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>>45644600
Look, it's as much a surprise to you as it is to her, okay?

Well, that's your reply, but inside, you can't help but understand how she feels. You KNOW strange moods are weird, but this... this is really, really weird. Even if it weren't for the sharicite, you're not sure you like the look of all that bone and leather decorating the door. From the shape of them, those bones don't look like ANYTHING you're familiar with.

Tentatively, you reach out and grab the door's handle. It doesn't fit perfectly to your hand- it's made for someone smaller- but it's polished, smooth, and still warm to the touch.

You make to pull it open, but a scraping sound behind you makes you glance back over your shoulder. The way Blanc has all but teleported back to the other side of the room gives you pause.

M... maybe you should be more careful with the physically-impossible dimension-crossing murder door you made in a fell mood.

>CHOOSE ONE OF THE FOLLOWING:
[ ] [OPEN SESAME] You don't have time to worry about this. Just open it and go through, you've got too much shit to do in your Hyperdimension fortress as it is.
[ ] [SLOWLY, CAREFULLY OPEN THE DOOR] Lever it open inch by inch, and prepare yourself for, say, some sort of vacuum effect. Or soul-stealing dickery. Last time you went through, it threw your soul into a goddess's body, after all.
[ ] [ROLL TO CHECK] Take some time to inspect the door, and do what you can to make sure it's all a-okay.
[ ] [ASK BLANC] Ask the bonafide goddess's opinion on the physically impossible door made from the crystallized belief to a long-dead divine being. She's bound to have more experience with this material than you.
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>45644613
>[x] [SLOWLY, CAREFULLY OPEN THE DOOR] Lever it open inch by inch, and prepare yourself for, say, some sort of vacuum effect. Or soul-stealing dickery. Last time you went through, it threw your soul into a goddess's body, after all.

Not that anything could possibly go wrong. But we need to look somewhat competent in front of Blanc.

Also, hi Blorp!

>>45644613
>[ ] [ROLL TO CHECK] Take some time to inspect the door, and do what you can to make sure it's all a-okay.
>[ ] [ASK BLANC] Ask the bonafide goddess's opinion on the physically impossible door made from the crystallized belief to a long-dead divine being. She's bound to have more experience with this material than you.
>[ ] [TAKE A DRIN- WAIT FUCK]
Welcome back!

>>45644613
>[ ] [OPEN SESAME] You don't have time to worry about this. Just open it and go through, you've got too much shit to do in your Hyperdimension fortress as it is.

>>45644613
>[ ] [PUDDING] Crave some pudding

>>45644613
>[x] [OPEN SESAME] You don't have time to worry about this. Just open it and go through, you've got too much shit to do in your Hyperdimension fortress as it is.
It's not like magma megaprojects ever get test run either before they are activated, right?

Which nation would be so fortunate as to have Papers, Please as border control? Lastation?

>>45644613
>[ ] [SLOWLY, CAREFULLY OPEN THE DOOR] Lever it open inch by inch, and prepare yourself for, say, some sort of vacuum effect. Or soul-stealing dickery. Last time you went through, it threw your soul into a goddess's body, after all.

>>45644613
>SLOWLY, CAREFULLY OPEN THE DOOR

>>45644600
Y U AFRAID OF A LITTLE TORNADO BLORP?

>>45644613
>[ ] [OPEN SESAME] You don't have time to worry about this. Just open it and go through, you've got too much shit to do in your Hyperdimension fortress as it is.
NEPTUNE IS STILL IN OUR BODY! HURRY MOTHERFUCKER

Also I know how to have Urist have a baby with no marriage needed

>>45644613
>[ ] [ROLL TO CHECK] Take some time to inspect the door, and do what you can to make sure it's all a-okay.

Considering what's on it it's a pretty safe bet that this door means us ill.

>>45644613
>[ ] [ROLL TO CHECK] Take some time to inspect the door, and do what you can to make sure it's all a-okay.

We make it like the Hero Quest dwarf: Checking Traps and then

>[ ] [SLOWLY, CAREFULLY OPEN THE DOOR] Lever it open inch by inch, and prepare yourself for, say, some sort of vacuum effect. Or soul-stealing dickery. Last time you went through, it threw your soul into a goddess's body, after all.

Weapons at the ready and keeping the door itself between us and what lies behind.

>>45644783
>[X] [THROW PUDDING] Open it just enough to be able to throw Pudding on the other side of the door and then close it.

We either piss something off, make something happy or nothing happens.

Right, looks like opening the door [X] [SLOWLY] wins the vote, so writing!

And thanks, guys, I'm glad to be back! Again.

>>45644845
After freelancing for a while, she's gone over to Lastation, yes!

>>45644927
MY CITY SHUTS DOWN IF WE GET EVEN TWO INCHES OF SNOW, I DON'T TRUST IT TO HANDLE FREAK TORNADOES

>>45644961
... I'm mildly intrigued and horrified at the same time.

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>>45645100
Noire does paperwork for old men

>>45645100
>... I'm mildly intrigued and horrified at the same time.

It's simple if dorf fort babbies can happen other videogames versions of reproduction can happen as well, so we just need Mojang and Urist to eat some wheat and then hug each other, and then little Urist/mojang babbies will be running around

>>45644600
oh, shit, it's back.

>>45645174
>It's simple if dorf fort babbies can happen other videogames versions of reproduction can happen as well, so we just need Mojang and Urist to eat some wheat and then hug each other, and then little Urist/mojang babbies will be running around

And why does someone want that to happen? For what sane reason does some one entertain the notion of reproduction between game personifications?

>>45645157
Wait, where are all those pictures? I clearly wasn't given the memo!

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>>45645228
>oh, hell yeah, it's back.
fix'd

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>>45644600

ｷﾀ━━━━━━(゜∀゜)━━━━━━ッ!!

Also randomly, pixels.

I'm so sorry.

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>>45644600
Oh boy! The most exciting time of the day is back!

>>45645298
I'm not sorry

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>>45645100
How has Exey changed with the ADVENT of XCOM 2?

>>45645392
Anon, I think that's something we'll have to find out.

zombies pls go we all know the real blorp died

>>45645100
>safe
>not throwing caution to the wind
These aren't the dwarves I know

>>45645392
A lot deadlier I bet I mean holy shit, you shot how many times in a single turn?

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>>45645298
You glorious, glorious bastard, I lost it at her expression.

DON'T STOP, NEVER BE SORRY and by that I mean thank you, anon

>>45645392
As long as the obssesion of some with the snakewomen/vipers doesn't seep into Exey, it shouldn't be to severe.

>>45645298
Shouldn't that be proto Purple Heart instead of Urist on the bottom?

>>45645392
Jesus, why is it so slow?

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>>45645554
If you mean Blorp: give him time. He needs ~ 1 hour, sometimes more. Quality needs time. (Even tough people tend to forget that.)

>>45645554
I can't even open that, and larger images are timing out too. Seems gerbils running 4chan's media servers are dead.

>>45645653
No, I mean the xcom weebum I quoted.
There's agood three seconds after the first slice where both guys are just sitting there and no actions can be taken.
Why is the gameplay so slow, jesus.

>>45645677
Its called bad inefficient programming.

>>45645677
How short was the time that the developers had to code and make X-com 2? Sadly, I don't remember, but a good and stable game needs 5 + years.

>>45645677
There's some pretty atrocious timing things in the game. Well, there's a mod to fix that, and devs are going to tweak them shorter too.

Bit late since I just got off work, but good to see you again Blorp.

>>45645783
Dev time depends on size and scope and how much is predone.
Xcom 2 looks to be based on Enemy Unknown, so there's already a debugged base to work on. That reduces dev time by a great amount.
I'll admit I don't have a PC strong enough to play it, so I'm making assumptions based on screenshots and such.

>>45645898
There's huge amount of things that are new in 2. And I read that late, late into the dev cycle they amped up the diffucylty across board. Some systems weren't engaging the players as they should have because the game was too easy.

>>45645898
A lot of what they've done would have undone a bunch of the debugging from EU.

Well, I'm waiting for Xenonauts 2 anyway

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>>45644613
>[X] [SLOWLY, CAREFULLY OPEN THE DOOR]

You stop to think.

You're pleasantly surprised when Neptune's brain doesn't sputter under the strain of your mind putting the goddess's gray matter through its paces, and you almost have it in you to feel bad about having that thought, but- /Neptune/.

Anyway.

You don't know much about dimensions and all that science-y shit, but you're reasonably sure that it's ill-advised to suddenly throw open a door to a chaos-strewn realm where gravity does whatever the hell it wants. Hell, sharicite is already notoriously unstable as it is, and history is littered with the ashes of idiots who tried hammering at the crystallized belief with hammers and tong, and you're the first person in Gamindustri to turn a chunk of sharicite into a piece of furniture.

Normally, you don't care one whit about safety or test runs of strange monstrous things, but you're /Dwarf Fortress/, and there's no guarantee that ANYTHING you make that's more complicated than a bed will work without causing a 75% mortality rate or something like that.

... that's a very, very long-winded way of saying "you slowly open the door by a crack and wait to see if you all die horribly."

Immediately, the room is filled with the hyperdimensional void's constant deep WHUM WHUUM WHUUM sound, but that's it. After a few moments of failing to implode into messy gory chunks, you open the door further, peering through the crack.

You're almost underwhelmed by how normal it all is. Over there is that chaotically whirling galactic vista you know so well, the one that acts as the "sky" for the entire hyperdimensional void. Over /there/ are the floating islands, filled with rocky outcroppings and struggling alien plant life, and all that jazz. You're even sure that you see a few will-o-wisps flitting between islands, too far to give you any trouble.

The only wrinkle is that the door opens up onto an unfamiliar island, covered in thorny vines as thick as your torso.

(Cont.)

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>>45646114
Blanc's back beside you again, the blue-haired brunette (yes, you know how stupid that sounds, but it's the truth) frowning thoughtfully. "Out near the rim. This isn't where you live in the void, is it."

Honestly, you have no idea about the geography or anything. As far as you know, your fortress is where your fortress is, and that's that.

"Mm. Let's go."

Wait, wha- shit! Before you can stop her, Blanc steps through the portal, carefully making her way through the thorny vines. She's long since changed out of her jammies, but you don't think her usual skirt is ANY match for this kind of terrain.

Then again, any and all of the CPUs' light-up cleavage bikinis don't strike you as a match for ANY kind of terrain, and that's exactly what you're wearing right now.

... shit. You don't like this, but it's not like you have a choice in the matter. Last thing you want to do is be indirectly responsible for the death of Nintendo's deity.

>CHOOSE ONE OF THE FOLLOWING:
[ ] [WALK AFTER BLANC] Well, at least Blanc has the right idea: follow in the goddess's footsteps, and keep a low profile like she's doing.
[ ] [FLY AFTER BLANC] Blanc's goddess powers might be on the fritz, but there's no reason why you can't borrow Neptune's: fly up, scout around, and get a better sense of your surroundings.
[ ] [SLASH AND BURN] There are way, way too many thorny vines around. Get in front of Blanc and chop through them with Neptune's oversized sword, clearing a path. The sooner you get back to Hyperdimension, the better.
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>45646142
>[ ] [WALK AFTER BLANC] Well, at least Blanc has the right idea: follow in the goddess's footsteps, and keep a low profile like she's doing.
I wonder if we should close the door behind us

>>45646142
>[ ] [WALK AFTER BLANC] Well, at least Blanc has the right idea: follow in the goddess's footsteps, and keep a low profile like she's doing.

>>45646181
Nah, what could possibly go wrong? Besides everything.

>>45646142
>[x] [FLY AFTER BLANC] Blanc's goddess powers might be on the fritz, but there's no reason why you can't borrow Neptune's: fly up, scout around, and get a better sense of your surroundings.

would it be possible to meet Dawn of War? Or even other games like Spec op The Line (Probably just as damaged as Souls).

Here's hoping that Space Engineers makes an appearance.

>>45646142
>[X] [WALK AFTER BLANC] Well, at least Blanc has the right idea: follow in the goddess's footsteps, and keep a low profile like she's doing.
Look, she obviously knows what she's doing, and I don't know about U, but Wii would like to survive.

>>45646142
>[X] [WALK AFTER BLANC] Well, at least Blanc has the right idea: follow in the goddess's footsteps, and keep a low profile like she's doing.

Gehen wir zu fuss!

>>45646142
>[ ] [FLY AFTER BLANC] Blanc's goddess powers might be on the fritz, but there's no reason why you can't borrow Neptune's: fly up, scout around, and get a better sense of your surroundings.

In Urists normal body I would recommend walking, but I think HDD Neptune is a bit to big to do that efficiently trough thick undergrowth.
Also, salsh and burn is to noisy. Don't want some of the Void denizens accidentally finding the portal.

speaking of the portal:
>[ ] [Closing the portal behind you] Exactly what it says on the tin.

>>45646270

Are you suggesting female space marines?

Moe Marines?

>>45646270
DoW, like other WH games won't appear. The question came already up on ask.fm.

>>45646270
>Not looking at Ask before asking shit questions.

Kill yourself.

>>45646292
spess moe-rines?

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Jesus fuck, Spec Ops TL. If they had a place where they lock up the demented and insane games in Gamindustri she would be there.

Okay, looks like the vote's settled on [X] [WALK], so writing!

>>45645392
Belatedly, probably a little better at melee combat, but I'm keeping her in XCOM 1 mode for now! Maybe until Firaxis hammers out all the problems with the game, so I won't have to go SHE'S SOOO SLOOOOOOW

>>45646270
Dawn of War is a licensed tie-in, so no go!

Spec Op: The Line would be... interesting, and possibly not in a way that makes life easier for Urist! Haven't had plans to include it, though.

Space Engineers is probably tearing her hair out as being the unofficial caretaker of Kerbal Space Program and screaming internally day in and day out

Space Engi-chan. I want this.

Space engineers and Medevil engineers both.

At the same time. In bed.

>>45646433
If you only look at the newest Spec Ops, I would say the same. But the earlier ones where way more sane/conventional. It is just that the series got usurped by someone who didn't understand that anti - war games should never exist.

>>45646485
And Besiege?

Door Kickers would be badass in Gamindustri

>>45646467
But Exey fights turn-based, so she forces all her opponents to wait through those pauses as well!

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>>45646514

Yes.

>>45646525
Probably part of a security firm somewhere with Rainbow6.

>realize somewhere there may be female versions of Asura and Kratos
Those two have a very poor opinion of gods.

What would a Hyper realistic war simulator like Arma be like? reguler soldier? or what?

>>45646617
Drunk in front of the Call of Duty temple, cussing out everyone who goes in there for being 'a filthy casual'.

>>45646617
Gritty war torn soldier

>>45646607
It's been mentioned various games get into anti-god moods, and the goddesses know what to do at those times.
IE hide.

[ ] [SLASH AND BURN] There are way, way too many thorny vines around. Get in front of Blanc and chop through them with Neptune's oversized sword, clearing a path. The sooner you get back to Hyperdimension, the better.
also close the door you weren't raised in a barn young lady

>>45646617
Not only that. They enforce "normal physics and natural laws" on all around them. Just think how that would throw a screwball in many of the games.

>>45646656
That's unbecoming of a goddess.

>>45646674
Anime physics suddenly take a shit within a X X radius around Arma? Shit, she'd be a powerhouse.

>>45646674
The concept of these crazy and powerful girls getting put in the real world makes me laugh my ass off.

>>45646691
It's becoming of someone that doesn't want to die horribly.

>>45646674
>Arma physics
>Normal
hahahahahaha
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PIJalZ4ioeg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8JoyXMkmoOk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B8o4zb0RGZQ

>>45646720
Even if they can win handily, the unnecessary conflict is better done without.

>>45646720
They aren't goddesses just because they look hot, dude. If someone behaves out of line and feels like going into a pantheocidal crusade it is the goddesses' duty to beat it into submission.

Unless that someone is Nepgear.

Speaking of -cidal crusades, I wonder what is Hatred-chan doing.

>>45646719
Also, she would probably be like Dslyecxi.

>>45646872
With or without his Magic Hacks?

>>45646828
Hatred-chan is picking flowers and frolicking in fields. It turns out all that anger was because the main character wasn't a moe anime girl. All that anger was resolved when they came to Gameindustri.

>>45646799
Forcing others to be "realistic" while exploiting it's own physics bug willy nilly? Sounds like fun.

>>45646896
It is the Hyperdimension. So of course with his tactics and skill.

>[X] [WALK AFTER BLANC] Well, at least Blanc has the right idea: follow in the goddess's footsteps, and keep a low profile like she's doing.

>>45646918
That makes sense.

>>45646828
I'm quoting Blorp on this, not talking out of my ass.
Unless I'm remembering incorrectly, and it would be nice if he'd correct me if so.

>>45646966
Kratos and Asuka are only powerful when they are angry. So an intelligent goddess hides until they have cooled down and then they mop them up. Or redirect them towrds something more productive IE beating up God whales.

>>45646828
Generally, the goddesses can tell the difference between wacky anime shenanigans ("I wanna punch a goddess in the face!", says [X game that features god-killing prominently, because Gamindustri]) and serious deicidal uprisings ("FUCK NINTY/SEGA/PLAYSTATION/XBOX"), and react accordingly!

>>45647063
>God whales.
Someone help me with this one

>>45647078
Do they ever react to the first one with friendly fisticuffs?

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>>45647091
It's either this, or a rather large, rather dangerous and rather resilient monster that looks like a whale.

>>45647118
Only Blanc and Neptune, because Blanc sometimes welcomes the chance to blow off her ENDLESS RAGE, and because Neptune is Neptune and doesn't know better, leading to wacky Benny Hill style shenanigans and headaches for poor overworked Iffy.

>>45647156
If I remenber correctly it is a type of more powerful enemies in Hyperdimension Neptunia.

>>45647205
>Blanc sometimes welcomes the chance to blow off her ENDLESS RAGE
Can't she, like, get laid or something? I mean, Leanbox is right there.

>>45647231
Indeed, that's what I meant with "rather large, rather dangerous and rather resilient monster that looks like a whale"

>>45647293
She can't because of superior Leanbox technology

>>45647293
>Can't she, like, get laid or something? I mean, Leanbox is right there.

Not every woman is angry because she hadn't have any sex lately. I think Goddesses trancend something like that. Or are/become asexual.

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>>45647293
>Blanc
>Going to Leanbox
You do realize that Leanbox and Lowee are the nations that are the farthest apart from each other, right?

>>45647388
I don't think distance is an obstacle to a goddess.

Is there a moe personification of hyperdimension neptunia?

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>>45647467
Yes, there is. She's currently in our body.

Okay, so Leanbox is Microsoft and Lowee is Nintendo.

Who the fuck is Neptunia? Sony?

>>45647597
Sony is Lastation. I think neptunia is sega

>>45647597
No, that's Lastation
Nuptunia is Sega. Because the Sega Neptune was a two-in-one Genesis and 32X console which Sega planned to release in fall 1995.

>>45647597
Leanbox = Microsoft
Lowee = Nintendo
Lastation = Sony
Neptunia = Sega

>>45647597
Oh dear child.
She's from an old, and -previously- powerful company known as SEGA. Yes, in allcaps.
Now they've been reduced to creating third party games, which is why Neptune is portrayed as a layabout airhead. She has nothing to do.

>>45647494
I guess that helps explain the crazy

>>45646142
>[X] [WALK AFTER BLANC]
>[X] [also close the door behind you, young lady, you weren't brought up in a barn]

Come on, really? Of COURSE you're not going to leave the door open. You're not that much of a fucking idiot, jeez!!

Before you go, you take one last look at Blanc's room: it's plain, austere, filled with books, floored with traditional tatami mats, and you already miss the damn place. Because it's so blessedly /normal/.

Figures. You spent so much of your life cursing Gamindustri. Then, once you got trapped in the void, you spent hours praying that you'd return to Gamindustri. And then, when you DID return, you could only stay like half an hour, tops.

The irony isn't just thick, it's multi-fucking-layered.

You leave it all behind and steel yourself before stepping out into the hyperdimensional void. There's no funky transition or psychedelic color flash, and pins and needles don't slide across your skin. It's refreshingly mundane, and as you close the door behind you, you can't help but pat yourself on the back for making proper dwarven work that isn't needlessly dramatic.

The moment you think that, of course, the door fades away into nothingness, the pictures of you getting molested lingering briefly like the Chesire Cat's smug smile before following suit.

Goddammit. You don't know whether to be ecstatic that no one else will bear witness to the pictures chronicling the Assaults of Thunder (on your tits), or deeply worried that your one ticket back to Gamindustri appears to have disappeared.

A brief check confirms that it's still in your list of artifacts. That's something, at least!

Blanc doesn't look over her shoulder when you catch up, focused as she is on putting one foot in front of the other without scraping her legs or stepping on the strange vines. So far, she's succeeding. "Not flying, Urist?"

You snort. First, the very last thing you want to do is rely on Neptune's powers. And then there's all the flying monsters here-

(Cont.)

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>>45647790
"The abyssals and the fairies, I know," Blanc interrupts you quietly. "I was about to commend you on your good judgment in not making yourself a big obvious target in unknown territory."

... wait, you have actual names for them?

"We've known the void exists for a while. Even worked together to conduct tests, since there's only so much we can do to access the void on our own." She shrugs. "That's how Vert got the idea to use it as a way to temporarily confine Arfoire."

Where those monsters /come/ from?

Blanc doesn't answer for a moment. "We think they might be minions," she eventually replies. "They weren't here when we first did surveys, all those years ago. Something- sometHINGS are spawning an entire ecosystem out here, but we don't know what."

Before you can ask any more inconvenient questions (or more likely, questions whose answers are liable to keep scaring the shit out of you), the goddess of Nintendo keeps talking, as calmly as she'd comment about the weather:

"Those pictures all along the side of your door were interesting."

... if you weren't in Neptune's body, you'd fling yourself off the edge of the island and/or impale yourself on the thorns all around you.

(Cont.)

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>>45647814
>CHOOSE ONE OF THE FOLLOWING:
[ ] [BURN THROUGH] You know what? Fine. Fine, you'll answer her damn questions about that damn scene, and get it over with. There's no putting the cat back into the bag.
[ ] [ARFOIRE] Okay, time to deflect onto something far more important- what DID Arfoire take from Blanc, and how did it fuck her up so bad? She's, like, stuck halfway into goddess form, or can't turn back, or whatever.
[ ] [HYPERDIMENSION] Y'know what, you're just going to keep asking about the void. You NEED this information like burning, because you're being forced to live out here, and you sure as hell don't want to die out here.
[ ] [FLEE] CAN'T TALK, NO TIME, RUNNING FAST, GOSH YOU HOPE NEPTUNE'S ALRIGHT.
[ ] [FUCK REALITY] CAN'T TALK, USING THERAPIST, BEEP BEEP BOOP BOOP NOT LISTENING.
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>45647848
>[ ] [FUCK REALITY] CAN'T TALK, USING THERAPIST, BEEP BEEP BOOP BOOP NOT LISTENING.

[X] [BURN THROUGH] You know what? Fine. Fine, you'll answer her damn questions about that damn scene, and get it over with. There's no putting the cat back into the bag.

Yes, Neptune hates Eggplants, very funny they're shaped like dongs ha ha ha very funny.

>>45647848
>[ ] [BURN THROUGH] You know what? Fine. Fine, you'll answer her damn questions about that damn scene, and get it over with. There's no putting the cat back into the bag.

[ ] [FUCK REALITY] CAN'T TALK, USING THERAPIST, BEEP BEEP BOOP BOOP NOT LISTENING.

>>45647848
>[X] [BURN THROUGH] You know what? Fine. Fine, you'll answer her damn questions about that damn scene, and get it over with. There's no putting the cat back into the bag.
Just let it happen.

>>45647879
I think some of the reasons why she hates them is because she thinks they turn your eyes and hair purple.

>>45647848
>[ ] [BURN THROUGH] You know what? Fine. Fine, you'll answer her damn questions about that damn scene, and get it over with. There's no putting the cat back into the bag.

Concentrate on your surroundings, so that you don't alarm something unneccessarily. Keep the answers short.

>>45647848
>[ ] [HYPERDIMENSION] Y'know what, you're just going to keep asking about the void. You NEED this information like burning, because you're being forced to live out here, and you sure as hell don't want to die out here.

Oh, you know, Dwarven histories, highly stylized, can't believe everything you read. So, about this void...

>>45647848
>[ ] [BURN THROUGH] You know what? Fine. Fine, you'll answer her damn questions about that damn scene, and get it over with. There's no putting the cat back into the bag.

>>45647848
>[ ] [BURN THROUGH] You know what? Fine. Fine, you'll answer her damn questions about that damn scene, and get it over with. There's no putting the cat back into the bag.

>>45647665
>>45647668
>>45647672
Actually, Planeptune is the name of Sega's (Neptune's) nation. Not Neptunia.

>>45647848
>>45647848
>[ ] [FUCK REALITY] CAN'T TALK, USING THERAPIST, BEEP BEEP BOOP BOOP NOT LISTENING.

>>45647848
[ ] [FUCK REALITY] CAN'T TALK, USING THERAPIST, BEEP BEEP BOOP BOOP NOT

Except we should also add Blanc to our therapist. Maybe mutter that she seems to be more interested in those carvings than is appropriate.

>>45647961
>Except we should also add Blanc to our therapist. Maybe mutter that she seems to be more interested in those carvings than is appropriate.

....Idea

>[ ] [EQUATE ART] Compare the carvings with the design on the windows in the Lowee basilicom

>>45647790
>weren't raised in a barn
Of course we weren't. We were "raised in a god forsaken hole in the ground" and that's a quote.

>Hyperdimension

>>45647848
>[X] [BURN THROUGH] You know what? Fine. Fine, you'll answer her damn questions about that damn scene, and get it over with. There's no putting the cat back into the bag.
Speaking of cats, let's mew adorably while we're at it.
Why not. We're trapped in Neptune's body. We have no Dwarven Dignity left.

Drink. Drink heavily. Lots of drinks. Way over the liMom is scared

>>45647848

SecondING >>45648060

>>45648322
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YfFciVjnNek

...oh god, the moe personification of Takeshi's Challenge.

>>45648397
Beat Takeshi in a skirt

>>45647848
Burn Through

.....Blanc would appreciate hearing that Rokko still manages to get into hijinks

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>>45647848
>[X] [BURN THROUGH]

Hah. You absentmindedly twirl a purple braid around your finger, sweating bullets. Y-Yeah, they were, weren't they? Like that thing about Neptune and the eggplants-

"No, I know about that," Blanc says calmly, cutting you off. You haven't known her for too long, but even you're a little weirded out; she's transformed, but she's /calm/. It's mostly common knowledge that she's a foulmouthed firebrand when she's transformed. "Everyone knows Neptune hates eggplants so much that she's banned them wholesale from Planeptune, and that there's a thriving black market trade for them. I'm asking about the other pictures."

... nngh. You know what? Fine. Forget beating around the bush, forget awkwardly changing the subject- you're just going to get this shit over with and TELL her what happened. She's a goddess! She's bound to have heard weirder and more embarrassing stories! Tons and tons of terrible groping stories! This won't faze her one bit!

When you finish (mostly) explaining, Blanc side-eyes you. "Wow. Their hands slid under your breastplate? Just like that? That's the weirdest 'accidental' groping story I've heard in a long time."

Armok dammit.

"But that's good."

Ha ha ha, holy shit, fuck her t-

"No, I don't mean it like that." The blue-haired goddess pauses, gingerly placing a foot between two awkwardly-placed vines. "Estelle felt relaxed enough that she let loose. She can get quite raunchy sometimes."

You nudge aside a vine, trying to get its thorns to face away. Come on, that's really, REALLY not encouraging-

(Cont.)

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>>45648792
"It is. Do you have any idea how long it's been since Rokko acted so mischievously?" Finally, Blanc cranes her neck to look right (up) at you, her eyes sharp. "Or how long Estelle has been in that funk of hers?"

... oh. Right. That angst they've been carrying around. You hazard your best guess: too damn long?

"Too damn long," Blanc agrees, kicking aside a vine.

A few moments pass.

"... I don't know why they're sticking around with you," she adds suddenly. "I don't know what you are to them. Either way, I'm glad you've been sticking with them."

Huh. You don't know what to say to that, so you just... sort of grunt noncommittally.

"Although I don't know why they chose to grope you, of all people." Blanc's eyes go half-lidded with exasperation. "Estelle prefers them larger. Not small, like us."

... okay, you /definitely/ don't know what to say to that, so instead of correcting her- yeah, let's just go with another noncommittal grunt.

The goddess freezes in place. For a moment, you're wildly terrified that she has some sort of lie detector or breast sensor, but then you realize she's settling into a battle stance. "Something's wro-"

>Urist Twelfthbay rolls to dodge!
ROLL d100! (dice+1d100 in the email field)
Taking the best of three!
DC: 80; Bonus: +15!

>>45648792
>knows Neptune hates eggplants so much that she's banned them wholesale from Planeptune, and that there's a thriving black market trade for them
That's pretty amazing actually.
We need to muscle in on that market.

Rolled 80 + 15 (1d100 + 15)

>>45648812

Rolled 11 (1d100)

Come on, snake eyes.
Wait, I forgot how rolls work. Do we have to beat the DC, or is it like Dark Heresy where we try to roll under the target number?

Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>45648812

Rolled 32 (1d100)

>>45648812

>>45648834
Nailed it first try

Rolled 98 (1d100)

>>45648835
>Rolled 11 (1d100)
>Come on, snake eyes.
holy shit

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>>45648834

>>45648834
First try, out of the park.
>>45648835
>>45648836
Look at these guys.

>>45648835
The plus fifteen should be a hint that we want larger numbers.

>>45648885
Well, in Dark Heresy, bonuses are also conveyed as +XX, but they modify the target number.

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>>45648834
WELL OKAY THEN, writing!!

>>45648835
Bigger is better, yes!

>>45648911
> bigger is better

SadBlanc.paizuri

>>45648998
I mean SadBlanc.naizuri

>>45648911
>Bigger is better
Estelle seemed fine with Urist's B cup.

>>45648858

...that lady either has a gigantic goddamn head or very tiny arms.

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>>45648998
>>45649017
>>45649050
... okay

I walked right into that one

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>>45649077
Lady Blanc is a washboard!

>>45649283
Just how I like 'em

>>45649326
Enraged and homicidial?

>>45649435
yes

>>45649435
Only if I'm extra lucky.

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>>45648812
>>45648834
>DC:.........
>JUST RIGHT (+15)

As much as you really, really, REALLY hate to admit it, you're getting used to having a little goddess inside of you. When Neptune isn't yammering in your head or ~accidentally~ activating her powers, having CPU Purple Heart's powers is... kinda like having a second set of instincts

And when those instincts scream at you to /jump/, you know damn well to listen to them and let that shit happen.

Even before the ground shifts beneath you, you're already springing off the balls of your feet, purple metal panels snapping open around you and propelling you further up into the air. All around you, countless thorny vines are roiling across the island, thrashing wildly like the tentacles of some godforsaken forgotten beast and oh HELL that's /exactly/ what they are.

Finally, you take control of your thrusters and jet farther up; by sheer luck, you're narrowly dodging the vines whipping toward your legs- REACHING for your legs. You don't give a single flying fuck about Neptunization right now- for one thing, you're already at like 999%, and for another, NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE.

You boost yourself backward, the wind whistling in your ears, and the thorny tentacle-vines follow you, spiraling in and around themselves like they're fighting to see which one catches you first. Taking advantage of CPU Purple Heart's agility, you stop on a dime and take off in another direction, the vines falling behind as they collapse in a midair tangle.

... belatedly, you realize that Blanc isn't following.

(Cont.)

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>>45649610

Goddammit- you cast about wildly before quickly spotting CPU White Heart below you, thrashing about with her megaton hammer-maul-thing. She's not flying up fast enough, and her movements are sluggish, and the vine wrapping up her calf isn't helping-

Further out, you see a writhing bunch of tentacles coalescing into a larger mass, like it's trying to form up into something... something huge, easily as tall as a building, dwarfing even, uh, non-dwarf-you.

What the hell.

Two blinding lights burn into existence, within that half-formed mass. -MY WAIFUS,- a garbled voice booms.

What the HELL.

[ ] [FREE BLANC] Get Blanc free, and get Blanc out of here. Not sticking around to fight that fucking thing, nope nope NOPE NOPE.
[ ] [DISTRACT MONSTER] Fly right in front of its eyes and grab its attention away from Blanc- give her a chance to free herself. You gotta go fast, and CPU Purple Heart CAN go fast.
[ ] [ATTACK!!] Go in, sword flashing. You're not giving that thing a chance to form up OR chase you, because fuck that noise, you're not leaving this here to ambush you later!
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>45649630
You're waifu a shit

>>45649630
>[ ] [FREE BLANC] Get Blanc free, and get Blanc out of here. Not sticking around to fight that fucking thing, nope nope NOPE NOPE.

>>45649630
>[ ] [DISTRACT MONSTER] Fly right in front of its eyes and grab its attention away from Blanc- give her a chance to free herself. You gotta go fast, and CPU Purple Heart CAN go fast.
>[ ] [ATTACK!!] Go in, sword flashing. You're not giving that thing a chance to form up OR chase you, because fuck that noise, you're not leaving this here to ambush you later!
Quick decisive hit, be an ample distraction then get back.

>>45649630
Waifus, what the fuck is this, you don't have more than one waifu unless you're a fucking mormon

>>45649630
>[ ] [FREE BLANC] Get Blanc free, and get Blanc out of here. Not sticking around to fight that fucking thing, nope nope NOPE NOPE.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

>>45649630
>[ ] [FREE BLANC] Get Blanc free, and get Blanc out of here. Not sticking around to fight that fucking thing, nope nope NOPE NOPE.

[ ] [ATTACK!!] Go in, sword flashing. You're not giving that thing a chance to form up OR chase you, because fuck that noise, you're not leaving this here to ambush you later!
banzai

>>45649630
>[X] [ATTACK!!] Go in, sword flashing. You're not giving that thing a chance to form up OR chase you, because fuck that noise, you're not leaving this here to ambush you later!
>[X] [WRITE-IN] "This is the Police! We know you've got a loli-waifu in there! Chris Hansen is coming, so just give up now!"

>>45649630
>[ ] [FREE BLANC] Get Blanc free, and get Blanc out of here. Not sticking around to fight that fucking thing, nope nope NOPE NOPE.

>>45649701
no motherfucker, we are not edgardo

>>45649630
>[X] [FREE BLANC] Get Blanc free, and get Blanc out of here. Not sticking around to fight that fucking thing, nope nope NOPE NOPE.

Fuck this shit!

>>45649630
>[X] [FREE BLANC] Get Blanc free, and get Blanc out of here. Not sticking around to fight that fucking thing, nope nope NOPE NOPE.

>>45649630
>[ ] [ATTACK!!] Go in, sword flashing. You're not giving that thing a chance to form up OR chase you, because fuck that noise, you're not leaving this here to ambush you later!

Guys I think this thing has Shovel Knight! Remember when we contacted her via dream She was caught in a situation just like this, waifu comments and all!

>>45649630
>[ ] [ATTACK!!] Go in, sword flashing. You're not giving that thing a chance to form up OR chase you, because fuck that noise, you're not leaving this here to ambush you later!

Eradicate it and all it similiars, because those words should never be saied, uttered and especially never screamed.
Burn down this monstrous abomination, Salt its birthing places and disolve all its offspring in highly concentrated base solutions.
Cast "Finger of ultimate Doom" on its remains (If miraculously there are any left.) just to be sure it is stricken from all existence.

And slap captcha for tyring to prevent me from posting this.

>>45649795
WAIT. OH SHIET.
>[ATTACK]

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>>45649739

>>45649630
[ ] [ATTACK!!] Go in, sword flashing. You're not giving that thing a chance to form up OR chase you, because fuck that noise, you're not leaving this here to ambush you later!

> [x] Summons

See if we can summon Dorf Neps to distract him. I regret nothing.

>>45649795
One more reason to Fuck him up.

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>>45649630
>[ ] [WRITE-IN]

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>>45649807

>>45649630
> Summon Dorf Neps

Hey, we were able to work the Sharicite, right? What possible wrong could come of filling the Void with broken versions of best Nep?

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>>45649630
Right, looks like the votes juuust about tilt toward going on the [ATTACK]- although this is where I'm gonna have to crash for the night, because weekday.

And also because we're having the next thread this SATURDAY, 2/28, at 8-ish pm EST! Updates and stuff will go at https://twitter.com/BlorpQuest, while questions can go to http://ask.fm/BlorpQuest and oh god I am so behind on answering stuff

Thanks for participating, guys, and sorry for keeping you waiting for so damn long- schedule should be reasonably stable for a while. Catch you next thread!

>>45649970
>next thread this SATURDAY, 2/28, at 8-ish pm EST
You fucking shameless liar

>>45649934
Red looks in your general direction with scorn.

>>45649970
Argh! You did it again Blorp! Why you torment this much?!
actually I love when you does that. see you later!

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>>45650009
ANON, PLEASE

>>45650079
PROVE ME WRONG IF YOU DARE

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>>45650110
SATURDAY, MOTHERFUCKER

>>45650079
Colonel Mustard. With diuretic medicine. In a diner.

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>>45650174

>>45650172
I AM GOING TO RUB YOUR FACE IN YOUR BLATANT LIES SO FUCKING HARD WHEN YOU RUN AGAIN IN ONE OR TWO MONTHS

SEE IF I DON'T

>>45650172
We will see about that, Blorp! If ya don't shows up on Saturday, I will spam next thread with pictures of lewd eggplants!