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You shake your head side to side, carefully trying to clear the feeling that you've been staring out into a field of wheat for months.
You're also trying not to dislodge Ezzy, who has decided that your head is the most secure place in terms of weasel-defense.

You were doing something, right?
The thing. Yes.
The thing with the delving and the killing and the hopefully eating.
Diving?

Dungeons!

It was dungeons. You are doing dungeoning. Exploring.
You glance surreptitiously around you.

Safe. You forgot the word, but not out loud. Noone will know.

Your friends are, however, all sitting and staring at you, waiting for you to make a decision. Or move.
So there is that.

>Review your strategy. And also everything else you've potentially forgotten.
>Thinking is complicated. There's a gate over there, isn't there?
>Whistle a merry tune as you punt weasels. That isn't even a euphemism.
>Other (?)
>>
>>44570303

Good evening. Long time no see.
I'll do my best to answer any questions anyone has as I write.


Announcements: twitter.com/REQMX

Q&A: ask.fm/REQM

Character Sheet and Misc:
http://pastebin.com/u/REQM

Archive:
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Re-Monster
or
http://archive.moe/tg/search/tripcode/!!7fb3j+Ac+pZ%20/type/op/
or
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1rD-MZe51wYI63xxl-tG8dsxj-RWVtJu3S6Gzd6OTJSw/edit?usp=sharing

Currently trying to find an alternative to the gdoc, as it crashes my browser when I attempt to add chapters.
>>
>>44570303
>Whistle a merry tune as you punt weasels. That isn't even a euphemism.
>>
>Whistle a merry tune as you punt weasels. That isn't even a euphemism.
>>
>Whistle a merry tune as you punt weasels. That isn't even a euphemism.
YESH, it's back!
>>
>>44570303
>Review your strategy. And also everything else you've potentially forgotten.
Holy shit it's finally back
>>
>>44570303
>>Whistle a merry tune as you punt weasels. That isn't even a euphemism.
THE QUEEN HAS RETURNED!
>>
>>44570303
>>Review your strategy. And also everything else you've potentially forgotten.
SPIDERS!! We all missed you REQM.
>>
>>44570303
>>Whistle a merry tune as you punt weasels. That isn't even a euphemism.

I'm fucking crying right now, between this and lizards yesterday I'm so happy
>>
>>44570303
>Whistle a merry tune as you punt weasels. That isn't even a euphemism.

Make sure snek has plenty of time to work out.
>>
>>44570303
>Review your strategy. And also everything else you've potentially forgotten.
>Whistle a merry tune as you punt weasels. That isn't even a euphemism.
I'm near tears of happiness this isn't dead, welcome back REQM.
>>
>>44570303
>Whistle a merry tune as you punt weasels. That isn't even a euphemism.
Can't we involve Esmerelda in this? They're small enough, right?
>>
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>>44570303
>>Review your strategy. And also everything else you've potentially forgotten.
YEAH, SPIDERS BACK BITCHES
>>
>>44570303
>Whistle a merry tune as you punt weasels. That isn't even a euphemism.
Welcome back REQM, I really missed the adventures of the "Not-A-Queen" and her friends.

God, I really missed Nin
>>
>>44570303
Spiders are back! Hell yes!

>Whistle a merry tune as you punt weasels. That isn't even a euphemism.

Celebrating with weasel stomping day.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k76IGLi6jWI
>>
>>44570303
>>Whistle a merry tune as you punt weasels. That isn't even a euphemism.

And good night!
>>
>>44570303
>>Review your strategy. And also everything else you've potentially forgotten.
>>
>>44570303
>>Whistle a merry tune as you punt weasels. That isn't even a euphemism.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k76IGLi6jWI
>>
>>44570303
>Review your strategy. And also everything else you've potentially forgotten.
>Whistle a merry tune as you punt weasels. That isn't even a euphemism.

It's so good to be a giant spider again!
>>
Operation weasel field goal is go.

Writing!

>>44570382
>>44570385
>>44570409
>>44570410
>>44570412
>>44570435
>>44570481
>>44570533
>>44570534
Thanks, all. It's good to be writing again.

>>44570558
Night!

>>44570475
Weasels and snakes don't mix well.
>>
Hey wait wasn't there an anon with Shezska art?
>>
>>44570596
Or I could stay awake through the night and be a useless shit at work.

I'm being fired anyway, so what are they going to do? Fire me?
>>
>>44570533
I too missed Miss Monarchist, and her earth-shattering crush.
>>
>>44570596
Hey

wb
>>
Rolled 39 (1d100)

Just doing a test roll. This is my first time catching a thread. I've spent the last month or two on and off reading the archive. So, yeah, kinda excited for this.
>>
>>44571040
Thanks man, you too.
>>
>>44570303
I have a massive boner now. Thanks REQM!
>>
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Would'a been here earlier, but literally within two minutes of you starting my internet died.

In any case, SHITSCRIBBLE AHOY!
>>
HAHAHA! TIME FOR SPIDERS!
>>
You start down, into the soft flowing sea of grain. A chipper tune matches your stride as you make your way through the field, your legs keeping a beat.

And sometimes, you punctuate your song with the squeal of a weasel that has dared to cross you. And is now crossing the horizon.
They're rather impressively aerodynamic.

Oops.

Not that one, that one kinda tore in half.

"Lyra?"
"Yes?" You reply absent-mindedly, another rodent taking flight, marking the twelfth consecutive attempt of the newly formed Weasel Aerospace Development Co.

Nin follows up her question by clapping her hands over your cheeks, forcing the air from them.
And then she tries to turn your head to face her, and you oblige, as there is literally no chance in any cold hell of her actually physically forcing you to do anything, ever.

Maybe if she turns into something like a giant moth monster. Like the old movies?

You hope she doesn't turn into a giant moth monster.

"Wah?"
It's hard to enunciate with peopleholding your cheeks.
"What are you doing?"
"Withling?"
"What?"
"Whistling, yes?"

She regards you with the same sort of look you think people would give to a dog that's finally caught it's own tail.
"That wasn't whistling."
"...Some of it was whistling."
"Lyra."
"My fangs get in the way, yes."
"Hum instead, maybe?"
"My shell kind of thrums when I try."
"Then-"

Jin interrupts your slow dying dreams of being able to hold a tune with a chirp, and you both turn to face her.
"We're here, yes."

You glance forwards- and then upwards, following the grassy hillside to the gate at the top.
"Ah."

You flick a weasel away from your rear left leg, considering your options.

>Jin said there was something big behind the hill, right?
>If noone is going to stop you, you could just go right through? And there'll be bigger monsters. Edible ones.
>Is Sheszka even awake?
>Other (?)
>>
Curse you reqm,my first thread after 2 days of binge reading and you have to post when im bout to sleep D:
>>
>>44571086
Uh, be careful with that?

>>44571158
Thanks! Into the vault it goes!
>>
>>44571382
>If noone is going to stop you, you could just go right through? And there'll be bigger monsters. Edible ones.
>Is Sheszka even awake?
>>
>check wonder woof,then check hill
>>
>>44571382
>>Jin said there was something big behind the hill, right?
>>
>>44571382
>Jin said there was something big behind the hill, right?

>Is Sheszka even awake?
>>
>>44571382
>Jin said there was something big behind the hill, right?
If it's big, we can eat it right?

>>44571390
I know that feeling anon. Being a britfag is suffering when it comes to keeping up with some quests.
>>
>If noone is going to stop you, you could just go right through? And there'll be bigger monsters. Edible ones.
>Is Sheszka even awake?
>>
>>44571382
>Jin said there was something big behind the hill, right?
>Is Sheszka even awake?
>>
>>44571382
>Is Sheszka even awake?
>Jin said there was something big behind the hill, right?
>>
>>44571382
>>Jin said there was something big behind the hill, right?.
>>Is Sheszka even awake?
>>
>>44571382
>>Jin said there was something big behind the hill, right?
>>
>>44571382
>Jin said there was something big behind the hill, right?
>Is Sheszka even awake?
>>
>>44571382
>Jin said there was something big behind the hill, right?
>Is Sheszka even awake?
>>
>>44571382
>>If noone is going to stop you, you could just go right through? And there'll be bigger monsters. Edible ones.

Weasels aren't rodents, they're mustelids
>>
>>44571382
>>Is Sheszka even awake?
>Jin said there was something big behind the hill, right?
>>
>>44571382
>Jin said there was something big behind the hill, right?
>>
>>44571382
>If noone is going to stop you, you could just go right through? And there'll be bigger monsters. Edible ones.
>Is Sheszka even awake?
>>
Examine dog.
Examine Hill.

Writing!
>>
If Shezska ever gets hurt again I know what we must do.
>>
>>44571627
Combine [Dog] with [Hill].
>>
>>44571382
>If noone is going to stop you, you could just go right through? And there'll be bigger monsters. Edible ones.
>Is Sheszka even awake?
>>
>>44571683
You have gained (1)x Dogscape! Your cries for mercy go unheard!
>>
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>>44571957
...does that make shezka a terrain feature? Or would it be something more akin to this?

Also, whilst we're on the subject, do we actually have a size for shezka? As I seem to recall she's larger now. But still emulates a fluid when inhabiting our skull.
>>
>>44572117
I think she's been described as roughly bus-sized when fully wolf. Humanwise she's taller than Lyra.
>>
>>44571683
>>44571957
Alternatively (and less frighteningly): a knoll
>>
>>44572145
I thought it was closer to a van than a bus.
>>
>>44572117
I think she's something like 7-8ish feet tall? Upright, anyway.
>>
>>44572186
Eh, not sure. I always pictured her as this is my head.
>>
The point is, she's big.
>>
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The thread needs more spider pics.
>>
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>>44571382
Holy crap, you're not dead! Welcome back!
>>
>>44572373

>they actually animated the screen distortion

What anime is this?
>>
>>44572399
Yuyushiki
>>
>>44572399
Yuyushiki. It's a show about three lesbians processing data.
>>
>>44572440
Is that an euphemism?
>>
>>44572454
Yes the only on that is real is the blonde one.
>>
>>44572265
For a moment I thought that horses tail was something else
>>
>>44572454
The pink one would like you to think so, the blue one can't tell the difference, and the yellow one would say no.
>>
WHAT

WHAAAAAT


This entire thread is just going to be people reacting to REQM coming alive again. This is amazing.
>>
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YAY YOU ARE BACK
GREATEST JOY
WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE
Sadly, my tablet broke, or I would draw for the queen.
>>
Hmm what sort of blessings does everyone think our team will receive as well what kind of weapon are we expecting Lyra to find?
>>
>>44572454
Absolutely maybe.
>>
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>>44572440
>>44572454
>>44572468
>>44572487
>>
>>44572526
Honestly I think we already have this one or are coming to some kind of cap on blessings.
>>
>>44572526
Honestly, I'm half expecting Lyra to carry out another monster-friend from the dungeon. Yeah, I know that's not actually possible.
>>
>>44572536
Literally "it's all an autistic girl's coma dream imagination" tier. Go sit in the corner.
>>
>>44572550
There's never enough blessings...especially if Lyra ends up gaining a 'bountiful' blessing.
>>44572560
The only other new teammate we need is Brij.
>>
>>44572526
Probably none. Going into a dungeon hoping to get a blessing is one of the best ways to not get a blessing, after all.
>>
>>44572645
yeah, a new blessing is a fool's game.

What we should be on the lookout for is LOOT we want. Think big here, loot includes a lot of things from actual valuables to something delicious to good architectural ideas since apparently we are also a structural engineer in our off time.
>>
>>44572645
It's the opposite of that actually, doing things like playing with fire, fighting big things ect to get a blessing means you won;t ever get them. The exception is a Dungeon where you can because a Dungeon will often be harder than getting the blessing normally word of REQM
>>
>>44572645
>>44572683
Ya, the Dungeons are specifically made as challenges to get Blessings from the gods. Making it so you can't get a Blessing from a Dungeon if you went there for a Blessing would sorta defeat the point.

I do think that not all Dungeons give Blessings though, not sure.
>>
>>44572645
Other way around Anon. Completing a Dungeon is the only way to intentionally get a blessing.

If you do something heroic or impressive with the intention of showing off to the gods and getting a Blessing, thy'll turn their noses up at you. But a Dungeons patron will give one to an adventurer that completes a Dungeon.

That makes me wonder. If it's a group effort, do they all get the blessing at the end of the Dungeon? Just the leader or the one that did the most? Would some get it while others might not?
>>
>>44572719
>I do think that not all Dungeons give Blessings though, not sure.
It's supposed to be the Dungeons of specific Gods that give blessing not other ones, the fields of hate and gold don't sound like one unless there is a god of harvest with anger management issues
>>
we should maybe come back with a spider web on the way out and just pick up a whole bushel of weasels.

They might be tasty or something. Or we can try to figure out stuffed meats.
>>
>>44572683
We're also sort of a cook. Though our only expertise is barbecue.

Maybe we should try baking and pastries sometimes.
>>
Sheszka is awake. It only takes a bit of encouragement to get her off your shell and ready to fight, the wolf stretching and yawning and generally making everything around her that much cooler.

In terms of temperature.

You stride fearlessly up the hill, your attention honing itself to a razor point- grip tightening on your spear, the air around you heating ever so slightly.
Even if it's just the first floor, it's a boss. Or a guard for the gate.

Your lips twitch upwards into a grin as you imagine what kind of challenge you'll get.

A golem? A wheat golem? Or something stone? Magic sparking through the air, the kind of challenge you'll really-

"Ah."
"Huh?"
"It's a giant thing. Yes."
"Kill it. Kill all of them, ssso they can't bite any more lamia."

You blink blankly as you stare down the hill, deflating by the second.

The boss of the weasel lair is a giant weasel.

This- Who designed this dungeon? This isn't even ten-foot-square rooms bad. Oh, it's an open field. Full of weasels.
Anything dangerous?
More weasels.
Treasure?
Weasels.
How about traps?
Pitfalls full of weasels.

You're exaggerating, but this weasel is going to die badly for it's transgressions.
You pick up speed as you nearly fly down the hill, a chittering hiss growing in your lungs, eyes gleaming as you level your spear like the knights of old-

>Overrun it!
>Bodyslam the weasel.
>Jump on it. Stab it with everything.
>Other (?)
>>
>>44572763
I think we should move from what we know to peripheral goods.

So, from barbecue, we would go to, say, pan cooking. Frying, simmering, deep frying, steaming, etc.

Figure out all those various meat dumplings and fritters and suchwhat.
>>
>>44572810
>>Overrun it!
>>
Just finished reading all the archives, and I am glad I could catch your triumphant return REQM!
>>
>>44572810
>>Overrun it!
I want to test whether our koolaidman ability works on monsters.
>>
>>44572810
>Jump on it. Stab it with everything.
We've got 10 limbs and all of them are sharp. We should leverage that.
>>
>>44572810
>>Overrun it!

Some God is laughing right now and will give us a weasel killing blessing that we will speak of to no one ever
>>
>>44572810
>Jump on it. Stab it with everything.
Stabbing all day everyday.
>>
>>44572810
> Other (Greet it)
>>
>>44572810
>>Overrun it!
>>
>>44572810
>Jump on it. Stab it with everything.
>>
Is this why it's the fields of wheat and hate? Hateful weasels, and everyone hates it?
>>
>>44572810

>Overrun it!

We don't want to leap, because weasels are slippery little fucks. Stay on the ground and able to adjust to where it moves.
>>
>>44572867
I think there is some worse monster that we did not see because we didn't actually set the fields on fire like is expected.
>>
>>44572810
>Overrun it!
>>
>>44572810
>Jump on it. Stab it with everything.
>>
>>44572810
Stab that weasel, of course
>>
>>44572810
>>Jump on it. Stab it with everything.
>>
>>44572810
>SKEWER. Then apply fire. Have a weasel roast.
>>
>>44572810
>Other
Trying some earth magic between the stabbing might be good practice.

So this is like a dungeon tutorial level?
>>
>>44572810
>>Turn on our side and punt it with four of our legs
>>
>>44572905

IIRC this is the opening level, the 'border' between the rest of the dungeon and the outside.
>>
>>44572810
>Overrun it!
>>
>SOMEBODY CALL FOR STABY TIMES?
>>
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>>44572810

Ah right. Here. Have a spider.
>>
>>44572810
>Jump up and down on its corpse out of frustration at weasels
>>
>>44572905
I don't think Lyra's Earth Elemental Control works very well in this dungeon, When she tried to do the Tremor sense, it didn't work.

>You can't feel any spirits. And no spirits means no radar.
>You tap the ground a few times with your leg- It's definitely dirt and stone and all that, but it feels... cut off. Like there isn't magma, or a world moving beneath. Like you're somewhere else.

She might still be able to cast earth magic, but it'll probably be harder, and almost certainly require charges from her amulet.
>>
>>44573032
Is that new art? I haven't seen that one yet.
>>
>bathtime lyra
>>
>>44573067

It is new! Courtesy of an artist named Toorops. I've had it for a little while, but was waiting for this to run again.
>>
>>44573032
o boi

Hiatus gives the artists time to work I guess
>>
APPLY SPIDER DIRECTLY TO WEASEL AREA. DO NOT EXCEED 6 SPIDERS IN A 24 HOUR PERIOD.

Also, 6d100, please.

>>44573032
Oh, wow. Thank-you!
More for the vault!
>>
>>44573051
Yep. But this is a (relatively) safe place to practice, and not every place we visit will be full of friendly spirits, right?

Meh, it was a thought.
>>
Rolled 29, 93, 28, 85, 6, 74 = 315 (6d100)

>>44573102
First roll after archive binging
>>
Rolled 18, 42, 38, 67, 4, 75 = 244 (6d100)

>>44573102

welcome back
>>
Rolled 8, 95, 57, 82, 28, 60 = 330 (6d100)

>>44573102
>>
Rolled 53, 9, 36, 1, 94, 35 = 228 (6d100)

>>44573102
>>
Rolled 72, 66, 83, 72, 51, 79 = 423 (6d100)

>>44573102
Six? Wow, lots of dice
>>
So it looks like
29, 95, 57, 85, 28, 75
>>
>>44573126

Good that was outside of the first three.
>>
>>44573143
Are...are these lizard dice? I knew the spiderdice in Lizard yesterday were trapped!
>>
>>44573032
>>44573071
>all of lyra's crew has bikinis because she can't figure out how to make a one piece
>>
>>44573143
Correct!

Writing!
>>
>>44573181
yup the dice got confuzzled
>>
>>44573143

LIZARDS STOLE OUR DICE
>>
>>44573260

Really, this isn't bad. Only one die below average.
>>
>>44573343
two below 30 on best of 3 is pretty wacky; bo3's average is something like 80 or 75
>>
It must be the price of being so bloodthirsty and attacking first, instead of talking to it and accepting its quest to find the silver weasel hidden within the wheat field.

Though statistically, we still did quite well. Only two out of six below fifty.
>>
>>44573398

Distracted by spider-kini
>>
>>44573343

Look at previous RE:M thread rolls.

We have gotten best-of-3 below 50 on a combat roll somewhere around... twice? Maybe?
>>
>>44573450
Lyra is historically quite bashful, so yeah.
>>
>>44573032
Huh I thought Lyra's hair was more blonde...like a light straw blonde.
>>
>>44573822
I think we're black hair just like our mum&sisters

Heck, we were all pretty damn identical before we all grew different colorations and models.
>>
>>44573822
She's had black hair since the first thread
>>
>>44573822

Claymore!Lyra would be interesting, but no, Lyra's hair is as black as the night.
>>
>>44573839

Sara apparently has 'pale' hair, or at least had it when she was a kid. Thread 2:

>Sara's dainty features, haloed by pale hair made her seem insubstantial.

I think everyone else has always been black-haired like Mom, though.
>>
>>44573932
I've always seen Sara's as silver-blonde
>>
>>44573839
>>44573840
>>44573932
Huh looks like I'm going to have to go back and reread the entire quest from the beginning...I'm okay with this.
>>44573885
But we don't have a claymore yet to pull it off.
>>
You continue on, unheeding, fully determined in your goal to run over this gods-damned weasel and everything it stands for.
In pursuit of justice and better dungeons. In search of treasure and a half decent fight.

The issue is that weasels are long, snakelike things.

And it sort of just squirms out of the way of your spear, making a noise like an angry teapot.
It takes a second to click that a giant weasel is potentially better at whistling than you are.

Your response, of course, is measured and not at all affected by this revelation. It's entirely natural for your to arrest your momentum so quickly that your legs actually ache, grab the weasel by the neck and slam it into the ground like a giant furry whip.

Sheszka, wisely, stays outside of what has become the 'whipping zone'.
Jin is overhead, strafing it in between your attacks, her utterly silent wingbeats eclipsed by the fact that she's hooting and throwing around magical starfire like it's some sort of national holiday.

Ezzy, united in your desire for the annihilation of weaselkind, is cheering you on in hissing tones.

And Nin is currently under attack via hordes of small weasels, who are literally nipping at her heels.

And now that the immediate anger is bleeding off, you feel mildly ridiculous.
The giant weasel is still kind of alive, though.

>Nin. Nin, stop that, you can fly.
>Maybe you can eat it? It looks kinda boney, though.
>This is a perfect opportunity to beat a weasel with another, bigger weasel.
>Just kill it and go. And forget this whole floor.
>Other (?)
>>
Oh yeah for those who don't know I was in talks with Argentorum a few weeks back and unfortunately Re: Human quest is dead.
>>
>>44573822

Blonde hair or Yellow Eyes (not both) would probably work better with her color scheme
>>
>>44573996

While you do, see if you can find anywhere he mentions what the moths look like other than 'small and dainty'.

Been bugging the hell out of me.
>>
>>44574045

> This is a perfect opportunity to beat a weasel with another, bigger weasel
>>
>>44574045
>>Nin. Nin, stop that, you can fly.
Alse Ezzy get down there and earn your keep again you lazy scarf!
>>
>>44574045
>>Nin. Nin, stop that, you can fly.
>>Just kill it and go. And forget this whole floor.
>>
>>44574045
>>Nin. Nin, stop that, you can fly.
>>This is a perfect opportunity to beat a weasel with another, bigger weasel.
>>
>>44574045
>>Nin. Nin, stop that, you can fly.

I don't know how much of a threat weasels are to moths but I don't want to know
>>
>>44574081
*Also
>>
>>44574045
>>Just kill it and go. And forget this whole floor.
>>
>>44574045
>>This is a perfect opportunity to beat a weasel with another, bigger weasel.
We've been training Nin for combat, right? Now's her chance to show off!
>>
>>44574045

>Nin. Nin, stop that, you can fly.
>This is a perfect opportunity to beat a weasel with another, bigger weasel.

>>44574081

Weasels are bad for snek. This has been stated by both REQM and snek herself.
>>
>>44574045
>>Nin. Nin, stop that, you can fly.
>Just kill it and go. And forget this whole floor.
>>
>>44574045
>>>44574045
>Just kill it and go. And forget this whole floor.
Bite it?
>Nin. Nin, stop that, you can fly.
>>
>>44574045
>Nin. Nin, stop that, you can fly.
>Just kill it and go. And forget this whole floor.

The next floor better have better monsters. Or else!
>>
>>44574045
>>This is a perfect opportunity to beat a weasel with another, bigger weasel.
>Nin. Nin, stop that, you can fly.
>Maybe you can eat it? It looks kinda boney, though.
>>
>>44574045
>Nin. Nin, stop that, you can fly.
>>
>>44574045
>This is a perfect opportunity to beat a weasel with another, bigger weasel.
Specifically, the weasels going after Nin.
>>
>>Nin. Nin, stop that, you can fly.
>>This is a perfect opportunity to beat a weasel with another, bigger weasel

Glad to see you back REQM
>>
>>44574045
>Nin. Nin, stop that, you can fly.
>Maybe you can eat it? It looks kinda boney, though.
>>
>>44574130
>>44574127
>>44574126
>>44574112
>>44574089
>>44574081

You anons have failed justice. Fate throws a giant, pseudo-conscious weasel flail into your hands and you what? Don't beat other smaller weasels with it. Disgustin.
>>
>>44574045
>Nin. Nin, stop that, you can fly.
>This is a perfect opportunity to beat a weasel with another, bigger weasel
>>
>>44574046
That's disappointing.
>>
>>44574175
I want a speed record for clearing this silly, silly dungeon, though.
>>
>>44574046

There was an RE: Human Quest?
>>
>>44574209
Yeah he said he just lost inspiration and life got in the way.
>>44574246
Yep, 80 year old granny dies in her sleep gets second chance again life in the world of Re: Monster....EX-verse.
>>
Away we go!
Please provide 2d100!
>>
>>44574045

> This is a perfect...
WEASEL ON WEASEL VIOLENCE!
>>
>>44574214

Remember, gods don't like it when you try to go for a blessing.

If we /try/ to go fast, then the God of Haste won't bless us with flash-stepping when we beat the uberweasel at the end of the dungeon.
>>
>>44574175
This pleb-tier dungeon level does not deserve to witness our advanced weapon improvisation skills.

Maybe we can take the concussed weasel with us, and whip something more deserving with it on the next level?
>>
Rolled 46, 98 = 144 (2d100)

>>44574296
>>
Rolled 99, 58 = 157 (2d100)

>>44574296
rolling for weasel violence.
>>
Rolled 19, 4 = 23 (2d100)

>>44574296
Rolling weasels everywhere.
>>
>>44574316
>>44574318
SPIDER DICE ARE BACK BOYS!
>>
Rolled 36, 47 = 83 (2d100)

>>44574296
>>
Rolled 3, 71 = 74 (2d100)

>>44574296
>>
>>44574321
I'm so sorry, these were terrible, Jesus Christ what is my luck today.
>>
>>44574316
>>44574318
>>44574321
99 and 98!

Writing!
>>
98, 99

So, how many flying bits litter the surrounding.. mile of dungeon?
>>
>>44574348
I'm sorry anon but you've contracted terminal Lizard Dice.
>>
does anyone remember if dungeon monsters can leave the dungeon?

Can we bring dungeon snacks out of the dungeon?
>>
>>44574309
I don't care about blessings. I just want to see the looks on the Adventurer's Guild's faces when we come up an hour after going in, muttering about how easy it was.
>>
>>44574472

LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT SPIDERS.

AND THEN I'LL TELL YOU ABOUT ADVENTURERS.

AND THEN, WHEN ARE CRYING YOURSELF TO SLEEP AT NIGHT, I WILL TELL YOU ABOUT GIANT SPIDER ADVENTURERS.
>>
>>44574446
>does anyone remember if dungeon monsters can leave the dungeon?

Intentionally, by themselves?

Not normally, but apparently it happened once and people keep and eye out for it now.

>Can we bring dungeon snacks out of the dungeon?

Harvesting monster parts is a regular job at the guild, so yeah.
>>
>>44574472
Yeah, Lyra is kinda stupidly powerful. The first few floors are probably more her friends' level.
>>
>>44574472
No! I want Lyra to get a hold of an awesome scythe that drinks the blood of those it slices to produce healing fruit!
>>
>>44574536
>No! I want Lyra to get a hold of an awesome scythe that drinks the blood of those it slices to produce healing fruit!

For some reason, this made me imagine Lyra as the Good Hunter from Bloodborne.

And then I screamed eternally.
>>
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>>44574536

>scythe
>not spear
>>
>>44574569
Nah that's for the Water Dungeon to give us.
>>
I'm gonna be honest, lyra develops exactly like a diablo boss mob. Just getting more and more adjectives.
>>
>>44574472
>>44574521
Lyra OP, Plz buff
>>
>>44574586
when lyra eventually dies of old age, gold and weapons will fly out of her body in a shower.
>>
>>44574582
A possible look into the possible spear Lyra could loot from the Water Dungeon.
>>
>>44574569
>spear
>not weasel
>>
>>44574650
Shower? you mean mountain forming geyser right?
>>
>>44574586

>arachne
>red widow arachne
>(red) grave arachne
>(red) hearthbound tyrant arachne

Don't know if we gain more, but they certainly get more impressive.
>>
>>44574632
Just pondering, do we have a measure of Lyra's physical strength? I got the feeling it was somewhere around 'punch through reinforced steel' last evolution.

I'm leaning toward 'if you're an enemy and in melee range, you'd better hope you're incorporeal' about now.
>>
>>44574650
Father Time will rank up twice mid-conversation and have no idea why. Upon returning home, he'll find a giant, spider-shaped trophy on his mantelpiece and a note reading "Achievement Unlocked."
>>
>>44574707
It's "Stop endgame human adventurer's great sword swing with one hand" strong
>>
>>44574707
She pushed her hand directly into the ground without trying very hard a few threads ago. I don't remember if that was pre or post tier 4, though, so she might be even stronger than that.
>>
>>44574707
lyra's physical strength is roughly "Industrial robot arm" level, in my mind.

Based on how I think she is powered by industrial machine sized hydraulics.
>>
>>44574707

Well, on our previous evolution, we could push a flat hand through solid rock.

Don't know if we've gotten a measure since then.
>>
>>44574694
Hearthbound Tyrant Arachne

Her Highness the Crimson Guardian
Lyra Niallasdottir of Firescarn, Thunderbreaker and Bane of Scales, Bone Crusher, Destroyer of Magic, Slayer of Beasts, Master of the Forge, Shaper of Earth, Weilder of Lighting and Caller of fire. Rebuilder of the Lost, Restorer of the Ancient, Spearwielder, Dungeonbreaker and Friend of Oakring.
Queen of the forest, Unifier of the tribes, Alpha of wolves, friend of harpies, protector of moths, Cousin to the Forestwalker, Adventurer among humans, Host and Guide of half-elves, ruler of all monsters of the great forest and Giant Spider.
>>
>>44574707
Well considering we leave indents in the solid steel shaft of our spear if we squeeze to hard I'd say pretty damn strong.
>>
>>44574784
>indents
Last time that happened we bent it like a curly straw.
Although admittedly, the spear is actually iron, not steel. We hadn't finished the forging lessons at the time we modified it, so in reshaping the spear we pulled all the carbon and other impurities out.
>>
>>44574650

>Implying Lyra and her gang won't ascend to become immortals.
>>
>>44574694
It was actually Forgesworn Grave Arachne

And I think Ruby Widow? dunno for sure.
>>
>>44574867
That will be interesting. Though Lyra would be the last one to evolve to the last tier, presumably.

Imagine traveling with Demigod Nin and Jin? Telling the harpy to put that star back where she found it and getting the moth to please stop mass-charming the city into accepting Lyra's rule?
>>
>>44574926
>Imagine traveling with Demigod Nin and Jin? Telling the harpy to put that star back where she found it and getting the moth to please stop mass-charming the city into accepting Lyra's rule?
Please by that time Lyra will be so used to either stopping or reversing Nin's antics that not even Nin's Blessings of the God of Heralds would help the moth.
>>
You-
And all your friends, sans one fleeing moth-
Stand and watch said moth.

She is currently running uphill, and then downhill, and then uphill again, in an S pattern, spinning and jumping, stabbing the occasional weasel and general making a show of her pursuit.

She notices the lack of noise, though.

"Hey!"
"Yes?"
She skips forwards, out of reach of the snapping jaws of, well, another weasel.

"Why aren't you helping me?"
"You- you do remember that you can fly, yes?"

She narrowly dodges another flying toothtube, opening her mouth to protest.

And then she takes flight, to the consternation of her pursuers, who hiss and whistle and make other stupid noises as she soars away.

You bring the big one down onto them, disposing of them like the vermin they are.
Maybe a bit harder than that.

You gave the swing a bit of extra oomph.
Which is to say that something is clearly very broken about weasel sr., and the rest of them are know stains.

You let go of the limp bag of shattered bones as Nin lands neatly on your skull, propping up your head with one hand as you sigh.
On the plus side, the gate has sparked to life now, stones glowing with silver and gold, a visible tear in space appearing atop the hill.

You give it a glance before you turn your attention to your friends- Taping Nin's bites closed after she's dusted them, coaxing Jin down from the sky. Not thinking about where Sheszka's mass goes when she changes size.

Ezzy glowers triumphantly back as you make your way towards the portal, altogether excessively pleased with the results of your combat.
You don't bother looking behind you.
The weasel wasn't important enough to earn loot, and didn't smell appetizing enough to bother trying to cook it. You'll pin your hopes on the future, and the deeper levels of the dungeon.

You step through.

....

Well, it's another field.
More wheat.
>>
>>44575219

On the other hand, the wheat is now colossal, and nearly blotting out the sun, casting warm shadows across your path. It bodes well for the future potential food. This pleases you.

A giant weasel scurries from behind a stalk of wheat, and you immediately treat it to a fist to the face, cracking its skull and dropping it to the dirt in a split second, the manic smile never leaving your visage.

If there is nothing but weasels in this hell dimension you will tear a god from their seat tonight.
>>
>>44575237
oh!

GIANTER WEASELS!
>>
>>44575237
Oh god, we are actually spider sized now...
>>
>>44575253
QUICK! WE MUST SPIN A WEB! WHO KNOWS WHAT WE'LL CATCH!
>>
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>>44575253
>>
>>44575237
"If there is nothing but weasels in this hell dimension you will tear a god from their seat tonight." Lyra, never change, also do this.
>>
>>44575237
And that is it for the evening!

Thanks to everyone for participating, especially after my time away.

I'll try and manage a thread a week at least, though I will be starting later than I used to from now on.

Comments, questions and all that answered in thread!
>>
>>44575253
oh shit.

OH SHIT

WE MUST SPIN WEBS AND BURROW NOW
>>
>>44575299
Thanks for running boss.


This feel short to anyone else?
>>
>>44575237

>the wheat is now colossal... It bodes well for the future potential food. This pleases you.

Never change, Lyra.
>>
>>44575318
Not just you.
>>
>>44575299
Thanks for running!
>>
>>44575318

It only feels short because we want it to last forever.
>>
>>44575299
Thanks for running man.
It's not a question, but I hope this is regular.
>>
>>44575299
Thanks for continuing!
>>
>>44575299
Thanks for running!
>>
>>44575299
Thanks for the run after so long....any questions I'll have I'll ask on Ask.
>>
>>44570303
>trying to clear the feeling that you've been staring out into a field of wheat for months.
Ha!

>>44575299
Aww it's over.
>>
>>44575318
REQM's first few threads were only 100~ replies, lasting only a few hours. None of this Valen Quest 12-20 hour thread stuff.
>>
>>44575318
>>44575335
>>44575349
>>44575359
>>44575364
>>44575373

Thanks for playing!

>>44575341
>>44575333
>>44575318
It is shorter than usual- I started later, and ended at the same time roughly I used to. Weekend threads, when they happen, will be better.
But for the moment, I'm limited by my job.
>>
>>44575410
It's no problem boss, I'm just glad you're back
>>
>>44575410

It's fine, everything is fine.

You came back to us, and that's all we could have ever asked for.

Now give me my heart back, you organ-thieving fuck.
>>
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>>44575410
Thanks for running, It's great to have you back.
>>
>>44575410

It's fine REQM, anything you give us is gold, and a beacon on these honestly depressingly long nights. Why must I work the Night-shift when the day only lasts 6 hours and every moment after and before is pitch black?
>>
Well, time to be itty bitty lyra.

I feel it is time to point out that weasels eat spiders, unless they are very venomous.
>>
>>44575600
Weasels also eat rats that are about three times their size and weight.
>>
>>44575705
yeah, so, I'm a bit worried here.
>>
>>44575705

Spiders eat anything they manage to snag.

Like giant fucking snakes, or birds.

Nature in general is kinda fucked, it's less a food-chain and more of a food hyper-dimensional infinite knot.
>>
>>44575747
I was just informing you guys about what i know about weasels. They're nasty little bastards that eat shit way above their weight class, but so do we.



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