BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP-“Shut up,” you growl, already in a foul mood. You spy with one forcefully cracked-open eye the time – 0700 – while your alarm clock suggests “Would you like to snooze?” in the serene uncaring voice of a computer. The lights of your windowless cabin turn on as you sit up in bed, not that there would be anything to see even if there was a window, here on board TSAB Headquarters floating through the starless space in between dimensions.“Why don’t you take your snooze function and stick it up your-“ you manage to catch yourself in the nick of time before you finish the sentence. Starting today, you’re going to need to watch your language, a prospect which doesn’t improve your mood any. At least, the damn beeping stops, the alarm clock deciding that you’ve been roused beyond the point of no return.For years you had looked forward to this day: working your way up the ranks from a lowly officer, learning the ropes of command as XO, and finally here you are, skipper of your very own ship within the TSAB multidimensional navy, a position of no small responsibility.If only it were a position of no small prestige. Instead you’re practically the laughingstock of the fleet, having been assigned command of the TSL Nimbus, more commonly called the TSL School Bus. While your fellow captains move ahead with their careers, commanding proper ships with proper crew, you’re going to be flying a glorified high school for the “special needs” mages of the TSAB.The worst part of it is that you don’t even know which flag puke you had offended enough for them to pull the strings needed to get back at you in this way.There’s still a few hours to kill before the scheduled time to take official command of the Nimbus. Maybe you should have set your alarm clock a bit later today, but you’re far too awake to fall back asleep again.Find your new ship and crew.Find the admiral and give him a piece of your mind.
>>45654620It's not that no one is interested, just a poor time to run a quest. Wait for a couple of hours (Around 5-6).
>>45654620>[x]Find your new ship and crew.What, are they sticking us in command of the Stingray?
>>45654620>Find your new ship and crew.If the flag officer is pissed off enough to saddle us with this, yelling at him more will only make things worse.
>>45654620>Find your new ship and crew.We man or woman?
>>45654905Thanks for the suggestion. Time zones are preparing, please wait warmly, etc.
>>45655333So uh...we doin this or what?Am goin to sleep
>>45656217In about 7-8 hours. Go catch some shuteye.
Forced Teleportation to page 1!This seems to be fun. Waiting for the begin of the quest.
>>45657238Me too Anon.Me too
Is it time yet?
>>45661737It'll be time when it's time. Patience.
Clearly it's time for us to take our crew of 'special needs' mages and turn them into the most feared badasses known to man.
>>45663209We need copious amounts of thishttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZSS5dEeMX64implying OP is coming back
>>45663304Have faith in OP Anon!
Thank you for your patience! And now, back to our scheduled programming![X]Find your new ship and crew.If someone somewhere up on high is already pissed off enough to saddle you with this, yelling will only make things worse. Best to suck it up and deal with it quietly. Maybe, you’ll end up mentoring the next Ace of Aces and making your name that way. And maybe hell will freeze over and pigs fly while you’re at it, too. You go through the morning rituals more or less on autopilot – start up the ubiquitous coffee maker, make yourself presentable, pull on your navy blues, grab the steaming mug and go – looking the part of a proper captain even though you’ve already resigned yourself to a fate of rust buckets, incompetent clowns and plea-bargained criminals.The TSL Nimbus sits at her assigned berth at the headquarter’s docks, undergoing the final touches of maintenance and resupply. Even a fresh coat of paint can’t hide her age, looking like a giant tuning fork compared to the sleek arrowheads of the other ships in port. You make your way down to her berth, dock workers giving you the most perfunctory of salutes as you pass, their attentions focused on getting off the job as the shift ends.
The Nimbus is one of the few L-class ships still in service, most of them replaced by the new LS-class already. In their time her class was a serviceable vessel for patrol and reconnaissance, but today her reactor is considered underpowered, and the old dimensional space drive that necessitated her tuning fork shape is analogous to an honest-to-Saint-Kaiser wind-powered sail on a seafaring ship.At least her weapons can’t be said to be outdated, because she had NONE. Some idiot had designed an entire class of warship without weapons, more idiots had actually approved it, and then a generation of very brave or very stupid captains had actually captained the flying death-traps without mutinying. You see that somebody had at least tried to slap a bandaid on that gaping wound – a retrofitted Augusto-type cannon had been welded onto the hull. Too bad the Augusto is a limp-dicked piece of shit.On the bow, someone has kindly rechristened her the TSL Love Bus, pink spray paint covering the Nimbus’s name, complete with little pink hearts.Somebody is going to PAY for this!At least get it right you idiots – it’s TSL SCHOOL Bus.Sigh, and get on board.This is great! No, seriously!
>>45664268Sigh, and get on board.Grumble,grumble.
>>45664242Sigh, and get on board.
>>45664268>Sigh, and get on board.It could worse. It could be called the TSL 'short' bus
>>45664268>Love BusMade me think of the orgy bus in HotD.
>>45664268>At least get it right you idiots – it’s TSL SCHOOL Bus.
Calling it for>Sigh, and get on board.
ded again already?
>Sigh, and get on board.You sigh in resignation, take a sip from your mug while wishing you’d put something stronger in it, and trudge on board the TSL Love Bus. No sense spiking your blood pressure this early in the morning.“Captain on deck!” a woman cries out smartly the moment you step onto the bridge. The brunette in pristine navy uniform who snapped rigidly to attention gives you a salute. “Executive Officer Liera Harlaown reporting,>sir!”>ma’am!”“At ease,” you return the salute automatically, taken aback slightly – if she hadn’t said otherwise you’d have guessed her to be an ensign instead of your second-in-command. Then again, if she’s a Harlaown, that’ll explain why she holds this rank despite looking young enough to be carded at the bar. But if she’s a Harlaown, why is she here?“Who’s the kid?” you ask, waving towards the only other person on the bridge – definitely too young to drink, a young man looking out of place in his uniform, like a boy wearing his father’s suit. He scrambles out of the comm officer’s chair, somehow managing to bump his purple mop against an instrument panel that wasn’t even in his way.“Atatata – I mean, Communications Officer Alexander Lowran, reporting for duty!” Kaiser, his voice even cracked for a moment there.“So, what’re you two up to?” you ask.Your XO speaks up first. “There’s a bug in the comms, but we’ll have it fixed before we’re underway. The rest of the crew is stationside, except for the Chief Engineer, captain. She’s fixing another reactor leak-”>Reactor leak? ABORT abort abandon ship!>What do you mean, ANOTHER reactor leak?>Bring me to engineering, now.
>>45666107>sir!”>What do you mean, ANOTHER reactor leak?>Bring me to engineering, now.
>>45666107>>What do you mean, ANOTHER reactor leak?
>>45666107>sir!”>What do you mean, ANOTHER reactor leak?How has this ship not been decommissioned? Probably costs more to keep the old thing afloat than it would to just replace it.
>>45666210inb4 it's something stupid, like a person forgot and then another person forgot. The third realized but didn't care etc.
>What do you mean, ANOTHER reactor leak?“XO?” you breathe out, your voice so calm a zen master could learn from it.“Yes, sir?” she snaps to attention, rightly sensing the calm before the storm.“What do you mean, another reactor leak? Does this imply that reactor leaks are a regular occurrence aboard this vessel?”“It’s nothing to worry about, sir, it happens every month or so, but every time-“You laugh, and laugh, and laugh, while Harlaown and Lowran stare at you in confusion. It’s surprisingly cathartic. “This is a game, right?” You wheeze out when you finally gain some semblance of control over your aching diaphragm.“I don’t understand, sir?”“There’s a betting pool behind all this, am I right or what? How long does it take before the skipper goes off the deep end?”Harlaown growls at that and leans forward, cheeks turning pink in anger. “This is not a game-“But you continue, speaking above her both aurally and literally – you’re a head taller than she is, which makes her angry attempt to get up close to you more comical than anything. “Too bad for you, I know how this game works – the only winning move is not to play. This is the TSL Nimbus, not the TSL School Bus, nor is she the TSL Love Bus as one of you wankers has so kindly stencilled, and she is most definitely not the TSL Time Bomb. I’m going to get some breakfast, and when I get back I expect to find the TSL Nimbus, shipshape with her entire crew on board and ready to launch, with no reactor problems whatsoever to speak of. Do I make myself clear?”
Without waiting for a reply you spin around on your heels and head for the gangplank, ignoring your XO’s stutters of protest. The moment you step foot outside the ship, you hear a young girl shouting in a shrill voice.“Unidentified personnel detected! Subdual tactics authorized! BURNING LOVE SIGN SUUUUPAAARAAAKUUU!”You see a girl in a white-and-pink outfit standing at the foot of the gangplank and pointing a mage’s staff towards you, but you can’t see much in the way of details, because the giant pink beam of energy bearing down directly upon you is washing out most other details from your field of vision.>BARRIER>SHIELD>DODGE>THROW THE COFFEE
Unfortunately real life beckons now. Be back in about 20 hours.Will try to type faster next time, etc., etc.
>>45667616>>DODGEIF YOU CAN DODGE A DEATHBEAMYOU CAN DODGE A BALL
>>45667616>DODGEThis was drilled into our heads
>>45667730Should we bumped it or let it go?