 1.4.

Sam STRIKES at Manuel and misses. Alex abandons the quest to attack Manuel and STRIKES at Greg with vengeful alacrity- to no avail, as the punch misses.

Manuel AGGRESSES Alex with a firework, and it hits Alex squarely in the back, dealing .8 damage and leaving Alex's HUMOR at .6.
>HIT
>DEFEND
>MAKE BELIEVE
>JOKE

>>40307188
>JOKE
>"With bitchslaps like that I'm thinking you're the chick in this outfit!"
>Pray that Alex is a guy

>>40307274
Seconded

>>40307274
genuinely mistaking her gender while simotaniously insulting her lack of strength. Sounds like a double whammy to me.

>>40307437
Greg's weaponized misogyny paralyzes Alex, in addition to dealing .4 damage, leaving Alex with .2 HUMOR.

Sam attempts to LAUGH IT OFF with Alex and fails.

Manuel STRIKES Alex and smears blood all over the floor. Alex is K.O.ed.
>HIT
>DEFEND
>MAKE BELIEVE
>JOKE

>>40307616
>MAKE BELIEVE
>Smear some blood on our cheeks
>Become THE BEAR

>>40307643
This. Push the advantage.

>>40307643
Greg smears the blood on his face and TRANSFORMs into a bear with a deep and terrifying growl. Your eyes widen in shock. You didn't teach him that... did you?

Greg receives a +2 bonus to STRENGTH for the next 4 turns, or until the effect is broken.

Sam finds words, and shrieks, "THAT BLOOD IS POISOOOOON!" You feel a brief wave of terror wash over you, but fortunately for you the MAKE BELIEVE doesn't take root.

Manuel AGGRESSES Sam with a gout of lava but misses.

>>40307739
>HIT
>DEFEND
>MAKE BELIEVE
>JOKE

>>40307763
>HIT
>BLUDGEON
Let's just go with maximum brutality even if the ol' one two is probably a better bet

>>40307739
>HIT
Give bear hug.

>>40307739
>>HIT

>>40307812
Oh shit, this is good.

Switching to it from >>40307799

>>40307799
This

>>40307817
>>40307812
>>40307799
>>40307763
Greg makes a BLUDGEON attempt on Sam's STRENGTH. Specifically, he attempts to squeeze the life out of Sam's body. Unfortunately, he hugs empty air. Sam shouts, "I feel so loved when people miss me!" It's a weak WISECRACK, and fails.

Manuel STRIKES at Sam and hits, dealing 1.0 damage. Sam's HUMOR is now at 2.0.

>>40307901
This is a vote, by the way; you know the drill by now.

>>40307901
>HIT
>FURIOUS SWIPES with our imaginary claws

>>40307901

GIVE EM THE OL' 1-2

>>40307901
>HIT
One order of bear claws!
Swipe at him with your claws.

>>40307901
Bludgeon again!

>>40307948
fury swipes!

>>40307948
>>40307953
>>40307956
Greg gives 'em THE OL' ONE-TWO. One claw, two claw, red claw, bloody claw. Unfortunately both miss widely.

Sam CRACKS WISE on your STRENGTH. "Jeez, kid, would it help if I wore a red rose or something? I don't know who you're attacking, but it ain't me!" It's a critical hit, and Greg is paralyzed.

Manuel BLUDGEONS at Sam's STRENGTH, but misses.

Sam kicks Greg in the head, dealing .4 damage. Greg's HUMOR stands at 2.6.

Manuel BLUDGEONS at Sam's STRENGTH again, but this time it lands. Sam takes .4 damage and 1 STRENGTH damage; Sam's HUMOR stands at 1.6.

Greg's bear TRANSFORM has worn off at the worst possible time, leaving him paralyzed still for this and the next round.

Sam AGGRESSES Manuel, but misses widely. Manuel BLUDGEONS at Sam's STRENGTH, but misses.

Sam AGGRESSES at Manuel, dealing .8 damage. Manuel stands at 1.0 HUMOR.
>HIT
>DEFEND
>MAKE BELIEVE
>JOKE

>>40308231
>JOKE
>LAUGH IT OFF
>"Wait, I only just realised your babel attack has worn off. This kid speaks so much shit I thought he was still spilling gobbledegook!"

>>40308231
>PRANK: run up behind Sam and preform a WEDGIE

>>40308311
classic

>>40308307
This

>>40308307
Manuel chuckles at your crack, and regains .4 HUMOR to stand at 1.4.

SAM AGGRESSES at Manuel with a burst of steam. It hits squarely in his face, for 1.0 damage. Manuel is at .4 HUMOR.

Manuel LAUGHS IT OFF to heal .8 damage, leaving him at 1.2 HUMOR.

>>40308382
Defend, tumble

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>>40308323

>>40308382
Okay, healing is wearing thin and we'll have to keep up the good jokes if we want it to last.

Need to end this fast, let's try that
>WEDGIE

>>40308430
>>40308433
Since we still have two people up we could table top Sam. We crouch and signal Manuel to push.

>>40308382
rip off the whole ass with a wedgie

>>40308519
Let's go for this

>>40308527
>>40308433
>>40308430
>>40308311
Greg yanks up Sam's grey underwear with a vengeance. Sam shrieks, taking .4 damage and losing the turn. Manuel kicks Sam in the crotch for 1.2 damage. Greg grabs the back of Sam's head and slams it into Manuel's knee, K.O.ing Sam.

The crowd roars.

-----

You take everyone home in uneasy silence. There's blood on Greg's hands and on his face still, and the fresh joy of it has dried and hardened like premature wrinkles.

You drum your fingers on the wheel, and as it begins to rain your fingers are drowned out by the roof.

You suddenly realize that you'll have to go back there at some point- you have to know the story behind the house fighters, you have to help them- and you pull the van over to rest your forehead on the wheel.

Greg places his hand on your shoulder. "You alright, Dad?" Blood flakes off onto your shirt.

"Yeah, I'm alright, kiddo."

END ARC
END THREAD
END AGONIZINGLY LONG DAY

>>40308756
GG, now get some sleep OP, you've earned it.

>>40308756
Before you leave us to the slumber you so deserve can we have a twitter? I'd hate to miss next thread.

>>40308826
@extremeparentin. Thank God I set it up earlier, if I had to do it in my current state I really think I would start crying

>>40308857
Following, see you soon I hope.

>>40308857
Hahah, I can imagine.

Thanks for running

>>40296118

>1 STR

Greg is an absolute manlet and no amount of skull shirt can fix that.

This quest is cool and you are cool, OP