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>BBEG is powerful person and stays holed up in his fort/castle
>DM wants us to amass an army against BBEG's forces
>Party is discussing what to do against him, lots of small scale sabotage missions being talked about
>Party wizard at some point decides fuckthatnoise.jpg
>Wizard asks us to strike heroic poses, with the excuse that it's to refine our intimidation in battle
>Whips medusa head out of his bag of holding
>Petrifies entire party save himself
>GM's face when
>Loads petrified party into a wagon, carts us all down to BBEG's fortress
>OOC the players are pissed about being betrayed
>Wizard tells BBEG's guards that he's looking to sell some statues, wants to give his pitch to the big man himself
>Wizman passes his social checks and the BBEG is informed of a dude peddling some dankass statues
>BBEG has extravagant tastes and of course is down to check that shit out
>BBEG compliments the workmanship and is interested, haggles with the wizard over the price
>Wizard shakes his head, says "No, that's too low." and casts stone to flesh on us.
>We murder the shit out of BBEG and his accompanying guards
>Disguise ourselves as guards and 'escort' the wizard out of the fortress
>GM slightly irate about having to throw out most of his campaign notes but is a good sport
>>
>>40392795

And this is why Campaign Bosses should always have a Seneschal who deals with this sort of shit.
>>
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>>40392795
Wizards, not even once.
>>
>>40392795
So the BBEG just stood there while the Wizard cast one Flesh to Stone spell/party member to bring them back to life? I think he deserved to lose for his stupidity.
>>
>>40392997
>how do turns work
>>
>>40392997
>Not playing an edition with segments
>>
>Party of meets up with new guys character in the woods.
>he's an envoker with a pet goat
>claims goat is his master and communicates telepathically with goat
>won't do ANYTHING without goats approval
>shaman making jokes about how he probably fucks the goat
>makes WAY too many jokes to be comfortable
>wizard says if shaman keeps disrespecting goat he will leave
>more goat sex jokes
>mfw can we please just move along
>GM retcons event
>that night shaman RPs trying to have sex with the goat while wizard is asleep.
>wizard meta games and says goat wakes him telepathically
>fight happens
>shaman destroys wizard
>GM tells wizard to reroll
>not a word said of intended goat fucking
>mfw wizard makes a ranger with a pig companion....
>sessions ends for the night
>THIS HAS TAKEN FOUR HOURS
>no combat and only rolled dice once
>I still play with them because it's the only group on meetup around me
>hate my life
>>
>>40393219
Such a bad day....
>>
>>40393219
It's always sort of annoying when the group spends way too long on "lol so funny shenanigans" stuff. Like I enjoy light hearted games and joking around, but I've had it too many times where, like you described, it takes 4 hours.
>>
>begin of the session, party isn't even formed
>be on a small boat, traversing a calm river
>GM lets me roll on sharpe senses
>barely pass
>character sees something shiney on a small little island that is somehow amid the river
>I'm so gonna getting this
>roll for swimming
>roll really fucking bad
>DM didn't want to kill me right there, says the boatmen are having a great time watching me struggle
>they need to stop the boat because I need so long
>finally get to the little island
>can still hear the laughter
>only a small minor steep between me and the shiny
>roll for climbing
>first roll is a 20
>second roll is a 20 again
>we hold our breath
>20
>masterfully take this hill
>you should have fucking seen it
>the boatsmen are so gobsmacked
>they can't believe it
>like fuck

DSA, where you have to roll for every shitty little action.
>>
>>40393330
Totally ruins the immersion. I can be cool with fade to black sex scenes I guess. But goat fucking? From a dwarf I believe? Please GM step in and end my hell
>>
>>40393471
So did you get to the shiny object?
>>
>>40393471
What was the shiny object? The rogue in me needs to know.
>>
>>40393524
>>40393586
I didn't need to roll for it. It was just a metallic frame. After we saved the children, one gave me a gem that fitted exactly.
>>
>Playing kobold paladin
>Yeah
>Fighting goblin bandits who've been terrorizing a small hamlet
>Get ganged on by five of them, getting beat down
DM: Two of them start to pin you down
Me: Okay, I roll to throw them off
>Fail miserably
DM: You're being pinned by four goblins now, the fifth is undoing his trousers
>I'm all WTF, roll to try and escape, fail again
DM: Okay, you're being brutally butt-raped by a horny goblin, roll to see how ass-ravaged you are
>Roll a 20
>DM looks me in the eye
DM: Your holy little lizard anus will never be the same.
>My fucking face
>>
>>40393697
Those are fighting words right there. Did he by chance apply damage for the anal rape
>>
>>40392851
Even with the senechal it would be one of the better ins.

A senechal of a rich Lord/king would want to conduct business inside the keep because he's too good to do anything out in the commons. So even if the wizman insisted on doing business directly, the players could still spring and kill the guards and intimidate the senechal to take them to the king, disguised as guards of course.

Now if the dm really wanted to be a dick he could declare there is a 12 hour debilitating sickness after stone to flesh. So when wizman let's them go, the king witnesses a gruesome display of guys rolling around in agony, puking and shitting themselves allover the floor.
>>
>>40393697
Yeah, the wizard in my party got anally tentacle raped in the first session. The player was a good sport about it and found it hilarious but his character will cry about his ravaged butt hole whenever he gets the chance.
>>
>>40393697
I would roll to find new DM
>>
>>40393219
I'm curious who you think is at fault since you were there. From the reading it's the Shaman's fault.
>>
>>40393834
He specifically told me that it was an alternative to just killing my character, and yes he did apply damage.

Both mental and physical.
>>
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>Just recently started a group of 5e
>Everyone just gotten to level 3, chilling and acting cool
>Next session the grill that the DM dotes on shows up with level 6
>mfw she and the DMT just decided to randomly do a 1 on 1 side mission
>Apparently she soloed a dragon
>mfw were still playing and she still brags about being higher level than us 7 sessions later
>>
>>40394006
>>Next session the grill that the DM dotes on shows up

Do I even need to read beyond this point?

No, no I didn't.
>>
>Playing All Flesh Must Be Eaten
>Party consists of my drug dealer character James, a musclebound McPunchAlot named Zane, who is also That Guy, and an average dude named Andrew.
>Military are making civvies take shelter in police station
>We're sitting in a room getting blood samples taken
>Soldiers standing guard in the room we're in leave suddenly, everybody has to make perception checks
>Everyone hears gunshots outside, but my character can hear lots of moaning due to succeeding especially well at my check
>I deduce that the building is getting surrounded and everybody decides to GTFO
>Explore the police station looking for an exit, find the armory and grab some shit
>Zombies start breaking in through the windows, one comes at us and That Guy severs it's head and arms
>It's still writhing around but can't do much
>GM emphasizes that more and more are pouring in through the windows
>Me and Andrew GTFO the police station through the front door
>Zane decides he wants to use the live dismembered zombie as a weapon
>Everyone lolwuts at this
>After argument about penalties and shit Zane decides to just try to tear the zombie's leg off and use that
>Another argument over penalties
>Zane tends to argue if ANYTHING negative happens to his character, or if he has to do something at a penalty
>Ultimately decides to lock himself inside the armory, trapping himself
>Instead of running the other way down the completely unobstructed hallway, to the exit me and Andrew just took
>Justifies it with the 'But that's what my character would do' excuse
>Zane somehow survives the encounter and meets up with our characters a couple hours later, who GTFO'd in a police car but came back later after raiding an apartment complex
>Zane also later got shot and bitched about being hit despite recieving 0 damage due to his armor
>Argued for what felt like a full 15 minute
>Over 0 damage
>We kicked him out after 3 sessions of his bullshit.
>>
>>40393697
>roll to see how ass-ravaged you are
This is the point where you gather your shit, and walk out.

>>40393856
>debilitating sickness after stone to flesh
at the least some confusion. A second ago you were in the forest, now you're inside a room, and who the fuck is this guy. What the hell happened? Wait, what? Who is this guy?
>>
>>40393920
I blame both the shaman for being a faggot and the GM for allowing it to happen
>>
>>40394006
My god the horror you have experienced... any more stories? I feel the need to punish myself today
>>
>>40394140
But you should...
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>>40394541
I'll try and think of some
I forgot to mention that she has a sword that has another sword inside it and her char name is 'Adora' (DMs idea)
>>
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>>40392795
>thathappened.jpg.png.gif.exe.bat
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>>40394788
>Has a sword with another sword in it
Like the church sword from Bloodborne? Cuz that would make sense and be kind of cool.
>>
>Playing Dead Reign, a Palladium Books zombie game
>GM doesn't want any martial type characters, or special in game O.C.C.s
>have to play a regular dude, but I want my character to become O.C.C. that uses dogs to help hunt zombies
>character background:auto mechanic, and muscle car aficionado
>most other PC aren't seasoned RPers
>wanting to gear my character GM won't allow me to have an AR-15
>live in South, own an AR personally, GM owns an AR, at least ten people I know own ARs, or other long guns
>GM allows me a fucking 5 shot 25 semi-auto pistol
>are you fucking kidding me?
>shit gets deeper
>other PC playing "regular guy" who does medieval reenactment, so has full fucking plate mail
>full fucking plate mail
>I used to do SCA
>laugh at the ridiculousness of a guy who plans to walk around all the fucking time wearing full fucking plate
>whatever
>railroaded into a three story house with a shitty fence
>check garage
>big fucking truck that could transport all of us
>doesn't work
>use mechanics skill
>determine the carburetor needs some work
>not a hard fix IRL
>Me: "I'm going to try to fix it"
>no roll
>GM "you can't get it to work"
>I'm a mechanic, I want to work on it and get it running
>rolls
>GM: "you can't get it to work"
>whiskey tango foxtrot?
>everyone trying to do their own thing
>trying to pull the group together
>campaign going no where
>ain't no body got time for that
>>
Reading some of these stories, I find myself fortunate that I've never really had a bad session.
>>
> Pathfinder
> party has been staying at a frontier military fort, doing random quests and stuff while the military builds a road
> pretty much have free reign in the fort because we've been so helpful
> civilian merchants give us discounts, etc
> go out on a mission for a week
> come back, civilians are all gone
> military is half gone
> fort is crawling with Chelaxian troops
> Captain of the former guard is now basically the Chelaxians' bitch
> They're sending him and the rest of his men to go investigate some shit down the road tomorrow
> It's a ruse, so they can take over the fort
> Party decides to go with the departing military, since we're all bros
> Spend half a day going down the road, everybody decides to stop for lunch
> Party spends nearly an hour OOC discussing what to do next
> Go see the elves? Ask for help from the old druid? Fight the dragon people?
> Finally get tired of listening to this shit
> "I'mma go back, talk to the commander of the Chelaxian army, ask him to leave"
> Party spends another half hour OOC debating whether this is a good idea or not
> No, you don't understand, I'm fucking going. With or without you.
> Party decides to come with me

cont.
>>
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>>40396756

> Along the way, run into a roadblock
> totallynotsuspicious.jpg
> Chelaxian dudes hired some orc thugs to block off the road and keep anyone from coming near
> We make quick work of the bandits (quick for us anyway, there was lots of OOC rules lawyering)
> An plan, already in the works in my head, suddenly solidifies.
> Begin animating all the corpses into juju zombies
> command them to walk toward the fort, giving us an hour headstart
> Get to the fort, cast message on the party, tell them to hide and wait for the signal
> go up to the fort, get stopped by a guard
> act frantic, demand to see the commander, there's important news I must tell him
> Bluff check is made, but the guard isn't having it. Commander is not to be disturbed.
> Plan B engaged
> Start yelling about zombies, making a huge ruckus
> Soldiers stop what they're doing to see what the fuss is about
> When they're in range, cast mass suggestion
> Those soldiers over there are traitors!
> They all fail the save
> Every. Fucking. One.
> Suddenly a brawl erupts in the fort, soldiers all fighting each other
> Commander comes out, sees the brawl, starts barking orders
> Dominate Person
> Commander fails his save
> These soldiers have been infected with a zombie virus! You must order the rest of your men to kill them!
> He does
> More soldiers enter the melee
> Eventually the original soldiers are dead, but now there's only half a dozen or so soldiers left
> Tell the commander he needs to kill the rest of the soldiers in case they got affected too
> He seems dubious, refuses to kill the rest of his men
> Suddenly, the animated juju orc bandits enter the fort
> Chelaxian commander takes one look at the orcs, pulls out his sword and runs it through the nearest soldier
> Kills them all
> Last soldier tries to defend himself
> lands a critical hit on the Commander
> consult the critical hit deck
> bleed damage
> Commander kills the last soldier
> dies 2 rounds later from the bleed damage
> mfw
>>
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>>40396756
>>40396784
>>
>>40396383
SOunds like you aren't fun to play with.
>things aren't realistic, I can't do what I want
>>
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>Party gets to new town
>Intimidates the innkeeper into giving them rooms for cheap
>One starts fucking the innkeeper's mother while the other makes the innkeeper hold the bowl of soup in his lap while the character eats it, watching the first one fuck his mother
>I inject old lady noises into the conversation periodically.
>A magical talking cat with a mexican accent approaches them as they're going to the bank to get the deed, he has a job for them.
>They listen to the cat and then take him back to the inn they claimed ownership of and lock him in the safe while they do the job.
>They've also made periodic jokes about the ranger having sex with wolves due to her back story.
>Next Session they'll be pulling a shadowrun style mission in dungeons and dragons.
>They will most likely cause an excess of pain and suffering before, during, and after the mission
>mfw I am fine with this.
>>
>>40399424
So edgy my eyes bled.

So magical realm my screen turned to piss.
>>
>>40392795
I would've told that wizard to take a hike after pulling something like that.
>>
>>40399621
That's not really magical realm so much as it is just generic ERP

Magical realm has to be fetishy
>>
>>40399126
GM is dangling carrot and then whapping with rod
>>
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>>40399904
Fucking wolves, fucking old ladies, forcing the son to watch. That's like 5 different fetishes right there. "Generic"? Fuck's sake, Anon.

Unless it's samefag baiting the hook.
>>
>>40399621
"Evil" is not "edgy," son. Know the difference.
It clearly isn't magical realm as no one had a problem with it.

You kids and your buzzwords.
>>
Bump because I want more pain today
>>
>>40400057
The truck is a carrot, though it could also just be scenery (or a plot hook for later). You not getting stuff you specifically go and ask for is not.

In that post you complain about:
>I can't have an assault rifle at chargen
>A guy wants to wear armor a lot even though it isn't realistic
>DM doesn't want to redo his story because his BS reason the truck didn't work is easier to fix than he (I assume a non-mechanic) realized

Literally, you're going on about realism when it benefits you and your character or inconveniences another PC, and getting upset when the DM goes with something that's based more around what makes for a good game.
>>
>>40393219
>I still play with them because it's the only group on meetup around me

Been there. I had to leave the only frequently playing group near me due to a whole host of issues.

Including but not limited to ...
>GM sitting on a swivel chair with his computer on behind him, every time he thinks we're going to be discussing something amongst ourselves he would spin around to game or to check facebook.
>30+ something "veteran" constantly min-maxing and power gaming leaving it no fun for anyone else.
>GM following terribly written campaign books to the letter. "If it doesn't say to give you a hint then I'm not going to. I don't care that it's been 4 hours and there hasn't been a single bit of combat."
>Players all older than 25 still obsessed with rape, gay and sex based jokes.
>>
>>40396383
>wanting to gear my character GM won't allow me to have an AR-15
Without telling me where your game is based I can't pass judgment, I mean what if it's set in the Uk?

>other PC playing "regular guy" who does medieval reenactment, so has full fucking plate mail
Guy has to pass endurance rolls constantly, would be super hot, he would be slow and inflexible, couldn't carry anything else. I think that having even replica plate mail on during a zombie apocalypse would be a massive disadvantage where as having a modern assault rifle would make some situations far less tense.
>>
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>>40396784
That sir is the definition of glory. I applaud you and your party for shenanigans of pure amazing.
>>
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>>40399126
Everything I was trying to do in the five session I played I was told "you can't", or "it doesn't work". He was trying to railroad us in one direction, and the other players were so new to playing RPGs that we couldn't get anything going. Everything I tried to pull the group together, or even do on my own failed.

>>40402867
It was set in Texas where we live. I only own three guns, but I know people with ten, or more. With all the Fudds around I asked for at least a 1911, or a 9mm, but he wouldn't budge.
>>
>>40403530
>9mm pistol in a state where almost everyone has a concealed carry permit.
Pretty reasonable. Should have been starting equipment regardless.
>>
>>40394232
>>40394232
>>We kicked him out after 3 sessions of his bullshit.

Did you really need 3 fucking sessions to kick the fucking whiny bitch?
Goddamnit anon, next time throw them out at the 2nd pointless argument.
>>
>>40393697

just leave the group, it's some fucked up magic realm or he's a bastard, either way it's bad.
>>
>>40399424

I really wish I could have fun with a game that can be so retarded that sounds like Jack Chick propaganda.
Alas, I have standards, therefore I can't.
>>
>>40403530
A 9mm is more reasonable that a hooker gun. Not green lighting a AR-15 I can sort of understand.
>>
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Whoever wanted pain here I go:
>Playing fallout rpg via roll20
>party of seven
>Player whose old character attempted to kill the party rolled a new character, Bill trayer.
>There's this PC, called fuse, who's kind of a nerd and a loser, obsessed with befriending a female PC (actually has a crush on her)
>Said PC is a borderline psycho, vault got killed by tribals, so she wants to genocide them, she's usually rude and rejects fuse friendship constantly
>My pc is a doctor who lost his license due to bad luck (his luck stat is high ironically), wanted my characters to mind his own business, but ends up risking his life a couple time for the others.

And now as for the story
>Bought PC parts that day and was installing them, showed up at the start of session then left, Party is gonna check for some missing NPC, mafia involved
>alice doesn't join, apparently has a solo mission, bill trayer fucks off somewhere

I think this was at at 4:30 pm, I came back like three hours later
>Find fuse player complaining and bitching about something
>I'm confused as shit, a fight had started not long ago, GM allowed me to join
>turns out fuse lost half of his HP due to friendly fire from our most recent party member, aeron the explosives dude.
>combat goes on, fuse and my pc are fighting a super mutant, rest of party busy with mafias.
>Aeron throws a grenade at the super mutant, crit fails, grenade lands on my hands
>"I ROLL AGI TO THROW IT!"
>lands on traitor NPC who's leading mafias
>he throws it back to aeron
>aeron already thinking about throwing the grenade back to us, thankfully it exploedes
>find the situation amusing, fuse player losing his shit.
>I healed him twice, now I am the one pissed at the moron who keeps having "accidents"
>We kill the super mutant, bill trayer shows up
>Walks up to fuse
>Stabs him in the back
>His player is laughing maniacally
cont
>>
>>40405558
Continue please.
>>
>>40405558
>My pc shots Bill without warning
>Says he only wants to kill fuse and another PC, since it's his job as a mafia (it's a lie, he just hates fuse and his player)
>Fuse player freaks out more, Bill player claims he succeded all his stealth rolls.
>Fuse uses his walkie talkie to call alice
>Alice player wants her to show up and help
>she never arrived
>Bill chats with my pc, says I'm a cool guy and I can live if I leave fuse behind.
>Agree to do that, fuse player begs me to help him OOC over steam, tell him to calm down.
>Since I have a rifle with high range, I plan to hide behind a corner and kill bill, gm says that's alright
>fuse got healed, now fighting alongside our female NCR soldier.
>Both bill and fuse kept failing and crit failing
>I should be laughing but I'm actually tired, between bill player being a dick and fuse being RIGHTFULLY angry at the two players attempting to kill him it has been HOURS
>it's near midnight now, bill player finally gives up
>"Alright fuse you win, I give up"
>bill takes out his revolver and kills himself
>Still can't laugh, we are all pissed at how long that took.
>GM realises how disastrous, complicated and derailed the campaing got.
>He deleted the campaing
I was pretty pissed at the time, and still Am.

Looking back, I do find amusing how at the climax of BOTH battles where bill player attempted to kill party members, everyone suddenly started to have shit rolls, the time prior to this one was hilarious, session being cut due to GM having to attend to his class, so we resumed a couple hours later, still failling our rolls, that day we played till 3am, and we all celebrated when the traitor PC was finally dead
>>
>>40403530
>It was set in Texas where we live.
I highly doubt a zombie plague would gain much traction in Taxes what with ...
>I only own three guns, but I know people with ten, or more.
>>
>>40405846
Clearly the zombie infection isn't transmitted via bite, or air, or bodily fluids, but rather via firearm. Once you touch a gun that's been handled by somebody who became a zombie, you're infected.
>>
>>40405558
>My pc is a doctor who lost his license ...
>Playing fallout ...
>Requires licence to practice medicine

>>40405725
Bad GMing. Simple as that.

Player X: 'I want to kill Player Y'.

GM: 'You can't this is a game where you must all work together using your character's unique skills to beat the challenge presented.'

Player X: 'Hurr durr but it's an RPG I can do whatever I want to!'

GM: 'No it's still a game and there are still rules, hence the huge rulebook.'
>>
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>>40403768
>AR 15 good choice, but
>223 widely available, but heavy and in high demand
>Requires routine maintenance, must partially disassemble in a clean environment to bore brush properly
>Accurate, but known to foul easily

I'd have let you have it. I've seen people pull far worse in AFMBE. Pic related.
>>
>>40406029
He was from a vault, and lost his license, meaning he could't practice medicine INSIDE the vault. He was free to perform medicine unquestioned otuside of it.

Now as for the player killing, the wasteland is a harsh place, and as most post apoc settings you can expect backstabbing and betrayers. The GM got kind of sick of the betraying after the second time, he's GMing D&D now, made rule about no player killing and said we all agreed to work together before campaing started.
>>
>>40400298
Nah, that's edgelord power fantasy bullshit. A PC fucked an innkeeper's mother.
>>
>>40406109
>He was from a vault, and lost his license, meaning he could't practice medicine INSIDE the vault. He was free to perform medicine unquestioned otuside of it.
Oh well excuse me for not noticing the things you didn't write.

>... most post apoc settings you can expect backstabbing and betrayers.
True if say they're NPC's, because almost all PnP RPG's are designed with the intention that the party is going to work together.

PC 1 kills PC 2.
PC's 3 and 4 get angry.
PC 5 sides with PC 2.
All PC's engage in combat with one another, meanwhile the evil warlock they were on their way to stopping ends the world.
Game ends in a confusing PvP mess.
Players laugh think it was all fantastic and commence throwing their shit at the walls.
GM dies a little inside looking at his pile of game unused notes.

>...made rule about no player killing and said we all agreed to work together before campaing started.
Sounds like a good plan.
>>
>>40393856
Flesh falls, everybody dies.
>>
>>40401862
I'm alright with denying the AR and the truck, but then allowing a guy wearing plate mail in a contemporary zombie game is literally retarded.
>>
>>40393697
What? 20 should always be good.

>as the goblins cock bears your ass, your anus squeezes shut so fast, and with such force, that a clap of divine thunder rings out
>the goblins are surprised, roll to escape during the confusion, adding your paladin levels to the roll
>if you escape, you've got their leader with his trousers down
>>
>>40406076
>Belt of .223
>akimbo skorpions
still would
>>
>>40402867
>he would be slow and inflexible, couldn't carry anything else
Sounds like someone doesn't know jack shit about how armor works.
>>
>>40394232
>grabbing a zombie
>feeling zombie blood dribble over you
>feeling the dead flesh squish in your hands
>the feeling of zombie blood and skin fragments landing on your face

I would have slapped that guy with so many Fear Tests
>>
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>>40394788
Does she also lift her sword in the air and yells "For the honor of Grayskull!" at the start of a battle?.
>>
>writing out a campaign
Serves your GM right. Hopefully he learned a valuable lesson about wasting time.
>>
>>40404371
>hooker gun
Heh!

I own a Smith & Wesson M&P 45. Everyone I know who has a pistol either owns a 45 ACP, 40 S&W, or 9MM. I don't even think about anything smaller than 380 for self defense. 22lr is great for plinking, but I don't know anyone who owns a 25 ACP
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Quick story from a few months ago (back before summer hit and everyone wandered off)

Our party is fairly high level, and the Wizard has started really getting his teeth into some nasty magic. He spends most of his downtime between missions researching spells since he doesn't play well with other Wizards.

His latest round of research was into his first 8th level spell and it was a partial failure. No one but the DM (who obviously colluded on this) was informed.

>We're in a fairly intense battle with the most recent branch of the Evil Doom Cultâ„¢

>Briefly knock out the evil captain guy we're fighting, his healers are moving in to get him back in the fight though

>Wizard shouts "I cast Stabilize on him"

>Wat?

>Stop that, he's the bad guy.

>Also you are not a Cleric/Druid, this is silly

>Wizard insists, DM accepts, rolls are made, faces are palmed

>There's a flash of light, an overpowering smell of hay and manure, and a faint neighing sound

>Unconscious bad guy turns into a miniature stable, his healers stop their efforts and try to figure out just what the hell happened

>Wizard dances triumphantly and shouts "GET IT?" then lights the small flammable building on fire

>Little horses run out...

He wound up using that half-assed Polymorph Any Object spell five times over the course of the mission. He nearly passed out laughing each time.
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>>40410984
Obligatory no sense of right and wrong.
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>>40410984
Fucking pun-ymorph.
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>>40393856
babbehs nuuuuuuu
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>High School 3.5 D&D Group
>Party travelling about
>Find a new town that is full of indoctrinated slaves to some wizard
>Make churches for him, serve him dutifully, praise him in every sentence, etc.
>We start rummaging around while our Rogue and Ranger head to the tavern
>We find that he is planning to summon a demon from beneath the largest church in the city
>Suddenly, homemade lasagna is ready
>Quick break while we eat and chat
>Come back and totally forget about the note we picked up detailing the event
>Continue to fuck about the town before suddenly this huge demon bursts from the town square
>We promptly leave

Lasagna is dangerous, yo.
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>>40393856
Hey, if you passed the fort save you should hardly get punished further for the transformation
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>>40392997
>>40393059
>>40393084
>The spell can only be used on one person per casting
>The wizard would have had to have prepared 4 castings/4 scrolls what ever.
>The BBEG had 4 or so rounds to kill the wizard
...Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhh
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>>40414855

Could've been a Chained Stone to Flesh if the wizard had enough metamagic mitigation.
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>>40401862
> What is player agency in RPGs?
> What is 'rewarding creative thinking' and being flexible as a GM?

This isn't carrot and stick, and for the record 'That DM' might as well have been wearing a conductors cap since he was railroading the shit out of that group. Only a complete fucktard would go "Gee, the PC is looking at a modern setting based off of their real life situation so it's totally unreasonable for the player to base their PC's actions off of that and the character's background and skill set."
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>>40410984
Holy shit that got me
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>>40403960
I would like to think that some players drinking and one being on pain pills from a fall he took earlier that day let us to the point it did.
I'd say we usually aren't that bad. Most that happens are shennanigans involving intimidating people out of their horses and using disproportionate force on old wanderers they find in the woods.
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>Be lvl. 1 DnD 5e Ranger.
>After a series of non stop fights, be down to 1 hp.
> One more shitting bandit to go.
>Bandit gets taken down by a surprise cleric that happene to enter the town.
D.M.:Roll to see if you stay conscious anon.
Rolls a 1, therefore passes out on top of the cleric.
>IC wake up in a tent with wounds healed.
>Head outside.
>Greeted by a jovial Rogue and a blushing Cleric.
Rogue:Hail Ranger, we are in need of a guide in this land.
>Join up and pathfind away.

And that is how our party met.

Well there was also an elven Ranger who was my bounty mark, who got caught btw. But she's a snooty elven bitch unlike the qt cleric so she's relegated as the stalker
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>>40411082
FUCK YOU



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