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/tg/ - Traditional Games

Can we get one of these going? Personal stories preferred. Try to avoid stories with obviously horrible bias
It's common courtesy to have one yourself. At least reposts, if not your own.
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I found That Guy.
Oh, alright. Sorry, I don't start threads often

>group consists of me, my two friends, and one of my friend's cousins
>cousin insist on inviting a new guy to our 5e group
>guy is literally 400 pounds
>like we have trouble finding a spot for him at the table
>keeps coughing violently and clearing his throat, which he spits out into a plastic bottle
>everyone shooting bad looks to the cousin already
>guy insists he plays his homebrew race/class
>some fetish ridden orc woman
>asks to start 3 levels ehad for plot reasons
>dm says no and after about an hour we start
>guy attemps to take over the grouop using the charisma both he and his character obviously lack
>near the climax of the game he leads us into a cave where the BBEG is hiding and he falls into a spiked pit
>hanging from a crack in the wall, he calls for help
>rogue and fighter collaborate to lower the rogue down
>rogue stabs him in the hands, sending him falling to his death
>guy gets upset and tries to storm out after throwing everything on the table over my head and mostly into the trash can
>falls as he tries to get up
>continuously insulting us as he struggles to get up, too prideful to let us help him up
>wait till the cousin helps him up, he starts to get flustered because he can't get him up
>dm tells him to not come back
>later hear him screaming at us from the street

It was pretty bad. The cousin's been unanimously banned from inviting friends again
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I've got a decent recent one. Well, if 4 months ago counts as recent.

> be me, FLGS employee
> tasked to run public games for overtime pay cause I've got fuck-all else to do on Tuesday nights
> run a D&D Next game for 3 to 4 faggots who show up
> that guy is named jonathan, and he is a big-time 4rry, you can tell from his attitude
> cheeto breath, black button down shirt, bulky fat guy, has a League of Legends T-shirt underneath
> didn't even know there were LoL T-shirts
> he brings 4 bottles of rootbeer but puts them down next to his seat
> proceeds to drink every bottle over the session
> literally 4 empty IBC bottles on the fucking table in front of him
> he's playing a female elf ranger (of course)
> rages whenever he gets a natural 1, starts to mark damage off of himself
> when I explain that's not how it works, he says "oh that's how my DM used to do it. If you got a natural 1 you damaged yourself"
> wtf.jpg

>FLGS employee

Oh god yes, please.
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How do these people exist..
Sure, go ahead
>try to avoid bias
Literally impossible.
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>Be new to 40k
> Play a match against some 300lb chaos asshole
>Only have time for a short game
> Tell him i'm playing fluffy marines ( lots of tacs)
> At 1500 pts he brings Belakor and 3 maulerfiends
>Belakor casts invisibility on Maulerfiends every turn
> Can't kill Belakor because muh 2+jink save
>He tables me without taking a single hit of damage
> I punch him in the face
> I get banned from GW store.
> Quit playing any sort of game because it's all the same pay to win bullshit

They don't. OP just made it up because people were bitching at him. It's shit that never happened, like 90% of /tg/ stories.

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>trying to sway a friend to join my group
>it's an Elder Scrolls game in the first era
>bunch of primitive human tribes enslaved by elves
>pcs lead the rebellion
>describe all the weird tribes to this chick
>mirror-skinned indians, chinese aztec peasants, nordic egyptians, manifest destiny zulus
>don't use the racial descriptions bc i think their cultures are more interesting than describing them by irl races
>her reaction?
>"Why should I care when all these are just based on white people?"
>mfw she missed out on a dope campaign bc she's the racist one
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>>He tables me without taking a single hit of damage
>> I punch him in the face
>> I get banned from GW store.
>> Quit playing any sort of game because it's all the same pay to win bullshit

sup That Guy
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No, because knowing you, it's either going to end up being a manifesto against WOC, Elves, or the girls you rejected you because you smell like cheese pizza all the time.

Do just mind-bogglingly stupid players count as That Guys?
I remember the /tgesg/ thread where you mentioned this. What did you say to her?
This is such an odd response to a setting, but it's happening more frequently now.
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> we continue the game
> Jonathan rages out when his character gets reduced to 0 hp, and starts rolling a fuckload of d10s
> you guessed it
> "that's how my DM used to do it"
> ask him why his DM did some retarded d10 dice pool mechanic for when you died
> "cause it made it more lethal that way"
> shrug, roll eyes, keep DMing
> other people, including business-woman-looking type in her 30s, are looking a bit uncomfortable
> later Jonathan gets a critical hit, and says "12 damage! fuck yeah!"
> watch business woman cringe at this outburst
> learned later she was his sister
> explain to jonathan it's not max damage like in 4e
> he says, "Wow that is some gay shit"
> tell him he needs to change his language
> says he's 23 he can talk how he wants
> start feeling embarassed, it's not my job to babysit these fucks
> end session as quickly as possible over the next half hour
> Jonathan goes outside, buys about 3 bags of dice (we're talking the pound o'dice you see at FLGS's everywhere)
> turns to me, says "I'll be back next Tuesday"
> Disappears into the night, sister in tow
>or the girls you rejected you because you smell like cheese pizza all the time.

Is that girls I rejected, or girls who rejected me?

I've never mentioned smelling like cheese pizza

I like pepperoni.

Also who is WOC?
>projecting this hard

Nice to know you.

Ever considered suicide?
She wanted to play a Dunmer in a third era game I was going to run, but I told her to fuck off. Haven't heard from her since.
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OP, your group is That Guy. It's tempting to always assume that the neckbeard is That Guy, but come on. Read your own post.

Fat Guy's Offenses
>Homebrew race
>ASKS to start 3 levels ahead

None of this actually hurts the other players. Homebrew race? A bit weird, that's it. Levels ahead? Okay its entitled and obnoxious, but what is it to you?

Group's offenses
>Hate some guy simply because he's fat and sickly
>Murder him for no in-game reason
>Get offended when the dude is upset
>Make fun of him on the internet
Honestly... What did he deserve to earn this? His actions were decidedly benign, whereas the group's were actively attempting to ruin his fun and humiliate him. Why? Because he's fat, sickly, and socially awkward.

Are you guys in highschool or something?
>recently an old friend offers to run a one shot while another old friend is in town.
>I'm thinking cool, it will be nice to get together again.
>dm says 3.5, level 25 no restrictions
>optimistically i think whatever, it can be fun.
>I make my character, a caster, i take the leadership feat to get a barbarian henchman and show up.
>the other two players hadn't made characters yet, understandable because 3.5 is a serious chore even without epic level gameplay.
>I help them create characters.
>game starts, its very bare-bones and hack and slashy. Not sure why this had to be 3.5 level 25 but at least i get to hang out with old friends.
>whole party has fun in the first 3 encounters, kick open doors, cleave enemies, crits, high fives.
>enemies dispel my follower.
>in final encounter 2 BBEG's focus on killing my character.
>party thinks it's odd because my character is hardly doing damage or controlling the battlefield.
>DM says "i just wanted to kill anon's character"
>rest of the game session loses excitement.
>other players are now just going through the motions of combat

The DM later said that he was still a little salty after I killed his character a long time ago.
I remembered the game and it was back in fucking high school.
In a oneshot it should be expected to lose a character. I am not mad about this however, I was just a little disappointed.

Anybody else get singled out by a DM?
Does anyone else know virtualoptim? He's our boards That Guy, filtering him was such a good call.

How hasn't he been banned for namefagging yet?
you can't be a bitch and play a dunmer, to play a dunmer you have to be bro-tier.
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>Read story.
>Guy posting it seems fine, not obviously making shit up.
>Notice it's virtualoptim
>He's actually posting without being a cunt.
>Wipe away tears
Now if only he's lose the trip.
I was thinking the same thing.

>fattie detected
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You did the right thing, anon.
virtualoptim stop
did you bang his sister doe?
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>Underage b& detected

Nice preschool insults man.
Why are fat people so defensive?

>captcha select all food.
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Beg pardon if im skeptical of his story, because I know what the hell this faggot has been doing on this board for a couple of days.
Well it does sound like his homebrew race was broken and also fetish filled, and asking to start three levels ahead is already ridiculous. They also took an hour more to start, so there was probably an argument.

Although I can't help but notice that most of the THAT GUY stories are "there was this fat guy".
you could be like the jonfag on /tv/ that posts from post his phone and computer so he can safely samefag
>Homebrew race.
>ASKS to start 3 levels ahead.
>Social retard.
I've kicked people out for less.
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>implying tripfags aren't petty enough to self-white-knight using a desktop and a phone with different IPs
>implying tripfags aren't petty enough to doctor a screencap

virtualoptim pls
How about we use occam's razor here. Do you really believe that?
I'm just saying I'm glad that he's not being a cunt as he normally is. There's no conspiracy about it.
>Although I can't help but notice that most of the THAT GUY stories are "there was this fat guy".

Don't forget that they always wear a T-shirt that invites ridicule and there's usually a creepy sexual element somewhere too.

It's because most of /tg/ isn't very original when it comes to making up shit that never happened.
You didn't just explain to her that she was mistaken?

N'wah, please.
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just wanted to share some odd stuff that happened
>playing with some friends
>group is pretty solid, we've been playing for almost 3 years
>it gets more serious with time as we "mature" as players, we enjoy it a lot
>we respect our GM, he's creative and intelligent, he provides a challenge and the stories are interesting
>suddendly he seems to be starting to lose interest
>sometimes players can't show up for sessions so we have to delay them to an other day
>this starts to stress the GM
>he explains how we have to take it seriously and commit to it
>we agree
>he becomes more serious about it and starts restricting our options to make more simple and less gamebreaking characters
>not a problem, i mean, sure it's harder, but it's better for everyone
>a couple of weeks ago he started a very long talk about how we sometimes can't show up
>we all explain our reasons
>he says that he doesn't care about reasons
>he says that he took all the last sessions as "a joke" and doesn't even take anything seriously anymore
>some of us (including him) have exams, that's the reason why we couldn't show up
>i try to help him and make him understand that we like his campaigns and respect him
>doesn't listen, doesn't care
>2 weeks later he writes one quick message
>"no ok i get it"
>he leaves the group

i was speechless, i don't understand, i'm a GM as well and i've always taken my players seriously and with respect, this honestly made me feel insulted, we all respect him and wanted to play yet he did this, i don't get it.
In a minute? I wish I was that good. Why the fuck is everyone blowing up about this, It's not like I'm sucking his cock.
>How about we use occam's razor here. Do you really believe that?

Yep. I believe they'd be that petty. They're attention-seeking outliers already just by tripfagging in the first place, so it's much less of a stretch than you're implying.

Also, virtualoptim pls stop.
>mfw im the other guy
Seriously virtualoptim has acted like a complete faggot before and i have called him out on it.
I'll probably do it again too.

Go away virtualoptim.
>Implying that writing such an acerbic and gay post doesn't make you just as bad.
Stealthy letting us know you haven't had any of your ribs removed.
Not sure why you think we care, virtualoptim
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>DMing for my friends
>One player points out that there hasn't been any female NPCs
>Realize he's right, all of the NPCs they've interacted with are male
>Alright, I'll make sure to include some women NPCs, it's only been a couple sessions
>Party goes to shop
>Shopkeeper is woman and, at best, a throwaway character
>"Oh finally, a woman"
>Use my normal voice to voice her
>"And she sounds just like Anon!"

>Spends majority of sessions joking, going on tangents, riffing on the campaign's events right in front of me, and talking over other players

Why is my friend so rude when he plays?
>all this futile damage control

You're just making us despise you even more, virtualoptim.
Because namefield

Also, no, no one knows who the fuck he is or why we should care.
>acerbic and gay

whoa epic burn
How often do his characters die?
stop derailing the damn thread
Hey, I've gone to PFS and seen balding overweight 20-somethings with fedoras and My Little Pony tee shirts under unbuttoned screen printed button ups, who don't know the rules to the game but try minmaxing, and keep their character sheets on their laptop with suspicious stains on the back of it.

These people exist, I'm just noticing that people are more likely to see someone as THAT GUY if they're overweight. Or a girl.
>Also, no, no one knows who the fuck he is or why we should care.
Well that's just a blatant lie. Most 5e generals have to start with a reminder to ignore virt in particular, or else he'll just shit up the thread with literal "STOP LIKING WHAT I DON'T LIKE!!!"
I can also tell that you've never been in a Dungeon World thread. Did you know that virtualoptim actually made a youtube video of all the reasons that people should stop liking Dungeon World because he doesn't like it?
It will be a use a know faggot is in this thread,

Pls stop virtualoptim. No one cares.
>Stealthy letting us know you haven't had any of your ribs removed.
That's a myth. Ribs won't help, you need limber vertebrae.
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>See story on this thread
>Read it
>It's not shit.
>Notice guy who's normally an asshole isn't being one.
>Make a post about it
>Everyone shits their pants in anger
>Someone agrees with me.
>Watch as everyone flips their shit.
>Wonder what the tripfag and other guy are doing.
>mfw /tg/ is That Guy.
That would be all of my stories of That Guy that don't end in, "He/she was not invited a second time."
You mean to tell me that everyone on the board isn't in the same generals? Shock!
There's no way I could despise him more.
This thread was better before everyone started dogpiling a namefag.

The downside to namefags isn't the namefags, it's the faggots who turn every thread into shitflinging about them.
Oh, is that that whoremonger with a total rageboner for Dungeon World and won't stop whining about how it's not a real game or w/e?
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>I partake in general and/or quest threads
I know this is a that guy thread but could you not?
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>he made a YouTube video about dungeon world.

>MFW that much autism.
Fucking Glorious.
If namefags didn't namefag no one would shit on them for their namefagging.
I mean to tell you that people know who he is, and if you aren't going into several of the fairly popular generals (he shitposts in MtG threads too) as well as all of the other threads VO rears his ugly head, maybe you shouldn't act like something that isn't known to you can't possibly be known to other people.
Link? I'm curious.
You must not have been here long enough virtualoptim. Because you do one decent thing, doesn't mean we'll forget the shit you've done
Not gonna lie, until the end there that was pretty nice form. His thrust game was A+

My point is that you're making the thread worse. He hasn't even posted in half an hour.
I'm the mfw guy, I haven't seen it but just the fact he went through the trouble of making a video about a game, shows me how much stupid and autistic is in this tripfag.
>be me
>convince someone to come over to play brik wars
>they bring knetics instead of legos
>can't even make a convincing figure, let alone a coherent army
>keys my car after I make him leave
I assure you that this isn't someone posting under his name trying to be autistic in order to ruin him, he's linked these himself in order to prove his point.
>nordic egpytians

Nordic nords*

Mixing cultures and races is fucking stupid if you're using humans. If my vikings are black or my aztecs are pale, you know the game will be shitty.
>>Irc games
>This one bitch
>makes ludicriously overpowered monsters >always require divine intervention from gmpc
>Game gets canceled
>She joins in another game
>Tries to make it all about her
>Butts into other people's skill checks and rp
>Gets ultra-offended when a player tells her she's not helping
>First and only table flip I've ever seen.
>Never paid for her share of pizza.
I'm with you man, that guy is a fucker.
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This is painful.
Do you usually defend tripfags?
His fault, and marks him as a self-centered piece of shit.
Aka, has disgusting fucking health issues due to his self-inflicted obesity.
>Homebrew race
>Asks to start three levels ahead
Self-centered dickcheese confirmed

I'm gonna go ahead and guess you're an overweight piece of shit yourself.
>doesn't post his face
Virt confirmed for being ugly as sin.
> be me.
> be enjoying roleplay doing face-time for the group.
> one player starts making complicated rolls but I and the other players understand, as does DM.
> other player with same class starts getting confused. discovers spaghetti in their pockets.
> I and everyone else ignores. Push for scene to continue.
> said player pipes up that they are not enjoying the game, speaking personally in front of everyone to the DM.
> Restrain the urge to kill said player with heat beam eyes.
> second other player fails their willpower roll. calls them on their bullshit.
> much spaghetti spills onto floor.
> while said player is getting chewed, I focus on the scene and preserve the game regardless.
> first other player finishes rolling.
> we continue regardless of spaghetti.

> have to clean up spaghetti later.

No. Not my type. I felt bad for her though. Having a brother like that must be hell.

I do have a semi-related story to that, though

> be me
> running my first public game (D&D 4e)
> at same store, but this was before i worked there, it was back in late '08
> big craze of new players
> lots of people have never played before
> some dude and hipster girl, 7/10 but thats just me
> they are playing together I get this feeling they are in relationship
> running game, its going well
> 4e pisses me off but it's low-level and that's when it's good in my opinion
> this girl stares at me throughout game
> start getting pissed imagining her thoughts
> "what a nerd loser, i can't believe my BF brought me to this game, fuck him and his nerd shit"
> game ends, she looks positively angry
> her bf goes to look at dice, she stays and starts talking to me
> completely caught off guard

continued in next post.

>couple of days.

You must be new.
>Small bit of backstory
Me and this guy were in a previous game where he was lawful good paladin-tier moralist while saying he was neutral while I was your typical evil gnome, hi-jinks and all. Things were a bit tense.
>What happened in our new campaign
DM basically gives us four different ways to get out of a city that's being plagued by demon spawn and under a lock-down because of an actual plague. There's two gang routes, a cloak and dagger route, and the help-a-noble route. Most of the party decides to look into the sewer gang route. I do the dew. Help with combating some monsters in the tunnel for gangsters. Chores for the prospect of getting out of town. It's taking a while. I had taken some plot-hooks earlier and know about the cloak route along with our ranger, so after they say they're going to an inn, we say we're off to talk with the guy. We get the quest, helping collect taxes in the form of product, which was frowned upon in this world for some reason, so that the organisation run by the guy could strike a profit outside of the city, because some people were too poor to pay on their own. Then, out of God damn nowhere, paladin-bro decides that he'll decide to take the noble route and collect taxes from everywhere, at late dusk, and to make the noble come along. His character was literally in bed. He had said, in character, that he wouldn't do the noble route in a million years. Me and the ranger managed to out think him, but it added an extra two fucking hours to the simplest task imaginable. Afterwards he said it was just to fuck with me. Fuck that guy.
It happens. With some people, you only realize they were attention-whoring drama queens the moment they stop being the center of attention, and they feel the need to re-assert themselves.
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Might not necessarily be "That Guy," but a dumb player.

>>Star Wars: Force and Destiny Beta.
>>Two Jedi and a Smuggler. We'll call them John, Jane, and Sam respectively.
>>John and Sam have solid characters. Good RPing. Understand the concept of the game's morality system. GM challenges, they pass or fail, characters develop as a result.
>>Jane refuses to use the Morality system, but voluntariy inflicts the system on his character because he wants to be hyperbolicly emotionally tortured and edgy. Without GM approval or permission. This ends up making a supposedly 29 year old soldier character act like a spoiled 14 year old.
>>Jane is also kinda dumb.
>>Misty Mountains, group seeking a person to tell them where BBEG is. Find an ancient Anzat (google it yourselves) in a Shaolin-style temple. who may be who they seek.
>>Anzat does the Yoda-First-Impression/Pai Mei thing, acting like a cantankerous old asian man trying to kick kids off his lawn.
>>Bob sits down, ignoring the codger's bluster, studies the situation.
>>John has a bit of bravado, wary of the Anzat but challenging its unwelcome attitude and decision not to engage in civil conversation. Bob guesses the Anzat's bluster is a kung-fu style test.

it's strange, he never looked like the kind of guy who wanted attention, he did become quite "despotic" by the end of it though.
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>Guy prides himself on being "a dick"
>Not just being a dick, I mean he mistreats everyone in the group
>Like 500 pounds. Talks with his mouth full while he's stuffing it full of food.
>Refuses to be a team player and if anyone does something in-game that upsets him he'll bitch about until the other person gives in just because otherwise he'll waste half an hour of the session to talk about it
>Has gone out of his way to try and kill off my character in one campaign because it's too similar to his and he wants to be a special snowflake
>On a night where I was having bad luck with my rolls and not hitting anything, he shouted "Don't roll a 1!" as I was rolling to hit. I rolled a 1 and he proceeded to laugh his ass off at me while spitting food crumbs all over the table
>When he GMs he just makes it his goal to make us all die instead of having the session be fun and engaging. He prides himself on this by calling himself, "The Evil GM"
>To top it all off he has this grating laugh that sounds like a mixture between a cat hissing & nails on a chalkboard

He's just a self-centered manchild. I don't know how much longer we're gonna be able to put up with it since even the more patient ones are starting to find it grating. He's ruined a good deal of campaigns with his asshole-atry.
This isn't that bad, I've seen people do put just as much effor--oh God, it's a rap. Why.
>Using voice program

The actual complaints one seems pretty spot on, though. No idea why it needs to be in video form.
What kind of character did the business woman play? Was she any good? I find this terribly interesting for some reason.

>>Jane begins yelling at the Anzat, begins resorting to really, really childish insults in an attempt to sound clever. The Anzat is amused. Jane won't attack, but seems to forget that it was the party that sought the Anzat out, and threatens to leave. The Anzat encourages them to do so.
>>Jane's continued insults and John's bravado eventually lead to the Anzat disappearing in disgust.
>>Group eventually determines he's a Jedi Master, mostly due to Bob's calm observation and Bob guiding John's eventual investigation of the surrounding monestary.
>>Anzat disappointed that these Jedi are so immature and impatient. Agrees to help, but isn't really enthusiastic about it.
>>Jane seems willing to learn. GM sees this as a chance to finally provide some character growth for Jane.
>>Anzat encourages Jane to punch a nearby glistening black pillar. Without hesitation, Jane punches the pillar, lined with sharp volcanic glass. Wounds ensue, no damage to massive pillar.
>>Player enthusiasitcally pantomimes this, but seems to think he is doing a cool power punch.
>>Anzat suggests Jane might be able to "surprise the pillar by feinting to the left," with a obviously michevious tone. While Bob and John look on in horror, Jane enthusiastically punches the pillar with her other fist. Blood and wounds repeat.
>>Player does this again, actually punching the IRL wall, players looking on in horror. When they ask him to calm down and stop (both IRL and IC), Jane snaps and tells them to shut up, since its his scene.
>>Anzat suggests kicking the pillar with a low leg sweep. Jane does so, boots scraping and shins bleeding. Anzat, the party, and the GM are each surprised that Jane is still following these obviously harmful suggestions.
>>Lesson of 'anger and hate only hurts those who seek to use it against life' is lost as Jane stares at the GM, expecting further instructions.
>>GM's disappointment is as evident as Jane's blank expression.
Not very often, although he got knocked unconscious early on in the current campaign and acts like his character "saw the light". That'd be fine if all that "I saw the face of death, and he told me 'fuck you'" (actual quote, by the way) was in character, but nope, purely OOC.

But don't get me wrong, he's actually a nice person. I'm gonna talk to him about this stuff once I can get hold of him.

continued, sorry for delay

> basically this girl gives me her number so i can let her know when the next game is
> leaves with a smile at me
> literally floored by this shit
> go home, do not call her, do not text her
> she shows up to next game without the guy
> ask where her boyfriend is
> "oh, teehee, he's just a friend"
> continues to flirt with me throughout game
> makes no sense to me
> like an idiot i start to reciprocate
> also make sure to include items she wanted in treasure
> only a few to not look suspicious
> she finds out my real name from an asshole friend who worked at the store
> he later got me the job so no complaints
> get fb friend request from her
> accept it, turns out her "friend" actually is her bf
> completely confused as to why the fuck she'd try to seduce a public gaming GM.
> she still shows up to every session of what is a drop-in-drop-out-type campaign for people to try 4th edition

cont. in next post
>be 16
>getting into D&D with friends
>all having a good time getting to know it
>half way through we always take a 15-20 min break to stretch
>one guy always goes to smoke in his car
>one day I go to get him
>he is fapping
>turn back don' let him see me
>tell everyone
>we all keep quiet about it
>start to notice he never comes back smelling like smoke
>guy is fapping every break

It was so awkward after that, no one wanted to bring it up and he was the kinda guy who forgot his dice sometimes and would ask to borrow.
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I know. Borrowing dice. Sheesh.
Kind of agree with this guy. If I was one of the players, sure, my enthusiasm would be sapped because I'm playing with a big sick guy who's indulging a fetish or two, but killing his character for no in-game reason? Sounds kinda shitty

I can only wonder what it would've sounded like to hear him hocking into a bottle. God.

She played a gnome bard. Yeah. Didn't understand either. She was actually a decent player, yeah. Apparently she works selling cars, just likes the formal look apparently. Talked to her a few times when she revisited without her retard brother. Apparently he's been banned from some Pathfinder club at the local library, as well.


anyway, continuing from above

> she starts saying hi to me alot on fb
> eventually admits her boyfriend is real
> says he mistreats her
> not like abuse, just is a shitty bf, is distant, etc.
> says she wants to learn how to DM
> asks if she can come over so I can teach her
> like an autist I say yes, fully expecting to spend 3 hours teaching a cute girl to DM
> the lesson lasts half an hour before she starts trying to fuck me
> ends up doing so
> cries afterwards, saying it was a mistake and that she was just so sick of her bf and mad at him
> next session
> her bf shows up again
> actually punches me in the face, hard, knocking me on the ground
> get back up and take out a shitty pocket knife i carried for opening shrinkwrap when i helped unpack books at the store sometimes
> (had that transitional phase at FLGS where I hung out and helped them do shit in between chilling with employees. it's a good way to get hired if it's a family-owned store)
> anyway, he gets banned from the store forever
> i get banned too for having a knife / threatening with it
> no one presses charges because of how awkward shit is
> i eventually get unbanned because of friend
> end up working there
> never see girl again
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>he was the kinda guy who forgot his dice sometimes and would ask to borrow.
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holy fuck, your DM is Pete

the lever releases a guillotine on donald duck
Does he listen to metal?
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I think his thing is 5e, these days. I wouldn't be surprised if he's over in their general shitting up the thread.
Nah, we haven't seen him there for a long time.
You poor, poor bastard. And I thought the min-max Jawa heavy I had in my game was bad.

Jane's player always plays the emotionally tortured type character. He's also kinda dumb. Combine these together, and he always makes these "off" characters:

>>The Rage-Fueled Jedi in a group of good Jedi.
>>The loyal Imperial Tie-Fighter engineer in the middle of a group of anti-Imperial Outer Rim Smugglers.
>>The Drow priestess in a surface ocean Pirates game.

He wants drama and RPing, but always wants to be the extremely different than everyone. Its both frustrating and implies a sad kind of psychology.

Plus, surprise surprise, he's a really bad communicator, who for some reason thinks he has the skills to talk is way around needing skill checks, when he can barely hold eye contact with average people.

Well then, here is a tale of idiocy, albeit no malice.

>Players assaulting this bugbear clan that has taken over an abandoned fort.
>They're looking for a particular crystal that has certain magical properties
>It's bound to be heavily guarded.
>In fact, they reason, it's likely to be guarded by something too strong to be directly fought by the time they've weakened themselves fighting the outer guards.
>Approaching the fort, do well with stealth.
>Manage to slip in through a weakpoint, take the guards by surprise, kill them all before they can sound the alarm.
>At this point, they mull over their next move, send the rogue ahead to do some scouting.
>He comes back with some reports of the patrols.
>Couldn't directly approach the chamber with their prize without a too high risk of being spotted.
>Brief huddle.
>Party leader takes up a big hammer, starts ringing the alarm bell that the bugbears were trying to get to.
>Hightail it out of the room they were in, smash a patrol group, and wait for everyone to converge on the room they were in.
>The bugbears, not being idiots, do not do this.
>Instead, they're now awake, alert, and starting to send their bits of scrying spells.
>Not long after, they're spotted, and half the damn clan turns out to meet them, and we get a TPK.
>Party blames the rogue because "someone must have noticed you and you didn't realize."
Because he probably sucks dick for a living and wants to go back to doing what he loves.
Oh man, it would have been a learning moment for the player to have get killed that way, because he doesn't get it. (Of course that may make him a that gm)

I played a edge lord as a cleric as my first character ever, war vet and all, turns out I wasn't having fun, and I made one of my favorite characters, a half orc barbarian, giod times were had.
Wait, did you give them perception or will saves to notice the magical sensors and scrying checks to resist? Because if they didn't even have a heads up for it, they might not have even expected it.
>resist scrying
what type of shitty system are you playing on nerd

also, if the players die to something that they didn't expect, it's their own fault
What they lack in speed and agility they make up for in defense.
I have a similar story:

>7/10 is in 2 different games with me
>Never on time to game, sometimes arriving 2 hours late, different excuse every time
>Never answers texts or calls because her phone is always dead
>Have to loan her a phone charger during game so she can constantly text her asshole bf, otherwise he comes over to the FLGS and disrupts the game
>spends the entire game texting or looking at Facebook
>insists that her home state of Kansas is part of "The South"
>dips, and constantly spits into a bottle or can
>once spit into my drink thinking it was her empty can, didn't realize until I took a swig
>has to do every bit of math by counting her fingers
>her bf "cleaned the house" and threw away all her character sheets, but she didn't tell anybody she was dropping out of the game(s) for 2 weeks
>won't get kicked out of the one game because she's friends with the GM and the GM is a softie
The GM seems like a dick in this scenario. Not only are bugbears (creatures that aren't exactly lauded for their intelligence) so smart and prepared that they have scrying spells, but they also explicitly do not do something perfectly rational to do (converging or at least investigating a point of commotion in an area that they're guarding) seemingly ONLY because the PCs are expecting that thing to happen. Then, once the players are spotted, that whole line of "why would we waste a bunch of guards converging on one point" goes out the window and half the clan shows up.
I may just be reading too much into it, but it feels like the GM has it out for the players in this scenario.

Like >>40788558

implied, in system, you don't get a passive save just because someone's trying to scry you. You'd need special (and bulky, generally non-carryable) equipment to try to pick up on something like that.

Of course, if they hadn't rung the alarm bell, there wouldn't have been any cause to scry in the first place........
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>Our forever GM has schedule change on him, can't continue the game.
>Doesn't want to switch times because he's already running another game.
>I offer take the reigns and start a new game.
>Use this chance to ditch a few problematic players, old GM joins us.
>Let players know to make interesting characters, not just min-max.
>Hint that I'll be throwing them XP new toys regularly.
>Everyone makes cool characters, except old GM
>Character is gimped as fuck, below average for everything
>Doesn't even have the normal class specific skills.
>I confront him on these bad ideas, but he's adamant about it.
>Ex-GM lets me know he wants x XP
>Let him know he's gonna have to work for it.
>Come first session, he's loud and obnoxious. Doesn't shut up.
>Other players wonder why he's so gimped.
>OldGM gets defensive when others raise doubts.
>Players complain to me after the game about oldGM.
>Let him know people had issue with his motor mouthing.
>Gets offended, starts threatening to leave the group.
>Mission reward was only half of what he wanted.
>Let him know plans for him to earn other half.
>Gets mad, people start pointing out he's playing a broken character.
>Salt flows, drama starts.
>Thankfully, he puts his big-boy pants on and rolls a new character.
>It's just min-maxed shit.
>Still expects me to apologise for the whole mess.

You're a good friend man, but why you gotta pull shit like this on me?


Because bugbears are not stupid. And they're defending a fortification they've had for a couple of years besides. You're not going to get the entire clan to turn out just because someone rang a noise. Instead, a double patrol investigated, (which the players didn't see because they'd already have left) and reported a bunch of dead guys but no intruders.

Then, when they reported back, that's when the scries started spinning out. And for people who live by raiding, having magical means of detection are pretty important.

Half the clan converges once they have a solid hit and know who and what they're going after, especially knowing that this group apparently took out the guards fast enough to keep them from sounding the alarm, since none of the bodies were close to the bell.
Or you know, the dm couldn't be a vindictive little bitch and play bug bears like bug bears.
I'd expect this shit from creatures like hobgoblins (assuming it's 5th ed, 4th ed, pathfinder, or and d20 game that isn't LOTFP.) But creatures as dumb as bug bears.
also, if it is assumed d20 game, you get save vs scrying regardless of any special equipment.

In short, bad dm is bad.

If you're playing DnD (Which for the record, we weren't) bugbears have equal intelligence to humans. They're not going to just charge in like idiots, any more or less than if this was a fort with human brigands.
People have issues. A lot of issues. They come out when you get more heavily involved with people.

My current roleplaying group is fantastic for energy and interest and doing things in game to make it really interesting, but every second week now I do damage control because the emotions of highly strung nerds are incredibly fragile things.
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Interesting! ( I'm >>40788475 )
Perhaps it is just my tastes, I just feel that sometimes the idea of "They are intelegent, of course they would X" is a bit bitter in my mouth, not neccissary bad by any means, but it must be used wisely- Steam power was known about sense the greek, including for it's rotational power, but it was not put to locomotion until a few centuries ago. It's not a matter of them not being intelegent, it's a matter of "Would they be organized and have explored this before".

Otherwise I suggested saves or perception is because at the same time that I agree that the plan was foolhearty, it also feels a bit cruel that they wouldn't get a second chance. While it may be obvious to you from an OOC standpoint, remember that not everything is immediately easy to identify from the other side- some people need HUGE hints.

Just my shitty opinions though.
Well if you told us the system you played it would change my idea of what I said.
and even being as smart as a normal human doesn't mean smart enough to cast a spell lime scry, which again, the system can say otherwise.
>thinking taking off your trip makes you a different person
Fuck off virtualoptim.
You're a bit l8, m8.
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>make magic user character, first character I ever made and understood
>rules of the game say magic users can make magic items, so I indulge myself in making them
>since it's dnd, there's shopping lists of magic items
>read through a ton of books to find good ones for group and myself
>shit out magic items that my, and other characters, better
>other player starts accusing me of power gaming because of the magic items I've been making
I can't even tell anymore if I'm that guy or if he's overreacting
I just want my party to not get killed and have fun
>Because bugbears are not stupid
Traditionally they aren't all that smart, either. Multiple scrying spells is not a strategy that should be in the book of a bunch of average (most likely lower than average) intelligence monsters. Doesn't it seem a bit much?
>You're not going to get the entire clan to turn out just because someone rang a noise.
But you'll get half the clan for four people? Again, it's a bit much, don't you think? You're cherry picking when and why the bugbears get to act smart in order to give them a clear advantage. You say that they've guarded this place for a while now, but they intentionally weaken themselves to half strength over four people, without a second thought as to the fact that maybe it's a distraction? Also no thought given to the fact that nondetection spells are usually a thing? It just seems tailored to go against the players.
All you can do is believe in the wise words of Hammer;

"Stop- Collaborate and listen."
Take a moment, ask the rest of the party how they feel of it, and if it ends up everyone feels that way, then consider retraining specialties if the GM allows that or offer to retire as an NPC if you can. If they do like it, check out the deal with the guy, and if possible patch it up- no purpose in bad blood over a fun game.
not /tg/ but those girls at concerts that stand in front and hold their phones up the whole time taking pictures they'll never look at again. Fuck those people.
You hold a good point, I just like being able to give my party members magic items they can use effectively
You sound Bro-tier then, or even hilarious if this ends up being batman. I mean, what did the other guy do as a personal thing though? Was he originally the buff-master dood, was he a frontliner? Did his job at all somehow get intruded on by your effects?

And is it any worse than "They are stupid, of course they would make mistake Y"?


It's called Dragonquest. I don't often mention it because practically nobody's heard of it. (And tbh, it's classless, and I use terms like "rogue" more because I'm translating into DnD than it's an actual rogue running around)


You'll get half the clan for intruders in their perimeter, who are confirmed in a given location and who have already demonstrated some pretty serious lethality. Especially when you've been throwing around scries and you're pretty certain you don't have other intruders skulking about.
>Thinks Kansas is part of the South
>Can't do math

One of these things is not like the other.
Okay, sorry about the anger, because people just assume one system when it's fantasy (like d20 games).
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How frequent are That Guy sightings?
IIRC you people used to say bad groups where far too common.
I have never played any tabletop roleplaying game before and I'm currently gathering courage to post in a game finder thread.
But every time I see this kind of thread I shudder to think of what I'm in for ,or what evils I'll be unintentionally releasing uppon a group. assuming I get to play ofc.
>is it any worse than
No not really, moderate trains of thought are always welcome however. A request for the cease of an extreme is not the demand for the opposite extreme.

Otherwise I do agree, personally, with your use of scry, if such a group had such things. Perhaps though with such a large number of attackers, unless the point was lethality, you could have instead had them capture with clubs and nets, and then given them the gratuitious arena plotline that requires short shorts and crotch armor and eventually a player versus player fight that they would either fight remorsefully or refuse and attempt to stand against waves of rolling enemies trying to kill them sense they didn't fight, ending in a glorious death or escape, and a new set of enemies- the Bugbear of Fort X, bearing down on their heels.

I don't doubt that your people had a fun time, I think it's great that they did, I'm simply stating how I feel. Don't be bothered by my opinions- you and me put on our pants the same way in the mornings, one tentacled limb at a time.
None of my Dat Guy moments refer to /tg/ material, sadly I only have stories about my /v/ydia group.


Tell then either way.

At least it's authentic. Most of the shit in these threads are works of fiction that rival 40k.
GMing for 20+ people at a game store, between 3 different days. Closest we have to a that guy is an overexcited kid, and a veteran who uses the best spells. So im happy, no that guys so far.
Then you are that guy.


> Playing Chivalry: Medieval Warfare with new group
> One guy is your classical /pol/ tard that thinks too highly of himself
> Constantly talking down to others
> Smug all the time
> Every time he dies he comes up with an excuse "my mouse lagged" or "I can't work this sword".
> Y'all know the drill
> Duel Map rolls
> He decides to square down with another member of the group
> This other guy is a suave as fuck dude, good natured guy that enjoys fun. Let's call him Bro.
> Anyway, off they go
> /pol/tard getting recked by Bro
> 1 to 7
> Bro playing Vanguard with Halberd, being a sportsman and just having fan
> /pol/tard playing knight with shield and mace (Ultra OP combo btw) silently raging like mad
> We can hear him furiously smashing his keyboard
> Bro wins 8th victory
> Round over
> /pol/tard demanding rematch, annoys the server admin for 30 minutes to put back the duel map
> Of they go again
> Bro recking /pol/friend still
> /pol/tard getting more and more aggressive
> Starts throwing a bitchfit, demads Bro change his class and loadout
> Bro rocks a fucking archer with a dagger
> Still recks /pol/tard with a fucking bread knife
> Teamspeak goes silent
> Next thing we hear is "YOU FUCKING SON OF A BITCH"
> Keyboard smashing
> Chairs being flipped
> /pol/tard mom's yelling in the background
> Death threats to Bro
> "User disconnected from your channel"

Next day he logged back as if nothing had happened.

... why people haff to be mad?
Told this story before, and I wonder if it is my fault many a time and it could easily be but;

>Forever GM of the group asks for a day off, we are playing a Pathfinder game with Gestalt rules, stupid powerful but I am the only one with any experience with the system, so noone is immediately overpowered, just silly. This was GM's idea.
>We are closing in on a big plotpoint, and Gm wants to encourage other people to GM, and sense I am competent, he asks me to take over- All I have to do is set an encounter with an enemy general, same character creation rules, so on so forth.
>Being me, I know that the party is GREAT at single target takedown, but shitty at group combat due mostly to our tendency to be caster heavy. I am not an innocent in this, squishy all the way.
>So I create a lvl 8 Cavalier/Fighter => Hellknight/Cavalier, Focus on chainfighting and tripping. I probably should have thought of the fact that tripping someone might be fun, but being the target of it is the least fun thing of all.

>First part of the encounter is a fight with the front room guards. They gank the five guards with create pit +pelting with other spells and arrows, giggling the whole time.
>They get in. Big dramatic speeches aho- Nope.
>GMPC, a greatsword wielding fighter/cleric who attempts to abuse channel negitive energy to both be more mysterious and also deal more damage while brooding, does what I expect- Rushes in headfirst. Strkes his enemy while his enemy does not expect it. Surprise round initiated.
>Players start the game, and I know every play. Buff the fighter for max damage and attempt to area-control with tanglefoot, bardic musics. DMPC attacks generally seem to do less damage than usual, due to high DR and AC, GM gets frustrated and asks me if I am cheating. We move on.

> Enemy turn. He steps back, and then summons up his order ability- three hellhounds come to the field, and flank around to antagonize the buffers and my character- who I kept generally away from the combat due to not wanting to affect play
>GM once again starts to get a bit fustrated, I tell him I will show him the source after the game- because I don't want to spend all of the limited time we have to just argue over rules.
> Player turn- GMPC Charges.
> Hellknight takes advantage of him charging. Uses an attack of opportunity that chains into a trip, throws him on his back.
>Gm starts turning red. I start to realize maybe I'm being too harsh, but like the slavering autist I am, I have to be tactically correct about the bonuses on damage.
> Other players attempt to run interference, heal the GMPC back up and the rogue-mage attempts to flank around to get to helping, at the expense of being antagonized by hellhounds.
> Enemy turn- Enemy backs up and starts the antagonist "Kneel before me!" rant in order to give the players extra time to respond, the hellhounds routing them away from the exits and attempting to cluster them together- hinting at their breath weapon.
>GM just demands his turn. Says he is getting back up.
>Autism gets the better of me. Standing up provokes an attack of opportunity-
>I hear ripping of paper. "My character is dead. You killed him." the halves are thrown at me and he stands up. "Good job, fucking looser."

I mean, it's been two years nearly now, and we made up for it, but goddamn. I don't know if I was just major-asshole there or if he lost it or if it was an equal tug of war of both of us, but it still bugs me to this day.
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Am I That Guy?

>Ban one of my players who is consistently and unapologetically two hours late from a 2e campaign
>Cancel campaigns I run because no one from my group can be arsed to turn up, they don't apologise, and then whine about how lazy they are and how turning up for sessions is hard
>Excuse myself from my old RPG group by saying that I'm "burnt out" on RPGs but the truth is I don't want to play with a group where 2/3 of the regular players insist on rolling one type of character and get shitty when I ban Evil alignment and Drow from D&D
Sounds like you were playing at a different level than that GM was used to as a player and probably as a GM as well. He was probably expecting to just roll all over some amateur encounter building but instead you went kill mode.

Just curious how did the other players do in that encounter? Any other deaths? Did they defeat it in the end?
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As someone who plays a lot of chivalry
>Halberd is an excellent weapon
>Mace and Shield is not the most OP thing a Knight can do
>Archers with knives are the deadliest fucking thing in the game
I once played an all guardsman party with helpful_comrade.
Sometimes I think I have a that group.

>DM loves high power levels especially with NPCs. Every NPC is hot chick, nametag free moon or crazy old man.

>player one. Bard mindset, if it breathes I can fuck it. Nine out of ten games the party face. Runs /d/ type odd sex all the time.

>player three. Always super fop noble. Always. This campaign he is French. Wishes he was player one and always asks how hot is she. Takes ten minutes to finish a sentence and hissies if we ignore him for any part. Always backstabs party. Always.

>player three. Comes to game high/drunk. Steps outside every hour or so to smoke a cig. Doesn't bother to learn system just states crazy plan and asks DM what he needs to roll for it. The worst at plans. Keeps getting stuck as party leader.

Yet its still the best group I've played with in years. The serious groups just end up grimderp.

>dammit captcha cakes arrent cookies.
The other players were faring fine- the hellhounds were a joke, the damage was a joke. I just forced them to have to not use the usual tactic of rush in head first and flank, and what I thought was well communicated in the form of "You probably should reevaluate the tactical choices and try something new" ended up with the Gm quitting. The rest were alright until he ripped his sheet up, at which point the game simply didn't continue.

Yeah, it was very likely that I was playing at a different spectrum of ideas, I thought what I did was okay. After half a year they let me run something quick for the forever Gm to enjoy, in a new campaign (because that one stopped because GM refused to continue after that event) and beyond a few bumps (Like "That halfling shouldn't be able to use that feat against my tiger!") it blew over fairly well, I mean, beyond me making a really stupid necromancer joke about cheese. Me and him get along fine,
Personally I'd appreciate an enemy who uses their full arsenal against the players. All the time.

I mean what the fuck are all those rules for? The only reason I'd think not to use the full tactical arsenal an enemy has is because it'd take too much time for the mookiest of mooks. It is so much more satisfying when your character actually has a chance of death.

That said a lot of GM's think they know how to play the system better than the players and so get cocky.
The main thing is that you are having fun.
I could agree personally, I mean, they are supposed to be an imposing enemy, not a prefigure- their full being is being channeled in battle, and to die simply holding back instead of trying to fight for their life, is simply disrespect of character. But then, I also discovered that it works both ways- Player doesn't want to feel disenfranchised and worthless and just be punked because I made an enemy who can fuck them right back.
I would love to throw everything I had at my players strategy-wise. I'm just waiting for them to start using strategy of their own instead of just attacking whoever is nearest to them. It's only been about 3 years since we started, surely they'll get better. Any time now.
>But then, I also discovered that it works both ways- Player doesn't want to feel disenfranchised and worthless and just be punked because I made an enemy who can fuck them right back.

Yeah, it is a fine line, and of course the majority of people just want a simple power trip i.e. look at all the doods I killed. Most people won't react well to their mistakes being exposed by a competent opponent because they won't be able to react as a group, let alone as individuals. The best game experiences I've had were when there were no punches pulled and through luck/skill/gambling my character came through.
What does flgs stand for? I assume the lgs is for local game store.
'Friendly' LGS
honestly, I can't really blame him?

If he's been consistently the gm, he's had to plan out everything, and if the game can't continue if people leave for whatever reason and it delays to another day of the week, that could be impacting his own personal plans and it shows little respect to the gm when the day for a game can't be set aside regularly.

My group has the rule of 'if you can't make it to a game, your character is kinda just there but doesn't do shit if they can't be explained away, or else they aren't there.' because when people keep cancelling because of plans, it IS really inconvenient.
>honestly, I can't really blame him?
Not that guy, but I certainly would blame him. Real world obligations - Exams, as that anon stated - are more important than a hobby.

If the DM couldn't recognize that fact, the fault lies with him.

Honestly, if he doesn't care about the players having exams and doesn't care about his own, then it sounds like the DM has an unhealthy mindset with the game. He's neglecting his responsibilities for the sake of his hobby.
But who the fuck was Bob?
No, I'll give you exams or personal emergencies. But if this is as often as a problem that it seems to be stated it can't constantly be exams and its more than one person doing it. as for as that guy posted, only the most recent one had been exams.

There's also the fact that when you have personal obligations that are consistent enough to constantly impact the game you should have the decency to excuse yourself from the campaign than to make everyone constantly delay the game days.

And this is from my personal opinion, but I feel that being in a group is a social obligation you've committed yourself to, so unless its an important obligation (exam, work, sick, family emergency) you should set that time away and not schedule other things on that time and if your obligations will keep you away for an extended or consistent period of time, you should inform the group to continue without you.

And this is personal opinion here: if you're so strapped for time that you can't schedule your personal errands or a date at any other time, then you need to consider what your priorities are and inform the group because constantly ditching game night to go on a date means that you've either got no time to game or that you consider other things as higher priority than the game and bow out instead of inconveniencing everyone else.
My players are all great but one really enjoys curses, flaws, madness general bad things to happen to his char. Its interesting but can negatively impact group when his char acts contrary to group opinion. Not really That Guy though
Everyone has to start somewhere. Learning about the That Guys is kind of an interesting experience in and of itself if you know how yo deal with other human beings.

It's when you end up staying in groups who tolerate that guys for a long time that it truly becomes an awful and frustrating experience.

Either way, you wont find the good players unless you risk potentially meeting the bad ones.
Fuck you, thats how it works in Tamriel
>Mixing cultures and races is fucking stupid if you're using humans.

Sounds like /pol/ would love to have you.
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going to be honest, I read that at first as you were crying afterwards. And why didn't you get with the hipster qt?
Trips have never bothered me, I don't even notice if people have names above their posts or not.

But I will never understand the disruption people need to cause to bitch and cry about trips. Honestly the disruption is being caused primarily by one side.
I don't notice trips most of the time too, but for other they may be quite noticeable by standing out from the uniform anons.

Similarly, when it's an anon being a faggot, it's dispersed into the nameless crowd (although sometimes still recognised due to constant similarities, it's rarer). When it's a trip or name, all that gets concentrated and remembered, attached to that trip. Thus, the strongest reaction.

Because some of them are fucking awful and all they do is shit up every thread they grace with their shitposting and shit opinions.
Depends on the system, Pathfinder gives perception checks for detecting scrying sensors. It doesn't stop you from being spied on, but it lets you know you're being watched somehow.
>claims to be anti-racist
>actually really, really racist and dismissive
>superiority complex
>wanted to play Dunmer

You should have let her. It might have been one of the most faithful depictions of the race.
Your post is shit.
This is bullshit.

It's not too much to ask people to show up once a while for a collaborative effort. If you play sports, join a frat, or even play fucking video games with friends, this is all expected. Have you heard people who play sports say they will miss half of the team's games because of other shit? No, they plan around it. Shit, I play EUIV with friends every week, and most people manage to show up every single time. These are people with jobs, exams, and all that other real life shit.

But in my RPG group, I've had players flake out because they wanted to see a football match. Or, the most recent one, where a player decided to go to the mall with his mom at the fucking moment the game started. All because of the attitude of "it's just some hobby".

No, you make an agreement with a bunch of other people, and if you don't keep yourself to it, you're letting everyone down. We've got people in our group who also have jobs, girlfriends, exams, and other serious shit, and they set aside a significant part of their weekend to do this stuff. That's why people who flake out are the worst: They take other people's time and effort for granted.

And it doubly sucks if you're DMing, or maybe just even really invested in the campaign, because other players randomly dropping out is hell for internal consistency. "Hey, remember when we beat that bandit chief and found the golden necklace? No? Oh, right, you weren't there".

The thing is, people are creatures of habit. So if you once assume the notion of "it's just a hobby" and don't make a big deal out of people not showing up, they'll assume the same goes every single time. Those examples I mentioned? It's peer pressure that keeps people in. Flake out on sports games, and you WILL become the punching bag of your team. People will call you to ask where you are, people will remind you of your bullshit, people will remind you of the importance of being there.
Wait, where the fuck did Bob come from? Is he Sam?

If you are socially inept usually its best not to try to shoehorn your character in as the party leader.

Either way asking to be 3 levels ahead/homebrew clearly shows what kind of person this was.
Bread knives are the nastiest weapons in the game, m8. Never get close to a good archer.
What does having a gimped character have to do with needing x XP?

Was he going to use the xp to craft some broken magic item that turns him into a Dr Jekyll and Mr Jackass type character?

When we play, xp is so arbitrary. I usually just let the players level up every few sessions or after a particularly dense challenge.
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Sure, allow me to show you my most recent, terrible experience
Magic items have experience point costs as well as material and gold costs. Were you flatlining your progression while everyone around you levelled up?

What's wrong with gnome bards?

>pulling out a knife, a shit one at that

Come on, faggot, man up. Assuming that this was true, you should accept the consequences of your actions.
>Sign up for a game of pathfinder in my neighborhood
>Tell the group I'm going to be making a bard
>Everyone thinks bards are ass, tells me that if I'm dead weight they'll make me roll a new character
>Make a min/max 18 dex archer bard
>End up being pretty good in combat, especially with the buffs I cast on myself and my comrades
>No slacker in social situations either
>People call me out on being a min/maxing piece of shit
>After telling me that I need to be good at combat or they'll kill off my character
>Lots of passive aggressive jabs at me IC and OOC as we go on, multi-class as an arcane archer and end up controlling the battlefield
>Most of the group dislikes me, even though I'm not a dick IC or OOC. Thankfully friendly with the GM
>IC jabs are typically about random flaws in my character, like my low WIS apparently gives them an excuse to treat my character like he's mentally retarded
>Regularly threaten my character with violence
>Their excuse is that their characters don't like gnomes.
>OOC jabs such as complaining when I buy them snacks and drinks from the dollar store, saying that I like my food cheap just like my characters
>FYI, a 3-liter bottle of orange soda from the dollar tree tastes exactly the same as a 2 liter bottle that costs three times as much. Shut the fuck up Robert.

Am I a That Guy or do I deserve the ire of my other players for min/maxing?
In the system it only took gold to make magic items
It actually helped with progression of the party because it make the other players hit better and harder
Sounds like they're a shit group.
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Fat that guy detected.
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What made him a /pol/tard? Or were you just struggling to give this character negative qualities that aren't just "gets mad at video games"?
Sometimes you are going to offend someone without having any idea how or why and no explanation will be offered.

You apologize and move on with your life. Anything else and you're submitting to emotional terrorism.

>OOC jabs such as complaining when I buy them snacks and drinks from the dollar store, saying that I like my food cheap just like my characters

>Am I a That Guy?

No, fuck that group, they don't deserve you.
When do Dunmer claim to be anti-racist?
Those guys sound like gigantic pricks, I don't know why you haven't quit yet.
I was shocked to discover virt is not currently banned.

Also, never 2 l8 2 denigr8 virt m8
>Be me, playing unhallowed metropolis
>Group consists of a detective, a doctor, an undertaker and 'I'm totally a professional undead hunter' edgelord albino undertaker.
>Everybody uses guns
>Except edgelord
>Edgelord's weapon of choice against zombies are dual swords
>Edgelord tries to be group leader based on IC experience. Character is in his 20s, and trying to stab zombies to death with a knife.
>Never kills a zombie for the entire campaign
>Treats every NPC THE WORST
>We try not to let him talk for the group, he ends up 'getting bored' and throwing knives at our contact for lulz.
>Also insults various nobles
>Keeps sneaking off alone to "ninja zombies"
>We keep having to bust him out.
>Save him from a vampire he tried to solo, too.
>He gets mad we "did it wrong"
>Apparently using a flamethrower on a vampire is "doing it wrong".
>Edgelord keeps trying to loot solo, too, so he doesn't have to share.
>The rest of us are, slowly, getting fed up with his shit
>Get job to kidnap a noble
>He gets increasingly OOC about things, to the point I open my skype to find a 2 hour long melt down on why we should do things exactly as he has planned an no other way
>Suggest getting some spare uniforms and just walking in dressed as the guy's own guard unit and luring him out on a pretense.
>He gets REALLY MAD we're not doing a commando operation on a brothel and bluffing our way in instead
>Noble has german mercs who don't speak any english. Even better, let our german doctor talk, right?
>Nope, Edgelord talks, in perfect english
>Noble smells a rat, but given the gravity of our lie, goes with us anyway
>Lure him to a boat, prep sedatives to safely secure him
>Edgelord hits him on the head with a crowbar
>DM says "Roll damage"
>Not quite down, edgelord hits him again
>Noble is now comatose. MFW mission failure because we needed the guy for interrogation and, without the proof he could provide, are now criminals.
Yeah I had a dm doing shit like that
>Admits to shaving off damage I do
>Nerfs my class abilities
>Bitches about my pc but gets passive aggressive when I offer to rebuild it
>Bitches about me doing too much damage well other people do more damage then me
>Tries to get other players to laugh with him when he intentionally changes shit or fucks me over (Never works because the other players arnt fuck wits)
>Alters the hp of creatures to screw me
>Forces other people to get kills because he thinks it is appropriate
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>Remember the guy he chucked knives at for luls? Yeah, that was the guy sending us on this job. He decided to rat us out to the cops.
>Only seconds before they get to the building
>Edgelord panics, jumps back into the boat and tries to run away
>Rest of party follows
>Toss my guns in the water instead and break my own nose
>Lay down on the dock and thank the cops for saving me in broken english when they get there
>Point at the boat and shout "Lord! Save!"
>Cops hunt rest of party.
>Rest of party gets the hint, also dumps weapons and pretends to be kidnapped
>Edgelord is too slow. He's the sole identifiable culprit.
>Doctor speaks perfect german, does most of the talking, gets us out of it
>Well, most of us. Someone had to bite the bullet for high treason of assaulting nobility
>May as well be the guy who spoke perfect english in front of witnesses while disguised as a german merc
>Edgelord gets convicted and hung
>Rest of party give written statements to the crown in German, written by our party's actual German, with identical stories.

>Cue OOC meltdown
>Guy flips out for half an hour
>Leaves in a rage, because we 'betrayed him'
>We kind of get the feeling he got way, way too into his character...
I was gonna ask why you didn't kill the fuck.

That's why. 10/10
I was tempted, but it would have been OOC for my character up to the point it was him or us. My undertaker was conceptually a solid team player, both by profession (if you hunt zombies for a living and can't play with others, you usually get, y'know, dead) and because I wanted the game to be good and last a while.

But with that snafu, yeah, someone had to die. We decided it was to be the guy who got us into it, instead of everyone.
Had my merc fighter turned into a little STR 8 girl for no other reason than the GM goes full lolrandumb when he drinks. He moved away after that so I never got to play in a decent game with him or even talk to him about it, and I hope that's the reason I'm still so salty about something that happened fucking years ago.

I'm usually pretty invested in my characters as well but when you fuck up to that extent you need to face what's due.

Solid read. Trips confirm.
Thanks, anon. Happy to provide.
Complete confusion

Lurk moar and knowyourmemes
If any of this is true, you knew exactly what you were doing. You knew you were flirting with her, you knew you weren't going to teach her any dm skills, and you know this whole thing is made up.
Actually, in an old thread, Moot answered those cries of despair to tell people there wasn't more traffic in summer in particular. People just replace "cancer" by "summerfag" when the time of the year comes. It's like 4chan is on its periods for a whole season.

Seriously, my first thought after he got punched was

"So then you got up and said "Yeah, man, you're right, I deserved that".

But nope, faggot pulled out a boxcutter.
>P-pol go away
Christ you're pathetic.
The story is just a train wreck.
>one player
>other player
>seconds other player

Probably the worst green text I've seen this side of /b/. Incomprehensible
If you have to ask, you aren't That Guy.
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Not mine, but one that I found rather funny.
Guys, I think I might be the group's That Guy
>Very loud
>Overly dramatic
>trying to rush the group when they're having fun
>take my time when I have fun
>contradictory at many points
>drab characters that only serve as mouth boxes for my 'cuhrayzee' voices

How do I fix this? Where do I start?

Stop focusing on doing crazy shit, or what you specifically consider fun, and instead focus on interacting with your fellow players.

That's the first step.
That sounds pretty terrible.
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Crap, yeah, Bob = Sam. I'm a lazy proofreader.

It's approaching that level. The guy has been reminded to use skills, ask for GM clarification and help, or to not be rude and competitive with other players. It's going to likely blow up soon. I probably won't bring popcorn.
>implying being a /pol/tard is a negative quality
Fuck off Jude
Repeat after me: "We would like that you don't come to our next session, that guy - you have a horrible attitude that's ruining the game and we came to the conclusion that we don't want to play with you anymore." Say it to him with a straight face and firmly. It's a magic spell to fix your games.

Ok so one time I was That Girl.

>be new to rping, only played one game before, but then moved away from group
>find game on Roll20
>great gm, and most of the players are ok
>have lots of fun
>have trouble not bringing up my ideas about feminism in and out of game
>sometimes get into stupid arguments with other players
>not 100% my fault, but a lot of it was
>made one sided and exaggerated story about group in That Guy thread
>didn't even really mean to hate on group, just wanted to join in telling funny stories on /tg/
>member of group who browses /tg/ saw and now they hate me

Pretty much I was really immature and lost a good gaming group. I mentioned this once or twice before on /tg/ before and I always hope somebody from group will see it and they'll at least know I'm sorry even though we'll probably never play together again;_;
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>>have trouble not bringing up my ideas about feminism in and out of game
>third wave modern feminism

at least you dropped that flaming ball of tar right?
This is why you wait until campaigns are over and groups have gone their seperate ways before storytime...

Got a link or cap of the story that they found?

We all evolve as players. At least you've learned from your mistakes.

Maybe you can redeem yourself some what by posting the unbiased storytime.
Is this the gaming Beatles?
>replying to 0/10 "I',m a gurl" bait
And now we have 4 more that guys in the thread.
>guy is literally 400 pounds
>like we have trouble finding a spot for him at the table
Annoying but meh

>keeps coughing violently and clearing his throat, which he spits out into a plastic bottle

>guy insists he plays his homebrew race/class
If he -insists- then that's a pretty big red flag. If he merely 'really wants to' then it's a smaller red flag
>some fetish ridden orc woman
Bigger red flag

>asks to start 3 levels ehad for plot reasons
Again, big red flag
>dm says no and after about an hour we start
>after an hour
This implies he argued about it for an hour

>guy attemps to take over the grouop using the charisma both he and his character obviously lack
Another red flag, by this point I would have decided not to allow him to come back

>guy gets upset and tries to storm out after throwing everything on the table over my head and mostly into the trash can
That's just rude

>later hear him screaming at us from the street
I would seriously consider calling the cops

>implying I care

I just want more storytimes. You're the one caught up, anon.
>I was just pretending to be "that guy"
Sure, Anon, sure.
>>Archers with knives are the deadliest fucking thing in the game
that double backstab damage

I found it. Guess it was magical realm thread, not that guy thread. And despite what people in the thread said, none of that was total lies. But it was put very negatively and I didn't include all the things I did to annoy the gm, just what he and the rest of the group did. It just got worse when people attacked me in the thread and I got defensive. Group was actually really great as long as we didn't talk politics, but then I was stupid and was one that bought it up most of the time.


Yeah, I learned a lot, but I wish I could take it back. I think you can pretty much get the idea from the bad version of the story. Maybe I'll rewrite it sometime, but I don't think today.
Not really that guy but I got really salty about it
>Take over campaign from other GM who just wants to play
>Running my game, trying to keep it fun and plenty of hijinks caused by players bravely ignoring plothooks and forcibly taking ownership of inns.
>One player drops after her surgery
>Two more are going to drop off in july and august because of sports and events.
>The usual forever gm wants to run some hideous abortion of d20 modern and 5e with saves taken out
>Ok, going to wrap game up, make two last sessions they can do a boss run and beat the big bad
>Even do some stuff in case they want to pick it up again
>Day before first GM of the current game (not forever GM) posts on facebook that he wants to start the new game the session after this one. Oh, and he won't be there for the last session
>Fuck it, agree because I don't fucking need drama now
>Last session only three people are present and I repurpose the stats of another boss for the BBEG and give him a crazy warlock companion
>Say the character of the first gm wasn't present because he got dragged off by an amorous owlbear in the middle of the night.
>Gave everyone the option to go save him, but they declined.
After they killed the boss, I gave an epilogue about what happened to them, with the fighter cleric going back to the northern continent, killing everything in his path, to rule his people. The Halfling assassin eventually got shanked by one of the assassins drawn to his evil sword and the elf ranger fucked off into the woods with wolves, hundreds of years later wandering the wastelands left after the fighter cleric decided to go south again with her undead dire wolf, killing anyone she saw.


Forgot link.
I was thinking the same thing, for a moment. Then I remembered some of the ridiculous crap he tried to convince us were reasonable posts and I changed my mind.

Usually there's no reason to include that information on an anonymous board but it was clearly important to the story.

You're knee jerk reaction isn't doing yourself any favors here, faggot.

Did I ask if they were from London? Fuck off.
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kindof related
>that guy goes full damage control
Guess I could post this in the next "that guy" thread.
That's not what "That Guy" means in /tg/ parlance, anon. Please lurk more and familiarize yourself with our terminology.

Enjoy the rest of your summer.
>come to neo-/tg/ after years
>is still shit
>make fun of "that guys"
>that guy calls me newfag
Comedy gold.
You sound like a bratty queer.
I'm sorry...
You are That Guy.
Kek, the people arguing with you in that thread sound like 30 year old virginal manchildren. It's okay to play an attractive character. If some greaseneck thinks their muscular barbarian or rugged ranger isn't attractive, show them some gay porn.
>Be new to RP's
>Get invited by friends to try out an RP
>one guy couldn't show up so they toss me his character sheet and explain the basics it's a supernatural based RP.
>Try my best but suck hard best thing I did was save the guys character from a fire while dragging out vital documents.
>Game ends guys say it'll take me a while but I did ok.
>we all agree that i'll join in the next RP since they were in the middle of one.

Three weeks later

>friend tells me their planing to do a firefly type RP
>sounds fun say i'm in if they need me.
>meet up with friends at bar that hosts games
>Roll up or characters for next time
>have to leave before I get a chance to do mine
>ask friend I trust to sort my sheet so we can start next time.

2 days later

>I get a text saying my sheets all sorted
>I'm the pilot, explains he and dm gave me perks to aid in areas like perception and coordination for flying, good with bartering high int and speed, mid strength low health and constitution.
>next time I go to play he drops the bomb
>for shits and giggles him and DM decided to make my character Female and australian, DM says I have to put on an aussie accent (theres also an aussie in our group playing the engineer) and the DM would reward me if I could keep the accent up.

Fast forward about 5 games

>My character aptly named Shiela Chazwooza has been captured by space pirates.
>Pirate captain is interrogating me (getting a little hands on touchy feely)
>All in good fun but dm talks to me ooc since i've been hitting low rolls for the entire interrogation.
>Tells me that this could end up killing my character unless I can get a high roll or come up with a way to escape.
>next roll hits a 5, everyone is trying to find a way we can save my character.
>slap my hand on the table and begin laughing tell them I had one thing I thought of but didn't want to use
>everyone looks at me and dm says go on.

>Every character is naked



Nigga, none of those were practical.

There's being a free spirit and then there's walking through the desert without wearing any protection at all.

Past anons were tame with their criticism.

This was a mistake, knee jerk-anon was right
> physically assault someone for playing by the rules and winning
I hate pay to play, too, but you're a cunt.

He does have a point though.

Why even bother having "advancements" when your primary stat reaches +3?
Women generally like playing attractive characters. The way to get them to tone it down isn't going for the confrontation, it's the same way you get your wife to stop nagging you.

Ignore it.

>Begin flirting with pirate captain as best as my fake aussie accent can manage.
>aussie friend in fits of laughter due to shitty accent
>DM rolls for the captain and says my flirting works he's within kissing distance
>announce it's time for the Chazwooza special
>everyone looks confused
>begin leaning in close to dm (time for my best RP and gay chicken)
>almost within kissing distance of dm everyone is silent
>DM ic and ooc asks me what i'm doing
>ic in my aussie accent tell him it's called the chazwooza special and slam my knee into the captains groin with all my strength backed by my first high roll
>also slammed my knee into the dm's seat he jumped friends jumped, I jumped
>everyone burst out laughing dm rolls and tells me my surprise worked and the captain was OHKO
>dm decides to pull a fast one has captains crew come in
>they see captain on floor
>pull out some half hearted threatening speech
>I become new captain
>other friend flips his shit says that knocks over our drinks and says the game is fucking stupid now.
>WTF where did this come from
>he walks dm ends session friends explain that he was the guy whos character I had played as, they told me they enjoyed the way I played the character better than him.
>later find out that because all the turnarounds I had managed in the firefly rp he got pissy and had enough.
>he decides he's not gaming with us again, I offer to drop out since he was with the group first
>he tells me to fuck off and ends up using his last game to try and get us into a deathtrap by locking flight controls so we crash into asteroid
>everyone is a bit annoyed but dm said it seemed like a good problem for us to overcome
>we have a ooc other guy has walked out for good, we heading towards an asteroid with no control.
>decide fuck it I smash the navigation computer with my boot and detonate the weapons on one side of my ship
>ship spins out of control but away from asteroid
>ships on -2hp breaches everywhere running out of air
>we fucked
>dm takes pity on us
>we crash into some mining station
>do untold amounts of damage our ships fucked but we're all alive
>DM decides this station is owned by some space mafia type guys who we now ended up owing big time.
man, I'm glad the girl in my group isn't like this

>First game
>brand new to RP
>only knows the DM from work
>makes a half orc ranger with 5 charisma
>he waxes all his body hair because he thinks it makes him look good
>wears nothing but skulls
>skull cod piece
>skull nipple covers
>skull everything
>rapes someone in every town we go to
>ends up trying to get her animal companion to rape one of the other players
>almost succeeds, he ended up getting free and killing it
>swears revenge on him

She ended up getting killed some time later by a paladin
She also got the player who she tried to rape with her wolf to draw her a picture of her character smiling like a pervert while touching his bird skull nipper covers... she framed it and its now hanging above her bed
What cracks me up about this is how you think that she doesn't think that's attractive.

Sounds like a fun game. Great roleplaying. What's with Firefly and female australians?

Another quality storytime ending with trips.

Got anymore?

I think some people in the thread were way to hostile, but I wasn't being fair to the group and acted immature too.


I just wanted to rp a sexy character...
>I just wanted to rp a sexy character...
Almost every girl does at least occassionally, because it's a female power fantasy. It has nothing to do with being a "slut" and everything to do with wanting to be in charge of something you consciously or unconsciously consider 'badass'. Skinny, pimply nerds play Ahnulds and other male power fantasies for the same reason. Women get their badass fix by being sexy.

The only thing you did wrong from that account alone is bring politics into the game and overdo it a bit. The guy equivalent is that one story about an orc who solves everything by intimidation, including carpentry. Doesn't mean you can't play something 'sexy', but you might find going for elegance comes across better than being vulgar.

I mean, we'd literally just laugh and be like "She has her tits out? Really. Hahahaha" and then ignore it. But some folks have a lot thinner skin...

You can be attractive without being completely naked.

This isn't even a gender issue.

If a male character had been running through the Forrest without any clothes I'd have made him roll to see if he had poison ivy on his dong.

If Conan had been trekking through the desert without being sun smart, I would have made him suffer heat stroke.

There is nothing wrong with playing attractive characters, just show some common sense about it.
>getting upset at some one saying something is gay

Oh no! The horrors!
I agree that it's not a gender issue. I'm just explaining "most people don't want to play fugly shit" in terms she's already using and has brought up. That usually gets the point across better. That said, I like emphasising practicality over 80s album covers in my games as well, so I'd handle Conan Clone Five Million about the same as you, anon.
Sounds like an actual autistic kid who was told by someone that doing these edgy characters is cool.
This. Too many people are trying way too hard to be cool and normal by acting like RPGs are the least important thing in the world.

I tried explaining that to people who were hating on SoB power armor design, but I don't think anybody took me seriously. if I'm rping int pretend fantasyland then I might as well be sexy while doing it.


I know. I just didn't want my characters to just have high charisma or just have note on character sheet that they're attractive. I wanted to emphasize it somehow.
Hey hey hey! Balding is not a neckbeard sign. Been balding since I was 15 before I got fat and started to be interested in fantasy stuff

But not doing anything about it is.

Just shave your head, mate. Look after your appearance. If you don't respect yourself, nobody else is going to.
>be me
>roll up a character I like but with some natural flaws for his race
>roll up to the party announce who I am and that I suffer from racial condition
>party laughs me out of the house
Well sure. That I can agree on. Been shaving this head for years now.
No, anon, you are the idiot.
Unless perhaps you are from a country where "shit" is not considered cussing.

It's inappropriate to openly cuss at a game being run in a public gaming store.
Especially so if you are playing with those you just met.
Using gay derogatorily is inappropriate too, just not as universally as cussing.
>implying not doing max damage on a crit isn't some gay shit
>thinks 4rry is an insult and 4rries have a specific attitude
God I wish I could block you on this piece of shit tablet
>>40802238 why was the first thought that came to me - I'm Jamal and I can't swim.
God I'm glad my FLGS doesn't give a shit about something as pathetic as some guy "saying a baaaad word omg!".
Don't say it in front of the Pokemon/Yugioh kids and nobody cares. This FLGS is based.

It's not about whether the place gives a shit, it's about common courtesy, you whiny baby.
>shit talk my FLGS owner about his ideas to implement MTG into the weekly rotation.
>tell him this is a bad idea that mtg players give a bad stigma to the store
>implying the guys who get mad over the odd "fuck" or "shit" aren't the whiny bitches
max kek
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>Playing with group of friends I'd been playing with since high school
>2 gay guys in our group, have been pretty good friends or so I thought
>get into some gay drama over some he's dating someone I used to date shit
>one day one of the gay guys' character pushes the other's off a cliff
>the guy's character dies, he storms off and drives away from the session
>we tell the one who pushed the other's character off to not come back
>we convince the guy who lost his character to come back and change the direction of the campaign to bringing him back to life

Gay drama, not even once
Sometimes people can't handle that their micro sd doesn't compare to a 1Tb SSD.

Have tons of these stories about Dota but those are for d2g

>Unless perhaps you are from a country where "shit" is not considered cussing.

Possibly Australia but you're right that it is common courtesy.


Part of going outside is acting civilised, anon. Amongst friends is another thing entirely.


I don't play but I'd have to be blind to not see that MTG provides a steady income to most stores.

Do you not want yours to succeed?
The thing is, is that he just needs the store to break even. He's throwing MTG in there for the "community." He has a job already which makes a fuck ton of money and just wants the city to have a chill place to game.
>implying you can't both be civilised and have a little swear-swear

Relationship drama in general's bad. Had a decent player back out because his bf keeps him whipped as hell. Damn shame
Still not sure if the first guy is an idiot, but you certainly are.
Telling someone that they need to change their language to respect common courtesy does not mean they are "getting mad" or being "whiny bitches."
They are being respectful and courteous, which is how people are supposed to act when in public.

I realize that might be an alien concept for you so I'll make it simple:
If you wouldn't do something in front of your grandparents, a small child, or a police officer, you generally shouldn't do it in public.

If you don't care about this, and choose to act disrespectful and discourteously, that is your choice.
But don't shit on a cupcake and expect the world to treat it like frosting.
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>I know that flustered halfling
>implying I don't swear around my grandparents
Look, man, I'm not saying you should go full Malcolm Tucker. I'm just saying soiling yourself in outrage because a guy referred to something as "some gay shit" is a hilarious overreaction.

also you're taking virtualoptim's side here and that automatically makes you a cockgargling faggot

Mine doesn't do it on purpose. I'm not even meaty like our barbarian, but...

> need to go into a decaying forest called the Gnarlwood and undo whatever is causing these undead to rise at the heart of this glade so the druid queen will speak to us.
> a member of some elven rangers who are stationed there called the Autumn Guard take us to the edge of the quarantine.
> somehow we survive the volley relatively unscathed so our hunter puts up Fickle Winds.
> murdering undead left and right, all is good.
> spook comes out of the wall and I get dispelled so my fickle winds drop.
> suddenly I'm a big, angry pincushion
> two crits.
> ohgodmyanus.scroll

This isn't uncommon. My character gets a lot of attention because I'm a meat grinder with legs. In a given fight my health bar is doing pushups from nearly dying and then having someone cure severe me.

Another instance, same character...
> pirates happen, they're boarding the ship
> they have squallshapers that are making localized rough water so our ship deck is tossing us around.
> fail reflex and fall prone
> flanked by two pirates with levels in rogue
> sneak attack damage has my ass pinching the seat
> crawling provokes, standing provokes
> soak the -4 and cleave them both off at the shins
> stand up
> get shot by dickass crossbows
> top of the round
> hellofloorhowareyou.elixir
> zapped with lightning by their casters, and another rogue pirate stabs me in the ass
I only asked him to watch his language because my boyfriend is gay and it offended him.
>not understanding women this hard
kill urself my man
>tripfag cucks some innocent dude
Business as usual for you cockgobblers I guess.
Then he should grow a backbone, I like dudes and don't give a damn if you refer to things as "gay shit", "absolute faggotry" or whatever.
besides, then I can make jokes about showing them "absolute faggotry" later
Yah, Art by Incase.
And I'm just saying that thinking that telling someone to change their language is "soiling yourself in outrage" and a "hilarious overreaction" make you an idiot.

And if virtualoptim said water was wet, I would take his side.

Fun Fact: approximately 8% of virtualoptim's posts aren't caustic shitposting and I have been professionally trained to encourage people with special needs to improve their problem behavior.
Even if, through our combined efforts, he only improves to being a caustic shitposter 91% of the time, then we will have accomplished a miracle.

>tripfag is wrong so I must be right

No, you're both faggots who are both on either side of the extreme.



You sound like a child. Let it go and move on.
>going through all that effort for the worst shitposter on /tg/
>trained tardwrangler
Why don't you go and try helping someone who isn't a lost cause? Or better yet, go get wasted, have a laugh and try to remove that stick up your arse?
I know. I've been reading Alfie since the beginning. Shit's getting emotional for a comic about fantasy fucking.
>You sound like a child
It's called intentional mockery

>helping those with special needs is a lost cause

Now I know you're not fit to be a part of society. This is the last reply you'll get from me.
>being this much of a bleeding heart
>on 4chan
Don't you stock WOC at Game Goblins?
No wonder you don't like tard wranglers, yours would probably yell at you if he knew you were shitposting this late.
> Playing D&D with friends
> Low challenge, basically just a goof off campaign for us to play while DM makes his "big one".
> Have in the party, Me playing a basic fighter, a ranger, a wizard, and a thief. We will call the thief Pete.
> We begin playing and everyone is having fun, talking with the other party members and getting names and backstories out of the way, except for Pete.
> Pete is CONSTANTLY asking the party if we could just get to the mission and fight people.
> 10 minutes later we are traveling through some woods and get jumped by bandits and everyone roles initiative, except Pete who jumps into some bushes.
> Ranger goes first and crit kills a bandit archer.
> Immediately Pete yells "I sneak over and loot the body!"
> wat
> I ask the Dm if any of us can see him doing this. I had not realised my mistake.
> Pete proceedes to derail the entire campaign for 3 hours. THREE. HOURS. Doing nothing but complaining about this.
> We tried just letting it go after the 10 minute mark, but he didn't, he just kept screaming about this and that how we were bad players and the DM was a bad DM.
> Finally we get back to the game, most of us just so done with it we are going to quit after this fight. We all roll our attacks and we get to round 2.
> Pete's turn comes up and he yells, (He does not talk by the way, he only yells) "I Shoot the Fighter with my crossbow!"
> wat again
> DM asks why Pete wants to attack the fighter. "Because my elf suddenly doesn't like the look of him! I'm Chaotic Neutral so it's within my alignment!"
> Wat again, again
> Dm says he can't do that
> God Emperor help us.JPG
Whoever said I hated them? Just think this one should be focusing his efforts on nonverbal autism kids or something instead of some internet shitposter
> More yelling, More Screaming, "HOW AM I THE ONLY GOOD PLAYER HERE!?" "MY ALIGNMENT SAYS!" "YOU ARE RAILROADING MY CHARACTER!" Thankfully for only 30 minutes this time.
> the wizard has left the table by this point, proving once and for all that he was the smartest man there.
> Eventually we slay all of the bandits and return to town for the reward.
> The thief sprints down the road towards the town hall. We immediately realise what he's doing.
> Ranger asks if he can shoot thief. "YOU CAN'T DO THAT! YOU'RE NEUTRAL GOOD! YOU WOULDN'T SHOOT AN INNOCENT MAN IN THE BACK!" blah blah blah.
> he has some enchanted slippers or something and runs way faster than us to the town hall and collects the reward before we arrive.
> He gives us like 30% of what we were owed.
> Me and the ranger both stood up and quit at this point.
> like 3 days later the Dm calls me and tells us that he talked with Pete and he won't do it again.
> I didn't believe him.
>implying only the battles that can be won are worth fighting
I stand with my back against the river and fight idiocy and rudeness on the internet.

Also, my ass remains stick free. I just enjoy fighting for Respect as a concept.

Also, this was not me:
Technically, he was saying helping this specific poster is a lost cause, (which may be true) not those with special needs in general.

Yeah, I've realised my mistake. Carry on shitposting, I concede.
First question.
Was he over twelve years old?
yes, he was 25. 25 and actually has a job. I have had a morbid curiosity on how he acts at said job for years now.
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.How about a >That GM?

>Playing the Grimderp future of Only War.
>Brawl happening in the trenches.
>Priest say's "I'm going to charge the enemy soldier"
>"Well, you'll need to roll an awareness test to hit the right target"
>Wtf this has never been a thing before
>Priest say's he'd like to only charge if he can identify a target for certain.
>"You've already said you're charging, roll."
>cool cool
>Fails awareness test, 1 degree.
>Spends fate point, fails 1 degree again.
>"I'm going to roll to see who you've hit, even a friendly, odd an enemy"
>Rolls a 6
>"You've just attacked a friendly solider, Let me roll for his rank, the higher number the higher the rank"
>Rolls d10, gets 10.
>"You've attacked an Lt, I'll roll your damage"
>Rolls max damage.
>Priest want's to spend a fate point to re-roll damage
>"I'm not allowing you to re-roll for lower damage" cool rules bro.
>Describes priest in murderous lust sawing a Lt in half
>Our Lt comes round the corner.
>"Sorry Priest but I've got to" he says with a shit eating grin.
>GM looks to me, "Commissar Anon, execute this man"

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>Well fuck, in character I would, but I don't want to and the GM is really forcing him to die here with no way out...
>All this during a melee in a trench.
>Still at least 4 hours of session, don't want to leave priest doing nothing for at least this session
"Matters of discipline within the ecclesiarchy are best to be sorted from within, IF he survives this battle."
>GM looks mad I didn't execute.
>"Commissar execute that man that is an order"
>lolno, Commissars outside this chain of command.
>GM has his Lt raised gun and shoot at me since I'm between priest and Lt.
>Other players getting mad that nothing is happening because GM has hard on for killing priest.
>Techpriest suggets a hailmary with demo charges, charging the enemy line and taking as many as possible with him.
>Priest accepts because we can all already tell the GM wont allow him to survives.
>GM - "fine then, get him strapped up!"
>Priest climbs out of trench and begins to charge enemy lines.
>A PC is holding the detonator so we can at least give him a good send off.
>"Pass me that"
>The Lt takes the detonator and blows up the priest in no mans land before he even reaches the enemy line
>"Had to be sure"
>Priest had to sit for 3 hours and do nothing
>GM just laughs and tells PC that he shouldn't have charged in when he wasn't given a choice
>We all tried to get him "out of it" and argue the way the GM had done it.
>My character got "Disciplined" for not obeying an order.

And that kids is how to GM like an asshole.

Please tell me that you never played with that cunt again.
So the problem is that he didn't enjoy the game and that offends you.
He's our regular GM, he's "Normally" pretty good, although recently I think he want's someone else to GM because he keeps pulling out douche moves such as above (That was one of many things).
He could tell us if he wanted one of us to run something instead of being a dick though.
Your boyfriend is the kind of person us homosexuals refer to as a "faggot" then. Thinskinned little momma's boys who overreact about every little slur do more damage to how society sees, and treats, gays than the under one percent of retards who genuinely hate gays.
Just have him stop gming if he's going to be a huge faggot about it. It's better not to play at all than put up with that sort of bullshit.

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